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#but we're probably gonna fuck off and ignore the fact hunter is missing for at least an entire episode bc why not!
yuichi-ro · 2 years
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honestly i love shipping but like
most of the time only when is a shonen show written by a man. solely bc most of the time they suck at writing romance and women and its a personal flex when i can go “haha you suck i am better than you at this.”
but i also only ship extremely specific tropes that i in everything which are not heteronormative in itself at all so like… i am definitely in the minority there as well lmao. have gotten death threats over the stuff i write before so maybe just seeing the hate this honestly rather relaxing show for me receives reminds me of that.
romance and slice of life is 100% just me yearning for what they have lmao but i am also super picky when it comes to stuff like that. nothing will ever beat ouran high school host club that was way ahead of its time
that and the unbridled rage burning in my body because the entire fugging covid situation i am in rn.
i have three roommates, the two who also got covid and i spend the last two weeks with and then the third roommate who is, for the lack of a better word, a womanchild. my other two roommates i love with all my heart- i am sitting here eating a popsicle one of them got out of their way to get me after i told them my throat was hurting bc of covid (since they are already off the hook again and negative) and the other one is also super super nice. but the third one. god i hope she moves out soon. never does any of her chores, never cleans her dirty dishes and is just generally childish and gross ugh. she is in her thirties as well. i was more responsible at 12 than she is now. so so frustrating ugh
not to mention two of the profs ive mailed bc of missed work still haven’t mailed me back and without being able to go to my outlet for my emotions being the gym, my sanity is slowly fading thats why i am sitting on the crossover google doc lmao
mostly trying to figure out reader’s personality right now as i want her personality to also reflect how she doesn’t exactly know who she is as she has the constant opportunity to be who the other person would most want with of course getou and later some of the others trying to help her with that. so as a basis probably someone outwardly friendly with an easy going facade and smile as to always lure others into a sense of security? her being a good people person is a given with her cursed ability i just need to find a way to translate it well without it coming off as annoying oof
also definitely want the sorcerer trio (getou gojo reader) to have this air of… adult coolness around them? since they definitely werent allowed to ever be kids and the tr boys are just… kinda losers they eat that up tbh so… reader as mature but playful for the hidden mommyness vibes
i am talking out of my ass thats what i get from the meds smh but writing flustered boys is my therapy so so it shall be. the greedy part of my brain hath spoketh or something.
also definitely thought about building up a narrative parallel to the three monkeys of “see no evil hear no evil speak no evil” as monkeys just fits to getou anyway but see no evil -> gojo with his six eyes, hear no evil -> reader with their ability, speak no evil -> getou with his curse swallowing idk it seems kinda fitting and fun but also dumb XD
also also i shall check this sonny boy show out… knowing u it’s probably good and probably has zeno robinson in the eng dub… what can go wrong. god i am not ready for new episodes of amphibia and owl house tomorrow. not at all. pls let is get a glimpse at darius comforting hunter thx
-🌌momo
growing up on bleach I guess there were just so many possibilities of relations between five hundred fucking characters (ok I'm not even exaggerating I think there might be that many) that shipping never appealed to me. Though I can't say I hate it bc I mean forever I've always loved developing OCs and with shipping that way. But to be a full blown shipper and the weird fixations people grow like if their ship doesn't end up canon they will die turned me off from it pretty much immediately (like people bullying creators of disney shows so badly they have to end shows and butcher endings just to stop receiving death threats like wtf is wrong with people i know not all shippers are like that but...there's a lot more like that then their should be)
but not even as someone who cares about shipping I've received death threats so we can be buddies in that boat babe <3
ok even I can't deny how good ouran was. That is one of those stupid shows my wife did convince me to watch and I did like it. And unironically I do love the main couple. Like- for me to give a shit about a relationship- I need to feel that the characters will love each other no matter what. Even if they were worms or the same gender or two trees in a forest. I need that heart wrenching kind of soul mate bond that transcends having a human body then I'm into it (I will die on Ichigo/Orihime. That was my favorite thing as a kid and even as an almost 30 yr old that entire thing kills my heart every time I think about it)
ok but the amount of people in their 30s that act like though?? It must be a generational thing bc most the people I went to beauty school in that age bracket were just as disgusting?? And in the weirdest like permanent child ways?? RIP I would loose my shit but I live with my brother who basically is the same way. I mean he's not in his 30s but he's a spoiled rotten youngest child with an addiction so the cleaning up after someone with the mentality of a child is trying I get it. The other ones sound absolutely pleasant though. Having roommates honestly was one of the reasons I refused to go to a four year college. My friends that did had the horrific experiences you read on like reddit and our college was like "Its mandatory you live on campus or we won't let you in" and I noped outta that so fucking hard. Not trading my sanity for a paper I ended up not using anyways 🙃
