#also they are not playing try hard in todays climate. like ‘she’s 17 i told her i’m 20’ huh? jail. immediately that’s where they’d be

[confusionmeisss]

i know these silly little losers are laughing their asses off at us right now over this “setlist”

anyway, i see: end up here, try hard, you don’t go to parties, older, ghost of you, jet black heart, caramel

[thearcanaartificer]

i am curious about numbers 14, 17 and 18

Sorry this took a while, I meant to write this earlier today but I had to come to some hard decisions (which “paid scene” to describe since I am writing a story on AO3 about these two).

14. Describe a “paid scene” with your character and their LI

This was hard to choose. Especially since I am writing my own version of Julian’s route and anything I write here might be prone to changing. But I will choose something.

It was the first time Odelia had ever seen or experienced snow. Vesuvia has a warm climate year round, only slightly cooling during the winter months with how short the days could get. She had read about snow, but to see it, to feel it, to experience it. 

It was marvelous. 

She was still marveling at how it blanketed the woods around them when it happened

Bam!

A flurry of cold white exploded a part upon impact

She shrieked in surprise, leapt a bit into the air as she spun about

Were they being attacked?!

Julian’s laughter warmed her heart as her eyes landed on him and then his smile made her insides do flips.

That unadulterated smile. That adorable laugh!

She wanted to see it everyday for the rest of their lives

Then it struck her that he had thrown that orb of snow

Oho ho? So he wanted to play? Two could play this game.

In fact, he challenged her to a snowball (snowball- that’s what it’s called) fight, winner gets a wish granted

He was on.

Odelia is competitive and Julian quickly finds out that he’d have to get serious if he didn’t want to lose right out of the gate.

Shenanigans ensue

A few stunts are pulled that are dubbed as ‘cheating’ by the victim

A dramatic death scene plays out after Odelia throws a magic infused snowball to create the perfect curve shot right to Julian’s face

Odelia, in return, laments the death of her darling man

Pounces on him while he’s too busy guffawing on the ground at the delivery of her monologue to protect himself

Squeals and writhes when she shoves snow down his shirt

In fact, just outright scoops the snow from around them on top of him

Grabs her arms to keep her from burying him any further

“Serves you right for unbuttoning your shirt all the time!”

“But I hate how stuffy it gets! Let me be free to choose a life of unbuttoned shirts, nah, a life without buttons at all!” He dramatically drapes an arm over his face. So Dramatic. She loves it.

“Seems like my darling man likes his tiddies on display at all times. Foul tempter. How dare you, hmmm, tease me- distract me- so.”

Sits on his lap and kisses him stupid

After a good long while, she concedes to letting him up, only because he’s starting to shiver from the snow

Climbs onto his back, pronounces him her steed as her boon, and, with a squeeze, beckons him forwards

“Come my majestic steed! Go forth! To reclaim my magic realm!”

He had to lean against a tree to prevent himself from falling over as he just lost it. It took him a while to recover from all the laughing, but Odelia didn’t mind the time lost. It was nice to see him so happy and carefree.

She promised herself that she’d make sure there would be more days like this after all was said and done.

17. Describe the wedding

Ahaha, this is a loaded ask. To be honest, they can’t describe the original wedding to anyone. Not because they wouldn’t like to, but, uh, they, um… can’t remember. They may have been sorta, kinda, very, extremely inebriated. Like, woke up in their inn with wedding bands on after a drinking binge while on a trip to Praka to get their licenses (His doctor’s licenses finally and the various licenses that Nadia told her she now needed to have to run her various businesses). At first, Julian panicked because, honestly, this was not how he had wanted to ask her. Besides that, they had only been courting for two-three months by this point. He knows he’s prone to leaping over a ton of important steps (breaking up with people he’s not even dating), but this? This was not how he wanted to do it. 

It took Odelia a good while to calm him down from his hysterics. However, when Julian suggested going to get the marriage annulled- Odelia shot him down with a ‘Why? Then I’ll just have to get my name changed on all my licenses when we do get married again. No thanks.’ His heart just about melted at the word ‘again’. Besides that, if they got married in Vesuvia, Odelia was a hundred percent certain that everything would be overtaken by the others. It would be expensive and stressful for one dumb day where they had a huge party that they would never be allow to properly participate in because they would be on display and expected to behave a certain way. He agreed that didn’t sound fun. Later, though, he comes to find out that the rings they were wearing were made by Odelia and she had been waiting for him to ask shortly after he moved in, already certain that she wasn’t going to change her mind about him.

Sweet, yes? Well, these two knew they come back married that there was going to be hell on earth with their family. Portia especially would be angry because there was no wedding and she didn’t get to be a part of it at all. Also, they really didn’t want to hear about making such a big decision drunk (’typical Julian’ they could hear almost everyone say and Odelia wasn’t really up to hearing it either since she said yes, thankyouverymuch), so they just didn’t tell anyone that they got married… for three years. It came out on accident. In fact, it was after Nadia and Portia had gotten married and signatures for a land purchase had to be written in their legal names and… well… busted.

So their vow renewal that they were forced into was loud, excessive, stressful and completely planned by Nadia and Portia and the two of them were merely dragged around, like Odelia had foreseen. Julian did like her dress though and loved taking the garter off, but for the most part would have rather just had a wild celebration at the Rowdy Raven with the scoundrels there. Odelia would have preferred to just keep going like they had been, but she will admit, Nadia has an excellent eye for men’s lingerie.

18. Any babies?

For the longest time, when people asked these two about if they were going to have a baby, Odelia would look at them and tell them ‘Julian’s the baby’. And, to be fair, when people asked Julian, he had no shame telling them ‘I’m the baby’. Or they would just defer to their multitude of pets as their ‘babies’. No intention of actually having children. However, because Odelia’s tribe are a close knit community, when a baby girl was born with some serious health issues that the mother couldn’t keep up with due to her own weakened state after the birth; it was the Devoraks to the rescue. The two of them were there for that baby’s every need until her mother was capable of taking care of her again.

The whole thing changed their thoughts on their current lifestyle. Without getting too into it, the two of them decided that if they had a baby, then they had a baby. They weren’t going to try for it, but they happy if it happened. They ended up with two boys pretty close together and got a huge surprise way down the line with a little girl. Dimitri, Nikolai, and Odette. 

Though the two of them have taken other children, plucked out of the streets usually by Julian, into their homes and called them their own. And fostered a few children too. There were also a few newborns they adopted from Odelia’s tribe when the mothers died from complications in child birth. Julian loves babies, so even years down the line, when Odelia and him are too old to be having or raising an infant, he goes and helps babysit babies when their parents need some rest.

[purplesurveys]

958

Who’s one person who changed how you viewed something? Gabie has left me a big life realization or two.

At what age do you feel like you grew up mentally/emotionally? Well I think at any age people don’t stop growing and learning, but at this point in my life I felt like I did a lot of growing up at 17 in particular. There were a lot of losses endured and big decisions that had to be made when I was that age.

Do you have any brothers? I have a brother. Singular.

Are you currently happy? No. It’s gonna take a while to get there again, if I ever do.

Who did you talk on the phone with last night? No one. Work was prrrrretty exhausting yesterday so I was passed out by 9 PM. Wasn’t really in the mood to talk to anyone either; I just wanted my bed.

Is anything bugging you right now? Ugh, yep.

Who is the last person you missed a call from? My mom. She always seems to call on the ultra rare occasions that I put my phone down, which almost never happens.

What annoys you most in a person? Probably those who come off as unapproachable and unpleasant right off the bat. I get people who can be quiet at first because I can be that way too, but there’s still a big difference between being shy and just plain unapproachable.

Have you changed this year? For sure. 2020 has been a big year so far in terms of life changes and I’ve been greatly affected by all of them.

What are you listening to right now? I can hear Rhett and Link trying weird kinds of fondue.

Are you talking to anyone tonight? I don’t think so. I prefer not to, though; I’m always so tired after work haha.

Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Not at all. I feel relaxed going to the doctor because it means getting feedback on whatever condition or illness I’m having. I feel way more nervous for interviews or having to take calls HAHA 

Whose bed did you sleep in last that wasn’t yours? My parents’, back when I was sick a few months ago. They had to look after me because I had felt super faint for a few days.

Are you a really understanding person? Yeah, very. I don’t know if it’s overall a good thing or not because historically, being understanding has made it easier for some people walk all over me. I don’t regret it though. It feels nice to be nice.

How many hours of sleep did you get last night? Around 10. This work-from-home thing is pretty sweet; it’s a big relief no longer having to drive to the workplace and spend 4 hours in traffic everyday.

How many pillows do you like to sleep with? Two.

Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? Yeah once at midnight, another time at 3 AM. I fell back asleep easily though.

How are you feeling lately? Kinda annoyed at a miscommunication that someone else caused at work that led me to be wrongfully scolded; mostly relieved because I’ve done my tasks for now and I think I did a pretty good job. Also relieved because it’s lunch break which means I have time to take this survey.

How do you wear your hair most of the time? Down or in a lazy, low bun.

Think back to the end of last school year, who did you have feelings for? Gab.

In a relationship, do you think about the future, or now? I think of both. It’s not that hard.

Think back to the last person you kissed, did that person ever give you a piggy back ride? Yup, plenty. I’m half her weight so I’m easy to carry around.

Did you see your best friend today? I haven’t seen either in a while, no. Angela especially – I haven’t seen her since March.

