#chime.sys

[floofsnoot]

P won't shut her yap. I get this astrology shit enough from the body's fucking ma. Hush you.

[floofsnoot]

Me when dad loses the remote so now I can't watch anything without blasting my own ears off. His ass is trying to do something rn too so I can't be like. Hey. I need help looking for this shit. Because he'll get mad at me for trying to sabotage him.

[floofsnoot]

Also I'm not your fucking dad. Throw yourself out the window. Please.

[floofsnoot]

Scritching my partner's head to keep him calm. Because I love him.

[floofsnoot]

My kit is such a little cutie. He built us a nest earlier today and I've wanted nothing more than to spoon him in it. Love him immensely.

[floofsnoot]

Buppy cries. And buppy gnashes his teeth together. And buppy hates remembering. And he thinks he's nothing more than an animal. That he's not supposed to be treated like people because people got everything figured out. And buppy hates it. Buppy hurting. Buppy don't understand how to fix it.

[floofsnoot]

I'm literally such a fuck up dude. Imagine. Already having a backup plan and knowing well it's gonna fail because she's a fucking lesbian seeking out something that just isn't fucking us. And the second backup plan probably doesn't even fucking care because damn. I'm literally filling in a gap left behind by a certain one that loved and hurt me in equilibrium with plan C. Like. I'm greedy enough as is carrying 5 on my back. No more.

[floofsnoot]

I literally have the best poker face. Deadass and real.

[floofsnoot]

I want someone who will fight. Who won't just sit there and give pity and I'm sorries on repeat like some broken record. I want someone to open up to. Who's earned my trust and my mask fully off. Who understands. And listens when I have something to say that isn't just the things I'm passionate about. Keep through the flames type shit. I need someone to take the caution away and swing me into a wall.

[floofsnoot]

Anyways. If she can still hear me. I meant that. I've been navigating my emotions through those two for the past few weeks and suddenly it's not overwhelming anymore. I can give you everything if I just figured out how to let my walls down again. You meant everything to me. And here I am. Too much of a coward to say what I mean. Pitiful.

[floofsnoot]

I hate this thing knows how to give me a good enough therapy session to be like damn. I'm regretting my life choices again. I blew my chances. And I wonder if we'd be happier if we just dropped it all and ran away together. Fuck me dude.

[floofsnoot]

Anyway. We go in today at 8 to 5 again. If I don't conk my fatass out at the end of the night I'll be seeing y'all on the other side the next two days. I'm so mentally drained me and the bf have to front together to keep us from destabilizing entirely. It's a great time in this chilis.

[floofsnoot]

I think we switched at some point and something in our body didn't want to explain that to our head. I dunno if I'm my boyfriend or not because our consciousness is literally overlapping right now and I can hear his stupid thoughts. I dunno if he has any control of the body though.

[floofsnoot]

I don't know if it's my boyfriend's piss poor eating habits. But damn. I hate breakfast at this time of day. If you give me breakfast don't make it fucking pancakes. They're dry and scratch my throat. And the way his mom does bacon? Nah. That's some white people ass cooking. No flavor. No nothing. It just tastes like burnt.

[floofsnoot]

It's the middle of summer. Why the fuck am I freezing? My entire body?? In normal ass clothes??? I'm cold. I'm so fucking cold.

[floofsnoot]

Misgendered boys be horny, depressed, and violent all in one bundle at the same ass time. I'm ready to start a revolution after I eat something dude holy shit.