#also v much missing the comedy reaction to the “if i fuck you” cause i ran out of space rip

[threeshadesoflime]

RAHHH I LOVE THEM

[prxttylittle]

‘ you have a nice laugh. ’ , ‘ you could stay here. with me. ’, ‘ i know you think you’re all alone out there, but you’re not. ’

“You have a nice laugh.”

{ v ;; the princess and the moon. 

       It wasn’t the most common sight; Prince almost keeling over with laughter as his smile reached his eyes. Something he was learning as he and Luna got closer was that he actually had interest in more than just her body. She was interesting, and funny. He wiped at his eyes as he calmed down, still half chuckling from the reference she’d made two minutes ago. “You have a nice laugh.” She commented and he felt his smile soften. Thinking about it, it was probably the first time Luna even saw him smile as widely as he was, and also the first time she actual heard his laugh out loud. Usually he would chuckle to himself silently or else just half-grin when he found something amusing. He was good at keeping his positive emotional emotions to himself. It wasn’t as if he laughed that much anyway. He shrugged, reaching out to pull her closer to him by the ends of her sweater. He brought her so she was right up to him, standing in between his legs as he rested against the kitchen counter. He looked down at her, eyes searching her face, as the joy was still written all over his own. He could tell by her reaction that she liked seeing him happy. He knew it was a sight to behold; him happy. Matt often teased him in his height of joy and Panda always commented about how she missed his smile or loved to see him happy. He’d never really understood any of that until the first time he made Luna smile, like genuinely smile and it had caused his heart to race. Of course, at the time, he had ignored it but now as they grew closer as a couple rather than two people who said ‘I hate you’ countless times during hot, angry sex, he learned not to ignore those things as much anymore. “Hmm, do I?” He hummed in response, his lips brushing up against hers with a softness that he reserved only for her to see of him. “Maybe I’ll let you hear it more often.”

{ v ;; no reason. 

      Jason was almost in stitches laughing watching one of his favourite comedians from Scotland. He had put on the comedy show mostly so that he could observe Iola’s reaction to the Scottish humour and his favourite comedian but he had ended up in hysterics of laughter while she struggled with the accent and the references for most of it. It was a failed attempt at letting her get to know him by showing her one of the things he loved. He looked down to her when she complimented his laugh, the sound dying down in his throat as it was taken over by a content smile. It felt like one of those moments where his laugh had just been funnier than any of the jokes he’d been roaring laughing at. “Thanks, babe.” He grinned but his smile died slightly when he realised the nickname he assigned to her. He glanced down at her to see if there was any kind of reaction, but she just seemed to still be smiling from how entertained she’d been by his laugh. He smiled to himself. “And you have a nice face.” He retorted back, leaning in to kiss her lightly as he giggled with his own words. He still got nervous when he kissed her or when she gave him such compliments. They hadn’t even known each other that long but he had never had any kind of relationship with another person that was filled with so much acceptance and dare he say love. It was almost instantaneous, the positivity and light that radiated between them; as if falling in love with one another what was meant to happen and despite all his consistent nerves and worries, being together, loving each other and all the compliments and kisses just felt right. 

{ v ;; july 17th. 

       Hearing Ari comment on his laugh, just made Zayn laugh even further. He’d gone into hysterics from one small joke that she had made and now he really couldn’t control himself. It was even starting to hurt his stomach a little; how aggressively he was laughing. He let out a loud and long breath, wiping at the tears in his eyes. “Fuck you.” He spoke but there was still a huge smile on his face and the amusement reigned in his eyes. He knew she was just taking the piss out of his laugh as he’d gone as far as making wheezing noises. Zayn couldn’t help it. Arianna was quite possible one of the funniest people he had ever had the pleasure to be around. His favourite thing to do every evening in the gyhab house was when he and Ari met up just to hang out. When they were both in a good mood, it was the most fun part of his week, or day, dependent on how often he was lucky enough to be around her. Zayn couldn’t even remember what Ari had said to send him into such fits of laughter but it was he reaction to him laughing so hard that just egged him on. “Whew!” He let out with a few final chuckles, wiping at the tears that sat upon his cheeks. He smiled down at, content. It had felt amazing to laugh like that, he didn’t do it often anymore. Having fun without worrying who was watching or if he was keeping up with the energy of someone else or trying to impress a crowd had become a rarity for Zayn. That’s what he loved so much about his friendship with Ari. Even past all of the darkness, the secrets and the hurt that they shared between one another, it was still the light that carried them through. He wrapped an arm around her. “You’re funny.” He pointed out. “I like hanging out with you.” And there was something in the air that Zayn couldn’t pinpoint but he wanted to just kiss her. He wondered what that meant. Zayn had kissed a lot of people but never felt the way he did in Ari’s presence. “You know in those movies where two people are laughing so hard and their laughs, like, fade and out of nowhere they’re kissing.” Zayn started. “What if we just— made out right now?”

