#but when I'm away from Dublin all I can do is miss it and imagine it in my head

[ophelias-last-flower]

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[legends-of-time]

The Journey of Living at Downton

Chapter 15: April 1919

Masterlist

The preparation for Mr Crawley's and Miss Swire's wedding is underway. Everyone is very excited, everyone except Emma and Lady Mary. The latter as the love of her life is marrying someone else and the former is because of the news of the spread of the Spanish flu.

Sybil had not been convinced by her sisters' arguments against marrying Billy, which leads to contentious arguments.

"But why announce it tonight all of a sudden?" Lady Mary asks Sybil, looking at her through the mirror on her vanity, where she sits. Anna is tidying her hair.

"He's got a job at the Shipyard in Southampton. He heard today it's a real chance." Sybil replies from where she stands in the middle of the room. Emma had tidied away and now only stands next to Sybil.

"Let him go to Southampton and then you can use the calm to consider." Lady Mary declares. Sybil scoffs.

"Mary doesn't want you to be trapped before you're completely sure." Lady Edith mediates from a chair in the room.

Sybil is frustrated by her sisters. "But I am sure! How many times do I have to say it? Anna, tell them."

"Lady Mary's right. It's a very big thing to give up your whole world." Anna says, having now finished Lady Mary's hair.

"Thank you. Listen to her if you won't listen to me." Lady Mary mutters as she puts on her gloves.

"Well, what about Emma! She's going to Dublin to marry Branson." Sybil retorts. Emma looks at her with wide eyes before looking at everyone's shocked faces.

"You're what?" Comes from Lady Edith.

"Emma?" Lady Mary asks.

"Um... y-yes that's the plan but not until Sybil is sorted." Is Emma's stumbled reply.

"You're marrying the chauffeur." Lady Edith says, still surprised.

"Actually, he's a journalist now." Emma retorts. Why had she said it like it's something wrong?

"And what will you be doing?" Lady Mary asks. It hurts Emma to hear the doubt and judgment in the woman's voice.

"Nursing."

"Anyway, I'm not giving up my world!" Sybil interrupts, looking at Emma apologetically. "They want to give me up. That's their affair. I'm perfectly happy to carry on being friends with everyone."

"Married to a shipbuilder?" Lady Mary comments.

"Yes. Though technically he's an engineer, which sounds better for Granny." Sybil sits down on the bed, frustrated. "We're going to tell Papa tonight." They all stare at her in shock except Emma who already knows this.

""We"?" Lady Edith echoes. "You mean, you and Mr Prior?"

"He's coming in after dinner."

"But what will Papa do?"

"I imagine he'll call the Police." The eldest Crawley daughter remarks.

Sybil sniffs and shakes her head.

——

Emma leaves the room with Anna to go downstairs to prepare to help with dinner.

"You didn't tell me about this!" Anna hisses at Emma.

"Well, I'm telling you now!" Emma replies. She honestly feels bad that she never mentioned any of this to Anna or any of the others downstairs. She should probably get on with that.

"Have you even told Gemma?"

Emma winces. "No, Lady Sybil only knows because she was there when Mr Branson proposed and, well, Lady Mary was an accident."

"You don't have to defend yourself," Anna reassures her. "I just thought you'd tell me about things like this, like I tell you about Mr Bates." There's the disappointment hitting you.

"I know and I'm sorry, I never intended to hurt you," Emma replies.

"It's nice to hear. About time you found someone." Anna beams at her.

"Oh, shut up."

The two giggle with each other.

——

Thomas stands outside Mr Carson's Pantry looking distressed.

"Thomas?" Emma asks as she approaches him.

"I don't know what I'm going to do Emma. I don't know what I'm going to do." Thomas replies.

Emma places a comforting hand on his arm, frowning. "Mr Carson is telling you to leave."

"He's running out of patience. What I'm going to do?" Thomas wonders as they walk out of the back door and into the Courtyard.

"You show him how indispensable you are, show how helpful you are. Surely, they'll help you then." Emma urges him. She lets out a series of coughs.

Thomas gazes at her worriedly. "Are you all right?"

She waves him away. "It's just bit of a cold."

"If you're sure..."

Emma rolls her eyes. "I am. Nothing's been coughed up." She smirks and he shakes his head at her.

"Is this a bad time to mention my engagement?" She tries to say jokingly but also nervously, dreading a negative reaction.

Thomas looks at her in surprise. "Your engagement?"

"Yes, I'm marrying Mr Branson, we're going to Dublin," Emma explains.

"When did this happen? Why didn't you tell me?" Thomas interrogates.

Emma rolls her eyes again. "Oh, not you too. I've already had a telling off from Anna. I'm dreading telling Gemma."

Thomas snorts before he sobers up. "I think I'll miss you, Emma."

"You better Thomas. And you also better write to me cause you're not getting rid of me that easily." Emma behests.

"Of course not." Thomas chuckles.

——

Emma slips Billy into the servants' quarters through the back door after the family had eaten and guides him up the stairs to the Drawing room door. During dinner, there had been talk of Mrs Crawley's charity she's part of settling in refugees that had been displaced by the war.

"This is where I leave you," Emma says.

"Thank you, Emma. Thank you for everything." Billy clasps her shoulder briefly.

"Of course. Good luck."

Billy opens the door and enters purposefully. He leaves the door open but Emma doesn't want to be seen so she lingers just around the corner, to be there for whatever happens.

"Yes?" Lord Grantham asks.

"I'm here." Billy declares to, likely, Sybil.

"So I can see." His Lordship replies.

Emma hears movement and then Sybil starts talking quietly, she sounds as if she's right next to Billy. "I don't think this is such a good idea. We mustn't worry Granny."

Emma is beginning to agree with her. Was this really going to go as well as they hoped?

"You've asked me to come, and I've come," Billy replies.

"Would someone please tell me what is going on, or have we all stepped through the looking glass?" The Dowager questions.

"Your grandmother has as much right to know as anybody else."

"Why don't I find that reassuring?" In any other situation, Emma would have found that response funny.

Sybil and Billy begin to explain their plans to marry. Soon Lady Mary is facing her father's ire when she explains that she knew that there is a relationship between his youngest daughter and a man that convalescenced at Downton.

"What do you mean, "you knew"?" His Lordship inquires in shock.

"I hoped it would blow over. I didn't want to split the family when Sybil might still wake up." His eldest defends.

"And all that time you were in my home, convalescencing and acting as if you need our help when you've been seducing my daughter behind my back?" Lord Grantham harshly accuses.

"I have not been pretending!" Billy snaps back. "And I've not seduced anyone! Give your daughter some credit for knowing her own mind!"

"How dare you speak to me in that tone. You will leave at once." His Lordship orders.

"Oh, Papa!" Sybil sighs, exasperated.

"This is a folly! A ridiculous, juvenile madness!" Lord Grantham exclaims.

"Sybil, what do you have in mind?" The Dowager suddenly asks, filling Emma with hope.

"Mama, this is hardly—"

"No. She must have something in mind. Otherwise, she wouldn't have summoned him here tonight." His mother interrupts.

"Thank you, Granny." Sybil goes on to explain. "Yes, we do have a plan. Billy has got a job as an engineer at the Shipyard. I'll stay until after the wedding; I don't want to steal their thunder. But after that, I'll go to Southampton."

"To live with him? Unmarried?" Lady Grantham asks scandalised.

"I'll live with his mother while the bans are read." Sybil corrects. "And then we'll be married... And I'll get a job as a nurse."

"What does your mother make of this?" Emma can only assume the Dowager is asking Billy.

"If you must know, she thinks we're very foolish." Billy reluctantly answers.

The Dowager chuckles. "So at least we have something in common."

"I won't allow it! I will not allow my daughter to throw away her life!" Lord Grantham bellows. Emma can hear him storming across the room.

"You can posture it all you like, Papa, it won't make any difference!" Sybil loudly argues.

"Oh, yes, it will."

"How? I don't want any money and you can hardly lock me up until I die! I'll say goodnight. But I can promise you one thing, tomorrow morning nothing will have changed. Billy." Sybil then steps out of the room with Billy following a second later.

The three of them move to the Outer Hall to avoid being heard.

"Golly, that was something," Sybil mutters, rubbing her forehead.

Her fiancé places his hand on her back. "At least they know now, we're not hiding."

"I suppose."

Emma blinks feeling dizzy but shakes it off. "He's right, now you can plan in the open."

Sybil nods though still looks upset from the poor response from her family.

——

The next day in the Servants' Hall, Mr Bates reading a book with Jane a couple of seats down knitting. Miss O'Brien and Emma sit on either side of Thomas. Gemma sits on Emma's left sewing. Emma had eventually told Gemma about Tom, who thankfully took it well and was not upset with Emma not saying anything.

"Can't have expected to live here free forever." Miss O'Brien says to Thomas as he lights a cigarette. Emma tries to keep how she feels about the cigarette from her face.

"I didn't expect to get booted out." Thomas retorts.

"You'll have to find some work."

Thomas breathes out the cigarette smoke. "It's not that easy. Every Tom, Dick, and Harry's looking for work these days and they don't all have a hand like a Jules Verne experiment."

"I told him that he needs to show this lot what they're missing, try and get a job here if all else fails," Emma says. She feels tired and lets out a couple of coughs, which she blames on the cigarette smoke.

She hears someone walking into the Servants' Hall and turns to see Billy enter. She goes over to him. "Billy, what are you..."

"I came to see Sybil," Billy tells her.

"I don't think you'll be able to do that right now," Emma replies softly.

"Mr Prior, I know it wasn't easy last night," Anna says walking over to them.

"We should've spoken out long ago," Billy says.

Daisy places a teacup down at the head of the table. "Spoken out about what? Who are you?"

"My name is Billy Prior and Lady Sybil and I are getting married," Billy announces to the room. Mr Carson enters and those sitting stand.

"Have you no shame?" Mr Carson practically hisses.

"I'm sorry you feel like that, Mr Carson. You're a good man." Billy says to him as the rest of them sit back down. "But no, I have no shame. In fact, I have great pride in the love of that young woman and I will strive to be worthy of it."

Mr Carson can't seem to deal with this and walks over to his chair to sit as he dismisses Billy. "I will not disgrace myself by discussing the topic, and nor will anyone else. Now, if you will go, Mr Prior, we will continue with our day."

"I'll be at the Grantham Arms in the Village until Lady Sybil is ready to make her departure. I bid you all a good day." And with that Billy leaves.

"Is it really true—" Jane tries to ask but Mr Carson puts up his hand to silence her.

"Please. I have asked for silence and silence I will have."

——

"Your threats are hollow, don't you see? "I won't be received in London. I won't be welcome at court." How do I make you understand? I couldn't care less." Sybil argues after Lord Grantham had relentlessly attempted to convince her to leave Billy as he, his youngest daughter and Emma stand in Sybil's room. Sybil had asked Emma to be here as moral support against her father but Emma feels she can't get a word in edgewise in the battle of wills between father and daughter.

Lord Grantham is about to reply when the Dowager knocks and enters.

"I do hope I'm interrupting something." His mother utters as she closes the door and walks over to them.

"I only wish you were, but I seem to be getting nowhere." His Lordship mutters in irritation. Emma gives him an irritated look that he doesn't seem to see. "Have you seen Cora?"

"Ah-ha. She's lying down, and can we blame her?" The Dowager replies before turning to her youngest grandchild. "Now, Sybil, dear, this sort of thing is all very well in novels, but in reality, it can prove very uncomfortable. And while I am sure Prior has many virtues..." her son is about to protest, "well, no, no. He served his country and apparently is a good enough engineer."

"I will not give him up!" Sybil yells. Emma winces at the noise and rubs her head. Maybe she should lie down herself.

"Don't be rude to your grandmother." Her father snaps.

"No, she's not being rude, just wrong." The Dowager retorts.

Sybil sighs then turns to her father. "This is my offer: I will stay one week to avoid the impression I've run away, and because I don't want to spoil Matthew's wedding. And then we will marry in Southampton and whoever wishes to visit will be very welcome."

