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empathdespoina · 3 years

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Who am I?

Unfortunately I was not able to put a title on my first post; since I was using the app on my iphone, late at night on composing that first post.

In this area, I’m going by the name Despoina.

Why that name you ask?

Well one, I like that name being one of the few daughters of Poseidon and use it for my video games characters. But mostly it’s so no one sees my real name and try to search for me. I’ve seen enough crazy things in this world, to know smart people who are good at internet tracing on finding people. To give examples you don’t have to look to far for a few “Karens” who were caught on social media being racists as fuck and found their job and where they live; causing them to lose their job. Which is good social justice; but even in the same breath people who are doing good could be found by the wrong people...for example a Judge, that this person didn’t like her and was hoping to kill her before the upcoming case, in regards to him or someone else close to him... instead the crazy killed her son, who was trying to protect his father and she wasn’t home; and this was found out due to her address being public knowledge as a Judge, now think how dangerous that is for those who don’t want to go to jail and figure they can get away, killing the Judge to not have a court case (which is stupid, due to the fact that person would get a different Judge assigned to the case). And more recently what could have happened with the Montana Governor. So pardon me if I prefer to be called by this.

Also to be honest my photo image is probably in my mid 20s... I’m 34yrs old as this is being composed. I thought this photo of me in a bath tub under water... seem best to symbolize my account. And the fact most Empaths are comfortable around water.

When did I learn I was and Empath and fully commit to it?

Well I oddly found out when I was briefly living in Las Vegas for a few short years and I found my path along the lines of practicing Wicca; which I felt a better connection to, compared to the religions I was brought up on. So one store I went to called the “Psychic Eye” was having a psych class lesson that was a mix of different things to learn about different psychic gift abilities. The person who was running the class, a nice old lady; who could hold her own authority, and be sweet too. I forget how exactly it started...but one day I was last to leave this short weekly session and we were talking. She asked me a few questions and one that stuck to me was “Do you feel comfortable around water?” I told her yes. She informed me that I was an empath and I could feel other people’s feelings. Now some might think...that this woman was leading me on...but the minute she told me Empath... its as if something click in my mind from my subconscious to my conscious, saying this is the piece I’m missing to better understanding myself.

Heh after that I found a meetup group for those learning about Wicca... and wasn’t necessarily working towards controlling my abilities as an empath. Since around that time... I had got rid of the toxic people around me...who wanted to draw off my energy. Yet it was this one night at a Denny’s...where the group met up, every so often. That I felt my chakra points, which I had already learned about those points and did brief reading of books about empaths; that my Heart and Solar Plexus Chakra points were being hit hard as fuck. It felt as if someone speed up my heart out of nowhere and making me feel sick to my stomach...after I had just finish eating my food, ten minutes prior. There was also someone else in that group getting hit by it too. And unfortunately for me...I didn’t have any of my stones with me to help me focus, nor be able to shield myself or be able push out this person’s energy that LITTERLY was consuming me... almost like when Venom engulfs Spider-man or any other Marvel Hero. Someone let me grab onto a stone that was a keychain on their bag.. and I was looking around as if I was in high tide with ripe tide added into it find where in the hell this was coming from. I was able to zone in on the person, almost like a radar single but in a different way. It was a young woman with a man and judging by her body expressions she was breaking up with him.... now I wasn’t that far away from them; nor was she shouting loud to draw attention to her from the restaurant.

Later in my life I would have two other moments my chakra points were taking me over... but that be a story for another time...because the experiences were way way different; especially my second experience...compared to the Denny’s one.

Later on in my life, I would on and off read e-book on amazon about empaths and surprisingly enough; there seems to be a higher level of this genre as e-books. It’s only recently during COVID, and me still without a job and having to deal with my mom doing a close fracture (meaning bone didn’t break through the skin) on her right ankle and I had to be downstairs every single day since September 9. Which wasn’t that great because my mother and I are not close (another story about that and my empath abilities being taken advantage of); so I decided to start reading books and worked on focusing again about being an Empath and controlling my abilities. I did buy four small books from Barnes and Nobles...where mostly were really really small. Majority were good and some I question the author or author pissed me off on their school of thought process on being an Empath.

