#and i can't fucking get it to look nice bc my eyes are being morons

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

Struggling to put on my eyeliner bc my eyes keep blurring and getting big blind spots and frankly I'm ready to kill someone.

[here4theheartbreak]

I'd love to hear more about your experience at the ooo fansign, if you'd like to share. I can't imagine what it would be like to be up close to the boys. I feel I might die from awkwardness, but they look warm and relaxed and your photos are so cute!

Hiiii - I saw this and meant to respond but I've been out all day so I'm just getting a chance to sit down and compile my thoughts about it now. It's a really long post - I have talked to friends about bits of it, but never really sat down and wrote it all out - so I'm putting it under a cut.

Fansign

The fansign - and all the engagements really - were so overwhelming and fun. I've done hi touches before, but this was a whole new level. I was a few rows back hanging out with another Rie stan; she was teasing me bc Junji was at the start of the line and Rie wasn't until the end - I wasn't sure how I was going to face Junji first. I also had gifts to give them, so I had to somehow make my fingers and mouth work. Junji was super sweet, he's got such a nice smile. He's so loud though - I was anticipating him being the quiet, easy one, but no, you could hear him across the venue - he was so happy with everyone. Just shouting "HELLO" - bless him. Nine too - he's so handsome in person, but not like... Intimidatingly so? I was worried about it with him but he was one of the easier members to interact with throughout the night. Kyubin was super easy and nice as well, and then Rie.

I interacted with Rie 4 times that night and every one was embarrassing or overwhelming 🤦🏻‍♂️ - what did I do when I saw Rie for the first time? Made eye contact with him and gasped in his fucking face. I couldn't help it, he was so much more handsome than I anticipated and his gaze is so intense. Apparently I gasped loudly bc his eyes widened a bit and he looked somewhat concerned before smirking and greeting me. I slid his envelope over like a moron and moved on (I think I muttered a hi, thank you? I'm not sure tbh - I blacked out). Then there was Yoojung (who is so pretty oh my god.) But he was very quiet and gentle, but unfortunately he came up right after Rie so I was still reeling through him and Mill.

Afterward we ended up meeting and befriending a lyOn standing in front of us because they overheard a dirty comment my friend made and cracked up so hard they almost fell over 🙈 (you know those moments where it's super loud and you're safe to talk - then as soon as you say the thing it's quiet? That happened. Not "quiet" but our little area of people was just quiet enough for this person to hear us).

Hi-Touch/Photo

Then afterward was the hi-touch and group photo; I was prepared this time. Or so I thought. Junji was fine - he's got massive hands omg. But he's so very gentle, I didn't realize just how nice that was until later in the night. Nine was so happy and grinny and bubbly - his normal hyper self. (Side note, Nine was wearing his crop top and idk how he managed to have both the firmest washboard abs while simultaneously looking like he has the softest tummy - his skin is eerily perfect.). Kyubin was very professional, and unfortunately I don't think I gave him all the attention that I could have, because I knew Rie was coming.

When I reached him I looked anywhere but his eyes - I wasn't going to be stupid. I would say thank you, touch his hand, and that was it. He fucking noticed - I swear to God he did. Maybe it was a coincidence, but I was purposely looking at his mouth/neck when I reached him so I could speak, and he tilted his head just enough to catch my eyes and smirked. Which of course short circuited my brain (moreso when he curled his fingers around my hand for a split second - I know it was only a few seconds but I felt like I held up the line for ages 😂) - I was a stupid grinny fool then with Yoojung, who - imo - looked slightly amused. Either he saw how Rie was affecting me or he was just was in a silly mood idk.

Concert

Then we had the concert - amazing experience overall. Honestly did not last long enough. I won't go into all the specific songs because this is already absolutely monstrously long, so I'll just hit the important parts.

I had a pretty good idea they'd do begin and because based on the previous stops, but I wasn't sure; I was praying for it tho, esp after those first two interactions with Rie. because was the song that ultimately made me give the O's a serious shot. So when they did it, I was so jazzed. because makes me cry, it's such a beautiful song and the choreography they made for it is stunning. (I love all 6 choreos - they are so smart in the way they used the members in couples to add to the effect, and the way they used the choreography to sort of tell the story that they told in the ui videos - it's so impressive.)

