#cososchaptersyo

[crushingonrazz]

Merry Christmas Ollie

Ollie, you are one of the best friends I have ever had. My whole life has improved since I’ve met you, you just light up all of my sad moments and I can’t believe someone can even be as absolutely kind and dependable as you. So Merry Christmas, and I hope that this year gives you all the joy you so utterly deserve. 

Here’s a present! It’s under the cut, and I hope you like it! It is, surprisingly, not rottenberry. I wanted to give you something unique, something for you instead of what’s just easier for me. I wish I could give you more!

~~~

"The person you think of as yourself exists only for you and even you don't know who that is. Everyone else creates a version of 'you' in their head. You're not the same person to anyone. There are thousands of versions of you out there"

Slim is damaged.

He stands on back porches with a cigarette between two shaking fingers, staring up at the sky like it holds answers he’s been searching for his entire life. He grins at Sans’ puns out of the corner of his mouth, like he’s trying not to think they’re funny.

There have been so many times when he’s come out of an unoccupied room, and he just stiffens as soon as he sees the other people in this one. Sometimes he walks out. Sometimes he doesn’t. Either way, his eyelights go dim.

Looking down at Sans, he always seems to have a smile on his face. He’s not sure it’s ever been real, not sure he’d even know the difference if it was.

He’s a very good actor. At least, Sans would like to think so.

Slim is a force to be reckoned with.

For the most part, he tries to hide his power. But Fell has seen him angry, he’s seen him fighting. He’s never seen him fight for his life, but he thinks he might know how it looks. Fell has an image in his head, of fire and fury and magic. He’s pretty sure not even a different reality would change that perception.

When Slim takes a breath, his ribcage moves out. This is not unusual by any means, but it moves out like it’s a chore, as though taking in a breath is the most irritating thing he’s had to do this week. Fell wonders if he wishes he didn’t have to.

How many times has he seen power under Slim’s bones? Even sprawled across the couch, his magic is pulsing. Even lifting his brows in faux amusement sparks his eyelights, broadcasting his every expression for all to see. If it were Fell, he would have long ago brought the display of emotions under wraps. He’s certain, however, that what Slim broadcasts is not what he actually feels.

Slim is a disruption.

His constant joking is influencing Blue’s brother for the worse. His pranks are messing up the house and his habits are irritating. Slim is everything Blue doesn’t want, but he can’t help but pity him.

His relationship with his own brother has suffered. That much is obvious. Not even Blue dislikes him enough to blame him for that. Razz was never very good at being his brother.

He’s quiet. He’s far too quiet when he doesn’t have that shit-eating grin across his face. Blue knows he should prefer the happiness, the giant smiles and joking laughter. He doesn’t think he’ll ever admit that he prefers the quiet, not matter how damaged that silence may be. If he did admit it, he thinks Slim might laugh. Maybe to spite him, but more likely for the sake of the laughter. He doesn’t seem to care much what Blue thinks. That suits Blue fine.

Slim is always tired.

His eyelights seem to droop, despite the scientific impossibility. He’s always looking at the ground, but Red doesn’t mind bringing it up. It makes Slim laugh when he jokes that he’s looking for the nearest Sans. Once, he responded yes, he was looking for the nearest Sans. Where else was he going to find a good soccer ball?

Red laughed. Slim didn’t. But when Red looked up, his grin was crooked across his face, staring at a wall to his left with those tired eyelights. Slim didn’t make eye contact very often.

“I’ll bet you’d get a kick out of picking on a shorter guy.”

There was the laugh.

He never seems to sleep. Red could find him at midnight, hanging upside down in a tree by his knees, just to see if he could. It could be three in the morning, and Slim could be found watching movies on the couch, raiding the pantry, doing sit-ups on the floor in the hall. Once, Red thought he saw the other staring into the cutlery drawer, no lights in his sockets. He had been half-asleep at the time. Slim claimed to have been sleep-walking. Red informed him that you can’t sleep-walk without sleeping, and the look of shock on Slim’s face had looked genuine.

Red was really beginning to realize how often Slim lied.

Slim is hilarious.

He always has a joke on the tip of his tongue, is constantly getting caught in the middle of a prank. Stretch loves to listen to him run his mouth for two minutes for the sake of a one-word punchline. That happens fairly often, probably more than should be comedically acceptable, but when’s the last time either of them cared about acceptable comedy?

One of the best things in the world is the look on anyone’s face who’s just been pranked by Slim. Stretch’s pranks are genius, of course, but Slim’s are pure art. There’s no simple bucket on top of a door with him.

Of course, Stretch pretty commonly has to talk him down from physically harming or mentally abusing someone in the same of pranking, but that’s not his fault. He’s from a Fell world, after all.

Stretch sees himself in Slim. It terrifies him, most of the time. He doesn’t like himself, but in Slim it almost seems outwardly acceptable. The tendency to draw into himself, or to joke about things that are decidedly not funny, is one they share, but it fits Slim better. He’s smaller, he’s more broken. It makes sense.

Sometimes, Stretch isn’t sure if it’s envy or pity he feels when he looks at his friend.

Slim is a good person.

He is. And it frustrates Papyrus to no end that he refuses to believe it. He’s seen him do amazing things, be kind in ways he never would have imagined. But any time Papyrus tries to tell him that, Slim tells him to fuck off. He knows it’s meant to be friendly, that that’s just how Slim is, and he truly doesn’t mind the language. He just wishes Slim would believe it.

That’s not to say that he doesn’t scare Papyrus sometimes. It’s not to say that there haven’t been times he’s wanted to pick up the nearest book and swat him on the back of the head with it. Slim is kind, but he is also unbelievably frustrating.

But no one is perfect. No one ever has been and no one ever will be, and most of the people Papyrus knows didn’t have to go through what Slim has had to go through. It’s not that Slim has done his best, because he really hasn’t, but he’s survived. Coming out of a world like that unscathed or perfectly stable would be impossible. But Slim has come out of his world supportive and strong. He’s the best friend someone like Papyrus could have ever asked for.

And if Papyrus sometimes has to watch where he steps? Choose his words carefully and check the other’s reaction to what he does say? It’s worth it. Being there for someone like Slim will always be worth it, and he wouldn’t give it up for the world.

Even that time when Slim had tried to stab him. It’d been awkward the next day, with Slim refusing to make eye contact. It hadn’t taken long for Papyrus to figure out that he didn’t really feel bad. He didn’t seem to regret the act of trying to stab someone. He just wished he hadn’t tried to hurt Papyrus. He seemed to think that Papyrus was going to stop being his friend. Sometimes Slim could be really stupid.

Slim is broken.

Razz has known that his brother isn’t quite right inside for most of their lives. Some of it is his fault, he has no doubts about that, but even when they were very small, Slim’d had something in his eyes that had always thrown Razz off. He couldn’t put a name to it at the time, but as they’d grown, he’d thought maybe it had been mischief. Nowadays, though, it was something altogether more dangerous.

He had never been… good. He had never been kind. Their world was unkind, all on its own, but Slim never made much of an effort to be different. Razz supposed he had himself to blame for that. He had set the worst kind of example. Who could expect someone who couldn’t even be motivated to pick up his laundry to take his world into his own hands?

Maybe he should have expected it.

Now that they were safe, though… Razz wasn’t sure. He still didn’t think that Slim was, in the sense he was used to, good. He didn’t think he was unselfish. But he could see him trying. More than anything in their lives, it seemed that Slim craved peace. Peace like this world was dangling in front of his nose, like was offered to him in every corner of this place, if only he could leave his memories behind.

Apparently, that was the difficult part. Leaving it behind. No matter how much he seemed to want it, he was fellverse through and through.

It made Razz feel better, though. It had been Razz that led them down their path, that had inspired his brother to be anything but good. It only made sense that Razz should get the opportunity to pave the way towards peace.

Let Slim follow again in his footsteps.

Slim is…

Looking at himself in the mirror.

His fingers are trembling, but he can’t remember when he last had a cigarette. The shaking doesn’t concern him at the moment. His gloves are ripped, just a little bit up near the top. That does kind of concern him. These were fuckin’ expensive, what the fuck.

He shrugs at his reflection. Shoots it some finger guns. Stuffs his hands in his pockets, then pulls them back out.

Wow, he thinks. This is a shitty mirror. It’s making that guy look like a dumbass. His mind is telling him it’s not the mirror’s fault. His heart kindly tells his mind to fuck off. His mind is more than a little confused about what’s talking to it, seeing as he doesn’t actually have a heart.

He snickers to himself, grinning at the reflection staring back at him. Then he turns around, grabs his coat off the bed, and leaves the room.

The room doesn’t know if it feels lighter or not.

[crushingonrazz]

Lavender’s Blue

Read it on Ao3 here

Warnings for Major character death, child death, premature labor, angst, grief, I'm sure you can infer what's going to happen and that it isn't going to be good. None of the events are described in detail, you are just told what has just happened and left to deal with the emotional pain of it all, so it isn't as graphic as the chapter 100 stuff.

Support Me On Ko-Fi

Razz had never been much of a singer. His voice was low and grating, not quite hitting the right notes no matter if he was trying or not. He guessed there was some amount of enjoyment in belting it out if he didn’t care how he sounded, but pride had always been his big fatal flaw.

Pride and anger. It used to seem like that was all he was good for.

Of course, singing hadn’t ever been much of a thought in Swapfell. For the most part, it just wasn’t part of the culture. There were a few nursery rhymes, passed down from generation to generation, sung by parents to soothe the fears of their children. But he’d been in Underswap long enough now to explore the little things. Music was amazing, and being with Blue, especially, always ended up with him finding something new to enjoy.

“Lavender’s blue, dilly, dilly, lavender’s green…”

The sound of Blue’s voice, when he sang, had been rich and deep. He’d had this lilt to his speaking voice that had lended itself well to the music. Stretch had a gorgeous voice, rising and falling and hitting the notes and making your jaw drop that something like that could be coming out of someone like him, but Blue had a beauty all his own. Part of that was due to his enthusiasm, screaming out lyrics as he bounced to a beat, but it was to be admired even in his quiet moments.

Once, at some party at Alphys’, he’d been standing on a balcony, watching the stars as he sang under his breath. He was barely loud enough to be heard, and the lyrics would have been impossible to understand if Razz hadn’t already heard them out of Blue’s mouth about a thousand times. Drink in his hand, hips swaying to his own imagined melody, he’d certainly painted his own peaceful picture.

“When I am king, dilly, dilly, you shall be queen…”

Then Razz had tripped over the balcony’s threshold, swearing loudly and breaking the spell. Blue had laughed good-naturedly and helped him up, eyes flashing with warmth. Razz had been sure he would never experience anything so beautiful again.

But, of course, Blue seemed to make it his life’s mission to surprise him.

They never really got around to getting formally married. That would have required Stretch’s blessing, Slim’s agreement. Family was important in Underswap, and with as little as their brothers seemed to approve of it all, it just didn’t seem worth it. There were enough quiet nights, closed eyes and bonded souls, that no one, not even their little brothers, could deny what was right in front of their faces.

Blue and Razz didn’t need anything so formal for it to be clear who they would spend the rest of their lives with.

“Who told you so, dilly dilly, who told you so?”

Razz could still hear it, the sound of Blue’s voice ringing through the house. He’d walked into the kitchen, one afternoon four months ago, to find and appreciate the source of the music. Blue had been standing at the kitchen sink, doing the dishes. When he saw that Razz had entered, he’d smiled that beautiful smile, and Razz’s soul had just soared.

Blue was beautiful. He always had been. His voice, his eyes, his endless enthusiasm. Razz had never had anything like this, and even on the bad days, the days of silence and tears, Blue was everything. He was so much everything that Razz didn’t think he would ever understand it. And when Razz stepped forward that day, circling his arms around Blue’s waist and realizing that he couldn’t feel the bones past the ecto something that was summoned there, he thought that Blue had already given him everything.

“Twas mine own heart, dilly, dilly, that told me so.”

There had been shock, then doubt. Then, to his own immense surprise, there had been joy.

The LV12 former Captain of the Royal Guard, Personal Assassin to Her Majesty the Queen, was having a child. Being given a child. Blue had given him so many gifts already, so much kindness and love that it had just seemed to good to be true.

He… he really should have known that it was too good to be true.

He should have known.

Blue had such a large presence that it was easy to forget how physically small he was. How much magic was running through bones that, despite Blue’s avid protests, were childlike themselves in their size. Razz wasn’t a biologist, but it seemed obvious in hindsight. It made sense that having such an imbalance might have affected the way his pregnancy worked.

Logic may have been telling him, now, what went wrong. But it was too late. Logic could tell him whatever it wanted, but the dust pooled at Razz’s side, the blood coating his arms and shirt, was telling him that it was far too late to change any of it.

Blue loved to sing. Full of life, hope, laughter. He’d always hoped for Razz. Loved him, more than he deserved.

Razz loved Blue so much.

She looked just like him. Her eyes were bright and blue, her soul sparking, a smile formed on her face when she had first come into being. Her bones were small, too, but Razz was pretty sure that was more on account of the fact that she had been born so early. Far, far too early. He could see her magic trying to pulse through her, soul swelling as it failed to create the magic she needed to survive.

There was dust softly shimmering on her tiny ribcage. He wiped one shaking hand on the sheets, used a finger to brush away the dust. She wasn’t smiling anymore. He held her to his chest, drew his knees up, felt Blue’s dust shift in the bed beneath him. She was almost too tiny to be held like this. He didn’t care.

She whimpered, and his soul opened, pouring his magic into her. Anything he could spare, everything he couldn’t. Her soul didn’t look formed enough to absorb it. They hadn’t even given her a name yet.

Razz’s magic flowed into the dark air, surrounding them with purple light and glittering off of the dust covering it all. She started to cry.

It was a heartbroken sound, and tears filled Razz’s eyes as he heard it. God, it had all happened so fast. Blue was sick, a cold or something small, but his magic had been working hard to heal him, and he’d been exhausted. With much coaxing and threats, he’d been convinced to lay in bed and rest. Razz’s head had been on his chest, legs hanging haphazardly from the side of the bed as he read from a certain well-known book about a bunny, Blue laughing at the various silly voices Razz was directing as their unborn daughter.

When Stretch had found out about the kid, he’d immediately gone to a back room, sending what sounded like an entire country crashing to the floor before coming back with the book, all smiles as he handed it to Razz. It’d really been the only smile he’d ever given his brother’s soulmate.

God, he hadn’t even had a chance to call him, before it’d happened. Would things have been different, if he’d known? If he’d been there? What was he going to tell--

The baby was wailing now, and Razz’s shoulders shook alongside her, crying silently as the grief broke through the shell-shocked horror. He knew he had to do something, comfort her, anything. He was supposed to be her father, wasn’t he? And even if Blue had been the gentle one, the comforting one…

Well, Blue was gone.

“Los pollitos dicen pio, pio, pio…”

His voice came out stuttering and shattered, but still somehow audible. Carefully, he cradled his child, rocking back and forth in an attempt to calm her. Held close to his body like this, wrapped in his arms, he hoped she was warm. He couldn’t bring himself to leave her long enough to find something to wrap her in.

“Cuando t-tienen hambre, cuando tienen f-frio…”

Razz remembered singing this to Slim, to comfort him when he was scared. He remembered it being sung to him, too, but only vaguely. Gaster had certainly never sung it. He deemed nursery rhymes to be too common for his wards, even if he treated them no better than dogs. But a simple song had been all Razz’d had on those cold, dark days, just the two of them against the world.

“La g-gallina busca el maiz y el trigo…”

Her cries were growing weaker, the little fist that he hadn’t even realized was curled around his finger loosening. She blinked up at him, blue eyes making his soul clench.

“B-bajo de sus a las, a-acurrucaditos…”

She was so small. So still. Silent. His voice fell away, and then he held nothing but dust. Shaking hands rose to his face, pressed to his sockets. The most he could manage was a whisper.

“D-duermen… l-l-los pollitos--”

“Until tomorrow.”

Razz sobbed as he heard Blue’s voice, felt an arm circling his shoulders. He didn’t look up, knew he’d be gone if he did.

“Or is it ‘until the next day?’ You told me once, but I can never remember. How does the song go?”

“Hasta el otro d-dia,” Razz whispered. A hand cupped his face, tilted it up until he was looking into bright blue eyes. He didn’t need to look down to see their child held tightly in Blue’s free arm, to hear her giggling.

Blue wiped under Razz’s socket with a thumb, pressed a kiss to his temple. “‘Until the next day’ it is, then. What do you think?” His hand dropped to grab Razz’s, lifting him up to stand.

“Have you slept long enough?”

[crushingonrazz]

Merry Christmas Fresh

Hey, this year your present is actually on time! Somehow! 

I can’t even express to you the difference you have made in my life. You have been one of my closest friends for over a year now, and I do not know where I would be now if I hadn’t had your support through all of the shit. I am so lucky to have you and I will forever be grateful that you ever took the time to respond to a fan such a long time ago and that we’ve made it all the way here. 

Your present is under the cut, and it is one that I know you’ve wanted me to write for a very long time. I really hope you like it!!

