#and two 600 word essays. both! due Monday!!!!!!!!

[distance-does-not-matter]

Dear Professor,

I am not doing my two (2) finals on account of, and I quote, “I’m just so done”. In the future, please pick one assignment and have that be it. I also kindly request that you stop leaving students alone and/or in the rain. Finally, it would mean a lot to me if you listened to opinions other than your own. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Penni

[shawmilafanalizae]

Lost and Found (Halloween)

WARNINGS: smut content, mature language.

Part one

"Goddamnit!" Sorry. You're probably wondering why I'm screaming. Well, I'm writing a 10 page essay that is due on monday. And what day is it? Friday. And to make everything even better, its Halloween. I should be dressed in a skanky costume, drinking wine, and dancing. But clearly I'm not doing that. I shove my hands in my hair in frustration. I've been so busy with work and school, I've been completely cutting off the world. It's a terrible habit.

My thoughts get cut off from the doorbell ringing twice. Shit, I forgot that there's probably gonna be kids trick or treating around here. I get up from the kitchen table and shut my laptop. I reach the door and unlock it. But before I get to open it, a figure pushes the door open themselves and slides through. Oh, it's just Taylor, my best friend. She's dressed as a sexy cat and is obviously drunk.

" Where the hell were you?" She slurs her words and almost tips over. I motion towards the kitchen table and say " Studying, duh." I grab her hand and place her on the couch. I walk to the kitchen and pour her a glass of water to sober her up. I also grab some grapes from the fridge and place them onto a plate. With the dishes in hand, I walk back into the living room and set the items down and rub her back. " Why haven't you been answering my calls?" Right as she said that I whipped out my phone and checked the notifications. I had 3 missed calls from her. I emidiatly drop the phone and hug her tightly. " I'm sorry Tay, how did you get here?" I felt terrible for not being able to pick up the phone. " Stop worrying about me, you need to get ready!" Taylor shoes me up the stairs of my lonely condo. Obviously taking the beverage and snack along with us.

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" What about this one?" I say holding up a red, sexy, revealing dress. " Yes! That one will look perfect on you!" Taylor said popping another grape into her mouth. I leap over the pile of dresses me and Tay just went through to get to the closet to change.

Once I'm in the dress I plop myself onto my vanity chair. I quickly do my makeup; a red and gold cut crease, concealer, highlighter, matte red lipstick, I complete the look with devil horns in the middle of my forehead. I pull my hair into an elegant bun with a few curly pieces hanging out to frame my face. I slip on some deep maroon and gold heels. Taylor hands me a gold necklace and bracelet. I spray a bit of perfume and toss my keys to Tay. We both walk down the stairs. Tay tripping every step. We slip out of the condo, slam the door and lock it. Tay has already unlocked the car. I get in and we start our adventure to this party that Tay apparently has already visited.

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We arrive at the address of the Halloween party. I glance at the massive house that had at least 600 people in it. Damn I regret this. As I was getting out of the car, Tay was already half up the driveway. In the front yard was people playing games on the lawn, and drinking bottles of beer. Ugh gross.

