#also this is obviously not about people writing actual like illegal and/or bigoted shit

[zapasnoysoldat]

Sometimes I hop onto a largely inactive blog to just check some tags or whatever, and I see someone I follow posting something discourse-y and "look at my moral high horse"-y and I'm just like "oh. oh, no". Because like, if there's one thing I've learned in my 10+ years on this hellsite, it's that I am just here to write and ship fictional characters and that's it. I don't need dragging into "if you do x you are z" kind of stuff. The real world is already full enough of people wanting to yell at you, I really don't need it here as well.

I've literally blocked mutuals over this before. I'm almost 30 fucking years old, guys. I've got a heavy af job with lots of awful shit happening every single day. Along with staying aware of all the other bad shit happening out there. The last thing I need is yelling and hate and discourse about silly little fictional people who fly on dragons or fight supervillains or can do magic. Sometimes, it's just really not that deep.

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

have you ever dressed up for halloween or for like a costume party? what's your favorite thing you've worn? do you like wearing jewelry? do you listen to podcasts?what's an interesting historical event you know a little about? when do you feel the most comfortable? do you have any piercings or tattoos? Are there any you'd like to get? what's one thing you're proud of?

Wow, All in huh??? SO MANY QUESTIONS.

1) Have I ever dressed up for halloween or for a costume party? NNNNNNNNOT REALLY. I wasn’t allowed to do Halloween after the age of like. Five? Because my parents got MORE religious than they’d already been and they decided halloween was evil. And then as an adult I didn’t have a lot of local friends or money so... not really most of the time. BUT! There was ONE YEAR when I was in my mid-20s, that my wife and I went to a Halloween party with some local friends. She was Death of the Endless, we dyed her hair black, I did her eye makeup, there was a cardboard-covered-in-tinfoil ankh necklace and everything. I that year dressed up as Delirium to go with her. I bought fishnets that I tore a couple holes in, had some clompy boots, bought a skirt and shirt at the thrift store, and dyed my hair... like Half of it was red, half of it was just random spots of bleached, blue, and green. (I actually went to a job interview the next day and frantically reassured the interviewer that I was bleaching my hair and dying it a more natural color later that week) It was very fun as a costume tho. OH tho last year for halloween I loaned my wife a purple dress I sewed for myself and we got her some white tights and a white scarf, and I dug out my purple henley and and jeans some bandaids for my face and fingers, and we went as Hawkeye for Halloween. She was Kate Bishop and I was Clint Barton. That was probably my favorite even tho it was so low-effort. 1.5) On its own line, I think this “what’s the fave you’ve worn” was meant to be about the costumes, which I answered above, but IN GENERAL the thing I’ve worn that’s my favorite has been

Do I like wearing jewelry? I do like wearing jewelry! I need to get new earrings bc the ones I had got lost, but I used to always wear like, small gauge horseshoe earrings with the balls that screw onto the ends? I just lost the balls on the ends. I also wear a necklace every day. And I used to have a wedding band but I don’t have one that fits currently and it drives me NUTS bc even years without it I feel  like I should have a ring on that finger.

Do I listen to podcasts? I listen to podcasts off and on! Mostly MBMBAM, The Magnus Archives, The Penumbra Podcast, and Faculty of Horror. We relisten to early WtNV to sleep sometimes, and I keep meaning to catch up on TAZ, but that’s not active yet.

What’s an interesting historical event I know something about? ...Gosh that’s hard. Like, I know some stuff about historical eras or cultures but EVENTS??? Hmmm... I. Fuck. I abruptly cannot think of ANY HISTORICAL EVENT AT ALL. I’m a fucking History Major this is embarrassing. Uh okay so... I can’t think of anything. I’m so sorry. XD

When do I feel most comfortable? When I’m curled up in bed and have Birdie pressed against my back with her arm around my waist. Bonus points for literally any of our other partners in bed as well, but that happens so rarely. :(