~~~

Tick…tock…

Sans was rubbing his hands together, the repetitive motion drawing Papyrus’s eye for a split second. He looked away, huffing as he set glasses of water in front of the other occupants of the room before taking his own seat.

Tick...tock…

His brother’s red-eyed alternate had his arms tightly folded across his chest, not so much glaring at anything in particular as he seemed to be just kind of...glaring. He was fidgeting as well, though at least his shaking knee wasn’t making the same scraping noise of bone on bone that Sans was.

Tick…

The other version of Papyrus, however, was impossibly still, staring between the softer brothers as though expecting one of them to explode into a million pieces.

Tock…

“Okay!” Papyrus shot to his feet, hovering awkwardly for half a second before plopping directly back into his seat, glaring sternly at the copies of he and his brother that were sitting on his couch. They both turned to stare at him, and he sighed loudly, taking the angriest sip of water he could manage before returning to his glaring. “Where did you come from, exactly?!”

Fell, as he had introduced himself, snorted quietly, shifting to throw one leg over the other. “Hell.”

Papyrus sighed. He had hoped that, being another version of him, some measure of class might be shown. Apparently, he had been wrong.

“You laugh,” Red grumbled at Sans’ snickering, “But it’s true. What do you know about multiverse theory?”

Fell stood suddenly, armor gleaming in the living room lights as he straightened the cloth of his scarf. “I will be outside.”

“No, Fell. Sit down,” Red said, a light of exasperation coming into his eyes.

“Must we go over this for the thousandth time? Really?”

“Sit down.”

Papyrus blinked in shock at the tone, narrowing his eyes as Fell growled under his breath. Then, to his immense surprise, he returned to his seat, glaring down at the carpet. Red turned back to Sans and Papyrus. “Well? Multiverse theory?”

Sans spoke up haltingly, eyes darting between the other set of skeletons. “Any one of an infinite number of possibilities could become--”

“There’s a bunch of alternate universes, many versions of Sanses and Papyruses in a huge variety of worlds. We come from one where everyone is pissed, apparently, in comparison to yours.” Fell’s voice was monotone, but his eyelights were sharp, focused directly into an unasssuming darker spot on the coffee table. Sans closed his mouth slowly as Red sighed, reaching up to rub his forehead.

“Uh… yeah. That… that sounds…”

“Well, it was meant to be broken a bit more gently, but you get the idea,” Red grumbled, fixing Fell with a glare. “I’ve been doing some exploring, finding out how other worlds work, and someone asked to come with me before immediately breaking the machine.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake! It was an accident!”

“I told you not to touch the wiring! You just have no idea how to listen!”

“Who’s fault is that?!”

“Oh, who am I, your parent?”

“I refuse to laugh at your jokes, father. I simply and absolutely refuse.”

Papyrus blinks in the same moment that Sans sits up ramrod straight. There’s panic in his eyes as the other two fall silence, attention shifting from their bickering to their hosts.

“... ‘Father’?” he asks, and Red raises a brow.

“Yes? Fell’s my son--”

“Unfortunately.”

“--Just like the two of you.” He leans back on the cushion grinning amusedly to himself. “I was actually in a universe two weeks back that had a Papyrus as the father, and his son was a Sans. Now that was a bit of a--”

“Sans isn’t my dad!” Papyrus laughed, leaning against the arm of the couch. He didn’t notice the way that Fell’s brows were suddenly creeping up his face, eyelights focused perfectly on Sans. “He raised me, sure, but he’s my brother!”

The room went absolutely silent, Red staring at him in shock for a moment before he turned to face his alternate. “Brothers, huh?”

“Yes!” Papyrus faltered as he noticed the look on Sans’ face. “Yes, we are… Sans, are you okay?”

Sans nodded, rapidly at first and then more slowly as he seemed to realize how suspicious he looked. “Just fine, bro! Weird, huh, those universal differences! Hey Papyrus, would you mind grabbing some more water, it looks like Fell’s glass is getting--”

“Why are you lying to him?”

Red’s voice was even, more laden with curiosity than anger, but Papyrus could still see the emotion hidden deep in his eyelights. Slowly, he leaned back in his seat, gaze shifting quickly between his brother and Red.

There was… there was no way, was there? There was no way that even made sense…

“I’m not!”

But...there was the edge of a lie in Sans’ voice. By the looks on the others’ faces, it was obvious to them, too. Why would he…

Sans glanced at him, then back to Red. With a surge of magic, he disappeared from his seat on the couch. Papyrus recognized the reaction from the years they’d spent together, years of Papyrus needing to be able to predict when Sans was about to disappear, to predict where he was going to run away to this time. He would never leave Papyrus in danger. Never. But for someone like Sans, the ability to run away was absolutely priceless.

“Are you okay?”

