opens-up-4-nobody · 11 months ago
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#the problem with a mood profile that is mostly way down with peaks of way up is that when u return to a state of: the bullshit is easy.#i dont need to sleep. i could run around in circles. i could read a million papers. what kind of loser cant manage their life?#u r like: God fucking dammit i fucked up so much stuff. y tf didnt i do yhis at the time???? its so baffling like i went from fuck just let#me sleep forever to agitated and full of evil energy to like: ok im normal im gonna do the extraction ive been putting off for months#y couldnt i have been like this last week when i should have gathered a list of my failing students to the prof to make them withdrawal?#like y tf didnt i do that?????? i mean. its kind of a suspect way to run a class tbh bc u r artificially inflating ur score#but i could have saved like 6 ppl from an F. but i mean if u r struggling its sort of on u to reach out for help.#ugh. ive not been very good at my job this semester. but to b fair my brain has been trying very hard to kill me#genuinely i had to fill out a safety sheet in therapy and then go to a ta meeting where they were like: how r yall doing#? how do u feel abt the semester? and im just like aaaaaaaAAAaaaa 🙃#next semester i think im TAing for an online course. and im hoping its not bc i was so terrible they had to distance me from students lol#i mean. thats probably just me being paranoid but idk well see monday when i ask when the prof wants to meet before next semester#ay. its been a rougher semester than id hoped.#unrelated
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