#also next season i get to see elliot my good and sexy friend elliot

[july-19th-club]

the umbrella academy is a lot of things as a show, some of them good, some of them medicore, some of them just plain music videos with a little bit of plot, but what it is no matter what else is going on is the adventure of one man with a very thick british-rust-belt accent trying his absolute damndest to sound american

[sarking]

I was tagged by @catelyngrant and I'm gonna tag @winged-mammal, @momentia, @naryrising, and anyone else who wants to do it.

last song: Lovecraft in Brooklyn by The Mountain Goats, which I had to listen to three times because I was immediately obsessed with how it fits Itchy Trigger Finger (L&O: SVU, EO, zombies) by snarkypants.

last show/series: Hmm. Probably The Babysitters Club. I didn't really want to watch the one where Mimi dies, so it took a while to get to. I also watched all of Oz except for the final episode because, hey, again with the character death.

currently watching: I'm trying to finish Derry Girls so I can cancel my Netflix subscription, but I'm also debating if I want to finish season two of Lupin, which is very good, but which requires use of my brain because it's in French. And there's SVU and Organized Crime, of course. And Major Crimes reruns on Saturday night/Sunday morning, but we're coming up on the episodes we don't watch.

favorite color: Yellow.

sweet, spicy, or savory: Sweet and spicy together.

currently reading: I bought Bone in the Throat by Anthony Bourdain a few months ago and read a couple chapters a few weeks ago. I was very impressed by the dialogue! I will now proceed to say this is what I'm reading for the next 3-5 years, at which point I will buy another book and do the same. I do slightly better with nonfiction.

what i'm working on: looool. I've got a contrarian bug up my ass, so last night I was like, "Yeah, yeah, EO breeding kink, but hear me out: it's Liv with a strap-on," so I've been trying to figure out exactly how that starts and whose point of view it is. But other than that:

a wonder for gods and mortal men, which was supposed to be a sexy little romp where Elliot and Olivia and Frank Donnelly played strip poker and she talked her way into the Brotherhood. Except it turns out it's an angsty thing about how Frank knows more about the past ten years of Olivia's life than Elliot does. ("We'd take care of a guy like that."//"I took care of him."//"I'm just saying, it's -- that? That's what brothers are for.")

Painted-White Unknown, wherein Elliot gets divorced, falls in love with the kitchen in an apartment he can't afford, and puppy-dog-eyes Olivia into being roommates, and I get stuck on important questions like, "Who is the first to have a wank?" and, "How the fuck am I supposed to figure out what order these things I want to write about happen in?" (Elizabeth bounces on the balls of her feet while he unlocks the apartment door, talking a mile a minute about a friend whose father lives in Midtown, in an apartment with a balcony inside a building with a concierge, and Elliot doesn't know what he was thinking, wishes Liv had told him to grow up and man up and go the hell back to Queens, where maybe he'd failed at being a husband, but he could at least salvage his dignity as a father.)

Polynices is Home from the Hunt, which cranks the daddy issues and season eight codependency up to eleven when the kinship analysis of Olivia's DNA reveals her father is... Joseph Stabler. (For a few short hours, she was his, bound to him from birth, their connection a documented, scientific truth. But he won't stop her from destroying the proof; he'll add the truth to the list of secrets he keeps for her.)

Rocks and Water, the one where Elliot and Olivia are just about dating when Olivia realizes she's pregnant from a one-night stand, and Elliot doesn't see the problem with this, but I have problems with him. Because, look, I need him to not take no for an answer. It is canon that he does not take no for an answer -- how many god damn times is he going to ask Liv out? -- but I cannot reconcile that with him being a god damn SVU detective in a way that allows me to get into his head enough to write one particular sentence that I've been stuck on for like six months. (It takes everything in him to step back. To pull his hand away from her stomach, not knowing if she'll ever let him touch her like that again.)

Chicago Is So 25 Years Ago, the SVU band AU that would probably just be better as a notfic, but I can't get it out of my head. (Her mother is addicted to the hot rush of cocaine. Olivia understands it when she's here, like this, arms overhead and audience screaming for another shimmy of her hips.)

currently obsessed with: I'm going through a bit of a houseplant thing, which is unfortunate for the poor plants that are going to die. Am I overwatering? Underwatering? Is there too much light? Not enough? When will Hammie stop digging them up? (Too much light was my last problem, which is hard to believe.)

[tmtica]

LOSER LIKE ME, aka jordan joins the new directions

so essentially this is mostly for fun but also a reference point for my glee au that I only write with like 3 people in but I’m pretty much married to at this point. I’ve organized the majority of this playlist in order of what jordan tackles in the glee club for the weekly assignments + the in-between numbers she folds into her repertoire for fun / for assignments that we never saw in the show but could easily exist.

SEASON 2

episode 1, audition:     mustang sally, wilson pickett

I know roderick auditions with the same song in season 6 but here at traumantic productions I do whatever I want and I want jordan to pull off an unexpected audition song that secures her place among the underdogs within new directions, thank you.

episode 2, britney/brittany:     what u see (is what u get), britney spears

it’s one of jordan’s favorite britney songs and speaks to how she’s determined to stay true to who she is no matter what peoples’ perceptions of her is (even though she’s still young and finding herself)

episode 4, duets:     you really got me, the kinks/cherry bomb, the runaways

pre-determined mash-up for the breadstix dinner for two duet competition with @nostlgic‘s john bender; it’s like pulling teeth at first but eventually the two end up seeing eye to eye and pull off a performance with jordan rocking the electric guitar and channeling her inner joan jett; they don’t win but they do a damn good job regardless.

episode 7, the substitute:     crushcrushcrush, paramore

holly holiday said the glee kids can do whatever the hell they want and jordan wants to do more pop punk. also, any excuse to bust out the guitar is a good one.

episode 8, furt:     stand by me, ben e. king

one of jordan’s favorite love songs and one she pulls out for carol and burt’s wedding.

episode 12, silly love songs:     take a chance on me, abba

jordan (and this totally isn’t me projecting) really wanted to tackle abba for the “sing love songs for valentine’s week” assignment, so what?

