#c: nico 003

[dhruvxmehta]

for: @nicocastillo location: after the funeral

It seemed unfair that the world moved along when he could not do so. Dawn signalled for a new day and forced the darkness of night to not linger around any longer, for past to stay in the review as it took the day forward. Yet, Dhruv felt stuck, clinging to memories that could only now be in the past. To move forward was impossible but everything started with a shift. Paws turned back into feet, fur to skin, and as he got ready, donning a black suit, the pain of needing to face a reality was far greater than the turn back into his human form.

He sat rigid and somewhat motionless through the service. His eyes dry in the sea of tears despite feeling the pain of the loss, despite feeling the ache of all the things never to come, jaw locked in all the emotion, he couldn't cry even if had wanted to, even when he knew he should. There was so much love in the room and his own poured into the mix. Why was the measure of love loss? It wasn't fair.

The Hensley's, especially her parents hugged him once the saw him. Kitty often joked that he was their first grandson, and they really did make him feel like he was part of the family too. And he returned their hugs will equal amount of affection. As they parted ways to speak to other guests, Dhruv made his way out, stopping only when he caught sight of Nico. "Hey," he signalled to him, "Quick word? Won't take long."

[kenxmatsui]

“Would you like me to go easy on you since you’ve rediscovered the rules?” An eye roll never could be helped and now wasn’t an exception since he had double the reason to do so. “I didn’t study property law, even then, why would Monopoly be a requirement?” Confusion became apparent as his features twisted with perplexity, slow to understand that hats and cars and dogs were tokens, Ken still didn’t fully grasp onto the concept Nico was explaining, “The choice of tokens is a tell or how one plays the game itself? By we, I assume you and the pack? Why would you all need to fight over the dog when… well you get the drift.” When his turn came, Ken dropped his red one next to Nico’s hoping to block lateral movement, “What are the other tokens?”

·✥·

"Or diagonal? Why didn't you say so, I would've played a completely different game," he said, feigning a shocked expression. Whether Ken thought he was serious or not, he would stick to the bit nonetheless. He narrowed his eyes. "You've never played Monopoly? They don't make you play in lawyer school? I figured that would be a requirement. It tells you a lot about a person. We always fought over who got to be the dog, but I'd take the token no one wanted, avoid the scuffle completely. You strike me as a car guy. Or maybe the hat. Something fancy." He stuck a random yellow token into the board, without looking where it landed. "Your go." Was it carelessness, or confidence? He would never tell.

[hvrtbroken]

work has felt relatively the same despite it all ( and by all he means : the nights at star's , the hours spent between her legs , the marks and kisses and touches swapped between them ) . they both know that when it's WORK , it's work . they're sensible and adults about it , even when it's incredibly hard because STAR looks like STAR and nico's eyes have always followed her , but now they follow her in the most intense , almost perverse way . he finds his eyes scanning for her and immediately tracing her up and down . sometimes, he'll linger on the curve of her ass , or how her breasts sit in a shirt . and he'll try not to imagine tearing it off her or exactly how her smooth skin looks underneath it . SHE'S SO ADDICTIVE TO HIM .

now , nico stifles a small yawn as he stands by the corner of the gala ball . he has no idea what this is for , but that seems to be an ongoing thing with a lot of star's events and appointments . the only main difference with tonight's one is that even nico had to dress slightly nicer than usual so he'd BLEND IN . despite it being dark inside and out , he has his sunglasses on to avoid anybody accidentally wanting to talk to him . he's here for star , and only star . speaking of which , he can see her with the same guy for over twenty minutes now . usually she flits in and out or moves quickly from person to person . nico hadn't been bothered when the guy had walked over to her , because it's not his job to judge men for KNOWING how beautiful star is and trying to shoot their shot . but he's been awfully close to her for A WHILE NOW . nico taps his fingers along his thigh where he stands , eyebrows furrowed , eyes unblinking behind his sunglasses . patience . calmness . de-escalate . uninvolve yourself . these are the pillars of his job . but for once , he feels a tick . an itch . AN IRRITATION ( not with her , of course , but with this clueless fucking dude ) .

nico pushes off the wall and easily zips between the hordes of people . immediately , his hand falls to the back of star . he's careful with the placement , but does allow his hand to briefly touch close to the lower arch of her back . ALMOST , ALMOST . he lifts his hand again because he shouldn't touch her right now . not here . not like this . not during work . " excuse me . " he says instead , cutting over whatever the random guy was saying . " star's needed . " he doesn't even bother saying where or who by . he hasn't thought that far ahead . mainly he hopes it's enough for this guy to FUCK OFF ALREADY or at least not STAND SO CLOSELY TO HER .

[briebarlow]

The last few days had been far more chaotic than Brie preferred. Truthfully, it wasn't in an entirely literal sense -- More emotional, than anything. From the moment Gabe shoved her into the back of a taxi cab, her head was spinning. With the fight at Inferno, sleeping with her ex, and having to consult her plastic surgeon about an unexpected broken nose -- Brie was overwhelmed, to put it lightly. The latter had been a good enough distraction to keep her thoughts from lingering on Gabe, and meeting up with Nico proved to be a good way to get her anger over the entire situation out. Had it not been for him and his short fuse -- The fight at Inferno would never have broken out (well, probably not to the magnitude it reached) and she wouldn't be having to deal with a broken nose.

"Shut the fuck up," Brie greets him with an eye roll, though her words don't have much bite. Everything going had left her too exhausted to pick a fight with Nico. Immediately, at least. Reluctantly, she pulls off her sunglasses, arms crossing defensively. She has no interest in being seen with bruises under her eyes and a bandage over her nose -- The blonde doesn't care how dramatic her cousin thinks it is, or if it's 'not as bad as it seems'. "I was invited to a Halloween party, of course I was there. I didn't think you would be starting an involuntary fight club in the middle of it." Brie points out, chin jutted out defensively. The way she sees it, Nico is to blame for this all. (It's easier to decide that, rather than accept that it's only a matter of time before the Outfit and MC truly go to war with one another) "This is on you."

@briebarlow

Nico had given up on the maneuver in the car once the police had arrived on the scene that night and headed to find Shay. He'd had blood streaked down his face and all, he headed into the crowd, pushing and shoving the members of the Outfit toward the police presence who've yet to get shit completely under control-- the MC and the Outfit equally relentless.

Now, it's days later and he's yet to see anyone really calm down from that fateful night. Hell, he'd made it a point to keep them riled up considering the bullshit the Outfit was spewing. Not to mention all his people that were hurt during the fighting. He didn't give a shit about the gash in his forehead but with Shay getting arrested and his cousin getting her shit rocked, he wasn't happy. Blonde hair catches his eye first but it's hidden beneath a hat and oversized glasses on her face. "You're really milking this for all it's worth, huh? You shouldn't have even been out there, B, and there you were being a little gnat."

[dhruvxmehta]

With the explanation came that sinking feeling again, bringing with it a bubble of frustration and anger aimed at the man before him and in some part Elif too. It wasn't blame per say, Dhruv realised enough to know these two didn't have a direct hand in Damien building a pack or attacking, but they were the reason he came to town. Thoughts were not shared nor was eye contact maintained as Nico spoke, leaving it unsaid seemed the best move lest his thoughts spill out and given where they were Dhruv didn't want to cause trouble for the family.

