#everybody that ive met through my years of social media and school have really changed my life . and idk what i wouldve done | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

overton2015 · 7 years

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2:06 AM

I have begun to realize just how stressed and down right exhausted i have become. Im sad. I don’t take care of myself like i should. I would even say i do the bare minimum just to keep me going. I know i need help, but how can you ask for help when you don’t even know whats going on.

In 2015 i learned how to truly start loving myself. “Everything was beautiful and nothing could hurt.” During this fragile time i met a boy. We began dating about 7-8 months after we met. He was spiritually and emotionally beautiful. We found life in each other. I never thought i would have to worry about my future after that, cause it was him. I thought this to be my only other true love besides my first. We were naively happy. We supported each other and loved each other for who were, and what we were becoming. We met each others friends and families, and feel even more in love with the idea that these were the people we would surround ourselves with. After about 4-5 months of me practically living with him we started talking about moving in together.( My plans before him were to move to Chattanooga,TN and attend Chatt State Comm. College.) We talked it over for a couple weeks, and we both decided Chattanooga was the place for us. To save money he gave up his room in an apartment he shared with 2 of his friends, and we moved in with my mom to save money. This is where things began to get a little less easy for us. As you would imagine once we became distracted with more and more worldly things, we began to loose that spirituality i loved so much. I didn't pay much attention to this, because we weren't having any problems we couldn't fix, and i mean c’mon i loved him. But what i didn't notice, and what should have been my upmost importance was not loosing myself in our problems and our relationship.

He began making remarks like, “oh, who are you wearing that makeup for?,” “why are you getting all dressed up?,” or even “Who do you keep changing your hair for?” ( I have had many different fashion shades in my hair) I did it all to keep his interest and for his validation. One of my biggest insecurities is my body, as it is for most people. When i didn't get the validation i thought i needed i began criticizing myself so much, i almost began to hate myself. Soon things started getting sen worse. He alienated me from my friends, and would give me excuses like they are good people, and they are going to get me into trouble with dumb things. So to appease the arguing i began seeing my friends less and less, and started looking to him for my identity. I was no longer my own person. I didn't have a taste in music, and i would look to his advice for what to wear, yet somehow, this was still not enough.

Even better, i was upfront about a few things before we started dating:

1. I am still friends with all of my exes, because i don't believe that somebody who meant so much to your life should be excluded just because you don't see a forever together.

2. DO NOT CURSE TOWARDS ME IN ANY KIND OF NEGATIVE MANNER. you might as well have layed hands on me

Now, as you can expect he called me a bitch for the first time in a fight. I laid down the law and said if he did it again i would leave him . He did it again. I didn't leave him, but he apologized and cried, so he meant it right? Wrong. He kept doing it and even though i would fight with him about not doing that i didn't stop him. So at this point I'm to busy stressing about money, work, school, amongst other things to notice just how hallow of a shell of a person i had become.

I was taking abuse up and down, left and right, but i loved him? He could always be the way he was and we could always still be just as happy as we were before. I just need to get my act together, i would tell myself.

My mom bought us an i pad, after, she realized wes was always using my laptop for games and i was falling behind on my online courses. Well, as you can probably foresee he took advantage of this thoughtful gift to use it against me.

I was texting a good friend of mine from hs, mind you we had our own set of problems but she was none the less my friend. As everybody at the time did, she told me i should leave him. She didn't go into detail about what he was doing wrong or anything he had done to hurt me. She said she just wants to see me happy and she didn't think i was. I didn't agree with her, but i didn't disagree with her either. We didn't spend much time on this topic, but wes saw it by going through my messages coming in on the i pad. While i couldn't get to my phone this particular saturday, because we work by ourselves, he took it upon himself to message her as if being me. However, he always made the fatal flaw of never sounding like me in his messages. I think he was more obsessed with saying what he had to, rather than actually putting it in my own words. So she caught on pretty quickly that it wasn't me, and it wasn't long before i noticed there messages sent to her that weren't mine. I immediately called wes to tell him how wrong he was for doing that, and he turned it right around on me. He was saying things like, “How could you let your friends talk about me this way,” and i started explaining that no matter what anybody says it all comes down to how i feel about the other person. I even tried to comfort him by saying that it happens with most of my ex’s, but nothing calmed him. It got much, much worse. It went from him texting jamie as me, to him just texting her, to @ing each other on twitter. I was consistantly going back and forth between trying to focus on the store and trying to tame my personal life. They were taking turns showing each other their cows without real scratching. Empty threats and just hurtful words back and forth about each other and anybody they can involve. Since this made its way to social media, a few of my other friends found themselves getting involved for a brief moment as well. Neither side was really looking for a resolution. They were all just looking for entertainment. Nobody did what they did for me, or to help me. When everything stopped, I asked everybody to take down what they had posted because I didn't agree with anybody's actions. Everybody agreed, and did so except wesley and Jamie. They were the only ones to give me grief about deleting their post. At this point i had given up. I only fought with wesley to take down his posts and i just couldn't handle the extra stress from jamie. It was all too much.

I was always the one apologizing, even when it wasn't my fault. He has a mystical way of manipulating the situations we put ourselves in. Im just a nagging bitch, who can't keep my legs closed i guess. Even if consciously i didn't believe what he was saying about me i still absorbed that hate, but i held it internally against myself.