episode 15, sexy:     froot, marina and the diamonds

I know this song came out in 2015 and the episode aired in 2011 but this would be the least terrible infraction the show has ever had with continuity, also it’s a banger of a song, also I already know the staging goes from jordan starting out singing in the choir room for the assignment and by the chorus shifts to her singing in the auditorium in full old hollywood glam, as it should be. I’m a genius, thank you.

episode 17, a night of neglect:     kiss me fool, fefe dobson

I fell down a rabbit hole of music I listened to in middle school and fefe dobson is severely underappreciated and neglected as an artist, and kiss me fool is the perfect combo of soulful and rock that captures jordan’s taste in music. she’ll shred through the hecklers..... until sue unplugs her amp/the mic/something to that effect.

episode 19, rumours:     the chain, fleetwood mac

I picked a song off the album that wasn’t covered in the episode since it has to be rumors-specific but hey...... this actually works really well.

episode 20, prom queen:     i want you to want me, letters from cleo; DONTTRUSTME, 3OH!3

jordan performs two songs (possibly more) for the prom; i want you to want me is a duet with @nostlgic‘s john bender once again, and she pulls out DONTTRUSTME because it’s a great party song.

SEASON 3

episode 1, the purple piano project:     trouble, p!nk

jordan wanted to do more p!nk and figured this would be a good recruitment song for the glee club, to showcase the different music they do

episode 3, asian f:     fame, irene cara

her audition song for the musical; she’s going for anita and rightfully gets stomped out of the running by santana (I will never stop simping for santana) but she enjoys being one of the shark girls all the same.

episode 7, i kissed a girl:     nineteen, tegan and sara

it’s the gayest song I could think of that would be in jordan’s wheelhouse. I’m doing this for the lesbians.

episode 10, yes/no:     your song, elton john

I know ryder covers this later but once again I do not care. it’s another favorite love song of jordan’s and one she would present to mr. schue for his proposal to emma.

episode 11, michael:     the way you make me feel, michael jackson

michael jackson tribute week? she’s bringing the energy, the vocals, and the dance moves, as she should. also she’s ready to kill sebastian but that’s beside the point.

episode 12, the spanish teacher:     como la flor, selena

yes I am biased but also how the fuck can you do a week dedicated to latin artists and not cover the queen of tejano? enter: jordan. everyone say thank you.

episode 13, heart:     fall to pieces, avril lavigne

love song themed episodes = more favorite love songs from jordan, this one being a more alternative/pop punk one. who doesn’t love old school avril?

episode 16, saturday night glee-ver:     she works hard for the money, donna summer

this isn’t on the saturday night fever album but donna summer is the queen of disco in jordan’s opinion and she, like me, does what she wants.

episode 19, prom-asaurus:     heart of glass, blondie; tell it to my heart, taylor dayne

I might change this/add more but jordan went through an 80s mood that month and just felt like the two above would be solid for prom (and she’s right!).

episode 22, goodbye:     don’t you (forget about me), the simple minds

yes this was covered in later seasons but I do not care it’s iconic and she’s gonna sing this to the seniors come hell or high water.

SEASON 4

episode 2, britney 2.0:     what it’s like to be me, britney spears

another empowering britney song for britney week, take two. pretty much same deal as before.

episode 7, dynamic duets:     SOS, ABBA; you don’t mess around with jim, jim cocre

this episode was superhero themed with the duets and I think both songs fit the theme and are also in jordan’s reach; she probably picks ABBA but that could change.

episode 11, sadie hawkins:     still into you, paramore

once again this is specific to @nostlgic‘s john bender but in general...... such a good love song. I guarantee you if you sing this at your crush they will instantly fall in love with you.

episode 12, naked:     maneater, nelly furtado

truthfully I can’t remember why I thought this would fit into the episode theme but once again, I do what I want and so does jordan.

episode 13, diva:     if i could turn back time, cher

I realize that the network probably couldn’t afford the royalties to cover cher’s music but is that gonna stop me from proclaiming that jordan does exactly that during diva week? of course not.

episode 14, i do:     everywhere, michelle branch

this doesn’t fit the rest of the episode so this is probably gonna change but hey, michelle branch is underrated and I’m doing everyone a favor here.

episode 16, feud:     1, 2 step, ciara ft. missy elliot/disturbia, rihanna

ciara and rihanna had a very brief feud that mostly happened on twitter and was resolved with little drama but since the episode is about doing music/mashups incorporating two artists with beef, this works. and it’ll fucking slap.

episode 17, guilty pleasures:     before he cheats, carrie underwood

did you know jordan actually really loves country music? well, now you do.

episode 19, sweet dreams:     sweet dreams, eurythmics

the assignment was about dreams and jordan decided to slack off that week with the music. she still pulls it off. will schuester is probably still a dick.

episode 20, lights out:     edge of seventeen, stevie nicks

power goes out at mckinley and the glee club is challenged to perform music stripped down and acoustic; could you imagine how hard an acoustic version of edge of seventeen would be? you’re welcome.

episode 21, wonder-ful:     sir duke, stevie wonder

it’s a stevie wonder tribute episode and you best believe jordan’s doing his best (my opinion) song

SEASON 5

episode 1, love, love, love:     it won’t be long, the beatles

beatles tribute episode 1/2; it’s a song they didn’t cover and one she could handle. also it’s just a good song.

episode 2, tina in the sky with diamonds:     can’t buy me love, the beatles

same as above, performed at prom, most likely with help from fellow glee-clubbers. she might even don a suit for the performance. she’s absolutely playing guitar.

episode 7, puppet master:     since u been gone, kelly clarkson

from what I remember, the glee club is just going through ideas of what they could do for a setlist for their next competition and jordan would prepare this banger for consideration

episode 9, frienemies:     cruel summer, bananarama

I honestly can’t remember this episode beyond the rachel/santana stuff but it’s a good song, let her do it

episode 10, trio:     follow me, uncle kracker

see previous

episode 12, 100:     how will i know, whitney houston

the aforementioned song was such a good cover in glee and one of the new directions performances jordan would absolutely want to revisit.

episode 14, new new york:     dancing in the street, martha reeves & the vandellas

I just think this number would be fun to see with jordan exploring the city with her friends in NYC and with literal dancing in the street (because that totally happens in new york without motorists getting pissed)

[valkerymillenia]

Umbrella Academy

season 2, episode 3

Next!