{ v ;; what if. 

        Arianna’s words just made Ashton chuckle even more. His laughter subsided and what overtook his lips was a soft smile. “A nice laugh?” He retorted. He was grateful Arianna was here, he wasn’t sure she would want to be. He had done this for her so often before in the past but when it came down to it was still he who loved her the most and she had more to lose by abandoning her husband to take care of Ashton who was now the one having relationship woes with where he desired her care. Under the covers, tangled in the bed, Ashton suddenly felt a lot better than he had when he had called her to come over. “I think you’re just saying that to make sure I keep smiling and to forget that I was sad when you first called over.” He mocked, half knowing it was the truth behind her words. Ashton wasn’t sure if Arianna was here because she pitied him or because she genuinely cared for and loved him but he wasn’t about to question it, not while he had her in his arms, in his bed. He felt the guilt in his chest because he had chosen to just sneak around after a fight with Lexi but with Ari here, he couldn’t even allow it to overtake his bemusement. Part of him was beginning to understand how Ari had felt all those other times. At least now they could feel it together. He held up a hand to shush her when she went to argue agains this words. “And if you are, I really appreciate it.” He leaned forward, his lips close to hers so that she could feel his breath. “You’re a really good” he paused, lips brushing against hers but not exactly kissing her. “Friend.”

“You could stay here. With me.”

{ v ;; the princess and the moon. 

      Prince was laying on his side, leaning on one arm while his spare hand traced shapes into Luna’s bare skin. He had started just by tracing circles into her back in a kind of calm motion but he had absentmindedly traced ‘I love you’ with a heart in place of the word love against the skin. He had been a little taken aback by it but when Luna didn’t say anything, he was grateful even though he was almost sure she’d picked up on it. It was the first time that he and Luna were actually staying together in the bed after fucking. Usually, he was straight out the door or else he or Luna would fall asleep or someone was too drunk to drive— something along the lines of that would happen to force them to spend the night together. Or, sometimes, they would just pretend to be too tired to leave. Nothing was forcing them not to get up now, they were both wide awake, just holding onto each other. “You could stay here. With me.” She spoke and Prince was surprised. That wasn’t how they spoke to each other. He half-knew he should have expected this considering how often she’d accused him of being in love with her and how he slowly stopped fighting against it so violently. “Why would I want to do that?” He spoke gently, and quiet in a hushed tone but his response didn’t come out as vicious or as mean as the words usually would. They both knew it was a rhetorical question, they both knew why he would want to. His watched as she turned over into the bed, his hand not straying from her body but simply moving with it so it was resting on her stomach instead of her back when she turned around, wanting to constantly have some kind of touch on her. His eyes searched her face. She was so beautiful, of that he was sure. It was one of the few positive affirmations he assured her of when they were intimate. He was obsessed with her beauty. He loved running his hands through her hair, all over her body, cupping her face, kissing her lips, gazing into her eyes at any chance he could get. He didn’t understand the feeling he got when all of this occurred but he knew it meant something, even if he refused to admit it. “Okay.” He whispered, leaning in to kiss her in a soft way that he was sure was foreign to her. “I’ll stay here— with you.” 

{ v ;; no reason. 

