#anyway this is my canon

[commanddead]

Commander Shepard was indoctrinated during mass effect 2, this is how it played in to mass effect 3.

 After having to board the presumed dead reaper ship to obtain the IFF, the indoctrination of Shepard began. The reapers had a plan with her; to use her just as they’d tried to use Saren. Except this time, they wanted to keep it as subtle as possible; make it so she wouldn’t even realize she was indoctrinated. It would be a long, lengthy process, but one that would play off nonetheless. The little boy Shepard saw on earth, the one that haunts her dreams— he never existed. The boy was a fragment of Shepard’s imagination, a hallucination she witnessed as a result of the beginning indoctrination. That is the reason Anderson didn’t hear or see the little boy when Shepard was speaking to him, or how the alliance soldiers piling everyone in to vehicles seemed to just ignore him as he climbed in unassisted. This child serves as a symbol for all the people Shepard couldn’t save over her years of service; those on Elysium who were lost, the lost squadmate left behind on Virmire, Mordin when he’d sacrificed himself for the cure, and Thane, who’d died after the Citadel Coup. That is why she hears their voices when she sleeps, constantly running in a dark forest with no real direction to symbolize herself going deeper and deeper in to losing herself. Nonetheless she keeps her resolve, she keeps the same goal up until the end, when they finally reach Earth. This is when Shepard becomes plagued with headaches; she blames it on stress, choosing to instead focus on saying her goodbyes, acknowledging many of her loved ones and friends-turned-family may not come out of this alive. Still, she puts up a good fight, all the way to the end; when she is hit by the reaper beam.It is Shepard’s Cerberus implants that hold her together, the reason she survives the beam and is drawn to the beacon to “ complete her mission . “ Shepard is pulled in to the beam of the beacon and launched to the area of the citadel where the catalyst must be activated. The entire encounter with Anderson and The Illusive man— was all in her head. In fact, Anderson had died along with many others before Shepard had been summoned to the Citadel. Every step towards the Catalyst, every sharp breath, every thought, sent a jolt of pain throughout her body. The fight between Anderson and the Illusive man, having to bare witness to Anderson dying, this was supposed to be the final straw of weakening her mentally before completing the indoctrination process. Before she can activate the crucible, Shepard passes out. Everything beyond this point is a dream. But, not just any dream; one meant to stall Shepard long enough for the final push of the invasion to take place. The little boy figure who’d previously “died” on earth, the reason he couldn’t tell Shepard anything, couldn’t answer any of her questions; he only knew as much as she did, or if he knew more, he didn’t want to waste time informing her. Here she is faced with three options, all three different but nonetheless containing the same outcome; the end of the reapers. In reality, what she does in this stasis like dream would have no effect on the real world. Well, it would have worked out according to plan, if not for Shepard’s resolve and need to save the galaxy being so strong. Instead she is called by a faint familiar voice, in the opposite direction of the catalyst boy, and as she walks towards the voice she wakes up, propped against the wall inside the citadel, alone. She hears admiral Hackett’s voice buzzing in her ear, the sound that had drawn her out of her stasis dream, calling out as a final plea for a miracle to cause the catalyst to fire.Despite the ringing of the reapers in her ears she drags herself to the control panel, through blurry vision trying every button until she seems to get the right order and triggers an ear-piercing explosion. After this she falls unconscious, later to be found lying in the barely intact remains of the citadel station, which starts Miranda Lawson’s goal to restore Shepard back to health, and what triggers the release of Shepard from indoctrination. 

[codesworn-blog]

tfw no one is gonna want to write chris’ mom but you want an au where she faked her death probably to escape gerard and has been trying to watch over her babies and stop kate for years and she comes back in like season 6 to take down gerard and his weak new “hunters” who are so shit and basic she’s like ‘okay enough nonsense time to kill the ex’