#but it's also my problem and my own thing to unpack. this isn't a guilt trip so much as me wanting to throttle the part of my brain

[tristanrambles]

Me through clenched teeth with a white-knuckled grip on my pen: My Art has Value, the Only One who has to Like it is Me, My Art has Value---

[disabled-stuck]

HI ITS ME CHRONIC PAIN ANON BACK AGAIN... here's my thoughts on who of the human cast is Aware That They Have Chronic Pain Issues. srry ppl were discussing and im like, Wow, Time For Me In Hc Central

june's issues start to really develop and get bad post-game (in my headcanons), so for a long period of time she literally has no one to talk to about it bc she's self-isolating. she eventually tells nannasprite about it when nanna is guilt-tripping her into getting up (nanna voice: Whatever works, hoohoo!), and nanna is like. this is my only granddaughter. i will do whatever i can for her. (i love june & nanna's dynamic. could u tell.) jasprose also is like GIRL!!! You Are In Pain!!! nanna & jasprose team up of the century to get june egbert to Acknowledge Her Problems

dave NO clue NO idea WILL not talk about it. maybe EVENTUALLY tells karkat about it but i don't think she ever seeks out a diagnosis or tries to get one. hes got old ingrained trauma about seeing doctors, which is something he's trying to get over, but like, he already has 4 bajillion other things to unpack about his childhood and healthcare systems are not historically good about chronic pain, a dismissal of their symptoms might set them back in that regard. they're just homebrewing this shit for now.

rose: yeah, she knows. she doesn't talk about it in those terms, though. instead of saying "i have a horrible migraine and cannot get out of bed" she tells kanaya to text the gc that she's afflicted by the Broodfester Woes and cannot join them this evening. theyve sort of picked up by now what that means but she thinks it's funnier this way.

jade: HMMM. i think she put herself through her denial paces but actually i think going grimbark essentially caused her to not feel her chronic pain (a side effect of condy's semi-control over her body), and when she got shunted back into her body she had to face the reality where she DIDNT hurt all the time like wow thats how ppl normally feel? what the fuck????

jane: oh absolutely fucking not does not know. unlike jade, his pain got WORSE during crockertier. yet it still takes literally two decades for him to finally acknowledge that his stuff is NOT normal and the fact that her whole friend group has chronic pain doesn't help, which kind of sucks. jane voice: well sometimes i can get out of bed when i have a headache and rose can't, so clearly its not the same (as if jane doesn't force himself out of bed even when he really shouldnt!!!). roxy has to be the one to tell him.

roxy: yeah she knows it's chronic pain. she's been worried about getting cirrhosis for years, and so has been keeping up to date on her physical health as a result. she figured it out pretty quickly after a couple flareups. trickster mode made it worse for her.

dirk: hal has been telling him for YEARRRRRRRRS that his carpal tunnel is just that, carpal tunnel. and yet. AR: Dirk, if you do not take better care of yourself, you are never going to be capable of building me a body of my own. TT: 1. I'm fine. 2. I'm not building you a body anyways, so the point is moot. anyways he accepts it during the game bc he's like you know what. might as well admit it to myself. good thing, too, because it only gets worse after a couple decapitations.

jake: has pretty much always known, deep down, but like. she lives on an ISLAND. the hell is he going to do about it? no, better not to think about it. someday they'll be able to deal with it, but that day isn't today, and theres so much to do. so he represses it DEEPLY. normal action hero jake english doesn't have chronic pain, of course. she's a heroic manly lead, after all... (the deconstruction of that mindset sort of makes them acknowledge it, though.)

ANYWAYS I JUST RAMBLED AT YOU FOR A COUPLE HUNDRED WORDS HOPE U HAVE, A GOOD DAY/NIGHT/WHAT EVER

YYAYYY no you're so good nonnie thank u forever and ever

[funkymbtifiction]

Hi, i know this isn't enough to type me for sure but what are the most likely enneagram types to feel this way [... cut for privacy] what types should i consider? And what types should i completely write off?

