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junker-town · 5 years

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The 9 dumbest mistakes from NFL Week 12, ranked

Photo by Amy Lemus/NurPhoto via Getty Images

Almost everyone was sluggish in an ugly week in the NFL. But no one screwed up worse than Jason Garrett (again).

No one really wants to work hard this week. Thanksgiving — a perfect holiday that marries football, food, family, and online shopping — is mere days away. We are all just skating until Wednesday afternoon gets here and we peace out a few hours early to try to beat the traffic (spoiler: we will not).

That pre-holiday restlessness extends to the football field, apparently. Many teams, players, coaches, and officials looked entirely unenthused to be working this Sunday, because it showed in ugly game after ugly game.

Week 12 was summed up most accurately by the Patriots’ 13-9 win over the Cowboys. What should have been an exciting matchup between two of the most popular (and hated) teams in the NFL turned into a rain-soaked slopfest. The offense was at a minimum, the only real highlight came via a blocked punt, the refs decided to call two BS tripping penalties that confused everyone, and Jason Garrett’s decision-making might’ve earned himself a one-way ticket to New York.

(Oops, we might’ve spoiled the top spot on this week’s rankings. What can we say? We’re ready for Thanksgiving too.)

On that note, here’s a lazy bit of transition to bring you the nine dumbest mistakes from Week 12:

9. Mike Glennon fumbled twice in three snaps during garbage time

The Raiders got blown out by the Jets 34-3, and things got so bad that head coach Jon Gruden surrendered in the third quarter when he benched Derek Carr. That’s when backup Mike Glennon came into the game and promptly fumbled two times ... in the first three snaps:

Raiders QB Mike Glennon has trouble with the snap pic.twitter.com/FKsQkqPC2B

— Main Team (@MainTeamSports) November 24, 2019

Glennon stayed in for the rest of the game. He completed 4 of 7 passes for just 20 yards. His longest of five drives gained just 15 yards. He led the Raiders to exactly zero points. That’s the peak Mike Glennon experience right there.

8. The Packers keep going backward returning punts

Nothing much went right for the Packers in a 37-8 loss to the 49ers, especially on offense. The 49ers’ pass rush bullied the Green Bay offensive line. Aaron Rodgers was sacked five times, fumbled once, and put up a Blake Bortles-like stat line.

But don’t let that distract you from how bad their punt return game has been. Tremon Smith returned two punts for a grand total of -3 yards. That’s not great, but it’s even worse when you realize it’s been that way the entire season:

UPDATE: The Packers now have NEGATIVE 11 punt return yards on the ENTIRE SEASON.

— Matt Schneidman (@mattschneidman) November 25, 2019

The Packers are approaching historically inept levels with their punt return game. The 1965 Cardinals own the record for fewest punt returns yards in a season with 27, which is at least, y’know, a positive number.

So is the number of punt return yards Trevor Davis has with the Raiders this season: 108. The Packers traded him to Oakland in September, btw.

7. This terrible Mitchell Trubisky throw resulted in a pick, naturally

It hadn’t been a great week for Trubisky — season, really, but let’s just focus on this week. He was benched late in a loss to the Rams in Week 11, supposedly because of the hip injury he’s dealing with, even if everyone believes it was because he was stinking it up on the field.

Still, Trubisky mostly played better Sunday against the Giants. The Bears were up 19-7 in the fourth quarter and had a chance to add to their lead. That’s when he reverted back to his worst form and chucked the ball downfield right into the hands of Julian Love.

Julian Love!!! Guy had a rough week in his personal life. Getting his first real reps this week and his first NFL interception!! pic.twitter.com/9DKp2gYaIc

— Bobby Skinner (@BobbySkinner_) November 24, 2019

The Bears’ defense saved Trubisky and didn’t let the Giants score off of this turnover, at least. But it was his second pick of the game — the first came in the red zone — and the kind of terribly ill-advised throw that makes it easy to start picturing any number of veteran quarterbacks in a Bears uniform next season.