So, as pretty much everyone knows, after that was the proposal - I was a sobbing mess and it was beautiful. Honestly - I feel so proud of OOO for creating a space safe enough for this, and I am so happy for the folks that got engaged, what a powerful and amazing moment. Obviously I was just one face in the crowd, but I'm so honored that I got to watch history be made in a way, it's beautiful and humbling. No matter how much progress is made, this particular concert will always be the first that a queer couple not only got engaged at, but had the full support and cheer of the group - I mean - Kyubin excitedly and willingly stopping the concert to do this? What a powerful statement of support. I doubt they'll ever see this, but I wish the couple all the happiness in the world, and I woud love to thank them for letting all of us there share in such a beautiful moment.

Oh, by the way, the progress flag that ultimately made it on stage was actually my friend's flag. The group I ended up getting in with before the concert decided we wanted to sign one. We had him bring it and we all signed it before going into the venue (more than just us - he was having a bunch of people sign - anyone who wanted to in the line - it was so full of signatures of support); and one of our gc members handed it to them, the way I cheered when I saw them grabbing it. I could talk for pages about what OOO's support means for the community and how important it is, but I am sure this is already becoming tedious lol - so I will save that for another day.

Snapshots (Premium)

Junji

So after the concert was over too soon - I got Junji and Rie for premium snapshots. I decided to go to Junji first. When I got up there, the staff was changing the film, but I was scared to approach bc I didn't wanna get yelled at by her. Junji was leaning against the barricade, so we just kind of awkwardly stared into each other's eyes for an uncomfortable amount of time before he did that all caps HELLO bellow he'd been doing all night. Which startled the fuck out of me 😑 -- I asked for a back to back photo, he stood straight up and laughed (I think pointing out our height difference, even with the height boost from my boots I am tiny comparatively). He is massive. Jfc - I've met a lot of tall people, taller than him even, but he seems to just dwarf them all. I didn't really notice his size at the fansign/hi touch as much - probably bc it went so fast.

So we turn and he nearly crushed me bc he dropped his weight on my back. I figured he'd stay standing tall but, just kinda touching, but no, he decided to see just how much my tiny ass could support 🙃 - I had a moment of real fear - I was already weak in the legs from the concert (and standing for the 5 hours prior to said concert), if I went down he was gonna come with me and we'd both end up hurt 🤣 but we stayed standing. I thanked him and rushed off to Rie's line.

Rie

Thus comes embarrassing Rie moment #3 of my night. Once again the lady had to change the film, so the awkward staring ensued. Rie is a lot more forward then Junji tho, so once he realized I wasn't moving voluntarily, he stepped up and motioned for me to join him at the barricade. He asked how I liked the concert and I said he did amazing. I told him I wanted to poke his cheek. We couldn't quite get the hand position right so I hit his hand once or twice lol. After the photo was taken I (looked into his eyes again - that was my mistake) told him he performed because beautifully. He grinned all wide and said "oh thank you!" and touched my hand. I got so shy that I nodded and hurried off - I was nearly running. He grabbed at me and was like “no no no no!” - it was because I ran off without my photo. 🫣 So I had to come back and take it from the staff member and tried to walk away but he called for me again and raised his hand, I figured for a high five, but he squeezed it a second and grinned before letting me slink away in shame.

Snapshots (Standard)

Then I had standard photos - I got one with Kyubin, Nine, Mill, Rie, and Junji. I wanted one with Yoojung but unfortunately his sold out before I could buy it 😩

Nine

I went to Nine first figuring he'd be not so bad, and I was right. He's very easy to be around. I told him he was amazing and he laughed and thanked me, and said I was more amazing. Honestly his interaction was by far the least star-struck that I had and I'm glad for it, it really solidified him as a great, easygoing person for me, and it was really nice to have that. Before I got to him, the person ahead of me spoke Korean, it was really cute bc he wasn't expecting it. He thanked her in English and she spoke back in Korean, his eyes bulged out of his head and he laughed so bright and chatted with her for a few seconds, it was really cute. Prior to the concert I was pretty sure he was my bias wrecker, and I definitely stand by that belief now, there's something just so nice about him. Not in a "comfort person" way but more of like... I don't know how to describe it tbh, he is just so naturally friendly.