ok but no seriously you SHOULD check out sonny boy bc the way you're trying to figure out the readers personality would fit two of the female characters on there SO well for inspiration. Like no joke reading the ideal outline of how you want the reader to come off, there's exactly two sonny boy characters that I think would be freaking perfect in both mentality, speech patterns and morals that would do you wonders for refining the readers personality for the crossover fic. Like I'm not trying to sell you on the show (besides the fact its visuals are stunning ngl) but in terms of your fic I think that show could offer the BEST ideas for it. Even with the three monkey's thing to include the trio/dumbassery/mortality of being a sorcerer. Like you gotta watch it now the story telling and tonality to the series would do SO well for the crossover fic and vetting out personalities/relationship patterns between the trio + reader and so forth. Like my nerd brain is buzzing there's so much symbolism in sonny boy that would lend itself sooo fucking well to the crossover fic in general
AND I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THERE'S NOT ZENO ROBINSON IN IT THANK YOU VERY MUCH....not that there shouldnt be him in everything -3-
the VAs in sonny boy are amazing though, Shinra (fire force) is in it, Uraraka's VA, Aizawa's VA, Endeavor's, and two of them sound really a lot like Chifuyu and Bakugou but they aren't. Still though cast is really amazing and their tones send chills down your spine just as much as the amazing animations (it shares the same director of Space Dandy if you've watched that)
god i fucking saw the announcements that Amphiba is moving to end game status with what's going to happen and IM JUST NOT FUCKING READY THIS ISNT GONNA TURN OUT WELL FOR SOMEONE AND EMOTIONALLY IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH
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helloalycia · 3 years
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overstepping [one] // jane banner (Wind River)
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summary: after getting several voicemails from your colleague and best friend with her asking for your backup, you attempt to call her back, only to get no answer.
warning/s: mentions of rape, murder and injuries.
author’s note: this is a two parter because i finally watched Wind River and it broke my heart but also lizzie was v cute and i felt the need to write this, hope you like it x
part two | masterlist | wattpad
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"C'mon, work you stupid phone," I complained for the millionth time, before standing on the chair to get a better signal.
When I saw the bars in the corner of the screen increase, a grin appeared on my lips. I loved my parents, but the fact that they lived in a remote cabin in Tennessee with zero signal was not my favourite thing.
When the bars remained, my phone decided to actually be helpful and receive all the messages, calls and voicemails I missed. I did a brief flick through, noticing nothing was too important that couldn't wait for me to return to work. As an FBI agent, I rarely got time off. And now that I had taken a two month vacation to spend with my parents, I was adamant on enjoying it, even if I was missing work a smidge.
Next were the calls, which I noticed were mostly from my colleague and close friend, Jane Banner. I furrowed my brows, realising she'd left me several voicemails, too, which was strange since she knew I was on a break from work. What could be so important?
I sighed, glancing down at my uncomfortable position standing on the chair and leaning above the wardrobe. It was the only place in the house with decent signal and the only other place that wasn’t in the middle of nowhere was twenty minutes out. Telling myself I'd just listen to one voicemail to make sure everything was okay, I played the earliest message.
"Hey, Y/N. I'm sorry, I know you're on a break, but I just had to talk to you," it began, and Jane sounded troubled. "I was in Vegas, as you know, but I've been called out to a reservation in Wyoming where this poor girl was–" She paused, releasing a shaky breath. "She was raped and left to die out in the cold. I thought I could send in another team to take a look – y'know, usual protocol. But the coroner won't rule it a homicide and you know what that means."
I swallowed hard, knowing exactly what that meant. If it wasn't ruled a homicide, no backup would come and we had to move onto the next case. But if this girl was raped and left to die, the rapist was still out there and wasn't getting caught by the FBI.
"I can't just leave it and go," Jane continued quietly, with that recognisable passion for her job evident in her voice. "I have to do what I can. But I... I can't do this alone. It's not like other cases, Y/N. It's different out here. And there's only so much their police department can do. I know you're on a break, but I was hoping that, maybe, you could come out here and help me? It's the Wind River Indian Reservation. That's it, I guess. Bye."
The message ended and I found myself chewing on my lower lip anxiously, unable to think about anything other than Jane now. She'd worried me with that one voicemail alone – I couldn't imagine what the others said.
She was usually so good at dealing with cases, but this seemed different. She sounded shaken up, attempting to put on a brave face by the sounds of it. What was so different about this case? She didn't need me. She was capable.
