#amanda finally got her smooch in!!!

[sage-lights]

shayne transferring so much lipstick to spencer’s lips + olivia complaining that amanda kissed with so much teeth made me die laughing holy shit

[bepractical]

Kin: Season 1, Episode 7, Part 2

I’m finally back with part 2 of the episode 7 recap for the first season of Kin. In part 1: Eric got bad news from his lawyer while Amanda recruited her own; Eamon sicced Con and Mini Michael on every Kinsella ally in a bid to root out his drugs; Michael got a dressing down from Anna’s social worker; Birdy urged Frank to get himself together and (unintentionally) scared the pants off Nikki; and Michael was so supportive of Amanda she instigated a smooch, which Jimmy immediately interrupted with news about their bad dad. 

See the masterlist here.

Blah blah blah, these recaps have spoilers THE SEASON IS ALMOST OVER. THE END IS NIGH.

Who's ready for a hug?

We pick up where we left off, with Michael fleeing after Jimmy asks permission to visit their dad. In part 1 of this recap, I assumed Jimmy was being a good brother, because Jimmy is a giant mushball and very transparent. However, after Michael makes his awkward exit, Jimmy sits down immediately for a heart to heart with Amanda. It’s almost like he wanted to clear Michael out of there. Very curious. Then the scene ends with Michael looking like this:

Whether that’s regret he just made out of his brother’s wife, general upset at the mention of his abusive dad or something else, I do not know. 

Jimmy takes a seat and starts to pour himself a drink, while Amanda looks as ready to flee as Michael. Jimmy talks her into sticking around for one drink. 

Jimmy: I don’t take you for granted, you know. In case that’s what you think.

Ummmmm, you don’t get to decide that, Jimmy. Also, really? You absolutely do. Amanda looks dubious. But Jimmy’s trying to make a point here, that he loves and appreciates Amanda, even though he’s terrible at showing it. Amanda’s sincerely touched. I am suspicious of the timing of this declaration but I also love Jimmy-the-softy.

At the jail in protective custody, Eric gets heckled by the other prisoners about how quickly he’ll be killed once he’s sent to prison and released to the general population. I slightly question whether this is really happening or if he’s imagining these voices. It’s good either way.

At the compound the next morning, Amanda wakes Jimmy to ask how much money they have on hand. She’s off to bribe Noel-the-dead-car-guy’s wife, Jenny. That’s certainly a plan. She goes to the school where Jenny does janitorial work and offers her money for her testimony.

I’m not wild about this plan but I do like how Amanda sells it. Help or don’t help, get some cash for your kids or not. Amanda’s done apologizing for the things she’s done to protect her family. 

Back at the jail, Nikki shows up to see Eric. Seems she took that talk with Birdy to heart and has decided she’s not thrilled about spending her youth waiting on Eric to get out of jail. 

She goes to the meeting room where Eric is waiting and pleased as punch to see her, a stark contrast to her chilly demeanor. She gives him a quick update- the tanning salon was raided, Frank’s sad about Dotser, Amanda’s probably screwed, and Frank is going to talk to Bren on Eric’s behalf. Then she gets to the root of the matter: Eric’s fuck up could put him away for 10 years. He assures her he’ll be fine- no trouble thinking of himself- but Nikki wants him to think about her for once. What the hell is she supposed to do while he’s in jail for ten years? What would he do, if it was her going inside? He tries to appease her but they both know the answer to that. Nikki leaves and Eric makes one of those sweet, vulnerable faces that inspire me to give him more and more chances he probably doesn’t deserve.

At Anthony’s school, Con Doyle shows up and threatens him. He tells Anthony to tell Amanda that Eamon wants his drugs or he’ll burn Anthony alive. Not cool, Con.

Back at the dealership, Jenny is throwing her dead husband under the bus. For 500K she’s willing to tell Amanda’s new lawyer that Noel was the mastermind behind the money laundering and Amanda knew nothing of it. The lawyer calls BS immediately and points out how illegal lying about all this is, but Amanda promises her Jenny will be better prepared by the time the police get involved. They’re still meeting when Amanda’s phone rings; it’s Anthony freaking out about Con’s visit. Amanda tells him to find a teacher and stay with them until she can come to get him.

Elsewhere in Dublin, Frank and Jimmy arrive at the prison to chat with Bren. 

Meanwhile at the compound, Anna swings by to see Michael. This is likely her first visit to this house since her mother was murdered there, which is pretty intense. They stand around drinking juice together awkwardly before Michael tells Anna about the visit from the social worker and the court order. That means little to Anna. She wants to see her dad, she doesn’t care about all his family’s bullshit.

Michael just wants to keep her safe, but maybe then he shouldn’t have come back into her life in the first place. She storms off. Michael looks upset but resigned.

At the prison, Frank and Jimmy wait for Bren. Frank looks like a kid waiting outside the principal’s office.

It’s similar to how he looked when Eamon was driving him to get the blood money from Caolan Moore.

Bren’s bummed Birdy’s not there, that he got stuck with these two idiots instead. He immediately starts insulting Frank’s terrible leadership skills. Jimmy tries to explain the circumstances surrounding killing Caolan Moore but Bren is not interested. He regrets not leaving Birdy in charge. Frank tries to defend himself but that only pisses Bren off more. Bren makes it clear that if anyone had gone against his word when he was in charge he would have killed them, family or not. I believe it. Then he points out Frank’s real problem- he’s never gotten his hands dirty (“not like Michael”) and everyone knows it. 

Bren calls Frank a windy cunt who looks like a hairdresser. As my mom would say, oh, he’s mean. He gets in Frank’s face and Frank full-body flinches away. Jimmy looks like this the whole time. Oh, poor Jimmy. 

Bren won't help Eric. He’s not interested in messing up his parole for that idiot. Before he leaves, he tells Jimmy to bring Michael next time. Hmmmm.

Birdy waits in Eamon’s hotel’s parking garage. He sees her, grabs his driver’s gun and jumps out of the car and into Birdy’s space. They are both incredibly intense. Birdy is 100 times more intimidating than Frank’s ever been. She taunts Eamon while he points a gun at her face.

Looks like they’re past the point of negotiating. He tells her all the Kinsellas are fair game now and storms off. 

On her way home from Michael’s, Anna is grabbed by three men, including Mini Michael. RE: MM, I know he’s just doing his job (kidnapping, attempted assassination) but they’re gonna need to kill him eventually. The three guys try to force Anna into the trunk of a car. It’s frightening. Some dude stops his car and yells at them to leave her alone.

Good on him. Anna escapes and runs back toward Michael’s. 

At the compound, Michael notices Birdy’s arrived home. He checks to see how things went and sees the bruise on her face from Eamon’s gun. So, not well. He’s pretty pissed.

They’re still talking things over when Anna comes running. She tells them about the attempted abduction and Michael pulls her into a hug, the first instigated by him the entire series, I think. My heart grows ten sizes, though it would have been nice to see without a kidnapping attempt preceding it.

He promises to sort things out and we know what that means. Someone’s gotta die.

Amanda races to Anthony’s school, like a gangster just threatened to burn him alive. Poor Anthony. He tells Amanda about Con’s threat and Amanda grabs him like a life preserver. Their scene closes on her making this face and, yeah, somebody’s dying.

At the prison, Jimmy and Frank are making their way to their car. Some guy looks at Frank and Frank freaks out and starts beating him with his motorcycle helmet. It’s pretty vicious. Bren did such a thorough job demeaning and belittling him, Frank has to get his feeling of control back somehow. Jimmy is horrified by this little display of frustrated compensatory impotence and pulls him away. FYI, Frank’s a dick.

This slow watch for the recaps has not been kind to Frank. He’s such a useless bully. I’m looking for a touch more nuance from him and his sexuality. This is a hypermasculine environment where even Michael, who’s considered a threat by everyone and genuinely doesn’t seem to give a shit, feels the need to hide his weaknesses. Frank’s sexuality is referenced often, all the references are derogatory. It’s connected to his personal deficits (many of which ride the line of gay stereotypes) AND Eric’s. I can’t decide how I feel about it. I don’t really feel bad for him anymore, though. 

Back at the Garda station, Eric gets cuffed up for his transfer to the prison. Don’t feel bad for him either.

At the compound, Michael waits outside for Amanda to get home with Anthony. Once Anthony’s shuffled off into the house, they compare stories of their children’s recent trauma. They’re obviously both ready to plan a murder. Their scene is cut with one of Eamon walking into his lap pool, which gave me major Caesar vibes for some reason (watch Rome, Ciarán Hinds is amazing). 

The episode ends with Amanda insisting it’s time to end things. How? “Chop the head off the snake.” Finally! Episode 8 starts here!

[wildflowerswildhorses]

svu

1. The first character I first fell in love with

Little baby Laura feel in love with Olivia Benson from the get go. I don't understand how Liv isn't the first person everyone falls in love with (unless you started with 2.0, then it should definitely be Amanda)

2. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now

Rafael Barba. To be honest when he came in I was still reeling from the lost of Cabot and Novak and I never thought I'd love any ADA as much as I loved them; but then Barba wormed his way into my heart.

3. The character everyone else loves that I don't.

Honestly, I'm not really sure? I don't think there's really any characters everyone loves that I hate.

4. The character I love that everyone else hates

Amanda fucking Rollins. I will love, support and defend this woman until the day I die from the sexist asses in the fandom who only hate her because she's a woman. How much she's grown (especially emotionally) in the ten years she's been on this show? Everything she's been through? Homegirl just deserves happiness and to be happy AND SHE'S FINALLY GOING TO GET THAT BECAUSE SHE FINALLY GOT HER MAN

5. The character I used to love but don't any longer

Maybe Stabler? Like I don't hate him or anything; but I think I definitely had blinders on when I was a kid and now that I'm older, I can definitely see the flaws that he had (and they will probably become more apparent if I go back and rewatch 1-12). Still like him though and I'm interested to see how much he's changed in the ten years he fucking dipped.

6. The character I would totally smooch.

Just one? Cause I would totally smack on Liv, Amanda, Carisi, Kat, Phoebe, etc.

7. The character I'd want to be like

Amanda or Liv. These two women have just been too so damn much and yet they still hold themselves so damn well and they're still good people at their core. Also from the time I was 3 or 4, I wanted to be like Olivia Benson. And whenever I'm in a weird funk, I just think about what Liv or Amanda would say to me to pull me out.

8. The character I'd slap

oh, 100% Elliot fucking Stabler for leaving Liv like that without having the balls (vagina) to tell her to her face. Sure I've shipped them since I was a kid and I always will; but I will never forgive him for that and I can't believe Liv already has

9. A pairing that I love

ROLLISI

10. A pairing that I despite

Barisi. Simply because the sexist, misogynistic shippers fucking ruined it for me.