"Out of the question."

"Will you forbid Mary and Edith?" Sybil challenges.

Her father opens his mouth to reply but his mother cuts him off. "No, don't, don't. Don't say anything you may have to retract."

Lord Grantham acknowledges and goes for a calmer approach. "Know this: there will be no more money. From here on in, your life will be very different."

"Well, bully for that," Sybil replies resolutely.

Emma lets a loud sigh causing the others to look at her. She had increasingly become tired and her head is hurting.

"Emma are you all right?" Sybil asks concerned.

Emma shakes herself out of it. "Yes of course."

"Perhaps you should lie down," Sybil tells her.

"Fine but I'll be well enough to serve dinner. Don't you worry."

"I do not believe dinner is one of our highest priorities right now." The Dowager remarks sarcastically.

——

Emma knows she needs to inform Mrs Hughes about her impending resignation and goes in search of the woman. She can't find her in her Sitting room so tries Mr Carson's Pantry. She walks in to find Mrs Hughes helping an obviously unwell Mr Carson to stand.

"Oh, very well, I'll ask him, but only on condition you go to bed." Mrs Hughes is saying to him as Emma knocks and opens the door.

"Oh, is this a bad time?" Emma asks. "I was hoping to speak with Mrs Hughes."

Mrs Hughes shakes her head. "It's fine, Emma. I'll speak to you in a moment." She leaves to help Mr Carson to his room. Emma frowns, hoping this is not the Spanish flu.

Mrs Hughes returns to her Sitting room and Emma informs her of her plans.

Mrs Hughes stares at her in surprise before recovering. "Well, congratulations though it sounds like a big step."

"It is a big step Mrs Hughes but I believe it to be the right one," Emma replies strongly.

"Well as you are sure, I am happy for you." Mrs Hughes says, smiling.

"Thank you, Mrs Hughes." Emma then lets out an exhausted sigh and rubs her forehead. The stress of everything seems to be getting to her.

"Is everything all right, Emma?" Mrs Hughes asks concerned.

Emma shakes her head. "Sorry yes, I've just been feeling tired. What with the whole Lady Sybil business. But I'll be fine to serve dinner."

"If you're sure."

"I am."

Mrs Hughes looks reluctant to agree with her.

——

Mr Molesley is brought in to serve dinner as Mr Carson is unwell. Emma watches Anna give Mr Molesley the rundown of the wines.

"Mr Carson likes to serve two white wines, which you should open and decant just before they eat," Anna explains. "A light one for the hors d'oeuvres, then a heavy one with the soup. Keep that going for the fish, and then change to Claret, which you should really decant now. There's a pudding wine, and after that whatever they want in the Drawing room with their coffee."

"Blimey, it's a wonder they make it up the stairs." Mr Molesley remarks. Emma laughs quietly to herself as she leans heavily on the door frame.

"They don't drink much of any of it. Now, let me show you the decanters. These four..."

——

Anna and Emma carry the trays to go upstairs and find a nervous Mr Molesley in the Server room fiddling with the wines.

"You quite right, Mr Molesley?" Anna asks.

"Yes, I just want to be absolutely sure that this is the lighter wine." Mr Molesley pours himself a glass.

"Why does it matter as long as it's white?" Emma asks confused. She didn't really get the big deal about it.

Mr Molesley disagrees. "No. I believe in starting the way you mean to go on. Don't want to get off on the wrong foot." He grabs a couple of bottles and barges past the two maids, who dive out the way.

——

"I'm glad you're here, Sybil, dear. I was afraid you'd have a tray in your room." The Dowager says to her youngest grandchild. Emma and Anna stand on different sides of the Dining room. Emma stands by the door while Anne lingers in the corner behind the Dowager and Miss Swire. Mr Molesley goes around pouring wine into their drinks.

"Maybe you should have done." Lord Grantham says snidely. Emma winces, she has the worst headache.

"Why?" Sybil counters. "I'm not eloping like a thief in the night. I might have once, but Mary and Edith talked me out of it." Her sisters stare at her in alarm for outing them.

"Oh? The plot thickens." The Dowager quips.

Emma sighs, the room spinning ever so slightly as she glances at Mrs Crawley as she speaks.

"After all, Sybil's had enough time to think about it—" Mrs Crawley tries to contribute.

"Mother, it is not for us to have an opinion." Her son tells her. Mr Molesley then falters in pouring Mr Crawley's wine, Emma notes that he seems paler than usual and looks sickly; she has to admit that she feels the same, she'll lie down once the meal is over. "Mr Molesley, are you quite well?"

"I-I'm all right, thank you, Sir."

"I don't believe you are."

"The awful truth is, I'm not quite all right and I'm afraid I'm going to ask you to excuse me." Lady Grantham interrupts. Emma sees how pale she is.

"I'm so sorry." Her husband says. The men stand as Her Ladyship gets up from the table. Emma snaps to attention and pulls the Dining room door open. "Would you like us to call Dr Clarkson?"

"No, no, darling, it's too late."

"He's coming anyway, Your Lordship, for Mr Carson," Anna informs them.

"I-I'll bring him up when he arrives." Lady Edith adds.

"I can sleep in my Dressing room." His Lordship says as his wife leaves.

——

Everyone seems to be dropping like flies. Emma finds Mr Molesley groaning into a handkerchief, not looking well so they get Jane to take him to the Servants' Hall so Dr Clarkson can have a look at him and Emma and Anna quickly return to the Dining room to continue serving the family.

"The Spanish flu has found its way to Yorkshire." Lord Grantham says as they walk in, Emma to the side of the room while Anna carries the wine to pour.

"And to Downton. Dr Clarkson says he's got ten cases already." Mrs Crawley says. Emma hopes that that isn't what she has.

Anna pours the Dowager's drink and Lord Grantham takes notice. "Ah, I thought Molesley had joined the temperance league."

"I'm afraid he's been taken ill, Milord. I am sorry." Anna replies.

"Molesley, too? Good heavens, everyone's falling like ninepins."

"Lavinia?" Lady Mary utters. Emma blearily looks over to see Miss Swire looking pale and swooning in her chair.

"Do you know, I'm not at all well either. I wonder if I could lay down for a minute?" Miss Swire replies.

"Of course. Come to my room. They'll have lit the fire by now." Lady Mary and Miss Swire get up from the table. The men stand as they exit and Emma holds the door open.

"Excuse me." Miss Swire mutters.

"Do you think we should take her home?" Mrs Crawley wonders just after the two women have left.

"No, let her rest for a moment." Her son shakily replies.

"Well, I-I think I should go and help." Mrs Crawley gets up and exits. This leaves Emma, the Dowager, Lord Grantham, Anna, Mr Crawley and Sybil the last ones in the room.

"Wasn't there a masked ball in Paris when cholera broke out? Half the guests were dead before they left the ballroom." The Dowager comments.

"Thank you, Mama. That's cheered us up no end." His Lordship remarks irritably.

Emma feels herself begin to swoon and tries shaking her head and blinking to wake herself up but it seems to make how she's feeling worse.

"Emma? Are you all right?" Sybil asks.

"Yes of course," Emma says but then begins to feel herself tip towards the floor.

The last thing she hears is Sybil crying, "Emma!" before everything goes black.

——

"Mmm..." Emma grumbles as she wakes up.

"Emma?" A voice calls.

"Mmm... what?" Emma opens her eyes to see that she's in a room upstairs, from what she can tell in her exhausted state, with Gemma and Sybil looking down at her. She realises it was Sybil she had heard.

"Oh, good you're awake." Gemma sighs in relief.

"I feel like crap." Emma groans.

"Now no need for language." Sybil chastises with a smile while dabbing Emma's forehead with a cloth. Emma realises then how sweaty and hot she feels.

"Whatever." Emma dismisses. "What happened?"

"You fainted," Gemma explains.

"I did?" She honestly doesn't remember doing that.

"Yes, it seems you have the Spanish flu," Sybil adds.

"What?!" Emma exclaims, trying to sit but gets too exhausted and has to lie down again. She's really an idiot for not noticing sooner.

"It's all right, lie down," Sybil reassures as she helps her. "Dr Clarkson says you're not too bad and will need nursing for a day or two."

"Wait didn't Miss Swire and Lady Grantham fall ill?" Emma recalls through her foggy mind.

"Yes, but they are doing fine for now," Sybil answers her.

"Would you like me to bring Mr Branson to you tomorrow?" Gemma asks.

Emma nods. "If you could please." She would like to see him just in case this kills her.

——

"Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" Emma wakes as Tom speaks. She sees him by the door along with Gemma, who's letting him in.

"I'll leave you two," Gemma says and closes the door after her.

"I can't help but feel how scandalous this is, being in a bedroom upstairs with you and unmarried." Emma wiggles her eyebrows.

Tom chuckles and walks over to a seat next to the bed she lies in. "Well, you must be getting better if you're making jokes.

The smile that had been growing on Emma's face drops. "We'll see."

"Oh?" He raises an eyebrow. "Something you know from the future?"

"Well, for one it shouldn't be called the Spanish flu as it actually originated in Kansas, America..." Emma explains. She feels it's ironic that she had watched a documentary all about the flu in the last year on her own time. "...but also, how it targeted the young and healthy and that things can easily change with this."

"Well, maybe it won't happen to you," Tom suggests.

"I hope so otherwise you won't be able to fulfil all those promises you made me." She gives him a smirk.

Tom laughs before sobering up. "Don't worry we will." He takes her hand and holds it.

——

No one's POV

Emma doesn't get any better and begins sweating profusely.

Thomas enters as Sybil and Gemma nurse Emma. "What can I bring to help?"

"Ice, to bring her temperature down," Gemma instructs. Thomas nods and immediately leaves to do so.

Emma seems only to be getting worse. She begins wheezing and her sweating is worse. She feels like death.

"Dear god," Lady Mary exclaims as she walks into the room, "has anyone told Branson she's like this?"

"She took a turn for the worse about half an hour ago, we haven't had the chance to," Sybil informs her sister.

Gemma enters with a fresh bowl of water and places a cloth over Emma's forehead. "There we are, Emma. That's better, isn't it?"

Lady Sybil whispers to Lady Mary, "She's been with her all night."

"Gemma, you must have a rest." Lady Mary urges.

"Not just now, Milady," Gemma argues. "If you don't mind, I want to see her through the worst if I can. Now, I'll just make this colder for you." Gemma dips the cloth in the water. Lady Mary takes Sybil aside.

"How is she, really? Tell me honestly."

"I can't yet," Sybil admits. "Dr Clarkson says we will know more in a few hours."

"Dear god."

——

Gemma continues to nurse Emma alone. She sits next to the bed, holding Emma's hand.

Emma turns her head towards Gemma, her sweat sticks her hair to her face. "Gemma? Is that you, Gemma?"

Gemma smiles. "Yes. It's me, Emma."

"You should see your family more you know. You never know when it's the last time..." Emma mutters hoarsely, sounding as if she's not all there.

"I'll see them soon, Emma. Don't you worry." Gemma responds tearfully.

Emma continues as if she had not heard her. "I miss mine. My mum, my dad, brother and sister. I miss them. You can't waste the time you have."

Gemma frowns. "But I thought you didn't know—"

"I miss them. I miss them so much." Emma is clearly still delirious.

Sybil enters. "How is she?"

"She slept and she seemed better, then suddenly the fever came back," Gemma replies distressed.

"You have been amazing for how you have looked after her, Gemma." Sybil comforts.

"But is it enough?"

"We do the best we can," Sybil says resolutely.

——

Dr Clarkson puts on his coat to leave. "I've given her the epinephrine."

"Doctor!" Gemma cries. Emma is gasping for air and her nose is bleeding. Sybil cleans her face with water from a bowl.

"Oh, no." Lady Mary gasps. "What does that mean?"

"It's a haemorrhage of the mucus membranes." Dr Clarkson explains. "It's, er, it's not unusual."

Sybil gets a bowl to Emma just in time as she vomits.