Curiosity got the better of me and I played the second message, ignoring the discomfort in my arms as I stretched to maintain the signal. It was left a day after the first one.
"Hey, so I just remembered that you said you don't get much signal up there with your parents," she began apologetically. "I don't mean to– shit, it's so cold..." There was a pause, a noise in the background, then she continued, "Sorry, just turning up the heating. Anyway, I was saying. I don't mean to intrude on your break. I just– I'm hoping you'll find signal and hear this because I could really use your help. I think we've got a lead on who may have done it. It was hectic today. Really could've used that backup."
She chuckled dryly at her attempt at a joke, but all I felt was guilt. She sounded exhausted within a day of being there.
"I hope you get this," she finished with a sigh. "I should go. Got a busy day tomorrow. Hope you're doing okay. Bye."
I wasted no time in playing the next message. Three days into her case.
"I don't know why I keep sending these," she began with a hoarse voice, and my heart clenched at the sound of it. "You clearly aren't getting them in time. But it's easier talking to you like this than not at all."
It went quiet, so quiet that I thought she may have finished and forgot to hang up. But then she spoke up again, a whimper escaping her lips.
"It's so hard," she admitted. "We've covered worse cases, but this one... everything about it makes me uncomfortable. Something doesn't feel right. I've got a lead – we think it might be the boyfriend who did it and we're gonna see him tomorrow. But I don't know."
I frowned, squeezing my phone tightly because I didn't recognise the girl speaking as my friend. This girl sounded broken and I wondered what she could have discovered that made her like this.
"I've got the police department with me for backup," she said with a sniffle. "And Cory, he's a hunter whose been helping me with the case. They're all gonna be with me tomorrow. But I wish you were here, too. You always make things easier."
The lump in my throat wouldn't disappear no matter how many times I swallowed it. She made things easier, too. Always. And all I wanted to was be by her side and be there for her like she always was for me.
"Sorry about this," she said with a watery laugh, and I could imagine the embarrassed smile on her face as she did. "I sound like such an idiot. Never mind these messages. Just enjoy your break. I shouldn't be worrying you like this. See you when you get back."
The message ended and I checked to see if there were anymore, but to my disappointment, there wasn't. That message was from a few days ago and she hadn't sent anything since which was concerning in itself.
Trying not to panic for no reason, I called Jane. Hopefully everything was okay and I was being stupid. She was a fully-trained FBI agent. She could take care of herself. Right?
The call rang and rang, but nobody picked up. One missed call. No biggie. She probably heard it and couldn't find her phone or something. So, I tried again.
More ringing and no answer. Okay, no big deal. Just try again.
Another call and no answer. The chewing on my lip became more intense. Why the hell wasn't she picking up? Was she still working the case?
I waited an hour, trying again at ten minute intervals, unable to fight my concern. But there was no answer every time and I realised that I couldn't sit and wait for her to call back. Not after how she sounded in those voicemails.
No, I had to go there. She needed backup.
Wyoming was way colder than I could have prepared for.
I mean, technically, I prepared for nothing. I bid my parents a goodbye, threw some random clothes in a bag and caught the next plane over there. I tried for Jane's phone constantly, knowing she was never one to ignore me for this long, but there was no point. She wasn't answering, which could only mean so much.
When I reached the reservation, I had no idea where anything was or what I was looking for exactly. I just knew that as soon as the taxi dropped me off in the centre of town, I didn't know where to go.
There were a lot of locals hanging around, so my first port of call was to ask them if they'd seen Jane around – or Agent Banner, as she may have introduced herself. I showed them a picture of her on my phone, described her with vivid detail, but they just stared at me like I was crazy. I was starting to believe I was at one point, until I stopped by the convenience store.
As worried as I was for Jane's whereabouts, the chill in my bones was real. Especially my hands, which I was certain would fall off any minute. So, I decided to buy some gloves and also ask the cashier if he'd seen Jane around or heard anything of her. Whilst I was doing that, a customer caught my attention, probably having overheard my conversation.
"Did you say Jane Banner?" he asked with a quirked brow, interrupting my purchase. "The FBI lady, right?"
I nodded quickly, facing him. "Yes, that's her! D'you know where she is?"
He nodded casually. "Yeah, she's in the hospital. That big shootout that happened a few days ago, right?"
My stomach dropped. "The what?"
"The shootout," he repeated, not aware of the concern in my face. "At the drill site. A bunch of officers were killed and the FBI lady was one of the only one left standing." He tutted as he shook his head. "Very lucky that one."