[princeleyjeans]

Personal trikey plot headcanon:

Call me old fashioned or just a sucker for a slow, awkwardly dysfunctional descent into romance, but when it comes to my ideas of a semi realistic/workable ending for Mike and Trevor blows through like an icy wind on a warm summer afternoon, like you’ve walked around Costco and hit the fridge storage room, the customer one, you’re relieved to not be hot yet kinda upset at how opposite it is to the point you’ll hop around the doorway just to balance yourself out. That’s the premise of my headcanon.  2015 starts like any other at the De Santa household, brief morning arguments about Tracey’s life choices and her on/off flings with the college professors of all her classes, yes, ALL OF THEM, while she’s not flirting it up with Franklin since his wealth means he can chill at home with Chop and Lamar and the last thing he wants is to listen to L bitch all day about why he ain’t a 3 bit gangster yet so Frank hangs at their place to sit quietly by the pool next to his future daddy in law and not have to destroy his ears with music to drown out his besties moaning (All that time at the De Santa’s means he gets to know everybody and develop a crush on Tracey which eventually leads to babies and public screaming matches because she cannot live without drama or dick) .  The money following the union depository heist (If we assume the timeline of the final few missions rounded off around mid to late 2014) has come through after being washed via Lester’s numerous amount of fronts (Usually it wouldn’t take more than maybe a week, three tops, but the millions they pulled obviously required extra people, extra roads to travel, extra everything) and the family are in the green once again, however, the lack of worry over money gives everyone time to reflect, to make important changes in themselves and their lifestyles, well, some of them, not all.  As you can guess, the thrill of the chase being gone brings back Michael’s...issue, if you catch the drift and the deeper psychological reasons as to why create tension, release topics of conversation he never wanted to have ever again or prod using the longest of fucking sticks known to mankind.  If it isn’t sex, it’s the lack of general affection between him and Amanda being incredibly evident, painfully so, to the point they might as well be brother and sister because no married couple hug like they do, no happy person in a semi working relationship wakes up eager to pull the covers and see just the indent of their partner (Unless you’re one of the rare types who have S/O’s and just like bed space in the morning). Anyway, the talk finally bubbles to the surface, that now is the best time to divorce as the kids are grown up and they have money again and everything is sorta settled already, it’s just packing their bags and heading out, which is how the tears start cus neither of them wanna push the button, neither wanna make it official or make that call you dread while knowing it’s the least painful option for everyone, even those you ain’t met yet.  Michael gets himself a lil Vespucci condo (You know the ones with the cute bridge over the water), Amanda is given the house in the settlement and later sells it because she can’t deal with the memories and just moves into the hills (She buys one of the homes similar to Martin Madrazo’s but still close to the city), taking Tracey because no way is she living with Franklin just yet, and Jim sorta hovers, couch hopping because he’s having a rough time accepting his parents have broken up and work. He eventually bunks at Lamars and they become platonic love bros.  Come September, Mike starts giving into the questions plaguing his sexuality and ditches the gentlemen club for Leather-Face’s (Popular gay bar based around leather clothing and a really poor choice of name given to it by the owners brother who loved horror movies and ironically died when a Pomeranian bit his leg and it got infected, leading to septic shock and heart explosion), seeing if his lack of ability to be fully intimate towards women stems from an underlying homosexuality which turns out to be less than helpful as despite his new love of boppy music and sparkly fishnet tops, the touch of a man that isn’t Trevor proves to be just as lacking, just as lonely as that of a woman, given a few exceptions (He can get a lil hard to nude mags but it’s sorta a fluctuating mood spectrum) which tend to be just even more confusing and gets him in trouble with anybody interested in him.    Eventually, everything just comes to a semi climax when, with help from friends, Michael gives into his overall infatuations and comes out to Trevor, completely, asking for a date or “Hang out, but it can go ANYWHERE”, Trevs usual for just about anyone he meets ‘Insert cheap laugh here’. and gets understandably told to go fuck himself because why now and after all the pain he’s caused and blah blah Trevor’s hurt, this is opening wounds, big pity party for Mr Philips.  It takes a good deal of arguing and crying to convince his buddy to trust him but after....a month? two perhaps, Trevor eases up and they have their first terrible attempt at romance in the form of a movie at the condo and some fancy ass wine too good for both their tastes, but it leads to a cute, disgusting, hella gay half smooch and some giggles, plus some deep convo that opens M up to a chance at second base but Trevor teases him with the whole “Going easy on you, since it’s your first time” and heads home, forcing M to scream into his pillow and call Amanda cus they besties now.  Overall the headcanon is a slow progression into Mike realizing he’s somewhere on the mostly Aromantic/asexual spectrum with the exception of those he’s in love/obsessed with (Remember when Amanda said he got big balls when Brad tried to get her, it was mostly infatuation, Alpha dogging it) and being in love with Trevor, getting the life he tried to have before but properly this time, accepting himself and being sorta better but not really but also kinda.  Yes I know “MICHAEL WOULD NEVER----” Really don’t care, Honey, my headcanon, don’t like it, the doors to your...’Looks around’---WHERE IS THE FUCKING DOOR! 

[dastardlydandelion]

questions i ask myself as i contemplate impending karate soap opera hell at work:

does daniel know it was johnny who (albeit accidentally) knocked robby out??

are we finally going to meet tory's mom?

tory and amanda are going to interact??? that's gonna be interesting, amanda is *big* mama bear.

was tory's mom a mama bear before she got sick??

is tory a mama bear for her lil bro??

are we going to see shannon keene again??

are we going to see aisha again??

is aisha going to show up at the avt as part of a different dojo??

are we going to see aisha's mom again?? sry not sry, i think abt moms a lot.

do we get terry silver doing coke? ngl, i am so here for it. give us coked up crazy terry, he's no fun if he's not ridiculously over the top.

...robby gonna do coke with terry?? nah, robby and tory are both still on probation.

this isn't a question but i am so excited for miggy to train with daniel, when do i get to see miggy train with daniel?? oh hey, ig it is a question.

can the writers pls give the female characters smth to do that doesn't revolve around romance/romantic rivalries??? i was the first fan to defend sam and tory's rivalry bc i took tory's retaliation at sam smooching miggy as the kiss being her breaking point rather than the *only* thing she was angry abt-- esp since sam represents all of what tory doesn't and cannot have-- and i felt it made sense for her character. but it looks like tory's going to end up with yet another one of sam's exes, so i'm feeling much less friendly now. not going to defend anybody if with errything else that's going on in this girl's life, the only part of her story that'll be explored is the part that revolves around romance. 🙄

is kreese going to choke out robby??

who's going to stop kreese from choking out robby??

is miggy going to be in fighting form for the avt?? he was paralyzed for awhile. and he held his own during the christmas brawl but like, this is a competition. if he does the avt, i wouldn't mind him winning again...

why do i care this much abt a karate soap opera??? smdh, the quarantine must've rot my brain.

[ddaddsprompts]

Honestly Omegaverse has quickly became one of my fav AUs after seeing what you had for it so I hope it’s not to much to ask but can I request, how would the kids react to the dads all being together in one big pack? Also if it’s ok can you also show Amanda’s reaction to her father being an Omega to all of these Alphas. Thank you!

I really, really love Omegaverse, so any prompt allowing me to write in that verse is a good one! There are some more in the inbox I’m already looking forward to writing. Until then:

🥃 Valis a grown woman, so the whole pack-thing basically doesn’t affect her at all,but you still feel like she has a right to know her father not only has anOmega now, but is also part of a large pack. Robert, after protesting for thesake of it, agrees, and so you texted Val and invited her over to Maple Bay totalk. She shows up a week later and Robert and you take her to the bar. You prepareda speech, but as always, Robert beats you to it. The moment he sits back downafter giving everyone their drinks, he throws an arm over your shoulders, pullsyou close and, as subtle as a bull in a china shop, scents your neck. Your facegoes scarlet and Robert, the bastard, delights in your reaction, nipping onyour earlobe with a grin. He stops after Val throws a peanut at his face. “Wasthat your way of telling me you finally got your shit together and bonded?”Instead of answering, Robert lifts his glass. Val clinks hers against it andtoasts in your direction. Embarrassed as you still are, you only manage a nod. “Congrats.It’s about time.” Robert glares at her, but Val doesn’t seem fazed. Robert finisheshis (non-alcoholic) drink. “But, because I’m such a good Samaritan, I’msharing.” Val’s eyebrow joins the conversation. “You’re… sharing?” Finally, youbreak out of your daze and elbow Robert in the side. He laughs, like that didn’teven hurt. “Fuck the capitalist, patriarchal notion of the nuclear family unit.We’re more old-school.” He says. “Whole neighbourhood’s bonded. We’re takingturns. But I’m his favourite.” He pulls you closer and kisses your cheek, aloud wet smooch. Val pauses, before downing her drink in one go. “What else didI expect,” she mutters to herself. “’course you can’t do normal.”“Normal doesn’t exist. If we’re being technical, large packs are normal.”Robert waves at Neil, who nods and prepares more drinks. “You okay with that,kid?” Robert’s face, to those who don’t know him well, is as blank as always, buthis worry is visible to you. You kiss his neck, feel him relax a little. Valfinally breaks the silence. “Of course I am. If it means you’re happy, I don’tcare about the details.” Robert releases a long breath of relief and kissesyour temple. “To us.”

🍸 “Mary and the kids are going to be here soon,” Joseph says, briefly interrupting his phone call. You nod, before going back to nervously chewing on your nails. It doesn’t take long before a weight makes the couch next to you dip down, then Joseph pulls you into his side. As his scent rises to your nose, the tension melts from your body and you sigh. “There’s no reason to be nervous.” You make a doubtful noise at the back of your throat. Joseph tutts and kisses your head. He spends the time you’re waiting for Mary to drop off the kids trying to calm you down, but the sound of a car pulling up in front of the house undoes all his work. Christie is the first to burst through the door; her twin follows after a second and Chris walks in behind him, far slower than his siblings. The last Christiansen kid is asleep in his mother’s arms, but is dropped into yours by said mother. Mary winks at you. “Have fun, kids, don’t do what your Mom wouldn’t do, but also don’t do what she would definitely do.” She kisses them goodbye before leaving.Once Mary is gone, the kids settle on the ground to watch a movie. After some time, Crish starts squirming in your arms. He looks at you confused, then inhales deeply, before suddenly starting to bawl. “Sssh, what is it?” No matter what you do, the toddler wo ’t calm down. Joseph takes him from you and rubs Crish’s back. “I think it might be the strange scents on you.”“Oh.” Joseph notices your dejected tone and leans in to kiss you. “Don’t worry. It’s probably just the scents of the other Alphas and once he’s used to them, he won’t mind anymore. Give it some time.” The other three kids look up at you, confused. “Why do you smell like other Alphas?” Joseph and you exchange a look. “Erm. You know how when…” You’re struggling for words. Thankfully, someone comes to your help -  not Joseph, but Chris. “Omegas can bond with several Alphas. That’s called a pack.” The twins still look confused. “How does that work?”You blush. “That’s something for when you’re older, alright? Who wants some hot chocolate?” Joseph’s question gets him four yes. As he leaves, you look down at the kids. “Is that okay for you?” Chris shrugs and turns back to the movie, while his siblings hold a silent conversation before nodding. “Dad always says sharing is caring. Why not share love too.” You laugh softly and ruffle Christian’s hair. “That’s very wise of you.” The boy smiles proudly, then focuses on the screen again.

☕ “Carmen, baby, can Y/N and I talk to you for a second?” At the affirmative shout coming from Carmensita’s room, Mat drops his gaze back to you. “Don’t be so nervous Y/N. She likes you.” You sink further into the couch. “I’m not nervous.” Mat calmly raises an eyebrow at you. “I can smell you, babe. You’re reeking of stress. It’s taking me some self-restraint not to give into my instincts.” He walks over to the couch and puts his hands on your shoulders. Instantly, you melt. “Relax. Like that, yeah. Don’t worry. She reacted well to us bonding, didn’t she?” Begrudgingly, you have to admit he’s right. The sound of footsteps makes you look up. Carmensita regards you two curiously, before flopping down on the couch next to you. “What is it, Dad, Y/N?” Mat gives your shoulders one last squeeze, then joins you two on the couch. “You know what a pack is, right? In recent days, it’s mostly just the nuclear family, so the parents and their children, but centuries ago, it was common for several of these ‘basic units’ to form a pack.” Carmensita nods. “We learnt that in class.” She cocks her head and looks at you quizzically. “Is this where you tell me that you’re also bonded to Mister Cahn?” Both you and Mat stare at Carmensita in shock. Oblivious to your surprise, she continues. “Hazel, Briar and I discovered that a few days ago. That means we’re sisters, right?” You numbly nod. Carmensita smiles brightly. “That’s so cool. I have an older sister now!” Mat clears his throat. “That’s not all, baby. It’s not just Craig, but… also the other dads in the neighbourhood. The Bloodmarchs, the Christiansens, Robert, the Hardings and the Vegas. We’re all a big pack now.” “So technically, you have lots of siblings now. Is that… is that okay for you?” Carmensita stares at you, blinking as she processes the information. Then she breaks out into a huge grin and nods. “Now I’m an older sister, too!” She giggles. Relieved, you slump into Mat’s side. He wraps an arm around you, the other around Carmensita, and pulls you both close.