Again, live blogging and posting my reactions all in one post to avoid spamming.

This post got accidentally deleted yesterday so I had to write or all again (twice!)

Oh, starting with a Klaus and Ben 1960 flashback! Ah, Klaus... You have no shame. Let my baby eat though!

Lol "Chanel". Boy knows his fashion, of course.

And there's Boney M playing!

You can practically read his mind when he sees that diamond. Sugar momma alert! 😆

Damn, loving the black outfit, very sexy.

LEVITATING KLAUS WAS BEN LIFTING HIM UP! Seems that one crack theory on the fandom was right 🤣

Ben's face though 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

These two are the best combo. I love them.

61, Baja, NM. Traveling hippie commune.

Is Klaus still sober? He refuses a joint here so I'm inclined to believe that he is but he isn't acting very sober... Then again that might be an act, just him embracing the hippy life.

CALLED IT!!! BEN FALLS IN LOVE, DOESN'T HE?! I FUCKING CALLED IT IN EP 1!

62, Varanasi, India. The river scene from the promos. Yeah, I called this one too. Klaus is already looking seriously uncomfortable and realizing this is getting out of hand.

63, San Francisco. Poor Klaus is practically suffocating under all the touching and nobody respects his space or his words.

Destiny's Children! 🤣 You are such a 90s kid, Klaus.

Run away, Klaus! Run! Escape the crazies.

Ok, let me paused to write out a thought...

So a lot of people were worried about the cult thing and Klaus's intentions but it's clear he had no malicious intentions at all. He charmed and impressed some people for survival purposes and thrived, he enjoyed the love and attention at first and the cult just grew around around him organically whether he liked it or not, more a hippy cult of personality then a religious sect, but at some point he saw that it had gone too far, the pressure and expectation became too much and he realized he'd bitten more than he can chew.

It's actually rather sad how he just wants to escape but the cultists objectify him to all hell, he has no privacy or personal space. The problem with Klaus is that he doesn't do anything mildly, he always goes too big until he's drowning. Boy is already self-sabotaging and I'm sure he's going to start self-destructing very soon as well.

End of thought. Clicking play again.

Ouch! Poor Diego 😰 Lila, that is not how you cauterize a stab wound...

"what happened?" -your dear daddy stabbed you, dude.

Did she really need to strip him so thoroughly? 😏 Yes, yes, she did.

Well, at least she's not sewing you up, Diego. No needles, yay.

"oh, he isn't dead." "Disappointed?" "To see you? Always 😊" -did I mention I love Five's sass? I did? Well, I do.

Old family friend 😆

"you don't untie him?" "Was I supposed to?" Oh Lila, you're adorable, poor Elliot.

Vanya, that is suspicious as hell, just mow down that weirdo!

Ok, good instincts but too slow.

Run, girl, run!

Got to admit, these Swedes are good battle strategy, they are surrounding her surprisingly well.

Is this were the badass Vanya promo was from? Show me badass Vanya, please.

BADASS VANYA! 💖

Ooooooh, very smart, Five!!!

One of the machines though? What are the others for? I'm curious.

Plano Street Rooming House for Solitary Men? That's real depressing, Luther.

It's the "the end is nigh" guy the same that was screaming with Luther in ep 1?

King Kong! Not sure if cute or rude af...

Ahahahah! Luther literally STUMBLING on "Allison" and then acting like an awkward Steve Rogers when the kids call him out 😆 Boy, when will you realize that your obsession is creepy?

Honestly, ALL the Hargreeves siblings can be divided into two categories- sweet awkward dork or sass king/queen, there is no in-between (but Diego and Klaus get to be both).

Convenient that Vanya would just sit there and wait to be found by Five but ok.

"I have a brother?" -honey, you have five (pun fully intended)

IKEA MAFIA! 😂

Nice crop circle, Vanya.

Five just rolls with the amnesia, huh? Doesn't even question it. Ok, then.

Why is Ruby, notorious mobster, sewing sequins? It's it for the dog? I bet, it's for the dog.

"Hargreeves. She your ex?" *Cue Luther's super awkward fumbling* "S-Sorta...Y-Yeah. Sure." - big boy, this is the point where you realize how creepy your crush on your own sister is, time to reevaluate.

KLAUS AND ALLISON REUNION! THEY ARE SO CUTE! 😭💜

Honestly, I need more Klaus and Allison interactions. They have so much bff potential.

*le gasp* "oh, you're married?" 😲 -yes, Klaus, you met him.

"dicks, drugs, debutants. My holy trinity" -ok so everything Klaus says should be taken with a grain of salt but does Klaus still do drugs or not? Considering the evolution of his powers with Ben I'd say no, but we aren't seeing other ghosts harassing him so... Hmm, I need confirmation.

"alternative spiritual community" my ass

Ah, Allison falls into the sass queen category.

Allison can have a little PTSD, as a treat. 😢

Those shoes! Hi, Handler.

Those shoes really are her signature by now. Those heels could kill a man.

Handler as a brunette...? She looks good but I like her bleach blonde.

What did she say to make that boy pee himself?? Damn, Handler, no wonder your kid is a mess.

These dudes need to start listening to my girl Allison, instead of following her husband like puppies.

Great speech, girl! ✊

What is up with that sandwich???

Oh wait, it's Ben right? Klaus is using his powers to get Ray out of jail, isn't he?

Yup, of course he is.

Ben being all sassy and cocky about it gives me life.

"high places" - 😆

Poor Ray, you have no idea what you've gotten yourself into.

"family barbecues are about to get reeeeeeeal weird" - I'd actually like to see that.

"leave the pot, dear" - you're such an old man, Five.

"any questions?" Five, if be worried if she DIDN'T have questions after all that.

"asteroid impact" -aww 💜 you really do care for her feelings, Five... But you have to tell her the truth sooner or later.

Harlan likes classical music, huh? Good thing he knows a good violinist.

Harlan and Sissy... 😭 My poor heart.

Ouch! What is wrong with you, Lila? You're right but what is wrong with you?

"I can't believe I got shanked by my own father" - can't you, Diego? Really? After everything else that man did to you and your siblings?