I read it all, and two things stood out to me -- you feel like you MUST do this out of DUTY, even if you do not want to, and you feel like you MUST help because it's a compulsion. I suggest you look at 2w1 or 1w2, since you are one or the other. You are clearly a dependent type (ruled by "must" and "I should" and "I have to" and "my duty"), and there's also some strong aggression there which might indicate core 1 frustrations with others' laziness, ineptitude, and resentment about having to sacrifice your own desires to fulfill your family obligations.

Sometimes, the problem with being the eldest child (especially if you are a highly competent/intelligent/responsible person) is that parents can lay the responsibility of raising younger children on you, and demand that you set a good example. Which can contribute to a sense of feeling angry within that child, because -- what about me? Why do I have to be the grown-up? Why can't they take care of their own needs? Just because I have always looked after them does not mean I have to keep doing it into adulthood, right??

I don't know where you are from, but Asian cultures in particular place a lot of responsibility on their eldest children and the girls, especially, trying to mold them into the position of 'caretaker' (wife/mother/etc). I also don't know if it's possible for you to work toward financial independence and live on your own, but if so, that is a goal worth working toward. Once you are out of the house, I both encourage you to seek counseling from a professional who can help you unpack all the messages hammered into you head (and help you deal with any guilt about not fulfilling them selflessly at all times), and ask you to start framing your life by asking, "is this mine to do, and what I want to do, or just something I feel I SHOULD do?"

It's normal to feel angry at your friends for asking for 2ishness of you -- but your reactions are also your choice. You are not obligated to fix their problems, even if your automatic assumption is "they are telling me this because they want me to fix it." That may not be the case. It will become easier to deal with relationships if you can remind yourself, as a 2/1, that you are not obligated to help them solve their problems. You are perfectly free just to listen and offer no advice, or to admit that you need to talk about your problems, too.

I am sorry you feel so much pressure at home. That's hard. :(

[rixxy8173571m3w1p3]

The Little Big Things (2/4)

(@ricksanchezdwc) So like we had done not too long ago, me, @hoodoo12 @porkchop-ao3 @rickstexaschick are doing the same prompt cause we all loved the idea. Thanks to @dorklyevil for allowing me to use a line from one of her comics. And I didn't mention it before, but this story references Labyrinth, and it follows the events of this fic As The World Falls Down.

This is part 2. If you haven't read part one then read it here. (Read Part1 Here)

________________

Chapter 2: The Scientist Who Became A King

Here, it was evergreen, and it never rained.

You had never known a time without the tears of God; the rain, which washed the earth clean of its trials, and its yesterdays, welcoming the oncoming morrows ever to come. Though, there was a time, you did without it, and you longed for it, and the places it touched upon; once upon a dream.

“Rick,” you wondered, as you did about many things. “does it rain here?”

“Only during certain seasons. I-I know there is a lake on the west side of this planet, but it's - it's a-a bit far from here. Why d-do you ask?”

“Hmm, I was just wondering.”

“Hohoho,” he chuckled. “as y-you should. Curiosity means a-a desire t-to learn or know about anything, and it isn't - I-I-I don't dislike it. ” He admitted with a wink. “Just in case y-you were wondering.”

You pouted, which made him laugh, a full on belly laugh. The little tease, perhaps the Rick in him couldn't resist.

______________

Side glances, soft smiles, random stories from Citadel, he was in another one of his talkative, happy go lucky moods. Blame it on the scenery, or you telling him an hour or so ago how cute he was, but he was running on happiness. “And th-thats how I-I got this lucky penny.”

Holding your hand out, you giggled. “Can I hold it? Maybe something good will happen.”

Glancing between you and the penny, he placed a quick peck on your cheek and dropped the coin on your palm. With a blush, he replied softly. “F-for extra luck.”

