#apostrophes were lost making the post twt compatible the funeral is at 11

[zaxal]

'you don't dance' is ruining my life

either 1) crowley asked him and aziraphale went 'of course i dont dance, im an angel' then learned to dance when he and crowley werent talking or 2) crowley made an assumption abt aziraphale while aziraphale has been wanting to be asked for centuries

bc thats what they DO, thats how their relationship works, crowley offers something, aziraphale pulls back, crowley offers again in slightly less polarizing terms, aziraphale accepts

except aziraphale is finally to the point that hes ready to start asking, to start taking the lead, and hes being so bold about it. the existence we carved out for ourselves. our car. the bookshop that's only technically mine, we both get plenty of use out of it. while we dance.

hes just not saying The Words bc The Words are hard. their entire relationship has been this familiar push and pull, things left unsaid and assumptions made, for better or worse. also crowley has, historically, been hostile to the words aziraphale uses for him

bc theyre not the right ones. crowley doesnt want to be told that hes nice and kind in general terms. crowley doesnt want the plausible deniability even when it's something they still need to hide behind. he wants something personal, something intimate, for it to mean something

crowley, the one who fumbles and stammers and makes inarticulate noises, mx ngk, is the one who needs a solid foundation laid for him

while aziraphale who worships books is willing to live in ambiguity, to leave the things unsaid, bc words can be false, but theyll know the truth

theyre just so narrowly missing each other and by the time both of them find it in them to say The Words, it's too late. there are no less polarizing terms that can be accepted for either of them, so when they pull away, it feels like they cant come back