An involuntary scoff did rise. "I just fucking lost Kitty, bruv, still haven't pulled myself out from being tortured or found a way to cope with my cousin dying, you think I have everything in hand? Fuck off." Something fell away within him, a quiet snap that verbalised in an unexpected sharp tone. Dampening it with a slow exhale to push everything down, Dhruv continued with a faint shake of his head, "I know shit's not been easy for you either and not just with this fight and loss but ...bloody hell you say stalled as if it's meant to be a great service when reality is you just wanted time for you and everyone else to feel better about yourselves." As if he was meant to say thank you and convey his gratitude. He scoffed again at that thought. "You won't be controlling, you're a good person." But good people didn't always make good leaders. "But asking or wanting people to stay isn't controlling. Don't worry," he added quickly, "I'm not expecting you to ask me that or anything really." His mind had been made up for a while now, the slivers of hesitation that threaded through was due to JC but it still did not change his decision.

"I know you said this pack isn't always about 'family' or 'bond' and I should look to it as an aide," he said thinking to their previous conversation, "And I tried. Took yours and JC's help on things, bundled down at the wayward house thinking that maybe being around others wolves might do the trick and I learn a thing or two but it didn't help." Other factors were considered too, especially control when it came to lone wolves, which would need a lot more effort than usually to maintain focus but he get there. "I think I'll always feel like an outsider," he said slumping into himself. "Don't think it's going to benefit you or anyone if I stick around." He shrugged a little, "I'll figure things out on my own like always."

·✥·

Nico sighed, internally. He didn't particularly like to explain other people's business for them, but in a way, it had also been a part of his own life. "Yeah. He's been trailing her since before I met her. She came to town over a decade ago running from him, and tried to steal weapons from the Alpha to protect herself. When that blew up, I left with her." His expression darkened. "We stayed ahead of him, for the most part. Until now. I told her to try and stay. To fight." The words were bitter, the blame unspoken.

He didn't bother to hide the roll of his eyes. "Yeah, alright." This posturing and ego was pointless, he wasn't sure how Dhruv expected from him to react to it. A pat on the back, for his self-reliance? It wasn't like he was going to hold it over the guy, he would've helped anyone, and was finding it hard to give much more energy to the conversation. The thanks scraped over his skin, causing him to bristle, but he just stayed silent with his back against the wall of the house, focused on the planks of fence opposite.

When Dhruv finally got to the point, or nearly did, Nico just looked at him, gaze hard. "And I was only in Saskia's pack because I was supposed to be. Then, I left. There's other ways to live. If you want out, then go. I stalled you to make sure you had what you needed to manage on your own, and you've got that well in hand now. I don't want anyone in my pack who doesn't want to be in it. I've seen enough controlling alphas in my life, and I won't be one of them."

He paused. "I won't tell you what to do. You could stick with it, maybe figure out if it's your turn to do for someone else what Kitty did for you. Be the reason someone stays, someone who could truly benefit from it." He met Dhruv's eyes without expectation. It wasn't that far from what held him here, the motivation to keep wearing this ill-fitting suit. There were people who could use what he offered, even if Dhruv wasn't one of them. "Or," he continued, "if the Pack's not what you want, full stop, then leave and find what you do want, for yourself. Simple as that."

[dhruvxmehta]

Dhruv let his thoughts ruminate for a moment before he decided to speak on them. He had been around, in a way, but perhaps not the way that was expected or required — certainly not in his human form either which likely might be to what Nico was hinting at…yet all that was swept aside in two words. Stalking Elif. Posture straightened as eyes widened, "Wait, what? Elif?" The rest of the list soon registered as well causing an unpleasant feeling to spark within him. Anger was not common but Dhruv could hardly help the way his teeth grit now. The feeling of community, while present, scaled low for him overshadowed by Kitty and now Elif, "At least you got to kill him."

Arms folded cross his chest as gaze shifted away from Nico, "I would've gotten myself out eventually," he tried to say with a stubbornness that didn't quite reach the mark. There was no denying however that he did not want to leave Kitty, wouldn't have if he wasn't made to, but to get her out of that was needed. "Thank you... for uh not leaving Kitty like that. I - I had a feeling you wouldn't but ..." he tapered off with a shrug.

Confidence had been high when Dhruv had initiated this conversation, not that it diminished, but hesitation skirted the edges of his thoughts, did he want to do this still? Answer was yes, of course, but knowing what he knew now... A firm voice in his mind said no, there needn't be second guesses with this. "I don't have anyone to keep me in the pack anymore. Kitty was..." he paused at the past tense with a heavy exhale, "Kitty was the only person keeping me in the pack."

·✥·

Nico only shrugged. "Haven't seen you around." He didn't make any claim other than that. The awareness of the pack bond had been enough for him to know that if Dhruv got in real trouble out there, he'd sense it. But they weren't friends, they weren't really anything to each other except through obligation. And the shadow of concern he showed Nico seemed very much at odds with their previous interactions.

"How am I getting along..." He really wished for a smoke, right then, but leaned his head back against the stucco wall of the house and considered before answering as truthfully as he could. "Everything Damien did—stalking Elif, changing whoever he felt like, trying to take the Pack to serve his own ego. Attacking our friends, our community. Murdering my first recruit because she got in his way." The rage in his voice was quiet and even, but he met the other wolf's eyes. "And I only got to kill him once."

He didn't like to think about the empty weight in his arms, and the bodies of wolves laying on the ground. Resentment simmered in his blood. "I got you out of there because someone had to. The other pack might've doubled back to pick up their dead, and I didn't want to leave her there like that."

For a beat, he simply studied Dhruv's face, and let resignation wash over him. A minute, maybe two—that's how long it took before his concern went back to himself, to his own well-being. Nico responded with one tired word, inviting him to get to the point. "Sure."

[dhruvxmehta]

He wanted this to be quick and painless as possible, the last thing the family needed was to be disturbed in their time of mourning, and Dhruv did not want to be the one to cause it. Nodding in acknowledgement, they stepped out but Dhruv took a moment longer before responding. Despite the way he had wandered away from the pack was and w, at from townsfolk and into the woods, thoughts drifted back to people constantly. His family, the Hensley's by extension, the pack, the injured, even the Alpha that stood before him but at the centre of his grief was Kitty. "Why wouldn't I make it? They're essentially family to me."

He looked to Nico, taking him in as if for the first time, which in a way, it was, since that night. Concern crept along corners, not fully making itself known just yet but not fully being absent from his tone either, "How are you getting along? Thank you for getting me out that night." His voice was a little quieter than he had wanted but the question was genuine. Scenes of the fight resurfaced again, they'd never really go away, he knew that but he shook him aside anyway for the time being. This needed to happen without distractions. "Right. Do you remember the conversation we had near the end of last year? You telling me to think it through and asking for time to figure things out? Is this enough time? Have you sorted everything?"

·✥·

Nico stayed in his head for most of the memorial, using Jasmine as an anchor to hold himself steady. It was easier when he could find things to occupy his time—getting more chairs, plates for a table full of food. His own role was clear to him, making space for others to mourn and supporting the Hensleys in what ever small ways he could. But their daughter had died trying to help him, trying to protect him. It was supposed to be the other way around. Whatever he could do, it would never be enough.

He'd noticed Dhruv, if only because it was the first time he'd seen him since that night. Nico hadn't expected him to lean on the Pack, but he'd maybe held out a sliver of hope that Dhruv would at least try to be there for the others too, for Kitty's sake if nothing else. But he'd simply become a ghost in his grief, like Elif.

It was something of a surprise, then, to be called into conversation with him. Nico nodded, though, and said, "Uh, sure. Outside?" and indicated the side door. As they stepped out of the house, Nico tucked his hands into his pockets. "Glad you made it. I think it meant a lot to them to see you here." He gave his chin a jerk towards the house, indicating the family. "What did you want to talk about?"