He looked up to see the other two peering at him concernedly. He blinked, once, twice, three times. Then he shrugged.

“Of course I am. He’ll come back.”

[crushingonrazz]

THE ULTIMATE DRABBLE COLLECTION

...except its only stuff from my own work lmao. 

For some unknown reason, I thought it would be a fantastic idea to write five drabbles for all of my favorite stories written by myself, since I’m a narcissistic bastard and all. This took me like three weeks and is most of the reason why I haven’t been publishing anything else. It was supposed to be a megalovania-type thing, but I didn’t really stick to the time limit (oh well, what a shame, right?) I still stuck the songs and their links in, since I was listening to the songs while I was writing. 

Check out my ko-fi

For this Tumblr publication, I only am including one drabble from each of the 15 stories. For the other 60 drabbles, story links, and basic summaries to each story, you can go here.

~~ENJOY~~

The Undying - Drunk Enough to Say that I Love You - PLVTINUM

“Sans, are you okay?”

He laughed, teeth gritted and fists clenched. He was shaking again, she noticed. “Yup. Just fuckin’ peachy, Sparks.”

Undyne sighed as she reached out, awkwardly smacking his arm. “I’ve told you not to call me that.”

“Then stop being so goddamn fiery.”

She gave him a look, and he let out a semi-hysterical laugh. She sighed again, and his face fell, hands relaxing for a moment before he buried his face in them, murmuring unintelligibly. Undyne watched him for a moment, then drew in a breath, glancing towards the door to the servant’s quarters. “I might be able to scrounge something up from Grillby, if you’d like me to try.

He shook his head quickly. “Nah… I don’t want you gettin’ in trouble for my dumb ass again.”

She was quiet for a few minutes before she replied, “It’s not your fault.”

“...I know.”

Devoid - Heaven - Dalton Rapattoni

The only thing Red could think about, in those final moments, were how lucky he was, to have Sans by his side until the very end. His life had been so...lackluster, filled with pain and regret, until he’d met the other.

He counted himself lucky that he’d never have to live without him, and that Sans would never have to, either. Constantia would be fine, she would be happy. Their brothers would move on, find their happiness.

And he and Sans would be together.

He pulled the other closer, feeling him shift in his arms. As close as they were wrapped up in each other, it was going to be impossible to tell whose dust was whose. But that was for the best, really.

It only seemed to fit.

UnderAuthor - Cry - Carly Rae Jepsen

“So you just...you see the possibilities?” Sans was looking at him earnestly, and Author sighed as he nodded.

“Yes. I see what could have been, if a different decision had been made, if your physiology or your height was just slightly different. I see the scenes that play out, your levels, and if you’re the subject, I recieve your stream of consiousness.”

Blue hummed. “You must have seen us doing some strange things.”

“You would not believe the amount of times I’ve seen the lot of you having--” Author cut himself off as Red snickered, and he glared at him.

“Have I ever done anything really bad?” Blue asked, and Author shot him a look.

“You would know if you’ve done anything bad. The episodes, the Notes...they aren’t things that have actually happened. They only could have. I’ve explained this.”

“Do bad things happen in them more often than here?” Stretch asked curiously, and Author didn’t hesitate to nod.

“None of you would believe the things you would have been capable of, had things been different.”

Gay As Hell - Lose My Number - James Blundt

“Truth or Dare?”

Sans groaned loudly as Blue giggled, kicking his feet in the air. Sans shot him a glare before turning his attention back to Red and saying, “I’m not fucking playing this game with you.”

“Watch your language, Sans!”

Red just grinned. “Truth or Dare, Sans? Truth or Dare? Dare? Truth? Truth? Da--”

“Fine!” Sans shouted, prompting another round of laughter from Blue. “Truth!”

“Who do you like?”

Sans immediately turned bright blue, scoffing loudly and obviously as he rolled over and away from the two of them. “I’m sorry, Red, are we in middle school? What kind of uncreative--”

“So you do like someone!!” Blue shouted, jumping to his feet with a shout of victory. “Who is it?!”

Perceptions - My Heart Goes Bum Bum Bum - Flatsound

Red was surprised to see the other’s eyes soften as he looked at his little brother, the contrast from the first meeting with Stretch hitting him hard. Comic crossed the room and crouched next to Fell, looking at the book of mazes he was steadily working his way through. There was a moment of comfortable silence, then Red heard Comic say, “I really like your battle armor. It's the coolest.”

Fell looked up, his genuine smile practically lighting up the room. “Sans did. He is cool...I am…” he seemed to be searching for words.

Comic grinned over at him. “The coolest?” He supplied helpfully, and Fell laughed quietly.

Red had to turn his back to the scene before his brother could see the tears that were beginning to fill his eyes.

The Grass is Always Greener - If You’re Gonna Leave - PLVTINUM

“Does it ever get lonely?”

Red looked up, surprised to see Sans sitting at his side. He must have drifted off or something, not having noticed the other’s approach whatsoever. “What?”

Sans glanced over at him, and Red became aware of the sounds of Blue and Papyrus talking loudly in the kitchen. He resisted the urge to shake his head fondly.

“The resets. Do they get lonely?”

Raising a brow, Red suppressed a humorless smile. “Yeah. Here and there.”

Sans nodded. “Yeah… I’m… I’m glad I’m not the only one. I guess a lot of the others have had the same thing but I just… it isn’t the same. I can’t really talk to them.”

“But you can talk to me?”

“Well, duh,” said Sans, cheeks going blue as he fiddled with the hem of his jacket. “You’re my best friend.”

What?

Red just stared at him for a moment, fighting off surprise and denial. Sans was refusing to look at him, but after a moment, he glanced sideways, catching Red’s eyes. In response, Red grinned widely. “I’d be careful sayin’ that shit. I bite, y’know.”

Sans snorted. “Oh, believe me. I’m all too aware.”

Believe in Me - Perfect - Ed Sheeran

Red smiled, hands settled on the sides of Blue’s hips as the others were wrapped around his neck. Blue was grinning up at him, eyelights in the shape of hearts, and Red resisted the urge to lean down and kiss him (again). He could feel the beat of the other’s soul where their chests were pressed so closely together, and he felt his own skip a beat.

The music played softly over them, and while Red knew there was a crowd gathered around the two of them, watching them during their first dance, he couldn’t have cared less. All he wanted to see, all he wanted to take in?

Well, it was right here in front of him.

Blue was everything he ever could have wished for. He was everything right in the world, the worlds, even. He was the reason Red wanted to live, he was… well, he was his happiness. And how could he help that? Someone as bright as Blue, loving someone like Red?

He would never be able to even imagine how he came to be so lucky.

Roommate Bros - Flame - Tinashe

Lust grinned across the table, eyebrows waggling impressively. Fell was doing a truly amazing job in his attempt to ignore him, but honestly, they all knew it would never last.

As loudly as he could manage, Lust pushed his chair back, standing quickly to cross the room and stand just behind Fell. The other completely disregarded his existence, continuing to prepare dinner.

“Hey, edgelord.”

No reaction. Not even a twitch.

Lust cleared his throat. “Hey, your highness?”

It was almost impressive, the amount of resolve it must be taking to pretend he wasn’t hilarious. He’d been making puns for almost an hour now and he hadn’t been strangled yet. It was truly amazing.

“What’ll happen if I make another pun, but like… right by your face?”

Finally, Fell turned, hands pausing in their preparations to regard his roommate with something akin to disgust. “You’ll be royally fucked.”

A Night Off and a Dress - If I’m Lucky - Jason Derulo

“Hey, Cer?”

He looked to the side, smiling as he saw Carmine standing in the doorway. The smile faded, however, as the other fidgeted uncomfortably, something obviously on his mind. Quickly, Cer stood, gesturing him into their shared room in the servant’s quarters and closing the door behind him. “Are you okay?”

Carmine just stared at him for a moment, then his eyes dropped, and he collapsed down to sit on his bed, head in his hands. “I… uh… I may have fucked a member of the royal family.”

There was a pause.

“Wow,” said Cer. “That’s… illegal. Yeah. Sheesh. How dare you.”

“Thanks. That’s real helpful, assho--”

“No, I mean it,” said Cer again. He shifted his stance, arms hovering for a moment before settling on his hips in what he hoped was a reprimanding manner. “You are just… not allowed.”

Carmine stared up at his friend for about a full minute.

“Well, at least we’ll get executed together, I guess.”

Perseverance - Verge - Owl City

“Do you guys want to go see a movie?”

Sans looked up at the excited voice right next to his ear, blinking blearily until Blue’s face came into focus. He could feel Red stirring beside him, turning to press his face into his pillow.

Blue’s face fell as Sans groaned, then he grinned again as his arm came out of the blankets, reaching for where his phone was lying on the nightstand.

“Blue, it’s five am. Why are you even awake?”

“I wasn’t tired!” came the answer, and Sans turned to regard him doubtfully. Red seemed to be waking up more, reaching up to rub at his eyelights. Blue grinned hopefully at them both, and Sans sighed tiredly.

“I don’t think the movies is open yet, sweetheart.”

Blue rolled his eyes. “Well, obviously. I meant this afternoon! Since I have the day off today and I know you get off early! And we could go have breakfast for right now?”

Damn it. He looked so fucking hopeful.

Ignoring Red’s mumbled protests, Sans threw back the blanket, forcing himself to sit up. Blue’s eyelights brightened, and a huge smile bloomed across his face. It was contagious, even with how much Sans truly wanted to lay back down and go the fuck to sleep until a more reasonable hour.

“Breakfast sounds great. I have to warn you, I might use pancakes as a pillow.”

Unimaginable - Quiet Uptown - Kelly Clarkson

Blue’s hands were shaking, and he couldn’t seem to get them to stop. He clenched his fists tightly at his sides, under the blankets. That worked for a few minutes, but then his whole body started to tremble.

He drew his knees up to his chest, holding his breath and squeezing his eyes shut for about a split second before the popped back open, surveying the room. He had to know he was alone, he had to know that… that Stretch….

He rolled over, clenching his teeth and bringing his now-unclenched fingers up to his eyes. Rubbing carefully at the bone, he stifled a sob. He’d never felt so small, so helpless. He-- he couldn’t even fall asleep. Who knows what could happen if he did?

The house was absolutely silent, not even the ticking of the kitchen clock cutting through the tension in the air. Blue kept his eyes open wide, staring at the worn cloth of the couch in an effort to stay awake.

God, this had to be a mistake. There had to be some explanation, Stretch would never-- he was his brother, for Toriel’s sake, he wouldn’t--

Blue clenched his fists again. He didn’t like it when his fingers shook.

Discrete Trials - Ink - Coldplay

Fell watched doubtfully as Blue scaled the fence, pushing himself up and over the top before jumping down to land on the other side.

“This is stupid, and we’re going to get caught.”

Blue turned back to make a face at the other, putting his hands on his hips. “I’ll have you know that the Magnificent Blue never gets caught!”