"It's all right, Emma. Don't worry. Don't worry a bit. Everything's going to be all right." Gemma tries to comfort her, stroking Emma's hair back.

Tom turns to Dr Clarkson. "Everything is not all right. How bad is it?"

"If she lasts through the night, she'll live." Dr Clarkson replies. Tom and Lady Mary absorb this shock. "What about the others?"

"Come with me." Lady Mary says.

"I'll be back shortly."

End of Outsider POV

——

It's the next day when Emma wakes up feeling better than she had been in days though she still feels weak.

"Emma, thank god." Tom cries happily. Emma sees that he and Gemma sit on either side of her in the bed.

"Tom? Gemma? What...?" Emma asks, her voice raspy. Gemma gives her a few sips of water.

"We feared the worst," Gemma says, "and when Miss Swire died—"

"Miss Swire died?" Emma interrupts. Oh no.

Gemma nods sadly. "Yes, last night." Poor Mr Crawley.

"And Her Ladyship?"

"On the mend."

"I'm thankful you're still here. With me." Tom says tearfully. He holds her hand.

Emma smiles at him lovingly and squeezes his hand. "Of course. You're not going to get rid of me that easily."

Tom laughs. "I wouldn't dream of it." He kisses her hand.

——

"Are you feeling more yourself?" Anna asks her when she visits. Emma is sitting up in bed. Anna had already told her about Jane leaving, which saddens Emma.

"A bit but I still feel weak," Emma replies.

"That's to be expected." Emma notices that Anna is a bit more fidgety than normal.

"What is it?"

"What?"

Emma raises an eyebrow. "You're fidgeting too much. What's going on?"

"You promise to keep this a secret?" Anna asks instead of answering.

Emma rolls her eyes. "I promise."

"Hmm." Anna looks hesitant but continues. "Well, Mr Bates and I are getting married in a registry in Ripon tomorrow morning."

Emma gasps. "Really?!"

Anna smiles. "Yes. We don't know what's going to happen but I want to stick by him, no matter what."

"As you should. I'm happy for you Anna." Emma slowly leans forward and the two share a hug.

"When's the funeral?" Emma asks once she's lying against the pillows again. She's probably not going to be able to lie in this bed again so she might as well take advantage.

"The funeral is on Monday," Anna tells her.

"Hopefully I can make it."

"Don't push yourself," Anna warns.

——

"Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust." Reverend Travis says and throws dirt on Miss Swire's coffin. They all are gathered in the grounds surrounding the Church in Downton Village for the funeral. "In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, who shall change our vile body that may be like unto his glorious body according to the mighty working whereby he is able to subdue all things to himself. Amen."

"Amen." Everyone echoes.

People slip off into groups or begin to head back to the house. Emma lingers and talks to Tom, her fiancé. She feels giddy even thinking of him as such.

"Should you be out so soon? You shouldn't overexert yourself." Tom frets.

Emma smiles at him indulgently. She isn't at her full strength but she feels well enough to come out for this. "I'm fine, Tom. I'll rest when we get back to the house."

"Will we go to Dublin soon?" Tom asks.

"Of course. As soon as possible."

Emma sees Lord Grantham speaking to Billy and Sybil, who seem to be about to leave when Lord Grantham stops them.

"Well, if I can't stop you, I see no profit in a quarrel." She hears him say as he approaches from behind him. His words fill her with hope. "You'll have a very different life from the one you might have lived, but if you're sure it's what you want."

Sybil looks at Billy with a smile. "I am."

"Then you may take my blessing with you, whatever that means."

Emma looks at Tom, who had followed and they beam at each other.

Sybil looks thrilled at his words. "Oh, Papa. It means more than anything!" She hugs him with delight. "More than anything!"

"If you mistreat her, I will personally have you torn to pieces by wild dogs." Her father says to Billy.

"I'd expect no less," Billy replies.

"Will you come for the wedding?" Sybil asks, clinging to Billy's hand.

"We'll see. We'll talk about that later." His Lordship replies. "And there'll be some money. But not much."

Sybil smiles and kisses him on the cheek. Sybil and Billy walk off hand in hand.

——

Emma and Tom walk through the back door and enter the servants' corridor.

"You are under arrest on the charge of wilful murder. You are not obliged to say anything unless you desire to do so. Whatever you say will be taken down in writing and may be given in evidence against you upon your trial." A man is saying. Emma sees all the servants loitering in the corridor, facing the Servants' Hall. She pulls her and Tom through to see Mr Bates and Anna talking to two unknown men.

"I understand." Mr Bates says and one man takes his wrist. Oh god, they're arresting him for murder.

"No. No—" Anna protests, trying to intervene.

Mr Bates pulls from her to let the Police cuff him. "Please... do whatever is required.

Emma watches as the couple whisper to each other before sharing a kiss.

"Come along, Sir." One of the officers says, pushing Anna out of the way and leading Mr Bates down the corridor, past them standing in the corridor. Emma clings to Tom's arm as she looks back at Anna after following the Police and Mr Bates with her eyes to see her standing in the Servants' Hall watching after them, lip trembling.

——

A/N: The end of season 2!! The plan is that I'll do a bit of a filler chapter before the beginning of season 3.

Please leave comments on how you're enjoying this story and what you think.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & Grace

Ava: Hey Grace: 👋 Ava: How'd it go with gym boy? Grace: 🤞 he's got the hint 👻 Ava: That good, huh Ava: how about the rest, you know, not boys? Grace: we so aren't here to talk about me Ava: Come on Ava: Give me some normal conversation right now Grace: !!!!!!!!! Grace: 100% not gonna be that bitch, talk to ME about what's going on in your oh so dramatic life! Grace: are you okay? Ava: Okay, okay Ava: I'll just come out with it Ava: no sugarcoating Grace: Duh 🚫🍫🍬🍭 Grace: it's not a cheat day Ava: 🤫🤫🤫 Ava: You wanna hear this hot, hot tea or nah Grace: obvs Ava: You'll be the least surprised so there's that Grace: 🚫😱😱😱 Ava: You know when you came here and then married guy couldn't come and then everything fizzled out? Ava: well, it actually did, for nearly a month Ava: but then he came back Grace: OMG Grace: it's literally the MOST 💖📽🎞 like FORGET before Ava: It really was Ava: remember when I got hit by that cyclist? Grace: that was so wild! OH was he the 🚴??? Ava: 😂 Ava: Imagine Grace: your otp Ava: But no, my parents were out of town Ava: and he came to the hospital, to make sure I was okay Ava: and he took me home and looked after me Grace: I'm like about to cry???!!! that's so Grace: 😍😍 Ava: Me too Ava: and of course, I had to go on Holiday like immediately after so that was shit but since then we've been talking and Ava: he's divorcing his wife Grace: I TOLD YOU HE WAS PURE Ava: I know Ava: and I'm sorry I had to kinda lie to you Ava: but I accidentally let slip I had talked to you and he freaked and that's why he first left so Grace: Oh please, if I filmed a storytime about this ALL the comments would be calling me out as #fake Grace: I get it Ava: It does sound pretty unbelievable Ava: even more so if I actually tell you who he is Grace: are you GOING TO???!! 😱😱😱 Ava: May as well, I've had to tell Nancy Ava: Parents and Buster to go Grace: Ugh! so sorry babes Ava: I couldn't tell you before 'cos they kinda know him Ava: knew him Ava: he was one of Buster's friends from School Ava: and his crazy wife is the main girl who bullied Nancy so Ava: that was fun Grace: Really?! wtf Grace: Chelsea is like Grace: so weirdly small Ava: That's why we call 'em villages, even though you're in a big city, the actual communities are ridiculously close-knit, for better and worse Ava: oh and Ava: make it weirder still Ava: you remember that boy from my party, Teddy? Grace: UM obvs I never forget a 💋 Ava: Well, that's his brother Grace: !!!!!!!!!!!!! Grace: do they look alike cos 🧸 is 😍😍 like 🙏🙏 Ava: Kinda Ava: [sends a cute photo he would've been able to send to the fake profile] Grace: oh Grace: my Grace: god Ava: I know Ava: 😩😍 Grace: did he edit his 👀??! I'm so shook 💙 Ava: No, I've seen them up close Ava: they're actually that unreal Grace: I can't even Ava: Guess what Grace: ?? Ava: He said he loves me Grace: NO WAY Grace: 😭😭😭😭 Ava: I know, I know Ava: I can't even Grace: so are you like a thing™ now? Ava: Yeah Ava: that's why I'm telling everyone Grace: Your parents are gonna be so Ava: Ugh Ava: it's going to be a whole thing Ava: with all of them Grace: mhhmmm Grace: like I feel like I know the answer but how did Nancy take it?? Ava: She just Ava: does my head in at the best of times and this was no exception, sadly Grace: at least Buster can't be telling ANYONE how to live their lives Grace: especially 😍💖 Ava: Watch him try though Ava: I'm expecting it though, they'll have to get over it on their own time Grace: 🙄 Grace: I feel that, Ri always thinks she can tell me something Ava: It's so Grace: IKR Grace: full offense babes I'm gonna listen to Janis before you & like no Ava: It's gonna be hellish but they can't do anything about it Grace: 🙏💜🤞 Ava: unless they do in which case bye and feel free to go through my wardrobe 🤷 Grace: duh Grace: but watch me also take your man Ava: 😏 cheek Grace: my crazy would look 😇 next to his ex's Grace: love that for me Ava: 'Til I haunt you crazier Grace: so scared obvs Ava: 😒 Ava: I only just got him, you can't be stealing him Grace: so sorry but like gotta get the full set on that fam now Ava: You better 🙏 my parents take it that personal Grace: 😇🙏💜 Grace: Jesus is totally my bae so Ava: and God's favourite son Ava: leave mine alone 😉 Grace: 😂😂 Ava: So you're not mad at me now, yeah? Grace: lowkey 💔 but not mad Ava: awh please Grace: ILY bitch you know it Ava: ily too 💙 Grace: & now I don't have to 👻💔 his brother so Grace: no way he'll be hitting me up after this Ava: Oh yeah, you're welcome for doing your dirtywork Grace: 💜😂💜 Ava: Has he hit you up then? 👀 Grace: 🤐🤐🤐 Ava: After I just poured my heart out? Ava: Rudeness Grace: you're in a 📽🎞💖 I'm in a 📽🎞😱 starring my crazy Ava: Girl, please Grace: I'm so serious Grace: & so over it Ava: You're not crazy Grace: I'm not not Grace: ask gym boy, but like don't Ava: I'm not gonna sleuth on you, don't worry Grace: if you had you'd see 🧸 on my pics hitting the 💜 Ava: Cute Ava: he must like you or he'd air you Ava: it's not unheard of Grace: like I said, thanks for putting that work in for me babes Ava: 😒 why not talk to him Ava: you don't have to see him 24/7 Grace: well duh I'm not about to move in with you Grace: but that's not why I can't Ava: ? Grace: he's like Grace: & I'm like Grace: It's not gonna be a thing Ava: You can't be friends? Grace: 😂😂 no Grace: that's as terrifying OMG Ava: 🙄 he is NOT scary Ava: though he is gonna hate me now probably so loyalties Grace: UM yeah he is Grace: he's nice & so I'm scared of him Grace: @ gym boy too Ava: 🤔 Grace: ugh whatever Ava: You're a nice person, you should hang with other nice people Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: I've got friends he doesn't need to be one Ava: Okay Ava: not my otp, not gonna push that hard Grace: or ours its fine Grace: he won't be 😭😭😭 Ava: 'Course Ava: gonna have bigger problems to deal with, lbr Ava: 😬 Grace: yeah exactly Grace: maybe we can bond when the wife murders you but like Grace: black isn't my fave tbh can't 🤞 I'll serve my best look Ava: Funny 😏 Ava: she's actually 'out of the country' rn so you should probably watch your back 🔪🔪 Grace: you're so not gonna come visit me now you're 😍😍😍 are you? Grace: are you even doing holiday 2? Ava: time is getting away from us Ava: summer holiday standard Ava: it lowkey has not been organized so god knows now, I wouldn't be mad if it didn't but I wouldn't not go, I guess Grace: depends how they take your homewrecker status Ava: Yep, cheers 👍 Grace: people are shady Ava: Sure Ava: but my actual friend friends will know what's up Ava: everyone else chats about us anyway Grace: true Grace: shoutout to the fam for that one Ava: at least this one is something I actually did so Ava: oh well Grace: anyone who has a clue about his ex will know it's not even you Grace: like sorry hun you killed that 💍 yourself Ava: I'm not too fussed, it's my last year 💁 Grace: #priorities Ava: Exactly Grace: still so triggered by the idea of going back though thanks Grace: school is the WORST Ava: tell me about it Ava: won't miss that place Ava: Chelsea in general moreso but it isn't like I'll be a million miles away Grace: unlike me always a ✈ away Ava: Do you reckon you'll stay in Dublin? Grace: I guess Grace: where else would I go? Ava: You aren't going to make like Billie and Nancy and bounce then? Grace: being a or sleeping with models isn't very likely for me, babes Ava: Models are usually weird looking anyways Ava: oops accidental shade at your sister 🙊 Ava: don't tell Grace: thanks? I think Grace: shade her all you want, I'm about it Ava: How many times have you seen her kid? Grace: Like none Grace: we might get christmas but Ava: this family is messy Ava: watch me get lectured like it ain't Grace: preach Grace: maybe I shouldn't stay here Ava: you could stay or go wherever Ava: everywhere needs beauticians Grace: not Chelsea though, I'd run into your boyfriend's wife Grace: obvs can't escape anyone there Ava: 😂 truly Ava: I don't wanna be far away from the fam Ava: cracked as they are Ava: but that's just me Ava: I guess it isn't automatically selfish to move yourself halfway 'cross the globe hmm Grace: same though, I even miss Junie & like ?? why Grace: never saw him when we lived in the same house Ava: yeah Ava: that whole situation still fucks me off I Ava: idk Ava: I know it's not the kid's fault but I can barely even look at pictures of her Grace: Ri never should've done it Grace: like he didn't need a kid that bad Grace: obvs he didn't actually need one at all but nobody NEEDS one Ava: If they'd been together any amount of time Ava: Junior wasn't 20 fucking years old Ava: it was really stupid Ava: Buster said but oh well Grace: Demi is so Grace: I can't Ava: This family can't seem to help but add more fucked up people into its sphere Ava: like Ro hadn't just brought Drew back, AGAIN Grace: Getting pregnant by accident is one thing, like it's stupid but okay Grace: they planned that Ava: This family has way too many baby hangups dating back to nan Ava: can't blame her for all of this but break the cycle, someone, damn Grace: literally had my contraception on 🔒 since I was 13 thank you Ava: 'Accident' is some bullshit 9/10 times tbh Ava: you knew it was a matter of time, even if you don't know you knew it Grace: @ my mum & dad so hard Ava: and mine, they say the twins were an accident but they probably would've broke up if they hadn't have had them at that time so Grace: mhmmm Ava: ugh Ava: I'm just heated knowing how hard I'm gonna have to defend this Ava: like I've got myself pregnant Grace: don't even joke, she trapped that poor boy so hard like Ava: seriously, he probably never wants kids again Ava: not that I've asked because it's been like a month or so and I'm not psychotic, thanks Grace: do you? not now obvs Ava: I don't know Ava: like, don't tell my mother but I don't actually meticulously plan every aspect of my life Ava: if I ended up at a place and time in my life where it felt right, I could see it Ava: but if I ended up living a different life where they wouldn't fit, I wouldn't and I wouldn't be 💔 about that Grace: 😂🤐 Ava: Do you? Grace: girl, I'm too freaked out to let a boy date me, I don't think it's gonna happen Ava: you won't be 16 forever Ava: and if Ro can manage it Ava: your mum and Drew are probably the only people to see her vaguely undressed in her life Grace: idk sometimes it's all I want & sometimes it's the WORST thing I could think of Ava: I get that Ava: I don't think its a thing you can overthink, 'cos it's not usually right or wrong Ava: so people just do it and have to deal, better or worse Grace: Yeah Grace: maybe I'll get like that with dating Grace: or you know, get so lonely that I won't care that people always leave Ava: 😔 Ava: You'll get there, whether there is living your best life with or without Ava: I'm defs getting left after this fiasco so I'll come 😭 to you in a few no doubt Ava: we're walking Frank rn, so gonna enjoy this whilst it lasts 👌🥰 Grace: UM no! He LOVES you remember, you'll come at me with your 😍 more like Ava: 🤞🤞 Grace: 🙏💜