[kenxmatsui]

"A trick to Connect Four?" He held back a laugh, "This isn't Rocket Science, Nico." Prizes were being handed to winners of games, but really, in this moment Ken felt he deserved one for not calling him Balto. "Sure, I'm feeling generous, I can share the secrets -- you have to line up four counters up, across or diagonal. Mind-blowing, isn't it?" As Nico spoke on he other game, Ken simply shrugged, "I've never played Monopoly and I don't plan to so that fact is lost on me. Your move."

·✥·

Ken's usual smug attitude didn't rub him the wrong way, at the moment, which Nico counted tentatively as improvement between them. "I'm sure. I'm not giving up. There's a trick to it, isn't there?" He said, suspiciously. "Something people know if they've had the training, and everyone else has to figure it out or lose forever, like how in Monopoly you can also win by becoming the Railroad Alpha."

[kenxmatsui]

His presence here was not so he could play yet he found himself at a table with a game anyway. An utterly simple one that made him wonder how anyone could ever possibly lose– but there Nico sat, proving just that. Verging on smug when his counters lined in a neat, winning diagonal, Ken bit back a grin, "You're a statistical wonder. Sure you want another round? I would say I'll go easy, but this game is already so easy."

closed starter for pace (reply with whoever you want!) where: boardgame night @ the daily drip

·✥·

Staring blankly over the rim of his coffee mug at the table before him, Nico shook his head. His losing streak was growing more impressive with each round, but it had woken his competitive side as well. "Hey, hey now, there's no way—something's gotta give. One more game, come on."

[hvrtbroken]

they've both talked about this enough that they're both VERY aware of their safe word . nico reminds it , breathing it onto star's skin , every chance he can get . before they start anything or he even thinks about touching her , he asks her to say it , to hear it from her tongue . to hear her say the word so they both know they're ok . it was a non-negotiable . a safety . the one thing nico spoke about first ( and initiated first , once he realised how intense their sex could get ) . he always pauses , slightly , when ' stop ' falls from her lips . a part of him slows , unsure , but they both trust each other enough to know what the word really means and how to use it . how to use their ACTUAL word which would make nico back off in a heartbeat , smother her in kisses and affection . so although he temporarily hesitates , he doesn't stop in his fingers pressing against her own smaller ones . nico's breath hitches , climbs higher and higher , along with his heart rate as star basically sobs against the feeling of him finally touching her . HE'S SPENT TOO LONG NOT TOUCHING HER . he aches to make up for it .

a hot , breathless sound tumbles from his mouth as she uses sir to address him . the first time she said it , nico almost laughed , but his cheeks coloured . he liked it . liked the way SHE specifically said it . liked the way it formed on her lips , bounced from her mouth . there's not much of anything that star could do that nico WOULDN'T wholly love . nico's eyes move past her face , watching the way her entire body is tense , hiccuping against the sheets as she stumbles on word after word . prayer after prayer . BEG AFTER BEG .

when she orgasms , nico feels it all over him . physically . his fingers remain deeply tucked inside of her , aiding in coaxing her orgasm out of her - yet it comes so suddenly that a startled noise leaves him . his eyes widen as she orgasms in a way that he hasn't seen before . her release splashes against him , hot and silky against his skin , then against her sheets , across her bedroom , striking and intense . nico's breathing is ragged as he finds her eyes again , mouth slightly ajar . her screams as she came ring in his ear , bouncing against the walls of his closet . she looks wrecked . utterly spent . star looks the sexiest he's ever seen in his life , which is saying something because she is commonly the sexiest and most beautiful woman he's ever seen. he's only vaguely aware that his cock is painfully hard now , practically vibrating over what it saw , how he made star become so undone . HE DIDN'T THINK HE COULD GET HER LIKE THIS . nico gently removes his fingers from where they're crooked deep inside of her and slides closer to her , ignoring her release draped over both of them and instead kissing her neck , then peppering up and up - closer to her mouth . " you're okay . " nico whispers into her skin , his own breath harsh despite having down far less than she's done . " you okay ? " this time it's stated more as a question , as he draws back . his non-sticky hand grazes over to push back some of her hair that's come undone . " remember our safeword ? "

star always takes on everything . a strong part of him is scared sometimes that she'll just always aim to please him and never actually use the word . HE NEVER EVER WANTS THAT . instead , wants to provide the opportunity for her to be safe and comfortable , even as his own cock is aching , desperate to be buried deeply inside of her and fucking her with a ferociousness he barely allows himself to . nico smoothes back some of her hair , which sticks to her sweaty skin . " we can stop . " because that's all that matters . SHE'S ALL THAT MATTERS . " i'm all yours , beautiful girl . "

there's something there to nico's smile, growing wide and even brighter when she complies, that makes it so easy for her to follow his orders. how her obedience, her eagerness, can pull something so dazzling to his face, something that should belong on his features yet he rarely shares. nothing compares to it. it's almost as comforting as his words when star fingers herself, determined and gone, all the same, coming undone and yet not close to done. at least according to him. because he's licking praises into her waiting mouth, and she chases after his lips belatedly, half gone already. whimpers because she can feel him hard against her thigh. "nico, nico-" his name falls past her lips like a song, like a tether to something solid. the sound of his name turns into a moan that starts deep in her chest — because byeol feels nico's fingers push two of her digits away to replace them for his. 'i didn't stay stop yet.' and suddenly the waning stimulation kickstarts with a sputter, her thighs shaking.

"i- i can't-" she cries, feels the ache in her arm, present yet blurry compared to the overstimulated pleasure of their fingers together. inside her together. two of hers, two of his, stretching her wider than before, filling her up impossibly. something finally more akin to his cock. "nico, please-" it's too much. too much, and yet she doesn't stop. doesn't want to. her free hand grasps at his arm, nails digging into the firm muscle of him, uses the motion of the frantic thrusts of her hips to help her along, even if they pull away every few seconds. "stop- stop. i can't." but she doesn't push away. doesn't stop her own ministrations. keeps going despite herself. despite her broken words and crackling voice, despite the tears returning, blurring the beautiful picture of her boyfriend above her. star doesn't stop. because he hasn't told her to yet. she can barely move her hand anymore, but it doesn't matter. his fingers, the motion of them, help push them in with his, helping her press into that tender, swollen part of her. in comparison, nico's fingers reach further in, presses deeper into her. byeol can hear herself, the vulgar wet sounds of her own pussy, the loud, unending string of moans. she's being pushed to the brink, and yet still asking, weeping for more. waiting patiently for his cock.

her head's gone. somewhere far beyond the sheets she's on, somewhere only her and nico exist. distantly, the word comes to mind. vermouth. an inkling of it that gnaws at her; coming from the aching of her arm, the overstimulation at her core. she's feeling so much. too much. so much pleasure that it errs on painful, biting into the edges of it that it rings high and dry in her ears. but it's nothing in comparison to the profuse delight she feels being good for him. listening to every command, doing whatever he says. "sir- sir, it's too much." the title comes out naturally, revealing itself finally. it's something buried deep, that raw bit in her chest helping unearth it into the daze of her head, pushing the title out — bleeding a new, almost reverence into how she defers to him and his every word. ( a filthy indication to how much she looks to him, how much she trusts him. ) "nico, sir-"

star's orgasm comes without warning this time. fast, dirty, frazzled, feral. a broken sound rips out of her throat, accompanied by a hot spray of her cum, pooling crudely between their two hands. her own hand goes limp between them, letting him help her ride out this pleasure, unable to do much else anymore while it hits her. it's an obscene sight, probably. her squirting all over them both, cum gushing out to soak the sheets under them, to the insides of her thighs, onto nico and his underwear too. her eyes are half rolled back, half closed, body shaking beneath him, fingernails scratching at the hard planes of his stomach . . . and yet, after all that, after the pushing and pulling and coming apart, star would still take more of nico. wants more- no, needs more, in fact. aches for his cock, even if she can barely fight through the blur. doesn't feel complete without it, like he's built a dependence in her on it.