"man to man, that son of bitch wouldn't stand a chance" - yeah, he would, he taught you all you know, boy

Not sure if Lila's story is true or not but... I still have that one theory that she was born on October, 1989...

"I don't understand you!!!" - ahah, poor Diego 🤣

Really? Right in front of Elliot's tuna mold?

Man, Handler is really obsessed with Five...

Oh, Luther, you giant puppy...

This is so AWKWARD!

Bonbons, Luther? Really?

Ok, this small talk is even MORE AWKWARD! It physically hurts to listen to this.

The pain in his face and voice when Luther goes "S-so great" 😭

boy, this is the moment you realize it's time to move on, you're not isolated teenagers in a dysfunctional home anymore, let her be your sister and find love elsewhere.

The sit in!

"seven languages" sassy, sassy, I love her.

YOUNG DAVE!

Oh no... Klaus, no, baby... Oh, this is painful.

Ben, don't be mean, let your brothe have this.

What kind of gay man doesn't know what eggshell is? 😆

"is this considered stalking? 'cause I think you're stalking now" - well, BEN, following your brother 24/7 for 15 years can also be considered stalking

Oh no, Vietnam flashbacks... Poor Klaus 😭😭😭

"Vietnam fling"? Ben, you know it wasn't just a fling! Stop being mean.

Aw, Klaus just wants to save Dave... He's willing to sacrifice their relationship to save Dave's life... 😭😭😭

I know Ben is just worried but he could be less mean...

Damn, this sit in thing is really upsetting...

Why is Ray being weird? Is he suspicious of Luther and Alison's relationship? Or is he just unhappy that Allison kept secrets about her family?

Oh Luther, no... Self-harm by proxy is not going to make you feel better.

Oh, motherfucker! That coffee thing was such an asshole move!

Shit, this scene is so well written, the way something so small is making the whole protest escalate to all hell... The police brutality, the parallels with recent events... Disturbing and brilliant and deeply relevant!

Yes! Rumor that motherfucker, Allison!

Oh no, don't be scared of your wife, Ray! Don't be suspicious!

Poor Allison... 😢

Oh Luther, you dumbass... 😢

Lila going to meet mommy, huh?

Oh, she's still wearing Diego's bracelet. Cute.

I know this scene between Handler and Lila was supposed to be a shocking plot twist but after David Castañeda's interview slip up, I already knew.

Still, an excellent scene and very cool surprise.

Like I said before, I really like Lila, I don't trust her AT ALL but I like her.

...

THIS WAS SUCH AN EMOTIONAL EPISODE... Again.

My god, this show gives me life.

[missjackil]

Sam, Dean & Sera Gamble

It’s been my feeling since I watched Seasons 6 and 7 that they were different than all other seasons. I didn’t hate them, but I didn’t necessarilly like them either. They were Sera Gamble’s era, and though Im sure it’s hard to stay true to Kripke’s vision, and yet add your own vision to it, I don’t think she did a very good job. I was speaking with a friend recently, who told me it’s a common opinion that Gamble was a Sam girl, the last show runner to “take care” of Sam’s character, and the last one to understand the brothers’ relationship. I nearly spit my coffee on my laptop! Now, this isnt to wank on my friend, I wont name her, but she’ll know who she is if she reads this. She’s a sweety and I respect her, so friend.... this isnt against you :)  Now me, personally, I do tend to see things completely opposite of how most of the fandom sees it, I dont know why that is, but I do. This time is no different, because Im going to go outside the box and explain why I think Gamble was a Dean girl, and maybe even secretly hated Sam. I dont know why she got fired, if any of you do, please enlighten me, because it would seem to me that she got fired for favoring Dean too much and nearly destroying Sam’s character, and Im going to explain why. 

To start, she wasn’t the head hancho yet in S4, but she was the one who insisted that Sam sleep with Ruby and Dean sleep with Anna. Now I understand how intriguing it was to think of one brother sleeps with a demon while the other sleeps with an angel, but if you read these conditions in a fan fic, youd scream “Dean girl!” and complain about the Sam hate in the fact that Sam slept not only with a demon, but with a dead meat suit, while Dean’s angel conveniently had her own body and not someone elses vessle.   Anyone who wasnt a Sam fan before hand, certainly didnt become one after that. Now I know it was hard to redeem Sam after the events of S4, and I wont blame Gamble for that completely, but the end of S5 brought back the brave, sweet, selfless Sam we know and love. The one who only wants to do the right thing, has unlimited love and faith in Dean, is willing to take responsibility of his actions, will give up his life to save the world, and the love for his brother is strong enough to overpower the Devil himself.<sniff> but Gamble got the show for season 6 and what happened? The very first thing, is reward Sam’s courageous act of S5 with coming back soulless. And for a while. at least 5 episodes, all that meant was Sam was Sam minus his good qualities. His compassion, kindness, and love for Dean. Sure, Soulless Sam was sexy and funnier than normal Sam, but for the most part, he was just cold. Again, if you werent a Sam fan up till now, you werent becoming one during this arc. The arc itself, though it seemed to be about Sam, was really about Dean and his reaction to Soulless Sam. What it did to him, how Sam let a vamp turn him, how Dean hated being in the same room with him and very little about how it affected Sam other than for him to say he doesnt care about anything, even about Dean, which made us all hurt for Dean, not Sam.  One of the biggest traits in the WInchester bromance, is that Sam and Dean will go over and above the call of duty for each other, and are self destructively co dependent, and yet the only time in s6 and 7 that Gamble showed this was when Dean went to get Sam’s soul back and died to talk to Death. We see Dean laying his life down for Sam, because he loves him so much, meanwhile.Sam is trying to kill Bobby. Still not winning Sam fans here. Also Sam was trying to kill Bobby to make it impossible to get his soul back, because he was afraid of what would happen to him, which is inconsistant with being soulless, because Soulless Sam (and other soulless people) had no fear, so to me it looks like a plot device  to keep Sam unlikable, it had even been stated by Bobby, that Dean was his favorite, not something a “Sam girl” would put in the mouth of the man Sam loves as a father, is it? Then Sam gets his soul back and with all the talk about how much damage it could do, one would think Sam would be the focus of s6b but he wasnt really, not even in the episode that he got his soul back. We did get an awesome bro hug then, and Im thankful, but the episode turned quickly to a filler/monster hunt, that pushed Sam to the side while Dean went to get that dragon killing sword and do a little physical comedy.  After that, we got a couple hell visions, but no real bromance or happiness that Dean had Sam back, it was just business as usual. We had a lot of comedy though with French Mistake, Fronteir Land, The Heart Will Go On, and Mommy Dearest. Keep in mind we have Dean looking all sexy in his cowboy outfit, and Sam just dresses like Sam with a cowboy hat. Clear signs of a Dean girl Season 6 wraps up with 3 episodes, The Man who Would Be King, that is very Cas heavy even though he’s a side character. He doesnt share this story with Sam or Dean, they just support it. Let it Bleed, which is Dean heavy, Sam isnt in much of it, and Cas is in even less. It’s primarily all Dean, Lisa and Ben, and then The Man Who Knew Too Much, which is actually one of my favorites, Its Sam heavy-ish, even though his hell wall just collapsed, and a fantastic story is unfolding, but he has to share the episode with Cas’s story independent of his own. and of course, Dean has things going on with Bobby. This is not a sign of a Sam girl.

