#but i know as a yt person i'll never truly understand

[turnbacktyne]

Are you native? I am too I’m lakota!

Ah unfortunately I'm not, but I'm so glad to hear that I have indigenous people in my followers!

I'm irish, but I've always wanted to learn and understand the native people in what's now America, especially since the irish and indigenous have a long history of supporting each other.

The powwow was open to the public and I wanted to learn and support local tribes so I was super happy I got to go! I learned a lot and saw amazing things, I loved the fancy shawl dance and the MC calling the dancers storytellers just really struck something in me

[youremyheaven]

HEYYYY [insert whatever pet name u like] it's ur venus stellium anon from last month.. do u remember me? sorry life happened 🤩 n i've been pretty low energy so i didn't get around to bothering u. I've been looking at yt vids of some of my chart placements lately and i've discovered something funny (along with other developments like me. I've been looking at ur blog the past one or two days a little and I obvs haven't made my way through the whole "backlog" but some silly thoughts:

I didn't know u were bi! For some reason I felt a little awkward talking about this because I didn't want to be That Person lol (aka everyone was talking about guys and I didn't wanna weird anyone out 😔) but my exes were women 😂 supposedly I gave them daddy energy lmfao I hate it because I wanted that from someone. I talked about them a bit vaguely but it might've sounded worse under the assumption of it being a man. (Unless I didn't say much and just forgot)

I've been reading celebrity gossip and only now realised how people - even the most successful - can have it so truly bad when it comes to romance and idk it made me a little apathetic and allergic to it. Not in a "im swearing off of it" way but in a "im no longer going to expect it in my life. If I get surprised, yay for me. Otherwise eh." (my mind's at a weird place though so it'll probably change when other things calm down, don't worry about me 🫶 this is all about the hypothetical future anyway because I'm not looking for a relationship rn)

Sorry u got hate about ur blog. I can understand anon got upset but the unkind language was uncalled for.

I came across the ask about nodes conjuncting big 3 and one of mine does; i can assure u (and the hate anon) that yes, this particular example (me) DOES happen to be cray cray 😭

This is related to the yt vids and point 2: My charts basically say I'll have an okay enough career, but the romance department would be dodgy because I will never be satisfied by anything anyone does for me (to put it shortly) 😂😂 that had me a little shocked at first but then I was like u know what we kinda knew this.. let's just focus on that career instead LMFAO

HARD AGREE WITH U ON THE FLIRTING IN NON-ENGLISH. I gotta be honest I cringe if I hear flirting in anything other than English (I've only ever been exposed to it in that language) but I read a fic (english) once where this man called his lover "meri jaan" and it had me in a DAZE FOR DAYS (excuse the lame pun pls) SO YES I AGREE W U. I've been collecting other little terms (just 1 so far) that I've seen people around me using affectionately and they're sooo sweet.

I HOPE U'VE BEEN WELLLLLL. I'm away from tumblr lately so I probably won't be able to send u asks in the near future but I hope u stay safe and take care of urself 💖💖 BYEEEEE

HEYYY bbg 🥺

I thought this was going to be astrology related but you're just checking in on me 😭😭😭😭and I feel so touched 🥺🥺🥺

1. About being bisexual

I feel like there are definitely different dynamics at play bc I do attract more butch leaning women who want to be my daddy 🫣🙈 but whenever it's a femme x femme dynamic, I always feel like I become the more dominant one and I do kinda hate it 😭😭

It just wears me out to be the giver tbh 🙃 especially because I already assume that role in so many other areas in my life, I just want to sit back and be babygirled 😭😭 this is why despite being attracted to women , relationships with women don't really work out for me 😭😭

it's all a matter of luck when it comes to love and relationships and sometimes things find us unexpectedly.

what I've learnt from some of my recent experiences is that someone can do all the right things, give you princess treatment and all that yet not make you feel anything 😭 so to be physically attracted to someone, emotionally in- sync with them, AND have a healthy relationship,, it's all down to luck 😭

2. not u calling yourself cray cray 😭😭

majority of people in this world are not living happy lives, be it with regard to love, career or family. To even have one of these things going well is a huge blessing ✨and while it's possible to have all of them, it's okay to not beat yourself up for achieving all 3 in one go.

