#and realized something hilarious... brb rewatching a thing

[farminglesbian]

perry mason, 2x04

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

Continuing my dissertation on why Supernatural is about Destiel even when Cas is not in the episode, and here is my analysis of 11x18 - The Chitters.

I initially had this episode on a “never watching again” because the monster grossed me out so much, but then I realized that the writers were giving us a literal Dean/Cas as husbands mirror story by doing this

and hiding it in an episode with the most grotesque MOTW imaginable (seriously, name a worse monster than underground creatures who impregnate humans with their eggs via orgy and leave them in a damn cave; oh and cause them to shake, chitter, and have glowy green eyes.  BRB, puking).

A little trickster moment in the beginning starting this episode with two brothers, and the eldest - Matt - dying in a *shocker* supernatural way, and the youngest - Jesse - then going on to dedicate his life to avenging his brother’s death.  A lot of reviewers consider this intro to mean we are supposed to be looking for Sam/Dean parallels in the following narrative bEcAusE tHAt is WhAT thE boYS wOuLD dO, but I POSIT TO YOU IT IS NOT ONLY A 10000000 percent DESTIEL STORY, BUT ALSO THAT this is established in the very first scene - the conversation between Jesse and Matt in the flashback:

JESSE

It finally happened.

MATT

What? You didn’t get detention this week?

JESSE

Me and Jackie, we kissed.

MATT:

Okay, can I stop hearing about him every two minutes now? “You think he likes me?”, “Jackie looked at me. I-I think he looked at me.”

JESSE

He definitely likes me.

***I mean Matt’s comment -  does this not immediately remind you of Sam “I am in constant Destiel super hell” Winchester?

For reference, here is Sam’s “I am in super hell please stop now” face:

**Also he LOOKED AT HIM?! What is 80% of Destiel if not subtextual pining and LOOKING.  I don’t make the rules.  Jesse is Dean.  And Matt is dead.  Matt’s death ENDS the “brother portion” of this story insofar as the parallel is concerned. (**please note I am not advocating for Sam to die.  the parallel is just NOT about the brother storyline in this episode - there are plenty of other “mirrors” for the brother storyline, but this is NOT one of them).

We cut to the real Dean continuing in FULL RESEARCH MODE ACTIVATED because Amara has Cas at this point and he is panicking.  

Was the red and black flannel an intentional wardrobe choice to mirror Jesse’s jacket?  We will never know. (Yes.  Everything is intentional.  This is Supernatural. We hate it here. Also Cesar is in a KHAKI vest because KHAKI means THINGS in Supernatural for REASONS). 

Also I love FULL RESEARCH MODE ACTIVATED desperately trying to get Cas back Dean.  It’s real “I just started studying for my final the night before at 10 p.m.” energy.  He’s refusing to stop to even look at Sam here:

Anyway, a few gross scenes of green eyed people, orgies, and a hilarious conversation about weed (or was it oregano?- 

Jensen Ackles you slay me) later -

Jesse and Cesar save Dean’s bacon and the four of them end up in a bar chatting over beers.  Here is where it is INCREDIBLY apparent that Jesse is a mirror for Dean (also I’d watch a bottle episode of these four hanging out doing regular every day stuff a la How I Met Your Mother or Friends).  

JESSE

One of them took my brother 27 years ago.

[Sam and Dean look surprised. Sam turns to Dean, and Dean is speechless.

DEAN

[looks to Jesse] I’m sorry to hear that.

JESSE

I’ve been waiting years to come back and have this shot at them. So, I hope you understand, I’m gonna ask you two to take a step back from this one.

DEAN

[nods] Well, catch us up. Where have you guys been?

JESSE

In the woods, where the action is, looking for their burrow and saving your ass.

[Sam is slightly taken aback, but he gives a look of approval. Cesar scoffs.]

JESSE

What?

CESAR

Well, one of the reasons we’ve been holed up in the trees is because Jesse hates the town and everyone in it.

JESSE

Because they’re ignorant and useless. [turns to Cesar] They didn’t believe me 27 years ago, they’re not gonna start now.

CESAR

[sternly] It’s boneheaded not to be following leads in town.

JESSE

Hey, nobody stopping you from talking to the whole box of crackers.

[Cesar sighs and looks away.]

***You could replace “Jesse” with “Dean” and the lines wouldn’t need to change an iota to stay in the character.  Cesar’s scoffing, the stern response, calling Jesse boneheaded, sighing, looking away exasperatedly - 100% Cas energy.  I really don’t make the rules. Cesar isn’t anything like Sam, and he isn’t meant to be.  This is not a brother story.  THIS IS A STORY ABOUT TRUE LOVE DAMMIT.

Dean makes that red herring comment about them bickering just like brothers , then:

Which by the way is EXACTLY how Dean and Cas bicker.  Hence why Sam is always in super hell.  

I can’t find a better quality image of this montage, but I really wanted to bring attention to the EXPRESSION on Dean’s face:

***Sure, Dean. You’re curious about what it’s like to live with a hunter.  Okay. 

Also, whoever made this, you get it.

They start arguing on the next step - questioning a former sheriff, or going back to the woods to search for the creepy crawlies’ hidey hole.

JESSE

[sternly] We need to find the burrow.

CESAR

[patiently] Jess, we’ve been beating around the woods for two days.

JESSE

[stubbornly] That’s where they are. You saw the tracks.

CESAR

I can keep searching on my own. We’re losing.

****sternly-patiently-stubbornly <- it’s like a never-ending Destiel refrain.  Cesar’s willingness to continue on what is purely Jesse’s quest for revenge so Jesse can move on is also so very Cas-adjacent.  I LOVE A SUBTEXTUAL PARALLEL.

Anyway, then they split into twos, pairing Sam with Jesse and Cesar with Dean for the next few scenes.  Lots of reviewers tracked this as a brother-brother (i.e. Sam is paired with the version of himself and Dean is paired with the version of himself) parallel, but THIS scene with Sam, Jesse, and the old sheriff SCREAMS otherwise:

JESSE

[angrily pushed Cochran down the chair] You son of a bitch.