 In the real SPN world, Dean would have stood down with the threat that Sam wouldnt be fixed if he didnt. As we saw him easily give up Anna for Sam, and how he let Lucifer/Sam beat the crap out of him just to keep Sam above ground and give him time to take over. Dean didnt even have a plan to that could help Cas’s problem, but he was willing to let Sam suffer and maybe die, just to stop Cas’s plan that he had no idea if it would fail or not? That’s definitely not “understanding the brothers’ relationship”  Now we move on to S7. The first 2 episodes are pretty heavy for Sam. It looks like he might get a good solid storyline this season. But what does a Sam girl think will help the already painful flood of Hell memories? I know, lets highly imply that Sam was raped by Lucifer!!! YEAH!! This goes great in a show that only gets a pg14 raiting, that emphisizes in love and family. it really NEEDS to have a lead hero raped by the devil for 180 years! How about we also add insult to injury and make Lucifer charming and humorous so the audience will like him! Not like Alistaire that the audience couldnt wait to kill.  I had hoped for the return of the Winchester bromance when Hello Cruel World had some wonderful moments of it. Dean waking Sam for breakfast, and tending to his hand wound, and listening to him about the hallucinations. The scene in the warehouse where Dean showed Sam to press on his wound to keep focus on whats real was one of the best bromantic moments of the series, and then Dean panicking with Sam unconscious in the ambulance. But it was sadly short lived. The next episode is mainly taking place weeks later, Sams issues are touched on for a minute, but he goes out on a hunt by himself, which pisses off Dean who still has a broken leg and cant drive.

 And then Leviathans, and DIck Roman and Samgirl Gamble for some reason thinks it would be such a riot for Sam who has been hallucinating Lucifer and the cage, to get roofied, married, and tied up naked by a stalker fan!! WTF????? And then Bobby dies, and then Sam gets kidnapped by Vetalla for 3 days while Dean was sleeping, and while Sam is bleeding out, Dean is trying to be friends with an annoying teenage girl. and then Dean gets to travel back in time and look smokin hot while he hangs out with Elliot Ness, then Dean fathers a monster daughter, and Sam kills her, and LETS CHASE SAM AROUND WITH CLOWNS!!! Oh wait, is he still having hellucinations? Hmmm I forget, and this is about the time I think Gamble had gotten fired because I have no idea what she was thinking to this point.  Sam’s hallucinations had been put on the back burner so much that I wonder if her intentions were to keep him in that state for a long time. To maybe throw into the mix every now and then, that Sam isnt stable. so he might not be strong enough to handle this thing, or he might not be in his right mind, so Dean will REALLY be the main hero and the most credible of the 2. Because Dean even used Sam’s mental state as a reason why he lied to him about Amy, and Sam just accepted it.  Repoman brought Sam’s hallucinations back to the surface, and i think Carver may have taken over by then because Sam was frantic to find his kidnapped brother, much more than Dean was to find his a few episodes before. Carver had to have been back by The Born Again Identity because Cas came back. I wont say I like the way Sam’s mental health was handled, it was just over by Cas taking on the pain, but at least it got attention and SOME form of closure.  Now Carver isnt without some pretty epic sins, but he definitely wasnt afraid of bromance, and the Winchester co-dependency. I wonder if Gamble gets such support simply because she is a female and women tend to want to support women in business full of men, and I understand that, but Ill still call out the woman if she does a crap job, which I really think she did in this case. She did a better job at taking care of Dean than Sam, and she did nothing to help their relationship. 

[justanotherdumpingground]

Chapter Reviews: April 23-27, 2019

Wishful Thinking Chapter 3:

So far, it's mildly enjoyable. I enjoy investigating Tilly and finding out that she has kept a menagerie of animals after getting mixed up with animal traffickers. Pity I couldn't adopt her cat Jinx because I'd love to see the MC hear an animal's thoughts on a regular basis.

Still miffed at the MC's dad for doubting his daughter's capabilities. I get that he's concerned for her, but because she's an adult, he's practically hindering her from reaching her full potential. I mean, she just became junior reporter after that moment with Tilly, so he shouldn't be worried.

Anyway, let's see how Jaime reacts to the MC having the ability to read minds.

High School Story: Class Act Chapter 11:

Why didn't MC and Skye use their phones to record footage of Lorenzo and Amber talking about how they staged Lorenzo's heroic act? That would've saved them the effort to expose Lorenzo for the fraud he is. I guess they aren't crazy prepared after all.

So Danielle's back and suggesting that Rory kidnap the kitten. That's just too risky and dumb. To be honest, I consider her neutralized instead of redeemed, but then again, she had Amber fund the play just for Rory's sake. It was stupid of Rory to nearly consider that offer as well.

Honestly, how dumb is Lorenzo? Campaigning to divert all school resources to throwing parties not only shows skewed priorities in his part, but also comes across as a moot point. After all, the school staff will just nullify his platform if he wins. What made me cringe is that these students act like the student council is more powerful than the principal and teachers. Even worse is when Myra dropped out from the running after receiving a shirt from Lorenzo.

