#but I'm going to imagine a big glorious beard anyway!!!

[anderstrevelyan]

Can we talk about how Gortash commissioned a literal sculpture of how Bane looked in their first dream visit, and displays it prominently in his office??

*This is a bust of the god Bane as he first appeared to Gortash in dreams, and was then described to a Rivington sculptor.*

[pickalilywrites]

Hey I'm sorry to hear that you were sick and have lost your voice. It sucks losing it, doesn't it? I hope you get well soon! Anyway, I know you said you wanted some fluff, but I can't really think of anything fluffy for chapter 105, so could I possibly ask for something along the lines of Gabi and Falco sneaking onto the airship, only to find Zeke casually walking and talking with the SC?

I got my voice back in time for my big presentation! It went fabulously ^^ Thank you for the request! It was very fascinating for me to write in Gabi’s point of view for once :) 

Nothing Alike

Gabi Braun. Canonverse. 

2091 words. 

Shethinks it should feel the same every time. It should be like when she had blownup those enemy tanks on the battlefield. Seeing the bodies blown to pieces, thebodies of people who deserved to die, made her swell with pride when she knowstheir demise came at her hand. Why, then, does she not feel this way now as shestares at the fallen Eldian devil that she had shot down only moments before?The other soldiers rush at her, trying to restrain her, but she fights againstthem, tugging her arms and legs away from them because she’s desperate to seethe dying soldier’s last moments.

“Letgo of me! Let go!” Gabi growls, kicking and shoving the soldiers aside as bestas she can, but they grip her tightly by the wrist, preventing her to get anycloser to their fallen comrade. She tries to see past them as best as she canand is surprised to see them mourning.

Twosoldiers are wrapping bandages around the dying woman in a futile attempt tostop the bleeding. Two other men kneel close to her, their head in their handsbecause they know there is nothing they can do to save her. The other soldiershave a mixture of expressions on their faces – rage, grief, defeat – andsomehow, they’re familiar to her. It reminds her of when she had witnessed Udobeing trampled by a crowd and Zofia crushed by that boulder, their bodiesshattered like porcelain. She remembers the absolute rage and fury she had, theoverwhelming despair she had felt at seeing her friends dead and gone in theblink of an eye.

Exceptthis isn’t the same as Zofia and Udo, Gabi thinks bitterly. Unlike thismonster, Zofia and Udo didn’t deserve to die. These people…they were borndevils and should return to the hell which they came from.

“Gabi!Gabi!” Falco cries, clinging to her.

Shehad thought that his presence would be a burden to her, that he would gethimself killed, but she’s grateful that he had followed her after all. It givesher a chance to tear her eyes away from the dying woman and look at himinstead.

“We’llbe fine,” she whispers to him, pretending she’s braver than she actually is. Intruth, she’s terrified. For all the words about a glorious, blazing end shewould meet, this isn’t what she wanted. She wanted to battle, wanted to winvictory after victory, wanted to go out in a blaze of glory but not like this.And yet it seems that an early death is to be her fate, so she grits her teethand glares at the soldiers who stare back with cold fury in their eyes.

“Let’sjust throw them off the air ship,” a man says, grabbing onto Falco and Gabi’sheads roughly. He’s ready to drag them by the hair and throw them overboard,but he looks to the squad leader – the bearded man who had been mourning hisfellow soldier – for approval first. “That would take care of them.”

Gabiis ready to fight them all. If they were going to throw her off, she would makesure to drag them down with her, have their bones shatter alongside hers asthey hit the ground, but she doesn’t have to.

Thesquad leader faces the wall of the air ship. “If you throw the children totheir deaths…,” the man says quietly, “do you think this cycle of violence andmurder will end?”

There’ssomething in the way he speaks that sends chills up Gabi’s spine. It shakes herso much she doesn’t even struggle as they tie her up. She just kneels on theground, allowing them to bind her wrists together and her arms to her body.

Surprisingly,Falco speaks even though he’s still shaking of fright. “What are you going todo with us?” he asks, his voice trembling.

Anotherman, the man with the close-shaven head who had been one of the first to rushto the woman when she had first been shot, pulls them gently to their feet.Unlike the other soldiers, he doesn’t look angry, only tired and wary. “Ourleaders will decide what to do with you,” he tells them. He doesn’t sayanything more to them after that. Even as he led them up to air ship to meetthe Paradis leaders, he never spoke.

Gabican’t stand the silence that surrounds them. It disgusts her. How can theymourn for their own kind like she had mourned her friends? Her friends wereworthy of grief and sadness. Their loss was unnecessary, unfortunate. How darethese demons grieve for that woman in the same way? She wants to make it stop,this silence, because it makes no sense to her. They don’t deserve to weep, notwhen it is this hell is their own fault.

Asthey approach the door to where the Paradis leaders are, the bearded man – theone who had been against throwing them out of the air ship – gently prods Gabitowards the door. The soft touch confuses her, enrages her, because she doesn’tunderstand why he wouldn’t just shove her roughly towards the door even aftershe had killed his comrade. Why doesn’t he push her, shove her down, spit onher like everyone had in Liberio? Even after everything she had done, why is hetreating them like this?