Tay and I reach the door and walk in. We are instantly greeted with sweaty bodies, blasting music, and kissing couples. We manage to weave our way through the dancing crowd toward the bar. Once I take a seat on a bar stool, I realize Tay is nowhere in sight. Eh whatever. I take 2 shots of tequila. Then I make my way to the dance floor. After I'm grinding up on this tall stranger, I forget about everything. All I could think about was how my hips swayed and how tightly the man was gripping my hips. The man takes my hand and leads me towards the wine area. He grabs two glasses and pours some sort of raspberry wine into them and hands one to me. I take a quick sip. " What's you're name darling?" He steps into the light and my god. He is a literal God. He has a perfectly chiseled jaw, plump pink lips, and dark curly hair. " Take a picture it'll last longer." He says in a joking manner when he realized I was staring. I quickly snapped out of my sinful thoughts. " Y/N, what's yours?" I asked trying to hide my blushing face by taking a long sip of my wine. " The names Shawn, my sweet." Shawn, what a perfect name for a perfect guy like him. " Do you wanna go somewhere more private so we can talk and get to know each other?" I nodded and he interlocked his fingers with mine and started to pull me to the backyard. I held my wineglass in one hand and Shawn's hand in the other. He quickly pulled us both into a greenhouse. He shut the door and flipped on the light. Shawn took my wine glass out of my hands and set it on the ground next to us. All of a sudden, he pushed me up against the wall. " Can I kiss you?" Holy fuck. He is so hot I'm like melting. " Please do" As soon as I relaxed Shawn's lips latched onto mine and it was like sparks throughout my whole body. I deepened the kiss and he slipped his tongue inside my mouth. He reached up and slightly tugged on my hair. I moaned and this obviously made him want more because he lifted up my long dress and pulled it off of my body. Once the air hit my back and stomach I shivered waiting to see what he would do next. He looked into my eyes and I dropped down to my knees. I slid his black skinny Jean's off of his long, muscular legs. I came back up and kissed him some more. This time I tugged on his hair and he growled so low it made my panties pool. Shawn's hand glided down my body to the band of my panties and his magical fingers found my sensitive, wet clit. I bucked my hips and whimpered wanting more of his touch. " Hold on darling, you need to be patient for me okay?" Ugh he's such a tease. " Uh huh, oh fuck Shawn!" He put his large hand over my mouth to protect me from making loud noises. Shawn stepped put of his boxers while I took off my panties. He swiftly took the underwear out of my hand and threw them towards his pants. " These are mine now, honey." Shawn said afterwards. All I had left was my bra and I was hoping that he would take it off with his hands. And he did just so.

Now that both of you were naked, shawn had somehow gotten a condom. " Lemme do it for you, papi." I said seductively while taking the condom by the tip of my fingers. Shawn growled at the nickname I had given him. I bent down to be faced with his hard on, dripping with precum. " Fuck darling, hurry." Shawn whimpered and begged. I'm not gonna give it to him just yet.

I took his pretty cock into my hands and pumped him. I ripped the foil off the rubber and slid it on his big cock. I came back up to him and leaned against the door waiting for him to fill me up. " Darling, you have me so hard for your sweet pussy." A shot of pleasure went through your body listening to his dirty mouth.

" Are you sure you want to do this baby?" Shawn asked with his eyebrows furrowed. " Yes I want your cock so bad Shawn, please fuck me." I say getting impatient.

" Your wish is my command, honey." And with that he thrust into you at full speed. " Oh my god, Shawn!" He was the best I have ever had already. And I've fucked a few people. Damn he already had you close. " Damnit princess, you're so tight, I love how you feel wrapped around my cock." God you loved his dirty talk. " Oh, papi ugh- I'm close." I didnt want this to end. " Come on princess, cum around my thick cock, be a good girl." There he had it he hit your g-spot and you came undone. " Oh fuck! Shawn!" I moaned loud and tried to ride out my high. " Good girl, honey. Oh shit I'm gonna cum, fuck." You felt hot ribbons of cum fill the condom.

You both just stood there catching your breath until you finally started to put your dress on and fixed your hair. After grabbing your wine, you and Shawn walked out of the greenhouse and back into the party.

Shawn introduced you to his friends after that. You talked and laughed. At the end of the night, Shawn went with you to find Taylor. Once you found her, you introduced Taylor to Shawn. " Taylor, this is Shawn, Shawn this is Taylor." You smiled at Taylor and Shawn as the shook hands. " Hi nice to meet you Shawn!" You guys had pointless, drunk conversations and then you said your goodbyes.

" Bye Shawn!" You went to hig him and whispered into his ear. " Bye,bye papi. Oh and by the way, I'm not wearing any panties." You said to him. " Bye honey. I'm gonna miss you wrapped around me." Me and Shawn swapped numbers and walked away from each other. As I turned around you winked at him. " Hurry, Y/N!" Taylor yelled at you. You ran after Taylor to get into the car.

Once Taylor and I were on the road, we were having conversations that didn't matter. " I can tell you fucked him Y/N."

Oh shit.

" Why the hell would you think that?!" I new my acting was terrible because I were blushing so hard. Who cares she can see right through me.