You gave it back, and continued walking, allowing him to wait anxiously, before blowing back a kiss that made him tear up a little. Damn it he was cute. Perhaps, you felt uninhibited, though Zeta-7 had that effect on you a great deal of the time; that or you two really were being affected by the environment. You two walked among enormous flowers for what seemed like hours.

The blood red blossoms drooped heavily from above, their faces turned down towards your tiny forms; their blessings hidden in the wind and its whispers. For a while you couldn't help but feel a sense of familiarity. It was as though the world around you was calling for you to return. You wanted to roll around, and tumble down hill, and the flowers gave you the strongest sense to climb them; their perfume thick and sweet, emitting a soft, amber glow. Petals drifted down like leaves falling in autumn. Each time one touched the ground, a soft sound could be heard; like a chord being struck on a harp. A great symphony was all around you two, with no beginning or end. Feelings of deep peace and satisfaction were within you; as well as nostalgia from false memories.

The thing about memories, they were like homemade movies; messy and out of focus, with the select few which were hidden gems, located in the corners of the basement in a random cardboard box; only remembered when stumbled upon. Though, if you closed your eyes, you would be back there, in that place where you had lived a second lifetime. And you'd remember that as charming as it had been, it truly was melancholic; like the rain. You'd remember the days you were almost a princess, and the loneliness of the mountain.

At the very top of the white capped mountains, it would sometimes rain for days, especially on the ones when you were the saddest; perhaps the mountain king had his own sadness too.

It made you wonder, if it was because Zeta-7 had been longing for you, or if he knew you were longing for him. For now, observing him, and seeing him happy, made you hope it really wasn't all that bad for him. If it had been, you would do all you could to make it better.

________________________

The ground was soft, and with every step you took, you'd sink a little into the moss pillows before bouncing back up; a lilting tune encouraging your playfulness. This place had a charm akin to the forest in the middle of spring, whose flowers and trees had spread themselves to enjoy the filtered beams of light. Of course, if you replaced the trees with flowers, and the light with that of bioluminescent pollen, then there wouldn't be much difference. Oh, that opened up a whole other line of questions which you could ask later, but for now you were giddy, and every time you bounced back up, you'd erupt into a fit of giggles. A few times, Zeta-7 had to stop and make sure you didn't hurt yourself, but for the most part, he'd stand back and watch, or take pictures of your amusement. A few times, you caught him wiping at his eyes, but he'd say it was nothing; you knew better of course, but let him be.

Later, there was laughter in his voice when he said, “Y-y-y-y-you enjoying yourself?”

You nodded in between giggles, and when you had enough, you stepped off the moss, and leaned against one of the flowers stems, breathless and tired. My, how the light filtered through the canopy of leaves, the low humidity, the intoxicating scent, and the view made you wistful. “The garden fairies had told me about a place like this once, as well as...” you faltered, suddenly afraid of triggering bad memories.

Though, he picked up where you left off. “A-a place you saw once upon a dream?”

“Yeah. Um, is it okay to talk about it?”

With his back towards you, Rick nodded as he unpacked the contents of his backpack in search for a snack. “If y-you want to.”

Sometimes, his passive responses stopped you from talking any further. You assumed it was a trait he had picked up or learned in order to avoid drawing attention to himself or to stay out of trouble, but it also made you uncomfortable at times. If he wasn't interested, then usually you would avoid the subject, but this time you carried on; even if with reluctance. “We haven't talked much about it since it happened.”

“I-I know.” His voice picking up that endless guilt.

“It's not one of those things that's going to go away,” You sighed. “and to be honest, I haven't gotten over it.”

Everything that had happened, at least the parts you remembered, you didn't want to forget. Well, except for the loneliness; you didn't like that part. In a dream, you had a family, friends, and almost became a queen, but what did you almost lose in order gain all that? Forgetting Rick? Almost losing your life? The lesser of two evils was your current life, but it didn't always feel that way.

