#but while rose traveled so he wouldnt be lonely and through that company he learned to be humane

[felicitywilds]

also slowly turning around in my brain how rose said she was going to stay with the doctor forever, and then later donna says the same thing (to martha!! the doctor doesnt even hear or know!!! it would make him so happy but hurt him so much if he did!!!!!!), and then when she tells the doctor shes going home in sontaran stratagem he immediately assumes it means shes leaving him for good and accepts it but also launches into all the things he still wanted to show her.

and i know its played for a joke like haha silly martian thats not what i meant! but this is the same man who, when he needed to turn human, loved someone SO DEEP AND HARD that he didnt think he'd ever fall in love again. ever. even with his memory erased. so when you take that moment of "oh you're just popping home for a visit" and like ACTUALLY look at it you're like. this man gets so so so attached to people, and is so incredibly scarred by losing these people he loves that he has no choice but to let them go when they want to leave on good terms, because he knows how bad it could get for them if they stay, no matter how much he wants them to stay.

anyway donna's forever and rose's forever are just different flavors of the same "i need you as much as you need me, so im in it for the long haul, bad stuff included" and its chefs kiss

[writingsonhellswalls]

winter whispers.

This is a angsty mini-fic about my character Sarafina and @ladykakata​ ‘s character Joa! This is set some time in the future of the story we are writing. Joa is off fighting a war, Sarafina is at their home. Enjoy! Tell me what you think! This was written in a little over an hour on a school night because I was grumpy about homework. Fic below the cut! 

I did not edit this beyond a brief run through with spell check. Its 11:30 and I need the sleep. 

OH! Question for Lady Kakata: Can you guess which other character I mentioned? ^-^ 

Nestled in her bed of warm furs and blankets, was the red haired beauty and lady of the castle.  It was to be expected the woman was sleeping, but in fact she was wide awake. A winter storm had  raged against the stone building and kept her awake most of the night. It didn't help her situation that she was alone after having just recently gotten used to sleeping beside someone. Sarafina wanted to nothing more then to roll onto her side and place her cheek to her husband's chest but it was impossible. Instead of warming her bed and perhaps the rest of her, he was off fighting in a war. It almost caused her physically ache for him, but those were sad thoughts she did her best to keep away.

A sound of annoyance escaped her as she rose form her bed, tossing the covers off only to regret her choice instantly. She hadn't yet full accepted that despite her room being the best in the castle, it wasn't always as warm as her bed. Her annoyance grew further as she attempted to pull on every layer of clothing she had. Heavy furred boots were the last addition to her outfit. She wore a simple dress, a bodice made loose simply because she put it on herself. The dress itself was made in the fancy of most northern clothing, heavy and warm. Lastly a pretty emerald colored cloak, lined with soft brown fur from summer rabbits, the only gift she didn't complain about, it was both pretty and functional.

She paused only for a moment to fix the braid she slept in, tucking away all stray hairs before departing. Hykross castle was alive with the bustle of life. Servants and guards travelled  about, tending to the castle after the storm. She hoped no one would notice her presence and she could slip by unnoticed, but being the Lady of the Castle prevented that.

"Your grace," A young woman said in passing, curtsying slightly. Sarafina offered her a small smile and bow of her head. She had come along ways since meeting and falling in love with her husband, the fact she was called 'your grace' was still new to her. Part of her wanted to ask them not to bother with it, but it was an old tradition that would take far longer to break then she'd be alive. Having exchanged formalities, Sarafina found her way down from her room and outside without too much trouble. She had stopped to ask the head servant about their stores, if the storm got worse. They exchanged brief words about what to be expected, Sarafina asked him to send out a few guards to check on the village just a short ten-minute ride from the castle. Despite having never governed over anything beyond her sheep, Sarafina had taken to the task of helping the villagers with great care.

Upon leaving the castle doors she quickly made her way to the stables. The apprentice stable hand greeted her with a small smile, she asked him to saddle up her mare so she could go for a short ride. The man showed some concern but had grown used to her request. It was almost twice daily that Sarafina took her ride and he learned long ago not to bother asking where she went. The young woman always said she went to the ridge, knowing full well that the castle was hidden within a mountain range. There were a variety of ridges that could be ridden to in less than an hour.

It took him only half of an hour to saddle her large, mountain bred mare. Sarafina didn't bother to wait inside the castle, but stayed near the stables until she brought out. Sarafina didn't bother to wait for help on climbing onto her horse, instead she pulled herself up and set off. A single guard followed right after her for her protection and not because she wanted him to.

Pulling the hood of her cloak up, Sarafina attempted to shield her face from the bite of the cold air, but little could be done. The wind was unforgiving, turning her cheeks red and biting harshly. She didn't seem to mind.