A shootout? The hospital? Only one left standing? No wonder she hadn't been answering her calls.
"Can you– do you–" I stopped, clearing my throat and trying to stop freaking out. "Which hospital?"
After getting the address from him, I caught a taxi to the only hospital in town and prayed to God that Jane was okay. The one thing she'd asked for was backup and I couldn't even give her that. If I'd just looked at my messages sooner... fuck.
Getting past the front desk and to Jane's room was no issue at all. A quick flash of my FBI badge was enough for the receptionist to give me the details and wave me through. My heart was constricting in my chest the longer it took. What if it was really bad? What if that customer's intel was outdated and Jane was– no. I couldn't afford to think like that.
Upon finding Jane's room, I spotted an older man leaving through the door, being careful to close it behind him. I didn't recognise him at all.
"Excuse me," I called, earning his attention. "Is that Jane Banner's room you just came from?"
He seemed surprised, glancing over his shoulder to make sure I was speaking to him, before nodding. "Yes. Sorry, who are you?"
I pulled my badge from my pocket and showed him, though I doubted anyone would take me seriously when my eyes were watering at thought of Jane being severely injured.
"I'm her friend," I said, swallowing down the lump in my throat before lowering my badge.
"Oh, you're the backup that didn't come," he said with realisation.
My eyes flickered to the floor guiltily. He wasn't exactly wrong.
"I didn't mean it like that," he added quickly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."
I shook my head, lifting my eyes to meet his. "It's okay. I should've... I should've been here." It went quiet as he didn't know what to say, so I looked to him halfheartedly. "I assume you're from the police department, one of the ones who helped Jane."
"Not exactly," he said, before putting out his hand for me to shake. "Name's Cory. I'm a hunter by trade."
Returning his handshake, I recalled Jane's voicemail. "Oh, yeah, she mentioned you... thank you for helping her out."
When I couldn’t, I added in my head.
He offered me a small smile and I couldn't find it in myself to return it. I must have looked like shit, since he gave me a pitiful gaze.
"You want me to catch you up before you go in?" he asked, nodding to Jane's door. "She's okay by the way."
I nodded, sucking up a breath. My nerves were eating away at me the longer I didn't see Jane – half of me was terrified of what I'd find, and the other half was afraid she'd be upset or angry because I left her to it, even when she pleaded for my help.
Cory and I took a seat down the hall and he proceeded to explain about the case and how they found the guy who raped that poor girl. The shootout was the worst bit, making me shiver with discomfort. Apparently, Jane had gotten blasted with a shotgun, puncturing her torso and neck despite the vest she wore. All of the officers with her were killed and by the sounds of it, Jane almost was, too. But Cory managed to take out the criminals and the rapist himself. When he was finished telling me, I had no words.
"She's a bit shaken up, but her surgery went well," Cory reassured with a short nod. "Does she know you're coming?"
I shook my head, voice thick with emotion. "She wouldn't answer her phone. I guess I know why now."
Cory nodded, rubbing the back of his neck before sparing me a consoling glance. "She talked about you a lot. I think it'll cheer her up seeing you. You should go."
My eyes met his, teary and stinging with unshed tears. "Thank you so much."
He shrugged bashfully, but he didn't realise all that he'd done. I gave him a small, tight smile before standing up with a sigh. No point dwelling anymore – I had to see her.
Pushing my selfish feelings aside, I sucked it up and approached Jane's room. She would either want to punch me or not, but either way, I had to see if she was okay. And so, when I opened the door slightly, heart racing in my chest, said heart jumped in my throat at the sight of her.
She was laying on the bed with wires stuck in her and, only from what I could see, bandages were covering the side of her neck. I thought she was sleeping at first, but then her head tilted towards the door curiously, and bright blue eyes widened with disbelief.
"Y/N?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. "What are you– how did you get here?"
I closed the door behind me and hesitantly approached her bedside, unable to stop my eyes from soaking in the sight of her. She looked so feeble and vulnerable and unlike how I saw her last. Then, Cory's words came back to me and I began to imagine the worst scenario of her getting shot, blood seeping from her wounds, the life draining from her eyes...
"Y/N," she called, and I looked to her startlingly, hoping I didn't look as troubled as I felt.
"Sorry," I said, clearing my throat. "I, er– the messages. Voicemail. I heard them and tried calling you back, but..."
She pursed her lips, exhaling with a wince and looking up at the ceiling, as if suddenly remembering she left messages in the first place.
"I'm sorry I didn't come sooner," I said quietly, guilt seeping back in.