“...Sure. So what are we going to tell Slim when he catches us?” Fell asked, pulling himself up and over the fence and landing lightly beside his stepbrother. He glanced around the garden, taking in the semi-overgrown shrubbery and impeccable lawn furniture. Slim certainly had his priorities.

“It’s Razz’s Sweet 16! I’m sure he’d be fiiiiiiiiine,” Blue said, grinning.

Fell just stared at him for a moment in disbelief. “Razz is fucking 17 years old, you idiot.”

Blue just laughed, dropping into a crouch and humming under his breath before scampering forward across the lawn. Fell stood there frozen as he went, then stage-whispered, “Are you humming the Mission Impo--”

“Shhhhhhh!”

Carefully and quietly, Blue eased the unlocked back door open, stepping into the laundry room and holding the door open for Fell. He gestured for the other to follow him down the hallway, then dropped back into a crouch. Fell rolled his eyes before complying, walking like a normal monster instead of an idiot who watched too many James--

The light flicked on, and they both froze, staring at the worn couch in the corner, currently holding a grinning Slim and his slightly more disapproving brother.

“So, boys,” Slim started, shifting in his seat as Razz crossed his arms, attempting to look disapproving. “I’m disappointed in you.”

Blue straightened up to stand, shamefaced, but Slim continued before either of them could apologize.

“Razz’s birthday started an entire two minutes ago. You are so late.”

Pain Game - Fuck Boy - Apashe

“I’ll kill you!” Red screamed, tugging desperately at his bonds, trying not to sob.

Blue didn’t even flinch, raising his knife until it pressed up on the bottom of Sans’ chin. Sans was gripping onto the arms of his chair, shivering in his attempt to keep still.

Red watched him, choking back a cry as he watched beads of marrow rise to the surface of the bone. Sans’ face stayed impassive, but he could see the pain in his eyelights, could feel it trickling past the barriers he had put around his soul.

“Blue, you fucking let him go! Don’t-- d-don’t--” His voice broke as Sans let out a gasp of pain, eyes flickering to his partners. They were filled with desperation, and as much as Red wished otherwise, he knew what Sans was asking of him.

But Sans had to know how impossible it was to--

Hanging his head, Red went still. He squeezed his eyes shut.

He just… he couldn’t watch this.

Taste of Silver, Taste of Gold - Autoerotique - Badman

Blue is gorgeous when he's covered in ashes, screams ringing out because of him, the blood of their enemies pooled around his feet. His eyes glimmer with bloodlust as they turn to meet Razz’s, and he grins as he shifts his feet, planting them solidly and raising the barrel of his gun up to his mouth like a candle before breathing out a stream of air over the smoke.

Razz laughs, cocking out a hip and letting the summoned bone construct he holds fall back to rest on one shoulder. Blue snorts, turning back to face the doors of the shop.

They can hear more sirens in the distance, but they're far off, and it would be easy to grab the prize and run, leaving behind the broken bodies of those who have already tried to stop them.

But as Blue fixes himself in front of the door, Razz steps forward, looping his fingers under the hem of his leather jacket and tugging him close enough so that he can press his tongue into his mouth, swallowing the other’s groan and feeling his hand curl tightly into the cloth of his shirt. Then they broke apart, but never thought to step away. It would be easy, just to leave.

But that would just be no fun at all.

String Theory - Breathe - Lauv

It really surprised the skeletons; how much their beliefs differed. Different undergrounds believed in entirely different paths; entirely different ends and beginnings and reasons for life. Humans would call it religion, but there was no belief in a higher power; only in themselves, and their creation from dust, and their eventual end, returning to the ground from which they came.

For no matter the universe, no matter the underground, there was no belief in an afterlife.

You returned to the ground, and that was it. Your life was over, and you were dust. Your dust was spread over something you valued, but it was symbolic; a memory for those you had left behind.

So even though Stretch held his brother’s dust, covering the blanket he himself had been wrapped in in so many photos from their childhood, it was only in memorial. Blue himself was not there, he was never going to be there, and Stretch was never going to see him again. There was no heaven, there was no hell, there was no deliberation about which Blue would have gone to; if such things existed.

And that was it. He was gone.

No matter how much Razz claimed to be able to see him.

[crushingonrazz]

Announcement (Hiatus)

So you all may have noticed my productivity dropping like a block of concrete lately… I’ve had a lot of real-life shit going on, so I just need to take a hiatus. It will be effective as soon as I post the chapter of COSOS that I’m just getting proofread, and it should (hopefully) end on or right before my birthday (November 11). I will still be active on Tumblr and with art, but don’t expect much writing (there will be three exceptions, listed under the cut) until then!

When I come back, my schedule will be as follows:

November 11 - String Theory Epilogue

November 18 - Final Chapter of ST Alt Path

November 25 - Final Installment of Betrayal

December 2 - Next Chapter of Pain Game

December 9 - Next Chapter of Discrete Trials

December 16 - Next Chapter of Unimaginable

Thank you so much for your patience, especially in regards to String Theory! Check under the cut for more details about my future scheduling and details about specific plans.

The three exceptions to my hiatus will be Taste of Silver because I adore that fic and wouldn’t stop working on it for the world, then a collab with a certain wonderful artist that I really need to finish my part for, and the prize for the writing contest!

Once I come off of hiatus, I will be forcing my multichap fic schedule down to once a week. You can still expect things like cosos and ST extras to get randomly updated after hiatus, and I will likely keep working on Taste of Silver with Ollie and just publishing upon chapter completion , but it will otherwise be just once a week.

Unfortunately, I can’t see myself actually finishing any of my currently running fics except for Taste of Silver and String Theory. I have no doubt that other projects will crop up, but Pain Game, Discrete Trials, and Unimaginable are more than likely going to be left unfinished, not to mention the eight or nine fics I have sitting on hiatus right now. The good news, however, is that it is my biggest pet peeve when authors update with a new chapter but all the chapter says is “this fic is over im really sorry guys”. I will never in a million years do that, so I plan to give each of these stories at least one more chapter, in which I will write the next chapter as I planned to write it, then include the summary of plans for the rest of the book at the end, and that will be the last chapter of the book. I am less likely to actually do this for my works on hiatus, but rest assured I will do it for the books listed above.

[crushingonrazz]

PROMPT IDEA: Razz gets drunk and mistakes Stretch for his brother

Stretch’s eyes flew open, awakened suddenly by a blast of cold air that signaled that his blanket had been lifted away from his body. He turned over, intending to groan loudly and tell Blue “five more minutes”, but before he could open his mouth, there was a press of warmth against his side and he looked down to see a little skull pressed to his chest. 

He thought at first that it was his brother, but as the other shifted, he became aware of a cold surface against his shirt-covered ribs, and realized that it was Razz’s armor. He made a face, reaching down with the intention of pushing the other way. The pretentious little shit had gone to the bar with the other Sanses earlier that night, and Stretch didn’t fancy getting thrown up on. Not to mention it wasn’t exactly his biggest dream to have this asshole in his bed. 

“I’m so tired, Papy.”

Stretch paused, staring down at the other as his shoulders started to shake. What in the—

“I’m so tired of being this way. I-I just…I want them to…I want them to like me. Why don’t they…” he sniffed, and Stretch’s face went slack as he finally realized that Razz was crying. 

“What the hell are you–”

“I guess I know why, but they like you! We’re brothers, Papy, w-why can’t they just…”

Oh.

Oh, he thought he was… 

Guilt flashed across Stretch’s soul as he carefully sat up, dragging the other up with him and adjusting so that he was picking the other up. Razz automatically wrapped his arms and legs around him, clinging on like a koala and shoving his face into the cloth of Stretch’s hoodie. 

“You smell different, Papy…” Razz’s voice was smaller than Stretch had ever heard it before, still laced with tears, and he sighed. Then he stood, carrying the smaller skeleton out of the room and down the hall to the spare bedroom Slim had been staying in since they’d all ended up in this timeline. 

Stretch knocked softly on the door, and it was almost immediately opened, Slim shooting him a betrayed look, probably for interrupting whatever it was Slim normally did, before catching sight of his brother. 

He sighed quietly, holding out his arms and taking Razz from Stretch’s hold, carefully disentangling the fingers that were clutched around the back of his neck. He nodded his thanks as Razz shifted into his hold, starting to cry again for no apparent reason. 

Stretch watched them for a moment, unsure how to react, then looked up, meeting Slim’s eyes. He struggled for words for a moment, then closed his mouth solidly and turned away, walking down the hall back to his own room. 

It was quiet for a moment, then Razz sobbed out something unintelligible, and Slim sighed, closing the door as he responded. Stretch couldn’t be sure, since his voice was so quiet, and he closed the door halfway, but he could have sworn…

“M’lord, they don’t need to accept you for you to be magnificent.”

[crushingonrazz]

If still take prompts, should write sweet fellcest :D <3, kisses, love u, bai

“Sans, you know I don’t like surprises.”

“That’s a lie, and you’ll like this one anyway, so shut up.”

Sans was dragging papyrus out onto the dance floor, onlookers cheering as they watched the newlyweds clasp hands. Why it was so exciting to watch two idiots who didn’t really know how to dance make a fool out of themselves, Papyrus had no idea. 

He looked down as Sans cleared his throat awkwardly, shifting in place and the grip of his hands tightening as he seemed to be searching for words. 

“Boss…”

He was adorable when he was like this, eyelights shifting in nervousness, unsure how to impress the other but knowing he wanted to. Papyrus wasn’t sure he’d ever seen a sight he loved more. 

“If you make fun of me for this, I’ll kill ya.”

Papyrus smirked as the first strains of a song started to play. As much as Sans might not believe him when he said it, he truly was the luckiest person in the underground, wasn’t he?

“Understood.”

[crushingonrazz]

Fourth of July Short

Sans hummed under his breath as he walked into the room, not really paying attention until he noticed Blue, standing there with a lighter and a firework and staring at him guiltily.  "Um...Hi? What are you doing?" he asked, cocking a brow.

Blue slowly put the lighter in his pocket. "Fireworks? Safely? Definitely not in the house?" 

Sans gave him a funny look. "I thought you said you weren't gonna do fireworks this year." 

Huffing, Blue threw his hands in the air. "Well, I lied, okay?" 

Sans frowned. "Well, what did July 4?" 

[crushingonrazz]

Hi ! Maybe some ClassicCherryBerry with a Red hurt and Sans and Blue who help him to get better ? =3 I love your writing, btw ;)

Red’s breaths were coming quickly, far too quickly, but he forced himself to keep them shallow. The injuries to his ribs were making every breath burn with pain, and he stumbled slightly as he walked up the steps, settling one hand on the handle to help himself keep his balance. 

Fuck, they were gonna kill him. 

Forcing himself to calm down a bit, he turned the handle and let himself into the house, glancing around the living room to make sure neither of his partners were in sight. They were not, and he didn’t hear any crashing coming from the kitchen, so it was entirely possible that he could make it upstairs, to the bathroom and to the first aid kit, without them ever even noticing he was injured. 