🌹 "Y/N.“You instantly recognise the voice and turn around. “Hey, Lucien, whatbrings you here?” During school time, no less. The teen buries his handsin his pockets and looks down on the ground. “Are you cheating on myDad?” Gasping in surprise, you stare at him. “What? No! What makesyou say that?!” Lucien pulls a face. “I saw you kiss MisterChristiansen two days ago.”“Didyou talk to Damien about it?” The teen shakes his head. “I don’t wanthim to hurt. If you’re cheating, get the fuck away from my Dad, before he findsout. He deserves better than being cheated on.” Without thinking you reachout and wrap your fingers around Lucien’s arm. The teen stares at you,unblinking. “Look, it’s not how it looks. I’m not cheating on your Dad,because he knows.” Lucien frowns. “He what?” You planned onhaving that conversation at home, with Damien by your side, but life never workedlike planned. It seems like you’ll have to do this yourself. “I… thewhole cul-de-sac, the Dads, I mean, we’re…” Frustrated, you let go ofLucien’s arm to gesture. “I’m not just bonded to Damien. I’m also bondedto Joseph, Robert, Mat, Hugo, Craig and Brian. We’re all pack now. Damien and Imeant to tell you but-” Lucien interrupts you by holding up a hand.“You mean to tell me all of the cul-de-sac Alphas and you are in one bigpack? And Dad said yes?” Unsure of what to say, you simply nod. Lucien pullsa hand out of his pockets and runs it through his hair. “I…” Heaverts his gaze and chews on his bottom lip. “Shit, I’m sorry Y/N. Ididn’t- I didn’t think you’d cheat but I saw you-” Gently, you put a handon his shoulder and smile. “It’s okay. I’m not mad. I’m glad to see youtake care of Damien’s well-being like that.” Lucien hesitantly nods. Yourelease him again. “Are you okaywith that? Being part of such a large pack?” Lucien shrugs. “It’s notlike I’ll have to play family with the other kids.” Atyour expression, he rolls his eyes, albeit with a small smile, and gives you a dismissivewave of his hand. “Never said I won’t give it a try.” With a scoff, he turns and walks away.

🎣 The conversation with Daisy,you feel, is going to be one of the easiest. She’s a smart girl, very grown-upfor her age, and you expect things to go well. Taking advantage of the factBrian’s off to work, leaving you and Daisy alone at his house, you preparedinner for the two of you and call Daisy down from her room. “It’s good,” shesays between two bites of spaghetti. You keep the fact that it’s practicallythe only dish you can do to yourself, instead wiping your mouth and clearingyour throat. “There’s something I want to talk about with you.” Daisy puts downher cutlery and looks at you intently. After a few seconds of silence, in whichyou prepare yourself mentally, you begin to explain. “You probably alreadynoticed something is different. You’re a smart girl and it’s not like we wentout of our way of hiding it. You know I’m an Omega—“ She nods. “—and that yourDad and the others are Alphas. You probably also noticed your Dad and megetting closer and all that.”“You weren’t exactly subtle about it,” Daisy says so matter-of-factly, you can’thelp but chuckle. “Exactly. But you might also have noticed that I’m also asclose to the other Dads as I am to him. There’s a reason for that and that’salso why I wanted to talk to you. Do you know what a pack is?” Daisy thinksabout it for a moment. “It’s a large group of individuals forming a sort offamily unit. Dad, Mum and I were a pack, I think, before the divorce.”“That’s right. The family is the smallest and most natural pack everyone hasuntil they are grown-up, at which point it loosens or dissolves as the childrenform new packs. You can also form a pack with friends. Or…” You take a deepbreath. “Several Alphas form a pack around an Omega. They’re all bonded to thatOmega.” It clicks immediately. Daisy’s eyes widen. With horror you realise she looks sad. “Are… are Dad and I not enough for you?”“Daisy, sweetheart, that’s not the reason.” You reach out for her hands across the table. “Sometimes, people love more than one person romantically. That doesn’t mean they love any of the people less than the others or that one wasn’t enough. I love you and Brian just as much as any of the others.” Daisy considers your words, sniffling, but eventually nods. Unable to stay seated, you round the table and wrap your arms around her. She buries her face in your shoulder. “So I have siblings now?” You quietly laugh. “Kind of. You have two big sisters and…”

👟 “—and basically, that meanswe’re all a huge family now, but you’re not obligated to hang out with theother kids or like the other Dads, because technically speaking, the only thingconnecting you to them is me and I know in some packs, the Alphas don’t hangout with each other, but I don’t think that-““Bro,” Craig interrupts you, voice somewhere between amusement and concern.Blushing, you turn around and smile sheepishly. Behind you, River gurgles. “Wereyou practising your speech in front of River?” Your lack of reply is all theconfirmation he needs. Though he’s still all sweaty and gross from jogging, youlet him pull you into a hug and bury your nose in his neck. You’re verythankful for evolution’s ingenuity making your Alphas’ scents so soothing toyou. “It’s going to be okay, bro, don’t worry so much. The kids already knowthe others. Besides, they’re old enough to understand the whole pack thing.Biology classes and all.” He pulls a face. “Those were some interesting questions,let me tell you.” Craig shakes his head, as if shaking those thoughts off, andsqueezes you. “So relax. You got River down, only two more to go.”“To go for what?” At the twins’ sudden appearance, you want to step away fromCraig, but the Alpha tightens his grip, foiling your plans of escaping tosafety. Your glare only makes him smirk. “My bro—“ Briar rolls her eyes.“—wants to tell you something but he’s beating himself up about it.” Hazelexchanges a glance with her sister. “Is it about all the Dads of the cul-de-sacbeing in a pack now?” Silence. You splutter, “Wh- How? Who?” Hazel shrugs nonchalantly.“Carmensita. We were hanging out and she mentioned how Y/N bonded with herDad, and we kind of realised that way. We’re cool with it.” “Means more presents at Christmas.” Before you can recover from that, they’re off again, leaving you andCraig alone. You turn to look at him and blink a few times. He’s obviouslytrying hard not to laugh. You shove against his chest, but he doesn’t evenbudge, just chuckles and pulls you close again. “See, you needn’t haveworried.”

📖 Of all the kids, it was Ernest you dreaded talking tothe most. You know judging someone in an emotional time like puberty, and afteronly meeting them once or twice, isn’t right, but you can’t help yourself. He’sthe big unknown in the whole equation – chances are, though, he won’t like theidea of suddenly being swept into a big pack. Hugo suggested sitting him downand laying it all out, so that’s what you’re doing. From the way Ernest issitting leaned back away from you as far as possible, arms crossed in front ofhis chest, you’d think he’s being interrogated by the police. Your anxiety musthave been visible – or smell-able – as Hugo scoots closer so that yourshoulders are pressed together. “Do you have any idea why we wanted to talk toyou, Ernest?” The teen just scoffs and continues glaring. Not the best start toa conversation like that. “I’m not sure how far your biology course got intothe dynamics of Alphas, Betas and Omegas and whether you paid attention, but—““If you’re about to give me the birds and bees speech, I’m out of here.” Ernest’salready halfway out of his seat before he even finishes his sentence. You reachout and touch his shoulder, and he immediately brushes off your hand but staysseated at least. A quick glance over at Hugo tells you he’s keeping in hisfrustration. Taking a deep breath, you decide to be upfront. “You know I’m anOmega, right?” Narrowing his eyes in confusion, Ernest nods. “Your Dad and allthe other Dads in the cul-de-sac are Alphas. We… bonded. Now, traditionally,that’d mean you’re part of the pack too, at least until you’re of age, but ifyou don’t want anything to do…” When you see the way Ernest’s eyes went wide likesaucers, you trail off. Your instincts, the ones evolution gave you, make youwant to pull him close and comfort him, but you hold back, waiting. Eventually,Ernest breaks out of his trance. His eyes are suspiciously wet. “Okay.” Withoutanother word, he gets up and leaves. You could have imagined it, but to you, hesounded happy.

🐼 “I come home from college and there’s Alpha scent allover the house?” You startle awake from your nap and nearly fall off the couch.It’s only your superior Dad reflexes that save you from a dire fate. Even so,Amanda looks more amused than impressed as she drops her bag at the door andcrosses her arms in front of her chest. “I mean, I kind of expected it, butstill.”“Are you saying you expected your Dad to be swept up by one of the Alphas inthe neighbourhood?” You raise your eyebrows at her. “If I didn’t know better, I’daccuse you of thinking in stereotypes, Panda.” She huffs out a laugh andfinally crosses the distance, throwing herself into your arms. After a fewmoments, she pauses and takes a deep breath. “That’s weird.” Panic begins torise in your chest. Amanda, while only being a Beta and thus not possessing anAlpha’s sense of smell, still picks up on the change in your body odour. Like ashark, she hones in on it. “What is?” Amanda leans back to look at you. “When Icame in, I smelled Alpha and it smelled familiar. Kind of like cigarettes, so Ithought you fell for Mister Small’s bad boy image. But now that I’m close toyou—“ She scents you again, making you blush a deep red. “—there’s also sawdustin there? And coffee. Hints of flowers, too, though more subtle.” BecauseDamien, unlike Robert or Brian, doesn’t feel the need to scent-mark you to thepoint it’s like a perfume. Amanda knows. She’s only drawing it out to make yousuffer. With her on your lap, there’s no way to escape. Your daughter focusesher eyes on you, staring at you with narrowed eyes, critically, making yousquirm. You know you should have talked about her before just making a bigdecision such as becoming the Omega of a pack of seven, but it all happened sofast, and telling her over skype never seemed right. Suddenly, Amanda grinned.She playfully slapped your shoulder and whistled between her teeth. “Neverwould have thought my Dad had such game!” You blink. “So you’re… okay with it?” Amanda laughs and hugs you. “Of course I am! Not just because I’ve always wanted to be the big sister, but also because it means you won’t be alone when I’m not here.” Shaking your head fondly, you wrap your arms around your daughter and hug her back.

- Mod Mare

[tabloidtoc]

People, November 2

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Widowed by COVID-19 -- three months after actor Nick Cordero’s death at 41 his grieving wife Amanda Kloots opens up about staying strong for their son Elvis

Page 1: Chatter -- Kate Hudson on smooching frequent costar Matthew McConaughey onscreen, Eva Mendes on raising two daughters with Ryan Gosling, Sam Smith on trying to find love online, Jennifer Hudson on the late Aretha Franklin whom she portrays in Respect, Blake Shelton on his early performances, Jennifer Lopez on bringing her daughter Emme out during her Super Bowl halftime performance 

Page 2: 5 Things We’re Talking About This Week -- A PAW Patrol movie enlists A-list actors, Dexter plots its return, Dunkin’ debuts the Spicy Ghost Pepper Donut, Yes Cameron Diaz and Nicole Richie are related, Jacob Tremblay plays a young Justin Bieber 

Page 4: Contents 

Page 7: Editor’s Letter 

Page 8: StarTracks -- stars rock the remote Billboard Music Awards -- Lizzo used her speech to speak out against suppression 

Page 9: Alicia Keys, Garth Brooks, Post Malone with host Kelly Clarkson, En Vogue’s Rhona Bennett and Terry Ellis and Cindy Herron celebrated their 30 anniversary as a band 

Page 10: Tom Cruise shared a laugh with his Mission: Impossible 7 costar Hayley Atwell in Rome, Chris Rock sparked romance buzz when he stepped out for lunch with actress Carmen Ejogo in Malibu, Bella Hadid was all smiles during a Michael Kors photo shoot in New York City, Nick Cannon wore a Protect Black Women shirt to the Feed Your City Challenge COVID-19 relief event in Chicago 

Page 11: Royals at Work -- Princess Kate stopped by Imperial College in London to learn about new research on pregnancy loss and premature births, Prince William joined Queen Elizabeth on her visit to the Science and Technology Laboratory in Porton Down for their first public outing in two years

Page 12: First Look at  the upcoming comedy Superintelligence with Melissa McCarthy and Bobby Cannavale, Katie Holmes and boyfriend Emilio Vitolo Jr. went for a spin around Manhattan, Sarah Jessica Parker posed in front of one of her SJP Collection stores for a photo shoot in New York City