Mill & Kyubin

Mill was so sweet and gentle. He pulled me so much closer than I thought he would - I was scared to touch him 😂 but when he tugged me close I was like oh, okay, this is fine. And he held on for a bit after and thanked me for coming, I thanked him and said he did so well. The woman doing his photos (she's known as a problematic person and really not very nice) was rushing a bit - I wish I could've talked with him for a minute more - he was very similar to Nine in the whole just, easy to talk to, normal person, not intimidating way. After I finished with him and was waiting for another member, I saw him interacting with a child fan that came. She was no more than 8 or 9, maybe younger. He was so sweet, it warmed my heart. He was like, fixing her hair and talking gently to her, honestly - kids and animals, THE prime indicator of a person. (Apparently Rie was very sweet to the kids too but I missed seeing that. Good thing, probably, I was already lost for that man).

Kyubin's was hard to read. He wasn't cold or mean, but he's very professional and kind. He is so frickin' tall. I told him he did so well tonight and thanked him for all his hard work, I wanted to say more to him, but my brain was blanking and I was so tired >.< - I know he's a chatty person if you start it, I've heard as much from other lyOns; my friend had a fun story with him. If I have any regrets at all from this concert, it's not finding a way to get a picture with Yoojung, and not chatting for longer with Kyubin and Mill. Next time I see OOO I'm definitely gonna try - they're all so great and I want to get that chance.

Junji (Again)

So then... Junji and Rie. I was nervous about going up to them again, but I don't know why. It wasn't like I was the only person that had multiple photos. I was still so embarrassed about running away from Rie before though, so I went to Junji first. He did that big crooked grin and stood upright when he saw me - it's such a cute expression and ngl it immediately made me less nervous. Despite his size, he exudes gentleness (even when he's nearly crushing you lol) and it's really comforting. The lady was changing the film (again! What luck) but this time I went up to him and said "I'm back again!" Unfortunately that was the same time he chose to say "Long time no see!" -- Which made us both laugh. I repeated what he said, but he repeated what I had said - I'm proud to say I shared a braincell with one of my biases for a second there, and it made him do that fucking adorable nose crinkle and smile again.

So we did our pose and I knew I wasn't going to walk away without saying something, this was my last chance, so I tried to speak - but he leaned really close to me (I'm not that short man, you don't have to bend down to hear me 😭). When he did, my brain short circuited - he is so fucking cute and I forgot how to speak English. For a good five seconds I was just stuttering "I--- will--" - but he just waited so patiently for me to stop being an idiot. Finally I managed to get my tongue to work and told him I'd see him again soon. Which isn't exactly what I wanted to say, but it was close enough. He leaned up and nodded and grinned and said "Yes we will!" and then he raised his fist for an exploding fist bump.

Rie (Again)

And thus left Rie. So I get up there and he grins and says "hi again" I mumbled what I hope sounded like hi. I forgot what the pose number was, so I just made the motion and he nodded and wrapped his arm around me really tight going "ah! yes". He had such a grip around my shoulders, I almost forgot to reach up and cup his chin lol. Other lyOns have mentioned that he really pulls you in, and they weren't kidding. I ended up wrapping my arm around his waist; he's so warm and soft, and he smells so amazing. Obviously, he's just, you know, a guy, but it was so relaxing for that moment - I would have gladly paid (more) money to just let him hug me for longer, he's got such a comforting touch.

He didn't immediately let go after the photo was taken (probably so I wouldn't run away from him again lol), instead he kept his arm around me and let me kind of step out of it. He raised one hand and I pressed palm to his; he wrapped his fingers around my hand and held me there, so I set my other hand on his bicep and finally met his gaze without panicking (go me!) - His gaze is so intense. I know I said that before, but it really is shocking. He gives his full attention to you and really focuses on what you're saying - it's really overwhelming, like you're the only person in the room with him, a friend, and not just a random person he met 10 seconds before. I told him that 'because' was the reason I ended up getting into OnlyOneOf and thanked him for it again. He grinned and bowed his head and thanked me, said I was too nice. He told me to have a nice night when I went to grab my photo, and I said "you do too"; he reached out one more time and squeezed my hand like he had been before and grinned before I walked off. That was the perfect end to the snapshots tbh.

