#but no one's perfect ヽ(ヅ)ノ

[tenacquity]

shoutout to @howthesleeplesswander and @soulscursed for their very existence always making ryuu go

[koala711]

My Missing Constant | III

[Kaeya X GN!Reader]

You never realize how important someone is to you until you lose them.

Content Warning(s): Grammar mistakes, minor mentions of alcohol consumption, a n g s t, slight mentions of blood, and very minor mentions of violence

Word(s): 1,267

[Prologue / 1 / 2 / 4]

(A/N): I’ll be honest, I don’t know what to put in my CW's because idk what qualifies enough. Better safe than sorry ヽ(ヅ)ノ

-

“The Acting Grand Master?”

A table filled with off-duty soldiers peered over at the currently highest ranked knight- a.k.a. their boss. It was a little unnerving to see her there in the place they let loose, but they were still curious.

Just what was Jean Gunnhildr doing at a tavern in the middle of the week?

“Jean,” the red-headed bartender addressed, not seeming to be too surprised to see her here. It didn’t distract him too much, though as he continued to work up a nice drink for one of the knights that’d ordered moments earlier. “I didn’t think I’d find you here tonight.”

“Me neither, but,” she let out a sigh, sitting on one of the bar stools and sliding over an already opened letter. “Master Diluc, do you happen to know what caused Kaeya to take such an abrupt absence?”

The clear, yellow liquid slipped into the Boston shaker before it was covered by the shaker’s top.

Diluc glanced down at the letter. Every single letter was written in perfect cursive, and the small marks that made it Kaeya’s writing were littered throughout it. He knew why he had left. Of course he did, how could he not? When he was writing the letter with hesitance yesterday morning, he knew that it would cause him to react like this, but not this fast.

“Well, the other day he did come in to ask about (Y/n).” This was one of the few moments that made Diluc scoff in amusement, thinking about how guilty the Cavalry Captain felt to run right as he got the letter. “Although, I’m sure there’s no need to worry. Whether wanted or not, he’ll always come back.”

-

The Dawn Winery was filled with people of all status', mingling happily amongst friends and family on the first floor. Gatherings like these were never Kaeya's favorite, but if it was for his brother, he didn't mind too much.

He hummed, swirling the bit of wine in his glass happily. Two glasses is all he is allowed tonight, but not that he minds. He has other pressing matters, which may have to do with the meek friend watching the party from above.

"You can't enjoy the festivities by just watching," Kaeya mused, standing next to you as you looked at everyone from above on the railing.

It’s been awhile since the two of you have been to a party like this, nevertheless Diluc’s birthday party. He was never the kind to throw extravagant parties like this, but Master Crepus insisted since it was his 18th birthday. 

"I know..." You continued to play with your fork, piecing apart the chocolate cake in front of you. "You know how I am at these activities."

After about 10 years of getting to know you, it was easy to know the things you were and weren’t comfortable with. He himself has witnessed the kind of events that gave you the perfect reason as to why you were like this, and sometimes he wishes he could have stopped them all.

Kaeya cleared his throat with a smile, looking over at you with a happy glint in his eye.

“Just because you are a descendant of the Lawrence clan does not mean you’re not allowed to have fun,” he says, holding his hand out for you to hold.

He could see the hesitance in your eyes, the very eyes he could get lost in if he were given a second longer before you’d torn them away nervously.

“I... I suppose.”

Your shy smile and acceptance of his hand was all he needed to whisk you away to the world you felt so far from, and if you ever became uncomfortable, he’d gladly lead you back home to where it all felt safe. 

By his side you stood, barely ever apart because you felt safe as your arm was tucked into his, and because even if he didn’t admit it, he enjoyed his proximity. 

At times he thought he was selfish, indulging in these moments a bit more than he felt he deserved, but whenever he looked over at your comfortable nature, he remembered that maybe it was okay to indulge if you were happy as well. 

