#and id have to buy a swimsuit jfc
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i had to leave some documents regarding pe in the uni office and it was in the same building as the swimming pool and the smell hit me so hard i felt like a kid again i miss swimming sm :((
#between the chlorine smell and the high temperature.. istg my heart started beating faster bc of adrenaline#eating disorders are truly the bilety things ever like my eating is fine now but i still hate how i look and the idea of wearing a swim sui#terrifies me#i used to swim 2-3 times a week before i went to middle school#and i took a break bc i had a busier schedule and was planning to go back the next year#and then the ed hit and i couldnt go back ://#i think i havent been to a pool for 5 years??#and the only times in middle school that ive been is bc my parents forced me to and i still feel like crying when i remember it afsfdghdhd#maybe i could start going like super early when nobodys there??#but i dont have time during the week so id have to go on weekend probably plus take the car#and id have to buy a swimsuit jfc#but yeah hopefully#i saw some girls playing volleyball but i couldnt fit it into my schedule and im still kind of pissed abt it tbh#sorry for venting :((#📓
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