( he's ruined her, and she revels in the wreckage. )

[hvrtbroken]

he hears the stutter in her tone , isn't surprised by the way she goes red and seems almost like she wants to refuse . his eyes watch her carefully , scanning her features , her bright eyes , flushed cheeks , dainty nose and hair that's slightly mussed up but not nearly enough ( not yet ) . her fingers pause in their movements and nico gently brushes his nose against her , silently telling her to keep going . HE DIDN'T TELL HER TO STOP . he likes watching her do this for him . he wants to learn every single way she does it . he doesn't think he'd ever get tired of seeing her messy , filled with his cum and coming undone . NEVER . finally , when she says the words , it's with an bashfull-ness that makes nico's smile turn slightly bigger , even brighter . " good job , baby . " he murmurs the words out , as dear and solid and real as ever . there's something within him that pulsates at the unsureness within star . everytime she looks at him , flustered , eyelashes fanned out , mouth ajar . . . it makes him feel like he might go crazy . it makes him want to cover her mouth with his and lift her off her feet . she's seen so much yet not that much at all . when it comes to sex , he likes seeing what she knows , what she doesn't . how eagerly she'll try anything . how she'll have her own ideas and thoughts . NICO WANTS EVERY PART OF HER SO BADLY , he isn't sure where she begins and he ends anymore . he's always liked sex , but he's never felt this insatiable and desperate and hungry before . " you're incredible . " he repeats , before leaning back again . his hand falls from her knee to apply some pressure on his hardening cock . he can feel himself stirring up for her again , half-mast and wanting more . she always makes him get like this . he feels like he's in his 20s all over again , with impossibly high stamina and a determination to keep going .

when nico looks at her dainty fingers disappearing inside of her , squelching and wet , he wonders how the hell she manages him . his fingers are at least double the size of hers . he doesn't want to brag , but his cock is definitely bigger . and she takes it all . yet here she is , fingers and knuckles inside of herself and she's whimpering as if she's never taken more . THIS INNOCENCE . the unwavering trust . he drinks it down . " you use only two ? " he repeats , other hand on her thigh , thumb gently rubbing circles on her , every temptation within him trying not to knock her fingers away so he can go to work on her . " but you'd let me . . . " his mind shutters off , goes blissfully blank . four . or all of them . nico's breath exhales within him in a giant whoosh , uncontrolled , filling the room outside of his whimpers and ministrations . when he reopens his eyes , he knows his gaze is hungry , devouring her spread open wide for him , legs kicked out , cum dripping out of her , looking so filthy and beautiful all at once . " — so you've never tried three fingers on yourself before ? " it seems INCORRECT , but he loves that star saved this for him . let him get her this way . let HIM do things to her that she wouldn't even do to herself . and she does . . . she sinks in another finger , squirming , whimpering , but the fourth finger slides in and nico's teeth wear into his bottom lip , watching carefully as she does . the four fingers look snug . her opening looks filled , and he can't understand it . can't understand HER , although he wants to . " you're close , huh ? i can tell . i can see it . " he whispers it out , soothing and encouraged , wanting nothing more then for his own fingers to take place , to fill the gap she's left , to touch what's left untouched . he presses a few more kisses on her knees , using his head to keep her legs apart , as her hips jut up . " you're so good at following instructions , baby . " nico's voice is warm , impressed . his hand glides closer . closer . the temptation is too much . his eyes lift to hers , just as his thumb glides over her clit . not enough to add any pressure , but to provide the sensation , the fuzz , the VIBRATION and static of his thumb touching her . he moves it quickly , trying to keep himself as restrained as he can because this is her time and he's trying so hard to not be greedy with it .

his cock aches now , fully hard and expectant . hungry to fill her again , cum inside her again . he feels himself tremble as she rolls her eyes back , his thumb resuming encouraging circles on the inside of her thigh , pretending it's where he really wants his fingers to be . his other hand tightens on her knee , and he reminds himself to loosen up , not scar or bruise her with his grip . " star . . . " words leave him , breathless , as he watches the orgasm take over her entirely . her body pulsates . she seems to almost not be herself at all as she fucks herself onto her fingers , twisting , groaning , messy , voice strained as she shakes , back arching off the bed . HOLY FUCK . his eyes are wide , drinking her in , hands twitching to touch her , but instead continuing to graze her legs , gently hold her through the orgasm as it pulsates through her . her words are nonsensical . he doesn't care . as her body shakes with the aftershocks of it , nico climbs up the bed immediately and finds her mouth . he seals it over with his own , breathing hot and heavy , cock brushing up against her as he does . " you looked so fucking good . " he licks it into her mouth , his hand finally going between her legs and gently knocks two of her fingers out . they feel slippery and hot , trembling , but nico can't think straight . instead, he plunges two of his own fingers deep inside of her , right alongside her other two fingers . " i didn't stay stop yet . " he whispers, guttural and strained . his hips press against her body , cock taut and harder than before , desperate for friction . " help me get you to the second one , baby . "

star shivers when nico kisses the tender inside of her knee. once untouched, now a place that's been brushed against in an intimacy that would have made her cry if she wasn't fingering herself stupid right now. he seems to do this a lot, touch her in places she never thought to ask, placing intense emotions she'd never imagined she'd been able to experience. it intensifies when he keeps going along her skin, words egging her on more and more. but then he's asking her to say it back to him — that she's incredible — and even her fingers pause for a long second. she can call herself filthy things for him any day, does it willingly now, the action making her clench and writhe every time. but the prospect of calling herself a good thing, a genuine praise has her stunted. her eyes widen as she feels her cheeks flush from embarrassment, the words dancing on the tip of her tongue but unable to form properly. incredible. was she really? she never thought of herself that way, at least in any serious manner. "i'm–" she's almost tempted to refuse, to say she can't. the word is too hard, too heavy. carries implications beyond this little world they've built on her bed. but then star is reminded of the terseness from before. the firmness he showed her, what he's capable of, pulling away and only touching her if he's pleased. it terrifies her, alas, and she's always been terribly terribly obedient for him. "i'm incredible," she says, tone soft and unsure, but still loud enough for him to hear.

nico's smiling now, a full one, one that reaches his eyes; and it's a sight to behold. it's something anyone could recognize if they saw him instead of his usual small ones. but no one else is privy to this side of him and she's sick with satisfaction from the fact. her's, only her's. "two. two fingers," star answers, breathy and stunted. ( her index and middle finger usually being the one to help herself find release, though they don't ever compare to his now. ) nico's next question catches her off guard immediately, suddenly turning right around back on it. the truth is that she'd take any and all of him that he'd give her, would happily be stretched wide for him. as long as it's him. so after swallowing hard, she continues. "four . . . or- or all of them." she feels like she's losing her breath now, arm beginning to ache, her three fingers pushing and tucking into herself, brushing and pushing into that fleshy bit near her opening.