He closed the front door as quietly as he could before starting the harrowing journey across the living room floor, reaching the stairs before pausing to take a break, steadying himself on the railing and swearing under his breath. 

“Red? Are you o–”

He swore again, trying to straighten and damn near letting out a cry of pain at the sudden movement. He could feel his legs trying to give out from under him, so he carefully lowered himself to sit on the steps. 

Sans appeared in his field of vision, leaning forward worriedly before drawing in a sharp breath as he caught sight of his torn, marrow-covered T-shirt. 

“Blue! Get down here, bring the first aid kit!” he called, reaching out to help Red lean back against the next step. “Red, what the hell?” he asked, more quietly. 

Red could hear Blue crossing the landing, thankfully getting the supplies before he started asking questions, practically running down the stairs as he saw the way Red was sprawled, obviously injured. 

“Fuckin’ Underfell sucks,” he breathed as Blue opened the first aid kit, unpacking it with startling efficiency. Red made a mental note to ask him why he knew his way around it so well. Later, though, he thought as another wave of pain washed over him. Definitely later. 

“Why were you in underfell?!” Sans asked worriedly, hands hovering uncertainly over the cloth of his shirt as though unsure if he should move it. 

“Boss had some…” he winced as Blue batted Sans’ hands out of the way, summoning a bone construct to neatly cut away the cloth in the way of his ministrations. “Some business with Undyne. Didn’t go so well.”

“Red…”

“I know, I know, leave me aloAAHH! Fuck, Blue! Give me a little warning next time!” Red exclaimed, flinching away as Blue set his rib with probably a little more force than was necessary. 

Blue just glared at him, reaching for a bandage. “Give us a little warning before you go try to get yourself killed, then!” Red was surprised to see tears brimming in his eyes, and he blinked. 

“Blue…” 

“Oh, shut up and talk to Sans. Move your arm.” The words didn’t contain any real vehemence, but Red could hear the worry laced through every word. He glanced over to Sans, who did his best to glare at him. The expression was somewhat ineffective, though, as he immediately reached out and grabbed hold of Red’s hand, lacing their fingers together. 

“Red, if you ever do this again…”

“Yeah, I know…” he grinned shakily. “Next time I’ll be sure to just have Boss patch me up. A little tough love, y’know–ow!”

“Blue, maybe you shouldn’t hit him until he’s healed?”

Support Me ~~~ Commission Me

[crushingonrazz]

Shitpost

Support this madness

“SANS WHAT THE FUCK”

Red sighed. That would be his brother. Well, fuck this universe.

Suddenly and magically, the living room was no longer his living room. Boss was sitting in front of him, but holy fuck that wasn’t boss. Boss wouldn’t wear whatever the fuck color that was, what was this guy, a traffic cone?

Wait I don’t know what a traffic cone is I grew up in a world without cars thought Red, and it confused him.

The high-looking Not-Boss on the couch looked at him for a minute or two, then turned around and yelled into the kitchen. “SANS I DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT THIS GUY LOOKS SHADY AS HELL”

A tiny blue skeleton sprinted into the other room, also looking high, but on an entirely different brand of narcotics. “PAPY DON’T SWEAR IT’S NOT GOOD FOR YOU”

“We don’t even have real throats, we’re skeletons and I don’t think I can get lung cancer.”

“That’s the wrong lecture, Papy”

“Oh.. Okay well Imma go wash my hair, bye dudes” And with a poof he disappeared.

Red was confused, which made sense. This was a confusing situation. This little blue skeleton looked a whole awful lot like him and there was obviously some shit going down. Maybe this little shit knew something.

“HI! MY NAME IS SANS!”

The little shit didn’t know anything, did he?

Fuck.

Well, time to get angry now.

“No, my name is Sans. Fuck off, you little…” This was his moment, he had to come up with the perfect insult, something to make the little shit cry his baby-blue eyes out, something to scar him for life, something that would get Red an entertaining reaction. “...blueberry!”

What?

“What?” Blueberry said, looking confused. Red agreed.

“I don’t know, where am I?”

“You’re in underswap!”

“How did you know that?”

“Because the author didn’t want to bother writing us figuring out we’re alternates of each other. Did you know we’re alternates of each other?”

“Makes a lot of sense, after all I also enjoy dressing like a five year old in my free time.”

“Papy taught me never to judge, so I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that!”

Red groaned. Well that was enough social interaction for the day. He flopped down on the couch and decided to live here with them because obviously the alternates of his two least favorite people in the underground would be the best choices for roommates. It makes perfect sense what are you talking about.

“Is there any food here?”

“Apparently I only make tacos and I’m not even very good at it. You’d think someone with my determination and adorable face would have my shit together by now but apparently not”

“I thought you weren’t supposed to swear”

“The author made me rant”

“Fuck the author”

“Speaking of which, I’m also a 25 year old who doesn’t know what sex is, can you tell me?”

“No. Do you have any mustard?”

“...what?”

“I drink it directly from the bottle, go get me some”

Blue disappeared for a moment and returned with a bear. Red jumped in surprise, then realized it was just a bear-shaped container of honey. Thank goodness, that could have been bad. “This is all we have, since I only make tacos and my brother only drinks honey. We have very well rounded diets as you can see.”

“Hey, I have an idea.”

“Okay!”

“Fuck off”

Blue seemed to consider the idea, then he brightened, his eyelights shaping themselves into stars. “I have a better idea!”

Red doubted it. Fucking off had been a pretty stellar idea. “What?”

“Let’s fall in love instead!”

“Ugh, no. That's hard.”

“Pleeeeaaaaaase?” Blue was being very cute. I don’t know how, but he was, believe me.

“Okay, fine. Boss is always telling me to go fuck myself I suppose I might as well do it”

“What does that mean?”

“Seriously, you said you were 25 and you don’t know this shit?”

The end

[crushingonrazz]

React

This is not part of the OT3 timeline, I just felt like breaking some hearts with this ship. You're welcome.

I love the headcanon where Red has only had the human come through once, just with a bunch of saves and loads, because they are genuinely kind and they don't want to hurt anyone. Then, of course, Blue has never been through a reset (because that's the Orangey Asshole's job XD) So that leaves Sans alone with the experience. Fun fun fun for everyone!

Violence and self-harm warnings. Everyone is a dick except Blue, as usual.

Support Me

Sans slammed his plate into the sink, spinning around to face Red. He was sitting at the table, and he didn’t immediately seem to notice the other’s outrage. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Red looked shocked at his outburst, eyes wide as he reveiwed what he had said. He didn’t seem to find any immediate fault in it, his brow knitting in confusion.

And damn it if that didn’t piss Sans off even more.

“Just...don’t even bother!” he yelled, stalking out of the room and passing a very confused Blue on the way.

“Sans? What--”

“I would tell you to ask him --” Sans gestured at where Red had appeared around the edge of the doorway, looking absolutely flabbergasted. “--but he can’t even figure out what he fucking did!”

Blue stood still for a moment, watching him stomp up the stairs. “...Then why don’t you tell him what he did so that he can--”

“Because if I try, I’ll say something I’ll regret!”

He slammed the door shut behind him, and after a moment, Blue slowly turned to look at Red, raising a brow.

“Dare I even ask?”

Sans wiped angrily at the tears leaking from his eye sockets, trying to force himself to stop crying. To say the least, it didn’t work. He was curled up in bed, facing away from the door with his knees tucked up into his chest.

They had no idea. Neither of them. They had no goddamn idea what it was like, how it felt to--

The door creaked open, a stream of light accompanying the new arrival. “Go fuck yourself,” Sans mumbled, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment.

“I’m not Red, so I won’t make a poorly-constructed joke out of that.”

Sans choked on a snicker as Blue stepped into the room, closing the door carefully behind him and coming to sit on the edge of the bed. Sans was reminded, suddenly, of days back underground, when he had woken up and immediately wanted to go back to sleep. He’d been...not tired, exactly, though exhaustion was almost always pulling down on his body in those days. He’d just not wanted to be awake, to have to force a smile anymore, to escape back into the abyss of his dreams and never come back. On those days, Papyrus would come into his room, sitting on the edge of the bed just like Blue was doing now, lending his semi-silent companionship in a usually fruitless attempt to help him get out of his own mind.

He squeezed his eyes shut again, blocking out the memories as best he could.

“Please tell me what’s wrong?”

Sans hesitated for a moment before he cracked his eyes open, glancing up at the other. Blue was looking at him so earnestly, so full of hope and love, just like he always did.

Sans sighed, turning back over and burying his face into his pillow. “You wouldn’t understand.”

There was a beat of silence, then the bed creaked as Blue pushed himself up to lay next to him, wrapping his arms around Sans and pulling him in close. “I can try?”

Sans tensed slightly in the hold before making himself relax, taking deep breaths as he willed himself not to cry. “D-does your brother ever...does he ever have nightmares? Like, really bad ones, where he wakes up screaming?”

Blue stiffened slightly against him, and Sans took that as a yes, pushing onwards. “I used to get those. Really bad, I would just...Paps said my magic would all react to it, and it looked like I was on fire. But then…” he paused, searching for words. His tears seemed to have disappeared, a cold sort of emptiness replacing it as he found himself half-lost in his memories. “Then the resets started. The bad ones, where the human k-killed everyone. And it sort of started to feel like maybe it was real life that was the nightmare. It didn’t even feel real , sometimes. So I thought...you know...maybe I just needed to wake up?” His voice broke, which confused him. He felt Blue’s grip on him tighten, and he glanced down at where he could see the other’s arms wrapped around him, reaching up to trail his fingers along the bones, grounding himself in the act and the feeling of his lover pressed so tightly against him. His mind started to come back, and he shook his head slightly, pulling himself out of the past and into the present.

“Red thinks he...he knows how I…” he took a shuddering breath, then continued shakily. “He keeps...making comments, like he...like he understands it. Like he knows what it felt like, because he’s had a different sort of...of pain. Do you...am I making sense?”

“...What did he say?”

Sans blinked slightly at the somewhat unexpected question. He’d honestly expected Blue to just kiss the side of his head and tell him that Yes, of course you make sense. It’s all going to be alright, I’m sure you’ll feel better!

“He made a pun about resetting. Something about how I should re-set the table before you “took a page out of our book” and judged me.”

There was a strangely uncomfortable silence, then Blue loosened his hold slightly before saying, “Don’t you think you might be overreacting a little bit?”

Sans stiffened completely, his eyes narrowing. What?

Blue hugged him tighter again, backpedaling quickly. “I’m not saying that what you just told me, about the resets, isn’t something to be upset over. Not at all, I completely...I just...I don’t think Red meant to--”

Sans pulled away violently, pushing himself up to sit and glaring down at Blue. The other looked extremely uncomfortable, as though unsure how to dig himself out of the hole he knew he had just dug himself into. He sat up slowly, looking at Sans as his face flushed slightly. “Sans, I know you don’t want to hear it, but he’s sorry, I’m sure. If you told him what you just told me, he would--”

“And how the hell would you know that?!”

