#and then i create these conspiracy theories and detach myself from reality/spiral into “everyone hates me my husband is leaving me im dying”
Text
.
Tag vent, needed to get it out. TW suicide/SH/mental health/inaccessible care
#my mental health is rapidly declining and I feel like my life is falling apart#i want to go back to therapy and i want to get back on meds but I cant afford it#I just feel so empty sometimes for no reason#and then my brain will try and solve it like THIS is why youre upset#and then i create these conspiracy theories and detach myself from reality/spiral into “everyone hates me my husband is leaving me im dying”#i relapsed recently for the first time since leaving my ex and I just feel myself slipping#and like suicidal thoughts over something as simple as breaking a mug i bought at the dollar store#or my USB not going in and getting so frustrated I start sobbing#what is wrong with me I just want to get better#i hate doing this to my husband i feel like my mental health is such a burden#which i know it isnt because he used to work in adolescent mental health care and he also has LIVED experience with bipolar#but hes doing great on meds and i cant recieve the help I need and I feel like im taking up too much space#i feel hard to love no matter how many hoops he jumps through to prove im not#but the reality is he shouldnt HAVE to jump through hoops like that and I feel like because he does it confirms i am hard to love
0 notes
Last Seen Blogs