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: [Let us say that some boys on the bus were going hard with being dicks because duh, shit always goes down on the bus] Janis: 3 of those lads have sent me dick pics Janis: say the word, like Grace: only 3? 💔 Janis: What can I say? Janis: Not got the pull I used to, obvs Grace: yeah same Janis: Yeah Janis: well, there's comfort in knowing you're always one #scandal away from being old news at this school, yeah Grace: mhmm I'm like so comforted rn Janis: Not my forte Janis: I'll work on getting the remaining 2 dicks Janis: revenge porn, I could do Grace: 🤞💜🙏 Janis: I hope the rest of the insults you've heard today have been more creative than that poor showing at least Grace: Duh of course they haven't 🙄 Janis: Gutting Janis: should've paid more attention in English, lads Grace: [sends her some of the quality content] Grace: that'll be easier when I'm not there to be like TOTALLY distracting obvs Janis: 😑 Janis: How dry Janis: 💀 or 👻 Grace: I mean like catch them at 20 still trying to pass Grace: much as I wanna kms Janis: True that Janis: only here past junior cert to get more fingering experience Grace: ugh Janis: I know Janis: romance is dead Janis: is there anything I can actually do though? Grace: get that as a matching tattoo with barista boy? no 👌👌 Grace: idk cos idk what I can even do soooo Grace: my life is just over Janis: I'll float the idea Janis: might be a bit mainstream Janis: yeah but is that such a bad thing Janis: was pretty tragic, right? Grace: can you not Janis: I'm not taking the piss Janis: I'm being real Grace: & I'm not in the mood for a life revamp atm Grace: or your advice Janis: I'm not trying to be a guru either Grace: well you don't know what you're talking about so that's a relief Janis: Alright Janis: not said I do either Janis: sorry I don't, if I knew how to avoid scandals, I could sell that shit for a high price Grace: just stop Grace: I could care less that I'm #cancelled Grace: it's not even Janis: Go on then Janis: I know you aren't upset over that idiot Grace: Duh Grace: he's the WORST but I knew that already Janis: and give a shit about everyone talking shit, apparently Janis: so, what is it? Grace: it's real if I say it Janis: Is that why you're not saying anything Janis: I know it doesn't stop the talk but some people might listen Janis: what don't you want to make real? Grace: I don't want people to listen, I literally don't want anyone to know Grace: I don't even wanna know, I wish I didn't Janis: Grace Janis: what are you talking about? Grace: I'm literally the worst person, I didn't wanna have his baby & now god has like cursed me forever Janis: Babe, God is NOT a subscriber Janis: tell me Grace: if you make me 😂 I will 😭 Janis: That would make things feel more normal Janis: but I'll calm my comedy genius Janis: you haven't grown another head and I don't think our animal have been slaughtered Grace: thanks babes Grace: but I'd rather have another head than this Janis: More to contour, I get it Janis: Kinda Janis: so it must be bad Grace: Yeah Grace: like I said, my life is over Grace: it's not even started & it's done Janis: Did you want the baby Janis: I know you said not HIS but like Janis: it'd be understandable to be in two minds, even after making a decision about it Grace: not now but I didn't know that'd mean not ever Janis: What? Grace: it's not just that I wasn't pregnant this time Grace: I can't be Janis: Ever? Janis: The Doctor told you? Grace: Ever Grace: the doctor said I'm going through the fucking menopause, like is nan even?! Janis: the menopause Janis: is that even possible Janis: fuck Grace: I don't think the doctor is allowed to drop fake news on me Grace: like maybe there's another storytime coming Janis: When did you find this out? Grace: I went to the doctors right after I delivered my fake news to him Janis: Jesus, Grace Janis: How are you in School Janis: why? Grace: I told you, I don't want this to be happening Grace: I'm freaking out, the symptoms are crazy Janis: Is it just pure bad luck Janis: it can't be like..reversed Grace: there's like no way to undo it Janis: Shit Janis: I'm sorry Janis: that is huge Grace: yeah me too Grace: the pity party this fam would throw would be huge Grace: along with the guestlist of all their accidental babies Janis: and we have enough birthdays with all those accidental kids so Janis: Obviously, no need to explain why you're keeping it to yourself Grace: I can't do this Grace: be this Janis: I don't think you have a choice Janis: well, you don't Grace: is it my fault though? all the binging I used to do Grace: Ro got to have a kid Janis: Of course it ain't your fault Janis: this shit is unfair and random Grace: Yeah Janis: and it'll always be shit and unfair Janis: but you can still live your life, just different to how you've imagined Grace: I don't wanna live this life Janis: There's not an alternative Janis: but I can guarantee it's not gonna be as bad as you feel right now Grace: I was just starting to get my shit together, for god's sake Janis: I know Janis: but you still have the rest together Grace: HE'S the last boy that's ever gonna come near me, that alone makes me wanna die Janis: that's bollocks Janis: you've not got the plague Janis: socially, right now Janis: but who gives a fuck, yeah, the lads 'round here are not the be all in any way Grace: I literally live here Grace: what else am I gonna do go online and find boys who are into 👵? Janis: Boys that don't go to our school, would be a start Janis: ones that aren't likely to be fans of that prick, shouldn't be hard Janis: you're not going for 12 year olds, like Grace: I said don't make me 😂 Janis: It can't hurt Janis: except literally, maybe Grace: I've gotta get used to all the fucking aches and pains anyway ugh Janis: Any excuse for a spa day, you Grace: I'll lose your invite, don't even worry Janis: 💔😏 Janis: you should though Janis: do something that doesn't make you feel like 👵 Grace: casual infertility party Janis: not exactly what I was thinking but Janis: interesting take on the baby shower epidemic Janis: I'd come Grace: oh god don't, Rio's gonna have another one soon Janis: It'll be nice to not have to snatch it back from an OTT gay this time Janis: more chill Grace: unless I snatch it cos I go fully mental Janis: I'd recommend a less baby crazy target Grace: maybe I'll start pushing all the 🐈s around in a pram like oh hey this is my new vibe Janis: if you want your face clawed off Janis: they're pretty unsympathetic little bastards Grace: I literally didn't wanna be in this fam before what am I meant to do now?! ugh Janis: As much as it would be a laugh to ask Ri to surrogate again Janis: let's think of something a little less drastic for the time being Grace: like? Janis: like Janis: you can't disown us all, it'd take to long Janis: but you could not be around for a while Grace: 👌👌 except I have nowhere to go Grace: not trying to have a Q&A with my friends about this Janis: You're so lucky I'm the twin with brains Grace: rude Janis: what about going to see Ava for a hot sec Janis: she's not the barrage-you-with-questions type Grace: it's lowkey very unlikely her mum & dad would want me there though Janis: yeah but it's as unlikely they'll be about enough to notice you that hard Janis: everyone knows you're going through it right now, even if they don't actually know what IT really is Grace: okay yeah Grace: mum does, she'd let me go Janis: exactly, who actually gives a shit if you miss a week or so of school Janis: Ava could still go if she so desperately needs, you just need to chill Janis: away from here Grace: not me, school was the worst even before this Janis: One thing we can agree on Grace: don't like tell anyone, okay? Janis: No shit Janis: 'course I won't Grace: Even your boyfriend who you're so 💖😍😘 for & have no secrets from Janis: Even though you're being purposefully antagonizing rn Janis: I won't tell no one Grace: thanks Janis: It ain't even an ask Janis: so don't mention it Grace: 👌💜 Janis: I'll hook it up with her, no stress Grace: I'll handle mum Janis: and your packing Grace: at least I don't have to serve a look as hard when there's only 1 person there I'm avoiding as opposed to like ALL of Dublin Janis: safe to say you can give the #ootds a break too Janis: strictly loungewear, like Grace: mhmmm Janis: bit rude to avoid Ava though Janis: do I need to tell her you're getting in the guestroom and not coming out, like? Grace: oh please, I would never Janis: Who are you avoiding then? Grace: just a boy Janis: unlike you Grace: excuse you Janis: You'd have your exes all back 'round like a family reunion Janis: who's this boy, did you shit in his bed, what's the story Grace: 😱😱😱 Grace: I WOULD NOT Janis: 👌👌 you love a repeat Grace: I'm a hoe reformed 😇🙏 Janis: so that's why you're avoiding Janis: get a wimple, join a convent Grace: literally can't 💍 anyone but god now anyway so Grace: obvs that's what he wanted when he cursed me Janis: #whenbaeisposessive 😍 Janis: and don't talk shit, you don't have to promise you'll have your firstborn within the year when you get married, like Janis: not necessary Grace: whatever we're so off topic rn Janis: the topic of you shitting in some London lad's bed, 'cos you did not deny it Janis: let's get back on that Grace: OMG no! Grace: I'm 👵 not 🤢💀🤒😓💀 Grace: he's just a hookup, no drama Janis: just gonna run for cover if you 👀 him Janis: standard Janis: probably not lurking about her gaff unless you've really one-upped everyone and fucked your uncle 🤢 Grace: EW! Grace: I'm not even gonna 👀 him cos he's her bfs brother but like I didn't know that so Janis: that's funny Janis: soz Janis: 😂 when the incestuousness of it all happens without you even trying Grace: 🙄🙄 Janis: okay 🤐 Janis: but deffo avoid him Grace: duh Grace: the state of me & my life rn Janis: more like the state of that whole situation Janis: getting involved in that is not anyone's idea of relaxing Grace: obvs but that's not anything to do with him Grace: just like none of this #scandal involves you Janis: Think people know better than to imply it was a threesome, yeah Grace: Gross! & you know what I mean, babes Janis: yeah, it's beyond #obvs you don't wanna avoid this boy mhmm Grace: like that matters, he's not gonna hit me up & same Janis: well okay Janis: arranging that goes beyond sisterly duties into pimp territory so Janis: focus on what you're actually gonna do whilst you're there then Grace: 😭😭💀💀😭 then yeah? Grace: 👌💜 Janis: you could do that here Janis: at least go somewhere instagrammable to die Grace: well duh Grace: final livestream for the haters Janis: 🙄😏 Janis: wonder if anyone's killed themselves on stream yet Janis: must've Grace: obvs Grace: but I literally couldn't even if it was original content cos they'd all think it was about him & I'm sooo 💔💔💔 Janis: No one wants that as their legacy Grace: exactly Janis: even if the race to #1 most subscribed when he gets #cancelled would be just riveting Grace: he won't even though his fans are just Janis: sweaty virgins Janis: yeah, figures Grace: 😂 Grace: I'd tell him to hit them with a Q&A but like he's got no answers Grace: literally should've known I wasn't pregnant Janis: thank fuck you ain't Janis: this time anyway Janis: obvs the whole thing is a little more complex but Christ Janis: having to parent with that Janis: and knowing your child was the product of a really shit shag Janis: 💔 Grace: IKR Grace: at least he doesn't know he could blame the menopause for how shit it was Janis: I highly doubt he knows what the menopause is Janis: nevermind the concept of it coming early Janis: though that shouldn't be that unfamiliar Grace: who knew it could come this early though Grace: not his defence squad but like wtf Janis: I hadn't heard of it before, really Janis: like I knew people like Ro and Mia and co can stop getting their period and it might not come back, even if you sort yourself Janis: it's shit luck Grace: yeah Janis: Did you not get your period Janis: on whatever contraception you're on Grace: loads of people don't on the implant so I wasn't freaking out Janis: yeah Janis: s'what I thought Janis: you don't think, I mean that's not why, is it Grace: I'd hope someone would have floated that as a side effect before I got it put in but it's not like I can ask my former squad if they're also going through it Grace: they might've moved on by now anyways it only lasts 3 years Grace: hence my 👶 panic Janis: I don't think even doctors and scientists know what it does to our bodies Janis: we're still guineapigs for all this shit Janis: I know loads of people get fucked up from all the hormones they add to your body, and the ones they take away Janis: again, just bad luck it happened to be permanent, I guess Janis: fun times Grace: at least I won't have to do any of that shit any more Janis: that's true Janis: it's not like there aren't any perks Janis: or that the losses can't be filled with other potentials in the future, when you actually wanna think about all that shit Grace: unless I go bald then I will kms obvs Janis: If you go bald, you can just go for it and superglue a wig on Grace: find me one that doesn't make me look like a weird cartoon character & sure Janis: no 💗 or 💙 Janis: got it Grace: ty 💜 Janis: failing that, you could make Ri transplant you some of hers Janis: like so you won't give me a baby, okay Grace: 😂😂 coming at her with ✂ Grace: I love that you didn't volunteer yourself bitch Grace: 💇 or 👶 tbh Janis: Full horror movie moment that Janis: selfish to a fault me Janis: and final girl, so you can pry 'em off my cold dead head or outta my cold dead womb Grace: my 📽🎞😱 moment is that this is gonna change my skin type to dry so it'll take me at least a full week to find replacements for all my makeup faves Janis: yeah, but think about how hard your spots should disappear Janis: get yourself a decent moisturizer and you won't even need to bother barely Grace: !!! Grace: I didn't even think of that OMG Janis: mhmm 👵 don't get acne Grace: 🙏🙏 Janis: and you can try a new facial over there, yeah Grace: as long as Ava isn't like no thanks bitch Janis: won't give her an option tbh Grace: 📽🎞😱 Janis: 😏 you know I'm scary bitch Grace: oh please Janis: 👊 Grace: 😘