Page 13: Jason Derulo attended the drive-in premiere of the musical drama Clouds with his girlfriend Jena Frumes in L.A., Macaulay Culkin and girlfriend Brenda Song went for a walk with their dog on a leash and their cat in a stroller in L.A., just four months after Courtney Robertson and Humberto Preciado welcomed their son Joaquin the couple wed in an intimate outdoor ceremony at the Tlaquepaque Arts & Crafts Village in Sedona, Arizona 

Page 17: Scoop -- John Cena tied the knot with Shay Shariatzadeh in Tampa 

Page 18: Armie Hammer fights Elizabeth Chambers over child custody 

Page 20: Heart Monitor -- Keanu Reeves and Alexandra Grant going strong, J.P. Rosenbaum and Ashley Hebert surprise split, Taraji P. Henson and Kelvin Hayden engagement called off, Zac Efron and Vanessa Valladares getting serious 

Page 21: John Legend and Chrissy Teigen healing after the loss of their third child, Anthony Hopkins has found a creative to help children affected by COVID-19 -- he’s launching a namesake fragrance brand which benefits the nonprofit No Kid Hungry 

Page 22: Maren Morris’ new life as a mom, Then & Now -- Thomas Brodie-Sangster -- the Love Actually kid turns 30 

Page 25: Marlon Wayans from funny man to leading man, how Gretchen Carlson is moving on 

Page 29: Passages, Why I Care -- Lily Collins works to raise funds for vulnerable children as a GO Campaign ambassador 

Page 31: Stories to Make You Smile -- an artist spreads joy with her natural art, this dog is a connoisseur with chopsticks 

Page 35: People Picks -- The Undoing 

Page 36: Roald Dahl’s The Witches, Bad Hair, Bruce Springsteen -- Letter to You, Q&A -- Emily is Paris’s Lucas Bravo 

Page 37: The Queen’s Gambit, Hubie Halloween, Time, One to Watch -- Fargo’s Kelsey Asbille 

Page 39: Books 

Page 40: Cover Story -- Nick Cordero’s widow Amanda Kloots -- I definitely feel Nick’s presence -- her actor husband died of COVID-19 in July and now she’s staying strong for their son and finding solace in support from around the world 

Page 46: Brooke Shields -- what I know now -- the actress opens up about embracing her wage and wearing a bikini at age 55 and how she finally found true confidence 

Page 50: Missing -- help us find these kids -- whether the search has gone on for months or decades loved ones and law enforcement refuse to give up hopes of bringing each one of these children home 

Page 54: Jill Duggar Dillard -- small changes, controversial choices -- for years she followed her family’s rules without question but now after distancing herself from them the reality star opens up about why she’s changed some of her ways 

Page 58: Reasons for Hope in America -- in these uncertain times a celebration of creative people and inspiring acts and natural beauty and much-needed good news 

Page 62: Sarah Cooper -- from Google staffer to comedy star -- a daughter of Jamaican immigrants she went to work at the tech giant then her videos satirizing President Trump went viral and now she’s living her dream 

Page 64: Photographer Camilla McGrath -- candid camera -- photos by an Italian aristocrat wed to a party-hearty American offer a rare peak into the private celebrity life of a bygone era -- Mick Jagger, Yoko Ono and Sean Lennon, Sharon Tate and Roman Polanski 

Page 65: Barbra Streisand and Sydney Pollack, Audrey Hepburn and Anita Loos, Keith Richards and son Marlon 

Page 66: Jacqueline Kennedy and sister Lee Canfield, Michael Douglas and son Cameron

Page 67: Jerry Brown and Linda Ronstadt, Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill and Griffin Dunne, Angelica Huston and Robert Graham 

Page 69: Cameron Dallas -- social media was a drug for me -- he was one of the first influencers to catapult to megafame but the fun soon turned debilitating and now the former teen idol reveals how he got sober and created a more meaningful life 

Page 72: Volunteer Pilots Make a Special Delivery -- puppies with a purpose -- after COVID-19 travel restrictions grounded dozens of young service dogs in training local pilots stepped up to help 

Page 75: Hollywood at Home -- Jane the Virgin star Justin Baldoni’s California oasis -- the actor-director and his wife Emily created a Feng Shui-ed farmhouse in the middle of the city 

Page 87: Second Look -- Chris Hemsworth and Elsa Pataky release tasmanian devils into a sanctuary north of Sydney, Australia 

Page 88: One Last Thing -- Kristin Chenoweth -- the actress stars in Netflix’s rom-com Holidate 

[romcomathon2016]

Easy A (USA, 2010)

Predictions: No predictions. We had both already seen this film. :)

Plot: Emma Stone is your average Natasha Bedingfield fan, a normal high-schooler in 2010. Until, one day, she lies to her overbearing best friend in the girls' restroom, pretending that she had sex with a college guy. Amanda Bynes, the local Christian busybody, overhears this and tells everyone. One thing leads to another, and, before you know it, Emma Stone is pretending to have sex for gift cards just, you know, left and right. It starts with her trying to help out one gay guy (Dan Byrd), but soon enough her life is just an endless stream of corsets, (fake!)chlamydia, and continuous vlog narration of a slightly heavy-handed Scarlet Letter analogy.

While Emma Stone's amazing and hilarious parents know that she is not really sleeping her way across campus, nonetheless she eventually becomes bothered by, you know, the chlamydia rumors and being legit propositioned by a creep in a parking lot. She decides to come clean, with the help of Penn Badgley, her crush/the boy she pretended to kiss in 8th grade (apparently fake hookups are a theme in Emma Stone's young life). She does a song and dance in front of the whole school, makes them watch the movie we have been watching, and rides off into the sunset with Penn Badgley on his neighbor's lawn mower. Everyone lives happily ever after, except the people who lied about having chlamydia.

Best Scene: Every scene with Emma Stone's parents, Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson. They are fantastic. So funny. So supportive. Can we have your parents, Emma Stone?

Worst Scene: Obviously the scene where her creep classmate tries to actually have sex with her for a $200 Home Depot gift card. Really? Home Depot? Target, at least. Come on, man. Also, it's frightening and horrible. DON'T HAVE SEX FOR MONEY, KIDS. Or pretend to. :|

Best Line: "Yes. Yes, I believe so, if I was a Gossip Girl in a Sweet Valley with Traveling Pants." -- Emma Stone, dryly, when her shitty friend asks her about being in love with her fake one-night stand. What an amazing YA-romance-reference-smush.

Worst Line: Um, obviously something that creep says about how he paid Emma Stone (a gift card to Home Depot, mind you) and is now entitled to her body. Grrrr.

Highlights of the Watching Experience: Why didn't Emma Stone just download "Pocketful of Sunshine," instead of incessantly playing it off that greeting card? This was 2010. She was perfectly capable of buying the song on iTunes. Support artists, Emma Stone. Also, "webcast," eh?? Is that what we called livestreaming or periscoping or vlogging or whatever, back in the day? The evolution of words in our modern time, guys. And finally, what's with this A that fills up with scarlet crayon blood at the beginning of this Blu-Ray? A touch unsettling.

How Many POC in the Film: Well, her little brother is black. She also pretends to hook up with some Asian nerds, among other nerds. Maybe some other classmates? In conclusion, mostly white people were in this film.

Alternate Scenes: Well, that whole "Lisa Kudrow, married guidance counselor, sleeps with a student and gives him chlamydia" story really bums us out. Perhaps we could have done without that. Alternately, perhaps we would have liked to add a scene, clarifying where Lisa Kudrow got the chlamydia that she subsequently gave to this student. I mean, how many people is this lady sleeping with?? Where is she finding the time????

Was the Poster Better or Worse than the Film: Worse. This detention-mugshot poster is fine, albeit weird, but the movie is delightful. REALLY HOLDS UP, YOU GUYS. Would recommend.

Score: 8 out of 10 Nathaniel Hawthorne smooches. Fake adultery ftw! Except for Lisa Kudrow, who is engaging in actual adultery, which is not cool. Not cool, Lisa Kudrow.

Ranking: 17, out of the 99 movies we’ve seen so far. Technically probably not a romcom, but it has both rom- and -com in our hearts.

[3000wordsandnolife]

Countdown To Midnight- Chapter 2

My bag was quickly taken away by a concierge, as another guided me in. Clearly the lie I had told had worked, and their desperation for tips was making them cater to my every whim. I told myself not to let this power go to my head, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t listen to myself.

“This way madam, I shall give you a tour of the establishment as the other gentleman takes your bag to your room.” The man’s accent was French, which didn’t surprise me in the slightest. I had a feeling that they had chosen French staff on purpose just to seem more impressive. “Err, actually, I’d rather take my own bag up. Just leave it in the lobby, could you?” I asked, in an annoying, higher-pitched voice. I had practiced this voice before, having had to blend in and pretend to be someone else before. Luckily, it still gave off the air of general ignorance that I aimed for. The less intelligent they thought I was, the easier it was for me. How simple life must be for the stupid.

“But, ma’am, why would you want that? That would just be more strenuous for you!” The man asked, his small, curly moustache bobbing with his mouth’s movements, causing me to have to use all my willpower not to stare at it. I paused, realising that I had no reason for having him not enter the room. Of course, I wouldn’t want him seeing the package, but I couldn’t just say that, could I? In the end, I decided to do the only thing I could think of.

“I don’t trust him. There are very valuable items in there, and the last thing I would want would be some butterfingered clod dropping my bag and breaking them. I’ll take them myself.” I said snobbishly. The man was sweating slightly. “Or maybe you’d rather I went and got my money back?” I added, which sealed the deal for the man.

“Very well madam, we’ll leave it behind the desk.” He said begrudgingly, his voice giving away his annoyance. I smiled inwardly. If there was one thing I knew, it was that money was an excellent motivator. The last thing he’d want would be his paycheck getting away from him. As the two of us walked into the next room, I heard the talkers before I saw them. Across the dining room were two men, having a rather loud, yet personal conversation.

“Come on Aaron, it’s nothing to worry about. So what if your ex is here, it’s not as if he’s going to be able to ruin this weekend for us. It’s our anniversary, and I don’t care what that fat slob’s doing. This is about us.” One of them reassured the other, who I deduced was named Aaron.

“But Den, you know how he is, he’s going to get drunk and then all reminisce-y and just make everyone feel awkward. There’s plenty of other weekends, and plenty of places we can go instead.” Aaron said to Den, who stubbornly crossed his arms.

“Nuh-uh. He broke it off with you, remember? His job came first, and so he decided to leave you broken and alone. Then I found you and fixed you up. This is our time, not his, and I’m not gonna let him ruin it.” Den replied, before smooching his partner in a display of affection, which of course I looked away from. I didn’t care how happy you were, doing it in public was just showing off. Then again, that could just be my cynical, lonely side. Looking around, I couldn’t help but notice that the room was slightly… empty. I tapped the shoulder of the man in front of me.

“Um, where is everyone?” I asked him.

“It’s a very slow week for us this week. Only sixteen guests until next Friday.” The man responded, before turning back to the other guests. Only sixteen people? That was a little odd. Surely a hotel as big as this place would be a lot more packed, right? I shrugged it off as nothing, which it probably was. Maybe this was just my lucky week. “If you would like to sit down at a table, lunch will be served in about five minutes.” The man said to the rest of the guests. I watched as they spread out, noticing the couple’s efforts to keep away from another man, who I could only assume was the ex that Aaron had been referring to. I turned away from them, trying not to focus on their dead-end relationship, and saw a bespectacled woman sat by herself. She was petite, and her brunette hair was neatly straightened and tucked behind her ears as she pored over the book she was reading. Having seen nowhere else to go, I walked over, and sat at the same table as she was on. Noticing my arrival, she closed her book and looked up. There was a moment of silence, where I felt as if she was trying to read about my life simply from the clothes I was wearing.

“Hello.” She said simply, breaking the silence abruptly. I was caught off guard, and it took me a second to come up with a response.

“Hi!” I finally managed to say, extending a hand. “I’m Rose. I hope you don’t mind me sitting here.” The woman ignored my outstretched hand.