Man, it's so awesome to see Skye urging Rory and the twin to cooperate together. Seriously, I've had enough of this election drama, especially when the most popular candidate will ruin the school. Even worse is that it ruins the purpose of this reboot, which contains the words "Class Act", yet there's no focus on preparing for a play aside from Rory's campaign to strengthen the arts.

Across the Void Chapter 19:

Wow! That was an intense chapter that really captured my entire interest. Evading the Void's patrols through disguise and then destroying their ships was awesome, to say the least. Now it's just up to the MC and the Atlas crew to put a stop to the Void.

Man, Quandry is one walking nightmare. The way he behaves and tortures Zekei scares me so much. I thought he might go after Aquari because she's a minor character, but going after Deimos? Man, that's just scary. I spent diamonds to save her life, mainly because she's growing on me. Nevertheless, it's well done, and I just can't help but praise the writers for punching my guts in this scene by aiming for a character growing on me.

America's Most Eligible Chapter 15:

This is it, huh? Honestly, I'm disappointed at Pixelberry's mishandling of this story by not making relationships affect dialogue. I get that it means spending more time and resources and putting more effort, but considering Pixelberry's history of mismanagement, can't say I'm surprised.

Still miffed that I have to pay diamonds to get Eden and Kiana together. Why can't you do this on your own, Eden? As much as I like her and Kiana, their lack of free will just makes me question the credibility of the diamonds and keys system.

Picking the flirty choices during the quiz on how much I know my partner is fun, especially when Ivy complains about how my MC turns everything into a speech about how sexy and gorgeous he is. It was the only part of the story that I enjoy, though I also can't wait for this book to end.

Nightbound Chapters 1-2:

This is off to a good start so far. I cringed a little when the male MC faces were recycled from TE because they look too young for a 25 year old, but the story's setup makes up for it. I was scared when Kristin got attacked by a bloodwraith that is magnificently terrifying. And the encounter with supernatural beings like Vera got me curious on the setting even more. I like Garrus, Krom, and Ivy so far, and I hope to see more of them as the series progresses.

I picked Face 3 for Nik, and he looks good. I still find him rather fishy because of him not saying much about his job as a hunter. Anyway, let's see how this goes, and it better not disappoint me.

Passport to Romance Chapter 7:

On one hand, it's true Ahmed's coach is a jerk, but on the other hand, could he actually go to the nearest airport and fly himself and his friends to Berlin? That would've saved precious time. Honestly, this stop at Lucerne comes across as a mere ploy to add more screen time for Elliot just because the creators love giving details on him for free while paywalling others. It's a disingenuous self-fulfilling prophecy that drives all kinds of players other than the ones you're targeting away.

Speaking of Elliot, on one hand, I feel bad that he's struggling to get through the grief of losing his parents last year. Nevertheless, my opinion of him is still the same because while it explains his objection to Ahmed and Sumire making jokes at the catacombs, he still has yet to decide whether to improve or worsen, and it has to be done in a logical way. Not to mention that he has no excuse because of his status as the writer's favorite.

Honestly, what is wrong with this MC? Forgetting to ask your friends for their last names is one thing, but snooping on their private stuff without asking for their permission is a whole another level. They should've asked Elliot for permission first, but no. Let's just invade his privacy and rummage through his stuff. In the meantime, I'm amused to see that Bartholomew Chambers's face has been recycled for Elliot's brother.

Open Heart Chapter 11:

Wow! This chapter is intense. First Dr. Banerji coughs blood, a sign that his life hangs in the balance. Next, Mrs. Martinez says she wanted to travel but couldn't because of her Rhodes disease. Finally, Kyra reveals that her cancer's back and initially decides to just ditch chemo because she thought her cancer will come back anyway. I admire the MC's determination to treat their patients and do whatever it takes to get them better, and the team work their friends.

One thing that I'm still curious about is when will the investigation on the saboteur resume. Between the patients and Panacea Labs's shadiness, that might be the reason why it's on the sidelines.

I'm proud of Kyra's ultimate decision to go through chemo and not give up any hope for survival. That's the spirit. Definitely have a huge respect for her.

Ride or Die Chapter 15:

I finally caved in and spent diamonds on having my MC reconcile with her dad. Well, the dad still believed that the MC must answer for what she has done, regardless of whether I picked the premium option, but I'm still glad they have one last talk before she goes out to get back on Shaw.

The driving sequence was pretty intense, and I was nervous that the MC might end up at a disadvantage. It seemed like that at first, but I was impressed at her laying a trap for the Brotherhood with Toby and Ximena's help. Still keeping an eye on Mona and what she'll do.

For the very first time, I'm actually excited to see what will happen next. It doesn't mean I like this story, but at least it does grab my attention that I'm excited for what will happen next.

The Elementalists Chapter 7:

This story continues to be the highlight of my Saturdays (I'm more than half a day ahead from where I'm at :P). First, I'm worried for Atlas and their outbursts for anger and hope they get help as soon as possible. Second of all, the MC and Atlas attuned to all elements was a huge curveball. I thought my MC's personality will change from being like an Air-att, but it was a relief that it won't change. Third, I messed up with Alma training my MC to prevent themselves from suffocation. Kane's method of suffocating air out of people's lungs reminds me of Avatar: The Legend of Korra, specifically the third season big bad Zaheer using his airbending to kill by bending air from one's lungs.

Lake Tempetua looks so beautiful I hope to see it again in a future chapter. It was also fun to see my MC and their friends having fun during the party. Not to mention that I had my MC kiss Cyran because I'm still trying to figure out who my MC will date. Now that I finally get to encounter merfolk, I'm wondering whether there's at least one non-human race that corresponds to a certain element. I might be wrong, though.

Wood nymphs=wood

Djinn=moon

Merfolk=water

Satyr=?

The scene where the MC attacks Atlas shocked and horrified me. I was certain that the choice I picked was the mildest, only for the MC to severely injure their twin. Talking about a curveball on my part. I'm becoming even more worried at what might happen and when Kane will strike back.

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW6

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week.

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

N/A

I don't want to talk about it. Just kidding - I'd love to talk about my tormented soul. I ran through so many different scenarios but in the end I have opted to just save and do nothing. Two frees will be nice next week, and, I have a loose plan in mind on how to migrate to a dedicated 433 and shift some money around. No City has my asshole all the way up my asshole but fucking fuck it. Everyone was shitting themselves without Kane last week for the "home banker" and we see how that turned out. Blah. I don't have any of the new sexy boys that all the cool kids are jerking in but I still have good guys, right? Fuck me.