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: what are you up to rn Grace: UM why? Janis: 'cos we can't find Cass and can't take the kid on the decent rides, will you just stand with him for a minute Grace: oh Grace: yeah sure Janis: cheers Janis: give you some cash, he likes the easy shit Grace: OMG don't even mention it Grace: or like worry about it cos I'm not trying to break a nail rn Janis: you've gotta entertain him somehow Grace: Duh Grace: but that's not with waltzers and rollercoasters babes Janis: I've just said he can't come with Janis: we're talking coconut shy level, Grace Grace: & I'm saying I know what I'm doing Janis: well don't fuck it up please Janis: call if he gets too worked up he's shy Grace: obvs! just go Janis: it's serious Janis: and you haven't said where you are Grace: I'm being serious Grace: I'll meet you at the sweet stand Janis: 👍 Grace: 👌👌👌 Grace: [shows up with a very unimpressed lad in tow] Janis: [just such a withering look like who the fuck are you] Grace: [does not intro him and is just intro-ing herself to Bobby and it's cute] Janis: [just in the background letting Jimmy do what he need to do but lowkey trying to walk away like bye] Grace: [it's fine girl we know Grace has got this] Janis: [ahh when you can't stand to be around her for literally five seconds] Grace: [me when Trace is on one] Janis: [go have fun] Grace: is he allowed any more 🍬🍩🍭??? Grace: he says he's had NONE but I know when a boy is feeding me a line 😂 Janis: try and make him have a hot dog or some chips first Janis: if not he'll be 🤢 Grace: me too tbh Janis: such a good influence, like Grace: I'm sorry that my date is a feeder or something 😱😱😱 Grace: does not take no for an answer Janis: bodes well Grace: UGH IKR 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: he's in a mood cos I got 💋 on him earlier like ?? excuse me Grace: I don't have my own makeup line yet, boy Janis: it is grim when you've used a cup Janis: like a crime scene Grace: OMG don't be on his side! Grace: he wouldn't be complaining if it was anywhere but his face Janis: behave Janis: shits probably harder to wash off that herpes Grace: EW Janis: you said it Grace: I literally did not Janis: you did Janis: don't need to hear about you lipsing anyone Grace: Okay hun that makes no sense Grace: if it had staying power it wouldn't have transferred and he wouldn't be 😣😣😣 Grace: & I wouldn't have to go hard on 🍬🍩🍭 to show him my chill vibe or whatever Grace: so #notlikeothergirls & so annoying Janis: what's any of that got to do with me Grace: 🙄🙄 Janis: you talk for the sake of it Janis: talk to your shit date, not me Grace: sure Grace: laters, babes Janis: 👍 Grace: 👋 Janis: [later than you were probably expecting, like] Janis: k where are you Grace: bumper cars Grace: there's a line but we're basically at the front of it now 🙏🙏 Janis: cool we'll jump it Grace: you can take my place, these are NOT driving shoes Janis: babe, you just steer Grace: really!?? Janis: yes 😂 Janis: how do you not know that Grace: Oh thank god! Grace: idk I've never been on them Janis: how is that possible Janis: maybe you should go in with your lad, let Jim take Bobs Grace: Before this date I haven't been to the fair since I was younger than Bobby so Grace: Oh please, he's long gone Grace: Your boy can if he wants to though, that'd be cute Janis: sure, too many sights and smells, can't control her gag reflex when she's abused it that hard Janis: oh, soz Grace: 🙄🙄 not everything I do is with Mia, thank you Grace: & no you're not, babes Janis: pretty much since you were a bit older than him, maybe Janis: well not really but can't blame him Janis: didn't reckon on you bringing a child so Grace: do you see her rn? obvs not Grace: 🤷🤷 if he wants to say that's the reason Janis: can't really bring your missus on a date Janis: got to have some boundaries Grace: can you STOP Janis: what Janis: I said soz, make Jimmy buy you a drink or something Grace: I don't want a drink Grace: I'm gonna have to work out tomorrow Janis: well can you not just take it Janis: you don't need paying but he'll wanna do something so Grace: He knows my coffee order Grace: I'll make time to go Janis: k good Grace: He's a cute kid, I don't even need anything Janis: that just makes you sound like a child snatcher so keep that hush Grace: you're ridiculous Janis: am i Grace: Duh Janis: 👌 Grace: Whatever, I've said my goodbyes so 👋 too Janis: cheers Janis: later Grace: Any message for mum and dad? Janis: lol that's a good idea Grace: I obvs meant about where you'll be or when you'll be back Grace: but 👌👌👌 Janis: that's even stupider then, ain't it Grace: mhmm Grace: my bad, hun Janis: don't mention it Janis: not the easiest mistake to make but 🤷🤷 Grace: 🤷🤷🤷🤷 Grace: I'm so over it Grace: you too, I'm sure Janis: if they're still acting like they don't have answers to either of those questions, I can imagine Janis: could always repurpose my message for yourself Grace: if I wasn't going straight home but tragically Janis: what difference does that make Janis: can still tell them to fuck off Grace: not before dad picks me up thanks Grace: it's not like that boy will be doing a U turn now I'm Bobby free Janis: lol no way he was 17 Janis: looked 12 Janis: and he still would, he's a fucking pushover Grace: he's 19 Janis: so a nonce Janis: cool Grace: You're literally OBSESSED Grace: first I'm a child snatcher then he is Janis: that's literally the definition Janis: you're a child, he ain't, what do you want me to do Janis: didn't work anyways and even if it did, no one's throwing 😍 at it Grace: If you wanna report him, go off Janis: yeah I'll ruin some sad cunts life 'cos you're out here trying to prove something Grace: ???????!!!!!!! Grace: he asked me out, I agreed, it's not a big deal Janis: mhmm Janis: swear guv Grace: OMG SHUT UP Janis: sort it out for fuck's sake Grace: I didn't know he was that old! You literally just said yourself he doesn't look it Janis: don't incriminate yourself Janis: not illegal but just as weird if you're tryna fuck 12 year olds Grace: gross Janis: you said it Grace: No Janis: definitely did Grace: Leave me alone Janis: ooh alright Janis: touchy Grace: OMG why can't you ever stop? Janis: pot kettle Janis: why are you being so sensitive Grace: Why are you still talking to me? Janis: 'cos what's wrong with you Grace: yeah cos I'm gonna tell you Janis: why do you care Janis: you got what you wanted from him anyway Grace: What does that even mean? Grace: you have no idea what I want or wanted Janis: you wish Grace: obvs you do, but I really don't Grace: I'm wishing you'd go away thanks Janis: yeah, can't you tell how much I wanted to see you Janis: good catch up babes Grace: 😂😂😂 Janis: about right Grace: sure Grace: see you at school, like Grace: Spanish is first lesson back Janis: maybe Grace: 💔 Janis: isn't it just Grace: next time you steal a car is fine too Janis: next time it won't be nans so 🤞 no Grace: just don't look up my bad date, his wouldn't get you a mile out of Dublin Janis: got standards, darling Grace: I know, babes Grace: everybody does Grace: You can only wish for secrets Janis: can give the daily vlog a miss then Janis: phew Janis: love it when they put the work in for me Grace: mine's postponed cos I don't film little kids but there's plenty of other content THANK GOD Janis: 💔 should've thought of that before agreeing to go out with one really Janis: not very committed Janis: I'll 🙌 to that Grace: 👌👌👌 Janis: n'awh Janis: say hi to the gals from me Grace: I'd love to but there's been a disconnect Grace: I'll say it to my ex instead, he just got here Janis: less impressive than the 19 year old Janis: forgetting your audience Janis: they'll probably go for it though THANK GOD 👍 Grace: You're forgetting I only need a ride Janis: that's low, man Grace: If you wanna console him, he'll be free later Janis: you know something's gonna happen to you one day yeah Grace: I know you've got your 🤞 Janis: get a grip Grace: obvs the plan Grace: I'll make sure he's parked first tho, wouldn't wanna cause a crash Janis: unlikely Grace: not really Janis: if anyone bought you were a decent ride you wouldn't have to rely on your ex Grace: if I wasn't he wouldn't be back Janis: he's back 'cos your price is a ride Janis: you know it's not even a fiver in petrol Janis: literally the eastern euro girls on the street aren't as cheap Grace: wow Grace: so judgemental Janis: you're dirty Janis: it's disgusting, judgment from me is the least of your worries Grace: Yeah it honestly is Grace: & I'm sure you have better things to do so Janis: yeah talking to mum and dad for a start Grace: cute Grace: say hey from me Janis: you reckon I won't Janis: got no loyalty to you Janis: be more than a hey if they can manage to do even a semi-competent job Grace: I don't care if you do or whatever else you do Janis: Don't need you to Janis: be out of your hands, like Grace: sure Grace: they'll really show up for whatever slut intervention you think is about to happen Janis: you don't reckon Janis: you're delusional if you don't Grace: you are Grace: where's it been, babes? Janis: you're putting yourself in danger Grace: Me and how many of the rest of us Janis: you're stupid, Rio at least has some brains Janis: marginally more self-esteem Janis: born victim, you, trust me, they're gonna get on board Grace: nobody's more devastated than me that I'm not more like Rio, obvs Grace: except maybe dad Grace: 💔 there's not 10 of her Janis: no one cares what he wants Janis: irrelevant beyond being a sperm donor Janis: enjoy your chat 💕 Grace: 💜💜💜 Janis: 😂 Grace: it will be amusing if it happens Grace: I'll keep you a front row seat, hun Janis: don't worry Janis: buzzin' I care, so far in my DMs Janis: must be gutting when you're the only one that does and you get no recognition for it Grace: 😭😭🙄🙄 Janis: that's alright, sure your ex will take you back and console you Janis: epic shag and all around winner that he sees you as 😍 Grace: if he won't, I'll try one of the others Janis: always the shameful hookup when you've run out of lotion, never the girlfriend Grace: mhmm Janis: love that for you Janis: just get her in to help you with your prices Grace: 😂😂😂 Grace: she is good at maths Janis: is she Grace: oh of course she's never helped you with your homework Grace: my bad again, babes Janis: not what she's remembered for is it Janis: being the whore who married her cousin is really all that comes to mind but that's almost sweet Janis: pop it in the eulogy, lovely Grace: if you'll excuse me, I have to make some conversation with this boy Grace: such a good chat tho Janis: not what he's paying for Janis: so don't worry about not being a decent conversationalist Grace: tragically telling him that wouldn't get me where I wanna go so Janis: the tragic thing is you think you're too good for the bus when you're literally selling yourself Janis: wonder how many times this one told you you talk too much? 