“Don’ttouch me!” Gabi hisses, jerking herself away from the man. She’s reacting moreviolently than she should, but she doesn’t want to be in the same place asthese people anymore. She doesn’t want to be spared by them, these heartlessmonsters that the world hates. She wants to hate them, wants them to give hermore reasons to despise them, wants to further justify her loathing. “I’ll killyou! I swear it! I’ll make you die the most excruciating, painful death!”

“Gabi!”Falco whispers, alarmed at his friend’s words when they’re in no state to makesuch threats.

Theman doesn’t say anything to her, only raises an eyebrow and turns to the silentman who had been accompanying them. “She reminds you of him, doesn’t she,Connie? That suicidal bastard.” His tone is joking, but his expression is stillsomber.

Theman named Connie says nothing. It doesn’t even seem as if he heard the otherman speak. He simply looks ahead, waiting for the squad leader to open thedoor.

“I’mnothing like any of your people,”Gabi spits. She looks up at the man, expecting her words to infuriate him, buthe only gives her a tired and sympathetic look before opening the door,revealing the people inside.

Connieenters before them, announcing the death of the soldier – her name was Sasha,Gabi discovers – and two of the other Paradis soldiers leave almostimmediately, calling out the woman’s name as if screaming it loud enough willbring her back to life.

Therest remain inside, looking at the two children warily. Behind her, Falco makesa noise as if he’s seen something surprising, but Gabi ignores him. She scansthe room instead to search for the leader. She suspects it might be the soldierwith the eyepatch, the one who comes in after they’ve arrived to ask thebearded man who they are, but everyone is turning to the man sitting at theside of the room. His hair is shaggy, and he’s dressed in civilian clothesunlike the rest of the Paradis soldiers. He even has an Eldian band around hisarm, but she doesn’t recall ever seeing him in Liberio.  

“Areyou…Eren Jaeger?” she asks hesitantly. She had imagined that the oneresponsible for all of this would appear tougher, crueler. She only sees ahollow man in front of her, one that looks through her instead of at her. Hisvacant expression reminds her of the one she saw sometimes on her cousin andshe wonders how they can be so different and yet share the same expression.

Noneof the others answer her. Falco tries to whisper her name, call her back awayfrom the man, but she ignores him and steps forward.

Finally,the man sees her, but he doesn’t seem to have heard her question. He simplyasks, “Who is this?”

“That’sGabi,” a familiar voice replies. “And the boy beside her is Falco.”

It’sonly then that she realizes that Zeke is in the room with them. He had blendedin so seamlessly with the rest of the Paradis soldiers that she hadn’t evenseen him at first. The sight of him shocks her into silence, but Falco is theone to ask the question she so desperately wants to scream.

“Whatare you doing with these people?” Falco asks. He’s quiet, trembling, confused.In a way, Gabi wishes she could be just like him – weak, vulnerable, scared.“Mr. Zeke…we thought you died back there…Was this where you were the entiretime? With Eren Jaeger and the rest of the Paradis soldiers?”

“Yes,”the Commander simply says without hesitation.

Sheexpected him to deny it, say that he had been kidnapped just like they hadbeen, but to say that he’s working with them…that’s something she can’t understand.How can he work with these monsters who have brought nothing but pain and deathwith them? How can he be their ally when all of them – the Eldian warriors, theyoung cadets, Gabi and all her friends – have been trying to prove the worldthat they aren’t the monsters they’re believed to be.

“How…howcould you do this to us?” Gabi says in disbelief. He’s setting her back – all ofthem back – for what? What could have possibly made him side with the enemy?Hasn’t it been taught ever since they were young? The Paradis Eldians were crueland heartless, monsters that shouldn’t even exist. So why…?

“Because,”Zeke replies, “we are not at all that different from one another.”

Shedoesn’t want to hear these words, especially not from him. He should know whatthey’re like. They were so terrible that the whole world looked down on them.She was treated terribly just because she shared the same blood, even thoughshe had done none nothing.

“We’renot like them,” she whispers fiercely, but she’s more hesitant now. She doesn’tsay it with the same conviction she did only moments before.

“Areyou sure about that, Gabi?” Zeke asks her.

Sheopens her mouth to say that she’s sure, that she’s never been so sure ofanything in her life, but she remembers the soldiers mourning their fallen thesame way she had mourned for her friends. She remembers going into battle andlighting the enemy tanks on fire, bringing chaos to her foes in the same wayParadis did when their soldiers dropped down onto Liberio. She remembers thesame vacant expression that Eren Jaeger has right now, the same one she’s seenher cousin wear so many times.

Butit’s what she remembers last that frightens her the most. It’s the face of thewoman she had shot down, but in this particular memory she’s alive and sittingon the top of a building looking down on Gabi. Her gun is pointed at Gabi,ready to shoot. Just when Gabi thinks the woman will pull the trigger, the soldierlowers her weapon and retreats, allowing Gabi to go free.

Therealization hurts her head and she crumples to the floor, tears beginning toleak from her eyes. She wants to say that those are all just mistakes. Thatthey’re all monsters, that she isn’t a part of this, that she and the rest ofher friends never deserved any of this, but she can only sob because she’sbeginning to realize that none of that is true. If that’s all been a lie, then isthere anything in her life that had been true?

Shehears Falco in the distance calling her name. He’s kneeling down next to her,trying to get close even though his arms are still tied behind his back. Itdoesn’t matter that he can’t comfort her anyway. Nothing he can say can makeany of this go away.

Shethought that she wanted to be the one to end all of this. Now she only wantsthis all to end.