Do I have any piercings or tattoos? I DO! Piercings are easiest. I have my left lobe pierced 3 times (though all but the first might be closed) and my right 2 times (tho ditto), and the upper shell of my left ear once (but again, closed). TATTOOS gosh, ok I have, in chronological order: a) a sort of cross between a cross and a peace sign on the inside of my left ankle. I got it when I was 18 and still a Good Christian Girl, my church bff designed it, it stood for peace in Christ, and the only thing stopping me from trying to get a coverup is the fact that it’s REALLY heavy/thick black work, and the location which was really painful. b) the kanji 天使 (which translates to “angel”) on my right inner forearm, over self harm scars specifically. I got this when I was 19 and back living with my bigoted conservative family and suicidal and trying to remind myself that I was loved. I also picked it out of a book and was lucky that book had the right kanji tbh, but I picked it bc my parents wouldn’t be able to read it, and it meant “angel” which was Birdie’s pet name for me at the time, and she was living across the country from me. If I could go back, I would get a different angel-themed tattoo in the same place, but at least I have the proper kanji for it if I’m going to have an ill-advised Japanese tattoo. c) a little curled ivy tramp stamp I picked out of a book in a little tattoo shop on St. Mark’s Place in NYC at like 2am, do NOT ask, it was dumb. Thankfully easier to work into a larger piece if I ever have the money for a back piece. d) text that is now near-illegible (due to the delicate nature of the script and the time since I got it) on the back of my left shoulder. It says “the universe has been waiting for me” in Birdie’s handwriting. It’s a line from Donna Noble’s last episode of Doctor Who, and I had FEELINGS. e) text on the inside of my left wrist that says “alive or dead, the truth won’t rest.” specifically in courier new. It’s a quote from @seananmcguire​‘s book FEED, and Birdie has a matching tattoo on her wrist as well. f) A tattoo of Coyote and the Sun, with color, on the outer side of my right calf. It’s the only colored Tattoo I have. I plan to get a semi-matching tattoo on my left calf that is El-Ahrairah and the Black Rabbit of Inle doing sort of a yin-yang esque circle chasing each other. it’s a Trickster thing, tying animals commonly considered  to be Tricksters with stuff that is meaningful to me. Coyotes have always been important to me, I grew up in Arizona there were always coyotes about and I always loved them, and then Watership Down was a surprise true love of a book when I was a teen.

Are there any piercings/tattoos I’d like to get? Piercings not so much. Maybe an eyebrow one day idk. Tattoos tho, goddamn, I’ve got SO MANY PLANS. I want to get text tattoos - either part of a larger text-heavy design or separately - of “It’s chaos, be kind”, “You are not obligated to complete the work, neither are you free to abandon it”, and “Do good recklessly”. Other quotes I’m sure but those three specifically. Obviously the Watership Down/Rabbit the Trickster tattoo I mentioned. Also a design from one of the tattoos on one of the guards of the Pazyriyk ice maiden. Also ngl I kinda want to get the sigils for witcher signs on the backs of my fingers. Some people get “THUG LYFE” or “FUCK YOU”, I get “I WILL FUCK YOU UP (in symbolic form)” XD

What’s one thing I’m proud of? The fact that I’m alive. ...Seriously, I’m quite proud of that, I’ve had some shit years in my life, and I’ve nearly not made it more than once. I’m proud as HELL that I’m here. I’m proud that I’m in college. I’m proud that I’m writing again.

Thank you for all these questions! So many, lmao, but I loved it, thank you. ^_^

[dicecast]

Blast from the Past: Dragon Age II, Why the Mage Templar Conflict Fails

So Dragon Age II is the best game in the series (I will fight you) and has the best writing in the entire narrative thus far...but dear god the Mage Templar Conflict is handled terrible.  This is also true of inquisition, but it is the main focus of II and I think that is a major reason why people have so many problems with DA:II, because for all of its greatness, so much of the narrative is based on this aspect which just...doesn’t work. 

So why is that?  I mean the Mage/Templar dynamic was one of the few things in DA;O which is better than DA:II, and there are some really powerful moments involving the conflict in DA:II so why does the overall effort just fall flat?  Wait, I know the answer because I am awesome

Basically there were 5 different ways you could have handled this conflict and any one of those could have been a workable story in their own right.  But Bioware in their infinite wisdom tried to do all of them and...it was a mess.  So I am going to break down the various narratives that could have been and how that should have been told, and why DA:II just doesn’t work 

1) A conflict between two equal forces

So the obvious narrative (and the most typical) is present this as a conflict between two roughly equal powers each with valid points, each side has bad elements and each side has some good elements, a very Grey vs. Grey type deal.   The player is encouraged to choose which group they/their character personally feels is more valid, but the game is making it clear that the other side is understandable.  There is no true good or evil option in terms of which faction you choose.   The themes would likely be something like “oh no, look how extremism tears people apart, isn’t it terrible when people won’t listen to the other side” or the same golden mean pablum RPGs do with these sort of narrative 

  Why this doesn’t work

Well right away, there is the problem where both sides aren’t in fact equal in terms of power. Like at all.  The Templar are organized, have the support of the entire society including the church, most of the populace hates mages, and the mages literally are trapped inside a prison tower.  The mages are not organized, they don’t have any resources outside their own magic, and of course the Templars can basically mistreat them with impunity (which literally contradicts lore from the first game I might add). You really can’t view this as “Both sides have a point” when the Templars under Maredith are regularly raping, tranquilizing, and just generally abusing the mages. 

    And what really just kills this “both sides have a point” style conflict is the final choice because...the mages didn’t blow up the CHantry.  Anders did it, who is a renegade who explicitly says he is independent.  We literally see the head mage both trying to appeal to the Grand Cleric right before and go “WTF man” right after, hawk knows full well that the mages did not do this.  So Meredith’s choice to massacre all of the mages (including children) is just loony, like we know full well that she is killing innocent people for a crime they didn’t commit.  Even when I play a pro templar hawk I can never really bring myself to side with Meredith because not only is she an obviously crazy evil lunatic with no redeeming qualities, but I can’t imagine any way my character would murder thousands of innocent people for no reason without seeming out of character.  I couldn’t even imagine Fenris doing that.  