Final Thoughts

And that was that - that was the whole experience, pretty much. Easily the best experience I've ever had relating to idols, concerts, or meeting celebrities in general. There's something special about these guys, the way they interact with fans, their overall vibe, idk. I didn't expect to get as overwhelmed by Rie as I did; up until that night my bias line was Junji and then Rie. That's really flipped - Rie is 100% the main bias, and to be entirely honest he's really fighting for Ult Bias spot and I think he's gonna take it. (Frankly the group is fighting for Ult Group and.. They are winning). Obviously it's an unfair advantage; I've never met my other idols aside from hi-touch, and it was really their interactions with me one on one that pushed them higher. They are amazing performers and do have a great stage charisma, but their ability to interact so easily and intimately with fans of all kinds was really what has shoved them a full head and shoulders above others.

Personally, I was anxious about meeting them. I know I'm not a stereotypical kpop fan. Obviously fans are diverse, but we have to admit, the majority is not made up of scruffy male presenting people. But this concert was so much more diverse than others I've been to, which was so great to see. And there was no difference in how they treated me versus how they treated their female presenting fans, their androgynous or enby fans, their clean shaven, younger male presenting fans, etc. That was so important to me. Being able to be comfortable as myself, not only with the friends I'd made but also with the group; not worrying about being perceived negatively; not sensing discomfort from any of them (real or imagined) - it meant the world to me, and I've genuinely never felt that welcome in a space like this before.

So that's that - this was a super long post, I'm sorry about that. While I was writing it, it let me go back and relive parts of it, realize things that I had overlooked before, etc. I hope it didn't bore anyone reading it to absolute tears. And I hope it encourages some of y'all to go see OOO if you have the chance. They are really amazing performers and guys, and I cannot wait to see them again.

[wistfulrat]

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[ for my fellow fledgling drarry stans! the drama list is here and, well. like i didn’t initially intend to go off in the mini-reviews beneath every rec but it’s just that you can't nOT yell about drarry as classic literary foils!! also it’s my dumb sideblog so i decided there are no rules and i get to be annoying about good writing.

but rly, the whole premise of the drarry pairing is shaped by this genre and if the ~serious world of serious published writers~ weren’t absolute cowards, they would admit that drama fic authors have contributed more to the genre than the average shit you can find at your local chain bookstore. so that's that on thAT. & if you love a fic here, don't forget to follow the authors, leave kudos & comments on their work, send them nice msgs bc they do all this shit for free xoxo ]

part 2: dramas

mood: for when I need emotional catharsis and maybe 7 hours to sob/brood about loneliness, the cost of love, & the perpetual fear of being truly known

includes: angst, hurt/comfort, reconciliation fics. it’s cruelty o’clock folks and someone is about to say/do something Fucked Up that they can’t take back. but don’t worry!! there will be a Reckoning feat. hamlet-worthy monologues, ugly truths, unbridled rage, trauma, insecurity, and just a fuck ton of tears!! but maybe even tender apologies and mended things.

(Un)wanted by @aibidil​ - 36k - E | Ginny's pregnant, then she's not and Harry's single. Harry, again with no family, doesn't know what to do with this turn of events, or how to find a new life—post-war, post-Ginny, post-abortion—in which he belongs. He doesn't expect that life to include dancing to the Backstreet Boys with Hermione and Draco Malfoy. A story of finding belonging in the unexpected. | --- can a fic be tender and unflinching at the same time? bc this story strikes that balance rly well and for a piece about unwantedness, it is incredibly humanizing. ginny holding her own, draco being gentle but not letting harry play victim, hermione calling harry “hazzah” and just the way this friendship insists on the validity of found families even when harry is spiraling?? and you’re forced to consider that no one has the monopoly on fucked-upness and that doesn’t absolve us of the ways we hurt each other but it means that everyone has the same potential to be better after being broken. goD JUST READ IT, OKAY.

Blood Magic, the series by @houseofhebrideanblacks and @thestralsofspinnersend 335k - E “Later that night. . .Draco wondered at the depths of magic, its breadth and scope. The ways in which life pervades and eludes death, the ways in which they endure all manners of small and large deaths within their lives.” -- if you don't read any other fic on this list, i hope you read this series bc holy shit it’s breathtaking. harry’s a recovering addict, draco’s recovering from abuse, and in a cottage within the forbidden forest begins an unlikely partnership as the boys take up the tedious work of healing. there are thestrals and everyone's in therapy. there are whole chapters of cottagecore drarry. it's a beautiful exploration of how we bare the immensity of loss against the miracles of birth and regrowth. 

Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia - 18k - T “A ship in a full sail, a ship in a state of decay, a ship that had been rebuilt, slightly different. A repeating cycle. “What makes the ship the same?” asked Harry. “I don’t know. There must be something in it that lasts across the changes.” -- DO YOU KNOW HOW THIS QUOTE LIVES RENT FREE IN MY SAD, SAD BRAIN. DO YOU KNOW HOW I LOSE SLEEP THINKING ABOUT THE FUCKING SHIP OF THESEUS. it’s a memory loss fic and everything is so unFAIR. you want to murder harry sometimes bc he’s such a shiT and you suffer through the ways he questions desire, penance, redemption, true love. and by the end, you want to believe in those golden slumber lyrics: “once, there was a way to get back home” 

Yours to Keep by @dracoismytrashson​ - 135k - E i love the university setting, i love getting to see harry and draco’s first forays into a real LGBTQ community, the class and race structures outside of the wizarding world. i love that this is the context in which they’re allowed to confront the shittiness of PTSD, anxiety, depression etc. as they come together and fall apart against each other’s traumas. it makes the ending feel earned af. “Baby, we’ve been easing into it for a decade.” -- my god this line

Away Childish Things by @letteredlettered​ - 153k - T  this fic is devastating. like, completely forget whatever reticence you might have towards a de-aging fic and read this. the de-aging premise allows the author to cut through the ways harry and draco hold each other at a distance and you end up with these stunning moments of clarity where they’re truly seeing each other for the first time. and suddenly everything makes sense. i won't spoil it here but there’s a scene towards the end where harry is talking to hermione and ron about realizing the first time he felt what its like to be loved and I fucking SOBBED. an all-time fave fic about learning how to belong.

Had To Be You by @lettersbyelise​​ - 59k - E a genuinely excellent slow burn about absolute fucking morons who refuse to express their mutual love over the course of literal years?? HOW MANY TENDER MEET-CUTES DO 2 GAY IDIOTS EVEN NEED. a car ride a bookshop a street corner -- when harry met sally is my enemy. but you know what? this fic is masterfully written, it’s an epic tale of unexpected friendships and the inability to say the things we feel. also its very much also a soft boi fic if not for the Major Fuck Up that pushes it into drama territory for me. so worth the turmoil tbh.

Hurricane by phrynne - 120k - E auror partners terrified of love. it’s a fic about walls - where the emotional landscape of this fic is occluded by dishonest words so you feel the tension play out in hollow voices, shuttered looks, emptied eyes. it’s like watching two ppl get flayed alive in slow motion and everything is SHIT for a little. it’s mean, it’s ugly, it doesn’t let you give the characters an out when they’re being cruel - to each other and to themselves. but harry and draco are two violent forces hurling toward each other’s walls and the inevitable reckoning comes and it’s so very worth the ending. the hospital bed scene to rule all hospital bed scenes.

Returning Tides by @zigster-ao3​ - E  “Is my timing that flawed? Our respect run so dry? Yet there's still this appeal That we've kept through our lives” --those fuCKing ian curtis lyrics in the summary!! p a i n. why do i put myself through getting-back-together fics knowing full well i’m gonna be Sad As Hell during the not-together portion of the story?? we are all unfortunately hoes for heartache. anyway this fic is beautiful. draco’s a dad and recently widowed, harry has a thestral reserve, the settings here are stunning. a story about grief and love that lingers.

A Piercing Comfort by @talithan - 44k - T “There is no objective scorecard. There isn’t anything that a person does that tips the balance from ‘deserving’ to ‘undeserving’, or vice versa. A ‘deserving’ person will not run out of worthiness after a set time of happiness and have to then go about working to deserve it again. And an ‘undeserving’ person does not have to suffer at length before having the opportunity to be ‘deserving’.” -- the heart of this fic. harry’s in therapy, facing depression, and learning how to accept love he doesn’t think he deserves. (also draco is harry’s therapist but yes, that power dynamic is handled ethically-well imo and addressed in the author notes I promise!!).

Borrowing Courage by @xx-thedarklord-xx​ - 70k - E |After years of being a Magical Artist and painting for other people, Draco decides it’s time to paint for himself for once. The secrets pile up as he tries to unravel the mystery of his relatives but the only thing he didn’t count on was having to go to Potter of all people for approval.| --god i love this fic. the thing about drarry here is that they never mean to hurt each other but they do. they do and draco’s trying to do the right thing and he wants so badly for good family but harry’s never rly stopped grieving sirius and it’s this whole unintended mess of festering wounds forced to heal. everyone needs a hug. also ron/blaise pairing and ron+draco’s friendship here is everything!!