You rubbed your arm, suddenly finding your shoes a bit interesting. “Am I supposed to bring it up casually, or what?”

“Do what y-y-you think is right I ugh - I suppose.”

“That's sort of the problem. I don't know what's right anymore” This caught his attention, as he had stopped moving, and soon after began to wring his hands. Damn, you needed to remember to control your tone. You continued, in a gentler tone. “You take me to these dazzling, wonderful places, and we usually go home happy and tired, with a handful of stories to add to our memory jars, and I enjoy that, and what we do. However,” You paused, nibbling your bottom lip in hopes of finding something better to say, but continued on. “there's something we haven't addressed, and that's me, and how what I do affects you. When we flirt with death, and get injured, because I wanted a good photo or something, how come you don't get mad? I mean, you deserve to after you went on a journey that could have been avoided in the first place if I would've listened. And forgive me if I sound shrill, but I almost forgot you. Doesn't that bother you?”

Placing the items back in his pack, and slipping it over his shoulders, he stood there so frighteningly still, you wondered if you had finally crossed the line. Then, he took out the penny he talked about a few hours ago, and gave it a squeeze. “It - it does, but y-you didn't forget me. At least not completely, and I-I-I guess I left a deeper impression then I had pr-previously believed..”

“But if I would have? Don't you see, I'm not prepared for this. We've gone over the other hypothetical, important what not, but not about the incident, at least not in detail. And I think it's about time we do, that way we're both aware of what not to do next time, and how I can avoid making an ass of myself. Don't you agree?”

Turning around, the lines around Zeta-7s eyes deepened, as well as the creases of his forehead, and there was a pensive cloudiness of his usually electric blues. The sweet songs around you had transitioned almost without your notice. Adagio, the melody now reminded you Clair De Lune, and Gymnopédie. “Well, I-I-I-I thought you - I assumed it made you uncomfortable, and that's the last thing that I'd ever want you t-t-to feel. W-w-we can talk if you're - you're ready.”

“If I'm ready? Are you?”

“P-p-possibly.”

“Honestly, I am uncomfortable talking about this,” you admitted, which compelled him to pull you close, rubbing your back in soothing circles. Enveloped in the warmth of the man you loved, and a distance away from everything else which could possibly hurt you, you second guessed on whether it really was a good time to think of it again, but how else would you two get past this? You continued, in that small, girlish voice that pained him. “but it's not because of what happened to me. I couldn't care less if I had gotten hurt, but if it meant hurting you, and if what I've put you through has, then I wish I hadn't been so careless. I thought I had it all together, and knew what I was doing, but all I seem to do is give you trouble. God, I'm such idiot.”

“Shh,” he cooed, brushing away a lock of hair. “th-thats not true. Y-you're thoughtful, and - and perceptive, and s-s-so clever.”

“What have I ever done that's so clever?”

Leaning forward until your foreheads touched, he confessed. “Y-y-y-y-you got me to - to loosen up and try new things, and showed me its okay to get e-emotional. Why, y-you even brought me t-t-to the moon without ever leaving the ground.”

“What do you mean?”

“I-I-I have wanted many things during my life,” he admitted, pulling back enough to study you. “but none of them have been as - as wonderful as you. And I've - you know that I've traveled across the universe, but it's usually been alone

I'm - I-I-I don't want to be alone anymore. Having you around has inspired me t-t-to get back in touch with my surroundings a-and the world, but I - you're m-my world. Gosh,” he blushed as he caressed your cheek, his thumb brushing away fresh tears. “you're - you really are more beautiful than the night and stars combined, and y-y-you don't even know it. Y-you're my satellite, m-m-mi Luna, and it takes a strong women to put up with me. You're my treasure, and I'd - I'd do anything t-t-to protect you. That's why I-I-I-I chose t-to do it, to go and find you. We're all w-we got, and despite what I thought might of - of happened, I'm s-s-so happy I found you, and that you're safe. W-w-with me.”