[Sam moves forward to get Jesse back.]

JESSE

You knew the whole time! You knew where they were when everybody was suffering.

COCHRAN

[pushes Jesse off him] I was suffering too!

SAM

[pulls Jesse away from Cochran and tries to calm him down] Jesse. Hey, hey. Hold on. Hold on.

***EXCUSE ME, did he just say DEAN’S CATCHPHRASE.  And how many times has Sam done this exact thing to Dean when he is in a rage?!?   I DO NOT MAKE THE RULES.  

ALSO something about THE JUXTAPOSITION of Cesar and Jesse in the following scene.  This is very Dean with Cas quietly waiting for him to me.

A lot of creepy monster montage scenes and dead bodies later, the day is saved.  Cue adorable husband exchange, and the news that Jesse and Cesar are going to retire.  

SAM

So, uh, what’s freedom look like?

JESSE

Nice little spread in New Mexico. We’ve been paying on it for years. Set foot on it about … twice?

CESAR

Gonna raise horses. And if that goes bust, Jesse used to be an EMT.

JESSE

Oh, so now I’m supporting your ass?

[Cesar chuckles and looks at Jesse lovingly, before both men turns to the Winchesters. Sam follows the laugh.]

CESAR

 It’s time to start living.

Also this SHOULDER touch.  And it’s the left shoulder.  (there is a great Casifer post out there about how Dean was thrown off specifically because Casifer touched his RIGHT shoulder, and Cas always touches his LEFT).  

All I really need now is a FACE CUP, tbh.  

You want more parallels?  Recall that CESAR (aka Cas-adjacent) is the one who saves Dean’s bacon in the beginning.  

Then he helps him get up off the ground. You know, as in he RAISES him from -

(JENSEN YOUR ACTING CHOICES WITH THAT LOOK ON YOUR FACE ILYSM)

Dean, realizing that he is watching an AU version of himself and his boyfriend/future husband:

Yes, hi, we are the same character.

Anyway, I will always and forever love this episode for showing us the ending Dean and Cas deserved (WHAT WAS THE REASONNNN) - settling down on a small ranch together in New Mexico.  At least these two got their happily ever after.

ALSO, MANIFESTING

Maybe then Sam can finally leave super hell.

BONUS:  

Sam: Couldn’t do it, huh?

Dean: [shakes head] No, didn’t feel right.

Sam: Yeah. I know what you mean. Two hunters who make it to the finish line?

Dean: Yeah, you leave that alone.

Saving this to my box of INCONSISTENCY TRASH DUMP FOR 15x20.

P.S. I am starting to develop a theory that the episodes we all like LEAST, and therefore tend to skip [or that have off putting plotlines/ don’t go with the general myth arc/creepy monsters/bizarre or even boring scenarios] are the ones with potentially the most subtext, and therefore the best underlying story line (so likely no Cas in the episode, random stuff like Red Meat, the creepy chitters monster that makes you want to cringe). 

So at the end of the day, the subtext was always the real story anyway.

(OMG I JUST REMEMBERED THAT THE GIRL WEREWOLF IN BLOODLINES WEARS A FUCKING KHAKI TRENCH COAT THE ENTIRE TIME.  AM I GOING TO HAVE TO REWATCH THE ALWAYS SKIPPABLE BLOODLINES NOW?  And that definitely means I am DOOMED to rewatch the worst episode that ever was when I get to season 15.  Dammit.  What have I done?!?!??!?!)

[cassarilladraws]

I'm doing it. I'm rewatching Chat Blanc. Here's a thread of me going through that again. 💔 (This was originally a twitter thread, but I’m posting it here too.  Just a livetweet of my thoughts while rewatching it. I wanted to remind myself of this show’s potential to break my heart before Ephemeral. 😅) I don't know what to think about Emilie at all honestly, But I have to wonder what she would think about the fact that Gabriel takes time to talk to her in a coma or whatever instead of talking to his son? I love when Rose is 100% done with Marinette putting off telling Adrien and I'm here for it. Maybe, the most unrealistic part about this show is that none of her friends have pulled Adrien aside and just spelled it out for him. They all want her to tell him herself. *Casually breaks into the Agreste Mansion* Yes, Ladybug everything in Adrien's room is... Adrien's. Girl has it so bad. Adrien wins a fencing tournament, gets scolded for coming back late and has to tell his father's assistant to relay the message that he won his tournament. This house is so toxic my gosh. Ladybug literally sniffing his pillow. ADRIEN'S REALIZATION IN THIS EPISODE HE'S SO HAPPY IT'S HER! 🥺💕 The flashback with Ladynoir: "Why do you think it would be lying." - CN "Because there's this boy I---" - LB Back to present "Me!" - Adrien Like, *chefs kiss* I love it. brb sobbing. 😭 ---- "Everything will be just fine, I promise!" Narrator Voice: Everything was not fine. ---- Bunnix always makes me think of that quote from Lilo and Stitch where Cobra Bubbles says "I am the one they call when things go wrong and things have indeed gone wrong." There he is. Listen, Chat Blanc is SO creepy to me. The unsettling feeling when he's on screen is nuts. This is Adrien. ADRIEN. They did such an amazing job making him eerie and uncanny. He's familiar, but it's all so mixed up and so wrong and heartbreaking. "Chat Blanc has gotten into some mischief." The look on his face. The tear. "Save me." "My poor kitty, do you remember where the akuma went?" *grabs her hand and put it over his heart* "Here, but it's already broken." As I said EERIE.

