#artists when 3/4th angle facing left <- me forever

[jichanxo]

sensei scribbles

[nicolinocolino]

Marti x Nico fic rec list

Inspired by: 1) the ask I got requesting nicotino fic recs 2) the lack of fic rec posts in this fandom and 3) my own procrastination

my personal favorites are marked with a ★

explicit fics are marked (E)

and incomplete chaptered fics are marked with ✐

canon-compliant/divergent & post-canon & slice of life

Martinese by ginnyred ★ summary: Nico has always been fairly good at languages.

Londra A/R by ginnyred ★ summary: i miss you already. Or, Marti leaves on a four-day school trip to London.

tre giorni by akmongs ★ summary: "I think this summer is going to be good." Snippets of Marti and Nico's life over three days.

maybe... by Princess_sized summary: Hi! I didn’t like the idea of Marti being so upset after the fundraiser and not seeing any kind of resolution for him so... here ya go! Ele’s POV because it’s her season, of course.

Matched by ginnyred summary: When Marti told him the five-a-side football tournament began in two weeks, Nico smiled gently and said: “That's great. Is Chinese okay for dinner?” With hindsight, he might have underestimated the whole thing a little bit.

tell me what you need by crucios (E) summary: There's something a little off-kilter tonight that Marti can't pinpoint. Nico's smile doesn't quite reach his eyes and there's a strained and anxious sort of energy thrumming through him. Like it's just under the surface of his skin but hasn't quite broken through.

quicken the heart by crucios summary: The words come spilling out a bit like a cup clumsily overflowing. Marti can feel his cheeks heat up a little. It's not even that he's embarrassed. Not really. It's Nico. He can tell Nico anything. It's just... a strange thing to hear himself say. Before Nico he had never properly imagined that he would ever be this intimate with someone—intimate enough to be able to have conversations like this.

clean breaks by ladyballs_and_manboobs summary: Mamma Rametta angst or Nicotino angst? Why not both!

let me face hurricanes by ladyballs_and_manboobs summary: Martino's courage is tested.

he ain't heavy by ladyballs_and_manboobs summary: Chapter 1: Gio reflects on Marti's confession (Episode 6) Chapter 2: Gio becomes the Love Magician (Episode 7) Chapter 3: Gio gets to know Marti's boyfriend better (Episode 8) Chapter 4: Gio takes care of his boys after the fight (S3)

Old Flames by claudinedelyon summary: Through sheer bad luck, Martino never receives Nico's post-its or the antidote. The next time they see each other, ten years have passed and they are back in very familiar territory.

don't know where you start, and where i begin by akmongs (E) summary: Marti thinks another reason why they have anticipated this trip so much is this. Having a hotel room to themselves for five nights. No one else's schedule dictating how much time they have. No one interrupting them. No biting his hand to keep quiet when Nico slips a hand in his boxers while his mom is sleeping next door. Just the two of them, alone in a room with a double bed and what feels like endless hours to spend wrapped in each other.

Forget The World Outside by givemesumaurgravy summary: “Stay with me,” Niccolò says, and it’s not so much a question as a request, one that Martino could never deny him. Martino would stay forever if Niccolò let him. Or, what happens after the pool kiss scene.

Buttons by Princess_sized summary: “I know it sounds crazy, but I never meant to hurt you.” Or, Marti starts wearing his shirts buttoned all the way up sometime between the end of their 3rd year and the start of 4th. This is why.

pda (private displays of affection) by lamourestout summary: s3 ep2 missing scene (except not really since it's not marti's season anymore) but after nico whispered to marti and they left while ele and eva were talking aka making out in edoardo incanti's guest bedroom because they're very in love with each other

Unforgivable by ginnyred summary: There is a moment, it lasts maybe a couple of seconds, in which Marti wonders if Nico has been listening to him at all. But then Nico looks at him. Really, really looks at him and Marti knows he knows. “What is it that you're ashamed of?” Nico asks, kind but resolute. He kisses his forehead and holds Marti's face in his hands. “Betraying your friend's trust? Or the feelings you had for him?” Marti tells Gio, but first he tells Nico.

alternate universe:

Nico the fitness trainer AU by ladyballs_and_manboobs ★ ✐ summary: Martino has to take pilates classes with the girls after losing a bet to Elia. It doesn't turn out as bad as he feared.