The path to the 'her ridge' was well mapped out in her head and the ground itself. No amount of snow could fully hide the beaten path, her mare even seemed to know the way well. The guard behind her kept a safe distance, preferring not to upset Sarafina if he rode too close. It wasn't that she disliked his company, it was that the ridge had become her place. A spot within her husband's land that she claimed for herself. Somewhere she could go when she wanted to get away for a little while.

Arrival at the ridge had her dismounting quickly. There was a lone tree that grew without any help beyond it's own roots. Symbolic in a way, Sarafina had found the tree suitable to climb and so she did. Hand over hand and slowly at first, Sarafina climbed up just until she was able to nestle herself and have a vintage point to the valley below. Her cloak remained some shelter from the wind, the tree providing the rest. It was purely for her own selfish reasons why she wanted visited the ridge everyday. She wanted nothing more than to be the first person to see her husband return home, this ridge provided that view.

Having grown used to the way the mountains seemed to carry their own time, Sarafina knew she could stay in her spot until the eastern light touched a particular set of trees. Her eyes went back and forth from those trees to the valley out in front of her as her mind wandered.

It normally went first to the war itself. Why it was being fought and how her husband had decided to risk his life and take what was rightfully the North's. Usually at first thought of her husband, Sarafina's senses would feel with the memory of him. His fierce icy gaze, sent those faint of heart running away. His eyes however, often warmed her, she assumed it was because he loved her. Continuing to picture his image in her head, next were his lips.  Her own lips ached with the loss of his, she wondered how much longer she would have to go without the taste of him. Even her ears seemed to miss the sound of his voice, the way he whispered her name when it was just the two of them. A jolt of something undefinable ran through her at the mere  thought of his whispers. Clearing her head of such thoughts, she felt the slightest fading blush fall away from her cheeks. The cold air helped with it.

Content with watching the valley below, Sarafina did her best to push away all the sad thoughts, but a few crept their dark claws into mind. Fear prickled against her skin as she feared that her loving husband would never return. She didn't consider herself a religious woman, but having found love in a man who didn't want to break her spirit had given her some faith. With that new faith she prayed to who ever listened of his safe return. She wouldn't fall to her knees in prayer, but did so in the safety of her tree. The first weeks away from him she prayed of his quick return. As the weeks turned into months, her prayers also changed. Instead of being quick returned, she prayed for him to be safe and unharmed. When news travelled back, it spread like wildfire of the harshness of the war. Men dying in the fields, some suffering in medical tents. Her prayers changed for him to come home alive. She knew in her heart that it didn't matter if he came home scarred or beaten, she simply wanted him alive. Her love for him would overcome anything physical.

The dark thoughts continued to grow until felt the first of many tears begin to fall. Sarafina had learned to cry silently as to not alert the guard that often followed her out to the ridge. Instead she let them slip down her cheeks and fall from her chin. While she wanted to maintain the image of being a strong woman, it was almost impossible to hold back the tears. Her beloved husband could be dead and half buried in some forsaken field and she wouldnt know for weeks, she hated how slow news travelled. Everyday she fought the urge to take off and go find him. At least if she was near the battles she'd be able to go to him, see that he was okay. However, deep down she knew if she has somehow found her way to him she'd likely protest and try to hold him back from joining the fight. Adding to that would be the fear of watching him die. Sarafina knew she'd just get in the way of the healers who would do their best to save him. Despite how much she missed him, Sarafina knew her place was in Hykross.

When she married him she knew that it wasn't just to him, but to his title as well. She was now the Duchess of Hykross, a woman who would need to lead in her husband's absence. At first she was terrified of such a task, turning to the few advisors that stayed behind for all the guidance they could provided. There were plenty of times in the early weeks of him being gone that she felt unsuitable for the job. While she never questioned their relationship or the love between them, she did question why he would let her lead. His advisors were far better suited for the job, however like before they were old traditions not easily broken.

With time the tears dried enough for her to wipe them away. The ache in her chest had lessened only a little but it was still a relief. Carefully finding her way down the tree, she adjusted her cloak before remounting her mare. The horse had dozed off but quickly woke at the sound of her rider.

Turning her mare with the reins, Sarafina rode past the guard who bowed slightly as she rode past him.

"I think I'll go to the village later today, I want to check on the food stores there, make sure they have a enough in case we have a bigger storm," Sarafina told him.

"That sounds like a good idea, your grace, I'll ask a few more guards to join us. We can set out after breakfast," The man spoke as Sarafina nodded in approval to suggestion before urging her mare into a light trot. She gave one parting glance to the tree as the wind seemed to pick up again. Taking this as a sign, Sarafina whispered a soft prayer asking the wind to send a message to whatever gods listened to bring her husband home alive. She would be okay with a little more waiting.