Are you close to your father? Definitely closer to him than I am with my mom, but I wouldn’t call him a confidante or anything like that. He’s just more relatable and it’s easier to talk and open up to him. He also never scolds me, so there’s that.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart? It’s definitely possible. I’m sure I disappointed my mom a few times back when I was in my angsty-teenager-going-through-puberty phase, lol.

Where did you go today? The farthest I’ve gone is the kitchen to get myself brunch and coffee.

Where are you located right now? I’m in my bedroom, working on the floor because I find it more comfortable for the meantime.

What’s between you and the last person you texted? I dunno. It’s weird at the moment. 

Could you go a month without talking to your best friend? I technically could, but it would be miserable.

What was the last piece of furniture you purchased? I didn’t purchase it myself, but my mom got me a new desk in my room.

Have you ever broken up with someone for a reason other than lack of feelings (ex. moving away, etc.)? Nope.

Has anyone ever told you that you are too picky when it comes to the people you date? What about not picky enough? Ugh, I’ve taken this survey before looooooool. I’m too far in it now though, so I guess I’ll just suck it up. I remember answering this by saying that as a demi I’m bound to be very picky, and that I’m alright with that.

When was the last time you went to a bar? Start of Feb, at Kiana’s friend’s boyfriend’s new bar. I feel bad for the dude for having his bar open mere weeks before a global pandemic blew up, but I’m glad to see that it’s still doing well with online orders and such.

What three things would you change about your life? I wish my internship would soon turn into a full-time position; I wish I was more stable and happier; I wish I had a few creative talents under my belt like cooking and knowing how to play at least one instrument.

Was there anything unusual or unique about your birth? I’m gonna retain my old answer and say that it’s my siblings who get to share weirder facts about their birth. My mom’s pregnancy with me went smoothly.

What has happened in the past week that is worth remembering in five years? Internship and other life things. September 2020 is a month to remember lol

How much of your day did you spend completely alone? For the last week or so I’ve been mostly alone since internship eats up my days. I show up to my family for dinner, but that’s about it.

What was the best conversation you’ve had recently? Angela giving me a pep talk the other day. I’ve been holed up by myself for the last few days, so it felt amazing to reach out to a friend.

What is the next book you are going to read? I’ll continue reading Midnight Sun, as slow as my progress is.

Describe the hardest decision you have ever made. I’m currently in the process of having to pick a big decision but I don’t feel like getting into it.

Why did you last see the doctor? I had a pesky fever that wasn’t going away and I was starting to get scared that it was either dengue or COVID altogether.

Post a recent picture of yourself. Eh, you’re not getting one today, survey.

How do you spend the majority of your free time? I like watching YouTube videos, doing surveys, reading articles, and playing with Cooper.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow? Just hoping for more tasks to be handed to me so I can maximize my time in my internship.

List the cards in your wallet. Debit card, school ID, driver’s license, gas station card for perks, a couple of business cards, and a card listing down rights of media practitioners that was handed to us by the college’s student council a few years ago. As for the latter, that was when the political climate was a bit of a mess and when that happens, journalism practitioners and students are usually the main targets of the cops. We were given that card so we can protect ourselves just in case something shitty happened to any one of us.

What was the last thing to inspire you? The aforementioned pep talk given to me by Angela.

Who was the last person to do something nice for you? One of my superiors at work complimented me on the slides I worked on.

What was the lowest point of this year? The highest? Highest point would be pre-Covid days, which sucks because those were a lifetime ago. There has been a lot of low points.

Is there any artwork in the room you’re in? Yep.

What is your number one short-term goal? Long-term? Short-term is to do well in this internship, long-term is to work towards a career in a field that I’m into and happy in and let everything follow from there.

Are you dealing with anything difficult at the moment? Yes.

[jenz]

Chrysanthemum

I woke up two nights ago from a dream feeling paralyzed from the nostalgia it shot through my veins. In my slumber, I dreamt that I was a carnival performer, and was backstage getting ready when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around to be greeted by an old flame, who bent down to give me an encouraging kiss. As he pulled away, he smiled that same smirk I recalled.

When I came back into reality, I laid transfixed in bed, stunned that this moment felt current. But I also felt a bit alarmed. That moment in the dream - the cupping of my face, the warmth I could feel in his fingers as they touched my skin, the kiss length - felt exactly like what it was when we were together. How could this kiss feel the same while being unconscious? How could something from a decade ago surface and feel so bitingly legitimate?

I let this uneasy, erotic, restless feeling dictate my day. I kept re-playing over and over the intimacy we had had; how we used to swap music discoveries, the drives we used to take, all the photo shoots I made him pose for. The way he held my hand that one Halloween, the way I used to look at him while we had dinner, the way he broke up with me after we went for pho. I remembered what my life was like then and it made me feel...unsettled. How can you be so fond and devoted and APART of someone and then just...not? Why do we allow ourselves to open up and expose the depths of our fragility, our dreams, only to have it languish?

It didn't stop there. I went deeper into my romantic history, to my first real love who broke my heart when he cheated on me, to the bartender who couldn't commit, to the serial manipulator who I swore was going to be The One. I rehashed all the beautiful and dirty and carnal and destructive things that happened in those relationships, and completely began to incapacitate myself emotionally. When you go that far down a rabbit hole, it takes a mighty force to 180 you back to your senses, and at this point, I was full speed ahead into Torture 101.

It was here I decided I was going to go visit my grandma at her final resting place. Somewhere I avoided for the last 2 years because the pain was too much to face again. Losing a loved one is always hard, and losing a person you treasured so faithfully is agonizing. So naturally, a cemetery seemed like the place to go given my emotional state. I rolled up with a potted plant in hand and just sat with her and my grandpa, trying to make sense of the complex whirlwind shitshow that was my brain. And it finally hit me that I've been tying everything - and I mean, everything - to the idea of leaving San Francisco and not being ready for change.

We're in the middle of trying to buy a house out of the city, away from friends, family, close support circles. The pace of life will be different. The resources and political sphere and climate will be wholly different. We're literally trading in city life for desert living. And for the past 2 months, I have tried to make sense of this momentous change, started keeping notes on why San Francisco is important and what it means to leave it. My ode to this beautiful city will come in its own edition. But to understand how I am leaving means I have been 150% examining what it meant to even be here. To move here a week after I turned 18, to have my memories splattered on every street corner. To follow the friends and jobs and lessons I have learned in the 17 years I decided to place roots and blossom into who I am today. I have spent my formative adult life in the City by the Bay and it changed me. It told me I was good enough and gave me opportunities to explore my passions in the arts, in community, in music. It was cruel when my friends had to leave due to the cost of living. It was welcoming every time I needed a beer or a street taco to celebrate my wins or drown my sorrows. I have, as it turns out, so much to fucking say about SF that the nostalgia has been manifesting in everything. Reminiscing about old friendships. Former apartments. And past lovers, it turns out.

I wasn't ready when my grandma died. I knew the grief of missing her would palpitate for a long time after her departure, and the sting still pierces me at times, even now. But it's been two years since she went to the stars, and...I'm OK. I ended up being fine, and the hole in my heart has now been filled with understanding and acceptance that change is something you have to deal with. How you react to it is your own choice. I loved her so much, but am happy for her suffering to have ended. And I think about how, if she were here, she'd chastise me about having blue hair and getting more tattoos and ask how I was feeling. Not what I was doing, but how I was feeling. What was I doing to feel connected and fulfilled, and, was I happy?

I'd like to think that she would be proud with me. And content to see me progress to the next stage of life with my other half.

[2centsofsilver]

9/17/2020. Therapy Prep Notes

In the last week I’ve been more anxious than usual with more thoughts consuming my mind and more mental conundrums. Fall time always brings “start of school” adrenaline rushes, anxiety, butterflies, and excitement. I wish I were able to walk around a campus with friends and participate in welcome activities. The September campus bustle has always brought me great glee. I just drove through UM and every single person was (surprisingly) wearing a mask. I felt I should be too given the case spike on campus so I donned one while driving. Festivities were not the same. Socially distanced tents where solemn students sat alone, single students walking down the sidewalks, drastically less bustle than normally. Regular downtown like Division and Main St were more crowded with roads blocked off for distances outdoor dining.

This is weird but I woke up really missing work today. There was a flu shot clinic email from the J and even though I have my own ways of getting mine, I responded to my boss, who I hate, to ask if it’s an option for me, in which he replied yes. It’s not like I’d be able to see anyone, but I just suddenly miss JCC.

Nannying lately has been different because the mom recently told me she’d be sending the youngest to Bunnies in just one month, hence leaving me jobless for the first time since June. I knew this day would come, but it blindsighted me because she’s been so inconsistent about when and so satisfied with our interactions and learning all summer. The last big consensus seemed to be January and using me all winter, but I went out of town to visit my family for 6 days leaving the boy with his mom 2 extra hours a day for 5 days and apparently this was too much to bear. Upon my return she was frazzled and anxious about his lack of socialization. “He doesn’t even know other children his size exist besides his brother!”