Kaeya smiled to himself, picking up a bowl filled with the grapes you always snuck to eat whenever you visited the winery. He’d left you for a moment because you needed to go to the bathroom, and seeing these across the room for the chance you’d continue to smile the night away made him rush over and back.

He didn’t know when things became like this. When he’d smile at the mere thought of you, or indulge in this world the both of you felt like outsiders in. He didn't really mind though.

“Kaeya?”

He turned around to your voice, and the small smirk he had as he presented you your grapes slowly faded away like the light around him.

There he stood just outside of the cobbled alleyway of Mondstadt’s city of wind, watching as you appeared from the abyss. Your clothes were covered in eggs and flour, all roughed up with bruises and a couple of shallow cuts showing under the moonlight.

It was an awful sight to see for anyone except those that did this to you. Those who took things to the extreme for sins you didn't commit.

Tears dripped down your cheeks and fell to the cobble as your body shook with every step closer to him.

“Why’d you leave me alone?”

~

Kaeya shot up from the ground, gasping for air as he clutched his chest in a panic.

It’s been a while since he was awoken this abruptly, but it wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling. Despite the image he upheld in Mond, he had many things he’s always worried about, and you were just one of the many.

Perhaps the fact that this journey to Liyue Harbor was because of you that alongside his thoughts, his dreams and nightmares were also filled with you.

Kaeya let out a sigh, slowly picking himself up from the ground he slept on, and continued on his way to the harbor just a little down the road.

There used to be a time he felt as if he belonged in Mondstadt. It wasn't too long ago that that feeling weakened, but still he remained. He cared about some of the people there. There was no reason to leave.

To say he felt deserving of it all was another story. He didn't feel like he deserved many things, like the home Crepus gave him as a child, the family he had, to be Cavalry Captain after Diluc left for a while, and after the incident, he felt as if he was undeserving of you.

So why was he here at the gate of Liyue Harbor, chasing you down for hours and days for a meeting he felt as if he didn’t deserve? 

A person he didn’t deserve?

Kaeya didn’t know himself. He didn’t know what overcame him, too drunk on the desperate feeling he had in his heart and mind to not let you go like this.

He looked back to the mountain road he had just walked down. Perhaps he should go back? As he stared off to the road, Kaeya heard his brother’s words ringing in his head.

“Don’t mess up this time.”

...

He remembered his dream and how happy the beginning of it was. The party did happen in real life and the two of you did end up spending the night together. He could recall how the two of you eventually snuck out and sat on a small cliff along the water, staring up at the stars as crystal flies danced in the night sky. 

Kaeya’s mind was silent as he pictured that moment of simple bliss.

The least he could do was try. He was already here at Liyue Harbor, was he not? 

[patowinds]

BUCK-TICK Tour No.0 Final at the Budokan

It was a concert that took my heart and buried it with all kinds of feels. 

Doors were supposed to open at 5PM but it was about 5:20 when we were let in. 

This was my first Budokan experience and I’m a sucker for history so being in a venue with such a high profile was pretty cool in and of itself.

I had a second floor seat but really it wasn’t so bad, especially compared to some other balcony seats I’ve gotten for other halls. It was pretty nice having that bar actually so I could move around a bit during songs without having to be careful of not toppling over. The two screens on either side of the stage were huge so even on the second floor you could see closeups of the members. 

I don’t have perfect memory so forgive me for errors. I don’t remember the order of songs but I’ll try list all of the ones they played. 

The opening projection was really cool and used 

Nostalgia Vita Mechanicalis.    ノスタルジア　－ヰタ メカニカリスー

We get things started with Gustave and Baby I want you. This was a pretty solid start. People got warmed up. I mean, it’s Gustave. You kinda just gotta get with it       ヽ(ヅ)ノ

The setlist was a hybrid of the hall and live house tours. Zangai was out but later on Gesshoku was in. The sound for Gesshoku wasn’t too great but I’m happy they kept it in! It works well with the other songs and I just love that song. After Gesshoku was Babel which is as dramatic as always. Ophelia is back in after being taken out of the standing live house setlist. BIshuu Love, Salome Femme Fatale, Moon Sayonara Oshiete,  Barairo Juujidan Rozen Kreuzer, Igniter, and Hikaru no Teikoku were all played. 