"No, no, don't be," she said, and I just about noticed the pink dusting her cheeks. "It's not your fault. I shouldn't have interrupted your vacation like that. I know you said you wanted a break and–"
"Jane, no, don't even say that," I cut her off, reaching for her hand in an instant. She looked my way, eyes flickering between mine nervously. I squeezed her hand gently and said, "I should have been here. You needed me and I– I didn't come. Maybe if I had, this could have ended differently."
She tried to smile, but I could see the discomfort in her eyes. "It's not that bad, honestly. It just looks bad."
I pressed my lips together, eyes falling to the bandage on her neck. Even though it was big and covered her wound, I could still make out the bruising around it from the impact of the shell. I didn't imagine the torso wound looking any different, and that thought alone made me regret leaving her alone. It was very much as bad as it looked; I knew that and she knew that.
Her lips trembled as she avoided my eyes, her own tearing up. I pushed away my guilt momentarily and changed the subject.
"So, I met Cory. He seems like a great guy."
She didn't say anything as she seemed lost in thought. Either that or she was trying not to cry in front of me. I hoped it wasn't the latter, since the last thing I wanted was to make her feel uncomfortable.
"You know," I said, when she wouldn't speak, "I'm pretty sure I told you to stay safe before I left for my vacation."
At my poor attempt to lighten the mood, she cracked a small, tight smile, but a smile nonetheless, and my racing heart slowed down momentarily.
"I'm glad you're okay," I said, now that I had her attention again, and she looked my way with a softened expression. "Kind of okay. But you know... okay."
Thankfully, she knew what I meant and her hand tightened around mine.
"I'm glad you came," she returned, and I couldn't look away even if I tried. She was always able to trap me with a single gaze.
With a tug of her hand, she motioned for me to sit on the edge of her bed, so I did. And then she began to ask me about my vacation, what I'd been up to this past month, how my parents were... basically anything and everything except for the case. And it was understandable, since she was reminded of it all the time. If I could be a form of escapism for her, so be it. It was the least I could do.
We spoke for hours until the nurse came in to let me know visiting hours were over and I'd have to come back tomorrow. With a regretful sigh, I got up from my seat on her bedside and stretched my limbs.
"Where are you staying?" she asked, a slight frown on her lips.
I smiled awkwardly, realising I didn't think that far ahead. "I'm not gonna lie, I don't know. I came straight here. There's gotta be a hotel or something in this town, right?"
She nodded and flicked her hand to the shelves on the other side of the room. "You should stay in my room in the inn. Key's in my bag over there."
"Oh, I don't have to do that–"
"Y/N, it's not like I'm going to be staying there anytime soon," she cut me off, smiling halfheartedly. "Please."
I chewed on my lip and nodded, giving in. When I grabbed her keys from her bag, I stopped by her bedside and gave her a supportive smile.
"I'll back first thing in the morning, if you don't mind," I said, and she finally gave me a smile that reached her eyes.
"I'd like that."
I nodded, resting a hand on hers and squeezing comfortingly. "Goodnight."
Though I knew Jane was okay, I still couldn't stop myself from thinking about her all night. The sight of her wounds and the broken expression on her face was enough to keep me awake. And the guilt that came with it all... why couldn't I have just picked up my damn phone?
As promised, I returned to Jane's hospital room the next morning, this time bringing some breakfast snacks from the hospital cafeteria since I knew the food would be much better than whatever they were serving her. Judging by the content expression on her face when I gave it to her, I was right.
When she finished eating, she was able to sit up slightly and move over on her bed, urging for me to join her and watch some TV with her. There was no way I was going to turn down that offer, so I slid next to her and kept a packet of sliced apples between us as we watched whatever was playing on the TV.
About halfway through watching, she spoke up randomly, taking me by surprise.
"When are you leaving?"
I tore my gaze from the screen and realised she was staring at me with intense green eyes.
"When you're well enough to," I answered truthfully.
She looked down to her hands. "You don't have to stay with me. You can go."
I studied her profile, knowing it was the wrong time to appreciate how stunning she looked even when she was makeup-free, sporting a bed head and tired.
"Do you want me to go?" I asked softly, afraid I may have overstepped.
She was quick to shake her head slightly, finally lifting her gaze to meet mine with glossy ones. "No."
I nodded, trying very hard not to smile, cleared my throat and grabbed her hand. "Then I'm not leaving. I'll be right here until you get better and I can take you home."
A ragged breath escaped her lips as she nodded in response. We both looked back to the TV and I noticed she didn't let go of my hand, her fingers warm to the touch and giving me goosebumps at the contact. But I wouldn't have had it any other way.
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