'and i'm all yours.' the comfort that statement brings her is indescribable. there's something to it, him reaffirming it, calling her 'my girl'. the ownership of it, the unstated devotion. how much it fills her with that overwhelming emotion again, pulling her away into some place as beautiful as it is scary. byeol pushes her hips up as he hoists her for him to see, to show him clearly what he's making her do. what she's eager to accomplish for him. she's his own private show. she adds the other finger in as per instruction, doing her best to focus on his words despite the way the added stretch is making her whimper. but star doesn't slow down. the way nico is watching her spurs something deep in her, makes her even wetter somehow. "okay," she replies to his instruction, unable to say anything else because she's stretching herself wide now, four digits in. fingers herself dutifully under his keen watch, dark bleary eyes glued to him, hips jerking and tight. hears the wet squelch of herself that's so comically loud, that she feels like it isn't even her making those noises right now. it feels like she's watching some exaggerated porn video, the volume turned up high. but no, it's all her. her fingers and soaked pussy, fucking into herself hard and fast, chasing the high that she can feel just past the corner.

"ni- nico. fuck. yes, i– i'mso– s'close." her words slur together, eyes shiny with tears, looking at him desperately. she'd been iron-hot when she continued at his instruction just now, kick-started by nico's furious fucking in the elevator earlier. star can't even recognize her own voice either right now; moans and keens ebbing and flowing, coming deep from her chest one moment and then going high and tight from the top of her scalp. "cum– cumming–" her eyes roll back, free hand grabbing her own wrist to help with the ache that builds in her forearm, helping herself twist in and out of herself furiously. and while it's nothing compared to his cock — the hot, solid velvet of it, the way it reaches parts of herself she struggles to feel for right now — she's hurtling straight down into release, pushed into the sweet spot at the thought that nico would be taking over the moment she does. "nico!" star comes, and she doesn't know where anything starts and stops anymore. the one thing she can comprehend is nico's touch, keeping her grounded to their bed. keeping her here, barely sane and yet still devastatingly ready for him.

[hvrtbroken]

NICO IS PRETTY DAMN SURE HE'S IN LOVE . but he knows better than to say in right now , in the heat of the moment , when it can seem so meaningless and fraught . none of what star makes him feel is either of those things . she makes him better . she brightens his day . she's one of his favourite people he's ever known . it's indescribable how he feels around her . IT'S ALL SO NEW . he thought he'd liked women before , had been with plenty of them , but they never made him feel so hungry and insatiable yet desperately satisfied all at once . he keeps his eyes on her , imploring , as he sweetly kisses her knees again , the inside parts , the delicate skin . he's never kissed this part of her before and it feels wrong . he wants to lie her down and make sure he kisses every single part . he doesn't want to miss a single bit of her . a smile graces his features as she breathes out , voice tight and melodic . like your cock better . " you look so good with me inside you . " nico agrees quietly . he was rough in the elevator , and now all he wants is the exact opposite . lavish her in praise , in love , in gratitude . " i don't even have words for you , star . " he murmurs , lips still pressing against her knee , eyes sweeping up to meet hers , before glancing back at where she has her legs so eagerly spread , fingers pumping in and out of her . " you're incredible . you know that ? " he presses a few more kisses , brushes them higher up , to the inside of her thigh where it meets her knee . " say it for me . " HE NEEDS HER TO KNOW . knows she'll get all blushed and embarrassed . she'll say the filthiest words for him without batting her eyes , but nico knows she deserves to say the good stuff - THE RIGHT STUFF - aloud too .

" you don't know ? " nico hums out , inquisitively , repeating back her own half - answer . his smile tugs up , reaching the corners of his eyes , making them wrinkle as he kisses her again and again , allows his tongue to swirl against her skin . HE CAN SMELL HER . smell the mix of them , hear the perfect noise of her fingers inside of her . " how many fingers do you usually use on yourself ? " he whispers out . THE ROOM FEELS SORDID . it feels heavenly . it feels like a palace of their own design . " how many fingers would you let me put inside you , baby ? hm ? " THEY BOTH KNOW THE ANSWER , but nico likes to hear her say it . he opens his mouth this time as he kisses slightly higher on her thigh , nose brushing against her skin , teeth grazing . " try one more for me ? can you do that , beautiful girl ? gently now . . ." the pace in which she moves her own fingers is sweet and practiced . he grovels in it . his eyes looks at her pink wetness , soaking in , raw and swollen . SO BEAUTIFUL . he hates that he doesn't know more words . he should learn the entire dictionary for her , really . " you're mine . " he agrees , eyes grazing closed for a second , but all he can still see , hear and smell is her fingers moving , twisting , pressing . " and i'm all yours . " there's no denying it . no hiding from the truth . it's been that way since day one .

" keep going . i wanna see how you do it to yourself . " nico's eyes reopen , dark and heavy lidded before his gaze meets hers , steady again . his fingers trickle and trace down her legs . they move to her ass , so he can hoist her up , hold her like this , cover her in the palms of his hands . " i wanna know exactly how you like to please yourself . so i can do it to you , too . the way you deserve . my girl . " the last two words breathe out of him in time with his heartbeat . my girl . a whisper . a beg . a plead . his cock stirs again , and he can feel a pulse run through him with almost violence . he wants to wrap his mouth around her . he wants to taste her , drink her , devour her . he wants to move his fingers inside of her . wants to fuck her until she's saying she can't cum anymore . HE WANTS TO PLEASE HER SO BAD . WANTS TO KEEP HER HAPPY AND FUCKED AND SATED . " then you tell me when you want me to take over , okay ? like a good girl . you make yourself cum once , then let me take a turn on you next , yeah ? " his teeth gently press against her skin again , sucking over the spot immediately , so as not to hurt her . he sees the irony in that he's never much of a speaker , unless it's them two together and they're in bed and she's WRECKED ( basically : all the time , if he's doing it right ) . nico presses an open mouthed kiss up her thigh , a little further , nose almost brushing where her hand is . " pretty . " he tells her , before moving to her other leg , repeating the movement . " sexy . " he exhales , nose nudges again , this time as an encouragement for her to go faster . to keep going . YES YES YES . my girl .

when his thumb presses into her tongue, star lets out a satisfied sound. takes it gratefully, basking in his familiar taste. she wishes her mouth could be full of him right now — of him heavy and hot, but she'll settle for his finger. presses herself into it and sucks, her lips wrapping around the base of the digit, eyes bleary yet bright looking up at him. she'd never had an oral fixation before, but the longer they were together, she found herself craving the tang of him constantly. it's like her body wanted him always, like he'd made her dependent on his touch. worst of all? she welcomed it. nico pushes deeper, feels him err almost far enough and it makes her clench. then he pulls away, and she complains with a whimper, but stops herself. instead, she keeps her mouth agape, like an invitation. it's difficult to complain too, especially when every simple movement of hers pulls sounds from him that make her breath go shallow. lights her heat brighter for him, makes her head fill with static. he speaks more here, when he's like this, than anywhere else in their life. so she's eager to keep him pleased if it means more of his voice.

she's whining, shifts her hips because he's pushing his cum against her swollen lips. every touch and prod has her twitching, shaking. sensitive and yet greedy for more, clenched solid yet moving pliant against his touch. he calls her good girl and she feels like she's bursting at the seams. makes finger herself deeper, faster. feels that deep prick in her gut that radiates heat and want and reignites where he'd left off before. nico's kissing her knee and her hips jerk. the chasteness makes her feel insane, makes her want to ask for more, to beg for a solidness that feels like too much. has her moaning in whines and pleas. "but i like your cock better," she admits freely, though her voice is shaky and soft. pushes herself to say more for him, just because she knows it makes him feel good, knows he likes it. knows it'll get her where she wants to be.

