#and i dont know how to disagree without fear or crying anyway. its not worth the uncertainty

[shapeshifting-arch-mage]

9/23/2018, Part 1

We are now running through the forest, huffing and puffing, trying to catch up to Baku.

"Temmie... why are we-"

"i gota get to Baku! i gota get to Baku!"

"But wh-"

"i gota tell him wy i havent ben goin to hapy fun raevtime!1!"

Against my wishes, we continue to run toward the oasis.

[Baku] After leaving the haunted house Baku found himself wandering toward the oasis, he had heard about this place in the past and wanted to check it out himself. It was much warmer here and quiet. "Well that was an adventure."

[Sirius] Sirius would soon pop out of the ground, attempting to shake off the frost on his petals. “Yeah...” He would start thinking about what just happened, and spaced out due to it, deep thoughts. Why didn’t he get fear? He has seen far worse though, mostly monsters beating each other, yet he felt no fear from that either, and only recently he figured out he could dislike or like something... was that technically fear? Over the fact he disliked so much of his home and the haunted house? Right, Baku mentioned not being able to feel much either, should he open up? Hell if he knew, something told him that he shouldn’t, but he didn’t honestly care either way, maybe he should... but not right now he’s in hecking space-

[Baku] Baku chuckled. "Yer a serious space case ya know, what's on yer mind anyway?"

[Rave Witch Temmie] pant... pant... pant... We just make it to the oasis before our legs give out and we collapse. We lay face-down on the ground, panting hard.

[Sirius] Upon hearing Baku’s voice, he fell out of space and looked at them, deciding to tell them the truth, as he felt that would be something he would do. “Oh... uh... I happen to not feel much either... I mostly think on why I don’t feel anything.. other than likes and dislikes...” He wasn’t sure if the other would believe him, but it was possible, all the other Floweys he met could feel some things, but him? No he wasn’t like them...

[Rave Witch Temmie] pant... pant... pant... We weakly lift our head and pick up our hat, which fell off when we landed on the ground.

[Baku] Baku chuckled. "Yer different than most o' yer kind aren't ya?" At that Baku sat down next to the flower and grinned. "Fer my kind not having emotions is normal, we're born wit out 'em."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "...huh??" Temmie is curious. We prop ourself up on our belly and listen in on the conversation.

[Sirius] “Yeah... I’m pretty different... I heard the others don’t feel love and compassion...” He would blink, looking at Baku again. “So you’re pretending too?” Now he has found a lead, maybe his condition has something to do with this skeleton... and their kind... although he didn’t know what Baku meant by... their kind... was there another type of skeleton? He thinks, trying to prevent himself from spacing out, but doing that was difficult for him, he had nothing else to focus on after all.

[Baku] Baku laughed. "Yes, in a sense. I mean we can learn emotions by watchin' others or learnin' about 'em as we go through life. Then again most o' us aren't liked much so few o' us live long."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "b-but i liek u!1!"

"Temmie!" I think, "Don't interrupt! They're having a private conversa-"

"i liek yu a lot!1!! ur my fav dj!!1!"

[Sirius] Sirius was about to say something, but then he heard Temmie speak up, he would look over, possibly staring into their soul on accident, then he spoke up. “Lucky... I have watched others too, and I still feel nothing.” He would just continue the conversation as normal, because he couldn’t care less about Temmie being there. More like he didn’t mind, it was only one other person... not like a lot of people were listening in.

[Baku] Baku looked over when he heard the familiar voice of Temmie and chuckled. "Appreciate dat chica, but others don't share yer opinion." With that said he turned his attention back to the flower. "I ain't lucky, I still don't fully understand emotions myself but in all honesty I don't really wanna, they seem like more o' a hassle than an asset if ya ask me."

[Rave Witch Temmie] Others don't share her opinion? The heck's he talking about? At least, that's what Temmie's thinking. I know exactly what he means by that, but all Temmie can do is cry out in confusion, "w-w-w-waaaaa???"

We try to stand up, but just end up falling back on our belly again. "oof!"