So I’ve been taking him outside this week to get out of the house and excessive electronics and plastic toys. It’s beautiful weather and finally no more heat/POTS symptoms from that. I had to send a big huge thing to her about the benefits of outdoor play. For many reasons she hadn’t let me take him out until now. He has just turned 18 months. We have been having lovely times. His favorite expressions outside are “Wee!” (swinging), “Wow!” (tractor, airplane, cars), and “Woah!” (sticking rocks through holes in the fence, big sticks, etc.) He says “woof woof” at puppies and squirrels, “ah-pay” for airplane, and today “Brrrrrrr!!!” on repeat while we ate lunch at a shaded picnic table. I bundled him up in 2 jackets even though it was warm in the sun (took them off), but watched him experience those temperature changes with more awareness than his first season change in infancy. He watched the leaves blow in the wind, his snowy white little hands turned whiter and his veins bluer, and he giggled in confusion as his mouth shivered like mad. I hugged him and bundled him and we experienced it together, then played in the sun. These moments feel so sentimental to me like how I imagine heaven. Pure, lovingly innocent. Why do they make me sad?

School starts 9/28 and I’m taking “Toddlers: Big Emotions” and a foundations course. I’m nervous about my ADHD. I am so unable to achieve basic tasks and I have zero spark whatsoever to start something. I can’t even respond to emails from people I REALLY care about like my favorite professors, Jean and Michelle. I’ve had months to finish a project, but it was self-initiated from the start, a terrible setup. I need to figure out what I need from my profs in advance and communicate that to them.

I think the worst thing about this pandemic is being completely emotionless and sparkless abs trying to figure out why and how to fix it. Am I angry? Numb? Overly-medicated? Frozen? Apathetic? Traumatized? Flat? There’s no way I don’t care about the state of the world. I DO. But it’s not that shocking to me I guess. My whole life I’ve predicted (and feared) an apocalypse. I never knew when it would happen but when Trump entered the White House and Covid came about, I did feel fear & anxiety yes, but it was so abstract it barely felt like anything. Like how can I imagine those California wildfires if I have never seen one before? How can I imagine my dream city PDX covered in soot? How can I imagine no longer visiting Reggio Emilia and giving up my goals and plans that have already taken years to develop? My dreams never felt like reality, always fantasy, or like opportunities in another life. They were already so far away to begin with. How can I imagine the hundreds of thousands of people who are DEAD from Covid if I have no conception of how many people that is or what that anyone of people looks like, already not understanding or understanding how death is even real. Things I feared in my earliest 20s have somehow subdued. And I grew up in Trumpville, I know how bottom of the barrel this country is. So I’m not “shook” learning these supporters have come out of the shadows. I’m not raging angry like yelling and screaming. I’m not quivering in anxiety or doom or terror. I’m not sobbing or shedding 1 tear for that matter. I wish I could, I don’t know why I’m not. But I just sort of expected all this horror would happen one day and now it’s here and I don’t feel anything besides apathy, sarcasm, and the same misery I’ve always felt. The only thing that really seems to emotionally agonize me is climate change and our environmental crisis, but that’s a huge passion of mine. Knowing the west coast fires are circulating smoke around the world including over Michigan, east coast, and Europe deeply affects me, but still no emotion exists. I read books on climate change early as a child, so much of the global damage is out of our control at this point so why would I feel a spark to take action or an urgency to cry? Is death upon me closer than I think? Will it be painful when I slip away? The more I think about this the more I worry so I have to stop.

My fatness has made its presence known in my psyche 24/7. It’s so fucking hard getting up and down. I fear I may be in the 400s. It’s not the number that bothers me, it’s just that it makes sense how this could happen given my sedentary POTS and eating a pint of ice cream every night etc etc. I don’t care, but I also really do care. All I want is to feel good physically and move more gracefully because my body is in agonizing pain all the time. I took a walk Monday night .7 miles and it was so hard carrying my new gullet around that I thought I wouldn’t make it. I could physically feel it’s buency each step I took forward on each thigh and my stomach and my back locked into a permanent arch. I’ve had shin splints all week. I wish I hadn’t let things get this bad. I feel trapped between those 3 voices of protection — authentic Self, scared younger self, and quick to excuse myself from anything that might help because it’s “too hard.”

My OCD is record bad especially the sexual kind. I want to take care of this but how do I tell Amy? And which fire matters most?

Most pressing are emotionlessness, 3 energies, and the sexual OCD.

[canadianabroadvery]

Canada's Conservatives are “completely clued out” about the unpopularity of hard-right social policies and are essentially “campaigning against themselves,” two leading political commentators argued in an online panel discussion last Monday.

Answering questions from Canada's National Observer editor-in-chief Linda Solomon Wood, columnists Bruce Livesey and Sandy Garossino spent an hour tackling wide-ranging questions about why today's Canadian conservative movement has moved so far to the right, its hopes for retaking power in the face of an increasingly progressive populace, and how evangelical Christians and Big Oil got a stranglehold on the right.

“The social conservative base is enormously powerful,” Livesey told Solomon Wood and the audience of 100 participants on the Zoom webinar, part of Conversations, sponsored by Canada's National Observer. “The reason (leadership rivals) Peter MacKay and Erin O'Toole have taken the positions they're doing — which are ludicrous in terms of ever trying to get elected — is because the base has this enormous social conservative element. In order to win the leadership, you've got to pander to them.”

But that's precisely what has lost them repeated elections, and will only worsen their chances over time, he said.

Livesey — an award-winning investigative journalist with experience on CBC's flagship shows The Fifth Estate and The National, Global News' 16×9, and PBS's Frontline — most recently did an analysis on the state of the Conservatives for the National Observer entitled, How Stephen Harper is destroying the Conservative party.

He said he interviewed between 25 and 30 sources for his story, and other than a couple political scientists as experts, focused almost entirely on hearing from Conservative members past and present.

“I tried to basically interview just Conservatives … people within the party, both from when they used to be called the PC (Progressive Conservative) party all the way up to the current generation,” Livesey said. “There's a lot of people who wouldn't talk to me … It was a big challenge; given that I was going to talk to them about Stephen Harper, there seemed to be a bit of a concern.”

But some did want to talk, and could be broadly lumped into two camps: the long-ousted progressive wing of the party, once nicknamed “Red Tories”; and the more recent alumni and strategists of the Harper era.

“If you talked to the sort of Red Tories — the 'liberal' wing of the party — there was no surprise there that they think the party's stuck in a ditch,” Livesey said. “The more interesting thing was finding the younger generation who were around Harper in some capacity, who are beginning to realize — having lost two back-to-back elections — that something was wrong.”

What exactly is wrong, however, he found divisive amongst loyalists. Some expressed hope to find a better leader than Andrew Scheer to save their flagging fortunes. But others, Livesey said, had started to see problems in the party's offerings to voters altogether.

“That's the contradiction the party's in at the moment,” Livesey, author of the book Thieves of Bay Street, said. “The base just thinks, 'We just need the next Stephen Harper to lead us back into power.'

“Abortion and gay marriage — those are the two issues that get social conservatives all agitated, and they want to have something done about them. Harper was brilliant at keeping that element under a lock and key. Scheer was not … nobody trusted him on those issues. The social conservative base is an enormous problem for that party.”

Whoever wins the leadership of the party, Livesey predicted, must “basically ignore what the base is” if they want to win enough seats outside Alberta, the Prairies and rural Ontario.

Hard Right

Garossino, meanwhile, agreed that infighting over who can be the most hardline on divisive issues such as LGBTQ rights and abortion is only hurting the party more with each utterance and campaign plank.

The popular longtime columnist with Canada's National Observer spent years previously as a Crown prosecutor and trial lawyer and Vancouver community advocate. She is also a keen observer of Canadian and American political trends, admitting Monday she's a big nerd for electoral data and crunching riding numbers. While she and Livesey admitted few Tories are likely paying heed to this publication, they ought to at least pay attention to the dismal electoral data.

When it comes to hard-right social issues, the numbers don't lie.

“They're actually campaigning against themselves the more they play to that,” Garossino said. “It doesn't play in any of the areas that the federal Conservatives need to take power. They have got to get into the 905 — the (Greater Toronto Area) — and they've got to get into Quebec.”

According to the most recent polls, the Conservatives are indeed trailing behind the Liberals — despite Scheer's repeated attempts to portray Prime Minister Justin Trudeau as a reckless spendthrift, contemptuous of accountability and the rule of law.

A new poll released June 28 by respected pollster Léger Marketing placed Liberals at 40 per cent support, double-digits ahead of Conservatives in voter intentions compared to the Tories' 28 per cent. (The survey of 1,524 Canadians gave the NDP 17 per cent support, the Bloc Québecois seven per cent, and Greens one point behind; the online poll's margin of error could be considered equivalent to 2.5 per cent.) The results mirrored another opinion survey last week.

But yet another poll by Ekos Research found an even starker divide when it comes to gender last week, with Liberals leading among women with a staggering 24 per cent lead over the Tories, which held a slight lead over the Grits among men.

Multi-poll aggregator 338Canada, meanwhile, ran 250,000 statistical election simulations using recent polls and predicted a 189-seat Liberal seat majority if an election were held now, with the Tories trailing at 94 seats (a party needs a minimum 170 seats to win a majority government).

But both Livesey and Garossino reminded participants in the Zoom event that key to electoral victory in Canada is commanding broad support across the most vote-rich, densely populated urban centres — particularly the Greater Toronto Area suburbs, Montreal, and B.C.'s Lower Mainland. It was a lesson former Prime Minister Stephen Harper understood despite his past social-conservative, Reform Party roots.

That's something Livesey believes the Conservatives have lost sight of completely. He has little hope the once-moderate stalwarts of the party will regain control any time soon because of the need to survive the hard-right base that serves as a gauntlet for would-be leaders.

