#but like i thrive off feedback so I'm debating it though i am not sure that i would enjoy it
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I proper hate myself right now.
#ranting time i guess#i feel really bummed out that my latest fic has flopped#like i shouldn't care this much but i do#i thrive off the validation of kudos and comments and i am getting none of it#i shouldn't expect much though like nobody obligated to but like yeah feels bad man#it is a sad fic so i did not expect much traction especially as it is not merthur and instead of merwaine and arwen#but like it would have been nice to see some more feedback from the little hits that i do have#i am grateful that people even read my garbage perhaps i am asking too much#like i feel like it would get attraction if it was merthur but i don't want to write merthur right now i am steering away from the ship#but like i thrive off feedback so I'm debating it though i am not sure that i would enjoy it#plus I'm not doing great emotionally so i am already in a negative headspace#like i lost one of my cats three days ago as we gave her away to cat protection to be rehomed#and two of my eldest cats are getting put down in two weeks#i am literally devastated like i hate the fact that we have to do this#but my family and i are in a limbo where we're not sure if we're moving and if we are#we likely cannot have many cats bc right now we have five and most homes do not accept pets or if they do this many#like...... a lot going on luvs xxxx#personal#kl speaks#10.10.2020#10th october 2020
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