#and eating over 800 2 times a week isnt so bad. ill still lose weight. i feel bad tho. like im not disordered enough

[tinylittlebab]

2/10/23

goal: 1000 / total: 821 / extra burned: 100 / net: 720 / weight: 94.5

disappointed in this. wouldve been less but i kinda blanked while eating goldfish and forgot to count them out bc i was too busy sorting them. oops. well its not that bad. i didnt end up getting to do my usual stuff so the day was very hard. i had planned to wait to eat till later or not at all but around 8pm i started feeling very ill and shakey so i decided to eat. unfortunate but whatever.

mad at myself for being hungry this morning since i had over 800 yesterday. my body is so pathetic. i fed it so much yesterday but even still.

[anonymousreductionjournal]

First off, this is a weight loss journal

The background: I've always been larger. A couple of years ago, I did a fairly strict and extreme diet (in a personally safe way) and was able to lose a lot of weight in just a couple months (around 60lbs / 27.25kg in 2.5 months) but was promoted to manager at my old job.

Things got super stressful and I fell off watching my weight and started stress eating. Eventually the stress eating became habitual and while I am at a much more laid back job now, I'm not healthy by any means and I weigh more than I originally did.

I lost my old scale when I moved so I hadn't weighed myself in some time and finally did and it was like a punch to the gut to read the number.

So I made this sideblog to document my numbers and progress.

My information and rules to my diet and personal rules for my blog below:

Blog rules:

First and foremost, while I may occasionally interact with potentially pro-ana posts, this is primarily for recipes and as a whole, I do not support anorexia. Numerically speaking, as per the rules of my diet, some can consider it falling under anorexia in the long term but one of my main rules for my own diet is that if I am feeling unwell or sick, the diet is called off for the day or extra consumption is added but more details will be added further down.

Second; I am an adult. I suffer from bad body dysmorphia regarding my size and even for the sake of progress, I do not photograph myself and will not share photos of myself on here. The only pictures I might share will be of meals I enjoyed with the recipes for later reference

Third; I am not expecting followers as this is mainly a tagless blog (aside for a specifically unique tag for the aforementioned meal posts) but considering the mental health, the extremes to which people can take diets, and self body image of people, I will block any minor that follows this blog. I do not want to endorse the idea of extreme diets to minors. Be safe and smart.

Diet rules:

1. Food content does not matter outside of calorie count. I do not care how many carbs or what the level of transfats are in a food, I specifically only count calories

2. Calorie restriction is going to be averaged at 1000 per day with some minor wiggle room. I will aim for 1000, if I hit 1200, itd be disappointing but is still in the weight loss range and isnt a big deal. I will not go above 1500. If I do go above 1500, the remainder would be reduced from a strict 1000 the following day. For example, if I eat 1700 cal, the 200 over would be removed from the next day, aiming for now 800.

2. 1 day a week will be allotted for a cheat day. I can but probably wont count calories on this day. This is for when I spend time with friends or have meals with my partner on a mutual day off, or to just eat unhealthy fast food.

3. The following day will usually be a fast day

The typical schedule is that my partner and I typically have sundays off together (minus my occasional working sunday) so my diet schedule would be Tues-Sat, cheat Sunday, Fast Monday. But the days arent definite as it more revolves around availability of friends and such when I will have the cheat day.

And most importantly

4. The diet will be on hold if I am ill. If I am horribly sick, or struggling for the day and feeling like I might pass out or having unending horrible migraines that keep me from doing my job, the diet is canceled for the day. I will eat so I feel better and I will not hold it against myself and I will not reduce or fast the following day (unless its currently a cheat day, in which case feeling ill should be unrelated to the diet anyway)

5. Not a definite rule, but I will attempt to post basic weights daily for me here. These posts will be very short, just the date and weight, with body measurements potentially once a week. Weights will be taken in just underwear for consistency and accuracy. While I have "they" in my bio, I have a male body so if you see measurements for bust/waist/hips/thighs, take this into consideration. Thigh measurements is the circumference of my right thigh, not both thighs at the same time.

----

I dont really have an end goal at the moment, anything is better than what it is right now. I may set periodic goals but considering I cant adjust my diet further, I cant plan to weigh this or that by a certain date. The previous time I did this diet, I lost 20+lbs/9+kgs a month but I had a job on my feet versus my current desk job so rates will differ from last time.

Please dont give me hate or attack posts for me being large, I know I am and that is why I am starting this.

April 3rd, 2024

Edit, all weights should be applied to my physical height of 6'2 / 187cm