#barled

[jangmi-latte]

TELELET 📞📳📞TELELET📞📳📞CAN I HALP U?👀🧐😈TELELET📞📳📞TELELET📞📳📞 BORK🐶🐶BORK🐶🐶BORK🐶🐶AYAYAY🎶🎶 AYM🤭🤪 YOR LITOL😝😍😍BATIRPLAY🦋🦋AYAYAY🎶🎶🎶AYM😅😅🤩YOR LITOL😘😘😍BATERPLAY🦋🦋AYAYAY🎶🎶AYM🤩😅🤩YOR LITOL😍🤩😍 BATIRPLAY🦋 call me old fashioned, but i was born to serve vil. i do the laundry, cook dinner, clean dishes. i live to serve & carry out every demand of his on the slightest whim, its what i was put on this earth to do. if he cheats on me then its my fault! he caught me slipping. *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the mouth uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~ Wheeeee! Oinka oinka! Haaaaaaheeee! A- whooooga A-whoooooga! Aaaaaargh! Hneeeeeeeee! Fnrgh! Grunt grunt! Hinggggg! Whazzo! Boink jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely.

[solarstices]

half coloured sketch page + new Hypnos design because he wasn't tired and traumatised-looking enough

The super sonic looking mf (/aff) belongs to @a-paper-fan15

[conspicuous-clown-car]

i wanna kiss his teeth i wanna make out with his flat face

[kitkabam]

I am a simple woman. I hear Solas speak elven, and I become no better than a dog.

[briancocksofficial]

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BARLES BINGUS BOG BAND, PART 2

What is it? 

It's a bog-themed concept album that's been gently dipped in the idea of jazz, and an accompanying murder (maybe!) mystery short story which was accidentally dropped in the jazz and has been soaking in it for several hours now.

Who is it for? 

Those who like their music genres ill-defined, enjoyers of bad puns on a somewhat niche subject, and ones who have a taste for silly stories with accompanying experimental music.

Why would you make this? 

I was compelled to, by no one in particular.

What about the frogs?

What frogs? I don't see any frogs. Stop asking about the frogs.

Why are you so defensive about the frogs?

I'm not defensive. There are no frogs in my vicinity, and I have not been writing an album while locked in a room with hundreds of them for several months.

Several months? What have you been eating?

They made me soup. Do not ask who "they" are.

Was the soup good?

Yes, it was. Thanks for asking.

And the album?

That remains to be seen.

Where can I get it?

You can find it for free on my website or on Bandcamp. If you want a plot-free listening experience, it's also available to stream on Spotify and other major streaming services.

Can I meet the frogs?

Please don't ask any more questions. I just want to see my family again.

[kostastsimikas]

nunez v newcastle

[skullssy]

Very normal rn

[bizlybebo]

i miss vyncent sol btw guys 😁👍

[sezja]

Every time there's a religion* built around a central Martyr and we later find out - via lore, prequels, word of mouth, etc. - that the martyr in question would not have liked the resulting religion and would be horrified by the things done in their name? That's my shit. Love that shit.

*for discourse purposes, fictional religions.

[hourly-pierce-the-veil]

[wanderersbell]

NO BC SAME I LOVE THE FUCKIN ROBOT'S LEGS SM I MIGHT JUST WRITE SOME NSFW OF EM

Anyways here's the Scara(Harbinger) NSFW as promised~

As always, GN!Reader, reader is dom! No genitals mentioned for reader~!

Content warnins: Public place(a forest but noone's around), markin(Scara recievin), edging(Scara recievin), slight degradation if you squint(Scara recievin), dry humpin(Scara recievin, mentioned briefly at the end that reader recieves it too), reader has a God complex if u squint.

Scaramouche wasn't used to soft, loving touches, he would often flinch at your gentleness, moving away before stopping as he noticed you falter, thinking that your affections weren't welcomed, at that he would grow closer once more, turning his head away and using his large hat to conceal his expression.

That's when you continued, soft caresses to his hair and cheeks, loving oh so loving words that only he was allowed to hear, praises that would make even Gods drop to their knees in weakness and adoration. The Balladeer could only try and fail to hide his reddening face and neck under his hat. You let him have it his way, for a bit.