        Jason pouted at his girlfriends words. If there was anything in the world that Jason McLoughlin wanted right now, it was to drop his suitcase and run to the nearest taxi and take Iola home. He would give up any Christmas festivities to stay under the bed with her, laughing and talking and making love, if he could. If Jason’s mother wasn’t in Scotland he wasn’t sure he would even ever return there but he knew he had to, for now. Maybe someday he would take Iola with him— but not yet. “Babyyyyyy.” He whined, pressing his lips to hers. Her hands were wrapped around his waist and he felt so utterly weak. Maybe if paying for flights home didn’t cost him so much he would feel nothing about tearing up his plane ticket and taking her up on her offer of staying in Chicago with her but he knew he couldn’t do that. He’d feel way too strange about it. “I want to stay here with you, you know I do. It’s just—” He shrugged, not really knowing what to say. “Family.” He chose to stick with. Iola knew his family life was complicated and she wouldn’t make getting on the flight difficult for him on purpose. The thing is, by allowing Iola to drop him to the airport he had allowed her to make it difficult. His girlfriend was the most beautiful girl in the world and that he was sure of. He had never seen anybody so gorgeous but still full of life and just having her here, kissing him and holding him, telling him she wished he could stay with her, she was making it near impossible for him to go and she didn’t even know it. He ran a hand through her hair, smiling lightly. “Hey, how about this, love,” he kissed her affectionately before carrying on. “I come home in January and on that day we have the date of all dates. I can start cooking a meal then feel lazy after chopping one vegetable and we can go find some takeaway and disturb all the other diners by how fucking cute we are because you can’t ever take your hands off me” He laughed at her reaction to his teasing, kissing her playfully. “And back home to argue about what movie we’re going to watch when realistically the second we pick one and put in on we’re just going to fuck and fall asleep. Does that sound like a plan?” He beamed. He leaned in to kiss her again and just in that moment, the intercom announced the final call for the flight to Scotland. 

{ v ;; july 17th. 

      Zayn let out a sigh and crawled into the bed with his wife, still fully clothed. He wrapped his arms around her waist as he rested his head on her stomach. The ache in his chest hadn’t gone away since returning home, the anxiety of knowing what was to come had become so overwhelming in the past few weeks. He knew if anyone would understand, it was her. “I want to stay, Ari. Like, so badly.” He confessed, quietly, a little sadly too. He wasn’t sure why he felt so upset when it came to leaving the band, he had wanted it from pretty much the start. Perhaps it was the fear of the backlash, or that he may not be liked or understood on his own. “I think—” He paused, biting his lips. “I think I will.” He spoke, as the realization in his mind only occurred as he spoke the words. He didn’t look at her, staying rest on top of her with her hands running through his hair in a calming motion. “I’m sorry for never telling you about all of this, I guess I just kept thinking ‘tomorrow will be better’ everyday. I thought eventually I would just perk up someday and realise I have everything but–” He shrugged, shaking his head. “It just never happened.” He shifted so he was looking up at her now, his neck aching slightly at the uncomfortable position he was laying himself in. Zayn had spent his years in the band miserable but always hoping for some kind of improvement mostly because he was fully aware of the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity being 1/5th of the biggest boyband in the world was and he felt ungrateful to not be enjoying it. He couldn’t help how he felt, though. He sighed and rested his head against her again. “I just– part of me can’t help feeling like I’ve wasted all my good years being miserable and just numb, really.” He paused, taking in his own words. It was true. His entire time in the band, he had just been numb, never having once gone out on stage sober. “Like were they the good years? What if I leave the band and nobody likes the music I make afterwards, or everybody just hates me?” He sighed, shaking his head to shake himself of his negative words and thoughts. He thought about Ari’s offer to stay at home with her instead of returning to tour and he knew there was nowhere he’d rather be. If being on tour was the last place he wanted to be, Ari’s side was the first. “I’ll stay.”

{ v ;; katie & leo. 