Reparations and the sequel, Foundations by Saras_Girl - 320k - E | Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places.| -- incredible. harry and draco’s dynamic as healers, the cast of original characters, the boys learning what it means to trust each other, draco building a rehabilitation center, harry falling in love with him, and “meus fabula est mei ut dico: my story is mine to tell.”  i cry

The Ties that Bind by phoenix_writing (not on ao3) - 61k - T | Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same.| -- harry’s got major abandonment issues and he’s just trying to be a good co-parent with draco but everyone is being the woRST and you want to murder them on behalf of harry. but then, the boys learn to listen to each other and god it all becomes so tender. also harry has a gay panic. things are awful but it all works out. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Ok so I've been stalking your blog for the past couple of hrs after seeing your TadaAi posts (I'm drowning in the period drama that is this ship) and I find you ship Tododeku and rinharu (god i can't stand bakudeku and makoharu) and seems like we share a lot of our views on fandom and ships probably because we're older (I'm 22). Followed and looking forward to your input in the future!

Also you might've given me the motivation to finish watching Free! XD

Hehe yay, please, we need more ppl in our “house of oldies”, make yourself at home lol. And we share a lot of ships?! Even better <3

I knooow, I can’t believe we’ve got a gay “master who fell in love with his servant” ship in the anime, just what I needed for my idiotic collection lmao

But also these two have too much going on between them, so much wasted potential in my opinion, it’d be so interesting to explore (but sadly no xD), they were still the only interesting thing for me lolz. I love complicated morons, who became the victims of a huge unrequited requited love misunderstanding, bc they’re insecure morons lmao and they just have 2 of my fav ships vibes, so it’s probably mostly this haha. 

Oh, I’m inputting *wink wink*, can’t wait to finish the vid, I’m having too much fun with it. I’ve just literally spent several minutes trying to get whether I’ve put Tadashi’s sexy mole in the right distance from his eye in the “him moaning on the table” manip lolz. What can I say... I picked the best hobby, with all the support I’m getting with my vids, I’m living a dream xD

You know, I think I’ve said it before, but when it comes to bakudeku, I at least understand what ppl hope to see there and why, but like.. it’s just not happenning. Also imagining Bakugou lovingly hugging Midoriya is just so OOC I start laughing all the time. And whatever ppl say, in any ship whether they’re enemies or rivals or anything, if you can’t imagine them being tender with each other, smth is not right in my opinion. Also once again, who needs idiotic bleating Midoriya, idk. I’m just tired of the endless “die, deku/out of my way” yelling, I like watching Bakugou going to parties and amusement parks and doing silly stuff, too. Like I’ve said before, pride won’t ever let him change the way he behaves with Midoriya, even when they’re doing “great”. If he was the one, it wouldn’t have mattered, no matter how tough you are, and it wouldn’t take that long. I also don’t think they’re that kind of relationship, like they move each other for sure, sometimes, yeah (not always in a good way tho), but be together in a relationships? Can’t imagine that. Like not all rivals have the rivals to lovers dynamic, no matter what ppl say. But I get the shipping, bc 1stly these two are playing too huge of a role in each other’s lives, 2ndly Midoriya is obsessed with him and Bakugou obsessed with him too (just in a bad way lmao) and 3rd ppl want that “enemies to lovers” dynamic, since many love it (me included, when it done right and progresses right), so they’re trying to write that “to lovers” bridge, that just doesn’t fit here in my opinion, simply bc Bakugou won’t be soft with Midoriya, like ever in a way, you’d want, and I don’t think it’s possible for them to go there.

Tododeku on the other hand, 1stly they also play too huge of a role in each other’s lives, 2ndly Midoriya is obsessed with him too and Todoroki is lovingly obsessed with him in return, 3rdly they are also rivals to lovers, and I have no problem imagining the second part, it won’t be OOC, 4thly Midoriya when he’s with Todoroki is my fav Midoriya, he’s happy, he is cocooned and he’s badass af (and like when he told Endeavor to fuck off or yelled at Todoroki “the fuck are u doing?” xD are still the best), 5thly Midoriya forgets about Bakugou, when he’s with Todoroki a lot and it’s just funny to me, 6thly they healed each other so nicely, I can’t not be into that, 7thly when they’re together I have like 0 worries, idk I’m like “he will catch him” anyways haha, Bakudeku just don’t give me this vibe. It’s like yeah, they won’t let each other die, but it’s always this chaos of “out of my way”, “I don’t want your help” and “let me punch you before I punch the villain” that I’m just “oh for god’s sake, pls bring in Kirishima and Todoroki so we could just go home, it could’ve been solved in 2 minutes” lmao. Etc, etc.