You'd both been sitting on the ground, resting under the shade of a tree as per your request since he oh so kindly refused to let you take a break from the scorching sun under his hat. It had only been a few minutes since you moved to sit atop his lap, facing him as you started an impromptu affection session, as regular the Harbinger hid himself under his hat, that is until you snatched it and placed it on the grass besides him. The jellyfish cut boy was left a sputtering mess and you cut down his incoming embarrassed tantrum by kissing his lips. It was a short peck but as you pulled away you saw him chase after your lips so you dipped in once more, this time a deeper kiss, slow and passionate, threatening to steal his breath away despite his lack of need for oxygen.

It was only when you heard a small, trembling whine slip past his lips that you pulled away, taking a moment to catch your own breath you admire the mess you quickly made out of the 6th. When you saw his eyes come back to focus on your being you dove back for another kiss, only this time you aimed at his jawline, you heard Scaramouche's breath hitch as you lowered a trail of kisses down to his nonexistent pulse, he flinched, tensed and then shivered as you licked the zone before biting it and finally sucking on it, his eyes fluttered closed as he leaned back on the tree and moved his head up to allow you more space, space which you greedily took as you littered his neck in love bites and hickeys, all where you knew he wouldn't be able to hide them. You always enjoyed the way the Fatui would stare at any and all marks you left on him, even Harbingers would whisper amongst eachother. You were snapped back to reality when you heard another whine come from him, then you noticed his heavy breathing, almost panting, the way he let out a mix between breathy and pleased sighs and whines that bordered a tad bit too close on moans.

You ran your hands across his indigo locks, lowering them to the back of his neck, then to his spine and finally you rested them on his waist, keeping a firm grip of them as you gave him an ocassional squeeze.

This continued on for a coulple of minutes, The Balladeer growing more and more restless by the second, his breathy sighs now full on moans and his whines and whimpers now pleas. One particular time that he squirmed you ended up sitting right on his groin, halting for just a second as you felt his clothed erection poke you. Letting out a small chuckle you bit down harsh enough to draw blood and he screamed, not in pain, but in pleasure, to make it worse for the Harbinger you had decided to start slowly but deeply grinding on his hard on, thing that was driving him insane as it was nowhere near enough to make him reach his peak.

Without a warning you pulled away from his neck with a wet, loud pop, you gave a few more grinds, making sure they were deeper, quicker, that they drove him to the edge and just as he was about to fall into the pleasure he'd been so desperately chasing, you stood up grabbing his hat and putting it back where it belonged on his head. The Balladeer had his eyes closed still, humping the air for a coulple of seconds before realizing and opening his eyes only to see you grabbing your stuff and getting ready to continue your travels with him.

"H-Huh? Hey w-where do you think you're going?!" Scaramouche asked with an equally embarrassed, irritated and desperate tone, "Finish what you started!"

You could only look back at him and giggle, "I didn't start anything, you did! Besides we're on a time crunch~!"

The Balladeer spent the rest of the mission on a worse mood than ever but it was all worth it for as soon as you two got back home, back to his private quarters, he crumbled, begging you with tears in his eyes as he humped you like a bitch in heat. He insisted that he needed you, he prayed that you finally had mercy on him, that he'd worship you if you just let him finish this one time.

And you knew he would, so you did.

THIS IS SO??? OMFG-

bless your soul for this goddamn 🛐 edging scara >>>>> he is so needy i am once again thinking abt spoiling him i am actually unwell because of this i’m gonna be thinking abt this all day crow u are a godsend

[micechicken]

And he's thinking of fantastic things I'm sure

[dreamupdates]

DEEAM POSTED ON HIS SNAPCHAT!

[mtg-cards-hourly]

Barl's Cage

Artist: Tom Wänerstrand TCG Player Link Scryfall Link EDHREC Link

[trashcanalienist]

[briancocksofficial]

the st. peatersburg lawnmower ensemble brings you a beautiful rendition of a bog band classic