#also i left katherine's character out of this because this is purely focused on jack and davey's relationship in the show

[we-are-inevitable]

it's time once again for unsolicited newsies opinions with jac! on the chopping block for today: a look into David Jacobs being the "mom friend", featuring classism in the newsies fandom. yay!

disclaimer: this is purely my opinion and i am not trying to start discourse. i don't really care if you don't agree! it's fine to have your own thoughts. these are mine.

moving right along, the biggest thing- and something i talk about quite a lot- is that it's interesting that people see Davey as the mom friend.

ok first of all, i feel like to be the """""mom friend""""" you have to be really well established into the group as someone who has been, is, and always will be a caregiver.

and davey does not fit this description!

also: "mom friend" is just a weird term in general; it just feels like a backhanded title for a friend to have. most "mom friends" are forced into- or force themselves into- the role because all they're """good for""" is caring for others and pushing themselves to the side

anyway! moving on

you're not just going to make a new friend and immediately label them as the mom friend, because you don't know their personality or how they mesh with the group, yet this is what the newsies in fanon seem to do with davey.

is davey loyal to the cause? absolutely! does he want what's best for the newsies? yeah! but he's never going to have the same history that jack has with the boys, since jack has been taking care of them for a while. if anyone is going to be the "mom friend," it's jack.

there's a difference between Davey making a speech at the rally advocating for workers rights and united boroughs, and Jack taking care of all of the newsies for as long as he's been the leader.

Jack is more of a family member, Davey is more of a spokesperson. joining the strike and coming up with the rally- which failed, as @jack-kellys pointed out- doesn't mean that Davey automatically replaces Jack as the parental figure of the group.

also, as @roideny pointed out in a conversation on discord, it's kind of... sketch? seeing people replace Jack with Davey?

Jack is undoubtedly the "parent" of the newsies. a lot of them don't have families, and he's had to step up. he's been stepping up. he's responsible, he has the newsies best interests in mind, and sometimes he can be a little selfish in his wants- hi, Santa Fe!- but it's because he's under so much pressure.

so why does the fandom take Jack and replace him with Davey as the "mom friend" ??

i think we know why!

it's interesting to see that people will see a smart kid who uses big words and is somewhat more well off than the other newsies and say, "yeah. he's the one who takes care of everyone."

as if Jack hasn't been doing that for YEARS.

wow !! the kid with an education and more money is the one who steps up and acts as a "parent" to the poor kids !! because the leader is a "disaster dumbass" who is also a poor orphan !! isn't it funny how that works out !!

and this idea coupled with the rising popularity of poc jack kelly........ do you see where i'm going with this? the connotations are there.

all i'm trying to say is:

there's so much in this fandom that just shows that everyone is only paying attention to the actors and the characters, not

how the characters interact with the world and class systems around them

how the characters interact with each other as products/victims of the systems around them

there's no denying that David Jacobs is a good and loyal friend. but you can't sit here and say that he's the one who tries to "tame" or "parent" the kids who are less fortunate than him. it just leaves a sour taste in the mouths of the audience.

Jack Kelly is more of a "mom friend" than David Jacobs will ever be (even though "mom friend" is a sketchy way to describe it). he's not constantly a disaster- he's a stressed teenager with the weight of the world on his shoulders, in charge of a huge group of kids who deserve so much better than what society is giving him. cut him some slack. he's not stupid, yet the fandom paints him to be this wild, impulsive, dumb guy who cant tell left from right. are we really going to ignore the entirety of canon? are we going to ignore everything Jack did for the newsies? intelligence doesn't equal education. as @the-calvarys-coming-out put it: Jack would've been unstoppable if he had the same resources as other kids.

in conclusion: our fandom as a whole needs to reevaluate the fact that this show isn't just about characters and fun friendships onstage. this show is about classism and class inequality. just be mindful that some of your opinions, headcanons, and ideas can are liable to go against this core meaning of the musical, and understand why.

and again, big thanks to @roideny @jack-kellys and @the-calvarys-coming-out for helping me get my thoughts in order! love you guys very much 💙