Tododeku just have too many winning points over bakudeku for me, same with kiribaku over bakudeku, even tho I 100% get bakudeku as a ship ofc. Also idk whether things would be different if Todoroki wouldn’t exist in the equation, but the moment I saw that s2 scene where Bakugou started yelling and Todoroki just ignored him and was like “was Midoriya always this good?”, there was no going back to me XD. Like they both obviously see that Midoriya is wonderful, but only one reacted to that in a way that I wanted. And I’m a sucker for the ships who don’t give a fuck and like “yeah, I find him amazing and everyone should know that”. Todoroki is also one of those guys, who if you give them the much needed love, they’ll return it tenfold with a forever devotion. And all of my fav ships are like that: Yullen, Rinharu, Mikayuu, Wangxian, Akakuro, etc. They’re like “well, I ain’t an idiot to let someone this precious go”, you know lol

On the other hand, when it comes to Kirishima, Bakugou can do all kind of ridiculous thing I wouldn’t imagine he would do to keep him or make him happy, you know. Kirishima is also the only one, who can put his arm around Bakugou without it being cut off, so I don’t make the rules here lol.

So it’s not like I can’t stand bakudeku, more of like can’t imagine this work, to me it’s easier to imagine todobaku in a relationships, but not bakudeku lolz.

But when it comes to makoharu, I just have a huge problem with it and I will never get it. Bc they don’t bring anything good in each other like AT ALL, I don’t even understand what kind of relationships this is from their shipper point of view; they give each other nothing, and one of them is totally in love with someone else and wants a future with him. And that someone also head over heals with him and also wants a future with him. And I hate how 99,9 % of mh fans don’t give a fuck about Haru or Rin whatsoever and just ignore their character’s everything. Bc Makoto. I’m also like if you love him so much, the fuck would you want him to be with Haru anyways, dude doesn’t reciprocate, like at all. I’m at confusion, like name good points of this ship and what good can they do for each other characteristically. There is none, it’s like a damn swamp. Like usually I can give my notp some points, but this is like... they’re both no good for each other... like... why would anyone even want this idk. Don’t tell me “for the childhood friends” one-sided dynamic, like why won’t you also ship Shion with Safu then, like even he seemed more invested in that, than Haru in makoharu lol.

Even if you think of them from the point of view of “the two who are always walking together” ships, that are everywhere nowdays (even tho since Haru moved to Tokyo, he was always with Asahi instead), but even if... those kind of ships are usually at least make each happy and are enough for each other. Haru on the other hand, when he doesn’t have Rin, he is walking with Makoto like a ghost, not even caring if he’s talking next to him AND he’s getting ennoyed by him. Like explain, how someone’s shipping them romantically. It’s been showed like 20 times, that with Rin, but without Makoto, he can be perfectly happy, without Rin tho, he never is.

Also someone explain, what exactly is the point of splitting up two characters, who are happy together, make each other the best versions of themselves and want to be together whole-heartedly? Like I know many start shipping smth, bc the relationships are better in the other pairing, for example, but this is like... definitely not the case here. Like what exactly is missing in rinharu, that makoharu has? Lack of progression and mutual inspiration?

So yes, if you’re into rinharu, totally finish Free! They’re like doing sooo incredible and holy shit they’re inspiring, I mean, look, they’re now the tokyo olympics ambassadors, like how many of yall gay ships reached that? you can’t miss out on them, and also they’re so hilariously romantic, they literally made a wish to swim with each other since they were 13 and did everything to get each other there, I’m.. you’re lying, if you didn’t cry watching them as chibies making wishes on a star and watching them now. One of the most wonderful development in my opinion. Like who would’ve thought back in s1, that we’ll get Haru yelling on top of Rin about how he made him want a future with him, def not me lmao and now all the olympics boyfriends fanfiction are true, I mean, idk what to say anymore. I miss them so much, I can’t wait for the movie :D