One of my dad's childhood friends, remained unmarried into her late 40s. This is veryyyy unusual in India and she's not from a bougie artsy family where such things are chill or anything either. She, however, had a brilliant career and is a civil servant and rn she's in a veryyy high ranking position because she's worked her way up. Everybody around her pitied her (for being single and childless) but she was just out there making $$$ by the time she hit her late 40s people stopped pestering her because by that point, it's kinda "too late" to settle down. BUT GUESS WHAT HAPPENED??? she met a reallyyyyy cute Swiss-German man who was visiting our state/city and she happened to be the one showing him around?? (someone linked them up basically) and that wonderful meet-cute led them to marriage in like 2 months lol ,,, this lady who had been single for 47+ years found the right guy and married him in less than 2 months???? Isn't that sooooo romantic??? It's all about timing 💛💛 and now they've been together for a decade and spend most of their year travelling the world ✨and are very much in love

So different eras of our life will have us focusing on different things. Rn it's probably best to make that $$$ and focus on yourself. Love will find you when it needs to 💛✨💛

3. About flirting in non-English

JAJAJSJ yess I used to cringe 😬 hearing Desi flirting across languages 😭but now I feel like I've finally decolonised my mind to find it cute 😭

My ex was Tamil and he used to call me "bomma" which means "doll" in Tamil ,, I had a flop talking stage with another Tamil guy who used to call me "Kitty kutty" ("little kitty") and idk if it's a Tamil guy thing but they go hardddd with their affection through terms of endearment

Flirting in Hindi is always fun bc it's all "aapka this, aapka that" (using honorifics) and respect turns me on i guess lmao 🤭🥵 Idk if this is just a Desi thing but yk how men start calling you madam and ma'am 😌yeah I live for that shit 🤭🤭 they'll be like "madam is still getting ready" and I'll be like 😍yes the hell I am 😍😜

4. Thank you so much for checking in with me angel 🥺🥺 I appreciate it and you soooo much 💛💛💛 you're the sweetest

I'll take care of myself 😜 😌and I hope you do as well!!! 💛💛 May the rest of July be wonderful for you ✨

[johnwicklover1999]

very weird thing to experience being mixed and queer,

so many queer spaces and people online have no idea what to do when faced with a queer black person, there's little comprehension of how one's ethnicity and the concept of race refocus blackness (and everything, really) and how queerness refocuses blackness ~__~;;

native queerness is just about a misunderstood novelty,? i think is an okay way to put it? no, two-spirited are not just your native equivalent to trans folk., guh. granted i see that less than i used to so i will be grateful.

being both of the above and being able white is. Interesting. my mixedness has impacted my whiteness my entire life, people usually assume i'm white and haven't always responded wonderfully to my being a more ambiguous white-passing mixed person,. "white" has never been an answer i can settle for because it's incomplete, yeh? around the time i began discovering and becoming of my queerness what & who i am was Not relevant to me at all, ethnicity wasn't a thing of importance, and my general understanding of things was from a perspective of "race". if anything, i was just a white queer, at first i bought into lesbian and transmasc stereotypes way too much for my own good, and later on i wanted to look like the pale, skinny white guys with fluffy hair way too much for my own good. when my mixedness became a true thing of value to me and became a thing i started working to understand, it effected my whiteness first and overtime my idea of "race" ultimately began to deconstruct. "white" had never meant anything to me, but now it meant even less., which was Odd. the more i lost from nothingness, the more whiteness became a Pit, in many ways basically. ehn. i couldn't be a white queer anymore because by God if i were a white queer, white queers were not Me,. my whiteness became my irishness, my slavicness, my germanness, jewishness (?)), etc. and thus it was through those things i was queer and through queerness i was those things. or sSomething.