“Claire.” She said, reopening her book. There was another awkward silence, during which I put my hand back down. “I can’t get a read on you.” Claire finally said after some time. “On the one hand, you’re telling the truth in certain aspects, but on the other hand, you’re definitely lying. If not with your words, then by the way you act.” I was stunned. This was the first time my disguise had ever been seen through. “But then again, it’s not as if it’s done maliciously. You have an air of deliberation around you, as if it’s just part of your job.” Claire looked up at me. “Don’t worry, I won’t ask about yours if you don’t ask about mine.” She smiled, as if having told a joke. Except this was a joke I needed explaining to me. She returned to her book, and I examined the front of it. It was a book about quantum mechanics written by someone I won’t even attempt to remember.

“So do you just read that to look smart, or what?” I asked, cracking a joke, which was rare for me, but for whatever reason, I wanted to find out more about Claire. She looked back up at me, her eyes peering over the rim of the book.

“I’m not actually as smart as being able to do things like this. Soon enough, however, I will be.” Claire responded. “I have a PhD.” She added, in a tone that made it seem as if it was bragging. “I didn’t ask.” I responded passively.

“Well, you kinda did. You know, if you’re trying to flirt with me, you’d better have better wine than this. I don’t know what sort this is, but it tastes like rotten grapes.” I felt myself blush slightly at her comment.

“Actually, I think most wines taste like grapes, because they’re made from grapes.” I said, saying the first dumb thing that came to my head in an attempt to avoid another pause.

“I more meant that it was just utter shite. But never mind that, here comes Melvin.” Before I could ask Claire who Melvin was, I was quickly introduced to exactly who Melvin was.

“Well hello pretty ladies!” The voice of Melvin was comparable to the sound that a fork makes when you scrape it along the bottom of your plate by accident. Not the first, accidental time, but the second, irritating time when you’re trying your best not to do it, and yet you screw up and manage to accidentally do it anyway. “Sorry, I didn’t introduce myself, did I?” He outstretched his arm and offered his hand, which I reluctantly took, after which it was vigorously shaken. “I’m Melvin, Melvin Gracewell, owner and head of science at Gracewell Industries.” I wasn’t surprised by his status. I imagined most of the people in here were well off in life.

“Rose Harvey. In-between jobs at the moment, but taking a week off courtesy of my parents, who are just such darlings.” I said in my fake voice. Glancing at Claire, I saw her raise an eyebrow, and I cursed as I realised I had been talking to her in my regular voice. Seriously, what was it with me and her? Looking back at Melvin, I saw he had produced a card as if from nowhere.

 “Take one of these, and call me in the morning.” He said with a wink, making me want to recoil in my chair. “If you’re decent at your work, Gracewell Industries will be able to find a place for you.” I took the business card, and made a show of putting it into my purse. I neglected to tell him that I was most likely going to forget about it immediately, and then not use it anyway.

“Mel, leave her be. Not everyone wants to be a scientist, you know.” Claire said, as if this was a conversation she had with Melvin regularly. Melvin realised what he was doing and backed away slightly, rubbing the back of his head with an apologetic expression.

“Heh heh, sorry about that, I sometimes get a bit carried away with my work. It’s my whole world, you know. I was brought up into a family full of scientists, and so I had to continue the Gracewell legacy. I think I did well, if I do say so myself.” Melvin’s words were going in through one ear and out through the other. I was barely registering that he was even speaking, scanning the room to look at the other guests. There was a couple that was most likely going to have troubles, from what I could see. The wife was excitedly moving around, while the husband was sat stoic and stiff, clenching the tablecloth. I imagine it was taking all of his effort to not shout at her in public, and I had a moment where I remembered my own parents doing such a thing. I quickly shut it out. They were dead now, so who cared how badly they treated me. There was another person sat by herself, and this one I recognised. It was Amanda Valentine, a well-known model and advocate for women’s rights, and a tiny bit of a role model as I grew up. She had gotten old, however, and it was showing. She must have been in her fifties by now, but somehow she still managed to have an air of decadence about her. Counting everyone in the room, it came to sixteen, so I guess the staff member had been correct. “Oh, it looks like the food’s coming!” Melvin’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I glanced at the door to the kitchen. Sure enough, waiters were coming out, laden down with dishes with those silver plate-coverers that you only usually see in TV. One of them came to our table, and placed three platters down, taking the lid off of them one by one. It was some sort of soup, and the rich, creamy aroma filled the air quickly. I had to say, it seemed pretty good.

“Tomato and pumpkin bisque? Good lord, I haven’t had this in years!” Melvin exclaimed. I was beginning to get the feeling he just didn’t know how to stop speaking. I had no idea how Claire coped, but if I was going to enjoy my week here, I had to remember to try and stay away from him as best as I could. I took the spoon from the table, and gingerly lifted a spoonful of the food to my mouth, gently blowing away the steam rising from it, and quickly swallowed. It burned slightly going down, and was incredibly rich, a lot more so than most of the food I’d been eating for a while. One spoonful immediately made me feel full. Nonetheless, I kept eating, not willing to give up anything that tasted this good. A waiter came and poured some wine into my glass, and I drank it quickly, making sure that I seemed like the type of person who did this thing regularly. Not that it mattered, since Melvin was in his own world and Claire had already seen through my disguise, but didn’t seem to care. When everyone had finished and the waiters had took our empty dishes away, I sat back, once again going over the room. The couple that were most likely not going to last were talking, the man seeming disinterested in everything she was saying. Aaron and Den were laughing away, quite the contrary to the previous ones, and I glanced over to the man who I had suspected was the ‘evil’ ex. He was quietly reading a newspaper and drinking tea. Huh. Maybe those two were overreacting after all. Though from their personality, it wouldn’t surprise me. Because of how close he was sat to our table, I heard every word of the conversation that went down between him and his tablemates.

“So Jim, how’s life in the force treating you?” One of them asked the ex, who I now knew to be named Jim.

“Pretty good Wendell, if I say so myself. I’m actually an officer now, instead of one of those sissy community support officers. Not that there’s anything wrong with those guys, but it’s like comparing store-brand to name-brand. One of them is actually made with proper chocolate, and that’s the officers.” Jim responded, flicking over to another page in the newspaper. His muddled metaphor confused me, but I guessed his point was mostly just to shit on the smaller group. “I tell you, I had this guy come in off his tits on drugs, and I just laughed and pointed him to one of the lower rankings. My life’s been made a whole lot easier.” So Jim was a police officer. Add another name to the list of people I want to avoid.

“So what do you do then?” The third person asked, echoing the question I had. “Up until now, dealing with petty thievery and drunken brawls. It had been too long since a good shootout. But now, I’m cruising around and getting involved in drug busts. I tell ya Frank, it’s the life.” Jim responded. “But seriously, is this your newspaper? It’s shit! You really can’t expect me to do an interview for this, can you?” He added, closing the paper and tossing it onto the table. Frank looked unsure of himself.

“Well, we’re the number 3 most read in-” Frank began, before being cut off.

“Do I look like number 3 material to you?” Jim said, getting close to Frank.

“If anything, he’s number 2 material.” Claire muttered to herself, just loud enough for Jim to hear. He looked over to the table, and stood up. God damn it. He strode over, towering over all of us.

“You got something to say, missy?” Jim said, his bristling moustache quivering over his lip. I quickly intervened, then even more quickly began to regret it.

“Hey, it was just another conversation we were having. I’m really terribly sorry about the misunderstanding!” I said, letting out a faux-laugh, attempting to convince him. “I missed the part where I asked you.” He said simply, before turning back to Claire.

“I said, you’re a piece of shit. Go on and take out some of that internalized anger on me, and get your arse kicked out of here faster than you can say well this was a mistake.” Claire refused to back down, her posh accent doing well to help her hold her own.

“Oh for Christ’s sake Jim, what the hell are you playing at?” The voice of Aaron chimed in from across the room, and Jim pretended to not hear it. Aaron quickly made his way over to Jim, and tapped him on the shoulder. “Come on now, you’re drunk, and we both know how you get. Just apologise to the lady, and I’m sure she’ll apologise back.” “No I won’t.” Claire said stubbornly. “Not helping, honey.” Aaron used the word honey as if it was one of the biggest insults he could come up with. “Honestly, it’s as if you’re trying to cause an-” Before Aaron could continue, he was interrupted. “Excusez-moi, is there an issue here?” The waiter asked, walking up to the table. Everyone’s eyes went to Jim, as he stood there in silence.

“No.” He said, simply and finally, before walking away. Frank and Wendell looked at each other hesitantly, before following him. I pitied those two. God knows what they were here for, if not Jim.

“Geez-Louise that was certainly a kerfuffle. Sorry about that.” Aaron said, before extending a hand to Claire, who quickly rejected it, and then to me. “Aaron Hemsin.” He introduced himself. “Rose Harvey.” I replied back, before the name began to ring a bell. “Wait, that name sounds familiar.” I added.

“It should do, I’m an actor!” Aaron responded happily. Den walked over, and Aaron wrapped an arm around him. “And this is my life partner, Den Erics. We met on stage, and we just couldn’t be separated since.” “Hi.” Den said, before turning back to Aaron. “Listen, I’m gonna head up to our room. I’ll see you there, okay?” Aaron nodded at Den, who pecked him on the cheek and walked out.

“You know, I think I’d better head to my room as well. Make sure it’s all up to standard and stuff.” I said, trying to leave.

“Well, if you have to, then I guess we’ll see you around!” Melvin said, breaking his uncharacteristic silence. Judging from his personality, he probably had problems with bullies as a kid, so it didn’t surprise me that he had clammed up when he needed to speak. I made my excuses, got up, and walked out of the dining room. There were still a few people I didn’t know, but that wasn’t my goal, so I didn’t care. Getting into the elevator, tugging my retrieved suitcase behind me, I pushed the button for the fourth floor, and stood in silence as I went up. I was just glad it was only a week I had chosen to spend here. These lot weren’t exactly the type of people you’d choose to hang around with for an extended period of time. Claire was okay, though. I still wasn’t sure what it was about her, but she seemed like someone I could be honest with, strangely enough. Must have just been something about her. The elevator dinged, and I stepped out, walking to the 13th room. Room 413. I used my keycard, and the door swung open, the lights flicking on automatically, which was a nice touch. The room was quite pretty, though it lacked the usual things seen in a hotel like a balcony, or even large windows. The ones here were like normal house windows, barely enough to be able to fit through, never mind be able to see a whole cityscape through. Though the biggest thing that stood out was what was on my bed. Sitting there quite plainly, as if it were a mint left on the pillow by housekeeping, was a brown, rectangular box, quite inconspicuous in design. I wasn’t going to open it, but I knew it was what I had come for, so I opened my bag, took out a bottle of alcohol to make space, and slid it in. I then drank some of the alcohol straight from the bottle, regretting it a millisecond later. With my lunch threatening to resurface if I treated my body any worse, I laid down in the bed. It was quite comfy, and almost against my will, I felt myself slipping into a slumber. Before I could forget, however, I sat up and zipped the bag shut. No reason to see any suspicious packages, even if they came into my room. Lying back in the bed with a sense of accomplishment, I did what I hadn’t done since I was a child, and let myself nap.

[mcspirkholidayfest]

2016 FEST HAS ENDED...

But fear not, McSpirk fans, for your moderators are already making plans to bring you a 2017 Fest. Stay tuned to our blog for news of upcoming rounds, reminders of - and any changes on - how to participate, and a few announcements concerning exciting new features!

In the meantime, please take a moment to give a round of applause (and a kind word!) to all our Creators of 2016, to whom we owe many thanks for gifting us with McSpirk fanfiction, fanart, and fanmixes throughout the year.  In case you missed some of the amazing works from the final round, Christmas and New Year’s, or the handful of back-filled Previous Round prompts, see below the cut to catch up.

Fanmix

Prompt:  There’s a good chance that the Enterprise won’t make it back to any Federation planet, outpost, or starbase for the holidays. Worse yet, subspace communications are down so no one can contact their loved ones off ship. Cue the Captain trying to raise the spirits of his crew with his handy boyfriends at his side to help.