Blue flinched slightly at the tone of Sans’ voice, looking as though he was at a complete loss for words.

“You aren’t like us! You have even less of an idea of how his mind works than I do! Y-you’re just...a perfect little version of us that’s never had a hard day in his life!”

Blue’s mouth dropped open, and his sockets darkened slightly before he pushed himself off the bed and stood, walking quickly out of the room and slamming the door behind him. Sans felt an empty sort of satisfaction at the action, proof that the angel wasn’t perfectly happy all the time.

Then guilt washed over him, and he brought his knees up to his chest, lowering his head and beginning to sob.

Red was sitting on the couch, wringing his hands and staring blankly at the floor, when he heard the door slam. He glanced up, surprised to see that the angry one was now Blue. He stood cautiously, worried, for a moment, that he’d accidentally done something so horrendous that now everyone was mad at him. Blue spotted him, his eyes immediately flooding over with tears, his vulnerability all too apparent as he began to cry quietly, descending the stairs quickly and disappearing into the kitchen.

Red just stood there for a few moments, trying to decide if it would make things worse to try and comfort him.

He was still standing there, stuck in indecision, when the bedroom door creaked open and Sans peeked through, his face streaked with his blue-dyed tears. He came downstairs cautiously, looking around uncertainly for a moment and avoiding Red’s eye. Red took a deep breath, then crossed the room, bringing his arms up to offer a hug.

Sans shot him a glare, and he dropped them immediately, his face falling. He shoved his hands deep into his coat pockets, looking down at the ground before he got up the courage to speak in the face of his very angry boyfriend.

“Sans, I’m really sorry. I don’t know what I did, but I--”

Sans huffed, looking away. “I’m not down here to listen to your apologies. I’m here to apologize to Blue.”

Red narrowed his eyes. “What did you do to Blue?”

A look of extreme guilt passed through his face before he ducked his head, folding his arms against his chest and staring blankly down at the floor. “I...I told him he didn’t understand. B-because he’s not...like us?”

“ Excuse me?”

Sans glared up at him, any trace of guilt gone at Red’s tone. “Shut the fuck up, he was taking your damn side! Of course I got upset!”

Red’s mouth was hanging open, unable to believe that the other had taken out his unexplained anger on the kindest person in the multiverse. “What the fuck did I even do ?!”

“You were making puns about the damn resets!”

Red snorted slightly, throwing his hands up into the air. “Are you kidding me?! That’s what you’re so pissed about? It’s not even a problem an--”

Sans stepped forward suddenly, getting into Red’s face and causing him to take a step back. “Why the hell would you think it’s okay to joke about the worst thing that’s ever happened to me?”

Red glared at him. “Shut your damn...Everyone’s makin’ jokes about my damn LV, or jumping out from around corners and scarin’ the ever-living shit outta me, thinking they’re hilarious! You get used to it!”

Sans pushed away the tears threatening to reform in his sockets. “That doesn’t make it okay for you to--”

“No, it just makes it okay to fuckin’ hurt Blue! What the hell is wrong with me ?! Seriously?!”

“You have no idea what it’s like!”

“Do I have to? My life was as shitty as they come! You couldn’t step outside without getting dust in your damn mouth!”

“At least you never had to watch Papyrus die! At least you didn’t have to live in a world that kept repeating, over and over and over again!” Red opened his mouth, but Sans kept talking, yelling over him. “At least you n-never...broke your own damn fingers, just to see how far you c-could push your HP, just for one thing to be fucking different! You’ve never had to murder the same damn demon in a child’s body a thousand times in a row just because they couldn’t seem to dodge your fucking blasters, even though you know they’ve done this a million times by now!” His chest was heaving, and Red looked as though he’d been stabbed.

Behind him, there was a small noise, and he turned to see Blue standing behind  him in the kitchen doorway, his arms wrapped around himself. He was staring at Sans blankly, perfect little angelic tears running down his face.

Sans hesitated, then took half a step forward. Before he could make any move to comfort him, however, Red was there, tucking Blue’s head into his chest and shushing him softly as he started to sob. Something in Sans’ soul hardened, and he folded his arms across his ribcage, glaring at the floor as he came to a decision, somewhere in the irrational part of his mind.

“Fucking fine, then. It’s not like you need me.”

He spun around, snatching his coat off of the back of the couch and throwing it over his shoulders. Behind him, the others stared after him blankly, not piecing together exactly what was going on. It was as he wrenched open the front door that Blue cried out, “S-sans, no, wait--”

Sans slammed the door behind him, the tears that had been filling his eyes for some time finally pooling over and streaking his face.

They would never understand.

[crushingonrazz]

Breaking Free

More fucking rottenberry

Check out this cool link that definitely isn’t my ko-fi shhhh

Razz resisted the urge to crack a smile, a nearly impossible feat with Blue dancing like he’d never heard of the concept right in front of him. Everyone had gone out for drinks, and a few of them had had a few too many. Sans was passed out, his head on his brother’s shoulder, and Fell was laughing loudly at every single thing Stretch said.

Drinking had always loosened Blue up to a degree no one had even really thought possible, with how open he already was. But here he was, dancing completely off-beat but extremely enthusiastically to a song that really wasn’t meant to be danced to. He attempted to body roll, and Razz couldn’t keep in his snort of laughter. Blue turned his mega-watt grin on him, repeating the motion again before attempting to...well, Razz wasn’t really sure what the hell he was trying to do, but it just about made him laugh again.

“Damn, Razz, I didn’t think you could laugh,” Stretch said, prompting a loud and out-of-place laugh from Fell. Everyone paused to stare at him, Red’s expression bordering on humiliation. Razz held in another laugh, then rolled his eyes at the others.

“Of course I laugh. Have you seen this bullshit?”

Blue crinkled his brow, mock-insulted, and said, “Hey, now, you don’t have to be rude! I’m a magnificent dancer!”

Razz snorted, and Stretch smacked him on the arm to keep him from saying anything insulting. “Come on, Razz. You couldn’t do much better at anything than Blue. He’s the best at it all.”

“OH YEAH?!”

Slim cringed when he heard the challenge in Razz’s voice, reaching out to grab him by the shoulder and prevent him from shooting to his feet and making a fool out of himself. Blue was watching the display with interest, holding in a smirk as he considered a truly amazing idea.

“I’ll tell you what I’m the best at!” he said, his eyes wide and innocent.

Razz regarded him icily. He was well aware that this was Blue’s false innocent look, and he had long since learned to be wary of it. No matter how much he loved the little shit, he was still  a little shit .

After an extended moment of silence, Stretch sighed and asked, “What are you the best at, bro?”

“Karaoke!”

Razz threw his hands in the air palms-out, shaking his head rapidly. He knew exactly where this was going, and he wasn’t about to--

Blue grabbed his hands, practically bouncing with excitement as his false expression shifted into something more real, excited and happy in a way that never failed to make Razz’s soul beat harder. “Please? Come sing with me, it’ll be fun!”

“Yeah, Razz, go sing with him, it’ll be fun.”

Razz turned to see that it was Red who had spoken, but all of them were wearing matching smug expressions, already sure of his negative answer and ready to give him grief about it. Well, fuck them.

“Yeah, okay. Let’s go. I’ll show you how it’s done, Berry,” he said determinedly, pushing himself up to stand and keeping hold of Blue’s hand as he started to walk to the stage. Blue’s expression morphed into one of surprise, glancing over his shoulder at the others. They were all watching them with mixed expressions of amusement and confusion, so he just shrugged and went along with it. Who knows, it could be fun.

Wait.

“Did you just call me ‘Berry’?”

They arrived at the stage, and Razz gestured for Blue to pick a song. Blue raised a brow, glaring at his boyfriend. He knew he hated that nickname. Huffily, he turned to the list, reading it over for something good. His eyes passed over something he vaguely recognized, then snapped back up to it.

He smirked.

“That one, please!”

Razz glanced nervously at their little group as someone handed him a microphone. They were all watching them with amusement, both Stretch and Slim holding up their phones and obviously recording them. Red was snickering behind his hand, and Papyrus was gently waking up Sans so that he wouldn’t miss it. Maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea.

The music started, a slower piano that Razz recognized much more quickly than he would have if he hadn’t gotten really bored on Netflix a few weeks ago. He shot a glare over at Blue, who winked happily, gesturing for him to start.

Razz coughed, turning his attention to the screen and nearly missing his cue before quietly singing, “We’re soarin’, flyin’...” His gaze flicked over to Blue, who was trying to hide a smile, and he gathered himself quickly, his voice growing louder. “There’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach…”

He could see the others’ amusement at the song choice, but he did his best to ignore it, instead choosing to focus on the screen in front of him. The color of the text changed, and Blue came in, singing enthusiastically and just enough out of tune to make Razz crack a smile. He knew the other could sing perfectly well; he was doing this on purpose.

“If we’re tryin’, so we’re breaking free…”

Blue grinned at him again, and Razz shot him a wink, his voice growing in volume if not skill. “You know the world can see us, in a way that’s different than who we are!”

“Creating space between us,” Blue sang loudly, stretching out one arm towrds Razz in a dramatic rendition of performance. “‘Til we’re separate hearts.”

Razz took a deep breath as they came in together, very pointedly ignoring the sarcastic thumbs-ups they were recieving from their table. “But your faith, it gives me strength…” Blue looked up at him again, and Razz shot him a wink. Blue’s face flushed lightly, and he grinned, his voice faltering in surprise. “Strength to believe…”

Razz took a deep breath, then threw one arm out, bending forward slightly and squeezing his eyes shut in an attempt to deliver as much power as he could to the next line. “WE’RE BREAKING FREE!!”

Instead of Blue’s actual part, there was just a lot of surprised laughter, but Razz didn’t let it deter him, swaying back and forth and singing, “FLYYYIINNNN’!”

Blue managed to come back in, still laughing, and they sang together, “There’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach!”

“IF WE’RE TRYIN’!”

Razz could hear more laughter coming from the table, but he decided to revel in it, opening his eyes and flipping off the cameras of their brothers as they continued to sing. Blue was still laughing almost too hard to join him, especially when Razz attempted to spin Blue around and just got them both tangled in the microphone cords.

As the song ended, Razz planted a quick kiss on the side of Blue’s head, grinning at the continued laughter as he untangled them and handed the microphones back to the manager, who was smiling widely. He grabbed Blue by the hand and lead him back to the table, sitting down quickly and crossing his legs before picking up his drink and taking a sip.

He was perfectly aware of everyone staring at him, but he just patted the place beside him and waited for Blue to sit before wrapping an arm around his shoulders and looking around as though nothing had happened at all.

“M’lord?”

Razz rolled his eyes at the empty title, but directed his attention to his brother anyway. “What?”

“How the fuck did you know the words with your eyes closed?”

[crushingonrazz]

Sleeping Together

In which there is platonic CherryBerry, and while blue isn’t innocent, he definitely does not think before he speaks.

Support Me

Red had always had trouble sleeping. Whether from nightmares or the strangely ironic phenomenon of being too tired to fall asleep, he was always hovering on the verge of exhaustion.