Hikaru no Teikoku again brought out Sakurai’s old school style sideways peace sign which you get to see in all its glory as he draws his hand across his face. There were cheers, it was great.  (＾▽＾) Memento Mori was played, and Mr Darkness and Mrs Moonlight too. Memento Mori is always a crowd favorite. Cuba Libre got a pretty good response from people including those up on the second floor. In my area people didn’t just clap but they also danced/swayed a bit! 

Boy Septem Peccata Mortalia wasn’t as easy for people on the second floor to get into but at least a few people in my area (and myself) rocked it enough for everyone else. I adore Boy. 

Die was also kept in and is a nice one to go out on.

For the first encore Reishiki Juusan-Gaga “Ai” , Guernica No Yoru and i think Tainai Kaiki were in here (Tainai i’m blanking a bit on the order).

Before he sang Guernica Sakurai said 夢を見ました。 “I had a dream”.

It was the perfect start to a wonderful song.N

Guernica no Yoru is so special live. I said it in another post and I’ll keep saying it   - it’s just magic. The commitment to the delivery is insane. Every drumbeat, every guitar note, every word out of Sakurai’s mouth, you feel it all in your chest. The song builds, Sakurai sounds increasingly frantic and you can’t help but just stand still and have your heart be pulled along with him. 

I really like Tainai Kaiki and I’ve noticed this one is always more of a challenge for him to sing. This evening he sounded like he was struggling a little bit. At one point he had difficulty getting one word out and he put his hand on his chest. However he fought for it and pulled off the song. It was pretty moving. In fact, the whole live kinda felt like it was Sakurai trying to say “hey, I*m okay, i can do this”. Sometimes he sounded out of breath or he didn’t have the power that you might be used to but he pushed through all the way to the end including a second encore. This man, this band...professionals with pride. 

The second encore had Tango Swanka and Oh MY GOD. Sakurai just went all out. Legs up, striking a pose, pointing at his thighs and slapping them like “hey, please look at my amazing legs. Do you see them? Good.”

The camera often zoomed in on them and so now you have two giant screens in the Budokan filled with Sakurai’s thighs （⌒▽⌒）  it was kinda surreal.

In the second encore Sakurai addressed the crowd some more and he thanked everyone for the letters. He received A LOT.

When he introduced the band members Toll did a drum solo and started it off with just his hands!

When Sakurai got to himself the crowd cheered and clapped for him so hard. He apologized again, thanked everyone including the staff and his band mates and again said he wouldn’t make excuses. I think the crowd just wanted to shout SAKURAI DON’T WORRY JUST TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF   ლ(ﾟдﾟლ)

He tried to thank the people watching on WOWOW but he didn’t know which camera to look at so he just kinda looks around saying “eeer but where...i don’t know where to...”  and the crowd were chuckling.

Shared thought from everyone seemed to be  “ah, kawaii”.     （＾ｖ＾）

i heard a guy behind me say it, it was wonderful. 

狂気のデッドヒート was kept too and one more that is escaping me. House lights went up and Sakurai wandered off. It seemed like that was the last song but the rest of the band kept playing I think a little of 禁じられた遊び Adult Children before transitioning to Yume Miru.

Sakurai sang once more as if to say “nope, I can still do this, let’s meet again” 

Overall Sakurai seems to be doing better than before so hopefully with more rest his condition will continue to improve.

[mysplaced-pen]

You and Your Words [V x MC]

Here’s a V angst no one asked for and when I told people about it, I got yelled at with “AMS O U C H” :))) 💛 

inspired by Burn from Hamilton ヽ(ヅ)ノ and a thanks to the dialogue in Secret Ending 1

[ Word Count: 1962 ]

Jihyun believed in souls. He also believed in soulmates. Thinking back, he talked about it so much that MC was really convinced they were his soulmate. They were going to be together for the rest of their lives, knowing their souls belonged to each other. MC was confident in that future and they were sure Jihyun was too. The two of them had talks about it almost nightly, generating a fantasy of the future - complete with kids, a dream house, and talk of growing old together. They really did feel like soulmates.