Fill: cheery christmas by @movingplant

Art

Prompt:  Kid!AU. Amanda, Sarek, and a young Spock are on Earth during the Christmas season because Sarek has some Ambassador duties to attend to. Amanda would like to expose Spock to some of her human holiday traditions including being charitable. She brings Spock to the Christmas party thrown by the local hospital for the young children that will be stuck there for the holidays. Amanda used to do volunteer work there and has stayed in touch with some of the staff which included one David McCoy. David McCoy brings his young son Leonard Horatio to the Christmas party because some of his patients are among these kids. David and Amanda introduce the boys to each other and leave them to hang out together. And yes one of the sick kids is a young Jimmy Kirk.

Fill: Fanart by @sofluffygonnadieeee

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Prompt:  Jim is trying to decorate the USS Enterprise “Christmas Vacation” style (i.e. National Lampoon movie). He puts holiday lights and other Christmas decoration articles everywhere. The crew soon begins to join him, except for Spock and Bones. They find his actions illogical (Spock) or “completely bonkers” (Bones), but nonetheless endearing. Although as the situation gets out of hand, Bones and Spock have to find a way to stop the others.

Fills: Fanart by @sleepymccoy with Bonus Art here

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Prompt:  Startfleet’s annual New Year’s party or a New Year’s party of some kind. Kirk encourages Jaylah to try champagne. Spock gets mildly drunk on chocolate. Bones and Spock each kissing one of Kirk’s cheeks when the countdown ends.

Fill: Fanart by @kaztial-does-art

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Prompt:   It’s the attack of the ugly sweaters!  Jim buys one for each boyfriend, and Leonard and Spock can’t say no.  Bonus points if Jim bought them matching sets, including mittens, hats, and scarves.

Fill: Fanart by @boomdeyadah

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Prompt:  (AOS) Spock reminisces about Christmas celebrations with Amanda on Vulcan/Earth. Jim and Bones decide to help him celebrate this year just like with his mom. They contact Sarek to find out if any of Spock’s christmas stuff is still around (like his stocking) and to also invite Sarek to come celebrate with them.

Fill: Fanart by @cocoamocha

Fanfiction

Prompt:   Spock vs. McCoy and/or Kirk, who are armed with mistletoe and/or the idea that you have to kiss someone at midnight on New Years’ Eve.  AOS or TOS.  Put your own spin on it.  Is Spock eager?  Is he unwilling?  Does he want to pretend he’s unwilling, but he’s actually curious?  Can they even tell how he feels about it all?  Is he manipulating McCoy right into his arms while pretending to be uninterested in anybody but Kirk?  Does Kirk know how Spock feels about McCoy?  Does Spock retaliate against them both with Vulcan traditions of his own?  Are the traditions real, or did he invent them just to mess with his friends?   Maybe Jim’s a sneaky puppetmaster pulling both Spock’s and McCoy’s strings… with the goal of getting them both right where he wants them.  Basically just manipulative scheming holiday triumvirate action with some first-time smooches (and possibly more) at stake.  X-D

Fill: Fanfic by @regulationblues

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Prompt:   It’s almost Christmas, but things look less than rosy on the USS Enterprise. Some weird mission, a mysterious plague, victims - not many, but still victims - before the CMO can come up with a cure. Jim doesn’t take it well and takes it out on Bones, much like with Spock’s blindness - hard words are exchanged. Nothing new but this time, something really got under Leonard’s skin - some of his Captain and lover’s accusations really broke something. On the next mission, down to a snowy, quiet uncharted planet Bones goes with the team but something is amiss. Kirk coughs awkwardly, reaching out. Spock a silently disapproving shadow looming over his shoulder. “Bones, you… I didn’t think you would agree to come, after all that mess.” Bones smiles a weak smile, a defeated smile. “Of course I agreed, Jim,” he says softly, “I will still follow you to the end of the universe and back, ten thousand times. But as your doctor - and your doctor only. I don’t think my heart can take being with someone for whom I’ll never be enough again.” Then he steps in the transporter, beams away, Captain and First Officer losing each a beat at his back. Five hours later, McCoy goes missing on the planet…

Fill: Fanfic by @greensarek

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Prompt:  Jim tries to teach his boyfriends how to ice skate. One of them is a natural. The other…really isn’t.

Fill: Fanfic by @waywardconsultingtimelady

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Prompt:  Spock and Bones get stranded in the middle of a snowstorm. Spock has to try to keep Bones from succumbing to hypothermia while Jim slowly loses his mind trying to find them both

Fill: Fanfic by @captainsandraclassof2029

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Prompt:   Coffeeshop AU! Jim is a barista near a popular science academy. All year, he’s watched two professors come in, grade together, and talk quietly. They’re Jim’s favorite customers, always patient enough for a little chat before their coffees and generous with tips. For Christmas, he’s determined to play cupid for the pair. Little does he know they’re already a couple and equally infatuated with him.

Fill: Fanfic by @drmcbones

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Prompt:   After Bones is kidnapped by a figure from Kirk’s past, he and Spock must deal with how exactly they are going to get their boyfriend back in time for dinner. Modern Cop AU

Fill: Fanfic by @goldberryintherushes

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Prompt:  Leonard has a date for the crewmen’s Christmas party. He’s kind of happy about that because he wasn’t looking forward to going by himself again. Strange thing is, though, he’s getting mixed reactions as people find out - especially when they automatically assume his date is either the Captain, the First Officer, or both and he has to correct them. Even worse, Jim and Spock suddenly seem intent on making certain he is too busy with work to go to the party. Why, Leonard wonders, can’t he catch a break? Bonus points if the date is one of Leonard’s staff who is hardly surprised to be accosted by an unhappy captain and Vulcan when the news breaks.

Fill: Fanfic by @starfleetdicks

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Prompt: My mom’s friends celebrate both Christmas and New Years Eve on New Year’s Eve. Anyway everyone brings presents and the presents are put into a bag. Someone wears a Santa hat and holds the bag. Someone else spins a bottle, who the bottle lands on gets to take a present out of the bag. Also they can trade presents with someone else. The trio hosting the above ‘spin the bottle to pick a present’ thing for the crew. The New Years part doesn’t have to be included, if it is that’s nice but I’m more concerned about the present part. Extra points if it’s Kirk’s idea and Bones grumbles about wearing the hat. I’m fine with TOS or AOS or a crossover of the two.

Fill: Fanfic by @tildytwo

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Prompt:  Bones ends up cursed somehow on Christmas day, and is told that he has to receive true love’s kiss by New Year’s or he’ll die. He thinks this is impossible, because he’s already in love, but neither Jim nor Spock will ever love him back. Rather than freaking out and trying to fight his fate or force love where it doesn’t exist, Bones just decides to make the most of the last few days he has with Jim and Spock, without telling them anything. They stay up together to usher in the new year. Spock and Jim are happy, and Bones is happy just being with them one last time. And then Bones collapses…

Fill: Fanfic by @iwillstaywiththemforever

Special: Previous Round Fills

Prompt:   The triumvirate take Joanna trick or treating. Special appearances by Ben, Sulu, and Demora for hella bonus points but not required.

Fill: Fanart by @waywardconsultingtimelady

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Prompt:  Vampires/werewolves are real. And OF COURSE Jim Kirk is one.

Fill: Fanfic by @starfleetdicks​

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Prompt:  Okay, basically I need a fic with Spock and Jim taking care of a recovering Bones after the usual mission-gone-downhill-and-selfless-heroism routine - all drenched in Halloween-y feels. The boys being stuck in some gloomy planet full of weird stuff, the trio going on shoreleave in a Autumn-y lodge to make Len rest and finding trouble, ghosts hunting the Enterprise, it’s all good really, as long as there is a lot of overprotective Captain and First Officer, cuddles and loved Bones. Extra point for hurt/comfort details, of course.

Fill: Fanfic by @drmcbones​

[kartiavelino]

How Ayesha Curry, Khloe Kardashian and Extra Celebs Hearth Again at Mommy Shamers