[katherineparrish]

WANTED PLOTS + CONNECTIONS

hello~ meet katherine parrish (24, she/her), though she goes by “candy” when she’s dancing at speakeasy. she’s a little cold but like a cat she’ll warm up to you if you feed her.

below the cut is more info & some random ideas i had off the top of my head. ofc i would love to brainstorm ideas w/ all of y’all so hmu if u have anything else planned <3

you can read her full bio here (trigger warning for v brief mentions of drug abuse), but here’s the tldr version:

born & raised in augusta, oldest of 3. parents worked long hours to provide for their family, leaving her to look after her little brother & sister all throughout her childhood. family was always straddling the poverty line.

has always wanted what her parents never had: a stable, cushy job where she would never have to worry about making it paycheck to paycheck. plans to be an accountant and leave augusta as soon as she can.

started stripping after high school bc it pays better than any other place in town even though she’s pissed she doesn’t have health insurance.

drug abuse tw: her sister became a teen mom & her brother got became an addict, leaving her to feel like a failure of a sister and makes her feel like she needs to stay in augusta and make sure her family doesn’t fall apart.

left her family’s home after her nephew was born, thanks the gods every day that taurus lets her rent the apartment above rough draft for cheap.

commutes to community college and is working on her bachelor’s. easier said than done, “sleep” is nothing more than a 5-letter word.

plots:

someone she’s known practically all her life goes to where she works one night, and katherine has to treat them like any other client & try to get money out of them even though it’s awkward as hell.

katherine has a lot of creepy clients & after a shift one of them tries to follow her back home. your character gets to witness her tase them & can either join in on dishing out karma or has to hold katherine back from breaking his balls.

katherine’s beat-up old car is so old that her mechanic gives it a senior citizen’s discount. it also breaks down a lot, which is not a good thing when her commute to school is like an hour. your character sees her hitchhiking on the road and can either help her or make fun of how ugly her car is.

platonic connections:

just small town girl: katherine was born and raised in augusta so if your character was is also a local, it’s safe to assume that they know each other’s life stories, which is annoying and convenient. small-town perks and all. maybe the two of them grew up together and there’s practically no shared secrets between them, or maybe they watched katherine grow up and think it’s funny how she’s another one of those kids who swears she’s gonna make it out of this deadbeat town one day.

of all the gin joints in all the world: is loyal to the rough draft and spends most of her free time there. either she’s studying at the bar before class or blowing off steam with a beer after a shift. or, she’s taking a power nap in one of booths bc she was too tired to make it up to her apartment. if your character is a regular at the rough draft there’s no doubt they’ve run into her at one point and discovered how much more chill she is after 2 drinks.

she’s stackin money everywhere she goes: a regular client at speakeasy, for whatever reason they prefer candy’s company over the other dancers. maybe they know the only way to get affection from katherine is by paying for it, or maybe they just want someone to talk to and she’s cheaper than a therapist. and katherine enjoys their company bc she knows they’re a consistently good tipper and they’re one of the few people who don't treat her like an object. for whatever reason, they haven’t crossed the line to being friends outside of the club, even though they get along well enough in the private booths.

hit the books, jack: they go to the same community college together. sometimes they even carpool if their class schedules overlap, which is a blessing for katherine bc the hunk of junk she calls a car can barely survive the hour-long commute. they count on each other for notes and spend a lot of time hunched over books, motivating each other to get their homework done and dreaming of degrees that’ll get them to a better life out of augusta.

it’s all about the money, money, money: katherine knows how to make a dollar out of fifteen cents. she’s hoping to be an accountant one day and already knows how to balance a checkbook & do her taxes like a pro. your character probably isn’t all that savvy with money and look to katherine's money-saving skills even though she’s not above charging for her services.

romantic connections: katherine is bisexual so these plots are open to all genders~

exes and oh’s: the relationship was fine up until katherine became candy. call it jealousy or insecurity or whatever you want, they simply weren’t comfortable with the idea of their girlfriend being intimate with strangers every night. they wanted her to find another job, no matter how many times katherine insisted it was purely professional and it was the best way to be financially independent. maybe katherine was being too insensitive about their feelings, more focused on making money than preserving their relationships.