Apparently, they were wrong.

It was during his newest exhibition where Jihyun would experience a beginning and an ending. He was there walking around and chatting with visitors, but someone caught his eye. She had been standing by this one photograph of a pink flower he took in the mountains for almost an hour today alone, and she stopped by yesterday as well - the least he could do was stop by and say hello.

Or, that was the plan, but he caught her just when she was speaking. “..Beautiful.” She whispered. “Do you like it?” He asked, stopping a few feet from her. “Yes, I love it.” The girl looked away from the photo to Jihyun, a polite but obviously confused look on her face. She was beautiful - long, blonde hair, green eyes, a pretty face - but that didn’t matter to Jihyun. He had MC, and besides, this woman was not the first beautiful lady he encountered. Nevertheless, something about her still made him curious. “Excuse me, but who are you?” She asked, bringing his attention back to her. “The one who took this photo.” He answered, a hint of a smile on his face. What? He could afford to be a little smug. Her face lit up a little bit, “You must be V, the photographer!” Jihyun nodded with a small chuckle, “You’ve been standing here for almost an hour, so I came to say hello. And didn’t you come yesterday too?” “Yes…the photo was so beautiful I just had to come for another look.” “I’m glad you like it, please enjoy it.” He smiled and was about to walk away. “Wait! I had something to ask you.” “What is it?” 

“The sun is the mother of all things. This flower wouldn’t have come to life if the sun hadn’t exuded energy. This consistent love and warmth, I feel it from all your pieces! Do you think a world…where our fears are gone and filled with love and warmth, like when I see your photographs, will ever come? Do you believe we all can become the sun one day?” Her words shocked him. He had never thought about that, never thought he could make someone feel that way. Maybe that’s what caught his attention. “No,” He said, “I don’t have such profound thoughts when I take photos. I’m not that great.” “You are great, V. Just by taking photos like this.”

Now, V felt like doing something crazy. Well, not that crazy since he had done it before. In fact, he did this when he met MC too. “Thank you…do you want this photograph?” He could see her eyes light up a little bit, but it faded quickly. “I love it, but I don’t have enough money to purchase it.” Jihyun smiled brightly, sure he was totally going to make her day. “I’ll give it to you as a gift. Please let the receptionist know your name, address, and phone number.” The lady blinked, “What? Oh, I can’t accept such an expensive piece!” They went back and forth for a little bit until Jihyun settled it. “How about this? I’ll give you this photograph, and you can buy me coffee after this exhibition. Your thoughts made a big impression on me and I’d like to hear more of how you see life. Oh, can I ask your name?” She paused for a moment, thinking it over. Which gave Jihyun time to do the same. It wasn’t a bad idea, her thoughts really did intrigue him…and that was it anyways. He wanted to hear her thoughts on the world, it might give him a new outlook on how to take his photographs. And he could really use a coffee. MC was working late and they trusted each other. He’ll just send her a text.

“It’s…Rika.” The lady - Rika - answered him. “My name is Rika.” He smiled, “Is that your real name?” She shook her head, “Well, let me tell you mine. People call me V, but my name is Jihyun Kim.”

How coffee turned into this, Jihyun had no idea. It was about 10:30pm and Jihyun was stumbling into he and MC’s house, but with Rika chasing after him, their lips clashing as he pushed her inside. Jihyun had never been this frantic before. Not even because he was worried about MC coming home, but because he was desperate. Desperate for this feeling, for this person who he was leading to his bedroom. The person not being MC. MC being the furthest thing from his mind at the moment. 