never in my life will i probably ever fully relate to other black or native queers and i'll never relate to white queers at All, lol. All In All; white queers do NOT know how to act around queer poc 🗣️ of the many white queer friends i've had and of the fewer queer poc friends i've had, being the outsider amongst white queers has been one of my greatest misfortunes. Alas,

EDIT: i remembered i wanted to say somethin g like; the white queer's only threat of discrimination and threat to safety is because of their queerness in a society made for them, otherwise they are fine. their threat to security and privilege comes from exposure, queerness can't truly be determined from the outside. there's safety so long as you're perceived as cishet

for poc, there is no escape from exposure, and so there's no real way to guarantee safety or hiding. revealing your queerness or having your queerness revealed is an even further threat to you. (in my own case [ambiguity/yt-passing], exposure isn't the most definite answer as to what you are, so now there is fear in being confronted about what you are, being honest about what you are, etc. ambiguity is a very uncertain risk, being visibly non-white is a very uncertain risk, it is a guarantee that you will be treated differently.)

[tartagliaxx]

i was wondering why everyone in my yt timeline was angry abt the anniversary rewards, so i decided to check it out. not a good choice. words cannot express how disappointed i am :))

this truly is the most gacha gacha game to have ever existed. even their anniversary rewards are gacha! (and it's not even 50/50, it's 10/90).

we have like 8 days left before it officially becomes 1 year, i rlly hope that they do smth to amend this bc i can tell that quite a bit of ppl who have spent money are either gonna turn f2p or are just gonna drop the game altogether.

it legitimately sucks bc genshin is truly an amazing game, but the company is just... not it. i dunno, for the amount of money i've thrown into this game (~$200), it just sucks that we get basically nothing back. i could've used that money to buy some genuinely better games on steam or smth.

i know that it's technically called a 'community event' but like, even for a community event it is pretty bad. if this truly is the anniversary event, i'll probably just never spend a single dime on genshin again. the fanbase is already pretty upset with their recent actions, but instead of placating them with decent rewards, they did the opposite.

i just can't fathom their actions, bc this just shows how greedy of a company they are (surprise, surprise) but that they just don't care abt their fanbase, especially the ogs that have been there since the very start.

— r. anon

ngl i am totally underinformed abt this topic. like for me, i’m dealing w so much alr i just chose to stay away from anymore yt and twt drama. tbh, i’d be lying if i said i expected anything from mhy. like sure maybe i was optimistic that they’d give more than the ten fates you get in the daily log-in but i realistically knew that other rewards would probably be contest locked and i didnt have any plans of joining any so in my head, there would be no more additional things to be given away.

i dont think i know enough abt gacha games to comment on this matter but i can understand the disappointment of the people. the top rewards that they plan to give based on the 4 minute video i watched to answer this ask properly is not even enough for one pull and im??? there’s smth obv wrong here? ngl the first place prize sound more like the consolation prizes.

alas, games are ultimately a business and ig they feel like they’re losing money if they give any more back (which might not be true in the first place? like personally, more rewards = more incentive to acc play and spend more bc it feels like the return is good value). i dont really spend any for games and i refuse to buy any more bc im saving up for actual irl things but i do admit at spending 9 dollars in the game. its not a lot and idk if its worth it but hey, at least i got childe. that’s enough for me ig😭😭😭

on a more serious note, i agree that this would’ve been the perfect time to make it up to the fanbase after the series of controversies they got involved in but they fucked up even more. i acc dk anymore im just standing here watching everything burn. i wouldnt say its entertaining but it does take my mind off the migraine im experiencing for the past few weeks so 🧍‍♀️

anw, genshin in a great game overall. i just hope that mhy wont waste that opportunity and do better w management and player retention.