Movie star mothers will not be right here in your essential feedback on their parenting abilities. From Jessie James Decker to Khloe Kardashian, stars are clapping again on the criticism they obtain on social media. This week, Ayesha Curry clapped again at a troll who left a hateful comment about her kid’s look. On Tuesday, Might 21, Ayesha shared a household picture on Instagram, during which she’s holding 10-month-old son Canon W. Jack Curry. Within the feedback of the image, one social media person wrote, “Are you pregnant once more?” “completely not LOL,” Ayesha replied. “My 30 lb son is simply breaking my again in each picture.” However then one other social media person determined to go away a essential remark about her son, which didn’t sit properly with Ayesha. “If that child is 30lbs he is received some critical well being points occurring,” the Instagram person wrote. After seeing this remark, the creator fired again, “excuse you? No. Simply no.” And Ayesha, Jessie and Khloe aren’t alone, let’s check out extra celebs who’ve clapped again at mommy shamers! Instagram / Khloe Kardashian Khloe Kardashian The Good American co-founder, who’s mother to True Thompson, is so over the hateful commentary on her parenting abilities. In an interview with  E! Information’ Zanna Roberts Rassi, Khloe Kardashian defined that she acquired criticism for going to a charity occasion with out her daughter. “I used to be at a charity occasion final weekend and I am actually making an attempt to lift cash for most cancers analysis and I am getting annihilated for being someplace on a Sunday,” Khloe instructed Rassi. “I am like, ‘She’s along with her dad, you a–hole. Like, what would you like me to do?'” Instagram Jana Kramer After sharing a video of her daughter having a mood tantrum on the dinner desk, Jana Kramer acquired essential feedback on social media. The singer and actress then took to her Instagram Story to fire back, saying, “You do not know, you do not reside on this home, you do not know what is going on on. Please do not inform me why my kid’s appearing that means. Thanks.” Instagram Ayesha Curry Ayesha Curry just isn’t right here in your essential feedback about her household. After posting a household picture to social media, one Instagram person commented, “Are you pregnant once more?” In response, Ayesha wrote again, “completely not LOL. My 30 lb son is simply breaking my again in each picture.” “If that child is 30lbs he is received some critical well being points occurring,” one other Instagram person wrote. After seeing this remark, Ayesha clapped back, “excuse you? No. Simply no.” Article continues beneath BACKGRID; Instagram Candice Swanepoel Mommy shamers went after this Victoria’s Secret mannequin when she was noticed absorbing the solar’s rays simply weeks after giving start to her second son Ariel. In a message shared to her Instagram tales, the South African stated, “That is me 12 days after having my son. In case you have one thing dangerous to say about it… Verify your self. Society may be so merciless to 1 one other. Magnificence requirements are typically inconceivable for girls lately. I’m not ashamed to point out my post-partum tummy, I’m proud truly. I carried my son for 9 months in there, I believe I’ve earned the appropriate to have a bit of tummy.” She completed her assertion by reminding her followers, “Girls, we’re all on this collectively, be variety to one another.” Instagram Kourtney Kardashian Whereas on an action-packed vacation in Italy, this scorching mama needed to take a break from her sunbathing to right an Instagram person who questioned the place the Disick kids have been. “My son was taking the picture, and the opposite two have been sitting a desk throughout from me. Thanks a lot in your concern,” the 39-year-old clapped back. Actually, the seaside getaway was in honor of her daughter Penelope‘s 6th birthday. The proud mama instructed her Instagram followers, “My little birthday ladybug makes my coronary heart extremely full every single day. So in awe of her.” Instagram Chrissy Teigen In yet one more mommy-shaming saga, the mother-of-two was criticized for not taking enough care of her son Miles, with one Instagram person commenting, “He does not look to (sic) proud of the solar in his eyes.” And, sassy as ever, Teigen replied, “He instructed me he loves it.” The drama does not finish there. The 32-year-old was later accused of being a foul instance to her daughter Luna when she pretended to steal from a Sephora retailer, which prompted the cookbook creator to make a disclaimer: “EDIT: DO NOT EVER STEAL OR PRETEND TO STEAL YOUR FRIEND’S @THEOUAI TESTERS IN FRONT OF EMPLOYEES. ONE, BECAUSE IT’S WRONG, BUT TWO, IT WILL STARTLE EXTREMELY ANNOYING PEOPLE INTO BEING EXTREMELY OFFENDED ON THE ‘GRAM.” Article continues beneath Evan Agostini/Invision/A Brittany Aldean Whereas on trip within the Bahamas, Jason Aldean and his spouse got here underneath hearth for leaving their child at residence, simply months after his start. So the brand new mother took this as a possibility to teach the haters, saying on Instagram, “Only a phrase of knowledge for all of the parent shamers… holidays are okay for brand spanking new dad and mom to take. Typically after being pregnant for nearly a yr, cooped up in a home for weeks at a time, you want a bit of sunshine and grownup time.” “When you do not agree with one thing, please… do me a favor and unfollow me. You’ll not be missed,” Brittany stated. Instagram Kendra Wilkinson In an emotional publish, the 32-year-old defended her actions—like playing video games drunk—within the weeks following her divorce from husband Hank Baskett. She instructed her Instagram followers, “I bust my ass off as a human being. I work, pay payments, handle 2 children and love them to the fullest plus making an attempt to handle myself via all of it is a 24/7 job. I do not know what the f–k a few of u haters assume u know however you higher get your heads checked as a result of your assumptions based mostly on photos and clips of exhibits make u straight up delusional.” “I drink to have a good time solely and I take pleasure in my mates. At some point I will get the credit score I deserve for all of the exhausting work I do however til’ then I will preserve doing me,” the star completed. Instagram Christina El Moussa Most just lately, the Flip or Flop star was criticized for a photograph of her toddler standing by the pool. The Instagram person claimed she was not accusing the star of being a foul mom, saying, “Nobody is a hater, however as a mom it’s scary to have a toddler being that near a pool!” The designer, who has come underneath mommy-fire earlier than, rapidly clapped again, “OMG 1. It is a seashore entry if he fell in it is solely a foot excessive, he could be okay 2. It is not his first time in or across the pool, however thanks in your “concern” aka judgment 3. AND most significantly I’m proper there and might be to him in Three seconds SMH at this …..!!!!” Article continues beneath Khloe Kardashian/Instagram Kim Kardashian After the truth star posted about North West‘s first swimming lesson again in December 2013, a Twitter troll snarked on the E! star, writing it was good to see mom and daughter collectively “for a change.” Kim tweeted proper again, “U sound so ignorant. Bc I do not tweet or instagram my each transfer w my daughter means I’m not along with her 247? We share what we would like. Or is it bc I’m going assist my fiance at each present & I publish pix? When the child goes down Four mattress or a nap, dad and mom are allowed 2 work & assist one another, perhaps even have enjoyable too.” Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP Kristin Cavallari In 2016, the previous actuality star took warmth on social media from individuals who thought her sons looked too thin in an image she posted of them of their swim vehicles. “Yep, I starve my kids. Simply blocked the most individuals I’ve ever blocked in my total life. Completely happy 4th hahaha,” she tweeted; the previous Laguna Seaside star adopted later with, “I really like that persons are sending me articles in regards to the risks of being a vegan. Perhaps ship it to somebody that is truly vegan.” Chrissy Teigen/Instagram Chrissy Teigen After coping with tons of mommy shaming, John Legend’s woman love, who had at one level switched her Twitter feed to non-public, preemptively addressed mommy-shaming points when she posted a video in 2016 of Luna with the caption, “We miss you, papa!! Cannot wait so that you can come residence! (Sure she has rosy eczema cheeks, sure we’re taking good care of it, no it isn’t a gluten allergy, no it isn’t our make-up, no it isn’t from our fragrance, sure she’s only a child).” Article continues beneath Hilary Duff/Instagram Hilary Duff The actress/singer someway stirred up controversy when she posted a photograph smooching her son Luca, which many took situation with. She finally replied “For anybody commenting {that a} kiss on the lips with my four-year-old is ‘inappropriate’ go forward and click on a fast unfollow along with your warped minds and judgment.” kolini pictures Amanda Stanton “I do not usually like to handle the trolls/mother shamers … however it’s so uncontrolled!” the Bachelor in Paradise star started within the message posted to her Instagram Story in June. “I might prefer to take a second to make clear initially that my children DO have a father that’s a part of their life. They spend time with him too. So if you happen to see a photograph of me with out my children one weekend and remark one thing like ‘mom of the yr’ or ‘wow should not she be along with her children?’ Effectively, there is a VERY good probability that I can not be with them as a result of they’re with their dad.” Stanton and her ex-husband of three years, Nick Buonfiglio, share daughters Charlie and Kinsley. Instagram Sarah Stage Whereas pregnant along with her second little one, the Six Pack Mother hit again at “ignorant” physique shamers, who took issue along with her match being pregnant kind. In August, the social media star, who was 7-months-pregnant, wrote, “Our our bodies are actually unbelievable & I really feel blessed to have the ability to develop one other wholesome child within me! I select to remain constructive & I symbolize anybody who has handled doubters, trolls & bullies. It feels nice to show ignorant individuals mistaken & even higher to know that every one you must do is imagine in your self and belief your individual instincts.” Article continues beneath Instagram Jessie James Decker “You already know, it’s form of exhausting typically since you really feel like you must filter what you publish in some methods,” Jessie revealed to E! Information in August. “I will by no means publish an image of my children of their automobile seats anymore as a result of I will get schooled on how I am not doing it accurately or it turns into this argument.” She continued, “I am not going to publish photos of them within the backseat consuming their snacks. It is not value it anymore—you ruined it!” Michael Loccisano/Getty Photos Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi The party-loving Jersey Shore alum and mom of two took to Instagram earlier this yr to fireside again at individuals who criticized her parenting, a day earlier than Mom’s Day. “So pleased with my little woman! ,” she wrote, alongside a photograph of her carrying her little woman inside a gymnasium, the place the kid had taken half in a children’ dance recital. “(As an alternative of not posting my children for the individuals who respect and admire their images , I’ll flip off the feedback part. I do not want a–holes telling me easy methods to elevate my little one and decide them. I am a rattling good mother and know what I am doing. Effectively more often than not.),” Snooki continued. Instagram Kim Kardashian “So I took a photograph of Saint and he was sitting ahead and they also say for his age, he must be rear-facing,” Kim stated in a video posted on her app in August. She’d been criticized on-line for the seat’s place. “However what individuals did not know is that Saint is now the load and the peak requirement to sit down forward-facing.” “Saint truly weighs greater than North,” Kim stated about her and Kanye’s eldest little one, 4-year-old daughter North West. “If that’s plausible, he does, and it’s wild,” she added. Article continues beneath Rochelle Brodin/Getty Photos for Haute Dwelling Jada Pinkett Smith Again in 2012, the actress was criticized for letting her daughter Willow Smith lower her hair and she or he took the chance to show individuals about feminine empowerment. “The query why I’d LET Willow lower her hair. First the LET should be challenged,” the actress wrote on Fb. “It is a world the place ladies, women are always reminded that they do not belong to themselves; that their our bodies will not be their very own, nor their energy or self dedication.” “I made a promise to endow my little woman with the facility to at all times know that her physique, spirit and her thoughts are HER area,” she added. “Willow lower her hair as a result of her magnificence, her worth, her value just isn’t measured by the size of her hair. It is also a press release that claims that even little women have the RIGHT to personal themselves and shouldn’t be a slave to even their mom’s deepest insecurities, hopes and wishes.” Rick Diamond/Bravo/NBCU Picture Financial institution by way of Getty Photos Kim Zolciak-Biermann “My candy, sensible, motivated princess @arianabiermann she has the most important [heart] and is much more lovely on the within and also you LOW LIFE assholes who’ve the audacity to make your impolite feedback, ‘she lastly misplaced weight’ ‘she lastly got here into her personal’ WTF is mistaken with you!” the Do not Be Tardy star wrote when individuals commented negatively abut her daughter Ariana‘s weight in 2015.   “You’re the drawback with society. What possesses you to sit down behind a pc and write a adverse remark?!!!! are you able to think about if you happen to took the time to write down one thing constructive or nothing in any respect how great this world could be!!! You permit my child alone she is a toddler!!!! Bought it!!!” Do not miss E! Information each weeknight at 7, solely on E! https://www.eonline.com/information/1043921/how-ayesha-curry-khloe-kardashian-and-more-celebs-fire-back-at-mommy-shamers?cmpid=rss-000000-rssfeed-365-topstories&utm_source=eonline&utm_medium=rssfeeds&utm_campaign=rss_topstories The post How Ayesha Curry, Khloe Kardashian and Extra Celebs Hearth Again at Mommy Shamers appeared first on Kartia Velino. https://kartiavelino.com/how-ayesha-curry-khloe-kardashian-and-more-celebs-fire-back-at-mommy-shamers/

[princeleyjeans]

One of the big ‘Feature points’ in my sharmoota fic (If it ever gets finished Im so sorry) was/is that Michael let his hair grow, longer than what he can get in game and during a girls day with Amanda (they become bffs after the divorce), they head to a rave to get Tracey back from her most recent dodgy bf and wind up joining the party since Franks already come to the rescue (Sub plot is them getting close to dating while he’s trying to win back his ex because Frank is hella complicated too) and taken her to his place for some Fame Or Shame and Chop smooches.  The scene is cheesy but sorta meaningful when Amanda points out how comfortable M must be to be in a crowd with his hair so long and messy and fucked up from the beach air and running around looking for their daughter, its like happy/sad/hella emotional to see how much he’s changed and happier Mike seems since coming out/getting his life semi on track.  It’s one of those finals, like she hasn’t just love her husband, she’s lost HER Michael, She’s love the man she fell for while T’s got a semi revamped version of his Michael, if not a little fatter, more prone to crying and eating all the ice cream.  You get it, the idea is hella sad

[romcomathon2016]

Sleeping with Other People (USA, 2015)

Predictions: Kat saw this movie when it came out. Alex, half-remembering maybe having read its summary at some point, predicted that Alison Brie and Jason Sudeikis meet in a sex-addicts support group, hook up with each other, and then are afflicted with feelings.

Plot: Well, clearly Alex did read the summary for this movie, although she also obviously forgot some parts. Alison Brie and Jason Sudeikis first meet in college because Alison Brie is stalking Adam Scott, her TA. Jason Sudeikis lives on Adam Scott’s floor and rescues Alison Brie. They lose their virginities to each other and then don’t see each other again for twelve years. THEN they run into each other at a sex-addicts support group. Jason Sudeikis is a cheater cheater pumpkin eater who can’t stop two-timing...three-timing...four-timing the ladies. Alison Brie is also cheating — but only with Adam Scott. Adam Scott with a tiny unbearable mustache. She and Jason Sudeikis reconnect and decide to become friends.

Jason Sudeikis helps Alison Brie kick her Adam-Scott habit because Adam Scott is now engaged (even though he keeps calling Alison Brie anyway), while Alison Brie...well, encourages Jason Sudeikis to try to connect with women outside of sex. Meanwhile, Alison Brie has also gotten into med school, and Jason Sudeikis is playing the long game in wooing his boss, Amanda Peet. But pretty much everyone in Alison Brie and Jason Sudeikis’s lives — including the two of them — kind of thinks that they are together. But, no, they’re just friends.

Such good friends, you guys. They are just the most platonic of pals, with their snuggling and their pet names and Jason Sudeikis teaching Alison Brie how to touch herself. This is all stuff people do with their friends. Such good friends. May we all be blessed with such friendships. Friendships that we don’t want to ruin or complicate with our obvious non-friend feelings.

Things are going fine until Jason Sudeikis and Alison Brie attend Jason Mantzoukas’s kid’s birthday party. While rolling on molly, Alison Brie manages to unwittingly attract a hot single dad. Much to Jason Sudeikis’s dismay, she goes out with him. Hot Single Dad takes Alison Brie to a fancy mixer, where she runs into — surprise! — Adam Scott and his shitty little mustache wife. Devastated, she tries to call Jason Sudeikis. However, he doesn’t pick up, because he has finally managed to con Amanda Peet into a date. At the end of the night, the two of them meet up again at Jason Sudeikis’s apartment, snuggle up in bed, and admit that they are in love with each other. “But what are two platonic in-love pals to do?” Alison Brie inquires. “Nothing,” Jason Sudeikis says, with his big emo eyes. “Absolutely nothing.” (We may be paraphrasing, but barely.)