Her shock when he calls her Marinette as he's attacking her. I hate it so much that this is what she worries about that THIS is what Marinette thinks is destined to happen if he ever finds out her name. I love that Adrien found out who she was and that she loves him. Then he immediately goes to find her and tells her he loves her. There was not one single doubt in this boy's mind once he had the facts. *Adrienette kiss* "It's worse than I thought." - Bunnix That's always going to be hilarious to me I'm sorry. "Things were purrfect until Hawkmoth found out about everything, once the cat is out of the bag it's only a matter of time before everyone knows. It was our love that did this to the world M'lady." Okay wait. I don't often think about that full quote. I get caught up on the end. Which obviously, that's the part that Marinette worries about too. But he DID tell her in a way what actually happened. It was because Hawkmoth found out. That part of the explanation is just so quick and overshadowed by the last part it's not what she dwells on. TOM DUPAIN NOT HAVING GABRIEL'S CRAP GO OFF. "She loves Adrien and Adrien loves her!" And throwing them out of his bakery. He's going to be such an amazing father-in-law to Adrien someday. Adrien deserves an ACTUAL father figure who loves him. Gabriel's original plan was to force Adrien's girlfriend to breakup with him by threatening to take away the small amount of freedom Adrien has. Knowing that the breakup would crush Adrien but ALSO knowing it would devastate Marinette to the point he could akumatize her. That original plan was so awful and manipulative on several levels but somehow SOMEWAY he came up with something worse. Gorilla is the only adult in that house with a soul. Adrien's tears. Just. My. Gosh. The way Adrien runs to her, transforms and CATACLYSMS an akuma. There will be no purifying for that one RIP. This scene is so heartfelt and beautiful. I hate Nathalie. She didn't have to tell Hawkmoth what she saw. But she chose to, the end of the world is on her shoulders too. Chat Blanc definitely could have killed her. His motives here are literally just to go back and make things right. His mind is scrambled and his approach is obviously wrong. But he's making her fall so she can SEE what happened to some degree. He wants her to understand. Seeing Hawkmoth and Ladybug's cataclysmed bodies is just intense. When Ladybug reaches out to her corpse and it turns to dust drifting in the floodwaters it hits hard. This is what Chat Blanc wants to fix. She's not listening because she's scared and his mind is a scrambled mess so I’m not sure he’d be able to explain it well, or even remember it completely anyway. ((Ephemeral trailer talk for a sec)) His face when he sees his mother like that. The realization of what's really happening in his house. We're going to have to go through that again soon. My heart hurts.  ((Okay, I’m done.)) Hawkmoth throwing his son and beating his son across Paris. He knows FULL WELL it is his son. He knows he's akumatizing him and he DOES NOT CARE as long as he gets what he wants. I hate this man. I hate him. Adrien looks so terrified and who could blame him. Annnnd now I'm legit crying I hate this. He doesn't want this. The fact that, even akumatized, he doesn't listen to his father. He refuses to use this power on Ladybug. He also refuses to use it on his father. I've always interpreted Chat Blanc’s actions there like he was trying to contain the destruction to himself. Which, I believe, he thought would destroy him, but spare everyone else. Obviously, it destroyed the moon, cataclysmed anyone nearby, and flooded everything instead. Chat Blanc has completely lost everything AND he is akumatized. There are times when he's haunting, menacing, sweet, violent, unhinged, desperate, and in despair. That rollercoaster of confusion and emotions comes through like crazy in Bryce's performance. Just incredible. Chat Blanc flicking his bell was absolutely some part of his consciousness telling Ladybug where the akuma was and you'll never convince me otherwise. Chat Noir changing back to normal, seeing the world destroyed and having so much faith in her to fix it.  I just love them. I know that Bunnix knows things we don't know. But my impatient self wished she would have clarified a little more. Time is fragile and obviously she's knows how the timeline *should* go. The meeting between Ladynoir at the end tho. She just wanted to see that her kitty was safe. It's so sweet.  Well, that's the end of this long thread of me reminding myself what kind of pain this show is capable of putting me through before I watch Ephemeral. 

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 10 second part

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Meta)

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Unclean Realm

Lan Wangji has a Louis Henry Sullivan moment on seeing the Nie family home, becoming enraptured by its overwrought monumental architecture after a lifetime of restrained good taste and single-story buildings.

He approaches the fortress with the expression of delighted wonder that he usually reserves for when he’s looking at the moon or at Wei Wuxian.

Wei Wuxian is like, yep that’s a building, all right, but he supports Lan Wangji’s kinks.  

Meng Yao tells them about the Wen Clan directive, and has what appears to be a moment of genuine, affectionate amusement at Nie Huaisang’s reaction.

Jiang Cheng kinda blames the Lans for inventing the whole “indoctrination” thing and for encouraging his brother’s disaster bi tendencies. Wei Wuxian responds by complimenting the Lan Clan, almost like someone who met his true love got some real value out of the instruction he received there.  

(more after the cut)

One of the great ironies of this story is that Wei Wuxian sort of becomes a rogue Lan disciple because of his relationship with Lan Wangji. He relies on Lan temperament techniques, uses music as a primary cultivation method, has committed all of the Lan rules to his supposedly terrible memory and cites them on multiple occasions, and is an important mentor for the younger generation Lan disciples. Because Hanguang-Jun is just that good in bed.

Xue Yang in the background of this conversation is channeling OP’s church-enduring, school-enduring inner 10-year-old.

Nie Mingjue, Chifeng-Zun, appears, and couldn’t be more different than his brother. On first watching this episode, I saw him as a grumpy, sexy, very emotional leather daddy man who is quick to anger. Rewatching, I see someone who’s struggling with a growing illness...the resentful energy kind.

Nie Mingjue’s handling of resentful energy is very different from Wei Wuxian’s straightforward interest and acceptance. NMJ has a traditional cultivator’s view of it, regarding it as evil and as something to resist, while he is literally carrying it on his back. He’s like a secret alcoholic who is preaching temperence, and can’t find a way to be reconciled with himself.  

At this point of the story, Nie Mingjue is keeping it together, but is under a hell of a lot of stress, and Baxia’s blood thirst is already maybe a problem.

The Yunmeng bros think that Nie Huaisang’s fear of his brother is hilarious, because they don’t understand the situation. They think he’s just living in a hideously toxic family dynamic like theirs, when actually he’s in a loving, sorta healthy, if parentless, family that is being crushed under a generational curse.