🤔 Grace: Oh please Grace: & I'm the extra one Grace: everything's a drama tonight, hun Janis: don't act as if you don't understand Janis: he would only pick you up so you blow him Janis: you aren't friends, they don't care about you or even respect you Janis: it's as simple as that Janis: and you're not even trying to get out, you're going home, half an hour away Janis: it's actually the saddest thing I've ever heard Grace: not anymore obvs Grace: why would I go home for the lecture? Janis: because you've got no balls and nowhere to go Janis: fucking hell I hope they pay for a decent shrink, seriously Grace: Thanks to you I've got nowhere to go Janis: go home Janis: sort yourself out Grace: I'll take the party he's offering but thanks again Janis: that's right Janis: get off your face then it ain't your fault Grace: It'll be my fault but I won't care Grace: you always tell me not to so congrats, finally taking that advice Janis: you'll be crying on a stranger's bathroom floor within the hour Janis: you ain't built for it, so tah for the guilt trip but i ain't biting Grace: I love that you've given me that long tbh Janis: got to earn his time and attention and petrol first Grace: Oh honey, I could do that crying Janis: wanna turn your phone off Janis: they'll be out looking now Grace: I would but if it's not on my snap it didn't happen, don't need to tell you tho Janis: your locations on Janis: they aren't that thick Grace: What do you care? You want them to find me Janis: you mean you do Janis: christ Grace: You think you know everything about me Grace: where does the delusion even come from? Janis: you think no one does Janis: let's unpack that one Grace: no-one does know everything Grace: they can't Janis: someone needs to take your netflix away too whilst they're at it Janis: fucking hell Janis: we aren't 13, even then that shit was embarrassing Janis: now it's well Janis: get yourself on the corner with your bessies level Grace: Whatever Janis: you really thought that was a revelation Janis: put it as your next caption, get those kids clicking ❤ Grace: 👌👌�� Janis: this is what comes of letting stoners breed, jesus Janis: experiment over Grace: we all wish it was Grace: at least they've stopped now Janis: no need to wish Grace: not gonna jump out of this moving car, however much you'd love that Janis: i know Janis: no balls Grace: 💔 Janis: answer your phone yeah Grace: As if Janis: for fuck's sake, Grace Grace: I don't need to hear mum chatting to me like I'm Carly or Edie Grace: or dad telling me that he still loves me Janis: well then, think that it's not about what you need, I don't care Janis: just do it Grace: I literally just said no Janis: I literally don't care Grace: So get out of my inbox Janis: answer your phone and I will Grace: I'd actually rather kms than answer that phone call in front of this boy Grace: it's not happening, go away Janis: no Janis: answer the phone Grace: no Janis: do it Janis: stop being selfish Grace: 😂😂😂 Grace: coming from you Janis: and? Grace: it's just hilarious that you think you can make me do anything Janis: 😂😂😂 Janis: answer the phone Grace: no Janis: do it Janis: he doesn't like you anyway so don't act like that's an excuse Grace: It's not about him Grace: he answered the fastest Janis: then talk to mum and dad Grace: I've nothing to say & like I said I don't wanna hear what they are going to Grace: no thanks Janis: No one cares Janis: pick up the phone and get it over with then Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: exactly Grace: I'll do it when I'm drunk obvs, there'll be no stopping me then Janis: why not now Grace: I'm busy, like Janis: no you ain't Grace: excuse you Grace: the fact this makeup has no staying power was literally the opener of this convo Janis: and what Grace: & he'd kick me out of the car if he saw me without any Grace: duh Janis: again Janis: so Janis: that's the point Grace: your point, babes Grace: mine was that I wanna be here Janis: no, yours was you need a lift Janis: which you don't now so get out Grace: no, it was that I don't wanna go home thanks Janis: no one does but you have to Grace: Why do I? Grace: I literally don't Janis: yeah you do, you aren't being safe or smart Grace: &? Grace: it's been forever since I was either Janis: exactly Janis: so go home Grace: Why now? Janis: its pretty obvious Grace: No Grace: it would've been obvs if someone had said something at my 13th birthday party when I went further than anyone during 7 mins in heaven cos Connor O'Malley said he really liked me and he wanted my birthday to be special for a good reason again Grace: or when I hooked up with his best friend like a week later cos he lied Grace: You don't care, you've never cared Grace: don't tell me what to do now Janis: yeah, your birthday Janis: and you reckon you got it bad it could've been worse if I hadn't bothered saying anything Janis: you think i'm going to pick up your slack and be 2nd to you Janis: for what Grace: OMG you're just like Mia, putting yourself in the centre of everything Grace: I've never thought that or wanted it Grace: 2nd to me!? I'm not that fucking delusional Janis: how dare I remind you its my birthday and all Janis: bullshit, Grace Grace: That wasn't the point Grace: I'm trying to tell you, it's too little, too late Janis: that's it Janis: that's your problem is it Janis: poor you Janis: get a grip, you and every other girl at school Janis: fucking hell, edie died Grace: Get a clue Grace: this is why I can't talk to you Janis: not trying to talk to you Janis: go home Janis: I'm not there Grace: Even Diego's out so like I said, why should or would I? Janis: because you wanna be Grace: You're actually not on the same planet, I s2g Janis: that heart to heart you're trying to have Janis: they're the only ones that'll listen Janis: so go Grace: They won't Janis: bollocks Janis: all they do Grace: You go Grace: do whatever it is you want Grace: I'm good Janis: no you're not Grace: obvs but as good as I can be 🍾🎊 so 👋 Janis: no Janis: I've told you Grace: Go off, I'll mute you when it gets boring Janis: no you won't Grace: ILYSM but even so Janis: you won't so save us both the hassle Grace: you'll be hassled by drunk me, babes Grace: she'll be living her best life Janis: no one believes that Janis: and you think I wasn't bored before this began Janis: difference between us is I do give a shit Grace: of course I don't think that, we OBVS know each other so well Janis: hurry up Grace: 💃💃 Janis: hilarious Janis: don't reckon I won't show up and bring them with either Janis: get your head out your arse and make it easy for yourself before I make it worse Grace: that's your fave thing tho Grace: it'd be so mean Janis: not stopped you before Janis: go on Grace: drunken portuguese is some drinks off but sure dad's waiting by the phone so Janis: can't even remember any so Janis: what do I care, you're talking to them Grace: this is so annoying now Grace: you're putting me off Janis: now Janis: you are slow Janis: come on Grace: shhhhhhhhhhhhh Janis: no Janis: [rings her all the times] Grace: 🙌💜 Janis: picked you up yet Grace: 😂😂😂 Grace: they're slow too, hello Grace: I've been saying that this entire time Janis: told them where you are or what Grace: mhmmm just gonna send them the location so they can hang Janis: do it then Grace: I 👏 AM 👏 BUSY Janis: no, you aren't Grace: Oooh this boy says he knows you Grace: very ginger, very aggressive 👋 Janis: okay Janis: that's nice Janis: off you pop Grace: he is not cute, babes Janis: what a tragedy Janis: start dialling or I'm gonna come over Grace: No you're not Grace: you never wanna be where I am Grace: & neither does your actually cute bf Janis: correct Janis: that's not what it's about so do it Grace: Just let me have a night off OMG!!!!!!!!! Grace: you get to do everything you want Janis: so Janis: you aren't me and you don't know what you want Janis: sort it out Grace: yeah okay I'll figure all that out in the AM Janis: no, you won't Janis: we're coming so you can think about it all you like once they're done Grace: STOP Janis: why should I Grace: cos I'm asking you to Grace: cos you're my sister & you don't even love me Janis: so you think you can just say and do all that fucked up shit and I'm not gonna stop you Janis: I don't think so Grace: What do you what me to say or do? Janis: I've been clear, call mum and dad and get them to come get you Grace: & after that?? Grace: Why do you want me to be all alone like?????? Janis: they're going to talk to you, work something out Grace: they're gonna talk at me and we'll all 😭😭 & nothing will be any different literally Grace: not drunk enough for that yet soooooo Janis: try listening yeah Grace: they're the MOST cringe though 😱😱😱 Janis: then you should agree Grace: 😂😂 okay bitch Janis: mhm Janis: they're waiting, like Grace: UGH Janis: yeah Janis: they've said they'll text so I'm not going Grace: What did you say? Janis: why? Grace: cos I wanna know how bad the freakout will be Grace: what did you say about me? Janis: what you said Janis: no need to lie, you gave it all up Grace: so you just told them everything Janis: all the relevant info, yeah Grace: I literally can't go home EVER Janis: yeah you can Grace: How could you do that to me!?? OMG Janis: how could I not Janis: not cosigning on that shit Grace: cos it's none of their business what I do Grace: or yours but at least you're not like OLD Janis: you're their kid, that's literally all their business is Grace: So are you! You don't let them tell you anything Janis: they're still meant to try Janis: and they do Grace: I hate this Janis: good Janis: you're not totally crazy then Grace: can't you come instead? Grace: I'd take Rio over them rn Janis: probably don't Janis: when she have her last kid, probably hormonal Janis: well I ain't got a car and we know how you feel about me stealing one but I can come Grace: IOU 💜 Grace: screenshot that in case I'm more drunk than I think I am Janis: you're always more drunk than you think you are Janis: forget about it, like Grace: me or like everyone? Grace: 🤔🤔🤔 Janis: you, specifically but yeah Janis: most in general Grace: my ex isn't if you wanna fight him Grace: cos you wanna fight most people Janis: which one Grace: this one Grace: oh you mean how many hookups ago duh Janis: i mean name, any other identifiers, even then, unlikely i'll remember Grace: Tyler Grace: he's not white that helps him stand out in my exes line up Grace: hmmm Grace: short and mad about it? Grace: that's his identifier with me but shhh Janis: 😂 Janis: oh right, can recall that one then Grace: he does NOT like you, babes Grace: too tall obvs Janis: 💔 Janis: gutted, obvs Janis: his 👀 are chest height and everything, that I remember Grace: IKR?! Grace: he was so 😣😣😣 cos I had my 👠s on Grace: boy they weren't for you! I'm SORRY Janis: probably gonna wanna steal some shoes if you're coming with me though Grace: ??? Janis: 👟 Janis: you'll be like a  baby 🦒 on ice Grace: are we walking all the way home? Janis: depends Janis: send us your location and I'll see what I can do Grace: [does] Janis: we could walk that Janis: but we can get a bus like 10 minutes from there if you need Grace: Today has been the literal WORST from the moment I agreed to the fair idc Janis: that means no complaints then yeah Grace: can I do them now cos I've been so excited to go out with him since I met him and then FINALLY it comes around & ugh Janis: seemed like a moody prick Grace: boys are such liars Grace: like okay you're nothing like you were that day in town & you're actually 19 & I don't think you even wanna be here Janis: yep Janis: girls too, in fairness Janis: you're just used to that and not trying to fuck 'em so Grace: I just thought he was different, nice or something Grace: like you said I should go out with Janis: yeah well Janis: never said it'd be easy, like Janis: few and far between Grace: I tried really hard Grace: Like REALLY Grace: it's so stupid Janis: ain't your fault he was a twat Grace: I fell for it Grace: nice lads aren't here for me, obvs, I should've known Grace: I literally do know Janis: it ain't that simple Grace: It is though Grace: I'm a bitch Grace: Is Jimmy coming? Janis: don't worry about that right now Janis: nah, he don't need to Grace: Tell him I'm sorry then Janis: bit rude i don't get one Janis: it's fine Grace: I mean for everything Grace: Mia Grace: since he got here Janis: yeah Janis: pretty mental, even for you lot Grace: I told her, I keep telling her Grace: cos I am happy for you, like Janis: alright, I'll tell him Grace: Believe me though Janis: I do Janis: don't be weird, like Grace: you have to cos I love you, okay? Grace: but idk what to do about her Janis: I can handle her Janis: he can too Janis: but she's genuinely just Janis: you know Janis: you need to handle her too, yeah Grace: I don't work with her though Grace: or without Grace: cos she's not talking to me rn & look Janis: bollocks Janis: she would've told you to go for it with that lad Janis: come on Grace: I met him because she was being a bitch about you that day he was over at our house & I made her leave Grace: I wouldn't have gone into town on my own otherwise Janis: you could've met him any time Janis: and it's not about him