We pant a few more times, and then say, "wh-wh-who dont like u?? wy som1 dont like u?? ur da best dj!1!" Wait, I can answer that question for her. In our minds, I replay the memory of my first meeting with Baku...

"...oh ya, her..." She still doesn't understand what there is not to like about Baku, though. "but wy peeps dun like u??"

[Sirius] “Feeling nothing isn’t the best way to go... that’s how I feel anyway, you can’t make friends all that well, and the people you should care about the most... they end up leaving you at some point, or constantly worry over you until you end up pretending that you care, it’s... so empty.  I dislike it.” Sirius would look at the water, sighing. “It’s like... hell? I guess...? It’s... hard to explain...”

[Baku] "I disagree, I've seen what havin' emotions can do ta a person an' I hate it." At that his aura seemed to darken a little. "Emotions only hurt ya in the long run so they're funking pointless, at least without 'em I can live freely doin' my own thing, never havin' ta hurt because someone else decided I wasn't worth their time."

[Rave Witch Temmie] We finally manage to pick ourselves up from the ground. We start to waddle closer to Baku...

"Baku, wat u talkin about? wat u mean u dont liek feelins??"

"Temmie, please, don't..."

"i liek feelins! dey feel gud! u make me feel gud! u da best! an-" I finally manage to take control of our mouth for a second and get my own words in.

"nnnnNNNO!1! hes NOT da best!1!! hes NOT nice!!1"

"...awawawa?? hooman?!? i tot u likd him to!!1"

[Sirius] “...there’s a contradiction in that second sentence. When you cant feel emotions, there is no happiness, there’s nothing, I know that first hand, having been there as an Asriel, watching my family, they looked so happy, and I was never happy with them. It... makes you not want to live, I don’t even know why I’m still here. Because it’s pointless. I tried so hard to feel something, anything, and all I have found is that I can like, dislike, and want something. That’s it.” The more Sirius talked, the more dead he sounded, his eyes were empty voids, he was surely showing a point. “Even if feeling something can hurt others, it’s worse feeling absolutely nothing. Because you can’t care about the people you want to care about, you can’t ever be happy.” God this got dark fast.

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i didnt say i didnt like him! i sed hes not nice!"

"but he gav me pretty glow necklas!1!"

"yea, but just cuz hes nice to you doesnt mean hes nice to every1!"

"wy not?"

"cuz hes bad at it!"

"wat yu mean?"

"hes just nice to you cuz you... you..."

...How do I put this without hurting her feelings? I want to tell her that, the reason Baku was nice to her was because she's such a kiss-up, but that wouldn't be a nice thing to say... and the last thing I want to do is sound like a jerk to Temmie. I'm not a jerk, rather, the one we're talking about is the jerk...

[Baku] Baku chuckled darkly. "That is where our opinions differ my man. I live freely an' do what I want, there's no void in my life, just fun." At that he grinned and looked to the sky. "I get ta party an' have a blast without a care in the world."

[Rave Witch Temmie] I decide to just drop the issue. Hearing Baku mention partying reminds Temmie of why she wanted to follow him here in the first place. We walk over to Baku's side. "hey Baku, uhhhh..."

[Sirius] “Well... you can feel joy... it seems. So you only want to feel joy? Happiness? That’s different compared to nothing...” Sirius wouldn’t press more on the issue after this, in fact, he didn’t want to for once. Ooooh another lead! Back into space he goes.

[Baku] "Eh maybe, don't really know don't really care, I like things as they are." At that Baku laid down on the ground, watching the sky. "I live my life as a DJ an' I'm fine wit dat."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "Temmie, I think he's busy-" 

"hey Baku, uhhh... im sorry i couldnt go to ur raves, cuz ive been livin wit hooman, and she doesnt kno were ur raves are, so we couldnt go..."

We press our paws together anxiously. "ive been wantin to go but i couldnt cuz of hooman... im sorry..."

[Sirius] Sirius would stay silent, now he listens in, he didn’t know what else to say on this matter, other than an “ok” or “mhm” god conversation is hard.