6. A Raiders stop turned into a Jets TD due to an awful roughing penalty

Oakland forced the Jets into a third-and-16 from the Raiders’ 20-yard line after Maxx Crosby picked up a clutch sack of Sam Darnold — or so the team thought. But Maurice Hurst’s dogged pursuit of the New York quarterback was ruled too violent for the back judge, even though nothing about his clean-up tackle seemed excessive.

One of the worst roughing the passer calls you’ll see. Probably cost Raiders four points. pic.twitter.com/Bu59Zd9Epd

— Dan Hanzus (@DanHanzus) November 24, 2019

Jon Gruden, uh, was not happy to say the least!

I think Jon Gruden said “Happy Thanksgiving”. pic.twitter.com/gKWRLirNB7

— Ryan Field (@RyanFieldABC) November 24, 2019

Instead of third-and-long, the Jets were treated to first-and-goal from the 4-yard line. One play later, Darnold scampered into the end zone to give his team a 10-3 lead.

5. Cam Jordan gave a Panthers’ drive new life with a stupid punch

The Saints got off to a 14-0 start early against Carolina, but the Panthers fought their way back throughout the second quarter to close that gap — and they can thank Jordan for six of those points.

Demario Davis had wrapped up quarterback Kyle Allen for the Saints’ second straight sack, bringing up what should have been fourth-and-long with a little more than three minutes left in the first half. But as officials whistled the play dead, Jordan swarmed Allen and decked him with a punch/shiver combination that connected with the Panther’s facemask and sent him to the turf.

Cameron Jordan tried to punch the ball out after the whistle and smashed Kyle Allen in the face instead, which is frowned upon pic.twitter.com/QQycxKnExJ

— Christian D'Andrea (@TrainIsland) November 24, 2019

This post-whistle forearm strike led to an easy unnecessary roughness call from the back judge. Rather than punting on fourth-and-26, Carolina was gifted a new set of downs. The Panthers then drove 56 yards to score a touchdown as time expired in the first half, cutting what could have been a 24-9 New Orleans lead down to 17-15.

Jordan would take to Twitter afterward to claim responsibility for his mistake shortly after the game.

Sheesh! Gotta hear that whistle... was trying to punch the ball out and make a big play ended up costing my defense... that’s on me gotta hear that whistle...

— cameron jordan (@camjordan94) November 24, 2019

He’s lucky it didn’t cost them the win because ...

4. The Panthers couldn’t get the ball in the end zone late AGAIN

For the third time this season, Carolina couldn’t score late in the red zone when it needed to. With just over two minutes left, it looked as if Kyle Allen was about to lead a game-winning touchdown drive. After Ron Rivera won a defensive pass interference challenge (AGAINST THE SAINTS), the Carolina offense had first-and-goal from the New Orleans 3-yard line.

Then the Panthers’ offense went backward, and lost 7 yards in three plays:

Coming out of the two-minute warning, Panthers kicker Joey Slye missed a 28-yarder, which allowed the Saints to counter with a game-winning field goal of their own to win it.

The worst part about this? This is now the third time the Panthers have lost a game late because they couldn’t score in the red zone. During losses to the Bucs and Packers this year, Christian McCaffrey was stopped short of the goal line.

3. Carson Wentz forgot how to throw a football

The Eagles had a chance to take an early 7-0 lead over the visiting Seahawks when Wentz dropped back on third-and-9 from the Seattle 10-yard line. Tailback Miles Sanders had darted out toward the sideline, and a soft toss would give him the chance to find the end zone and make a statement that the two-point home underdog wouldn’t be easily dismissed.

Instead, Wentz made a very different statement, one he’s made entirely too often this season.