let’s talk about sex baby: fuck buddies, nothing more nothing less. katherine doesn’t have time for the messy feelings that serious relationships ask for, but everyone needs to blow off steam from time to time. these two have an arrangement that works for them. because katherine’s work & class schedule is so hectic, their one-night stands don’t always take place at night, but they’re always fulfilling.

dynamite with a laser beam: a regular client who never seems to understand that katherine won’t date anyone who goes to speakeasy. they think they have a shot, and keep paying for dances even though the hour always ends the same way. the last thing she needs to do is mix her personal and work life together. but she won’t say no to their money, and will keep selling them a fantasy even if she’s the only one who knows it won’t lead to anything more than that.

took the midnight train goin’ anywhere: an ex that katherine wishes she never wasted time on bc it hurts the hardest. they’re both locals, only this character didn’t understand why katherine would want to leave augusta. they both wanted two entirely different futures together and it’s what ended them. every time they run into each other, they can’t help but still try to change the other person’s mind.

antagonistic connections:

mary magdalene from a pole dance: someone with a low opinion of sex workers; they might not even realize they’re being offensive, thinking they’re being helpful with comments like “you’re so smart, why are you wasting your life dancing on a pole?” and “you’ll never have a future if you keep working there.” maybe they think that katherine just hasn’t “tried hard enough” to find a “real” job and keeps giving her unwanted applications to places in augusta that won’t work with her class schedule or pay her as well. katherine likes to goad them by saying they need to pay for a dance if they want her to talk to them.

shut up and drive: a regular client who likes to flex how financially secure they are every chance they get while katherine’s grinning & bearing it thru every dance. she isn’t in a position to refuse work but she secretly hates how they act like she’s only worthy of their time when they’re paying her to take her top off. they barely acknowledge her existence outside of the club, for their own reasons, and she tries not to let it rile her up but often fails.

drug abuse tw - the needle & the spoon:katherine loves her little brother and hates that he’s an addict. maybe this character runs in the same circles, fuels his addiction. katherine thinks they’re scum and won’t hesitate to tell them so, her mama bear instincts coming out in full force.

love to hate u: they grew up together and have hated each other since the dawn of time, but it’s been so long that neither one of them can even remember how they became enemies. and neither one of them wants to be the first one to lend that olive branch, because throwing insults at each other is one of the few things that are consistent in this weird town.

[willreadforbooze]

Hello fellow boozie readers!

If you haven’t heard about #Booziebookathon, it’s our week long readathon we host every year! AND ITS RIGHT MEOW!! Check out all the details here! Shout out to Linz and Melinda for doing ALL of the planning for it. You’re the best. Be sure to follow our readathon twitter for sprints!

Sam’s Update:

I got a lot of reading done this week, which is surprising, considering how busy it was. But Booziebookathon started on Saturday, and got a bunch done. I’ve decided that I’ve failed at Medieval-a-thon…. cause I definitely didn’t read what I said I would. The NEWTs start on Thursday (our TBRs scheduled to drop on Thursday), so I gotta finish up these books so I can start my Metal Charmer career!

What Sam finished this week:

Recursion by Blake Crouch: I adored Dark Matter and Ginny and Parker both adored this one so I picked it up on audio. About half way through and loving it, I need to know how it ends.

Descendant of the Crane by Joan He: WOWOWOWOWOW. I couldn’t put this down. I flew through it, only to be SO SAD that this isn’t a series. I seriously need to know more. RUDE.

What Sam’s reading now:

Booziebookathon Gin: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid: Oh holy shit, whyyyy did I think this book was over-hyped? It is perfectly hyped. I’m listening on audio and LOVING IT.