When he was a child, he had always gone to Papyrus, sitting beside his crib and watching the rise and fall of his brother’s chest and letting it lull him into a doze, which seemed to be as close as he could get. Of course, once Papyrus got old enough to talk, he told Red to stay the hell out of his room and stop watching him like a creepy fucker. That was just the kind of loving relationship they had, and that’s what had lasted through the rest of their childhood and far into their adult lives. Red didn’t mind. Strangely enough, he enjoyed the relationship with his brother. Something touchy-feely just wouldn’t have made sense in the world they lived in.

It was only once he met Blue that he realized the cause of his troubles. It was strange, really, that he had gone so long without knowing that the reason he could never fall asleep was because he was so incredibly alone . It was even more strange that he only figured it out when he wasn’t alone anymore.

They weren’t...together. Not really. Neither of them really had an interest in things like that. They were close, sure, but Red certainly didn’t feel any romantic overtones, and he was almost completely certain that Blue felt the same way. Red had never really had a best friend before, but from what he’d heard, this is what it felt like. He could tell Blue anything and everything, open up in a way he hadn’t really even known was possible, let alone felt this good. Blue shared himself in return, letting his false smile fall from his face, a more quiet contentment coming in to replace his usual excitable personality. They could stay up until all hours, talking about nothing while also managing to express the deepest parts of them like they’d never been able to before.

It was on one such night that Blue asked why he never slept. Red shrugged and explained that he’d always had trouble with it, only very rarely being able to relax enough to fall asleep on purpose and otherwise just passing out when his body could no longer handle it. Blue had looked thoughtful, his naturally optimistic mind immediately looking for ways to solve the problem.

“What if I read you a bedtime story?”

Red had given him a doubtful look, to which Blue rolled his eyes. “I’m perfectly aware that you are not a child. It’s not the story that helps you fall asleep, it’s the…” He paused, searching for words. “It’s the person reading to you. The voice, the whole...atmosphere of it. It’s peaceful, you know?”

That sounded...well, to be honest, it sounded stupid as hell, but Blue was looking at him in that hopeful way he did sometimes, and Red just couldn’t get himself to actually tell him that. So he’d agreed, and the smaller had jumped up, grabbing him by the arm and practically dragging him up the stairs to their shared room. He pushed him over, and Red fell onto the air mattress that had become his bed in the time since he’d ended up here. He started laughing at the abruptness of it, and Blue grinned at him over his shoulder before grabbing a book and coming back, forcibly shoving Red over so that he could sit next to him, book in hand and back against the wall. He grabbed the blanket and pulled it up, throwing it over Red’s face and practically shoving the ends of it under him, trapping him in a well-constructed burrito trap, rendering him unable to move. Red laughed harder, wiggling helplessly for a moment before Blue smacked him with the book, giving him a look that clearly said to shut the fuck up and let him read.

The really weird part of this whole thing was that it worked . Blue read some stupid book about a bunny, and Red didn’t listen to a single word, but he fell asleep in just a few minutes. When he woke up the next morning, Blue was in his own bed, and Red was still trapped in his blanket burrito, but he wasn’t...he wasn’t tired . It took him a moment to come to terms with it, but when he did, he smiled more widely than he thought he ever had before, tears filling his eyes for a moment before he blinked them away, rolling his eyes at his own lame emotions.

The next night, Blue read to him again. This time it was a random book about physics he’d grabbed off of his bookshelf, but the inflections in his voice and the wide gestures he made with his arms could have made you believe that he was reading a grand tale of an epic adventure. Red laughed a bit, but before he knew it, his eyes had fallen shut and he was asleep.

It became a pattern, any night that Blue was home, he would read to Red. And Red would sleep. For the first time in his life, he would sleep all the way through the night, and he didn’t wake up screaming. It was surreal.

Once, he and Blue were up late, talking as usual, sitting on Blue’s bed and utterly unconcerned with the fact that it was far past midnight. Blue was caught up in a story about Alphys, a story Red had already heard many times before but never failed to make him laugh. It was only a few minutes into the story, however, that Red’s eyes shut and his head fell sideways to rest on Blue’s shoulder.

He didn’t think he’d ever even thought about what it would feel like to wake up next to someone. He’d never had the desire to be romantic with anyone, and that felt like something that could only ever be romantic. But the way he woke up, relaxed and warm and so incredibly happy almost made him wish he could do this all the time. Of course, Blue echoed his thought aloud almost immediately upon Red waking up. This was something that was happening with increasing frequency, and Red wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about having someone think so much like he did that they seemed to be able to read his mind.

But he was so damn comfortable…

So they went with it. Their nightly routine changed places, and Red went to sleep next to him every night and woke up every morning warm and feeling safe in a way he’d never even imagined before.

Yesterday had been a weird morning. He’d woken up alone, which felt strange in and of itself, but it was because Blue was staying the night with Alphys. It was starting to get easier to fall asleep without him, probably because his body was getting used to this new occurrence called sleep. But he still missed him, not wanting to get up when the room seemed so much colder than usual. He did it anyway, of course, knowing that if Blue got home and both he and Stretch were still in bed, there would be hell and very long lectures to pay.

He was home now, of course, and Red was just on the verge of waking up. His head was tucked into Blue’s chest and Blue had one arm around his shoulders, his free hand holding his phone as he checked his texts or played a game or whatever he did in the morning while he waited for Red to wake up.

Blue noticed his eyes blinking open and shut off his phone, setting it aside and grinning down at him. “Sleep well?”

Red just groaned and squeezed his eyes shut again, causing Blue to chuckle slightly before he started to roll off to the side, planning to get out of bed and stop lazing around. He would never leave Red to wake up alone, but Blue wasn’t one to waste time, so he tended to get up fairly quickly once he opened his eyes. Today, though, Red’s soul clenched at the thought of being left alone. Maybe it was the residual loneliness from the morning before, maybe it was the fact that it was a few degrees colder than usual in the room, he didn’t know, but he reached out and grabbed Blue around the waist, pulling him back against him and prompting the other to burst out into surprised laughter.

“Red, what are you--”

“Five more minutes, Blue, pleeaaasseee?”

Blue snorted and settled back into bed, wrapping him back up and allowing himself to relax. “Fine. Five minutes. I’m timing you.”

Red laughed and let his eyes drift shut, absorbing as much of this feeling as he possibly could. “How was your day yesterday?”

He felt Blue shrug. “It was fine. I got some training done, and Alphys complimented me on my magic control again!”

Red grinned at the repressed excitement in the other’s voice. As much as his friend pretended to be hyper and narcissistically optimistic, he was still generally happy and excited about life. Compliments, though he automatically reacted with an “I know” instead of a “thank you”, meant a lot to him.

“Of course she did. You can change the shape of your eyelights. I don’t know anyone else that has enough control to do that.”

Blue shifted slightly, and Red knew he was blushing by the way he could hear him rubbing his cheeks in a vain attempt to make it go away. He snorted slightly, and Blue bonked him on the head. “Shut up, I can’t help it. I have too much magic in my system, you know that!”

“So do I, but you don’t see my cheeks goin’ all pink like a blushing bride, do ya?”

Blue smacked him again. “No, you just light up your eyes all the time so that you can pretend to be a bada...so you can pretend to be hardcore!”

Red snorted as Blue censored himself, then propped himself up slightly, looking down at him and pushing magic to smoke from his eyes. “Pretend, huh?”

Blue raised a brow, and started poking at Red’s ribs, causing him to burst into surprised giggles, trying to push Blue away and failing. “Yes, pretend. You are so not that--

In that moment, the door was pushed open, and Stretch walked into the room, opening his mouth to speak but coming to a complete stop at the sight that greeted him.

Blue still had his hands on Red’s ribs, and both of their faces were colored in bright flushes. In trying to get away from the hold the other had on him, Red had somehow managed to lay halfway across him in a way that probably looked extremely odd.

They all just stared at each other for a moment, then Stretch backed out the door, slamming it shut behind him and yelling, “Oh my god , Sans, lock the door next time!”

Red burst out laughing, causing Blue to mock-glare up at him before pushing him off good-naturedly and getting up to follow his brother. Red was left to laugh as Blue opened the door and walked out, yelling back, “There was no reason to lock the door! Red and I sleep together all the time!”

Red started shaking with a whole new round of laughter, hands pressed over his eyes as he felt his face heat up.

“Well I don’t want to have to see it!” Stretch yelled back, and from the sound of it, he was almost to the front door. Red was hit with the mental image of Stretch doing his best to escape into the depths of Snowdin while Blue chased after him, yelling things that definitely needed more context, and he had to take a few deep breaths to stop himself from snorting with laughter.

[crushingonrazz]

This Means War

I love Rottenberry a lot

Support Me

Razz unlocked the front door, staring down at his phone in confusion. He’d just gotten home from work, and just as he’d walked up the front steps, he had received a text message from his boyfriend that said, “Prepare yourself! ;D”

Thanks to years in the royal guard, the training for which had been interspersed with random practice attacks (courtesy of Alphys), Razz was pretty sure he was usually very well-prepared for any situation. ‘Expect the unexpected’ had become so much a part of his daily life that he wasn’t really sure what qualified as actually being unexpected at this point. But...prepare for what ?

This wasn’t exactly likely to be something life-threatening, based on the smiley face usage, and that pretty much sapped him of his usual ideas for surprises.

He absentmindedly kicked his shoes off at the door before turning to toss his keys into the bowl that sat on a table by the door, only to be brought up short by what else was already there. Right beside the pet rock, there was a...contraption. Razz picked it up, considering it carefully, turning it over in his hands until he realized what it was, a huge smile lighting up his face.

Still grinning, he picked up the note that had been placed right next to the big-ass Nerf gun.

I hope you prepared yourself!

Almost as soon as he finished reading the last word, something struck him in the side of the face, followed by the sound of quiet giggles and shuffling. Razz immediately leapt into action, dropping the note and vaulting over the back of the armchair, taking shelter behind it and looking around carefully to find the source of the projectile.

He caught a flash of something blue, and immediately aimed his own weapon, firing quickly before ducking back behind his cover, stifling laughter.

There was a yelp of surprise, then quickly retreating footsteps, and he grinned, spinning out from behind the chair and raising the gun as he stood, getting two quick shots at the other’s retreating back. The giggles increased tenfold, and Blue took shelter around the corner of the kitchen doorway. Razz crouched, making his careful way across the room towards where he knew the other was hiding.

Blue peeked out, getting off a few shots and connecting with Razz’s chestplate before the return fire made him duck back into hiding. Razz chuckled, picking up the other’s ammo and loading his own gun with it before rising again to stand seamlessly. He finished crossing the room silently, hiding just on the other side of where he knew Blue was hiding.

After a moment, Blue peeked around again, bringing up his gun and looking confused at the empty room. Before he had a chance to spot him, Razz reached out and grabbed the other’s gun, pulling him out into the room and shooting him point-blank in the ribcage.