MC, his soulmate. Right? Or… “V…” Rika’s voice brought him out of his thoughts and MC was out of his mind again. It was just Rika. Rika. Rika. “Rika.” Jihyun breathed out.

Maybe MC wasn’t his soulmate.

That was a mistake. That whole night was a mistake. But…Jihyun kept going back to Rika. MC had no idea about what had happened, nonetheless that it was still happening. And it wasn’t even just sex, it was practically a full on relationship full of dates, small kisses, cuddling after sex. But Jihyun was hiding it from MC. Hiding this…relationship? From the person he called his soulmate.

He had a system. Two phones - one for MC, one for Rika. He wrote letters to both of them, showed them both the photographs he took, talked to both of them daily. It was eating away at him, but the more he did this, the more disappointed he felt himself becoming when it was MC instead. He wanted more of Rika, felt more of a connection with Rika. MC was losing their grip on his soul.

MC noticed something was wrong when their nightly talks got more and more infrequent. Nightly turned into every other night. Every other night turned into once a week. And now…nothing. Was something wrong with Jihyun? He did seem a bit more depressed lately. And he took a lot more trips than before. Well, he was getting more and more attention, it was probably just to get the perfect shot.

They thought nothing of it. Until the scandal broke out.

‘Famous Photographer V Engaged?! Who Is This Mystery Girl?’ Mystery Girl? MC asked themselves when they first saw it. People knew they were dating - though the gender situation was still unclear to them, but that wasn’t the point - but why did they assume they were engaged? Wait. Who was that?

There was another woman in the photo, one that MC had never seen or heard of before. Her and Jihyun were holding hands, looking like they were running across the street. She was holding a hand up to try and cover her face, but there was…a ring on her finger?

No, it was just a friend of Jihyun’s. Someone he was helping, as always. There was no way- The phone rang and MC glanced at it. It was Yoosung, so she picked up. “Yoosung?” “MC, did you see the news?” Right away, then. “About Jihyun? Yeah, but I didn’t hear anything from him y-” “I know who that is.” MC blinked. But they didn’t say anything, so Yoosung continued. “ She’s my cousin. And she had been talking about a boyfriend for a while now. I never got to meet him, but she mentioned things that match V…I should have told you, but I didn’t think that-” “Yoosung?” MC cut him off. It took a second, but he answered. “Yeah, MC?” “What things matched V that she told you about?” “Uh…he had an unusual hair color, he was a photographer..” “Give me specifics, Yoosung.” “There was something about letters…” MC hung up.

And as soon as they did, V walked through the door. “MC-” “V. What is this all about?” “It was a mistake. I was only-” The TV in the background cut him off again. “This just in! Photographer V released a statement! There’s…letters? A bunch of letters, apparently back and forth between this new girl?! Should we read some of them? Oh, this one-” V turned off the TV. “MC…” “You should go, V.” “…MC…”

MC didn’t speak again, they just walked off into their room. They knew V was behind them, but they didn’t care. MC wouldn’t speak a word to him again, but this was going to show him. They went straight to their shared nightstand, opening a drawer and throwing out all the clothes. “MC-” V tried, but MC pulled out a box at the bottom of it. They opened it, taking out pieces of paper. No, letters. They stared at them for a second before taking a deep breath. “I saved every one of these you wrote me. From the moment I read them, I knew you were mine. You said you were mine….I thought you were mine.”

V looked at MC helplessly, looking like he was about to speak, but MC beat him to it. “You and your words flooded my senses, left me defenseless. You built me palaces out of paragraphs, built cathedrals.” They looked back down at the letters, smiling in fond remembrance, but could also feel the tears filling their eyes. “The world seemed to burn..” Their voice hiccuped at the last word, hands holding the papers tighter. “You published the letters she wrote you. Told the whole world how you brought this girl into our bed.” The tears were spilling over now, and MC turned around, glaring at him. “You and your words, obsessed with your legacy. How they perceive you! You, you, you….!”

