#becomes Jessica rabbit. becomes karate kid. becomes Batman.
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i LOVE vaurien scapegrace btw. best zombie king ever
#who is doing it like him he’s been the killer supreme. who has never actually killed someone. presumably he’s been around since The War#so. in all the time he did not manage to kill one person which seemed to have been a goal of his.#they were right inmortality do make procrastination worse#and then. this hundred year old loser looking a middle aged loser gets the shit kicked out of by a 12 year old.#can’t even manage to throw a punch. he’s a wet little dog#tries to join a super villain club. gets killed by his own crew bc they useless what a useless windbag he is.#zombie phase. he’s a shit zombie. tries to recruit as heterosexually as possible but ends up marrying Some Guy called Gerald#who he christens thrasher#loses control of his zombie horde. is shit at speeches. gets dommed by necromancers. loses his body. is a head in a jar.#all the whole oblivious to his colossally homosexual behaviour with thrasher. boy he drove you around in an ice cream truck. gay#becomes Jessica rabbit. becomes karate kid. becomes Batman.#ends up saving the world bc he finally realizes he loves thrasher. love wins#he’s just. the most character of all time. no one will come close#skulduggery pleasant#vaurien scapegrace#anyway bear with me
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