Booziebookathon White Wine and Smirnoff Ice: Demon in the Whitelands by Nikki Z. Richard: This had a slow start, but basically this is a post-apocalyptic story where all technology is banned. The bastard son of a cleric, Samuel, is basically thrust into the role of being a caretaker to what the mayor calls a “demon”. A child, albiet violent child, with one arm and doesn’t speak. His job is to befriend it/her. I’m enjoying it now… that I’m 2/3 the way through, but I don’t feel the urge to pick it back up each time…

The Candle and the Flame by Nafiza Azad: Buddy reading with Ginny and Liz and also for book club. It’s taken an interesting turn but I don’t want to say too much here, because we still have to discuss as a group.

Ginny’s Update:

Currently Reading:

The Candle and the Flame by Nafiza Azad: This is still for a book club, I’m still reading it slowly. There was a pretty big twist and I’m enjoying seeing it ripple out.

Leap Days: Chronicles of a Midlife Move by Katherin Lanpher: this is one of my books for Boozie Bookathon and it fulfills my Gin challenge (book on tbr forever). So far Katherine has moved to New York and is talking about how weird it is… yup. It’s gonna be that kind of book.

The Mortal Word by Genevieve Cogman: IT’S THAT TIME! I’m reading the fifth book in this series that I adore. Irene is being called in to act as mediator in a conversation between the Dragons and Fae. Her boss for the job is a major dick (and I’m pretty sure it’s going to turn out he’s even more sinister). Ugh, Loving this! (If you’d like to start at the beginning, my first review is here.

Finished

Born a Crime by Trevor Noah: Welp, Trevor Noah had a very interesting childhood. It’s interesting to read this book to see a completely different perspective of growing up. I’m used to hearing mostly Americanized, or at least overtly Western points of view, so to hear this story that was completely outside of what I consider the norm was endlessly interesting. I wasn’t super fond of the jumping around in time. I found it a little confusing at times, talking about his stepdad and then, chapters later, talking about how his stepdad came into his life. Overall, I still thought this was a strong narrative and would definitely suggest this to someone who likes biographies. 4.5/5

A Kiss for Midwinter by Courtney Milan: This is a novella that goes in the Brothers Sinister series. Gonna be honest, I don’t even remember who’s parents these are supposed to be and just read it as a standalone. It’s still charming. Dr. Grantham was there when as a teenager, Lydia was told she would never be in society becuase of a teenage pregnancy. He was also there years later as she wanted nothing to do with him. He’s quirky and she’s been hiding from things she hasn’t wanted to think about and it’s pretty damn fucking cute. I really enjoy the way Courtney writes her characters, there’s always depths. 4/5

Rafe: A Buff Male Nanny by Rebekah Weatherspoon: Yup, definitely back on my romance novel kick. This book was delightful as, as the author says, it’s pretty much just pure fluff. the kids are cute, and speak the way children do. Rafe was ridiculously attractive and a family man throughout. Sloan is ridiculously competent, dealing with a shitty ex-husband and just wants someone to make her life easy… Fortunately Rafe makes it very hard… that was terrible… I don’t apologize.4/5

An Unconditional Freedom by Alyssa Cole: Welp, Alyssa Cole is one of those always gonna read authors. I accidentally skipped book 2 (don’t worry, I’ll get back to it). This follows Elle’s friend from the first book Daniel, who is dealing with some emotional and psychological scars. Janeta Sanchez is trying to become a double spy in order to save her Southern beau and her family. Except, unsurprisingly, that beau is a jackass. But they’re in the Loyal League and trying to get some information. It’s interesting to read Daniel’s perspective and I liked getting both the internal and external perspective on him. Alyssa Cole is a phenomenal writer and ugh, so many good words. 4.5/5

The Soldier’s Scoundrel by Cat Sebastian: Well, Cat Sebastian is apparently another author where I’ll read everything. This is a delightful romance between Jack, who handles scandals behind the scenes, and Oliver, an ex-soldier who is worried that her sister has been scammed by Jack. They’re immediately attracted to each other but have to solve a mystery together for… reasons? REgardless, I really enjoy the way that Cat brings characters who might be outside of what is currently considered the norm, and shows the ways they could have lived in the past. She shows their struggles but makes sure they have a happy ending, and I just really enjoy that. Both of these characters are kind of dicks in their own way, but I enjoy their moments of earnestness. 4/5