At this point I would say, I am having a better grasp at shielding myself.. which took a bit to figure out; since there is NO real way on how to do it. There’s constant talk in the many books I’ve read about shielding yourself and keeping it up; to ward off the negative energy and only get a taste of the emotions to know what’s going on with the person. Yet sadly I couldn’t due that, until I asked one of the owners at “Amityville Apothecary”, who gave me pointers on a way to do it and it worked. I will share that in another blog, down the road...I have a few points or a process on how I want to put these posts out. Kinda like teaching a lesson (was an art teacher, briefly)...in hopes of making it easier for others.

Why did you want to start this blog?

Why is because I’m starting to notice a few more people close to me and some people I interact with don’t know that they’re empaths... and unfortunately with these past four years under Trump and his encouragement to do negative things to others. Interesting enough I did a search to see what the professionals would psychoanalyze him as (which is not an official diagnosis, but based on past experience with other patients and/or studies on mental health) and he would be considered a Narcissi Personality Border. Pretty much he was obsess as a child to please his sociopathy father that showed no emotions and how he had Daddy issues and clung to Putain and North Korea’s Great Leader (yes as bad as this was to see this dictator of North Korea, I am still impress another nation’s governing person was able to talk to him; besides South Korea always trying. Hey it’s not the best thing, but I give credit on that...knowing how North Korea keeps others out so much); so these two had similarities to how his daddy was; when Trump’s father was alive. It’s like Daddy issues mixed with the crazy thought process of the main character in Talladega Nights movie on having to be the best and a person with God-like complex or spoiled child on getting their way...seeing how people are afraid to say NO to him and him getting away with a lot of things. It seriously makes me question his mental state of mind and even more once he’s out of office.

Sorry I got a bit off topic...but due to Trump being this crazy and erratic and not being punish; including those around him were afraid to say no to literally a crazy man...and to be honest seeing some people not as bad as Trump; is pretty fucken scary. Well it encourage other people who were secret assholes and sociopaths and everything else mentally wrong in the brain...to disregard society’s standard of right and wrong...just let their evil side out and more people were getting killed by others; you had people who were not white, being trailed by crazy white people. And all those people who are Trump supporters and not right in the head. All this chaos this president has created and made it even worst this year with COVID...proving he didn’t care about others and just wanted people to fight each other...so no one would care about what was happening in the world and not pay attention to the fact, he wasn’t doing his job properly as a President. Which some of us in this world were wiser to know; especially how he treated the virus, even after getting it.

So of course there’s going to be a heavier rise of negative energy, compared to the past years; and love ones around you and friends believing all the social media garbage from the republicans. And no matter what, you can’t have a healthy mind conversation about who would become President...where for example my mom thought Biden’s campaign design symbolized China...which I know she’s been using Facebook a lot lately and see all those false information and not cross checking the information to be true and her friend who survived cancer...also on facebook; and I know this friend is going through chemical brain...because I’ve seen it before in others and how it changes the person completely.

And I have been hearing, from those I play dungeons and dragons; and them feeling things much harder. And then recently talking to the vet, due taking the older family dog, Buddy for a visit, and for me to realize that she was an animal empath; based on the comments at this animal hospital she works for on being nicknamed “Dr. Death” due to how gentle she is on putting the animal down; and she feels the animals’ pain...and yet she doesn’t know how to control it and she’s got to be in her late 50s. Then there is the Vet’s daughter, who feels people’s energies far much harder than me...that she’s thought of suicide a few times, visiting the hospitals due to that and putting her on psych meds...when the case is; is that if her daughter was taken to a positive area, she be alright. No psych meds required or being in a psych ward.

So honestly I want this blog to help other people, to make them feel less crazy about themselves and not give into negativity on being told how different you as a person reacts with your feelings, compared to others. And lastly, I think there’s a higher need of people learning about empaths and knowing if they are full blown or have some abilities; because we need to find a way to control the raging storm in the USA. Plus it helps bring you to a better understanding of yourself; since we are such complex people. So come along this journey with me as I teach you about Empaths and the abilities associated with this gift.

So blessed be and may the sun give you the strength to rise for the day; as the moon soothes you at night and your troubles away.

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