For art's sake by ginnyred ★ summary: Being an art critic, Marti thought he knew what posh artists were like. Not bothering to show up at one's own art opening has got to be a new low, though.

focal point by GiuliaMed ★ summary: Finding new friends is Niccolò's priority after changing schools, but somewhere along the line, one of the four boys he meets becomes more important. Snapshots of Nico slowly falling in love.

Mezzo Forte by silver_etoile summary: Martino knows falling for a straight guy is bad news, but his heart just doesn't seem to listen.

but nothing ever stops you leaving by akmongs (E) summary: Nico moves to Milan after university. Marti doesn't cope as well as he thought he would. Over a month since they last saw each other, he decides to book a train and surprise him.

Threading the Needle by claudinedelyon summary: Anybody who has so much as met Martino could probably tell fashion is not his biggest passion in life. But he has rent and bills to pay so he will happily take the position offered by Brava, a small but growing clothing company. The fact that the job turns out not as crappy as he feared and that the people working there welcome him with open arms, those are all perks that just make his life easier. And the presence of one dark-haired designer who seems to draw great amusement from his lack of knowledge or interest in the company's line of business, well, it's something else entirely.

Do you Feel a Comma in your Heart? by claudinedelyon summary: Martino is a professional, somewhat experienced, translator. He's worked with all kinds of proofers before, and it's mostly gone well. And then, he's introduced to the new proofer who is working with him on his latest project and has got green eyes, an infectious smile and opinions on the proper use of commas.

Io non ci credo, alle giraffe by Akira14 ✐ summary: Once upon a time, there was a boy who couldn’t sleep. This is the story of his quest for a cure, for the song of a wounded soul and the tears of a mythical creature. And what if he finds love, along the way? Love... Everybody seems so obsessed with that, but Martino had seen with his own eyes how dangerous, how painful, it was to fall for someone and he would rather avoid it. Will he?

Bewitched by ginnyred summary: Marti looks down at himself. Long, lean pianist fingers that are not his at all. He's swimming in his blue t-shirt, suddenly a lot slimmer. He puts his hands in his hair and it's weird because the feeling is familiar, but the angle is wrong. He touches his face, the long line of his nose, his jaw and prominent cheekbones. “What the fuck?” he whispers, looking up again, and his own voice startles him with how deep it is. “I'm you!”

———

PLEASE ADD TO THIS WITH ITALIAN FICS I BEG OF Y’ALL

[wildflower8281]

Am I a Gypsy?

Today I sat down at a periwinkle wooden table with lime green cushioney chairs and journaled out how I want my life to look and feel for the next few years. All of the realms of it - feelings, body, home, work, friends, lovers, leisure. I’m currently house & pet sitting in a beautiful home in Scottsdale, with a huge pool, spacious, bright interiors and the sweetest, shaggy dog you’ll ever meet, Murray. It feels like a rather large Airbnb experience to me and has given my mind a place to rest and a bit of a vacay vibe, which is welcome after a few weeks of transition and seeking some new work opportunities.

So here I am: Age 37 and in a place in my life, yet again, where I can totally recreate my world in a new way. I’ve done this a few times already in my life and I look at it as a gift each time, albeit not always arriving when Kelly feels ready, or in the way Kelly thinks it might arrive, but a gift nonetheless - a space in time where I shed a version of myself that is no longer and step into something new, yet at the same time, is still fundamentally me.