the sound of her fingers, the squelch of them, how impossibly willing her cunt has become, just makes it worse. "i don't-" breathes out small and desperate. "i don't know." and it's a genuine response. she hasn't done more than three fingers in herself — could maybe even count on her hands how many times she's used three fingers on herself. knows she could probably fit in more at this point, would do it if he asked. but she can't even catch up with her own breath anymore, feels everything around her press down her form in a pressure that's pleasantly suffocating. nothing feels as good as nico's eyes though, and his gaze sears into her like hot iron. byeol can feel his cum, her want, drip down her ass and it's almost not enough either. because he's talking about doing things to her and jesus she can't feel anything else anymore. "do it. do it to me." she's pleading, voice thick and syrupy, "i'm yours." yours to command. yours to use. yours. yours. yours. because there's really nothing else she wants right now, can comprehend right now. nico's taken over her, pulled her deeper in someplace only they know, somewhere he has her exposed and raw and willing. her fingers are relentless though, doesn't slow down because he hasn't told her to. "need you-"

[hvrtbroken]

his eyebrows stay curved together , like caterpillars meeting halfway across his forehead . he feels a relief tug within him at her statement that HE HELPS HER FEEL LIKE HERSELF . all he's ever wanted , this entire time , is for star to feel safe and happy . the latter part especially started paving its way within him the last few months . he always just wanted to be good at his job , make sure he can protect people who can't protect themselves or need the extra help . he never thought about people who've ALREADY been hurt . nico can't help but think of his little sister . if anyone treated carmela the way that star's ex had treated her , he'd probably end up in jail . him and his brother have done everything in their power to make sure she understands what to do when a guy is terrible, how to recognise the signs , when to get out . IT'S A SHITTY THING TO HAVE TO TEACH ANYONE , let alone someone you love .

the engine of the car gently hums beneath them . he's glad for the additional noise to keep it from being TOO QUIET between them as they try to navigate through this new water . star's words are filled with starts and stops . she fumbles , and he realises this is probably her first time , too . she only had her EX before , and he was far from exemplary ( not that nico is much to write home about , but he knows he's better than THAT guy ) . nico reaches across the centre console and gently swipes back a few strands of her hair . " okay. " he says , because that's his favourite word , and with her he really means it . OKAY . WE'RE OKAY . YOU'RE OKAY . IT'S ALL OKAY . nico shakes his head just once . " no more apologies . " nico's lips quirk up though , in faint amusement. she's so good at them . he's glad this time it isn't just her default but something that makes sense to him : they had a misunderstanding . she's not apologising just for the sake of it . nico silently welcomes the change .

as she takes his hand in hers, nico feels like his entire body is water , flowing straight to her . he wants to fall right into her , crash to her body , hold her close to him . the way she takes his hand and presses it to her face , kisses his knuckles . somebody have mercy on him. he's just a man at the end of the day . " i know . " nico says , because he does . because to him , it's obvious . he never questions it or feels unsure . he knows star well enough to know that she only acts one way around him , and that's his assurance that they are something real . " i like you a lot too . " it sounds so pedestrian . so juvenile . the actual word he wants to say is too big , though . too soon . he rests his head against the car headrest , eyes staring at her , drinking her in . " i gotta take you home . " but the words sound reluctant even to his own ears . his hand on her face moves gently , slowly , thumb swiping just below her eye . " no matter what you tell me . . we'll always be okay . okay ? "

"no! not . . . not necessarily." sure, sex felt good and she loved it when it was with him. but more than that, being with nico felt right. felt like a decision that was her's, that she understood fully. maybe that was what she was trying to combat. rectifying her past mistakes — the mistakes of a scared, unsure girl — and replacing them with the firm, real decisions she made now. she just . . . maybe went about it the wrong way. should have thought about it more deeply instead of jumping into it without any other consideration. instead of doing something she regrets. she tries her best to simplify the complicated feelings into a sentence. "i wanted you because i want you. because i know i want you. because you make me feel like me. sex or not." doesn't know if it makes any sense, but doesn't backtrack. because it's true. the type of truth that's buried deep in her chest, that she hasn't even untangled for herself yet.

star waits patiently, doesn't prod. never does. she'll wait for him for as long as possible if she needs to. it's worth it. she's a little shocked when he pulls over, not expecting it, but doesn't complain. if anything, maybe, the quiet of the car makes her feel still. it's just the two of them. no one else. she feels her chest heave with emotion when he says the words, that he wants her. will always want her. has to breathe in slowly to stop herself from letting it get away from her too fast. "thank you," she whispers, feeling the weight on her melt slowly. listens to him continue, even if it stings a bit. because he's right. knows it, but needs it to be said, for her to confront it. nico has never been her ex, and this history she has needs to stop dictating who she is. even down to her asking for what she can give when maybe, she doesn't need to sometimes.

"i . . . i understand. i never want you to think i'm taking advantage of you. and i know you said to stop apologizing, but i feel like i have to say sorry for that." she nods this time, small yet firm. the apology is much more solid than the ones before. "i think i'll be okay. i'm working on it." has been saying this for years, but for once, she truly believes it. ( thinks about that therapist moon goes to, will ask him for help. ) she hesitates, wants to ask him if she can, but stops herself. she isn't going to let this stop her more than it already has. so carefully, searching for any sign as she reaches, byeol takes the hand he had on his face. takes it in both of her's, pulls it in closer toward her. feels right, finally holding him in a way. lifts then presses his knuckles to her cheek. wants to kiss his fingers, but settles for this for now, to have him close. physically and emotionally. to feel the gap between them closing again slowly. "i like you, nico. a lot. more than i can explain. i get scared about how intense it feels sometimes. but i know it's real. and i hope you always know that."

[hvrtbroken]

he nods along as she breathes , takes in a few deep gulps himself so he can practice what he preaches . nico feels equal parts terrified and so painfully aroused that he doesn't know what to do with himself . his eyes fall onto every inch of her , memorising it to his brain , capturing it , swallowing it . when she agrees to use the safeword when it's needed , he exhales once more . his eyes watch her in fascination , just as she opens her mouth , tongue sticking out all pink and pretty . nico allows it . allows his thumb to slowly glide in closer to the warmth of her mouth . " you look so pretty when your mouth's full of me . " he mumbles out , voice haggard and low . his cock twitches , finally , in his briefs . although he isn't sure when he'll get hard again . . . when star does this sorta stuff , it makes it VERY easy to get his attention all riled up again . his thumbs sinks into her mouth , pressing against her tongue , gliding over it . his breaths deepen , watching as her cheeks move around it , feels the tongue and saliva coat it . he pushes in further , almost to the back of her throat but not quite , before he retracts his finger altogether . nico's brain is spinning on an axis and threatening to fall off altogether .

when star pushes off her panties , nico's eyes wander to them for a brief moment . there's so many different , delicious layers of star , and every layer gets him feeling heated and insatiable . there's her dressed down , comfy and in glasses . her in the morning , or at night , crosswords and furrowed brow . there's her looking up at him , smiling , saying a soft ' hi ' . her in nice dresses and eyes that say ' get me out of here , nico ' . her in lingerie , that makes him groan and sink to his knees . then there's her like this : messy and pushing herself more than he would even think to . he's reminded again of his own words ' you'll do anything i say ' . and she does . she does that and more . nico lets out a gutted , wretched noise as she opens her legs up like a flower in bloom . there she is . still looking pink and swollen from their rendezvous in the elevator , but then she hitches a breath and he sees white heat flow out of her . " holy fuck . " he lets out , choked , as she whispers words that have no right being so sweet , innocent and filthy all at once . nico can't help himself - he reaches forward , fingers catching his own cum dripping out of her , and gently swirls it against her slit . the mixture of her wetness with his cum is almost too much . " look at you . " nico whispers again , awe and prayer and angelic all at once . he smears up and down her before releasing his hand yet again , although now it tremors uncontrollably . he wants to sink so much inside of her .