“What did you think would happen?”

With serious, but tender eyes, Zeta-7 answered. “Th-that you would have forgotten me completely, and never woken up.”

“And?”

He cleared his throat in the manner he did from time to time, trying to piece together the right words that wouldn't upset you. In a voice above a whisper, he finished. “And p-p-p-passed away.”

“Oh.”

“Th-that blue moss did a-a number on you, but there doesn't seem to be any residual side effects. I'm glad a-about that.”

“What if I would've had brain damage? What then?”

Jokingly, he answered. “Hmm, then I guess I-I would've gone back and used Mr. Needfuls gift.”

“You…..you would've done that for me? No, that's outrageous. If you did that, then you wouldn't have been able to do your science stuff.”

With a shrug, he softened. “Th-that's true, but we would have had other stuff w-we could do, and I-I-I still would love you. Diminished intelligence d-doesn't affect happiness. On the contrary, we'd only focus on - on what truly matters. That, and I'd have the joy t-to learn it all over again.”

“Rick, I love it when you get cheesy, but you couldn't mean all that.”

“I-I-I do, but it's okay if you don't believe it. I'll - I'll prove it, but for now let's not - not think about it too hard. Everything bad th-that happened, we'll - we'll talk about it and g-get through it. T-t-together.”

“So, I can ask whatever I want?”

“Y-y-yes, wherever, whenever.”

You knew he meant it to sound sweet, but it took a moment for it to sink in what he actually said, and you couldn't help it when you giggled. “Rick, I'm pretty sure that's the title of a Shakira song.”

“Hohoho, r-really? Was she on - on American idol?”

His obliviousness only made it worse. How cute. You really were lucky to have him, this patient dork of a man. “No, but nevermind that. I'm glad I still have you too.”

“I'm glad y-you're still as adorable and lovely as - as ever.”

Giving him a playful shove, despite the heat in your cheeks, you hid your face in the scratchy fabric of his linen shirt,. “Rick, how can you say stuff like that with a straight face?”

In his matter of fact way, he answered. “B-because I mean it.”

This man really would one day kill you with kindness, and this time it was your vines which stretched out, wrapping themselves on his arm, and it's flowers kissing wherever they could touch; his neck, cheeks, eyes, forehead, and mouth. It was amusing to watch him laugh and squirm, which encouraged his vines to do the same to you, but you two pulled back a little, and they returned to place, and behaved; at least for the moment.

________________

Rick decided to call the silly, cheeky, little vines from your matching bracelets Ioculus vines, which meant funny if you heard him correctly. Anyway, they were mischievous, and had minds of their own; or so you said, because you didn't want to admit how fun it was to tease Rick. Why, he might have been in the middle of an explanation, and they'd by climbing up his arm, and across his back, but he'd only squirm and continue. Though, the one time your Ioculus managed to kiss the back of his neck, he jumped back so violently, you'd swear he had seen a ghost. And watching him lightly scold the Ioculus as though they were children, then apologize for getting annoyed at them, not only made you laugh wholeheartedly, but it made you imagine him as a father, and what it would be like if he had to be a disciplinarian.

Perhaps it was but your girlish dream at work, but you could see him playing with two or three kids, telling them stories, showing them the magic of science. If they misbehaved, he'd take them aside, and explain why they might be getting disciplined, but never out of anger, and always reassure them that it was all out of love, and that he'd always care for them. And if you were honest with yourself, you pictured yourself sitting on his lap, after they had gone to bed, listening to how his day was, and how much he missed you. And you'd tell him….. Oh, but those were just thoughts; and you imagined a lot of things.

You wondered if the ioculus worked like mood rings and acted upon your feelings for each other. Did they know what the heart truly wanted? Because, as long as the two of you were close, the vines along your wrists seemed to interact with one another, but when Zeta-7 distanced himself, the blooms growth was stunted, and withered a little. And after a while, whether it had to do with the sensory overload, or your bending the forces according to your will, you were drained. “Rick, is it okay to rest for a while?”