“They're not taking into consideration the electoral math that plays into this,” he explained. “The Tories' base gets them about 30 per cent of the vote, but to win a minority, you need around 35, a majority around 40.

“That means you've got to convince ... the very seat-rich urban hubs like Vancouver, Toronto, Montreal … that you represent their interests. That is the programmatic problem with the party now. They have completely clued out to the fact that those voters don't want to vote for that particular platform.”

Stuck on Harper

In his June 25 analysis, Livesey argued former prime minister Stephen Harper remains the most powerful force in today's party, but may be, in fact, undermining “the very thing he created” as his successor Scheer steers the party sharply towards the far right on issues such as abortion and LGBTQ rights.

It's something Tory supporters should be extremely wary of, particularly as the far-right administration in the pandemic-gutted United States faces “potential devastation of unbelievable proportions because of the failure of this one man,” Garossino said. But the roots of the crisis go back decades to Reagan-era right-wing neoliberal movements, she and Livesey agreed, as billionaires and corporations were effectively handed the keys to power in the U.S.

Today, with tens of millions of unemployed losing their private health benefits, the chickens are now coming home to roost in that country.

“If you look at the trajectory, this is the sum result of a program that began in the '70s and '80s to, in effect, ensure the state did nothing for the average American citizen,” Livesey said. “(It marked) the end of the so-called welfare state — the New Deal type of government — and the capture of the state by largely the billionaire class.”

But although the Tea Party hasn't taken hold to the same extent north of the 49th parallel, similar hardline right movements have found sympathy in many parts of Canada.

Canadians, and particularly those loyal to the Conservative party, ought to worry about similar political movements here gaining any more foothold than they have. But it was actually Canada's Reagan-era Conservative leader who garnered some positive attention in Monday's online discussion.

Faced with a stark ideological choice today, Tories might look for inspiration — and success — to former PM Brian Mulroney.

“The PCs recognized they had to be a centre party to win power. The person most genius at figuring that out was Mulroney, he won two solid majorities … and destroyed the Liberals in Quebec. They had the 'big tent' approach, that social conservatives, Red Tories, environmentalists, people from all walks of life, fiscal conservatives, could all be under the same umbrella." Livesey said.

“It worked until it didn't work.”

Mulroney was also considered a leader on environmental issues, and even stalwart Conservative architect Tom Flanagan told Livesey he hoped for some critical Tory reflection on their climate change and carbon pricing policies.

“There is increasing awareness they have to be better on that front,” Livesey said, “even if it is in a very cynical way.”

But it's not just the evangelicals trying to steer the Tory ship. Another powerful force in the country has leveraged influence extremely effectively. Livesey and Garossino said other than the Tories' social conservative base, the party also has been held “hostage” by the oil industry lobby and some of Harper's former entourage, such as Jason Kenney, now Alberta premier.

Garossino has frequently commented on the state of Canada's Conservatives, most recently in her May 27 column, Stephen Harper's power dissolves, in which she argued that Harper continues to “control his chastened party” from the sidelines, but as “the right’s energy and narrative has been seized by Trumpian ideologues,” the Canadian electoral as moved on and is no longer interested.

Canada's Conservatives ought to ponder those trends carefully before selecting their next leader, Garossino said, but she's not hopeful.

“To get to be a contender nationally, you have to get past the base, which is far more conservative than the Canadian public,” she said. “They're almost fighting against themselves.”

Could the Red Tories stage a Mulroney-inspired comeback — and retake the reins from today's increasingly unpalatable oil and religious party wings? That remains to be seen.

[ramialkarmi]

We asked 10 American teens about Trump, the American Dream, ‘Finstas,’ and their fears for the future

Those who make up Generation Z — generally defined as those born after 1995 — are coming of age after the Great Recession and the September 11, 2001 attacks. They do not remember a US president before Barack Obama, or life without the iPhone. Everything has always been one tap away.

At approximately 60 million, Generation Z Americans outnumber millennials by nearly 1 million. Compared with their predecessors, members of Gen Z are true digital natives, with 92% having a digital footprint on social media and the web. But that doesn't mean they overshare. Teens are more likely to curate their profiles than their parents, who just put everything up.

They're also highly entrepreneurial (72% of teens say they want to start a business someday) and are working and driving less than past generations. Nearly half of Gen Z is also not white, making it the most ethnically diverse generation in history.

And while many American adults identify as being on either the right or the left on the political spectrum, a 2016 survey of 150,000 teens found that most say they are both: socially liberal and moderate but also moderate to conservative financially.

"They want a balanced budget, but they want universal healthcare — things that other generations have seen as opposing or a choice. They see them as one or want both," Corey Seemiller, a Wright State University professor who studies Gen Z, told Business Insider.

But, as with any generation, there's a great amount of diversity within teenage America, too.

Business Insider spoke with teens from across the US with different hometowns, political views, and socioeconomic backgrounds about their lifestyles, hopes, and worries.

Below, check out personal stories from 10 American teens, who are trying to create America's future right now.

SEE ALSO: Teens from across the country reveal the 11 companies they think are cool

Max Doocy, 17 — A male, Catholic feminist with two moms

In his conservative town of Omaha, Nebraska, Max helps lead a club that started in the '70s, called Prep Accepts, at his Catholic high school. The club acts as a space where students discuss how to make the school more inclusive. Topics include abortion, racism, and same-sex marriage — the latter of which is personally significant to Max, who has two gay moms, Carol and Laura.

But in 2015, the school threatened to shut the club down after wealthy donors in the area said they would withdraw funding. Max immediately sent a letter to the local archbishop and met with the school president, who reinstated Prep Accepts. This school year, Max said more white, non-LGBT students showed up to meetings.

Tell me about where you live. What do you like most about it?

"There's a lot of businesspeople and a lot of old money and not as many cornfields as people think. Omaha is known for mansions, because they're much cheaper here. Coming from California, we bought a 7,000-square-foot house with seven bedrooms for the amount of money a down payment was in Alameda ... I like that it has a small-town feel. People are really nice to each other — and let you cut them off in traffic and not freak out."

Do you feel like you fit in?

"I don't like how conservative it is. People are usually open-minded, but religion is used as a basis for being judgmental."

Have you ever faced discrimination? 

"I went to a Catholic elementary school. When it went public that I have two moms, it was a big problem. [The students] were called to the church on campus, and the archbishop of our area talked about how homosexuality and homosexual actions are against God and that as a church community they needed to come together and act against it and not support families who support it, and that was pretty much me ... I remember sitting there thinking, 'What does this mean for my family? How do I deal with it?'" 

Are you a feminist?

"Yep. It's something that makes a lot of guys uncomfortable, but I would not think twice about answering that as a 'yes.'"

Do you think the American dream is still alive?

"Yeah, I think so. I think it is what you make of it. If you want to think that it's not, it won't be. But if you think it is and work for it, anything is open."

Kai Morton, 18 — A coder who wants to make social change

Kai programmed her first video game when she was 11 years old on a big, purple, clunky laptop. In the game, players jump from platform to platform to collect bugs.

Today, at 18, she knows 15 coding languages and is learning how to develop iOS apps. She is focusing on making apps for social change in San Francisco, including one that connects restaurants that have excess food with food banks. Kai was also the inspiration for Black Girls Code, a national organization founded by her mother that encourages young African-American women to pursue tech careers.

Tell me about where you live. What does your bedroom look like?

"I live in an apartment on the fourth floor. My bedroom has a bed in the middle with lights over it. And then I have a desk with a giant computer with three monitors. Under my desk, I have my old laptop, iPad Pro, an iPad mini, a gigantic drawing tablet, another drawing tablet that's portable, and a huge pile of books. Next to my bed, I have a bass guitar, an amp, and two Xboxes. And in my closet I have every 'Goosebumps' book in existence."

How much time do you spend online per day?

"A lot. At least 70% of the day I think."

How do you use social media? What do you try to portray to people online?

"When I first got my Instagram account, it was all about posting what I was doing. But now, it's about creating your own aesthetic for your page and thinking when and what you want to post and what you want your image to be and how you want people to view you ... I want my photos to be good and portray my image and personality well. I see my mom's generation post a lot more random stuff ... I don't have a finsta [a secret, less curated Instagram account], but all my friends do."

What are you worried most about for your future?

"Getting into tech, I'm realizing that things are never going to be easy as a black woman. In STEM, and especially in the tech world, it's harder for women to have a voice, because it's been dominated by this white, male stereotype for so long ... But I'm not taking it as a disadvantage. I'm taking it as an opportunity to be the first and change the image that it's not just this white, male field. Hopefully a little girl interested in STEM will see me and feel inspired to not give up their dreams."

What would an ideal world would look like to you, 10 years from now?

"Finding a way to get humanity back into having moral values. Of course, it's hard to say 'no discrimination, no racism, and no prejudice,' because those are hard things. If we're talking about a utopia, I'd love to see less discrimination and diversity in all fields where anyone can see themselves reflected."

Joseph Touma, 19 — A conservative who wants to bridge the nation's political divide

One afternoon at a summer program, Joseph and his friend Clara Nevins were in a heated debate about climate change. Joseph, a West Virginia Republican, wants limited government regulations, while Clara, a California Democrat, values environmental regulation. They realized though, after they listened to each other, that they were able to understand each other's point of view more clearly.

Clara and Joseph founded an organization, called Bridge the Divide, that aims to make an increasingly polarized America recognize common ground. Its site features message boards where young people can debate political issues, and BTD has 100 student ambassadors in 22 countries.