What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami: I’m not a runner. I don’t ever think I’m a runner. But I think it’s fascinating to read running books and learn about what drives other people. It seems that so often running helps them quiet their minds. This book was interesting and I enjoyed a peek into an authors/runners mind. 3.5/5

Captain Marvel: Volume One by Kelly Sue Deconnick (there’s a bunch of people on this but my read list is already 7 books long and there’s just a limit to what I have the patience and energy to do): This was delightful. I’m not super familiar with Captain Marvel but I met Kelly Sue at Bookcon and really enjoyed meeting her (I’ve also read Bitch Planet, which if anyone wants to read a dystopian comic I highly suggest this one). I loved the mystery of what was causing the illness, and the way she could read between the lines. Ugh. This is what I wish more comics were. 5/5

Evvie Drake Starts Over by Linda Holmes: Probs gonna write a review on this one. Wait and see.

Temporary Break for BoozieBookaThon

Iron Gold by Pierce Brown: Gonna be honest, I don’t remember much from the original series but I used a random number general and this is what came up. I’m like two pages in so I’m mostly just confused.

Minda’s Update:

What Minda is reading now for Booziebookathon (and soon NEWTs):

The Liar’s Daughter by Megan Cooley Peterson – An ARC from ALA, out 9/10, for the Beer challenge. About a girl who was brainwashed by her father and his cult.

The Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick – As the winner of the 1963 Hugo Award, meets the Whiskey & Champagne challenges.

All Systems Red by Martha Wells – Following the longest, I thought I’d read the shortest for the Shot & White Wine challenges.

The Incendiaries by R.O. Kwon – I’ve borrowed/returned/renewed this title eight times, which I think means it’s been on my list for awhile. This fulfills the trifecta: Vodka, Gin, and Red Wine challenges.

What Minda finished before Booziebookathon: 

Tiger Queen by Annie Sullivan – I actually finished this at the start of my trip. This was good—the world building was especially inventive since it came out of a short story with an open ending. Review to come.

All the Water in the World by Karen Raney – This book was super sad and really tugged at the heartstrings—at least for the first half. Drops in early August! Stay tuned for review.

City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert – Listened to this one on audio during my flights… so many flights. But this book was super captivating! I would highly recommend reading the audiobook because of the writing style—it really feels like an old woman is telling her story to you. Also will review.

Clear My Name by Paula Daly – Crime fiction focused on a UK version of the innocence project. Edge-of-seat type stuff with an end twist I didn’t see coming. Also also will review!

Linz’s Update:

I was on family vacation–which we all know isn’t actually vacation–and still managed to get some reading done.

What Linz read:

No Judgments by Meg Cabot: One of the many Bookcon ARCs, this romcom-y book was…not great. The protagonist was pretty dumb and kind of shallow, the romance felt a little forced, and the resolution was really telegraphed.

Sophia, Princess Among Beasts by James Patterson: Woof. Basic. DNF.

We Set the Dark on Fire by Tehlor Kay Mejia: Girls are raised to be sisterwives in this dystopic, Latin-inspired first of a series. The concept is actually pretty good and I loved the love story twist, but the worldbuilding left me wanting.

The Way You Make Me Feel by Maureen Goo: I liked this more than I thought I would. The protagonist is a monster, but I just spent the week with teenage relatives so it’s not inaccurate. Goo’s take on diversity is interesting and thoughtful. There is also a foodtruck and I was starving while reading.

Patron Saints of Nothing by Randy Ribay: My first finished book for booziebookathon AND MY HEART COULD NOT TAKE IT. Authentic, on point, emotional rollercoaster.

What Linz is currently reading:

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern: WHICH I AM BACKBURNER-ING BECAUSE OF BOOZIEBOOKATHON BUT I AM GOING TO CLAW MY FACE OFF UNTIL I CAN PICK IT BACK UP IT IS SO GOOD

– *About* to start Slay by Brittney Morris, but imma need a minute after finishing Patron Saints of Nothing

Until next time, we remain forever drunkenly yours,

Sam, Melinda, Linz, and Ginny

Weekly Wrap-Up: July 22-28, 2019 Hello fellow boozie readers! If you haven't heard about #Booziebookathon, it's our week long readathon we host every year!