Compliments for the Yunmeng Bros

I’m not the first meta poster to notice how happy Jiang Cheng is to be praised by Nie Mingjue.

He never gets this at home. Jiang Yanli praises him, but in that watery “you tried your best” way that doesn’t really stick.  Nie Mingjue’s praise really means something, because he is a fearsome warrior and stern authority figure. And this is a double compliment, because Nie Mingjue says he heard it from Lan Xichen, and agrees with it.

Let’s Make Terrible Decisions

Keep Xue Yang alive, says Wei Wuxian, and Meng Yao immediately agrees, although I’m pretty sure he would have proposed that even if WWX hadn’t.

So they do, not realizing that “kill him later” is never a good plan for someone who 1. super needs killing 2. has a whole lot of death-dealing skills.

Future clan leader Jiang Cheng notices how smart and talented Meng Yao is.  Xue Yang finds it hilarious when the trio praises Meng Yao, possibly because their evil team up is already underway.

Boss’ Bed Warmer Son of a Ho

The constant insults toward Meng Yao are about his mom, but there’s another level of leering implication, that Meng Yao seems to encourage in his conversation with the soon-to-be-murdered guard captain.

Nie Mingjue elevated him way above his expectations, and he is ridiculously pretty, which has to create rumors. In the Nightless City scenes when he’s fondling Baxia and telling Nie Mingjue’s family secrets there’s definitely a sense of intimacy that’s not just “loyal retainer.”

I feel like maybe this whole exchange is a bit of theater designed to show Xue Yang something without showing it to anyone else. Meng Yao didn’t need to have this conversation in front of his prisoner.

Let’s Do Exactly What We Said We Wouldn’t

Once the younger quartet are alone with Nie Mingjue, Wei Wuxian crosses the room away from his friends and practically into Lan Wangji’s pocket, if Lan Wangji had pockets.

He has no pockets and also has no personal bubble any more, when it comes to Wei Wuxian.

We could make a weapon out of Yin Iron, Wei Wuxian says, completely forgetting his entire conversation with Lan Yi, apparently. Lan Wangji doesn’t argue with this idea.

Nie Mingjue warns Wei Wuxian not to try it.

I stabbed a man in Qinghe just to watch him die

Nie Mingjue is like the Johnny Cash of the cultivation world, carrying the weight of his poor choices and trying to steer the young folk to the path of righteousness. But--like Johnny Cash--his bad choices have made him really fucking cool, so he isn’t very good at deterring anybody.

Meng Yao Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends

Immediately after Meng Yao’s fellow Nie clan people call him “son of a whore” again, Wei Wuxian meets him, is nice to him, addresses him by his military title, bows to him, asks why he’s away from the party, and thanks him for his service.

But Meng Yao has already decided to make friends with Xue Yang, so Wei Wuxian goes onto his list of people that he doesn’t give a crap about except if they can be useful to him.  Then Meng Yao goes to make out hatch a plot with Xue Yang.

I’ll Sleep On Your Roof

Meeting SongXiao seems to have done away with the last of Lan Wangji’s resistance to his connection with Wei Wuxian.

He hears a noise on the roof and, when realizing it’s Wei Wuxian, he smiles one of his tiny reserved smiles before heading outside.

When he sees Wei Wuxian drunkenly sprawled on the roof, limbs akimbo, wine on his chin and neck, mouth full of poetry about the open road, Lan Wangji gives him the most fond look imaginable.

Then he reluctantly leaves, with his signature “say goodbye, but only when he can’t hear you” thing.

They’ve both come a really long way since their first meeting. Wei Wuxian is openly and vocally attaching himself to Lan Wangji...but is not actually entering his space or asking for anything from him; he just wants to be near him, and wants to let him know that. “I’ll sleep on your roof tonight.”

And Lan Wangji just...loves him. Wei Wuxian is drunk, embarrassing, demonstrative, eager to make a hell weapon out of yin iron, touchy feely, and absurdly sexy. And Lan Wangji is pretty okay with all of that.

I Might Have Been Drunk

Wei Wuxian carefully avoids telling Jiang Cheng where he was last night.

Even if he did get blackout drunk, he would have woken up on Lan Wangji’s roof. And I don’t think he was as drunk as that. He just knows Jiang Cheng wouldn’t like the truth.

Wen Fucking Chao, Again

Wen Chao shows up to be annoying and boring.  This leads to a pretty good fight between Nie Mingjue and Wen Zhuliu. Note that when the chips are down, Nie Huaisang stands with his Gege without any cowering. Almost as if he had hidden reserves of bravery, and is not as helpless as he lets on.

Wen Zhuliu isn’t styled to be super hot, although he’s certainly compelling, and in Dance of the Phoenix he looks good with sensitive-guy hair wispies. I wonder what actor Feng Mingjing looks like out of character?

BRB, adding a tag to my follow list

Battle Bros

When the fighting breaks out, the Yunmeng brothers are decisive and united, with Wei Wuxian giving orders to Jiang Cheng and JC following without hesitation.

I feel like if these two could have gone through a few big battles together, instead of being separated during most of the Sunshot campaign, their whole relationship would have improved. On the battlefield, they respect, trust, and understand each other.  

The Pointy End

Nie Mingjue is holding his own against Wen Zhuliu, but he gets distracted by Meng Yao hollering “Xue Yang has escaped” and then shanking the guard captain right in front of him.

Wen Zhuliu takes advantage of the distraction to aim a very slow stab at Nie Huasang, and Meng Yao jumps in front to get stabbed on his behalf.

When the Yunmeng bros show up to help NMJ, Wen Zhuliu immeiately yanks Wen Chao back behind him and points his sword at Wei Wuxian. He absolutely sees these two as a serious threat.  Considering that eventually WWX is going to kill Wen Chao while JC kills Wen Zhuliu, this concern is not misplaced.