Tell me about where you live.

"I've lived since I can remember in Huntington [West Virginia]. One of most notable, negative things about it is that there's an opioid epidemic. Some people call it the 'heroin capital of the world.' Just the other day, I was downtown, and the police pulled up and there were 50 or 60 needles all over the street. You see more and more of that every day. But we're also a community of resiliency and bouncing back."

How did you form your political views?

"My parents are very moderate but more recently have been becoming more conservative. I think they played a big role in me having the beliefs I have today, but they don't have all the same beliefs I do ... For example, I think that legalizing marijuana is not a bad thing. I don't plan on smoking marijuana, but it would be a great source of income for our state ... That's something my parents don't agree with me on."

What do you and your friends disagree on?

"I was talking with someone who was saying, 'We need to remember, members of ISIS are people too, and they have reasons behind their demands.' And I didn't see it the way she's seeing it, and she didn't change my perspective, but it was definitely a revelation to me."

What would an ideal world look like to you, 10 years from now?

"[Right now] while our leaders are at each other's throats, it's interesting how [teens] can be so loving to one other and civil. But for some reason, in the grander scheme of things, we are enemies ... In an ideal world, there would be an end to violence of any type, whether it's country-versus-country or individuals on the street."

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

[demitgibbs]

Gay Adoration: Why We’re Crazy for Actress Zoe Kazan

Why aren’t more gay men professing their love to Zoe Kazan?

I wonder this after doing just that. I dote on the 33-year-old film and theater actress – star of “Ruby Sparks,” “Revolutionary Road” and HBO’s “Olive Kitteridge” – like she’s my best girlfriend. Like we have history. Like we sip cosmos and talk about what it was like to play Meryl Streep’s daughter in “It’s Complicated.”

I don’t know Kazan, but I love that she’s so committed to being the best LGBT ally she can be that she follows me on Twitter after ending the interview by telling me, “I will say, just FYI, if you ever feel like I’m not being the greatest ally, please write me on Twitter. I really do feel like I want to do the best job I can.”

I love her socially-conscious Twitter feed. Love her latest statement film, “The Big Sick,” based on the real courtship of comedian Kumail Nanjiani and his now-wife, Emily Gordon, and the turmoil it causes when his family discovers Emily is white. I love her longtime boyfriend, the also supremely talented Paul Dano. And when Kazan tells me she wants to shine a spotlight on gay actors and prefers a gay actor play her romantic interest should she ever play a lesbian role herself, I love that too.

“I have never had a gay man profess his love to me before,” Kazan demures, somehow not kidding.

Universal gay adoration is inevitable as Kazan calls on powerful, white, cisgender filmmakers to make a mainstream gay rom-com, and talks about Dano’s onscreen kiss with Daniel Radcliffe and her very human reason for advocating for the LGBT community.  

Q: Growing up in Los Angeles, California, what was your earliest connection to the LGBT community?

A: I think I was really lucky to – yes, to grow up in a neighborhood that was very diverse and inclusive, and to grow up in a family that had those values. I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s, not as progressive of a time as now. I’m sure children today have it a lot better. But I went to a really progressive school with a lot of gay teachers and that wasn’t treated special or different. It just… was. Yeah, it just was. And I had two teachers who died of AIDS in the early and mid ’90s and that was something that was talked about really openly at my school. The school advocated for them and there was a real warmth and inclusiveness. I grew up a bit outside of the reality of the world at large at that point, so when I got into high school – and, again, this was the ’90s – people would be like, “That’s so gay,” and it was a rude awakening.

Q: Is it fair to say that because of your upbringing you’re woke when it comes to gay issues and queer stuff?

A: It is to my benefit as a human that everyone has equal rights and that gay people are treated with respect in the world. That’s the way in which it feels like my issue too. It matters deeply to me. So, if that’s woke, then I guess so. Not a word I use personally but, yeah, go for it!

Q: In addition to a post regarding gay musician Perfume Genius on your Twitter…

A: Oh my god, I love Perfume Genius! Honestly, all I wanted was to go to his concert and Paul didn’t make it happen. It’s a real point of contention in our relationship right now.  

Q: Ha! You are socially and politically active on Twitter as well, with posts about Planned Parenthood, feminism and one regarding the lack of acknowledgement about Pride month from Trump and his administration. It seems like this is a part of you even though you’re not gay.

A: I care deeply about it. Part of that is, as a feminist, I always sort of rankle when people are like, “I have a mother, I have a daughter” – no, you should care about this because of basic fundamental rights for, like, a huge portion of our population. I feel the same way about LGBTQ relations where, like I said, those rights are important to me as a human.

After this administration came into power in November, one of the first things I thought about was actually what happened to gay people under Reagan – the way he ignored the AIDS crisis and how that resulted in so many more deaths, especially in the gay community. And I really felt this thing of, well, yes, our rights recovered from that and our society recovered, but there was a huge cost and not everyone made it. And I thought of that when people were saying, “We’ll get through these four years.” I thought, “Well, not everybody will get through it.” And I think a lot of Republicans think of Reagan as a beaming icon of Republicanism. In fact, during the Democratic Convention, Democrats kept referencing him as being a good example of Republican values that Democrats also shared and I was like, does no one remember the AIDS crisis? He f*cked up.

Q: We tend to forget what history told us.

A: And also what casual bigotry results in. We’re saying that right now with the rise of hate crimes in this country and what happened to that poor Muslim girl (17-year-old Nabra Hassanen was assaulted and killed on June 18 after leaving a Virginia mosque). I know that’s not the direct responsibility of our president, but I am 100 percent certain that the atmosphere of hate that he has engendered set in those man’s actions.

WATCH:

Q: Let’s talk about compassion, and how your new film, “The Big Sick,” is steeped in it. As a gay man, I found myself completely empathizing with these characters in ways that I didn’t think I would. For you, how do you think the overarching themes of forbidden love and familial acceptance of another’s partners may resonate with LGBT audiences?

A: One thing that really speaks so much to me about the film is how much Kumail loves his family. He loves them and part of what is dividing them is a generational divide and their relationship with religion. I would guess that a lot of gay people growing up in really religious communities might feel like their religion could be a source of division between them and their families based on what some Christians, for instance, think of gay people. There’s a part of you that feels like they’ll love you no matter what and there’s a part of you that feels like they might excommunicate you from the family. I’m very moved by the scene in which he tells them that he’s not going to leave his family after he reveals himself to them. It feels really potent to me and I’m glad it spoke to you.

Q: When do you think we can have two gay people as leads in a major romantic comedy?

A: There’s no reason that time can’t be right now. And considering the current climate in this country politically, vis-à-vis Muslims, this feels as risky a movie as a movie with two gay leads. Maybe it’s not. Maybe I’m wrong about that. But Kumail and Emily were brave and told their own story, and a lot of people took a chance on them and got behind them. And they just tried to do the best job they could of telling their story. They weren’t just striving for representation – they had one story they were burning to tell.

I would just encourage everyone out there who is like, “Maybe my story isn’t mainstream enough,” to just do it. Work really hard. They worked on this script for three years before they brought anybody else on. This movie was started because Kumail was at some standup thing that Judd Apatow saw him at and Judd came up to him and was like, “Come in and pitch me every story that you have.” And Kumail went in and pitched and Judd was like, “That’s the one.” We need our allies. Especially people in power like Judd – straight, white men. We need them to step up and be like, “I’m gonna help you tell your story.” So to all the dudes out there in power: I think everybody is hungry to see a story that hasn’t been told a million times, and truly there’s no reason that can’t be right now for many more different kinds of people who are traditionally not as represented in popular culture.

Q: Not to put this weight on you, but you did write yourself a lead in “Ruby Sparks,” so surely you can just make this happen too, right?

A: (Laughs) I have to say I do think that my mind is turned more toward, “How can I be more responsible in who I’m putting in the spotlight?” Trying to think about casting that way. Trying to think about my writing that way. But I also think everybody’s gotta do it for themselves. I think back to writing “Ruby Sparks” and it’s crazy to me that at 25, or however old I was when I wrote that, that I was like, “Oh, we’re gonna get it financed, we’re gonna make this film,” without any sense of, “I shouldn’t be raising my voice.” I think a lot of people struggle with that, and it’s hard to do. It’s not easy. It requires a huge amount of hutzpah, but I think it’s more important now than ever.

Q: To speak out on issues?

A: And to have faith in yourself. One thing that is really hard for me is, I don’t think I give myself full power of what I already know. I will ask for permission or feel I need someone to come from on high. So, I would just stress that there are a lot of ways to get a film financed and there are actually so many people now who are finding ways to do that through creative channels, so don’t wait for someone to do it for you.

Q: If you were to play a lesbian in a romantic comedy, who would you want to cast as your romantic interest?

A: Robin Wright. I just love her. Or Juliette Binoche. Some beautiful woman of the generation before me. No – honestly, if I were going to make a movie I would probably find someone who’s actually gay. I think in terms of trying to be a good ally you want to give people an opportunity who don’t have the spotlight on them as much and who don’t have as many opportunities. I think that some people are marginalized for whatever reason for their sexuality and I would probably make an effort in that direction.

Q: Speaking of onscreen gayness: Paul famously kissed Daniel Radcliffe in “Swiss Army Man.” As his longtime girlfriend, how much say do you have as to which gay men he kisses on screen?