[popdelton2]

newsies modern au for anon

ohh my god okay i went into desktop web mode on my phone to do this and get a read more because i am DEDICATED to simultaneously spilling my guts AND not making anyone read two hours and two years of newsies headcanons so here it is this took me literally five hours to answer despite having a seven page document for reference also thank you i love you for this

EDIT: I HAD TO USE A SIDEBLOG SO I COULD LINK TO THIS POST AND AVOID BOMBARDING MY FOLLOWERS? THIS SITE! IS! ASS!

GOD OKAY i do not know how old this ask is because the tumblr app is ASS and didn’t give me ANY notification that i got a message but yes i love you thank you absolutely i’ll tell you about my newsies modern au i’ve been vibrating out of my skin to tell someone about this it’s nothing and everything at the same time i have 6 pages of headcanons and no real plot! because of who i am as a person!

anyway some of my personal favorite parts (of many):

- background: honestly it mostly focuses on jack and katherine and david and crutchie because Main Squad Best Squad i love all my dancing newsboys but there’s only so much you can do when there’s 800 of them with minimal character development. everyone is in that same 17-19 age range i think they’re supposed to be in the original movie/show (i think they’re younger in 92 actually but whatever) except les and sarah who are 12(almost) and 20, respectively. (jack’s 19, kat and david are 18, crutchie’s 17). with that said:

- almost everything’s gay. because i said so. jack “girls are nice, once or twice” kelly? straight? no. we stan a social justice bicon. he falls in love with kat but he is still bi as hell thanks. (kat is also bi. david and crutchie are both gay)

- david and katherine are BEST friends. david got a scholarship to the same fancy private boarding school kat attended so they’ve known each other since like seventh grade. they started a newspaper because the school didn’t have one and Kat was The Journalist Girl. bill and darcy round out their og boarding school squad, and there’s Some Stories to be told about the adventures of Boarding School Squad.

- speaking of adventures, jack and crutchie and the newsies. jack and crutchie met and subsequently adopted most of the newsies in high school except race who they met in middle school. just take a second and imagine a large group of high school boys. okay now that you’re done recoiling in horror they’re actually fairly well organized respectable boys, they just get rowdy sometimes.

- speaking of adopting newsies, medda is jack and crutchie’s mom. like actually, she adopted them for realsies. she taught drama at the high school so jack and crutchie and the newsies are Well Versed in the art of Theatre™️

- as are david and kat, mostly because kat had a crush on their drama teacher at school and low key forced to boys to go out for every show with her

- jack’s a slut for feelings (among other things). he’s the kind of bi who falls in love and is ready to propose the second a cute person looks at him. one time he tripped up the stairs while carrying paints for a set and ruined his shirt all because someone cute told him hi and smiled at him. he’s a disaster.

- jack graduated first with a couple of the older newsies and fucked off to santa fe for a while for art school and to like find himself and what not. he eventually wound up dropping out, and moving back to new york when crutchie graduated to move them both to an apartment closer to crutchie’s college.

- it’s an apartment au. of course it is. we’ve met me. when is it NOT an apartment au.

- everyone meets when katherine and david move into the same apartment building jack and crutchie and a number of other newsies live in. shenanigans Ensue, especially when jack “if i flirt loud enough they’ll think i have confidence” kelly realizes the cute new girl wants nothing to do with him which is Extremely his type.