Wei Wuxian tells Wen Chao to stop being such a jerk, and Wen Chao menaces Wei Wuxian and gloats about the burning of cloud recesses. The burning, that is, of some part of cloud recesses that doesn’t include the library, the Jingshi, the main cultivation chamber, the rabbit warren, or Lan Qiren’s house, unless the Lan Clan is really really good at rebuilding things to very exact specifications.

In a rare moment of seeing Meng Yao’s internal thoughts, he is worried about Lan Xichen when he hears about cloud recesses.

The Yelling Part

Now we have the particularly nasty breakup between Nie Mingjue and Meng Yao. It’s...got some layers. Meng Yao is cowering on the floor, but is not apologizing.

He never apologizes throughout this encounter.

孟瑤無悔  - Meng Yao (has) no regrets

This scene is amazing and excruciating to watch, even more when you know what’s ahead.

What the Fuck is Meng Yao’s Plan

On one level this is Meng Yao, manipulative sociopath, setting up a cover story for his aiding and alliance with Xue Yang.  On another, this is Meng Yao, loving subordinate, being tossed aside by his lord because he dared to stand up for himself.

He uses the same “scout’s honor” gesture we’ve seen Wei Wuxian use to swear he’s telling the truth. Wei Wuxian is always lying when he uses this gesture.

I’m...not sure exactly what Meng Yao’s plan is, with all these chess moves? By stabbing the captain in front of NHS, he created an opportunity to plant a cover story about Xue Yang’s escape. He might be hoping that Nie Mingjue will forgive him and keep him on, while Xue Yang can stay in his back pocket to be used later.

Dry eyes? Try Visene

Or he might be intending to get kicked out, given his non-apology. In any case, Nie Mingjue is weeping during this encounter, and Meng Yao...isn’t. He is signaling distress in his voice, expression, and body language, but his eyes are dry up until the last moment, and even then they just glisten a bit. In a show where every actor is an expert at crying on cue, that’s got to be a deliberate choice.

Which isn’t to say that Meng Yao is faking being full of emotion in this scene. It’s just that the emotion isn’t necessarily sorrow.

What Does Nie Mingjue’s Head Think

Flip the view and this is about Nie Mingjue being betrayed by a subordinate, who has turned out to be a self-serving murderer. And on another level it’s Nie Mingjue being betrayed by his lover, who was just using him for advancement.

I rewatched the later episode where we get the scene as Nie Mingjue’s head perceived it, and he’s particularly brokenhearted and disillusioned from his head’s POV.  In that version there is a telling addition to the conversation.

Nie Mingjue asks about the guys who were roasting Meng Yao behind his back. He asks, if I hadn’t come, would you have murdered all of them?

Um. No, dude. Of course fucking not. That’s what a patriarchal authority does. That’s the way an angry Nie Mingjue/Baxia team might solve a problem.

Meng Yao has to use subterfuge to kill his enemies. And while he super hates being called “son of a whore” it’s absolutely not enough to make him kill someone, with the risk murder brings. Likewise, being treated well isn’t enough to make him spare someone. Nie Mingjue totally doesn’t get this, because he’s been the patriarch of this clan his entire adult life.

And Here’s the Actual Problem

There is a betrayal here, but Nie Mingjue is not simply a victim.  Whether it’s a sexual relationship or a non-sexual bond of affection, there can be nothing solid in Nie Mingjue and Meng Yao’s relationship within a feudal society, because it is fundamentally unequal. Even if they love each other deeply - which I’m not convinced either of them does - every encounter they have is tainted with power dynamics.

Meng Yao has been elevated by Nie Mingjue and quite probably taken into his bed, as well as being told many family secrets, but has not been given a new surname (like, for example, Wen Zhuliu was) or independent power. More importantly, Nie Mingjue has not used his authority to remove or punish the many people who disrespect his subordinate.  Lan Qiren would have had all of those gossipy fuckers kneeling in the snow, and Wen Ruohan would feed them to his mosh pit zombies.

Meng Yao is a murderous little snake, but he is right to be angry with Nie Mingjue about some things, and his pursuit of his own agenda is understandable.

Well, That Was a Slice

Meng Yao leaves, hurt, with a dignified bow; just as he did that one time when his dad kicked him down the Carp Tower steps.

Take note, both patriarchal authorities: that is his way of saying “I’m going to murder you one day.”

Nie Mingjue sits with his broken heart, as we realize that we’ve only spent 20 minutes with this guy and we’ve gone on an entire emotional journey with him. This episode packed in a LOT.

Soundtrack: Johnny Cash, Folsom Prison Blues

[youremyonlyhope]

Attack of the Clones

Ok first of all, why must the poster be so dramatic? It looks like a romance novel but then there’s an explosion under them. Ok I mean I guess that’s a good representation of the movie, but still.

Now, this was the first Star Wars movie I saw in theaters, if I’m remembering correctly. Or at least I think it was... I don’t remember seeing it in theatres but I’m pretty sure I did... I honestly have less memory of this movie than Phantom Menace. And, made clear from my last post, I really only remembered random bits and pieces of Phantom Menace. But my only memory of Attack of the Clones is watching it in my living room like... 13+ years ago and it was some scene where they had a fight in an arena of some sort. Padme was wearing white and had a gun. That’s the only thing I know I definitely remember from this movie.

So I’m almost basically going into this with completely fresh eyes.