There was a pause after that, but MC held up their glare. V took a step back from them, tears building up for him as well. But that didn’t make MC back down. It only fueled them. “You have torn it all apart.” They stomped past him, pushing him out of the way to their built-in fireplace. Luckily, it was electronic, so MC turned it on and it started up quickly. “The world has no right to my heart! The world has no place in our bed. They don’t get to know what I said. I’m burning the memories, the letters that might have redeemed you.”

“MC!-” V ran over, trying to grab the letters, or at least one of them, from MC, but they were quicker. They pushed him away with both hands, pointing a finger at him and raising their voice. “Jihyun Kim, you forfeit all rights to my heart! You forfeit the place in our bed! You’ll sleep in her apartment instead! With only the memories of when you were mine…!” MC broke out into a full sob at their ‘mine’.

The next moment felt like forever, but MC was standing there, sobbing while V looked at them. Tears were rolling down his cheeks as well, but he knew it was over. There was no way he could fix this.

MC opened their eyes, glaring at V one more time. “I hope that you burn.” They said before turning around and throwing the letters into the fireplace. “MC!” V yelled, watching the letters he wrote them turning into ashes.

“So much for soulmates.” And MC walked past him, towards the door.

[revengebound]

Headcanon: Family

Full legal name: 

Jack Alexander Morrison

** Alexander means “defending man” or “to defend, help” ヽ(ヅ)ノ perfect for Overwatch’s commander am I right ???

Parents: 

Judith Maryanne Morrison 

affectionately refers to his mother by “mama”

John David Morrison

used to address his father as “dad” when he was a child but now its “sir” or “father”

Relationship with parents:

Mom: His mother is the definition of a saint. She’s incredibly sweet, kind, accepting, and welcoming to anyone & everyone ( especially her children’s friends ). Has a lot of patience when dealing with problems ( and problematic people ) and is a non-confrontational person. Believes a peaceful solution is the best solution. She would never want to see anyone get hurt. Jack trusts her the most when compared to his other family members. She raised him to be emotional, to not be afraid of showing his emotions, therefore he usually doesn’t hold back on them. She wears her heart on her sleeve and so does Jack. Since Jack is the baby boy of the family, she paid a lot of attention to him while growing up. Therefore, Jack adopted many of her traits & qualities.

Dad: Cold-hearted, cruel, and focused on reputation. Three reasons ( among many more ) that Jack doesn’t get along with him. His dad favors his older brother ( for they are alike ) and pays less attention to him. However, he is always pressuring Jack to do more and to be better. He never satisfies him. This is why his dad plays a large part in his feelings of inadequacy. 

Siblings: 

An older brother: Andrew James Morrison

often referred to as “Andy” by everyone but Jack

An older sister: Elizabeth Marie Morrison  

often referred to as “Lizzy” by Jack

A younger sister: Juliet Rose Morrison

often referred to as “Julie” by Jack

Relationships/description with/of siblings:

Older brother: Jack doesn’t get along with him ( though he is civil with him, even if his brother does not reciprocate ). Shares same negative traits as their father; he’s basically a copy of him. They’ve fought since early childhood, often getting into physical fights. One particular fight was fueled by Andrew’s jealousy over Jack receiving more attention from their mother ( since he is the baby boy of the family ). The fight was so brutal that his older brother pinned him down in the backyard and struck his head with a rock ( nearly killing him ). Jack ultimately forgave him for that day, but he will never forget it. This incident is also what led Jack to distrust his brother, further severing their relationship.

Older sister: The most trusted sibling for Jack. He will confide anything & everything to her. She is very similar to their mother though she will stand up for herself and is prone to be violent when angered ( their mother wouldn’t hurt a fly ). She’s basically his support system and even when busy manages to slip some time to chat with her. 

Younger sister: The sunshine of his life. Never fails to put a smile on Jack’s face even if he is in the worst of moods. He loves her dearly and they get along really well.

Pets: A female golden retriever named Jolene Ann Morrison ( named by the older sister ).

often referred to as “Jo” or “Jo-jo”