- i’m just gonna copy paste this next part straight from the doc. “Jack goes mega heart eyes for Katherine immediately upon meeting her, is too busy being stupid for her to notice Crutchie and David falling in love. Crutchie and David fall in love so super hard like w o w there’s definitely at least one scene where all four of them are in the elevator and Kat and Jack are Loud Flirting and Crutchie and David catch each other’s eyes and do those soft lovestruck smiles boys do when they’re crushing hard it’s REAL GAY”

- also copy pasted: “Jack is fucking SMITTEN with Katherine even after they get together, he sends her cutesy memes on Snapchat and his lock screen is a picture of her and he gets kind of sulky if he goes too long without kissing her. Jack “his password is also Katherine?” Kelly. (Kat is equally smitten but much more low-key about it. She has a tendency to just like, pet his face and kiss his forehead and whatnot. they’re both very tactile it’s a lot of little touches and leaning on each other and being in each other’s space. They're in Love™. It's Gross.)” which honestly minus the modern tech parts is just canon.

- i can’t handle how over the moon they are for each other save me from this hell. that part in once and for all when she puts her hand on his chest and he grabs it and rubs his thumb over her fingers? uh bye i’m ascending. but this is about au not canon, so i digress.

- joe is still a Newspaper man except a lot of his Newspaper Man Stuff is online now? he’s leading the wave in anti-millennial editorials, and Jack, a millennial working at least two jobs, is Fed Up.

- that’s...most of the plot/backstory/major things i have so far, so here is some smaller more random tidbits to wrap this up:

- jack doesn’t meet kat and david until they move into the building, BUT he does know sarah from working part time at the same café as her. small world.

- jack is: a slut for lip products, he has soft and kissable lips at all time; the karaoke king, he owns at least one item of clothing proclaiming this; scared of spiders; can not dance. he’s so bad at dancing i can’t even make a grammatically correct statement about it.

- kat and david and bill and darcy all speak french. kat and david have a Lot of Feelings about A Lot of Things and routinely bring them up to each other just for the enjoyment of watching the other get Very Passionate about Whatever Thing (the victorian era? the romanovs? amelia earhart? censorship? linguistics? angel hair pasta? all of the above)

- jack and david are the mom and dad friends respectively. jack adamantly denies being the mom friend but he cares about everyone like they’re his own kids and he somehow has whatever anyone needs? And also he touches and hugs everyone all the time he’s a very comforting presence. once david warms up to everyone he becomes the kind of pushy dad friend who smacks you on the butt and loves to say “I told you so” and makes you get out of bed during a depression spell because he CARES about you or WHATEVER and it's GOOD FOR YOU or WHATEVER.

- Jack and David are the dad and mom friends but aren't dating because they're dating Kat and Crutchie who are feisty troublemakers under those sweet innocent exteriors (which is why they get away with so much because they’re cute and charming and smile like sunshine. Jack claims thats bullshit because he is cute and charming and smiles like sunshine also and he has never gotten away with ANYTHING in his LIFE but that's just cause he was raised by Medda who is Immune to the Jack Kelly Charm)

- david is useless re: pop culture. multiple people have multiple times shouted “LEARN A THING. WATCH A SHOW.” at him because he knows fucking encyclopedic facts about like, fuckin rattlesnakes and shit, and can quote multiple bill wurtz videos start to finish from memory, but fucking don't ask him about movies or anything because just. blank stares.

- The Forever argument at David and Kat’s apartment is is the room too hot or too cold? David thinks it is ALWAYS too cold and Kat thinks it is ALWAYS too hot and both are willing to die on that hill.

- the newsies have a sin tin, and the rules for paying the sin tin are convoluted as hell and involve a complicated voting system. the most frequent payers of the sin tin are jack and race who are tied, and crutchie has never had to pay because he is pure of heart and learned how to charm people from jack.

- les is a born con man in the best way, and david and sarah and katherine are all constantly shutting down get rich quick schemes that would probably work because les you’re an infant, stay in school and get a job in finance like the rest of the con men.

- Spot Conlon Is An Asshole, And Racetrack Higgins Is In Love With Him.

god okay that’s. a lot. most of it, not all of it. i made a few things more concise than they are in my official doc and left out a few of the much more nonsensical/just for mandy things but it’s been, uh, two years and i kind of just add a few things every week and haven’t put any effort at ALL into organizing it or giving it any plot. it’s just gonna live as a bunch of scattered shenanigans headcanons and six lines of fic forever, which is probably for the best.