“Of - of course.”

Leading you by the hand, he took a moment to spread out a blanket and you proceeded by laying beside him, feeling more worn out then you had anticipated. “Ughhh, I'm so tired. Honestly, when we get home, I might just go straight to bed.”

“Do y-y-you want to go home now?”

“No, I’ll be fine if I rest for a while.”

“Are you hungry? D-do you want a snack? I-I have fruit, sandwiches, and I-I even brought granola.”

“Maybe later.” you yawned. “Come here, I want to use your chest as a pillow.”

Carefully, he laid back, making a little old man sound as he settled himself. With your head resting above his heart, you kept quiet for a little while, listening to his heartbeat, the plants around you, and the Ioculus interact. When they did this, there was a sense of completeness, and you'd look at Zeta-7 and wonder how you could adore him so much. The way he wrinkled his nose, his ever changing expressions, soft skin, his sweetness, his everything; you adored it all. Aware of how vulnerable you've become with him, you just want to melt into him, and give him everything; anything that would make him happy. “Rick?”

“Yeah?”

Tentatively, you combed his hair with your fingers, gauging his response as you traced shapes lazily along his scalp. “Are you happy?”

He chuckled, draping an arm over you, answering softly. “When I-I'm with you I am.”

“Flirt. What about your hair, who cuts it?”

“I-I do. Why,” he tensed. “sh-should I change it?”

Brushing his bangs away from his forehead, you pressed a kiss on his brow. “No, I like it this way. It's part of your charm. I guess I was just curious, because it's not even in the back.”

“Oh that, well it's - it's not always easy t-to reach it.”

“Do you mind if I help you next time? I wouldn't want you to go out, not looking your sharpest.”

“I - I don't mind.”

“You'd probably mind if I kissed whatever I could reach. Especially right here.” you softened, pressing a light kiss on his neck which made his heart beat faster.

“I - I do mind that, but it's - I-I-I'm sure you'll probably just tease a-a-a little.”

“You're right, but I might surprise you. Maybe, I won't try anything and I'll just cut your hair. You'll just have to wait and see. Though, this isn't what I meant to talk about.”

“I ugh - I-I didn't think so. What's on y-your mind? You can tell me, if y-you want.”

Snuggling yourself closer, you wondered.“When you were in my dream, you knew about me, but I knew little to nothing about you. How did you become the mountain king? I mean, you don't seem like the type to rule or lord over anyone. So, how did that happen?”

“Oh, it's - are y-y-you sure you want to hear it?”

“I do.”

Caressing your hair, he sighed. “I-I will admit, that it - it wasn't as exciting as y-you think it was, but if y-y-you are sure, then I'll tell it.”

“I am, but tell me just the good parts. Oh, and the parts with me in it. ”

His blue eyes shone with amusement, as he kissed your temple. “O-o-okay just th-the good parts then."

TBC

[funkymbtifiction]

Is this an XXFJ 269 tritype thing or what?

I can't push people's perceptions and feelings and the humanitarian aspects of a situation away, ever. I'm thinking there's something wrong with me for it because the people around me who are very compassionate are still able to do it and resist the instinct to help people, or say "I know what you need and I have to help." They insist I am a 2w3, and I am okay with that (I probably am a 2 or a 6!), but everyone else, even the people I know who are also 2s are able to shut off their Fe when they need to. Like, right now, I'm studying for a class and finishing something, but I feel so so so guilty because someone might need my help and I'm not tending to them and I'm doing the wrong thing...