Carson What? pic.twitter.com/22r9hkIijX

— Sean Wagner-McGough (@seanjwagner) November 24, 2019

Wentz threw a pass straight out of junior high gym class, missing Sanders by roughly five yards. The Eagles settled for a 28-yard field goal moments later.

2. Russell Wilson topped Carson Wentz with an even worse miss

The throw by Wentz to Sanders was bad, but that one wasn’t a guaranteed touchdown. The Eagles running back was going to evade a Seahawks defender or two to get into the end zone.

Wilson’s overthrow of Jacob Hollister in the end zone was way worse.

Third and goal, Wilson runs out the pocket and throws a duck to a wide-open Jacob Hollister.#Eagles got lucky. pic.twitter.com/QFAdylacRv

— DIE-HARD Fans (@Eaglesfans9) November 24, 2019

There’s a real chance Wilson wins the NFL MVP award and his ability to avoid the Eagles’ pass rush at the beginning of the play was a perfect example why. Lobbing a ball way over Hollister’s head and out of the back of the end zone isn’t going to help his résumé, though.

Rather than taking a double-digit lead in the second quarter, the Seahawks had to settle for a chip-shot field goal to go up 10-3.

1. Jason Garrett coached his way out of a possible upset win over the Patriots

Neither Dallas nor New England could generate much offense on a cold, rainy, and windy afternoon in Foxborough. That weather, combined with the Patriots’ suffocating defense, put a premium on points for Dak Prescott and the Cowboys. And this idea, apparently, terrified Jason Garrett.

Or, in other words:

Jason Garrett is such a chicken shit.

— David Fucillo (@davidfucillo) November 25, 2019

The Cowboys’ head coach opted for a field goal on fourth-and-7 from the Patriots’ 11, cutting a 13-6 New England lead to 13-9 with six minutes to play and reducing Dallas’ burden from needing a touchdown in the final minutes of the game to ... needing a touchdown in the final minutes of the game.

So why not go for it? If they had failed to convert, then the Patriots would’ve gotten the ball deep in their own territory and Dallas could’ve relied on its defense to force a punt.

Instead, the Cowboys didn’t touch the ball again until there was 2:38 left on the clock and they had to start from their own 8-yard line. Dallas’ day came to an unsurprising end when its ensuing drive gained just 17 yards (thanks in part to a questionable tripping call) before a turnover on downs.

Garrett’s decision ensured the Cowboys only lost by four points and not seven. It also left Jerry Jones frustrated. At this rate, maybe Garrett will be coaching the Giants next season after all.

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kendrixtermina · 7 years

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“Can’t help it” - NT conversations

So me (INTP) and my younger sister, whom I affectionately call Sabbel (INTJ) were casuall chatting over WhatsApp, and... it has to be seen to be believed.

(Warning, deliberately inappropiate jokes galore)

INTJ: I see the plants you get as gifts still live

INTP: Yes aren't they cute? The plants I mean My babies 🌵

INTJ:Yes they are cute. Though it's sad that they can't hear you

INTP: 🍄🌾💐🌷🌹🥀🌻🌼🌸🌺🎄🌲🌳🌴🌱 If they can't hear me, they can't think I'm an annoying smartass hermit Besides plants communicate & sense a lot more than they're given credit for Not those plants probably tho But that nice smell of fresh mown grass? That are actually stress response chemicals So they are SCREAMING

INTJ: INTP! HOW DARE YOU They are not animals So they don't scream They do seek help And alert the rest

INTP *quoting GITS 2 “innocence*: "Blessed are those who have a voice"

INTJ: But they don't screem Scewam* Scream* That' s biological appropriation, sis

INTP: But what IS a scream? Is it just a noise? Then how can I DO THIS WITH CAPSLOCK?

INTJ: That's not ok

INTP: Or how can it be saved on a hard disk in a horror movie?

INTJ: Don't just force your human behaviour and habits onto them INTJ: They are not screaming so don't call it that INTJ: That's offensive to plants

INTP: Who says they aen't? The plants?

