#anyway uhhh sorry if this doesn't make sense i never try to share my headcanons or thoughts anywhere that isn't in a discord conversation

[lesbianbatlucille]

thinking about negans first deadly interaction with a walker..

he was outside their home trying to get the generator up and running after the power went out, and a walker grabs him from behind while lucille was keeping watch. while it's trying to bite his arms and neck lucille rushes up behind it and whacks it in the head with a frying pan and she's so spooked she keeps hitting it when it's down. negan has to drag her away and comfort her, trying to wipe the blood off of her face while she's hyperventilating.

when they get back inside she's convinced that she just killed a person and negan thinks that she did aswell... but he doesn't say it and instead he tries to make her feel better by saying that they were sick and violent and she did the right thing.

Thinking about a conversation a few days after this where she’s like "I fucked up. You either hate me or you should." And he’s so dead serious about "No I could never, you Did The Right Thing"

and now thinking about an au where she lived but they got separated, and they're together again for the first time in months/years and she starts seeing through the cracks how deranged he is and remembers that conversation...And feels sick about it..