The self-judgement here is more 1ish than 3ish. In other words, this is 1w2/2w1 thinking, combined with being an EFJ, because you are judging yourself as "bad / wrong" for attending to your own needs and not those of other people. Yes, I would say this is 2 EFJ-ness. EFJs tend to think other people's problems are their problems, and it's their job to make other people happy, when the truth is -- it's not. EFJs have to learn to focus on themselves and their needs, while not seeing this as selfish but 'necessary' for their mental health and happiness. You cannot help anyone if you are worn out and stressed and have no sense of your own boundaries or those of other people. You need to start asking yourself, "Am I being rational right now?" (No.) "Is this mine to do?" (Often, it isn't.) "Am I being invasive?" (Sometimes, yes.) "Am I assuming others can't do it without me?" (Yes.) That is a 2 thought process and tendency, to rush in to help rather than letting others figure it out for themselves. What happens next is either you create dependent participants (who can't do it without you, reinforcing your belief of being desperately needed) or you create push-back, where people resent you for "interfering." Neither of which you want.

I would start by asking yourself questions whenever you start to feel anxious about not being helpful "enough." Where is this coming from? What is driving it? Why do you feel the need to help so much, even if you have OTHER things to do that are important for YOUR future (good grades)? Are you distracting yourself from what you are doing? Are you afraid that if you don't help, you will lose the relationship? Does it make you feel anxious to be by yourself, (not "connected" to someone else) and if you are helping other people, you aren't "alone"? What is the "wrong thing"? Where is this coming from? Were you raised in a household that emphasized that any self-care is selfish? Does your belief system or religion push you to be selfless or help others? If so, what is a reasonable amount of helping? Why are you doing this? Dive into Ti a bit and think about your motives.

This will be incredibly hard for you to hear, since it's going to rip apart your super-ego need to help, but -- most people can do things on their own, and don't need you to help them. Now, let that sit for a moment. What does this mean? Helping is optional and dependent on whether or not you can help (and they want / ask for your help) based on your time and abilities. Most people are not devastated if you say no, I can't do that for you today. It's only you who are being hard on yourself and judging yourself for taking time for yourself. I know it's hard to fight the guilt, but it's time to unpack the lies and use productive thinking instead of unproductive thinking. Not everything is mine to do -- so what is? What solutions can I find to my and my loved ones' immediate problems? Is this mine to fix? Are they asking for my help or do they just want me to listen and tell them it will be all right? You don't have to solve every problem, offer advice, or run yourself ragged for everyone you know.

How do people not feel an insane sense of duty and pressure to be beholden to people all the time?

They learn to set and respect appropriate boundaries. (And some of them are obsessive about other things -- for 3s, reaching their goals, for 8s, getting what they want, for 4s, over-identifying with their pain, etc.) Part of boundary setting is realizing what is your job or responsibility (it's not to take care of everyone) and setting your limit there. Just like 3s have to learn not to work themselves into exhaustion and unproductivity by not recognizing the limits of their own bodies and minds, 2s have to learn to recognize that it's not their job to look after everyone, and that it's okay to have your own needs. It's okay to be too tired to help (and not feel bad). It's okay to take a day off and disappear (without feeling guilt). It's okay to say no (they will find somebody else). It's okay to do your homework (and not be finishing other people's for them -- it's their grade, so it's their problem, and if they need that much help, they can find a tutor).

I don't do all of this to be loved like a 2 though, it's more because I feel like it's my duty and other people are counting on me and I have to be there for the people on my team.

2s don't know they are reaching for love, and are repulsed by the idea that they are helping for any kind of selfish reason, because that is the image they have constructed for themselves: that I am a helpful person, who does nice and good things for people. It's devastating to their ego to realize there's pride mixed in there, in the total belief that other people need me so desperately. By assuming they are needed, that they need to rush in and rescue people, they are elevating themselves to a higher place (that of the guardian / helper / parent) rather than on equal footing with those they help. It's painful for them to learn to admit this, that they elevate themselves through their "service" (oh, how sad... they need me!! they need me to buy their stuff or do their homework or champion their cause!).