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Once I reached home, I kicked off my heels. I walked to the kitchen and started the coffee machine,and walked upstairs. Taylor was already crashed in my guest bedroom. I started to get undressed and realized that I forgot my bra in the greenhouse. Shit.

I washed my makeup off, shampooed my hair, conditioned it to, and washed my body. I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my figure. I slipped some gray sweats on and a pink t-shirt.

I went back downstairs to pour myself some coffee. I left my phone here so I checked through instagram and snapchat. Nothing important. I started to sip on my coffee and sat down at the kitchen table. I opened my laptop and went back to work. This being difficult because of Shawn fucking me less than 3 hours ago. Damn I need to see him again. I guess I just felt lost without someone. He's the one who found me. I'm lost and found.

[a-queer-seminarian]

hey there, some seminary questions for you! How did you choose which seminary to attend? Could you please talk about the application/acceptance process? What's the average week like as a seminarian?

Oh gosh, you sent this ages ago, I’ve been meaning to answer!

How I picked a seminary:

I looked only at seminaries in my denomination, PC(USA), that were at least sort of near my area of the USA and that seemed like they’d be LGBT+ friendly. I visited two of them, McCormick in Chicago and Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary, in the fall of 2015 and applied to them both the spring of 2016. Both seemed like excellent choices, I selected LPTS because I liked the housing situation, the campus in general, and the students and teachers I talked to seemed like a better fit for me. And indeed, I am extremely happy here!

Applications and Acceptance:

So yeah, the two seminaries I applied to both had applications due for the following fall in early spring, and I think that’s fairly standard. When looking at various seminaries, check their website for info on that. I highly recommend looking into seminaries a year before you want to attend one, so that you have plenty of time to visit, gather recommendation letters, reflect on your decision, and apply.

Note that the vast majority of seminaries require an undergraduate degree before you can apply, since it is a masters program – but that undergrad degree can be in anything. See this post.

This is the admissions page of my seminary. LPTS offers several degrees, the most popular of which at the masters level are the Masters of Divinity (MDIV, what I am doing) and the Masters of Family Therapy (MFT). To apply to these programs, there are forms that request general info and also ask that you undergo a background check, write some essays, and three letters of recommendation.

The last of those things, the rec letters, might sound overwhelming, but it’s doable. One of them needs to be from a pastor, so if you don’t currently have a pastor in your life who knows you well, that’s something to think about before applying to seminary – how can you get active in your current church so that your pastor can write you a good letter? The second letter must be an academic reference and the third must be a “personal or professional reference” – see this webpage for more. Note that these were the letters my two seminaries of choice required, and while I think it’s fairly typical, other seminaries may do it differently.

I’m pretty sure some sort of interview was required too, but it’s super informal and you can do it via skype if you can’t get to the seminary in person. I do recommend checking out the seminaries you’re interested in person though, if at all possible – they let you tour, talking to various teachers and students and possibly sitting in on classes.

On to the acceptance process: if the two seminaries I looked into are any indication, if you get all the application stuff turned in, you’re very likely to be accepted. The big thing is financial stuff they’ll offer you – the more impressive your application is, the more likely to get academic scholarships. My seminary also had me fill out some forms explaining my financial situation, so that they would know to offer me more financial aid as needed. The amazing thing about my seminary though is that they offer full tuition to everyone who gets in! And all seminaries as far as I know are pretty great about helping with financing their students’ education. See this post for more on financial stuff.

An average week in seminary:

Okay, the average week at any seminary is likely to be different. Note also that I’m going to describe the average week of a first-year student – it changes for second and third year students.

Oh yeah, to mention that: at my seminary at least, the MDIV takes three years and the MFT program takes five. You can also be a part time student which means it’ll take longer. For MDIVs, you have to take Hebrew and Greek and you also have to intern for a year at a nearby church to graduate. I’m doing my church placement my second year. And if you are pursuing ordination, you likely want to be working on whatever your denomination requires for ordination while you’re at seminary – you don’t magically get your ordination when you graduate, just your masters. For my denomination, for instance, I have to do some work as a chaplain in order to be ordained, so I’m likely doing that next summer.