[colour-outside-the-liness]

Oh so we took the same quiz yeah. Sounds like yours is pretty accurate really! I found out today my friend is, in fact, bisexual, and idk I'm just apprehensive her husband will try to use that against us at some point but I'm sure that's just my anxiety talking. I am a good friend when I put some effort into it I guess but I complained the entire time we were cuddling bc I'm also a bit of an asshole haha. Good thing she ignored it tho, sometimes I wonder why my friends put up with me lol. See now we know how to win you over miss, readers unite! She'll give us all we want if we compliment her loads (I'm joking, pls leave her alone. Girl has got an important job that keeps her busy). I actually watched a few clips of The Six musical on youtube but couldn't find the entire thing. I was able to watch the whole Legally Blonde Musical on YT tho. Cool! I do like Kylie Minogue so I'll def check this song out. I'm sorry you had to go through that but I'm happy Kylie made it better at least! I listened to Nirvana when I got my heart broken, clearly there are two types of people lol. Little Mix is good too! I've never heard of Peach PRC tho but I'll also give it a go, thank you! I recommend Pink + White by Frank Ocean, Washing Machine Heart by Mitski and Just Kiss Her by Concorde. Hope you like it, have been listening to these a lot lately! My day was great too! The whole weekend really. Glad to hear you had a good time as well. Awh I'm sure they'll win next time! Have a good week Colour and take care!

Mine is so accurate its scary haha!! Ahh I see why you would be anxious about that but I am sure nothing bad will happen- but I totally understand why you would be anxious over something like that because I'm anxious all day every day haha I don't think you're an ass for complaining especially if you're not an overly touchy person like people really should understand that and not be too harsh on you for not being as into physical touch as they are I don't think it makes you an ass at all that you complained. I know my best friend would complain if I wanted her to cuddle with me because she's not an overly touchy person at all with anyone!! You really do know the way to win me over... like just be the tiniest bit nice to me that's really all it takes... it's quite a worry actually haha 😂 And yes my new job is keeping me so busy!! But I have one week left of this term / semester and then I get a week off so I can do some more writing which is great but I really am hoping to have an update for you all very soon!! .... nice words are always welcome though haha 😂 😉 I wonder if the whole musical has been deleted then I'll have to check my liked videos and see because I used to watch it all the time but haven't had much time to watch it again recently it's honestly great and K. Howard has the best song ( almost 7 minutes long and she gets some of the best lines in the show) Legally blonde the musical is incredible gutted I didn't get a part because I had a cold during auditions but like, I'm totally gonna fo watch it when it's actually showing at the theatre There is a song called Golden but I am recommending the WHOLE album here because it has some truly incredible songs on it and just made me feel so much better. Like Radio On is a song that just spoke to me so much during that time and Shelby 68 is one of my all time favourite Kylie Minogue songs. The whole album is incredible and when me and my sister saw Kylie on her golden tour it was such an incredible night like the whole album is just *chef's kiss* Peach PRC only has like 5 songs or something but she's great and she's on tiktok and she's pretty funny too I really like her... and I love Little Mix should've seen them this year but because of Covid the tour was postponed until next year *sigh* I will see them eventually though!! Ooo I'll definitely check these songs out when I get chance, probably when I'm on my way to work tomorrow!! I'm glad you're whole weekend was great!! Mine was too it was nice getting to see some of my family though I am eagerly waiting for the day that me and all of my siblings are together (hopefully November 5th for Bonfire / Guy Fawkes Night!!) I mean they probably won't we're not the best team but dammit I still love them and the fans are pretty great too very passionate people in the city of Leeds!! Thank you I hope you have a good week and take care too!! 💜

[alittlealien007]

Watch "The Comments ทุกความคิดเห็น..มีฆ่า" on YouTube

Made a long ass comment about this series on YT and I just thought about posting it here as well just because.

I have a lot to say so here goes.