        Katie sighed, sitting back in the bed. It was tempting, truly it was. She wasn’t sure why she had even thought of returning to France. She did love it there when she was younger and it had made her feel closer to her mother because of how she adored it but there was nothing actually wrong with her life here in London to make her want to go. She hummed, looking over to her best friend’s face. She realised then that she didn’t want to leave him. Her dad had told her how her mother had been a bit of a loose canon, running away to France without telling anyone but her best friend. Looking at Leo, she almost felt herself questioning her mothers relationships. She couldn’t imagine saying no to him asking her not to go. In fact, she couldn’t understand why she ever thought it was a possibility. “Of course I will, Leo.” Katie spoke gently. She took his hand in hers and kissed the back of it. She laughed lightly, cringing at herself a little and decided to lighten the tone by dragging him down onto the bed with her, the pair rolling around laughing until they ended up with Leo straddling her, pinning her down to the bed. She smiled genuinely, her hair tossed all around the pillow beneath her. She pulled a hand from under his grip and reached up to place it on the side of his face, her thumb brushing the skin there softly. “I would go anywhere you asked me to go. Or stay anywhere you ask me to stay.” she laughed lightly at her own correction. She leaned up in a way that would encourage him to meet her half way, their lips connecting gently. It was a sincere moment, her expressing her devotion to him and the kiss they shared. “But you will have to at least take me away there for a weekend or something.” She giggled as they pulled apart.

“I know you think you’re all alone out there, but you’re not.”

{ v ;; the princess and the moon. 

        Prince looked down at Luna, who had interlocked their hands together after kissing him in a gentle manner that he knew was purposed to make him feel better. It did, slightly. He leaned in as she pulled away so to kiss her again. He didn’t want to talk, or fight anymore. Prince was so tired of fighting. He’d been doing it all his life, before he even met Luna. From the day Prince was removed from the home in which he lived with his father, Prince had been fighting to survive what became of him after. He’d been fighting to make sure Pandora never felt as unhappy or as empty as he did. He got a job cleaning pub toilets before he started working on the streets as a dealer all so he and Pandora could get their own place because as much as he didn’t want to feel like a burden, he had always felt like one in the King’s home. He fought everyday to not let in the demons that haunted him. Prince did all of this, all this fighting and now he was just so tired because what had come of it? Nothing, in his opinion. He had nothing to show and despite being here in Luna’s arms, he felt so alone. “I know you think you’re all alone out there, but you’re not.” He sighed and shook his head, pulling away from her. His eyes searched hers before he spoke. “That’s not true, Luna.” He spoke, feeling the exhaustion in every word he uttered. He released his hands from hers. “I can’t forgive him. Even if I wanted to, I don’t think I could even try. And for as long as I feel like this, she won’t forgive me.” He shrugged his shoulders. Since finding out about Pandora and Matt, Prince had felt himself becoming more and more distant from everyone. He hadn’t exactly been Mr. Joy beforehand but it hadn’t felt this lonely. He’d been trying not to blame Luna or Nick for not telling him, mostly Luna, but he hadn’t been able to help it recently. He just didn’t quite understand the reason for shielding him from the truth when everyone knew that, no matter what, he would be upset. If they had waited a week or a century, he would still be upset. He knew everyone knew that. He also believed that Luna’s loyalties should have lay with him. “I just don’t get why you didn’t tell me.” He spoke almost cautiously, choosing his words carefully. “Like, the two of them together— I don’t get that. But then it’s, like, that’s not all I’m struggling with that I don’t understand. I don’t understand how you chose to stay silent.” Prince pursed his lips together and shook his head, an uncomfortable chuckle falling from his lips. He had been holding this in since Nick let it slip about the relationship between his sister and his best friend who he had once thought of as a brother. He couldn’t do that anymore. Prince understood Nick not telling him because Nick was closer to Matt than he was Prince. As much as he tried, he couldn’t not sherk some of his disappointment onto Luna. “Maybe I am all alone out here.” His arms went up around him as if to motion something bigger than just the two of them standing there in her living room. “Maybe I really don’t have anyone I can trust. And maybe— just maybe–” he paused and looked at her for a lingering moment. “Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be.” It wasn’t a break-up speech but it felt something like an ending.

{ v ;; no reason. 