Janis: you've gotta admit, he's not exactly out of character in your ex line-up Janis: can't think like that Grace: she would've said no & none of this would have happened so Tyler wouldn't have picked me up & mum & dad wouldn't think I'm a sex worker Janis: I didn't tell them you were a sex worker Janis: and she only would've said no 'cos she'd wanna be watching us so that's not like she's looking out for you Janis: not like she's got a sixth sense for dickheads herself Grace: I hate her Grace: I hate my life Janis: yeah Janis: I know Janis: you've got to get rid of her at some point Grace: Why don't you love me? Janis: Grace Janis: it'd just be easier if we didn't Janis: for all of us, you especially Grace: what does that mean???? Janis: it only hurts if you love or care or Janis: whatever Grace: but its not about Edie cos you didn't love me before Grace: & you love him, your boyfriend so Grace: what did I do? Janis: that's not true Janis: I don't know Janis: maybe I can't Grace: but you literally love him Janis: no I don't Grace: It's everywhere, all over everything Grace: I can't be on my phone without seeing it Grace: or in the same room as you Janis: yeah and how many of your exes did you actually love Grace: that's not the same Grace: I don't look at them like that & they'd never look at me like it either Grace: it's so fake, it has to be if I'm in it Janis: I've not known him that long Janis: no one has, like Grace: So? Janis: can't be in love with someone you don't know, right Grace: I know when I've done the wrong thing like IMMEDIATELY Grace: maybe you can still feel something that soon when it's good too idk Grace: not the right person to ask about love Janis: noted, babe Janis: just saying, think lots of people fake it Grace: Yeah Grace: sometimes you have to & sometimes you want to Janis: do you want to? Grace: when? Grace: I fake like everything, babes, you need to hit me with specifics Janis: well that's what I mean Janis: if your ratio is mostly wanting to, then I guess that's alright Janis: but it ain't so Grace: it's like I have to pretend I'm not freaking out whenever a boy touches me but I want to pretend that's not always gonna be a thing Grace: specifics Grace: I have to be friends with Mia but I don't want to Janis: Why do you have to Grace: ??????? Janis: be friends with her Grace: like I said, it's too late Grace: I can't go back and not tell her everything or have her with me for everything Grace: idk how to do things without her anymore Grace: I need her even if I don't like her Janis: 'course you can Janis: look at us, we're blood relatives and we manage Janis: you don't want her fucking up everything you do forever Grace: I'll have her to blame that way though Grace: if it's just me, it's literally me Janis: nah Janis: family album full of people you can blame Janis: easy Janis: swear Grace: she hates you & I wanna hate you, sometimes Grace: so I thought that would be easy Janis: yeah but she also wants to live in my skin so Janis: complicates matters Grace: but like same ?? so Janis: now you see why I didn't wanna come to those sleepovers Grace: fine cos I don't want you there being prettier than me Janis: 😏 yeah right Grace: ugh Janis: you alright Grace: I just didn't wanna cry here, you know? Grace: he'll think it's about him Janis: go outside Grace: I wish screaming I DON'T LOVE YOU BYE actually meant that Grace: instead of making people think I do Janis: screaming anything don't really help your case Janis: try 🤐 Grace: actually can't though, sorry Grace: 💘 or 🤐 Janis: I've got headphones Janis: it's fine Grace: Where's Jimmy's mum? Janis: not coming to pick you up, can tell you that for certain Grace: Is she dead? Janis: Don't know Janis: did Bobby talk about her lots then Grace: He asked me if we've got one Grace: & said that he doesn't Janis: yeah, she pissed off, about the sum of it Janis: don't know if he knows that or what though so Grace: Maybe he was too little Grace: he's so sweet Janis: yeah, pretty cute Grace: like really gentle, little lads are normally so loud & annoying Janis: girls are well worse Janis: especially the ones in this family Grace: duh Grace: you can say I'm most annoying, babes 👑 treat yourself Janis: was talking about the actual children, like but you know Janis: fight a toddler if you need to, babe Grace: Oh so I'm an actual child when a 19 year old lies to me but not when I want a 👑 Grace: so rude Janis: that's life Janis: don't make the law up, soz Grace: 💔 Janis: I'll run for PM when I get a sec Grace: I love that for you Janis: obvs Janis: no 👑 Grace: but you have any food?? Janis: food? Grace: I'm so hungry like all the time 😱😱😱 aren't you? Janis: nah 'cos I eat enough and at the right times Janis: I've passed hundreds of kebabbies and shit, we'll go get something Grace: 🙏🙏🙏🙏 Janis: who's gaff even is this Grace: UM idk Grace: his cousin maybe? Grace: no his uncle Grace: no Janis: don't need the family tree, I get the vibe Janis: are there any other girls from school there like Grace: that's a real no Grace: I would not be here Janis: ugh Grace: if I'm gonna commit suicide I'll do it myself thanks Grace: don't need them or their insta stories Janis: not my main concern Grace: ?? Janis: it'd be better if it was an actual party with school people Janis: not his cousin uncle and co Grace: Why? Janis: because why would he bring you around his older male relatives Janis: what do you have in common with him, never mind them Janis: it's so dangerous, Grace Grace: I didn't know it was gonna be this sketchy Grace: that's not what he said Janis: yeah well boys lie, remember Janis: it's fine, I'm only a few streets away now, apparently Grace: I'm outside so we can just leave, yeah? Grace: it's not gonna be like a thing Janis: nah I well fancy going in there and shouting my head off and all Grace: you know what I mean Janis: if you're outside then yeah, what am I gonna do Grace: I'm sorry Janis: at least you are okay this time Janis: I meant it when I said something's gonna happen though Grace: It won't even I'm so done Janis: alright, well you all say that when you feel like shit Janis: general you that time Grace: he's deleted Janis: 👌 Grace: Like, I'll obvs get new shitty exes but no need to go back here Janis: screenshot that one, yeah? Grace: 💜 Grace: he's not that cute, I was just over all the white boys Grace: no offense Janis: variety is the spice of life Janis: though literally no idea who that ginger you're talking about is Grace: I think he thinks you slept with his gf?? Grace: I set him straight on that, literally Janis: ha gutted i did that Janis: shh Grace: No way you would've, he showed me a pic & you can do so much better, babes Grace: trust Janis: awks Janis: poor ginge Grace: he wouldn't stop shouting at me like excuse me we're not the same person Grace: as if I'm gonna turn around and you're the back of my head Janis: you probably telepathically told me to do it though Janis: know what twins are like Grace: if she was cute, sure Janis: i don't think that helps us sound any less weird Janis: glad you went with a different clapback Grace: there's worse things than homewrecking someone that ugh Grace: but 👌👌 Janis: not taking that one for the team Janis: no matter how much of a cunt he was Janis: soz Grace: fine, wouldn't wanna risk barista boy's 💘 anyway Grace: a bitch but not that bitch Janis: shut up idiot Grace: he's so highkey 😍😍😍 & I think that's nice Janis: shame he ain't coming Janis: be hilarious if you said that to his face Janis: for me anyway Grace: I've seen enough PDA thank you Janis: you were definitely told to leave so Grace: I'm still mad at you btw Grace: & you can't make me leave a coffee shop, bitch Grace: I was mid ☕ Janis: that weren't my idea Grace: idc still 😱😱😱 Janis: your mates shouldn't bitch so loudly, like Grace: 🙄🙄 I know Grace: I'm so over it Janis: seems exhausting Janis: having to give a shit about what everyone else is up to all the time Grace: mhmmmmmm Janis: and just to be bitches Janis: seriously Grace: they're just hung up on you specifically cos every boy they want has asked you out & you said no Grace: boys they can't even get Grace: like it's your fault you're prettier than them Grace: when they have nobody to blame for how petty they are trying to be Grace: it's so boring & ridiculous!!! Janis: should fuck 'em just to really make it worth their rage but Janis: do you do it too, when it ain't me Grace: Ew no don't Grace: &? I know what I am, honey Janis: unlikely, reasons I said no Janis: I mean, it's probably easy to fall into that way of being Janis: like when you left all your shit at CG Grace: Okay no Grace: not talking about that with you ever Janis: why not, I literally had to give you your stuff Janis: we all know what it was Grace: exactly so we don't have to go there Janis: alright Grace: are you here or do I have time to kms? Janis: not trying to embarrass you Janis: and yeah not far Janis: this is just the longest street ever for some reason Grace: you should stop smoking with that boy Janis: please Grace: mhmm please do Janis: we're a long way from you giving anyone lectures Janis: let alone me Grace: it's still gross & you're already way thinner than me Janis: the ulterior motive comes out Janis: don't smoke enough for that, or lung disease, tah Grace: you can get fucked up by his sexy smoke rings, babes Grace: but sure Janis: that's 2nd-hand Janis: it's worse 'cos all the co2 you breathe out Janis: smoking yourself, way safer Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: I'll take it up then Janis: you'd have to get 'em off weird john Janis: no way you ain't getting ID'd Janis: any safety is dashed tbh, wouldn't bother if I were you Grace: excuse you literally have 19 year olds falling at my feet so Grace: well almost Janis: that like underage girls but sure Janis: probably ducked when he realised how virginal you ain't Grace: Yeah Grace: 2 years too late, sorry boy Janis: ick Janis: leave it out Grace: ????? Janis: that's too young Janis: it's depressing Grace: I know, I cried for like a week Janis: stop thinking about it now Janis: and chatting Janis: drive me to drink Grace: you can share this one Janis: alright, had enough earlier Janis: one of us should be vaguely sober Grace: did you sneak it into the fair while I was babysitting? Janis: ha Janis: after, went pub Grace: Oh okay Janis: did you think i was drunk Janis: was just a sugar high, like Grace: you left ASAP and I did when you got back Grace: literally wouldn't know Janis: did think it was a bit of a jump Grace: it's so rude that I can't get in anywhere & you can Janis: I'm tall Janis: and you've got a babyface Grace: like I said, so rude Janis: blame mum and dad Janis: neither of them brought it in the height department Grace: I blame avó, she's who I look like Grace: & she has that direct 🙏🙏🙏 line to god, obvs so Grace: she could have put in a word for me not to look like this Janis: get that you ain't meant to be a braggy cunt Janis: but bit of a slap in the face to call out one of his creations and say 'not again, thanks' Grace: 😂😂 Janis: also she'd give you a slap in the face for that one so let's hope she ain't in the kebab Grace: she'd wanna hit me for lots of things I do but Jesus loves a whore Grace: & she's never ate anywhere that isn't ours either Grace: doubly saved 🙌 Janis: 😏 Janis: not suggesting she's been out on the piss tbh Janis: it's late as hell and not midnight mass vibes, like Grace: if you're going that hard of the blood of christ, maybe just marry him tbh Janis: gutted she didn't Janis: probably can't dump your kid to be a nun though Janis: unfortunate for us all Grace: maybe I'll go become one Grace: can you vlog it? Janis: considering the vow of poverty, don't think you can show up with thousands worth of filming equipment, no Grace: tragic Janis: not even to mention all the others i think you'd struggle with Grace: well it's just mean if you don't tell me now Janis: come on then, I see you Janis: tell you all about it Grace: 👋 Grace: you look so pretty OMG Janis: let's not be texting and walking rn babe Grace: 👌👌👌