First, to anyone thinking that it's too late or you can't change things anymore, please remember that it is never too late. No one reading knows me irl and if you do, you'll probs think it's very hypocritical of me to cheer people up given that I'm me (me being someone diagnosed with major depressive disorder and go on bouts of intense suicidal moments), but when I'm in my lighter moods, I do see that there's still hope and future in this most-of-the-time cruel world, and I hope that you do see that too even in your darkest night. No one is truly alone. Your parents may not understand, your friends may call you an attention seeker, anyone surrounding you may roll their eyes at you, but remember to reach out and you'll see that there's a lot out there who are willing to listen and tell you that you are enough and it's okay to not be okay. If you need time to wallow in your sadness, please do so. If you need to tell people that you have a mental illness, then don't hesitate to do that. And if they mock or ignore you, then that's not on you. It's on them. You don't have to hide that you're hurting if you're hurting. You don't have to fake a smile if you can't. And again, if someone calls you a party-pooper then it's okay to cut ties with that person. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life. You're already dealing with your own. Self-care is okay as long as you're not intentionally and maliciously hurting anyone. And I cannot stress this enough, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. There are a lot of us out here who will listen if you just reach out. I wish that you'll be able to surround yourself as well with a good support system because that honestly makes a huge difference. I wish you the best.

Second, there's nothing wrong with dropping a friend who causes you toxicity. There's nothing wrong with cutting ties with a friend who blames you if you start withdrawing from them because of your mental illness. A good friend would understand you if you need time for yourself, will not push you to share when you don't want to, and will listen and understand when you do share. They will not put you down. Now, the thing with this is that you should also see when it's you who is being toxic to them, and you shouldn't do that either. Having a mental illness doesn't give you a free pass to control someone else's life. That's not how thing goes. You should still know your boundaries as a human to another fellow human. Treat others the way you want to be treated and live life without hurting anyone. I know some may say bad things because of their mental illness and I hope that the people surrounding you are people who will understand that your mental illness is not your only trait as a person. It's your illness but it's not you. If you unintentionally do or say bad things, apologize. If they don't understand, then maybe it's time to let them go. Ensure that while you're keeping your life free of toxic people, you also aren't a toxic person to someone else. Simply put, avoid poison and also avoid being a poison.

Third and this one is also close to my heart that I've probs ranted about this in a lot of episodes in this series, if you're already a parent or thinking of building your own family, please prioritize your children's needs, especially emotional needs, over your own. I'm not saying you aren't allowed to have fun anymore, specifically for you single parents out there. What I'm saying is that please, please, please don't do anything that could potentially hurt your child. Don't be selfish. You chose to bring that child into this world. You chose to put them here. And for someone who chose to do just that, you should then live your life acknowledging that in the palm of your hands is the life of a human who you could help flourish or destroy. And I hope you obviously choose to ensure the best things for that human life you brought forth in this world. (Because if not, I'll murder you. Kidding. Or not.)

Fourth, as a fangirl, I can't explain to non-fans how much happiness and sometimes my sanity relies on shows, music, books, and anything I geek out about. And that also includes the celebrities, musicians, and authors of those things. Watching my fave idol makes me smile and makes me forget my worries even for a little while. And I know a number of those who may read this knows that exact feeling of being saved by a complete stranger through their art. And I hope that while we love them for their works, we also respect them as humans themselves. I hope we don't make life hell for them by stopping them from living their own lives. Again, they're humans and not puppets. As long as they're not doing anything actually illegal then no one has the right to put them down. Constructive criticism is okay. Criticism alone? Not so much. Remember to respect your fave's boundaries and acknowledge your limitations in their lives as a fan.

Social media and the internet is great but hold yourself responsible. Also, why spend your precious time hating on someone when you could spend it on liking something else? Again, I'm not saying criticism is bad because constructive criticism isn't. If you're pointing out a flaw, ensure that it actually is a flaw and not you making a mountain out of a mole and ensure that you have a solution in fixing that flaw. Don't hate just because no one would know anyway, since at the end of the day, you would know. And one way or another, you knowing would eventually gnaw at your conscience and you'll also end up hurting yourself.

Lastly and wow this is long, I want to say I'm impressed with how straightforward this series is. It calls out everyone, and it shows how people are flawed but they can change. Hopefully though, we don't only consider changing after someone's life had already been spent because then that's just sad. Anyway, thanks GMMTV for a good series that allows people to discuss on a very important part of all our lives. Kudos.

Sorry for the long post, uhh, rant. If you made it to this end, I just want to repeat that if you ever feel like no one else is there for you, open your eyes wider, reach out as many times as you can, and you will see that you're not alone.