Oh no, people want to leave the Republic? I don’t remember this. Also lol Count Dooku. My family has an inside joke about him, and I can’t take him seriously at all. Ok cool, the CGI has gotten better in the last 3 years. That chrome ship is gorgeous. Still hasn’t aged well though. “I guess I was wrong, there was no danger at all” *EXPLOSION* OH MY GOD. NOT EXPECTING THAT. I DON’T REMEMBER THIS. See, I knew that that wasn’t Padme, but I didn’t realize she was supposed to be a Padme decoy (since she’s not an exact clone of Natalie the way Keira is). I just thought she was another high ranking Naboo person or something. So... I’m really glad we had the decoy... I mean... poor girl... but at least Padme’s safe... The Yoda CGI hasn’t aged as well as the ship’s CGI did. “Seeing you alive brings warm feelings to my heart.” That sentence wasn’t... “Yoda” enough... word order wise I mean. We should all listen to Padme more often. Ok. Why is Padme’s wig kinky textured with tiny braids? Is this the one time I have to complain about Padme’s wardrobe? Why must the Twi’lek senator have a robe with a low neckline and a cutout on her stomach? Obi-Wan has new hair. Well... anything’s better than the ponytail and the rattail. On that note: now Ani has the ponytail and the rattail. Why? Seriously costume designer: WHY!? Why did you do that to them? On THAT note: flustered nervous Ani is adorable. How did he go so wrong? Oh but Padme’s dress is so beautiful now that we get longer full body shots of her. “So have you. Grown more beautiful I mean.” Awww. Sweet kid. “She barely even recognized me, Jar Jar.” Dude, it’s been 10 years, and you hit puberty. She’s not supposed to recognize you right away. And she recognized you pretty quickly. And you really thought of her every day? That’s creepy. Was that Boba Fett? Also I remember the veil attached to the helmet vividly for some reason... why? I like that Ani’s already dressed in darker colors just because he’s dramatic. “I don’t think she liked me watching her.” Hey. Ani. Maybe it’s because she doesn’t want the guy who’s been thinking about her everyday for 10 years to be watching her all the time on a camera when she can’t see him too. Maybe it’s because you’re a little creepy. Just maybe. ...I think I might remember these worm things... but also I might not... I feel scared so I guess that’s some feelings leftover from 6-year-old-me. You had one job, R2-D2. One job! “The Chancellor doesn’t appear to be corrupt.” Wow, you could not be more wrong with that statement. BOY. YOU JUST SWIPED YOUR LIGHTSABER AT THE WORMS ON PADME. IF SHE HAD WOKEN UP A HALF SECOND EARLIER WHEN YOU LANDED ON THE BED SHE MIGHT HAVE FLINCHED AND YOU WOULD HAVE BEHEADED HER. COME ON. This boy has a death wish diving down in the speeder like that. OH SO THIS IS THE SCENE WHERE HE JUST RANDOMLY JUMPS OUT OF THE SPEEDER. “If you’ll excuse me” THIS BOY LITERALLY WANTS TO DIE. Did... did her face just change to like... green-ish...? I rewinded and yeah her lips turned dark blue and her skin was green with... scales? Or was it just the lighting? Because... that was kind of terrifying... So she’s wearing a veil AND can change her face? That’s fun. “Use the force, think.” Ok, Ani can only do one of those things.  “Why do I get the feeling you’re going to be the death of me?” Ha. Ha ha ha. HA HA HA HA HA. *Sobs* Changeling? Cool. So I’m not going crazy, her face did change.

Dealer: You want to buy any death sticks? Obi-Wan: You don’t want to sell me any death sticks. Dealer: I don’t want to sell you any death sticks. Obi-Wan: You want to go home and rethink your life. Dealer: I want to go home and rethink my life.

That’s hilarious. I was just thinking “Does anyone lose any arms in this one? Someone has to eventually.” And sure enough, there goes her arm. Arm #7 I like that Yoda just floats in a chair next to them as they walk. I actually like that Jar Jar gets to be Naboo’s representative in the Senate though. Having a Gungar senator of Naboo just seems right if they live there too. AWWWWW. She has Leia-esque buns. “I’m ready for the trials, but he feels that I’m too unpredictable.” Gee. I wonder why he would think that Anakin “If-You’ll-Excuse-Me-While-I-Jump-Out-of-a-Speeder” Skywalker is unpredictable? Ok, the music that is playing. I gotta figure out which song it is later because this music is like... definitive Star Wars music for me. “Sorry m’lady.” OH GOD EW ANI I JUST CRINGED.

Padme: *Needs to travel with refugees and blend in* Padme: *Wears an intricate cloak and a giant headdress*