GK:

Elliot gets his first start for me over Foster. Not really a close one here looking at the fixtures and however much I have found rotating keepers an unsuccessful strategy, since they often get save points against the top teams with the odd surprise clean and hauls missed, I'm going to play the fixture here. Hughton has Brighton properly shackled so hoping for a clean for Prosciutto Face Bob

DEF:

Throwing out 4 of these fucks this weekend.

Bavies looks like he will be back in his usual spot so he's an auto. I still think he's the best defender in the game on balance.

Phil Jones another auto set and forget who looks great. Little bit shit that he wasn't going up for corners last weekend and also shit that he isn't on corners anymore (LVG we miss you) but still a bap monster although his actual bonus points have not yet come in due to them scoring 4 every game - but he's consistently top or second from defenders on clean sheet games so they are coming.

Naughton welcomes Watford at home and I'm a little bit iffy on this clean shout. I'd be surprised if it comes in but it's still an on paper good fixture so I'll roll with it. Think Clement needs to try to start opening it up a little bit more at home against sides like these and score some goals which may leave them a little bit more prone to be hit on the counter.

Finally, SWard gets another start for me with a fantastic looking home fixture against Huddy. Feeling good here. Think they'll handle them.

MID:

Salah and Eriksen are two great friends who look great. Hard to see myself losing either anytime soon barring injury. Spurs haven't looked electric but Eriksen should still just be a steady stream. I still feel he's a great hold.

Third lad to round out my midfield this weekend is Brady. Save those direct free stonkers for the Prem please lad. Feel very nice with Brady for a while. Not a tremendous goal threat but with indirect set pieces and the quality he has on direct frees should see him through as a solid fantasy asset. Thank god FPL got it right and gave him that assist last weekend. Those fuckers.

FWD:

No movement here since the WC: Kane, Rom, and Bobby go again. Need Klopp to stop fucking being dumb and play Bob centrally. Only 1 more game without Mane anyway, so I still like Firmino as a medium to longterm hold. He'll get points, he just hasn't in the last two games. It happens. Kane in a derby, go on Harold. And Rom, I just have stopped even trying to predict what he'll do. He'll do whatever and it won't matter since fuck Rom.

CAP:

Kane. Not much thought here as I do not own Kun. I'm going to stick with Kane for the next couple with the cap and hopefully it comes in. It was my intention to do so when I got him in and I want to follow through. No Obiang for the Hammers means there is a small shout that Noble comes back in. If Noble is in, they are fucked. Fucked.

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Mariappa (and my 3-4-3)

IN: Mendy (and my 4-3-3)

Finally the day has come where I get to spend my fucking money!!! I’m out here writing this the morning of another flight with the end of my vacation near. I really wasn’t sure which defender to get as I’m a bit out of the loop here but I settled on Mendy. It came down to Mendy vs. Otamendi when I was really narrowing down guys because I think City will keep ringing in cleans for fun. Their stats in the goals against department are fucked up good - by far best in the league, and their home fixtures upcoming are mental. Three out of the next four are CPL, STK, and BUR with a wba to follow. Away Chelsea makes that all a little less good but wow those four fixtures and Mendy’s attacking qualities lets fucking go get it.

Otamendi is a real dong threat and obviously much cheaper but I don’t know. I have trouble with him. He’s like a center-back version of Alby Moreno with his mental fucking challenges and fucked up moments of madness. Racks up yellow cards for fun. I don’t know. I don’t trust him... I had the money so whatever. Mendy IN!!!!! That’s all I have to say about that.

GK:

Bob Elliot at Brighton looks very good on paper. Hoping for a clean from prosciutto face Bob. Lot of people have him in now and rightly so. It’s Bob time.

DEF:

Aforementioned new love Mendy slots right on in with the home Palace fixture of dreams... Normally I’d type in some sort of, “Palace haven’t scored so of course they’ll score vs. City blah blah blah,” negative nancy self-deprecating type of dumb thing but I’m in no mood for that as I’m eating breakfast in my underwear on vacation and life is good right now... City is going to fucking massacre Palace and probably keep a clean too. Mendy to get a couple assists and max bones. Come on lad :).

Phil Jones yep. How has he only gone up 0.1 from the start of the season? Cheapest nailed guy and 4/5 matches have been cleans. Wtf??? Regardless he’s an auto-pick and any of you who don’t have him are a little fucking crazy. At Soton should be an easy clean.

Berty home United doesn’t really excite me much. Maybe Soton can dig in and keep the match a 0-0 but probably not; probably looking at a 2 pointer here from Berty. Though I still think he’s a better start then Chalobah or Tom Carroll in better fixtures.

Lastly Naughton as well. Wow Walsh and I have pretty similar teams we should start a podcast together OKKKKKKKKKKKKKK. Go on Kyle. Fuck it all and go get Walsh’s first defensive attacking returns of the season!

MID:

Salah the fucking legend. He just keeps returning and as Walsh said feels like a very safe and longterm hold. He’s just fantastic.

Daveeeeeeed very much a pick that Walsh convinced me of preseason has stayed true to me. Coming through with a kinda lucky (but I’ll take it) 11 pointer last week felt unbelievably good. He is what we thought he might be which is the cheapest nailed meaningful piece of the City pie. Gimme.

And Brady still souping about. Got the assist he deserved. I hope the soup still tastes delicious through this nice little fixture run of HUD, eve, WHU. It tastes MIGHTY fine in this moment.

FWD:

Haven’t moved all year...

Kane. Check.

Rom. Check.

Bobby Firm. Check.

I do not have much to say here. I did not consider moving any of them to Kun. Even though I may or may not have had a wet-dream involving Kun..................:)

CAP:

‘Arry go forth my son. I’m actually flying into London soon (leaving for the airport an hour from writing this) and I’ll be at this match. Going to Olympic Stadium waiting for the Harry beat-off captain session. OMG go on you fucking fuck. Breathe however you want to breathe just DOOOONNNNNGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW5

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week.