NICO SQUEEZES HIS EYES CLOSED AGAIN . he can't physically look , but at the same time he can't look away . his cock twitches again , almost with a violence , a deep desire , a hunger that he's pretty sure he's never felt for any other woman in his life . he had no idea it could feel like this . the static , air , space between them is so full that he feels claustrophobic with it . he swallows a breath and can only taste and smell her want . I'M YOUR SLUT . of course she says it . of fucking course . nico reopens his eyes and wonders if he even has pupils left as he stares at her . everything within him is pounding . nico can't hear anything but can hear everything . IT'S ALL SO MUCH . the way the words sound from her mouth make him feel like he's an erotic dance . a dream he doesn't deserve . his mouth is so dry that his tongue runs out and over his lips . his entire body trembles again on the bed , enough to feel it shake against her , despite them not touching . nico opens his mouth to ask her to say it again , but he doesn't need to . she knows him . knows him better than he even knows himself . " good girl . " the words come out of him easily , like second nature , just as she slides in fingers . they look so pretty like this . no girl has any right looking this pretty when she's fingering his cum out of her with two fingers . HER EYES ARE SEWN TO HIS . nico's hand falls to her knee , gently stroking over the skin there , imagining its his own fingers touching her bare heat . his cock aches with want , and by some miracle he knows he's half hard and lazy . he wants to fuck her again . wants to watch her fuck herself . everything , everything , it's never ending . she consumes him . nico leans forward and presses a pert kiss to her knee , eyes never leaving as she pushes in a third finger . a groan escapes his mouth , long and winded , needy and desperate . she's leaking all over her bedsheets , staining them with both of their releases . " yeah ? feels good ? " he whispers , kissing her other knee , lips chaste . his eyes bury into her wetness , watching her soak and slick . the noises are lewd and inappropriate . his mouth waters with it . " you gonna make yourself cum like this ? " nico exhales , trying not to beg himself , trying not to push her own fingers aside so he can bury his own . " . . how many fingers can you fit ? " he asks , while watching her third one , snugly pressed in . nico's eyes finally flick up to hers . " you have no idea what i wanna do to you , star . fucking hell . "

the way his hand smooths along her stomach leaves star twitching. it takes her a moment, a long second for her to compute his word. but it goes through her like a command. helps her breathe, just as asked. makes her take long, concentrated breaths. it does help, stops the room from spinning, but somehow just makes her even more aware of the way her cunt is throbbing with pain. how she's clenching around nothing. at the very least, it lets her appreciate the way he's slowly undressing, more of his skin exposed for her to appreciate, eyes searching over the scars and tattoos that peek under his clothes. it's even enough to settle into the gravity of his words, to nod solidly at his request, at the mention of their safeword. "yes," she whispers as a reply, "anytime." when he pulls slightly at her bottom lip, she opens up for him willingly — her tongue following suit, tastes the salt of his thumb, like she's offering her mouth to him.

it's so strange. she wants so desperately for nico to make decisions for her, to push her and tell her what to do. it's so unlike her every day that it catches her off guard every time. no matter how long they've been doing this, how long they've been together now. feels her brain deflate in the exhaustion of having to find the words to tell him what she wants. so much so that when he tells her, gives her instructions, she's relieved. star takes off her stained briefs in one swift motion, leaves herself completely bare for him again. follows his words without pushback, opens her knees wide for him to see her still swollen and full of his cum. he'd been weeping out of her all this while, but when his eyes land on pussy again, she clenches automatically, pushes — enough that some of his cum gushes out of her. "cum in me again, nico," she whimpers, pushes her hips up slightly, "want you to fill me."

nico's words leave her breathless. makes her chest constrict with electricity and warmth so overwhelming that she stills for a long moment. her fingers fist at her sheets to try and find some solidity in the moment, because he's asking her to finger herself — three fingers — and her throat dries again. "o- okay." she swallows thickly, lifts her hand up from her side, then slides her fingers along her slick lips. has to stop herself from gasping because she's flushed hot, the pads of her fingers almost burn. nico's telling her what to do again and the words slip out of her almost automatically. "i'm your slut," byeol sighs, rubbing around her clit, but not touching it, not yet. carefully, she slips two fingers inside, displacing most of what's left of him as she pumps her digits in and out slowly. she's already so pliant, so ready. he could fuck into her again right now if he wanted to, she realizes this as she scissors herself wider. but she doesn't say much else. keeps her movements to what he's asked.

"i'm nico's good little slut," she breathes, copies him almost word for word. her eyes are stuck on him, searching for his gaze as her third finger joins in. the extra stretch makes her moan softly, but she keeps her movements steady and slow. waits for his next instruction, pushes her hips higher so nico can get a clearer view of her. "it- it feels good."

[hvrtbroken]

SHE'S A MESS . maybe even more so than she was in the elevator and a part of him wonders if it's because he's let her free , let her roam , let her decide and she has no idea what to do with it . HE UNDERSTANDS . . . he thinks he does . . that maybe she does better when he tells her what to do and how to do it . his brain ticks along , breath leaving him in short gasps , tongue swirling over her nipple again , patient and waiting for her , her , her . her to tell him . her to say anything . ANYTHING AND HE'LL DO IT . the way she gasps free from the dress , as if having been imprisoned by it . it makes nico's head spin . the room feels like it's collapsing in on him . he smooths hands over her stomach . " breathe . " he orders , because she's so MESSY and GASPY that he's scared she might hurt herself . his hands gently push on her stomach , as if to remind her to take air in all the way there . your body . you . it's like she's repeating exactly what he desires from HER and she has no idea . he could stare at her for centuries and still find something new to gasp over .

as star's hands move to his pants , his hands almost go to stop her , to try and make sense of this and her . but it doesn't matter . NICO SWALLOWS HARD , adam's apple bobbing in his throat as he does . he watches the small of her pale hands move over the black of his trousers and he exhales long and hard , dizziness hitting him yet again . she's so fucking unreal . so beautiful . his hands join hers , kicking off the item and leaning over her in just the undershirt and briefs . his hands move up to her face , thumbing over her bottom lip , pulling at it lightly , just as she talks more . finally . finally . his heart dips entirely . nico feels the corners of her gaze darken and settle . OH . " like before ? " he repeats , voice soft but deep . nico's eyes close for a second , a sensation running through him . she liked it . she really liked it . fucking hell . so much so that she wants more ? " if it's too much you say vermouth . i mean it . any time . " he whispers out , desperate , almost begging her to do it so he KNOWS there's a line . he's so scared of crossing it . of ruining her , when he feels so ENTIRELY for her . star begs him to fuck her and everything within him wants nothing more than that . to plunge right into her and fuck her with her legs over his shoulders , driving in long and hard , making her see double vision . but he can't get hard again yet . GOD HE WISHES HE COULD . " okay . " nico whispers out , as if gasping for air . he nods once . " i can do that . "