Perfect logic. Droid with a stereotypical waitress accent. I kinda love it. Ok seriously, the alien CGI has not aged well. The alien chef guy (Dex?) has a mustache. That is too much. “If an object does not appear in our records, it does not exist.” Ok. So does it actually not exist, or does it not exist in the records (but does in real life), or do you guys just deny its existence in general just because? Awwww... so you’re telling me that Obi-Wan kept one of those orbs all those years and trained Luke with one? And it’s just like how they used to train the children? Why do I have feels over this? “Lost a planet, Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing.” I LOVE YODA. Only a Jedi can erase files? Really? OK. OK WHO PLAYS THE NEW QUEEN. BRB GONNA GO CHECK. She was in one episode of Doctor Who, Planet of the Ood. Ok cool. Anakin. Don’t interrupt Senator Amidala. Listen to her. Come on. What happened to the sweet boy from 10 years ago? THE SUPER TALL WHITE ALIEN WITH THE LONG NECK AND BIG EYES. I REMEMBER YOU. I REMEMBER YOU SO VIVIDLY. I JUST GASPED. “After all these years we were beginning to think you weren’t coming.” That’s not suspicious at all. Well. At least they’re not evil. They’re just taking orders from a mysterious evil dead Jedi. AHHHH ONE OF MY FAVE PADME OUTFITS!  Ok the sand line isn’t as stupid out of context, I’ll give them that. Still gonna make fun of it though. Creepily touching her back. The dress may expose her back skin, but that’s not an invitation to touch it, Ani. So many clone babies. I think I remember this. “Oh... we... keep him here.” YEAH. TOTALLY NOT SUSPICIOUS AT ALL. Clone trooper reveal! This is a not a drill people! We just saw the clones in clone trooper armor! Oh, how I wish I could go back and be able to witness audience reactions to that shot. Ok. Ok. Yeah. That shot of all of them. In lines. In formation. I whispered “Oh my god” and covered my mouth just then. So did he want a clone of himself so he could be a father? Or was there some other reason... Another one of my fave Padme outfits! With Leia buns! “I like 2 or 3.” So, just Padme and Palpatine you mean.  “Sounds to me like a dictatorship.” “Well... if it works.” And here’s where Padme should have just run away screaming and never looked back. I thought those aliens were boulders until Ani rode one. Ok, it was so he could be a father to the clone. Cool. Kinda cute. Hmm... suspicious. I kinda hate that you can see the pear is clearly CGI for this entire scene. “I’m haunted by the kiss that you should never have given me.” Ok. That’s a name of a song in Ani: the Musical isn’t it? I need to rewatch Ani: the Musical once I finish rewatching all the Star Wars movies. Because even though I understood Ani: the Musical enough to find it hilarious and genius, apparently it was even more genius than I thought and a lot of stuff went over my head. But of course, it’s StarKid, they’re always geniuses, so I shouldn’t be surprised. “You are asking me to be rational. That is something I know I cannot do” Yeah. That’s for sure, Mr. Jump-Out-of-A-Moving-Speeder. BINARY SUNSET IS PLAYING AGAIN. GOD WHY DOES THAT SONG GIVE ME ALL THE FEELS. Also I took a moment to listen to Leia’s theme on YouTube, just to refresh my memory to keep an eye out for it, and through suggested videos I figured out that the music I keep hearing and saying defines Star Wars for me is Anakin and Padme’s Theme/Across the Stars. Obvious name. I should have guessed it. Anyway, yeah, that music is Star Wars to me. So even though I remember very little of this movie, this music definitely made an impact. DID... DID... HE JUST SAY “BOBA GET ON BOARD”???????? DID THEY SAY THE KID’S NAME WAS BOBA EARLIER? DID I MISS THAT? IT TOOK A SECOND IT WAS LIKE JANGO: “BOBA GET ON BOARD” ME: *3...2...1...* *GASP!!!!!* OH MY GOD. I REMEMBER LITERALLY NONE OF THIS. See, I had wondered about the Fett last name when it was mentioned earlier, but I literally was like “Jango Fett? Huh, I guess all bounty hunters just choose Fett as their last name lol what a funny coincidence” BUT NO. IT’S A FAMILY NAME. WOW. I AM STUPID. “Oh, not good.” There always needs to be an understatement of the movie. Last time it was Ani saying “This is tense!” and so far this time it’s this Obi-Wan line. I mean, yeah, it’s totally possible for Jango Fett to climb up a smooth curved metal surface with metal gloves in the rain. Totally possible. I mean yeah, a gold chariot while wearing a giant silver leopard (or snake?) print cloak isn’t gonna draw attention at all. FINALLY C-3PO. OWEN LARS. OWEN. AS IN UNCLE OWEN. FINALLY. You know, I always wondered just how Owen was Luke’s uncle if Ani didn’t have any siblings. But because it’d been so long since I saw this movie, I couldn’t remember. Ok but honestly, I should have realized we were gonna see Uncle Owen the moment what’s-his-face-Ani’s-old-owner (I refuse to learn his name) said “A moisture farmer”. Literally I thought to myself “Moisture farmer? Wow! That’s just like Luke’s uncle!” like wow I am slow today at catching on to this stuff. I might pause soon and go to bed since it’s almost 3am and obviously, my brain cannot function properly right now since usually I catch on to more of these little hints and stuff. On that note, the actor playing young Owen is kind of spot-on. “After I lost my leg” Have I been counting legs? Well, now I will. Leg #1. More Leia buns. More Binary Sunset! OK wait. If there are 2 suns, should they all have 2 shadows? I googled it, but it’s officially way too late at night for me to try to understand astronomy so I’ll try again in the morning to understand the explanations. Apparently the answer might be no. Oh fun, all the evil people coming together to build a huge army. Ok wait. Does Ani like... slaughter all the people who tortured his mom? Do I remember that correctly? Yeah that’s a yes. Beheading everyone. Great. I don’t blame him, but boy, this is how you end up succumbing to the dark side. A LITTLE HINT OF THE IMPERIAL MARCH. YES. BUT ALSO NO. “I told him to stay on Naboo” When has Ani ever listened to you though? Oh wow full on Imperial March now. Ok I’m gonna stop it here at the 1:28:10 mark for tonight because I’m sleepy. There’s a little under an hour left.

Annnnnnd it’s 11:00pm at night the next day, I gotta be up at 7:30, so this is a perfect time to finish the movie! Logic!

Ok but Padme’s in the white outfit that I know she’s wearing as she wields a gun and gets her shirt all ripped up so, obviously, Anakin’s not gonna keep them out of trouble for much longer. So... Obi-Wan is too far from the Jedi council to send the message... but Anakin is close enough.... but they’re less than a parsec away from each other. Either Lucas got lazy, or Obi-Wan was literally just barely out of range. Oh wow, Padme being reckless and unpredictable for once? And here I was thinking it was going to be Anakin’s idea to go to Obi-Wan. No wonder he loves her. And I love her loopy bun. Oh wait, so Dooku isn’t bad? I was remembering him as bad, but he’s warning Obi-Wan about there being a Sith Lord leading the Republic. (Update: He’s bad, I’m stupid and too trusting and reverting back to being 6-years-old.) “Meesa suppose that the senate give powers to the supreme chancellor.” SITH LORD JAR JAR BINKS CONFIRMED. “I love democracy. I love the Republic.” Never heard anything less sincere in my life. That looked physically painful for him to say. God I love R2 and 3PO’s relationship. Even this early on. Ahhhhhhh Binary Sunset again. Can you tell it’s my favorite piece of Star Wars music? Seriously every time I hear it I squeal. Ok this whole sequence is so CGI happy. You didn’t need to use CGI for C-3PO, you didn’t need half of this to be CGI. Practical effects would have been better. But fine, the head switching thing was funny. HIS ARM IS ENCASED IN METAL. FORESHADOWING!!!!! Oh no, not his lightsaber. Now starts the only part of the movie I actually remember. And Obi-Wan’s just like “Of course.” as they are rolled by him. “Then we decided to come and rescue you.” “...Good job.” I ADORE OBI-WAN. All of these monsters are making me NOPE on so many levels, and I know most of that fear comes from 6-year-old-Hope.