Let’s start with classes and homework in an average week:

I take four classes, and workload-wise they remind me a lot of undergrad. Most classes meet either two or three times a week, and are either 50 minutes or an hour and 15 minutes each time. Some classes are primarily lecture, most involve lecture and discussion, and some are primarily discussion. They all involve a lot of reading. Many students get away with not always doing all the readings though, haha. Fall (September through mid-December) and spring (February through early May) are the main two semesters, but there are also short classes available in January and summer.

Along with reading, homework varies; I’ll describe my typical homework for my four current classes:

For Black Church Studies, we basically read one book and have one 1000-word essay due every two weeks.

Scripture II (New Testament) is sort of bizarre in that there are no major essays due and we only have one textbook (well, plus the Bible). Homework is to read a chapter of the textbook and write a 300-600 word summary on it for each class meeting. Each chapter is on a different book / letter of the New Testament. For this coming Monday, my summary on Ephesians is due. (On a side note, at the end of this semester I’ll probably share a google doc of all my summaries if anyone is interested; they’re good for quick overviews of the content and contexts of the Gospels and letters!)

History of Christian Experience I (the first century CE through 1453) has us write three 1200-1400 word essays throughout the semester. For each class meeting, a fifty-word sentence answering a question about the reading is due. This class has the heaviest reading load – seriously, some nights I don’t actually get to read everything thoroughly; I try my best to, but every now and then I have to skim instead.

Hebrew Exegesis (my fave!!) has five papers throughout the semester (that counts the final). For each paper, we translate a short passage from the Hebrew Bible (Old Testament) and provide historical context, talk about literary structure, do word studies on it, and so on. There were also several (6 I think) translation exercises due throughout the semester, in which you have to translate around 10 sentences from Hebrew. This class also involves reading, but not as much as the other classes. You have to read commentaries and look through dictionaries in order to write the papers.

I had a good number of quizzes and some tests for basically every class last semester; this semester, I have literally zero tests or quizzes in any class, just a lot of papers (all my finals this time around are take-home essays).

It’s hard for me to really explain how fun the classes are? but I love them. They teach so much, and challenge you to think.

Moving on to worship at seminary:

We open every class meeting with a prayer. And on Thursdays and Fridays, there are chapel services led by either a teacher or a student (usually seniors). Because so many different people lead the services, you get a really wide variety of services, which I think is really cool! Not only Presbyterians attend this seminary – in fact, I think it’s something like 50 or 60% of students and faculty here are not Presbyterian. I love seeing how different traditions worship.

And community life here:

Classes are small and therefore tight-knit. I love my class; there are around 30 of us in total I think and around 20 of those are MDIV like me. We all joke around and support and pray for each other, and study together and help one another out when needed. When you need anything, whether it’s notes from a class you missed or a ride to the airport or some groceries because you’re low on cash, someone will help you out.

There are so many groups on campus you can join. We’ve got students in governmental positions, for instance, and students in various committees, from the Faith Life committee to the More Light (LGBT) committee, and from the Worship committee to the Gender and Ministry committee. I do a lot to help out with the community garden. There’s also a grassroots group for environmental stuff – I am assigned to take out the recycling in one of the school buildings to do my part with that. My seminary’s “big thing” is racial dialogue, so there are many classes, workshops, and other events that deal with that. Unfortunately the More Light group isn’t all that active this year, but when there are events I go to them!

If there’s an issue you care about that is not already addressed by a group on campus, it’s possible to make it happen. I just gave a workshop on how to make ministry more welcoming to transgender people. And a classmate and I plan to hold some workshop type events on accessibility and ableism this coming fall.

Conclusion:

So yeah, life in seminary involves balancing schoolwork with participating in the seminary community, your own life (many students here have jobs and/or kids), worship / your faith life, and doing the “field ed” aspect of seminary – church placements and chaplaincy for MDIVs, counseling/therapy for MFTs.

I personally find myself exhausted pretty often thanks to the ol’ mental illness and neurodivergence, so it’s important to take care of yourself. Teachers for the most part are very understanding and willing to give extensions on papers and the like, so that helps. And like I said, when you need something, classmates have your back.

I cannot emphasize enough how enriching the classes are, how intelligent the teachers are, or how warm and family-like the students are. It’s all wonderful.

If you have more questions about seminary, let me know!