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Blind

IN: Davies

Off a WC and not saving...fucking fuck me. Really torn up over this one throughout the week but in the end I think I really just made a mistake and picked the wrong guy. I'm throwing my hands up and rectifying this issue. Jumping on the best defender in the game right now. Blind, I hardly knew ya, but you're fucked right off mate. 4 cleans in the 4 starts you've had you don't deserve this....but....Bavies...fuck. Stats are better than Alonso last year and the fucking boy was basically playing second striker against Dortmund getting in the box that cheeky little son of. He's in. I don't want to stubbornly miss out on all the fun.

GK:

Sticking with Foster this weekend over Elliot. Didn't really think much about it although I've seen plenty of friends with this same GK combo going with Elliot. WBA just such a better defensive outfit and at home they keep their fair share of cleans. West Ham are still West Ham. Good performance on Monday but it was Huddersfield. And they nearly didn't break through. I'll go with TP and his tall lads to get a clean. So, since I'm going Foster you, yes you reader of these words, should go Elliot. Because that's how this works.

DEF:

Looking tidy in defense this weekend. 

New lad Bavies has the home banker against the hapless Swans so a clean feels pretty good here as long as Lloris doesn't do something fucking dumb. 

Jones looks like a steady guy who I will be content to run out there week in week out without hesitation until his injury.

Finally, FRANNO FUCK Simon Francis gets a start for the lads. Cheeky 4.4 boy giving me some excitement to watch the fuckfest game on Friday gets me going. He's generally in Howe's team sheet when he's fit - he was in GW1 and as club captain and Howe already professing the team has missed him I expect him to feature after getting 45 minutes in for the worst player in the Prem Tyrone Mings. I've seen Franno predicted anywhere from RB, RWB, RCB, or CB so don't ask me where he'll play or how Howe will set up but just get me a fucking clean sheet. Don't let Grob do it in the face. Not in the face. Seriously though, I do fancy Bournemouth in this game. Think they will do Brighton to nil. Go on.

MID:

My sexy Jese gets a go. He inadvertently came on for me last week with Blind's surprise no show, but now is his time to shine. No more DDG in goal this weekend against you my son. Show me your dong and some dongs.

Eriksen just looks like the best shit of life, he's going to be in the team for quite a while so feels good to have him in here.

With Mane out, Salad feels a lot safer in this moment for the next couple and hopefully he can fucking do some shit against Burnley. Burnley were absolutely all over the fucking shop against Palace last weekend and if they do that against this team they are going to be looking at a 6-0 or something. We'll see if Dyche can get his bus in order.

Brady on the other side of this coin. Eh. Not feeling great but maybe he can get me a cheeky assist through ball on a counter or some shit off a set piece. Idk. Good luck Robbie.

FWD:

Bobby goes. Pen duties? Eek. Fucking Bob.

Kane obv.

Rom obv.

Safe and safe. Not much to chat about here. Forwards feel good. Rom is on borrowed time, maybe? The Donk just keeps scoring and finding a way. Each game.

CAP:

KANE as if there was any question. He'll probably get 70 minutes in this one....but it should be 4-0 by that time with his haul in place. Go fucking fuck my young Harold. My absolute glorious lovely son.  

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Heaton

IN: Elliot

Oof writing these at 7am before I go catch another flight... Sorry if they’re a little stale <3........

In the end Heaton had to be dealt with and I followed my pod partner’s suggestion of Bob Elliot to tend the goal for me. I’m now spending 8.0m on the GK position which feels great as it’s always the lowest scoring position in the game, so I think structurally I’m sound there, but I just need some points to follow. Hopefully I didn’t miss out on all Bob points and now he’s gonna be horrible, but it’s very possible.

I wonder which certainty will come through? Walsh starts Foster so that’s a jinx yet he’s also benching Elliot so that’s a GOOD jinx. I’m starting Elliot though so that’s another bad jinx and I don’t know what wins in the battle of light and dark......... Just kidding we both know who wins. Elliot is fucked.

GK:

The aforementioned Prosciutto Face Rob Bob Elliot between the sticks. He’s been solid this year, Newcastle are solid, we’ll see what happens. I back Rafa to decode Hughesys shit and keep the Potter horses in check.

DEF:

Jones home Everton feels to me like a nailed on clean. Ronald has to change something with Everton quickly or he’s going to start feeling some heat. Getting absolutely DONE in Europa League yesterday was not ideal for him/them in this moment.

Southampton and Ryan Berty at Palace, probably the worst team in the division, should also sound like a nailed on clean but let’s not kid ourselves, Soton are fucking shit. Who knows how this piece of ass fuck game goes but one thing is for sure that Berty will drop points... I think Walsh and I took Palace in survivor because fuck boring boring Soton.

Lastly rotational cog for me Danny Simpson slots in with Naughton away at Spurs, Danny has the nice fixture away at Huddersfield. The last time I needed Danny in he came through with a steady 6 pointer and anything less then that this time around I will be disappointed. Go on Danny.

MID:

Salah and Salad and Sarah and Pauline still go, he’s still a great pick as I said on the pod. His goal in UCL was lucky bullshit but whatever, the point is he will just keep racking up attacking returns from where I’m sitting. And he has to be nailed with the Mane ban.

Daveed goes again walking the tightrope for me after blanking in the 5-0. It’s good that he got on the board in UCL that feels promising to me although I did not watch the match. Another day another who knows with City. Where will he play? I don’t know. How will they set up? I don’t know. Will they struggle to score or will they score 4+? I still don’t know.

Brady away at Anfield. Not ideal as Burnley are to be bossed for possession, though it must be said if Brady’s corner/FK deliveries are on point, there are returns to be had in this one. Burnley did us last season.

And last and least unfortunately I’m still stuck starting 4.5 Chalobah and this time home to Man City. Sucks, but I’ve had other transfers to deal with and it hasn’t been worth taking a hit to get rid of him in this moment.

FWD:

The pillars of FPL come straight the fuck in and these lads haven’t moved for me since GW1 which feels pretty nice. Kane, Rom, Bobby. Go the fuck on. Nothing to be said.

CAP:

Harry. Do you listen to our pod? It’s Harry and there’s no discussion to be had. He’s the standout captain for the next four gameweeks running. End of.