Ani: What about Padme. Obi-Wan: She seems to be on top of things. Padme: *Freeing herself and climbing up a pole*

This is why Padme was my everything when I was little. Not gonna lie, up until this part I kinda forgot that they wanted Padme dead. I had a day long break from the movie, so give me a break. So yeah... Jango Fett has a flamethrower in his wrist? That’s not fair. Is this when we see Mace’s purple lightsaber for the first time? I don’t remember seeing it before this. But obviously, I have really bad memory so who knows. And Padme in that outfit shooting a gun is something I remember vividly from childhood. I JUST GASPED SO LOUDLY JUST NOW. MACE JUST STRAIGHT UP BEHEADED JANGO. OH MY GOD. AND LITTLE BOBA WATCHED. WELL. THAT’S HIS BACKSTORY EXPLAINED. OH MY GOD. I DON’T REMEMBER THIS AT ALL. MY JAW IS STILL DROPPED AS I TYPE THIS. *R2D2 just randomly rolls into the battle and straight to C-3PO* ok sure. *Yoda comes flying in with an army of Stormtroopers* YES. EPIC. AMAZING. I LOVE YODA SO MUCH. Um.... but you left R2D2 and C-3PO behind! THIS. KID. IS. HOLDING. HIS. DAD’S. SEVERED. HEAD. NO WONDER HE’S SO MESSED UP. Dooku’s master? I don’t remember him having a master. 6-year-old-Hope literally must not have paid attention to any scenes in this movie that didn’t involve Padme. “I will take the designs with me” *Puts up hologram of the Death Star* I love love love love LOVE all the reveals though. Like, say what you will about the prequels, but the reveals of and references to stuff the original trilogy are amazing. Main Star Wars theme coming in, I hear you. Ani, you gotta learn to control your emotions dude. “We’ll take him slowly. You take him from the left–” “NO I’M TAKING HIM NOW” “NO ANAKIN NO!” I mean, is there an exchange that describes Anakin better than that? How has Obi-Wan dealt with him for 10 years? And Count Dooku can lightningbend. I don’t remember this at all. Ok ok ok. Pausing for a second to see how old Christopher Lee was in this because I know he was like super old and yet here he is having a lightsaber duel. ...DUDE WAS 80 WHEN THE MOVIE CAME OUT. THIS. DUDE. WAS. 80. AND JUMPING AND DOING ALL THESE TRICKS AND STUFF. DUDE. DUDE. AMAZING. (If it was a stunt double I’m gonna feel real stupid) Aww for a second I thought he cut off Obi-Wan’s arm. I’m almost disappointed. I wanted to count another severed arm. Anakin’s weilding 2 lightsabers. I don’t remember this. But that is epic. NOW there goes another arm! Oh poor Ani. Arm #8. I’m gonna admit it. I’m not ashamed. Once I heard Yoda’s signature grumbling I gasped and went “Ah! Yoda!” out loud because I had completely forgotten about him dueling Count Dooku until just now. I DIDN’T KNOW YODA COULD LIGHTNINGBEND TOO! OR I GUESS IN THIS CASE REDIRECT LIGHTNING! YODA IS AMAZING. OH. HE JUST ABSORBED IT ALL. ZUKO COULDN’T DO THAT. WOW. PRINCE ZUKO, TAKE NOTES. I feel like the animator had the best day of his life animating Yoda in this duel since Yoda is being so extra. “Fought well, you have, my old padawan.” DOOKU WAS HIS PADAWAN? AND QUI-GON WAS DOOKU’S. AND OBI-WAN WAS QUI-GON’S. AND ANAKIN WAS OBI-WAN’S. SO ANAKIN IS YODA’S GREAT-GREAT-GRAND-PADAWAN. WOW. AND I GUESS LUKE IS ALSO? Dooku, that’s cheating. Ok what is this, some type of sail boat space ship? There’s no wind in space, what is the point of these molten metal sail things on Dooku’s ship then? Ooooh... first reveal that this Darth Sidious is the Emperor from the original series. And it kinda partially reveals that it’s Palpatine. And yeah up until this point I forgot that Dooku’s master was Sidious. Dooku telling Obi-Wan about Sidious really threw me off. Because as you can see earlier in the post, I was like “Ok but he’s telling them about the Sith Lord so is he really that bad?” and nope it was just reverse psychology or something and I really fell for it. The Imperial March playing as we see all the clones, I just went “ahhhhhhh” out loud, dropped my crocheting (because of course I’m crocheting while watching this, I’m always crocheting), and raised my arms up. Oh my god. And the music getting more intense as we look at Palpatine and the Senators! Yes! YES YES YES! Guys. I am not gonna lie. That whole sequence of “The Clone Wars have begun” and showing them with the Imperial March just made me get really really excited. Oh my god. Chills. I am jumping in my seat. I am flailing my arms. Oh my god. Aaaaaand Anakin and Padme are getting married. I literally just said “Uh oh” out loud. Ok also, how did R2D2 and C3PO get back? OK but her wedding dress is gorgeous. I just went “Ahhh” and cringed at Anakin’s metal hand. It’s so creepy. I do love Anakin and Padme’s Theme so much though.

Well. I enjoyed that. Yeah, I got sleepy about an hour and a half in, but it was 3am and I knew that since I tend to pause every 2 seconds to put something into this post, I wouldn’t finish the last hour of the movie until at least 5am (it’s 1am right now, I started watching the last hour at about 11pm, so yeah about 2 hours to watch the hour). So yeah. But I enjoyed it.

Why do people hate the prequels so much? Am I biased because they’re what I saw when I was little? Because obviously, I remembered NONE of this movie except for the big fight scene and Padme’s outfits. Literally nothing else. But I still enjoyed it. I wish the dialogue was better, if they could redo the prequels with better dialogue and better directing, they’d be amazing. But even with the bad dialogue and directing you still just feel happiness, like you’re at home, because this is still Star Wars. And you still love the universe and the story. So yeah. I liked it.