   This conflict just can’t be “Both sides have a point” because Meredith is just too fucking psychotic for anybody to really side with her.  Unlike Ser Gregor from the first game, Meredith constantly breaks the rules of the chantry itself because she is a paranoid sadist.  She uses the rite of tranquility for things that we know in universe the templars shouldn’t use it for, like people speaking out.  There is rampant sexual abuse, torture, and...look my point is that the Templars are way too evil and cruel for this to be an equal conflict.

Like if this was Tevinter vs. the Templars, that would be one thing, but this isn’t an equal conflict, when one side is literally locked in their prison, 

If Dragon Age wanted this to be a moral situation where neither side was necessarily right or wrong, than they needed to make the conflict more nuanced, the templars should be more like they were in one, and the mages should have actually been doing evil shit, rather than a rogue terrorist.  And the final conflict shouldn’t have been “massacre everybody for crime they didn’t commit.”

2) Mages are Right, but lets Understand the Templars

DA:II is obviously trying to tell a story about bigotry and oppression, and at parts sets out to do so in a mature and serious way, and try to explain why the Templars behave as they do.  After all, just because a work disagrees with a character doesn’t mean it can’t depict them in a human and understandable way.  Dragon Age II could have been trying to explain exactly wy pepole believe things that the game views as wrong, to say “ok yeah, the Templars are wrong, but lets understand their perspective, after all they aren’t cartoonish monsters but people”.  And parts of the game seem to do that, for example Fenris is like an anti mage bigot (Magist ?) in a really unacceptable way but he is very understandable. He came from a really bad background and is lashing out his own feelings against the vague group that hurt him, and he is utterly terrified of Tevinter coming to southern Thedas.  He is wrong, but the game doesn’t wish to demonize him and wants us to understand how these prejudices grow.  We see a similar treatment with Cullen, whose experience in the Origins Circle tower has made him see everything in an extremely black and white perspective, and we pity him even as he commits evil. 

Where it went wrong

Well...Meredith is just too fucking awful....again.  Unlike many of her minions, she is just kind of an asshole all the way through, from her first appearance she is haughty, callous, paranoid, indifferent and ambitious.  We never really see her reasoning or psychology, yeah I know we are told about tragedy  in her back story but it never really comes up in scene. She just kinda does awful things because she is an awful person, nothing more complicated than that.  For example, punishing people speaking out against her with Tranquility (which again is suppose to be illegal) just makes her out to be a despot, we don’t really see any reason to support her or sympathize with her.  And anybody who stays loyal to her comes off as an idiot.

   This also makes Grand Cleric Elthina just come off as a complete tool btw, if the Templars are acting out of bounds then the Chanty needs to pull the lease.  Again and again Meredith is violating Chantry rules, and Elthina just doesn’t do anything about it, the chantry is strangely passive in all this.  

3) Templars bad, Mages response isn’t appropriate 

Another approach the game could have done what the Witcher I did, the system perpetuated by the templars is evil and wrong, and really not acceptable, but the mages response to said system isn’t good.  The game kinda does this with Anders, who has a very valid point but his extremism makes the whole situation worse and also makes him really unacceptable as a person.  Basically ‘Man the Templars are awful and we need to fix this.....why did you blow up the Chantry Anders?”

This version doesn’t actually contradict version 2 btw.  Personally I think 2 and 3 combined would be the best way to handle this game

Where it Went Wrong 

Well....Anders is the only real anti Templar mage who gets a lot of narrative focus...and he is  renegade.  I know we run into evil mages who do evil mage things over the course of the game but they are just kinda cartoonishly awful rather than you know...interesting.   This narrative would require a lot more focus on the mage resistance and mage responses to the templars in a more human light.

And no, the massive amount of evil Blood Mages don’t count, they are just kind randomly evil douchbags who don’t relate to anything else in the story.  

4) Both sides need to come together and unite

In this narrative the conflict is the result of am misunderstanding, and if the two sides just saw thigns from the other’s perspective, a compromise could be reached, and the true evil could be destroyed.  Honestly this is the narrative where Meredith makes the most sense, a force of evil that the mages and the templars could unify to fight against because she is so utterly awful.  THe ending kinda implies this ending with the templars all going “screw you” to Meredith  and her going all Red Lyrium, 

Where it went wrong

but then we have a stupid binary moral choice.  Enough Said

5) The Templars are totally wrong, VIVA LA REVOLUTION

Finally the game could have just been very black and white, the templars are bad, the Circles are an evil, the mages should rise to fight against their oppressors. 

Where it went wrong 

This is the only other narrative where Meredith makes sense, and this story would be very clear cut.  But again...the presence of Fenris, Cullen and Aveline really implies that this is suppose to be a more complicated conflict than that.