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#but I shouldn't have gotten mad bc we were on good terms and now everything is weird again
sleep-sounds-nice-rn
·
4 months
Text
I need to stop thinking about him I need to stop thinking about him I need to stop thinking about him
#and I can't just get high when I don't wanna deal with problems bc that's not ok
#it's so weird to go from being rlly good friends to casual hookups to nothing at all
#I don't even know how to move on bc we were never together and I don't even have romantic feelings for him anymore
#I just really miss him
#not just the physical stuff but I miss being friends and laughing together
#and I know I have a right to be mad at him to some extent but I also feel like if I was less emotional then everything would be fine
#he's probably just one of those guys that loses interest after sex but why am I still bothered even tho it's been months
#I really cared about him and it hurts to be so distant
#I feel like i've fucked everything up bc I got mad at him when really I was mad at myself and my insecurities and also him for ghosting me
#but I shouldn't have gotten mad bc we were on good terms and now everything is weird again
#and I need to get better and regulating my emotions so I don't do impulsive shit
#everything is just rlly weighing on me
#it's so strange that we didn't talk for over a month then I got high and texted him and now everything is so much more messy
#I want to be completely over him but a part of me still holds on and imagines what could have been
#if he had been in love with me or if I hadn't been so overbearing
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