Blue was giggling breathlessly, trying to pull his gun back before Razz shot him again. Finally, he just let go and made to duck back around the corner again, but Razz dropped the gun and grabbed his arm, pulling him back out and into his hold.

Blue struggled for a moment before relaxing back into the other, grinning up at him as innocently as he could. “I’ll accept your surrender in writing!”

Razz snorted, setting his own gun down and wrapping both arms around his boyfriend. “I’m fairly certain I was the winner of that battle, thank you very much.”

Blue continued grinning up at him, and Razz snorted again at the false innocence in the expression. He raised a brow, loosening his hold slightly as he tried to see what he was missing, realizing far too late that this had been Blue’s plan all--

Blue spun around in his arms, reaching down and attacking Razz’s ribs with pokes and tickles, smiling up at him all the while.

Razz huffed, trying to keep his laughter from bursting out, a task which was almost impossible with the growing sensation. He stumbled back slightly, running into the wall, and Blue took advantage of the fact, pinning him and continuing his attack. Razz began laughing, hard enough that his soul was constricting because of his decreased magic flow. He was weakly trying to bat the other’s hands away and failing, only causing Blue’s smile to grow wider.

Finally, he cried, “Fine! Ha! I surrender! Heh, please stop, I surr-ee-surrender!”

Blue jumped back, pumping one fist in the air and doing a little victory dance. “The Sansational Blue is victorious once again!”

Razz grimaced, then gave a loud war cry, flying forward and body-checking the other over the back of the couch and onto the cushions. Blue just continued his laughter, grinning up at him for a moment before reaching out and wrapping his arms around the back of the other’s neck, pulling him down for a quick kiss before he winked at him mischievously.

“I don’t think that’s quite what surrendering is supposed to look like, Razzy.”

“I don’t think that’s quite what beating me in a fair fight was supposed to look like either.”

Blue just laughed, nuzzling into him and sighing softly. Razz adjusted himself so that he wasn’t so awkwardly positioned, holding the other close and letting his eyes fall closed.

Life was almost too perfect.

[crushingonrazz]

Prank War

Razz is just entirely too much fun to fuck with

Support Me

Read this on Ao3

“Have you gained some weight?”

Sans glared down at Red from where he was perched on the other’s shoulders, trying to decide if he should even gratify that with a response. He settled on just turning back to look over the bush, resuming his stakeout as though the other hadn’t said a thing.

“Seriously, Sans, you weigh a fuckton, what’s up with that?”

Sans rolled his eyes, rubbing his sockets before he growled, “Do you wanna have a bad time? Because I’m about this close--,” he held his fingers very close together within the other’s sight, then continued. “--to showing you to the dangerous end of a Gaster Blaster.”

Red snorted, then shifted his position slightly, trying his very best to see through the bush despite the fact that it had long since been established that it was far too thick for that. “What is he doing?”

Sans returned his attention to the reason he was on Red’s shoulders in the first place. “He's just laying there.” He looked closer, squinting. “I think he might be about to fall asleep.”

Red hummed slightly, his excitement showing in the brightness of his eyelights.

Sans watched for a while longer, trying to remain inconspicuous despite the fact that he was currently the top half of a double-stack of smug asshole. He was peering over a bush at the back of the Swapfell brothers’ property, an activity that probably would have been dangerous if they weren’t two of the most powerful beings in the multiverse.

Well, if Razz or Slim saw them, they would still be screwed, but Sans was pretty sure that they wouldn’t actually kill them. At least, he hoped not.

Razz had been still for a good fifteen minutes when Sans finally whispered, “Okay, let me down.” Red used his blue magic to lift Sans up and drop him on his feet beside him. He let out an exaggerated groan of relief, and Sans glared at him out of the corner of his eye before turning around and picking up The Bag.

The Bag was actually owned by Stretch, but it had been a simple matter to bribe Blue into getting it for them without the other’s knowledge. It was filled with the tools of his trade, if being an asshole was a trade.

Sans and Red snuck carefully across the yard, going to the front door, where Red dropped to one knee and began picking the lock. Sans glanced around nervously, watching out for anyone watching them. Just because Slim was currently at the bar didn’t mean he’d stay at the bar, after all, and if he saw them breaking into his house, they’d have a slim (heh) chance of making it to the machine before he caught them.

The door opened and they quietly stepped inside, Sans searching their surroundings once more before closing the door behind them.

“This is a terrible idea,” came Red’s voice from behind him, and Sans turned to see his alternate staring into the living room, a worried look on his face. Sans followed his gaze to see a line of leather crops laid out on the coffee table, and he had to stifle a laugh at the casualness of it. No, we don’t need potted plants here in SwapFell, he thought, We put out our torture devices/sex toys as decoration! His giggling started to get the best of him, and Red clapped a hand over his mouth, giving a meaningful look at the door behind which their goal lay.

When Sans finally had ahold of himself, they walked across the room and started up the stairs. They avoided the creaky steps with practiced ease, used to sneaking around their own houses, and when they reached the landing, it was a simple manner to stay silent until they reached the second door.

Red placed a hand on the handle, then turned to face Sans. Ready? He mouthed, and Sans nodded. He eased the door open, then beckoned for Sans to precede him. He shot the other a dirty look, knowing that Red just didn’t want to go in first in case Razz was somehow awake, but proceeded anyway.

As his eyes adjusted to the dark, he took in the sight in front of him. Razz was curled around a pillow, his face peaceful and his eyes closed, breathing softly. The little shit was almost cute.

Red appeared at his side, having left the door slightly ajar in case they needed a quick escape. He nudged Sans, and pointed at the bedside table, where there was a little book clearly labeled “Diary”.

Sans glared at him and shook his head, and Red gave him an exaggerated frown of disappointment. He started to sign something in hands, but Sans flipped him off before he could get more than a word or two in.

They crossed the room to stand beside the other’s bed, and Sans finally set The Bag down, kneeling beside it to dig through in search of what they needed. Finally, he grinned, standing back up and holding out a Sharpie and a can of shaving cream towards Red.

Red muffled a spurt of laughter that threatened to give them away, then he took the Sharpie, going closer to Razz as Sans quietly opened the can, opting to forgo shaking it.

As he walked to join Red, however, Razz moved, causing them both to freeze in their tracks, staring down at him with almost the exact same expression of horror on their faces. After a moment of terrified silence, however, Razz seemed to relax again, his breathing slowing back down and a quiet snore slipping out of his mouth. They breathed a sigh of relief, and Red carefully knelt on the bed to reach the other’s face, very carefully beginning to draw the outline of a ridiculous pair of glasses around the other’s eye sockets.

Sans giggled silently for a moment before going to the other side of the bed and making a very impressive Afro of shaving cream on and around the sleeping skeleton’s head. Red finished the glasses and started on a large curlicue mustache as Sans finished his own artwork and stood back up, crossing to The Bag and grabbing a container of honey before returning. He began to dribble the sticky liquid on the ribs that were exposed, deciding not to be creepy and pull the blanket down any farther than it already was.

Sans had just finished with the honey and Red was three letters into writing the word “loser” on the other’s forehead when they heard a door shut downstairs and footsteps begin to cross the living room to the stairs. They froze, making panicked eye contact, before Red stuck the Sharpie in a pocket and began signing rapidly, to which Sans just stared at him in confusion before shaking his head quickly. This was not the time for complicated battle plans.

He got off the bed quickly, running as quietly as he could for The Bag before turning and beckoning to the other to come closer.

Red obeyed, and as soon as he was in range, Sans grabbed his arm, preparing to take a shortcut. The door cracked open just as he gathered his magic, taking them out of the room with a loud crack .

Slim’s drunk mind wasn’t quite sure how to process the scene before him. Had that been Sans and Red? What had they been doing here?

At the crack, Razz had snapped awake, sitting up quickly and almost immediately realizing that something was wrong. He raised one hand to his sternum, and when it came away sticky, he swore loudly.

Slim had done a lot of hard things in his life. He’d lived through far too many resets, been dusted and tortured and a thousand other things. But he could quite honestly say that the most difficult thing he had ever done was trying not to laugh as he turned to face his brother.

Razz, the captain of the royal guard, bringer of pain and misery to his enemies, quite honestly one of the most powerful people in the underground, had been...decorated. There was shaving cream on his head, what looked like honey on his ribs, and Slim didn’t even know where to begin with what was happening on his face.

Razz caught the look of suppressed hilarity, and frowned deeply. “What?!” he growled.

Well fuck. There was no good answer here, was there? He edged back towards the door, planning to make an escape to his room so that he could let this out where he wouldn’t get in trouble for it, but Razz stopped him with a gesture. “What?” he repeated, looking angry. “Is there more than just the honey?”

Slim whined slightly as he had to place a hand over his own mouth to stop the laughter that was far too close to breaking out. Once he had collected himself, he straightened his back, then, trying not to smile, said, “They seem to be getting better at the glasses, m’Lord, but their spelling could use some work.”

Razz’s eyes widened as he caught the implications of what the other was saying, and he leaped out of bed, running for the bathroom in just his shorts.

Slim was only able to keep his giggling quiet until he heard the bathroom door slam and the loud screech that followed the other reaching the mirror.

“THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!”

[crushingonrazz]

Idea I had that I have no idea how to write

I fuckin’ love Halloween so much, guys. It’s my favorite holiday so of course I have a ton of funny ideas about it but this one might take the cake.

I’m all for Sans dressing up as a skeleton for Halloween or taping a piece of paper on his chest that says “costume” but think about this: The Sanses dressing up as each other.

Lust dressing as Razz with all the armor and his spine showing and everything, but manages as always to make it look like it’s a stripper costume with how he’s standing and walking and Razz just gets so pissed because “ARMOR IS FUNCTIONAL AND SAVES LIVES, ITS NOT TO PARADE AROUND LIKE YOU’RE TRYING TO GET FUCKED” (”Everything is for parading around in to get fucked, edgelord”)

Blue dressing as Red, leather jacket with the furry hood and the red tank top and converse and everything. No one can decide if he’s adorable with all the fluff around his face, or if he’s hot af because it turns out leather jackets look 500% better on people that actually work out. Either way, Red is salty that Blue looks better in his outfit than he does. 

Sans dressing as Lust and, as usual, not really giving a fuck about how revealing it is except to complain pretty constantly about how tight the pants are (”How do you even move in these??”). He also can’t stop running his fingers through the fur because Lust’s coat is the softest out of the au’s. 

Red dressing as Sans and generally being pissed about the slippers. Also, not-so-secretly adoring being able to wear Sans’ jacket because Sans smells really fucking good. 

Razz dressing as Blue and starting to realize that he really likes loose pants. But for some reason the damn boots don’t quite fit so he’s constantly tripping and just getting very enraged. 

And then, after having some fun and making some jokes like “ha, ha, Papyrus, you can’t tell us apart, can you?” and everyone’s gotten used to it, these jokester fuckers go into the bathroom halfway through the party and trade costumes just to confuse the fuck out of everyone all over again.