[Baku] Baku grinned at the Temmie. "Hey no worries chica, ya don't have ta show up at every single one, just try to make it ta the ones ya can."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i-i wannaaaaa..." We frown. "but human is- mmmmf!" There I go slapping our paw over our mouth again. But this time, Temmie manages to remove it and continue speaking.

"i wana take human to ur rave!1! i told her shes gota go somtime!1 its da best rave evr!11 but shes scar-mmf!" And back over our mouth the paw goes...

...but only for a second. "hooman, wy yu keep doin dat?"

[Baku] Baku smirked. "I know exactly why she's doin' it, she doesn't want me ta find out who she is even though I already know exactly who she is, ain't dat right Cookie."

[Rave Witch Temmie] Upon hearing that last word...

...

...We freeze.

All we- or I- can do, is s t a r e, wide-eyed, mouth agape, like we've just seen a ghost. But, if I'm being honest, seeing a ghost wouldn't have been nearly as scary as what I just heard Baku say right now.

H o w d i d h e f i n d o u t ? ?

[Baku] Baku laughed. "Did ya really think I wouldn't notice, actions speak louder than words ya know. The constant stopping of Temmie every time it was even remotely possible she could give ya away was a red flag sweetheart, I'm no fool."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "h-h-hooman...???" Temmie thinks, my fear rubbing off onto her, "h-how does Baku no about... cookys??"

"THAT'S WHAT I'D LIKE TO- wait, cookies??"

"ya, cooky poshin!1! remembr?? were gona make cooky poshin!1!"

...The cookie potion. That's right... I had completely forgotten about that. Temmie must have mistakenly thought that Baku was referring to the magic cookie potion we still haven't made, and not to... well, me...

...Which gives me an idea. In a last-ditch effort to save face, we ask,

"...w-w-w-what cookies?? i dont got any cookies..."

[Baku] Baku grinned. "Really you're gonna try an' pull dat shiz wit me, what part o' I'm no fool do ya not get hm? I know it's you sweetheart stop tryin' ta hide."

[Rave Witch Temmie] "i dont got no cookys1!1"

At this point, this is kind of both of us saying this. I never actually told Temmie that I call myself Cookie, since I never felt the need to (and also to prevent her from spilling the beans to Baku about it). So, she still doesn't realize that Baku is talking about me, and not the magic potion we've been wanting to make. I, meanwhile, am just denying that I'm Cookie. Because I never told Baku that I call myself that. And yet he still found out.

[Baku] "Eh whatever suit yourself sweetheart, but trust me yer not very good at hidin'." At that Baku stood up and stretched. He then turned to the flower who was sitting there spacing out once more. "Well anyway I'm gonna go walk around, follow if ya want my petaled bro but otherwise I'm ditchin' this place." At that he turned to leave the oasis.

[Rave Witch Temmie] Normally, Temmie would have wasted no time following Baku wherever he was headed, but right now, we are in too much shock to do anything but stand there, like a deer in the headlights.

"hooman... howd Baku no about cookys??"

"He wasn't talking about cookies, Temmie. He was talking about me."

"waaa?? but ur not a cooky!1! ur a hooman!1!"

"Yes, I am. But... I like to call myself... Cookie..."

[Sirius] Sirius would have followed Baku, only because he wanted to leave as well, this was odd, not like he knew how this skeleton was... it was more like he was interested in how he worked, how he was able to be happy despite being born without them, that interested him the most, how was that possible?

[Rave Witch Temmie] "Soft Cookie. I call myself Soft Cookie. It's not my real name; it's actually the name of one of my shape-shifted forms... but I like the name. It has a nice ring to it. But how in the world... how did Baku find that out?!? I never told him... I made certain not to ever tell him. So how he found out... it makes absolutely no sense that he found out! Unless..."

"...ya?"

"...Someone else told him..."

Continuing to stand out here in the forest isn't going to do us any good, though. We should probably head back to the resort. We begin to make our way out of the forest.

...Slowly.

We walk through the forest, and back to the resort; our looming sense of dread never leaving us.