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: didn't know you had mates who weren't total twats, McKenna Rio: cheers though, was alright, actually Buster: You and me both, babe Buster: Don't waste your time telling me though, I'm sure he'll love it when you add more praise to his review Rio: Let's not go crazy with the self-indulgent gold star giving yet Rio: Though I know you posh boys love that unwarranted gratification 👌🍆 Buster: You already did from what I heard Buster: And yeah, he did love it by all accounts Rio: 🙄 Like he's never been to confession Rio: Awks Buster: No need now Buster: It's well off his chest Rio: Generous of you to be that sounding board Buster: Didn't give me a choice Rio: Gotta take that up with him, not me, babe Rio: can only ask I get my reviews back firsthand, like Buster: Been there, done that, cheers Rio: can imagine how that went Rio: take it it ain't same time next week like Buster: Ask him Buster: He's bound to be up for another crack at you Rio: Will do Rio: if he's done chatting to you, like Buster: He is Buster: Made sure of that Rio: Charming as always Rio: Oh, you boys Rio: just ask him out next time, it's obvs what you really wanted Buster: Not a homewrecker either, like Buster: Obviously more of your type than mine, babe Rio: Well, you saw him first, claim that dibs, babe Rio: I said he wasn't a total twat, if that counts as a ringing endorsement, then I worry for ya, boy 😂 Rio: Soz you wanted me to have a shit time and I made best with it 🤷 Buster: Whatever Rio: Moody Rio: Take it your date isn't down for round 2 Buster: Fuck off Buster: If I'm in a mood it's 'cause of that cunt telling me all about how up for it you were Buster: Nothing to do with her Rio: Alright Rio: But there ain't nothing I can do about that Rio: not like I told him to tell you Buster: I know Buster: You've already opened your legs for him now so it's done Rio: Shut up Buster: Too late to be touchy about it Buster: I told you not to fuck him Rio: And I told you you don't tell me what to do Rio: or not do Rio: and just 'cos he's running his mouth doesn't mean you can too Buster: I can do what I like Rio: Why do you like being a dick? Buster: Why do you like being a hoe? Rio: Feels good Buster: If that was true you'd pick your lads better Rio: How would you know Rio: know you've not actually fucked him yourself Buster: I have all the details I need and didn't ask for, remember Buster: And I know he's a pussy Rio: I'm so sure he saved his post-shag cry for you Buster: Shut up Buster: You're welcome for the 'feel good' and we're even so you can go Rio: Had nothing to do with you Buster: Fate was it? Buster: Christ Rio: Oh, piss off Buster: Gladly Rio: 👋 Rio: Grab a coffee forreal, you need the pick-me-up Buster: Such an expert on what I need Rio: Doesn't take a genius Buster: Lucky for you Rio: Whatever Rio: Least I know how to have a good time Buster: Yeah? Buster: When Buster: If last night's what you're leading with I almost feel bad for you Rio: Always Rio: Believe it or not, don't actually need you to organise my social life Buster: Nah, just bail you out when it goes to shit Rio: Even if that were close to the normal Rio: we're even now Rio: so you can't be bitter about that anymore Buster: I ain't Rio: What are you then? Buster: Right now, I'm fed up Rio: Why? Buster: You'd usually reckon you know Buster: Losing your touch? Rio: Nah, but you know, you're meant to let people talk their way to the solution Rio: not hand it to 'em Rio: #psych101 baby Buster: Says you Buster: I got these cunts in my ears talking and talking, sick of it Buster: My solution is gonna be to throw their arses out in a minute like Rio: You already know you need better friends Rio: just French exit for now Buster: And where are you that's so fucking desirable? Rio: Nowhere yet Rio: Some overpriced bar Rio: it's actually criminal Buster: So take your own advice before giving it to me Rio: go where? Rio: can't be arsed getting a room so I'm staying out 'til I go back home Buster: Don't be stupid Buster: There's loads of space here Rio: You're alright Rio: Like you said, your shit friends are there Rio: I'll see where the night takes me Buster: And I also said I'm sick of them Buster: But fine Buster: Come out with me. Show me that fun you're always having apparently Rio: Alright Rio: [Sends location] Buster: I'm not bringing your boyfriend Buster: If you want him, ask him yourself Rio: Like I said, let's calm down Rio: sounds like he's having a better time bragging than repeating and idc Buster: Yeah Buster: I'll be there in like 20 Buster: Think of somewhere better Rio: Way ahead of you Rio: Seriously, better pre-drink with these prices, boy Buster: Way ahead of you Buster: Behave and I'll sort you out with something to change the mood Rio: 😇 Buster: 😈 Buster: How hard do you wanna go? Rio: I better take the hardest Rio: you need to keep it fun and light over there 😜 Buster: I haven't left yet, I can change my mind Rio: Your mind's made up and we both know it Buster: You reckon? Rio: Know so Rio: But I'm down for whatever you bring Buster: You'll be regretting saying that when it's just me Rio: You reckon? Buster: You don't? Rio: Come find out Buster: On my way Rio: [One tense cockblock later] Rio: Well, no idea you and him were so serious about each other Buster: Shut up Rio: 😂 Rio: Bless Rio: Glad someone's checking up on you Buster: Besides you, like Buster: Stalking my feed Rio: Yeah, yeah Rio: message received, like Rio: never try and take their place again 😉 Buster: Is it? Rio: You tell me if I've got my wires crossed Buster: I don't need to tell you what you already know Rio: Worth a shot Buster: I know what it'd be worth Rio: You sure? Buster: Yeah Buster: Aren't you? Rio: Hmm Rio: Pretty sure Rio: Need a bit more convincing though Buster: Where are you now? Rio: [Airport selfie] Buster: What am I meant to do with that? Rio: You don't need the suggestion Rio: just saying Rio: 'til next time, McKenna Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: I know Rio: life's a bitch Rio: but work calls Rio: gotta get my account back in the black somehow after London prices Buster: Shouldn't have been so quick to ditch after one date, like Buster: Say what you like about that boy, he spends Rio: Can always get back in touch Rio: ask for his old man's deets, get me an ACTUAL daddy Buster: [Sends a photo of the lad and his dad] Buster: That's ended me Rio: 😷 Oh no Rio: Mr. Grey he ain't Rio: rather work at the shithole still Buster: Unlucky babe Buster: Plenty more rich old pervs in the postcode though, I'm sure Rio: Like you don't know Rio: giving me the naff deets Rio: c'mon Buster: I'm out as standard if I hear any old man's ride pull up in the drive Buster: Bad enough when they try and call me daddy I don't need to meet the actual for comparison Rio: 😂 Rio: That accent, just feel like you're getting shook down for pocket money or a new pony, right? Buster: Makes me miss your ends Rio: 🍀 Rio: no denying its a pantydropper of an accent Buster: Yeah Buster: Tempts me to show my face about Rio: Should Rio: much as you LOVE being the host with the most Buster: Might Rio: Why not Rio: Always some cunts Birthday, if you're looking for an excuse Buster: I don't reckon I need one Rio: Fair Rio: Not a total tourist Buster: Too right Buster: Proved myself many a time Rio: I mean Rio: Not getting away with it that easy Buster: Am I not? Rio: Definitely not Buster: I don't believe you Rio: We'll see if you come thru Buster: Reckon I need more convincing before I make the trip Buster: Dublin ain't that special, like Rio: Lies and slander, first of all 😏 don't let the fam catch you saying that, like Buster: They don't catch me doing anything, it's all good Rio: You better 🙏 they don't Rio: Me too when I work out how to convince you Buster: If you want me on my knees, only gotta ask Rio: Don't Buster: Just saying Rio: Well I'm JUST in public rn Rio: rude as always Buster: Well nobody's forcing you on that flight Rio: Only reality Buster: Fuck that Rio: Usually, I'd agree with ya Buster: Until next time then Rio: Yeah Buster: Safe travels, Cavante Rio: Mind how you go, McKenna