With that, Alison Brie moves to Michigan to attend med school, and she and Jason Sudeikis say goodbye forever. Which is weird, because now we all have Facebook, so… But okay, sure. Two months go by. Jason Sudeikis is now like...boyfriend of the year to Amanda Peet?? Like, taking her kid to soccer and surprising her with a birthday trip to France???? But one day, while at brunch with her, he spies A Certain Mustache sitting across the way. How can one miss that mustache? Of course, Jason Sudeikis is filled with the urge to punch said mustache in the face. This effectively terminates both Mustache’s brunch and Jason Sudeikis's relationship with Amanda Peet.

He calls Alison Brie from the police station, partly because no one else will bail him out and partly to yell that he loves her. She yells enthusiastically back. Shortly after, Jason Sudeikis is trying to settle an emotional distress lawsuit with Dr. Mustache (oh yeah, he’s a doctor), but Mustache won’t budge. Alison Brie goes to see Mustache to cut ties and blackmail him into letting Jason Sudeikis off the hook. It works. She and Jason Sudeikis walk off into the sunset to have a quickie before they get hitched.

Best Scene: Jason Mantzoukas’s kid’s birthday party. Alison Brie and Jason Sudeikis dance together while on molly, which is pretty delightful, and then are miserable coming off it, which is also delightful. Then she gets approached by Hot Single Dad, and Jason Sudeikis is real bad at hiding his jealousy. Love it.

Worst Scene: Alison Brie trying to break things off with Adam Scott at the beginning. Oh my god, the first sighting of the MUSTACHE. But also, he is such a pretentious douche. Why is Adam Scott always a douche in movies?? Though we shouldn’t complain. Without "adam scott romantic comedy douche," we would not have this blog.

Best Line: "Yeah, it's like Ted Bundy. You can't get them into a van by just being a jerk. You've got to have a certain way about you." — Jason Sudeikis, talking about Alison Brie being an “approachable psychotic.” There were a lot of very funny lines though. This one just particularly made us laugh.

Worst Line: “Because I’d rather fail with you than win with anyone else.” — Jason Sudeikis, who was pretty much always very amusing and witty...unless he was declaring his feelings, at which point he would immediately become disgusting. Several. Times.

Highlights of the Watching Experience: So many famous people in this movie! Early on, Alison Brie breaks up with Adam Brody in a restaurant, and he has a very funny flip-out. It’s a nice bit role. Also, her best friend before she falls in love with Jason Sudeikis is Natasha Lyonne, playing yet another lesbian. Does she ever play non-lesbians? Has she just been lesbian-typecast? Discuss.

How Many POC in the Film: ...Where to begin. Um. So, we have discussed on this blog in the past the crucial and controversial question: are Greeks POC? (We think yes in old-timey Europe, but probably not in modern-day America.) Anyway, Jason Mantzoukas is Greek. Some people, however, seem to think that because he has curly hair and is the color of Scar from The Lion King that he is...black???? Clearly, the casting directors of this film thought so, because his kids are DEFINITELY THE KIDS ONE WOULD CAST if one parent was white and the other was black. Those are some freaking adorable, Afro-having, mixed-race kids. On the one hand, how...nice?? that they are...celebrating...interracial...families???? On the other hand, while we may not know if Greeks are POC, I think we can all agree that they're not black.

Alternate Scenes: How about, instead of a live-action Lion King starring CGI-ed lions, we just cast humans, AKA Jason Mantzoukas in the role of Scar? (You can't un-see it now, can you? You’re welcome.)

Was the Poster Better or Worse than the Film: ...Worse? The movie is about two people who like each other but aren't having sex, whereas the poster seems to be about two people who hate each other and aren't having sex. The poster is the poster for a movie about Jason Sudeikis and Alison Brie's crumbling marriage. Maybe she just tried to drown him, so they're talking about whether sleeping with other people would improve their relationship.

Score: 8.5 out of 10 platonic-pal smooches. It was so hard to score this one, you guys, because, on the one hand, it's pretty recent, so who knows if it will stand the test of time...? But, on the other hand, is there anything we love more than best friends who are secretly in love???????? (This is a normal thing for two actual best friends to love. Not pathological at all. WHAT? SHUT UP. WE DON’T HAVE A PROBLEM. YOUR FACE HAS A PROBLEM.)

Ranking: 7, out of the 82 movies we’ve seen so far. Kat can't remember why she originally told Alex this movie was only okay???? Maybe she loved it too much and couldn't handle her feelings, much like Jason Sudeikis and Alison Brie.

[romcomathon2016]

A Lot Like Love (USA, 2005)

Predictions: Kat had already seen this movie several years ago, at the passionate urging of her friend Leigh, but she did not remember it very well. Alex, annoyed by the film's vague title, predicted that maybe two people meet and initially dislike each other...but then...um...discover that actually their animosity is a lot like love?? Maybe????

Plot: AMANDA PEET AND ASHTON KUTCHER FALL IN LOVE TO THE MOST BEAUTIFUL, EXTREMELY 2005 SOUNDTRACK. THE END.

Jk, we will give you an actual plot summary. Ashton Kutcher, a person with terrible hair, is dropped off at the airport in Los Angeles and immediately spots Amanda Peet, a girl going through an equally terrible goth phase, being dropped off by her musician boyfriend. He is intrigued by her, but she is not pleasant. But then they fuck on the plane. But then, afterwards, when they land in New York, she wants nothing to do with him. In spite of this, for some reason, they hang out a little bit, and she takes some photos with his camera. He totally wants to do her again, but she is like, whatever, dude. They talk about their lives, and he tells her about his plan to be really successful and married in six years. She lols at this, as we would as well, but he gives her his parents' phone number and bets her $50 that, if she calls it in six years, she will discover that this plan has worked out exactly as he planned.

Three years later, however, Amanda Peet -- who has turned into a completely different person, btw; an actress, dating a douchey writer, hanging out with some hilariously basic friends -- gets unceremoniously dumped and needs a date for some fancy New Year's Eve party. Who can I call? she wonders, on the day of the party. What loser would be available? Ashton Kutcher. He would be available. She calls him at his parents', and they go out and have a great time. They go back to his empty apartment, because, surprise, he's actually NOT living in his parents' basement, and she is charmed to discover that he still has that camera and framed one of the pictures she took. How nice. Alas, less nice: Ashton Kutcher’s apartment is empty because he is moving to San Francisco TOMORROW to start his...diaper business???? Sure, sure. Thus Ashton Kutcher flies off towards his successful future, leaving a regretful Amanda Peet behind. He does, however, gift her the camera.

Two years after THAT -- predictably, Amanda Peet has become a photographer. When Ashton Kutcher gets dumped by his girlfriend for being such a diaper-business workaholic, he turns up on her doorstep in LA, and they have some more quality rebound times together. Amanda Peet is like, whoa, finally! This is it! but Ashton Kutcher just wants to whine about his breakup. In spite of this, however, they actually do enjoy each other. They go on a road trip to Joshua Tree, take a naked open-shutter photo in the night, and, of course, have sex in the car. But then Ashton Kutcher runs off again, because he has a venture-capital meeting in New York with his pal Kal Penn. Zomg! Great success! Their business is booming! But alas, this just means he still can't be with Amanda Peet, because said business is in San Francisco, and she is in Los Angeles.

Another year passes. Ashton Kutcher's business folds. He pretty much hits rock-bottom and goes back to actually live with his parents. His brother gives him some good advice, however, and he decides to go seek out Amanda Peet, thinking, well, she's probably the one. After some light stalking, he manages to show up at her home and make a big display of his love. AND SHE TOTALLY LOVES HIM BACK, YOU GUYS!!!! ...Except, awkward, she's engaged. Really?? Really, Amanda Peet?? You are already engaged to the guy you met one year ago???? Just seems a little hasty to us, but OKAY. Cool beans. Crushed, Ashton Kutcher slinks back to his parents' with his tail between his legs.

Six more months go by. (Last time jump, guys, we promise!) Ashton Kutcher and Amanda Peet are both real bummed about the fact that she is engaged. Amanda Peet is so bummed, in fact, that she gets un-engaged and goes to find him, using some light stalking techniques of her own. But oh no! There is a wedding happening at his house!!!! IS HE NOW GETTING MARRIED???? AFTER SIX MONTHS???? Jk, it's okay, it's his sister's wedding. They make out.

Best Scene: There are actually a bunch! Who knew?? When Ashton Kutcher is complaining incessantly about his breakup, and Amanda Peet turns up the music and sings over him, on their road trip. When Amanda Peet refuses to tell Ashton Kutcher about her breakup, and they have a very funny, dramatic, silent squabble in a Chinese restaurant. Basically, almost any time they were hanging out after Ashton Kutcher cut his hair was pretty great.

Worst Scene: ...Too much of a cop-out to just say, Ashton Kutcher's hair? Okay, fine, fine. This movie didn't have any scenes that made us want to claw our own eyes out, but there were a few minor contact-embarrassment moments. When she got dumped by the douchey writer was kind of awkward. Ashton Kutcher's VC presentation was also kind of awkward. Meh. Shrug.

Best Line: After their magical night in Joshua Tree, as Ashton Kutcher is saying goodbye to Amanda Peet, he tries to say that he needs to work through his feelings about his ex, but then he can’t remember her name. It's pretty funny. We also enjoyed when Ashton Kutcher confided in a random airline worker, and, after his long rant about the obstacles between him and Amanda Peet, she just went, "So...you won't be traveling with us to Los Angeles then?" Finally, special mention to the title-inspiring line, "Well, if it wasn't love, it was a lot like it," and to their eventual getting-together scene, for not making us want to vomit.

Worst Line: No lines in this movie stood out as horrible!!!! Hugely impressive.

Highlights of the Watching Experience: OMG, YOU GUYS, THIS SOUNDTRACK. From the moment "Semi-Charmed Life" began playing in the first scene, we knew it was going to be a great time. There's nothing quite like reliving your favorite mid-2000s mix tape while people with okay hair make out on your television screen. Also, Kat loves Amanda Peet and found it very rewarding how often she wore and didn't wear clothes in this film.

How Many POC in the Film: Kal Penn. Ashton Kutcher's girlfriend. Chinese waitress. Girl on plane. Although we were pleasantly surprised by, when they were walking on the street in NYC, how many people of color were actually in the crowd. It was like they were actually on a street in NYC!

Alternate Scenes: The movie about Ashton Kutcher’s brother, Tyrone Giordano, and (presumably) his wife! We enjoyed Tyrone Giordano a lot -- found both him and his relationship with Ashton Kutcher very charming -- and we’ve never seen a romcom with a deaf protagonist before, so. That would be fun. Also, Amanda Peet has this real dumb thing about how Ashton Kutcher didn’t make the first move, and that’s a strike against him, but then she eventually realizes that he kind of did (not really), and thus she can leave her fiancé to be with him?? We exaggerate, but only slightly. WHY SO HUNG UP ON THE “FIRST MOVE,” AMANDA PEET?? Anyway, so, the alternate version of this movie where that wasn’t a plot point, or at least not a semi-pivotal one. And, lastly, the ending felt slightly rushed, so we would have liked a little more from that portion of the film.

Was the Poster Better or Worse than the Film: Worse. The poster is fine but, much like the title, not at all descriptive. (On the other hand, though, the poster does not feature Ashton Kutcher's terrible Clinton-era hair, so. It was close.)

Score: 6.5 out of 10 extremely-slow-burn smooches. While we didn't find this script to be especially inspired, we were inspired by how we didn't hate any of it. Also, the Ashton Kutcher/Amanda Peet combination was, to our surprise, both charming and funny.

Ranking: 15, out of the 65 movies we've watched so far. We decided that, while significantly more romantically-investable than America's Sweethearts, it was not nearly as well-written. However, it still managed to beat out How to Be Single, because they actually freaking got together.