INTJ: And while they will not take offense that is a really bad excuse INTP: If anything you're speaking for them; INTP: The plants are just saying "Tannins!" INTP: And whatever other molecules they use XD

INTJ: Thats's like giving a blind person the finger and saying they won't notice anhways

INTP: But see thats the point its kinda a philosophical question

INTJ: Saying that they are screaming is usingscreaming as a metaphor to human use them

INTP: If a tree falls down all alone, did it really happem? INTP: (* Im just being derpy right now just ignore me *) INTP: Don't take my silly plant jokes they're ALL I HAVE in my empty meaningless existence

INTJ: Because we can't properly perceive it with our senses we just force the verb of a sense on to it

INTP: its called a METAPHOR stupid

INTJ: Yes

INTP: or expanding the meaning of the word, not forcing the original one INTJ: Metaphors because of convenience

INTP: we all know plants dont literally scream INTP: because... we'd hear it

INTJ: No INTP: except if it as really quiet INTP: or ultrasound

INTJ: Maybe they's do it on a frequency we can't hear

INTP: / different frequencies

but you still get the point INTJ: Sis INTJ: If anything it should be called producing chemicals for help INTJ: Or smelling / stinking for help INTJ: Or well to alarm INTJ: But we use scream

INTP: else we couldnt say that bad things "suck" because they dont liteally suck on anything like our abstract thoughts have long since surpassed our physical reference frames INTP: we can make up shit like inacessible cardinals

INTJ: Because humans don't smell for help but scream for help Even though smell is more accurate

INTP: But a scream is not just sound (or data, or text), it's an expression of something

INTJ: Sis, Things suck because they suck all the fun out of your life

INTP: good one

INTJ: And , occasionaly , your should Soul*

INTP: or drugs dont make you literally float up high

INTJ: Yeah but when we talk about drugs we usually talk about psychotropic ones

INTP: what a word rignally meant matters only for disambiguation purposes - doesn't make sense to talk when you mean different things by it

INTJ: Which make you mentally high / feel lighter m float , high

INTP: but what is "mentally high"? INTJ: Some Like most don't But some do INTP: it has nothing to do with physical high-ness its just a metaphor because we associate high with positve a non bipedal anima would see it all different

INTJ: Sis, I am gonna insist in bs for arguments sake 0Accept it I love common up with ridiculous exagerated arguments INTP: well me to * too INTJ: Big Sis ❤ INTP: we can fight all day about whose bs wins but its an arbitrary deffinitional issue in the end - just like "high", "screams" or math language is a tool its correct use is somewhat dependant on your purpose ppl make new jargon for new puposes all the time obsly there are limits - if only you defne a word one way you're not gonna do much useful communicating but it is a tool also, i heart you too BTW did you know that Dolphins use pufferfish to get high? They even pss them around Pufferbong I just read an article on tumblr

Besides I just realized this "don't call it human things" is such a typical 5w6 thing XD

(I apologize) INTJ: Sis Male dolphins also rape other male dolphines to assert their supremacy So like I'm alpha dolphin you are unde rme in the hierarchy So I will rape you So you feel bad and are afraid of me INTP: Dolphins are horrible people INTJ: Yeah INTP: They also torture tortoises for fun & profit INTJ: Raping stoners INTP: Good thing im not a tortoie OR Dolphin INTP: XD INTJ: The mexicans of the ocean XD

INTJ: I'M SORRY

INTP: *laughing tears emoji* INTJ: I'M SORRY INTJ: # the ocean second INTP: Im doing that emoji IRL right now Don't compare the poor mexicans with those devilish Dolphins It would be far more accurate to compare Dolphins to duck *Ducks INTJ: 🐬🦆 INTJ: But Sis, we already did biology jokes I wanted to mark political jokes Make*

INTP : We are all going to hell XD 😈🔥⚡☄

#intp #intj #analysts #rationals #INTx #mbti

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