(Photo: Current View, #house-sittinglife)

Past and Present

To give some perspective, 10 years ago, Summer 2009, I was halfway into a 4 year stint as a missionary nun in East Harlem, having 5 years of convent life under my belt. I spent a good part of that summer in Guyana, in S. America, living the adventure, sleeping under a mosquito net, driving on the left side of the road and boating down the river to visit remote communities. We organized a girls summer camp, bathed in the river twice a day and slept in tents for 2 weeks. It was pretty awesome honestly. Guyana and Harlem were both vibrant communities, with beautiful people and so many lessons. And yet, that life - as a religious sister - was not one I wanted to live for the rest of mine, so in 2011, I walked and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

(Photo: Bright Lights of Guyana, 2009)

So, when I say I’ve been here before, in this space of recreating my life and who I want to be in this world, I most definitely have been and returning home from the convent was one of those moments. At age 30, I came home from religious life with a few-inches-past-buzzed hair situation, 1 pair of sports pants, a few t-shirts, sneakers and sandals much too worn. For the past 8 years, my identity had been Sister Lumen (and/or Madre Lumen, at least in Harlem)....Now, I had to re-take-up my birth name and being of KellySue...Who the heck is that and what is she like at age 30 out here in this new world where people curse, read magazines and don’t ask permission for things?!

Holy Fucking Shit! (I wrote that honestly prior to realizing the amazing irony of the phrase...needless to say, I’ve come a long way.) Yea, the journey back into ‘the world’ is pretty fantastic actually, even though it’s laced here and there with some tears and fears. Everything from shopping for clothes, applying to jobs, making friends and, gasp, dating is like navigating uncharted waters when you haven’t even really been trained in how to sail. I have an entire post dedicated to “Things They Don’t Tell You When You Leave” here if you’d like to walk through the details: 15 Things They Don't Tell You When You Leave the Convent

So, post-convent I was faced with creating not only a new life in pragmatic ways, but truly a new identity. Or more accurately, finding the original one! So, while I dabbled in teaching and other cool gigs, flitted around with a few cool folks and loved a magical man from Brooklyn, the most important thing I “did” in New Jersey was find KellySue. And it was with that Found-Self that I boarded a 1-way flight to Arizona and knew in my gut the bright, mystical southwest would be my next home, and in many ways my first home - a space and life that I had created from the ground up, from the desires and images in my heart, to the colors that hang on my walls, the geeks and artists I spent my time with and the friends and lovers who have traversed my life here.

(Photo: Essequibo River, Guyana where we camped & bathed for 2 weeks)

And yet today, about 3.5 years into my Phoenix stint, I sit here at this table that 

is not mine, before Life Herself yet again. I have moved on from the Art Center, my first landing and family community here (aside from my real family of course,) a place that held me as I grew and challenged me to thrive. I rent The Dollhouse (a fabulous casita snuggled in the backyard of the main house, in the eclectic hood of #Coronado) and love her very much, but have very few possessions - no car, the bike I ride is not mine, no large appliances. I have clothes, a phone and my laptop. I have a great mattress, 1 dresser, 1 couch, 2 pretty teal chairs and a table from #Target. My smaller tables & most art supplies are from my Aunt, my dishes are from #Goodwillphx, as are mostly everything of decorative purpose. I don’t own many books by choice and prefer the #phxpubliclibrary. Even though I’ve curated my space lovingly and it most definitely echoes my vibe of colorful, bright and cozy - none of it is stuff that anchors me in this city. If someone offered me a job or to house-sit for a few months in Spain or Belize or pretty much anywhere new to me, I’d be off in a heartbeat!

(Photo: Unsplash)

That Time on Mt. Washington

So, today I sit here and ask myself, “Kelly, what do you want in your life?” I dedicate 1 page per theme: Feelings, Home, Work, Friends, Leisure, Lover. And I feel and write, imagine and think. And it crosses my mind more than once that not many people have this luxury. Well, I consider it a luxury! Perhaps some would consider it frightening or some other adjective, who knows?! To be 37, no kids, no pets, no house, no partner (3 out of 4 are very intentional...the 4th is seasonal, lol!) To sit at a table and draft & craft some Life up for the next 3-5-10 years or so. To be open to all the opportunities the Universe offers me, to list and discern and choose things I desire, experiences I want, types of people and energy I seek to feel. To me, this is luxury.