A: Very little! And honestly, I didn’t even know they kissed in that. I really didn’t! And then I saw some clips from it and I was like, “Oh, you guys make out.” And he was like, “No, we don’t.” And I go, “Yeah, you do.” He’s like, “But we’re saving each other’s lives!” He said something that made it seem like it was the purest love. (Laughs) It was so sweet. I loved that movie, and I love that scene! Kissing underwater – it’s so romantic.

Q: You have the best taste in rom-coms. What kind of romantic comedies won’t you do?

A: I have to say that when “The Big Sick” came along I was really not looking to do another romantic comedy. Like, I’ve done it. Also, it’s not really what I got into acting to do. I love to do parts that feel more transformative to me – much more of what I’ve gotten to do on stage from what I’ve gotten to do on film. Stuff like “Olive Kitteridge” is where my true hunger lies. So, when they called me and were like, “We have a script. It’s a romantic comedy. They want you to come in,” I read it and was like, “Oh, this is so good.” It felt like a movie I hadn’t seen before.

You know, it’s hard sometimes when you’re a working actor and you need to make a living. Sometimes a script comes to you and you’re like, it’s a little bit sexist, there’s something kind of racist in here, but I guess I can improv around it or I just won’t say that line. But now I have a much harder, faster rule when scripts come to me and the representation doesn’t feel totally great, and around gay issues too. I just don’t want to be an irreverent torchbearer for something I don’t believe in, especially now.

Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com.

from Hotspots! Magazine https://hotspotsmagazine.com/2017/08/09/gay-adoration-why-were-crazy-for-actress-zoe-kazan/ from Hot Spots Magazine https://hotspotsmagazine.tumblr.com/post/163993050775

[cynthiajayusa]

Gay Adoration: Why We’re Crazy for Actress Zoe Kazan

Why aren’t more gay men professing their love to Zoe Kazan?

I wonder this after doing just that. I dote on the 33-year-old film and theater actress – star of “Ruby Sparks,” “Revolutionary Road” and HBO’s “Olive Kitteridge” – like she’s my best girlfriend. Like we have history. Like we sip cosmos and talk about what it was like to play Meryl Streep’s daughter in “It’s Complicated.”

I don’t know Kazan, but I love that she’s so committed to being the best LGBT ally she can be that she follows me on Twitter after ending the interview by telling me, “I will say, just FYI, if you ever feel like I’m not being the greatest ally, please write me on Twitter. I really do feel like I want to do the best job I can.”

I love her socially-conscious Twitter feed. Love her latest statement film, “The Big Sick,” based on the real courtship of comedian Kumail Nanjiani and his now-wife, Emily Gordon, and the turmoil it causes when his family discovers Emily is white. I love her longtime boyfriend, the also supremely talented Paul Dano. And when Kazan tells me she wants to shine a spotlight on gay actors and prefers a gay actor play her romantic interest should she ever play a lesbian role herself, I love that too.

“I have never had a gay man profess his love to me before,” Kazan demures, somehow not kidding.

Universal gay adoration is inevitable as Kazan calls on powerful, white, cisgender filmmakers to make a mainstream gay rom-com, and talks about Dano’s onscreen kiss with Daniel Radcliffe and her very human reason for advocating for the LGBT community.  

Q: Growing up in Los Angeles, California, what was your earliest connection to the LGBT community?

A: I think I was really lucky to – yes, to grow up in a neighborhood that was very diverse and inclusive, and to grow up in a family that had those values. I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s, not as progressive of a time as now. I’m sure children today have it a lot better. But I went to a really progressive school with a lot of gay teachers and that wasn’t treated special or different. It just… was. Yeah, it just was. And I had two teachers who died of AIDS in the early and mid ’90s and that was something that was talked about really openly at my school. The school advocated for them and there was a real warmth and inclusiveness. I grew up a bit outside of the reality of the world at large at that point, so when I got into high school – and, again, this was the ’90s – people would be like, “That’s so gay,” and it was a rude awakening.

Q: Is it fair to say that because of your upbringing you’re woke when it comes to gay issues and queer stuff?

A: It is to my benefit as a human that everyone has equal rights and that gay people are treated with respect in the world. That’s the way in which it feels like my issue too. It matters deeply to me. So, if that’s woke, then I guess so. Not a word I use personally but, yeah, go for it!

Q: In addition to a post regarding gay musician Perfume Genius on your Twitter…

A: Oh my god, I love Perfume Genius! Honestly, all I wanted was to go to his concert and Paul didn’t make it happen. It’s a real point of contention in our relationship right now.  

Q: Ha! You are socially and politically active on Twitter as well, with posts about Planned Parenthood, feminism and one regarding the lack of acknowledgement about Pride month from Trump and his administration. It seems like this is a part of you even though you’re not gay.

A: I care deeply about it. Part of that is, as a feminist, I always sort of rankle when people are like, “I have a mother, I have a daughter” – no, you should care about this because of basic fundamental rights for, like, a huge portion of our population. I feel the same way about LGBTQ relations where, like I said, those rights are important to me as a human.

After this administration came into power in November, one of the first things I thought about was actually what happened to gay people under Reagan – the way he ignored the AIDS crisis and how that resulted in so many more deaths, especially in the gay community. And I really felt this thing of, well, yes, our rights recovered from that and our society recovered, but there was a huge cost and not everyone made it. And I thought of that when people were saying, “We’ll get through these four years.” I thought, “Well, not everybody will get through it.” And I think a lot of Republicans think of Reagan as a beaming icon of Republicanism. In fact, during the Democratic Convention, Democrats kept referencing him as being a good example of Republican values that Democrats also shared and I was like, does no one remember the AIDS crisis? He f*cked up.

Q: We tend to forget what history told us.

A: And also what casual bigotry results in. We’re saying that right now with the rise of hate crimes in this country and what happened to that poor Muslim girl (17-year-old Nabra Hassanen was assaulted and killed on June 18 after leaving a Virginia mosque). I know that’s not the direct responsibility of our president, but I am 100 percent certain that the atmosphere of hate that he has engendered set in those man’s actions.

WATCH:

Q: Let’s talk about compassion, and how your new film, “The Big Sick,” is steeped in it. As a gay man, I found myself completely empathizing with these characters in ways that I didn’t think I would. For you, how do you think the overarching themes of forbidden love and familial acceptance of another’s partners may resonate with LGBT audiences?

A: One thing that really speaks so much to me about the film is how much Kumail loves his family. He loves them and part of what is dividing them is a generational divide and their relationship with religion. I would guess that a lot of gay people growing up in really religious communities might feel like their religion could be a source of division between them and their families based on what some Christians, for instance, think of gay people. There’s a part of you that feels like they’ll love you no matter what and there’s a part of you that feels like they might excommunicate you from the family. I’m very moved by the scene in which he tells them that he’s not going to leave his family after he reveals himself to them. It feels really potent to me and I’m glad it spoke to you.

Q: When do you think we can have two gay people as leads in a major romantic comedy?

A: There’s no reason that time can’t be right now. And considering the current climate in this country politically, vis-à-vis Muslims, this feels as risky a movie as a movie with two gay leads. Maybe it’s not. Maybe I’m wrong about that. But Kumail and Emily were brave and told their own story, and a lot of people took a chance on them and got behind them. And they just tried to do the best job they could of telling their story. They weren’t just striving for representation – they had one story they were burning to tell.

I would just encourage everyone out there who is like, “Maybe my story isn’t mainstream enough,” to just do it. Work really hard. They worked on this script for three years before they brought anybody else on. This movie was started because Kumail was at some standup thing that Judd Apatow saw him at and Judd came up to him and was like, “Come in and pitch me every story that you have.” And Kumail went in and pitched and Judd was like, “That’s the one.” We need our allies. Especially people in power like Judd – straight, white men. We need them to step up and be like, “I’m gonna help you tell your story.” So to all the dudes out there in power: I think everybody is hungry to see a story that hasn’t been told a million times, and truly there’s no reason that can’t be right now for many more different kinds of people who are traditionally not as represented in popular culture.

Q: Not to put this weight on you, but you did write yourself a lead in “Ruby Sparks,” so surely you can just make this happen too, right?

A: (Laughs) I have to say I do think that my mind is turned more toward, “How can I be more responsible in who I’m putting in the spotlight?” Trying to think about casting that way. Trying to think about my writing that way. But I also think everybody’s gotta do it for themselves. I think back to writing “Ruby Sparks” and it’s crazy to me that at 25, or however old I was when I wrote that, that I was like, “Oh, we’re gonna get it financed, we’re gonna make this film,” without any sense of, “I shouldn’t be raising my voice.” I think a lot of people struggle with that, and it’s hard to do. It’s not easy. It requires a huge amount of hutzpah, but I think it’s more important now than ever.

Q: To speak out on issues?

A: And to have faith in yourself. One thing that is really hard for me is, I don’t think I give myself full power of what I already know. I will ask for permission or feel I need someone to come from on high. So, I would just stress that there are a lot of ways to get a film financed and there are actually so many people now who are finding ways to do that through creative channels, so don’t wait for someone to do it for you.

Q: If you were to play a lesbian in a romantic comedy, who would you want to cast as your romantic interest?

A: Robin Wright. I just love her. Or Juliette Binoche. Some beautiful woman of the generation before me. No – honestly, if I were going to make a movie I would probably find someone who’s actually gay. I think in terms of trying to be a good ally you want to give people an opportunity who don’t have the spotlight on them as much and who don’t have as many opportunities. I think that some people are marginalized for whatever reason for their sexuality and I would probably make an effort in that direction.