        Jason sighed. Part of him appreciated Iola trying to take care of him but part of him also kind of wanted to wallow in his sadness. He let the appreciation be the dominant emotion and chose not to ignore her. He turned in the bed so was facing her now. “I appreciate what you’re saying, my love, but I really don’t agree.” He spoke, gently. Jason threaded on eggshells when speaking of his own insecurities and struggles because he was never sure if Iola was going to get annoyed at him for not seeing himself the way she did or if she going to become overly passionate to make him feel better. In her defence, he always felt better with her around him but he always created these situations in his head as if she was going to someday change and turn against him for being so pathetic. That was one insecurity he never expressed to her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, light and sweet. “I know I’m not alone in here. I have you, baby, for as long as you’ll have me I know I’ll have you. But out there? What am I? Who am I?” He scoffed at himself. “I’m a nobody out there, I feel like maybe I am alone out in the real world. Like my sister saves fucking lives for a living, my brother serves justice to people that need it. What do I do? Paint pictures and cry regularly?” He shook his head as if he was mortified for himself. He knew Iola didn’t agree with him when he put himself down against his siblings but when they were so successful and so admired by his hard-to-please father, it just couldn’t be helped. When Iola went to disagree with him, he couldn’t take it so he leaned in to press his lips against hers, kissing her to quieten her but also feeling like he needed her closeness. “Maybe not being alone here in this little world of our own is all I need.” He murmured, pulling away.

{ v ;; july 17th. 

      Deciding to leave the band had been such a huge decision but Zayn had known, deep down, that it was the right one. For so long, he had pushed the thought away. It was part of the reason he had gotten so hooked on the drugs, believing at least if he was numb to the pain he could pretend to get through each performance or appearance with the boys. Leaving the band had taken an enormous amount of courage that no drug could instill in him. The only thing that could inspire him to make such a brave move was the love and support of his wife. He let out a deep breath and caught it again, his eyes catching hers and his hand latching onto both of her hands, squeezing tight. A stage manager knocked on the dressing room door, announcing there was only five minutes to go. He shook his head. “I can’t do it, Ari.” He whispered. He wasn’t sure what was wrong with him. He’d assumed it was going to be as difficult to get on stage as it had been when he was in the group but this somehow felt a million times more daunting. He pushed back the thoughts that told him it was because he was going out sober and reminded himself in his mind that it was because he was alone. “They’re not going to like me, not without the other lads. This was a mistake, it was wasn’t it— a mistake?” He rambled until he felt her hands on either side of his face, forcing him to look at her and nothing else. His eyes flickered shut momentarily when she kissed him, knowing she was doing it to shut him up but also to calm him down in the same breath. “I know you think you’re all alone out there but you’re not.” She told him and he took a deep breath before nodding, taking her words in. He knew she was right. At every point during tonights show, he knew he was going to be able to look to the side-stage and see her there, supporting him just as strongly as she had done from the beginning. He kissed her. “Thanks, babe. I love you.” And if anything was true, it was that. His love for her had only seemed to have grown upon becoming a solo artist, being able to write songs drawn from the inspiration of their relationship and his feelings for her had made it easier to express his romantic care for his wife. He also had more time to spend with her, and less stress to take out on her. If anything, ditching the band had been plus for their relationship at least.

{ v ;; katie & leo. 

        Katie rolled her eyes and stopped whacking the car with the baseball bat. She really did appreciate Leo-Valentin. Even if he could be Mr. Asshole a lot of the time, he never hid his feelings or his sincere care for Katie. He always made it known she was his best friend and he was there for her in every sense. “Look, I know you’re trying to be sweet and caring and ‘there for me’ right now but if you’re not going to pick up that crowbar you dropped and start beating this dickheads car with me then don’t talk to me.” And it was no question of what Leo was going to pick. It was as if he was proving his words to her. She wasn’t alone. She knew she wasn’t as long as she had him and all their other friends. There were things that she could only share with him and even at that she felt timid about sharing dark secrets. She watched as he collected the crow-bar he had dropped to the ground, smashing a headlight with it. She grinned and followed his head, smashing the other headlight at the front of the car. Then, she stopped. “There’s no such thing as ‘alone’ in my world, okay? Not when I have Leo-Valentin as my best friend and future boyfriend to be.” The sixteen year old smiled over at him. She appreciated that he could see through her current violent exterior to know she wasn’t okay but after her straying from talking, he could still respect that and just agree to smash up a car with her to help her take her anger out in a way she felt better than talking.