nico leans back on his haunches , eyes devouring her skin , every inch of her , watching her writhing body on the sheets . his eyes move from her breasts to between her legs . his hands reach over to her knees . " beautiful . " he says , easily , meaningfully . " open these up for me , baby . " nico swallows thickly , heart thrumming in his ears , blood pounding , body aching . heat flows through him , overtaking him yet again . nico gently nudges her knees apart . " let me see what you look like full of me . " his hands trembles lightly , then falls from her . there's so much he wants to do . he doesn't even know where to begin . his other hand scratches at the stubble on his face , leaning back more to take her in and what he can see . " you want it so badly , don't you ? " his voice is softer this time . less callous and demanding , but with just as much intention and meaning . his eyes flick up to her and hold her gaze for a moment . " put three fingers inside yourself , baby . i know you can . " nico's never asked that of her before , never even done it himself because he's WORRIED to . only ever starts with one , slowly and inviting , then two , then can't be patient for much longer before he's sinking his cock inside her . but he can't do that right now . and she's already wet , soaked and warmed up from the elevator . he wants to see her lithe fingers move . wants to see how she does it . " you're my good little slut , aren't you ? " nico dips his head closer , mouth pressing to the insides of her knees , breath fanning out . " say it for me , baby . "

she's still not used to this, having nico with her unconditionally. helping her, keeping her together where she feels like she's spilling out at the seams — unwavering where she struggles to keep straight. it helps as much as it doesn't, makes her exponentially worse where she's throbbing and rushes her thoughts with that same massive feeling at the base of her sternum she can't hope to sift through right now. so, star just lets it devour her, feels her body murmur with heat as he helps her pull off the rest of her dress and kiss down her arm. whimpers a pathetic sound when he tells her he knows, to tell him what to do. struggles because it's hard to find words when everything is too much and yet she wants more.

star isn't sure why but she's shaking, feels the sensation reverberate throughout her. it's not new, but she still can't fully come to grips with it. it's as pleasurable as it is scary, but that's just how it's been since nico has had her. he's unearthed parts of her she'd never thought possible, things dormant she avoided for as long as she can remember. "yes. take it off, please." the words are whispered, dark eyes running over him, shaky fingers reaching down. wants to feel his skin press against her, warm and slick with sweat. needs to feel them connected where she was exposed just for him just now. "want you- your body." her fingers feel heavy and clumsy, but she manages to undo the button and zip of his pants. she wants to start pushing it down, but stops in her tracks when he calls her art. has her widening her eyes and leaves her mouth agape. it always stops her in her tracks when he does this, tells her things so beautiful and warm. ( can't even argue because she knows he means it. )

the only thing that strips her away from the feeling is his tongue on her nipple. she twitches, arches into him, wants him to mouth at her more. byeol's breath hitches, her hand reaches up to thread into his hair, scratches at his scalp to think. has to pull together her scattered brain to find words again. "keep going," she finally says, "like before- fuck me." admittedly, wants him to keep pushing a little more, get her higher. maybe just closer this time, with him holding her warm and loving. at least, she knows she's getting better at this, telling him what she wants. "make me cum." the fingers in his hair tugs, just slightly, barely enough to give. "i want you to help me stain the sheets." her voice grows breathier with each word, and she has to lick her lips because her mouth dries just thinking of it. of him pushing her enough that she's gushing for him. "just . . . praise me, this time?"

[hvrtbroken]

nico's eyes stay upturned , drinking her in , basking in the way the moonlight shines on her skin in a way that he's never seen happen to anyone before . he thinks god must have favourites . star has to be one of them . him , maybe , by coincidence , because there's no other explanation for the way she glows and shimmers . like something more than human . something ethereal . as she turns and swirls in the sheets , nico reaches over delicately , helping to unzip her . he'll never get tired of this . she always tries to do everything herself first . you don't have to do it by yourself anymore he wants to whisper i'm here . that's what i'm here for . his hands were made for her . to carve against her , to ease her out of clothes , into clothes , hold bags and doors open for her . star looks so desperate and wanton . nico's fingers graze over the material of the dress , watching it slip away like water and leaving her revealed all over again .

she looks erotic like this . her nipples and skin , body pressed against bed sheets , mouth open and wanting . nico has to swallow thickly , carefully move his eyes back up to her . his knees ache against the floor but he doesn't move yet . couldn't even if he wanted to . nico nods , hands moving to her hips , to help her kick off the last remnants of the dress . " slow . careful . " he whispers , feeling it twist in the air between them , sharp like a blade , a kitchen knife . it's a complete contrast to what they did in the elevator . his heart thuds its way into his throat . nico nods at her beg , doesn't even really understand WHAT she wants , is scared of overwhelming her . he leans up and kisses down her arm . " i know . " nico murmurs against her skin . " tell me . let me do it . " his fingertips skim over the sides of her , almost reaching her breast but then sliding back down , breath shuddering out of him .

STAR IS SO GOOD AT BEGGING . so good at pleading . she almost does it with a naturalness that could make him jealous and wonder who got her like this before . it's so different to who she is in her day-to-day . that star would blanch at seeing this mess in her bedsheets , and that's why nico swallows it up whole . he finally moves up off his knees and slides into bed next to her . his hands carefully go to his dress shirt , unbuttoning it . " is that what you want ? " nico asks softly , because he isn't entirely sure . . . needs more direction , needs instruction from HER now almost , so he can do it right for her . he slides off his shirt , but is too impatient to do anything with the undershirt or trousers . nico glides down her , breath fanning across her breasts , eye level with her tight nipples . he bites down on his lip , a quiet noise leaving him of appreciation . " you're art . " nico is meant to think it to himself , but it slips out of his mouth and between their bodies . he flushes in the darkness , but tries not to feel too embarrassed by how CRINGE it sounds , how deeply personal . his tongue slides out , gently dances along her nipple finally , tasting her . " whatever you want . yeah ? " his hands move to her back , bringing her in closer to drink . his eyes flash up to meet her . " just tell me and i'll do it . "

there's a breath of a laugh there when she gasps the moment nico picks her up. instantly feels better and worse at the same time like this, his body flush to hers — providing comfort and arousal — putting her back together and pulling her apart over and over again. star's too far gone to even attempt to push it away. instead, she embraces it, burrows her head into the side of his neck, breathing in his musk like its oxygen. ( at this point, it might as well be. ) star even uses it to egg herself on, to think back to what just happened. the utter obedience he'd taken from her, the way his eyes ravaged, how he so easily made her do things. the wanton greed that worked to only make her needier, to beg, to call herself humiliating words that make her clech around nothing now. she liked it so much, she squirmed in his arms. she liked it so much it made her almost worried.

star can't even find the capacity to think about other parties around them ( like her night guard, who's probably heard more than he ever bargained for ). her world right now revolves around nico. around her boyfriend. her lover. the man she- well, likes, feels too small for this. for the pervasive, tender feeling in her gut, nothing like she'd ever experienced before. but she can't parse through it right now, so it's pending a proper sober think. the thought slips away for now as he lays her down, but all her eyes search for are his. feels her smile return as she looks at him next to her on the floor, feels that colossal feeling churn up for a second when he kisses her palm. overwhelming in an entirely new way. like his lips planted a new seed of life into her. if she believed in god, she would've been thanking him right now for leading her to nico.

the answer to his question is laughably easy. "you." she'd answer with an 'obviously' if she weren't so needy, if her body isn't already begging for him all over again. she sits up, starts to push at his jacket by the shoulders, wants to see him bare finally. "i need you. need your skin." when she can't get the jacket past the top part of his shoulder, she huffs in frustration and shifts her focus on herself. arches to get the zipper on her back, wanting to peel the fabric off her skin. takes some fanfare, but manages to pull the zip down and allows her to push the bodice down enough that the silk bunches at her waist. the air against her pert nipples provide some relief, but it's nowhere near enough as she tries to shimmy the dress down her hips. "nico, please-" byeol calls for him, but it's more like a whine — she's asking for his help, asking him to be with her, asking him to touch her again. asking everything with just his name and yet nothing at all. pushes herself forward enough that her lips find his, clumsy and nearly missing the mark. "need you."