Q: Speaking of onscreen gayness: Paul famously kissed Daniel Radcliffe in “Swiss Army Man.” As his longtime girlfriend, how much say do you have as to which gay men he kisses on screen?

A: Very little! And honestly, I didn’t even know they kissed in that. I really didn’t! And then I saw some clips from it and I was like, “Oh, you guys make out.” And he was like, “No, we don’t.” And I go, “Yeah, you do.” He’s like, “But we’re saving each other’s lives!” He said something that made it seem like it was the purest love. (Laughs) It was so sweet. I loved that movie, and I love that scene! Kissing underwater – it’s so romantic.

Q: You have the best taste in rom-coms. What kind of romantic comedies won’t you do?

A: I have to say that when “The Big Sick” came along I was really not looking to do another romantic comedy. Like, I’ve done it. Also, it’s not really what I got into acting to do. I love to do parts that feel more transformative to me – much more of what I’ve gotten to do on stage from what I’ve gotten to do on film. Stuff like “Olive Kitteridge” is where my true hunger lies. So, when they called me and were like, “We have a script. It’s a romantic comedy. They want you to come in,” I read it and was like, “Oh, this is so good.” It felt like a movie I hadn’t seen before.

You know, it’s hard sometimes when you’re a working actor and you need to make a living. Sometimes a script comes to you and you’re like, it’s a little bit sexist, there’s something kind of racist in here, but I guess I can improv around it or I just won’t say that line. But now I have a much harder, faster rule when scripts come to me and the representation doesn’t feel totally great, and around gay issues too. I just don’t want to be an irreverent torchbearer for something I don’t believe in, especially now.

Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com.

source https://hotspotsmagazine.com/2017/08/09/gay-adoration-why-were-crazy-for-actress-zoe-kazan/ from Hot Spots Magazine http://hotspotsmagazin.blogspot.com/2017/08/gay-adoration-why-were-crazy-for.html

[hotspotsmagazine]

Gay Adoration: Why We’re Crazy for Actress Zoe Kazan

Why aren’t more gay men professing their love to Zoe Kazan?

I wonder this after doing just that. I dote on the 33-year-old film and theater actress – star of “Ruby Sparks,” “Revolutionary Road” and HBO’s “Olive Kitteridge” – like she’s my best girlfriend. Like we have history. Like we sip cosmos and talk about what it was like to play Meryl Streep’s daughter in “It’s Complicated.”

I don’t know Kazan, but I love that she’s so committed to being the best LGBT ally she can be that she follows me on Twitter after ending the interview by telling me, “I will say, just FYI, if you ever feel like I’m not being the greatest ally, please write me on Twitter. I really do feel like I want to do the best job I can.”

I love her socially-conscious Twitter feed. Love her latest statement film, “The Big Sick,” based on the real courtship of comedian Kumail Nanjiani and his now-wife, Emily Gordon, and the turmoil it causes when his family discovers Emily is white. I love her longtime boyfriend, the also supremely talented Paul Dano. And when Kazan tells me she wants to shine a spotlight on gay actors and prefers a gay actor play her romantic interest should she ever play a lesbian role herself, I love that too.

“I have never had a gay man profess his love to me before,” Kazan demures, somehow not kidding.

Universal gay adoration is inevitable as Kazan calls on powerful, white, cisgender filmmakers to make a mainstream gay rom-com, and talks about Dano’s onscreen kiss with Daniel Radcliffe and her very human reason for advocating for the LGBT community.  

Q: Growing up in Los Angeles, California, what was your earliest connection to the LGBT community?

A: I think I was really lucky to – yes, to grow up in a neighborhood that was very diverse and inclusive, and to grow up in a family that had those values. I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s, not as progressive of a time as now. I’m sure children today have it a lot better. But I went to a really progressive school with a lot of gay teachers and that wasn’t treated special or different. It just… was. Yeah, it just was. And I had two teachers who died of AIDS in the early and mid ’90s and that was something that was talked about really openly at my school. The school advocated for them and there was a real warmth and inclusiveness. I grew up a bit outside of the reality of the world at large at that point, so when I got into high school – and, again, this was the ’90s – people would be like, “That’s so gay,” and it was a rude awakening.

Q: Is it fair to say that because of your upbringing you’re woke when it comes to gay issues and queer stuff?

A: It is to my benefit as a human that everyone has equal rights and that gay people are treated with respect in the world. That’s the way in which it feels like my issue too. It matters deeply to me. So, if that’s woke, then I guess so. Not a word I use personally but, yeah, go for it!

Q: In addition to a post regarding gay musician Perfume Genius on your Twitter…

A: Oh my god, I love Perfume Genius! Honestly, all I wanted was to go to his concert and Paul didn’t make it happen. It’s a real point of contention in our relationship right now.  

Q: Ha! You are socially and politically active on Twitter as well, with posts about Planned Parenthood, feminism and one regarding the lack of acknowledgement about Pride month from Trump and his administration. It seems like this is a part of you even though you’re not gay.

A: I care deeply about it. Part of that is, as a feminist, I always sort of rankle when people are like, “I have a mother, I have a daughter” – no, you should care about this because of basic fundamental rights for, like, a huge portion of our population. I feel the same way about LGBTQ relations where, like I said, those rights are important to me as a human.

After this administration came into power in November, one of the first things I thought about was actually what happened to gay people under Reagan – the way he ignored the AIDS crisis and how that resulted in so many more deaths, especially in the gay community. And I really felt this thing of, well, yes, our rights recovered from that and our society recovered, but there was a huge cost and not everyone made it. And I thought of that when people were saying, “We’ll get through these four years.” I thought, “Well, not everybody will get through it.” And I think a lot of Republicans think of Reagan as a beaming icon of Republicanism. In fact, during the Democratic Convention, Democrats kept referencing him as being a good example of Republican values that Democrats also shared and I was like, does no one remember the AIDS crisis? He f*cked up.

Q: We tend to forget what history told us.

A: And also what casual bigotry results in. We’re saying that right now with the rise of hate crimes in this country and what happened to that poor Muslim girl (17-year-old Nabra Hassanen was assaulted and killed on June 18 after leaving a Virginia mosque). I know that’s not the direct responsibility of our president, but I am 100 percent certain that the atmosphere of hate that he has engendered set in those man’s actions.

WATCH:

Q: Let’s talk about compassion, and how your new film, “The Big Sick,” is steeped in it. As a gay man, I found myself completely empathizing with these characters in ways that I didn’t think I would. For you, how do you think the overarching themes of forbidden love and familial acceptance of another’s partners may resonate with LGBT audiences?

A: One thing that really speaks so much to me about the film is how much Kumail loves his family. He loves them and part of what is dividing them is a generational divide and their relationship with religion. I would guess that a lot of gay people growing up in really religious communities might feel like their religion could be a source of division between them and their families based on what some Christians, for instance, think of gay people. There’s a part of you that feels like they’ll love you no matter what and there’s a part of you that feels like they might excommunicate you from the family. I’m very moved by the scene in which he tells them that he’s not going to leave his family after he reveals himself to them. It feels really potent to me and I’m glad it spoke to you.

Q: When do you think we can have two gay people as leads in a major romantic comedy?

A: There’s no reason that time can’t be right now. And considering the current climate in this country politically, vis-à-vis Muslims, this feels as risky a movie as a movie with two gay leads. Maybe it’s not. Maybe I’m wrong about that. But Kumail and Emily were brave and told their own story, and a lot of people took a chance on them and got behind them. And they just tried to do the best job they could of telling their story. They weren’t just striving for representation – they had one story they were burning to tell.

I would just encourage everyone out there who is like, “Maybe my story isn’t mainstream enough,” to just do it. Work really hard. They worked on this script for three years before they brought anybody else on. This movie was started because Kumail was at some standup thing that Judd Apatow saw him at and Judd came up to him and was like, “Come in and pitch me every story that you have.” And Kumail went in and pitched and Judd was like, “That’s the one.” We need our allies. Especially people in power like Judd – straight, white men. We need them to step up and be like, “I’m gonna help you tell your story.” So to all the dudes out there in power: I think everybody is hungry to see a story that hasn’t been told a million times, and truly there’s no reason that can’t be right now for many more different kinds of people who are traditionally not as represented in popular culture.

Q: Not to put this weight on you, but you did write yourself a lead in “Ruby Sparks,” so surely you can just make this happen too, right?

A: (Laughs) I have to say I do think that my mind is turned more toward, “How can I be more responsible in who I’m putting in the spotlight?” Trying to think about casting that way. Trying to think about my writing that way. But I also think everybody’s gotta do it for themselves. I think back to writing “Ruby Sparks” and it’s crazy to me that at 25, or however old I was when I wrote that, that I was like, “Oh, we’re gonna get it financed, we’re gonna make this film,” without any sense of, “I shouldn’t be raising my voice.” I think a lot of people struggle with that, and it’s hard to do. It’s not easy. It requires a huge amount of hutzpah, but I think it’s more important now than ever.

Q: To speak out on issues?

A: And to have faith in yourself. One thing that is really hard for me is, I don’t think I give myself full power of what I already know. I will ask for permission or feel I need someone to come from on high. So, I would just stress that there are a lot of ways to get a film financed and there are actually so many people now who are finding ways to do that through creative channels, so don’t wait for someone to do it for you.

Q: If you were to play a lesbian in a romantic comedy, who would you want to cast as your romantic interest?