But this moment of vision and serenity hasn’t come without some unrest and many months of annoyance! It’s been a long journey to arrive to this table, to my journal, to feeling calm and open to the Universe’s next plans for me. Read on...

This arises in me every few years now, since I’ve been home. I feel like I’ve landed, I settle in, get cozy and then, kinda little by little, but eventually all of the sudden I look around where I am and my eyes grow wide….

I pause, really look around, almost squinting to make sure, like, “No, it can’t be. Not yet. Not already…” That takes a good 3-4 months.

Then, I sigh and look around again, really feel into the energy of the space I’m in in my life and interiorly nod my head, as I think, “Uh-huh, yep...Alli esta….There it is...Ha llegado la hora…..It’s time.” This phase lasts another 1-2 months….

I think on it, ponder it, hold that feeling between my fingers, feel the texture of it and ask Life, “Really?! Again?! Already?!”

And, as I’m examining this situation from all angles in fits and starts, Life leads me (kicks, shoves me) right out the door because It Is fucking time, Kelly!

She ushers me into a brand new space (in all the senses) and opens the Doors of this new space so wide that the bright light actually hurts at first glance…

Like some aching pain, squinting, not seeing quite clearly, some fear, uncertainty, wanting to turn around and run back to where it’s darker, but familiar and I’m good at the stuff back there….

One thing the convent teaches you is humility….for better or worse, ha (#chapteroffaults.) It is a good virtue to possess and it has been a tool I have wielded in these moments in my life many times, a trusty friend if used wisely and, seemingly ironically, with confidence. Because humility allows me to be a novice each time, to be Ever-the-Learner, to be always open to the new. Humility allows me to be ok with not knowing everything, to be ok with being the new girl yet again, to be ok with waking up for weeks on end not knowing where you’re going to land, but trusting that you will, indeed, land, and land amazingly well because that’s what you do! Because ultimately, humility is not just relying on myself. It’s Me & The Universe. It’s trusting the shove out the door and believing the blinding light will one day actually clearly guide your path onto your next adventure and into a fuller version of yourself. Humility is like that time we (the nuns) hiked down Mt. Washington as the sun was setting, lead by only a flashlight, in the dark, wet forest, holding hands and trusting that if the sister in front of you landed her step safely, then the tiny light was all you also only needed to land safely. Humility allows for the one small step at a time, even if you don’t see the end or full picture yet, you know the Universe is showing you what you need in the moment you need it….

Also, Nature Herself is Humble, so there’s that….

Trees thrive where they’re planted.

Flowers are brilliantly radiant, yet silent.

The Ocean ebbs and flows forever without fanfare.

Birds unknowingly bring joy with their songs.

Mountains rise in splendor and ask no glory.

Gypsy Secrets

For someone who left the missionary life proper, who considers herself a homebody and most definitely a lover of the reliable routine, I find it funny that in the grand scheme of things, I actually move through life quite like a #gypsy! I’ve always been someone who leads with simplicity and doesn’t need many material items to feel happy, and I have never set an anchor in a place so deep that it forfeited my freedom to roam - a desire I’m learning is an essential part of my being. It’s a paradox of myself that I find really interesting. I will be the most reliable worker, on top of all my shit, I will work out faithfully and read daily, I eat the same things most days because I like them….and yet, every 4 years or so I will hop on a plane, take of my habit, walk out of a job and just fling myself into the Universe in this kind of radical, unconventional way (‘You’re leaving your job and you don’t have the next one lined up?!’….I’ve done this now 3x in my life quite successfully thankyouverymuch!) only to be explained by a feeling inside of me that I can no longer ignore. Or, more accurately, that no longer lets me ignore it. And so I go, I leave, I move, I reconsider, I recast dreams, I open, I sigh alot...I take that one clear step and then breathe, wondering what the next version of myself and my life will taste and feel like, grateful for the adventure and most importantly, knowing that “home” is not a place, but rather is within me, the liberating secret that every true #gypsy lives by.