A: Robin Wright. I just love her. Or Juliette Binoche. Some beautiful woman of the generation before me. No – honestly, if I were going to make a movie I would probably find someone who’s actually gay. I think in terms of trying to be a good ally you want to give people an opportunity who don’t have the spotlight on them as much and who don’t have as many opportunities. I think that some people are marginalized for whatever reason for their sexuality and I would probably make an effort in that direction.

Q: Speaking of onscreen gayness: Paul famously kissed Daniel Radcliffe in “Swiss Army Man.” As his longtime girlfriend, how much say do you have as to which gay men he kisses on screen?

A: Very little! And honestly, I didn’t even know they kissed in that. I really didn’t! And then I saw some clips from it and I was like, “Oh, you guys make out.” And he was like, “No, we don’t.” And I go, “Yeah, you do.” He’s like, “But we’re saving each other’s lives!” He said something that made it seem like it was the purest love. (Laughs) It was so sweet. I loved that movie, and I love that scene! Kissing underwater – it’s so romantic.

Q: You have the best taste in rom-coms. What kind of romantic comedies won’t you do?

A: I have to say that when “The Big Sick” came along I was really not looking to do another romantic comedy. Like, I’ve done it. Also, it’s not really what I got into acting to do. I love to do parts that feel more transformative to me – much more of what I’ve gotten to do on stage from what I’ve gotten to do on film. Stuff like “Olive Kitteridge” is where my true hunger lies. So, when they called me and were like, “We have a script. It’s a romantic comedy. They want you to come in,” I read it and was like, “Oh, this is so good.” It felt like a movie I hadn’t seen before.

You know, it’s hard sometimes when you’re a working actor and you need to make a living. Sometimes a script comes to you and you’re like, it’s a little bit sexist, there’s something kind of racist in here, but I guess I can improv around it or I just won’t say that line. But now I have a much harder, faster rule when scripts come to me and the representation doesn’t feel totally great, and around gay issues too. I just don’t want to be an irreverent torchbearer for something I don’t believe in, especially now.

Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com.

from Hotspots! Magazine https://hotspotsmagazine.com/2017/08/09/gay-adoration-why-were-crazy-for-actress-zoe-kazan/

[ramialkarmi]

10 teens across America reveal what their lives are like and what they think about the country

Those who make up Generation Z — generally defined as those born after 1995 — are coming of age after the Great Recession and the September 11, 2001 attacks. They do not remember a US president before Barack Obama, or life without the iPhone. Everything has always been one tap away.

At approximately 60 million, Generation Z Americans outnumber millennials by nearly 1 million. Compared with their predecessors, members of Gen Z are true digital natives, with 92% having a digital footprint on social media and the web. But that doesn't mean they overshare. Teens are more likely to curate their profiles than their parents, who just put everything up.

They're also highly entrepreneurial (72% of teens say they want to start a business someday) and are working and driving less than past generations. Nearly half of Gen Z is also not white, making it the most ethnically diverse generation in history.

And while many American adults identify as being on either the right or the left on the political spectrum, a 2016 survey of 150,000 teens found that most say they are both: socially liberal and moderate but also moderate to conservative financially.

"They want a balanced budget, but they want universal healthcare — things that other generations have seen as opposing or a choice. They see them as one or want both," Corey Seemiller, a Wright State University professor who studies Gen Z, told Business Insider.

But, as with any generation, there's a great amount of diversity within teenage America, too.

Business Insider spoke with teens from across the US with different hometowns, political views, and socioeconomic backgrounds about their lifestyles, hopes, and worries.

Below, check out personal stories from 10 American teens, who are trying to create America's future right now.

SEE ALSO: Teens from across the country reveal the 11 companies they think are cool

Max Doocy, 17 — A male, Catholic feminist with two moms

In his conservative town of Omaha, Nebraska, Max helps lead a club that started in the '70s, called Prep Accepts, at his Catholic high school. The club acts as a space where students discuss how to make the school more inclusive. Topics include abortion, racism, and same-sex marriage — the latter of which is personally significant to Max, who has two gay moms, Carol and Laura.

But in 2015, the school threatened to shut the club down after wealthy donors in the area said they would withdraw funding. Max immediately sent a letter to the local archbishop and met with the school president, who reinstated Prep Accepts. This school year, Max said more white, non-LGBT students showed up to meetings.

Tell me about where you live. What do you like most about it?

"There's a lot of businesspeople and a lot of old money and not as many cornfields as people think. Omaha is known for mansions, because they're much cheaper here. Coming from California, we bought a 7,000-square-foot house with seven bedrooms for the amount of money a down payment was in Alameda ... I like that it has a small-town feel. People are really nice to each other — and let you cut them off in traffic and not freak out."

Do you feel like you fit in?

"I don't like how conservative it is. People are usually open-minded, but religion is used as a basis for being judgmental."

Have you ever faced discrimination? 

"I went to a Catholic elementary school. When it went public that I have two moms, it was a big problem. [The students] were called to the church on campus, and the archbishop of our area talked about how homosexuality and homosexual actions are against God and that as a church community they needed to come together and act against it and not support families who support it, and that was pretty much me ... I remember sitting there thinking, 'What does this mean for my family? How do I deal with it?'" 

Are you a feminist?

"Yep. It's something that makes a lot of guys uncomfortable, but I would not think twice about answering that as a 'yes.'"

Do you think the American dream is still alive?

"Yeah, I think so. I think it is what you make of it. If you want to think that it's not, it won't be. But if you think it is and work for it, anything is open."

Kai Morton, 18 — A coder who wants to make social change

Kai programmed her first video game when she was 11 years old on a big, purple, clunky laptop. In the game, players jump from platform to platform to collect bugs.

Today, at 18, she knows 15 coding languages and is learning how to develop iOS apps. She is focusing on making apps for social change in San Francisco, including one that connects restaurants that have excess food with food banks. Kai was also the inspiration for Black Girls Code, a national organization founded by her mother that encourages young African-American women to pursue tech careers.

Tell me about where you live. What does your bedroom look like?

"I live in an apartment on the fourth floor. My bedroom has a bed in the middle with lights over it. And then I have a desk with a giant computer with three monitors. Under my desk, I have my old laptop, iPad Pro, an iPad mini, a gigantic drawing tablet, another drawing tablet that's portable, and a huge pile of books. Next to my bed, I have a bass guitar, an amp, and two Xboxes. And in my closet I have every 'Goosebumps' book in existence."

How much time do you spend online per day?

"A lot. At least 70% of the day I think."

How do you use social media? What do you try to portray to people online?

"When I first got my Instagram account, it was all about posting what I was doing. But now, it's about creating your own aesthetic for your page and thinking when and what you want to post and what you want your image to be and how you want people to view you ... I want my photos to be good and portray my image and personality well. I see my mom's generation post a lot more random stuff ... I don't have a finsta [a secret, less curated Instagram account], but all my friends do."

What are you worried most about for your future?

"Getting into tech, I'm realizing that things are never going to be easy as a black woman. In STEM, and especially in the tech world, it's harder for women to have a voice, because it's been dominated by this white, male stereotype for so long ... But I'm not taking it as a disadvantage. I'm taking it as an opportunity to be the first and change the image that it's not just this white, male field. Hopefully a little girl interested in STEM will see me and feel inspired to not give up their dreams."

What would an ideal world would look like to you, 10 years from now?

"Finding a way to get humanity back into having moral values. Of course, it's hard to say 'no discrimination, no racism, and no prejudice,' because those are hard things. If we're talking about a utopia, I'd love to see less discrimination and diversity in all fields where anyone can see themselves reflected."

Joseph Touma, 19 — A conservative who wants to bridge the nation's political divide

One afternoon at a summer program, Joseph and his friend Clara Nevins were in a heated debate about climate change. Joseph, a West Virginia Republican, wants limited government regulations, while Clara, a California Democrat, values environmental regulation. They realized though, after they listened to each other, that they were able to understand each other's point of view more clearly.

Clara and Joseph founded an organization, called Bridge the Divide, that aims to make an increasingly polarized America recognize common ground. Its site features message boards where young people can debate political issues, and BTD has 100 student ambassadors in 22 countries.

Tell me about where you live.

"I've lived since I can remember in Huntington [West Virginia]. One of most notable, negative things about it is that there's an opioid epidemic. Some people call it the 'heroin capital of the world.' Just the other day, I was downtown, and the police pulled up and there were 50 or 60 needles all over the street. You see more and more of that every day. But we're also a community of resiliency and bouncing back."

How did you form your political views?

"My parents are very moderate but more recently have been becoming more conservative. I think they played a big role in me having the beliefs I have today, but they don't have all the same beliefs I do ... For example, I think that legalizing marijuana is not a bad thing. I don't plan on smoking marijuana, but it would be a great source of income for our state ... That's something my parents don't agree with me on."

What do you and your friends disagree on?

"I was talking with someone who was saying, 'We need to remember, members of ISIS are people too, and they have reasons behind their demands.' And I didn't see it the way she's seeing it, and she didn't change my perspective, but it was definitely a revelation to me."

What would an ideal world look like to you, 10 years from now?

"[Right now] while our leaders are at each other's throats, it's interesting how [teens] can be so loving to one other and civil. But for some reason, in the grander scheme of things, we are enemies ... In an ideal world, there would be an end to violence of any type, whether it's country-versus-country or individuals on the street."

See the rest of the story at Business Insider