It wasn't just emotional, psychological, and mental abuse. It got physical a few times. Ive been thrown against a wall, dragged in a house over concrete steps, scratching up the entire backs of my calves ( i told my friends and co-workers i was drunk and slipped on the very same stairs). I have had my arm crushed in a cast iron door, and to be honest this is the first time I'm telling anybody, and there is nobody to listen.

We were sitting his animals at his parents one weekend while they were out of town. I don't even remember the fight, but i remember running away from him. I remember anytime he got close to me i couldn't breathe and i just needed to not be in his house or near him. He continued to follow me around the very house he also would let me out of. He took my keys so it didn't do me any good to try and leave his house anyway. At this point I'm physically suffocating, crying so hard i can't see where I'm running. I find a way to lock myself in the bathroom. Alone with me in this bathroom was a pocket knife he would keep with him. I contemplated cutting. Holding the knife on my thigh and gently rubbing it on the skin i was ready to tear to pieces. I paused to look out the window at the sky and saw him. taking pictures of me. yelling, “You’re fucking crazy, you psycho bitch.” He even went as far to send the picture to my phone and save them in my album, just so i could look at them.

Don’t get me wrong i tried to leave a few times but it always ended the same way. He was going to hurt himself or our dog, he had possession of after being kicked out of my moms house. Of course he made many threats, towards me and others, that never held any truth, but there is always that one time he could. So out of fear that he would hurt himself or our dog, i stayed.

this went on for a year.

Finally, i worked up the courage to leave him. It did not go well. We were in the car and i was driving. I was talking to him about on the way to his house where i planned to drop him off and go home. That didn't happen like that. He started playing with the wheel and trying to throw us off the road. I ended up parking in a church parking lot where he proceeded to get out of the car. Now i know with the way he was i should have just left, but he made sure to grab my phone before exiting. He then began going through it, because there could be no there logical reason for me to leave him unless for another person. Atleast, thats how he saw it. He even went as far, after i got out to retrieve my phone, to take the keys out of the ignition. I was tired of running after him so i sat in the car and locked the doors. Well he walked a ways away, but came back. He told me he had thrown my keys in the grass of the front lawn of this church. This wasn't even true. When he refused to look for the keys i got out to do it myself. He then jumped in and started the car acting as if he would leave me there. I got in the car and he drove us to his parents. All along the way he just kept saying I'm not leaving him and we aren't over. Once at his parents i told him i was leaving, which caused yet another scene. This actually promoted his parents to come outside. HIs mom was trying to beth him to let me leave and when he wouldn't listen to her she went and got his father. During this time he got in his car and parked at the end of the driveway so i couldn't leave. His father came to my window and said he would call the cops and i just needed to drive through the yard. I didn't want him to be in such a position with his parents. I even started giving in a little saying i would take him somewhere else, seeing as he didn't want to stay at his parents. I ended up being able to leave that night and go home around 2 AM. This all started at about 6 in the evening.

From this moment out this began to get overwhelming. He showed up at my house and even walked through the door that leads straight to my room. I didm answer when he knocked originally. He was basically squatting on my front porch till i talked to him. He was telling me once again all the things he was going to do to change and make up for all the bad stuff. So to appease his need for communication i gave in and said we could keep contact through texting, but only as i wished. Of course i didn't text back a whole lot and kept my distance as much as possible. Being the manipulator he was, he knew what to say to get me to respond, and i did. When he began being hostile again about my lack of communication i blocked him on all platforms of communication. He didn't give up.

He found a way to contact me. *67. He would call me repeatedly one after the other until i picked up or one of our phones died. I checked my phone one morning and found he had accumulated 380 missed calls in what i thought was 36 hours. He later corrected me to tell me it was 24 not 36.

Of course he knew where i worked and he used that to his advantage. Knowing only one person works on weekend days, he would call from *67 to my work line, knowing i had to pick up each call, and i would repeatedly hang up. it was easily over 100 phone calls to the work phone alone. Customers were beginning to notice.

After all of this i finally took the advice my friends had been giving me for months. I filed for an order of protection.

wrote this a few days ago

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taryn-ryder · 6 years

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Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett officially split: A look at their ups and downs

Happier times: Hank Baskett and Kendra Wilkinson in May 2013. (Photo: Jerod Harris/WireImage)

After eight years of marriage, Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett have announced their separation. On Friday, the former Girls Next Door star confirmed the news in an emotional Instagram post.

“I will forever love Hank and be open but for now we have chosen to go our own ways,” Wilkinson, 32, shared. “I’m beyond sad and heartbroken because i did believe in forever, that’s why i said yes but unfortunately too much fear has gotten in the way.” The reality star went on to say there’s “no hate” and that she and Baskett will continue to spend time together with their two children: son Hank Baskett IV, 8, and daughter Alijah Mary Baskett, 3.

According to TMZ, Wilkinson filed legal documents for a divorce Friday afternoon. She reportedly listed January 1, 2018 as the date of separation and cited the reason as irreconcilable differences.

It’s been a bumpy journey for the pair over their decade-long relationship. Take a look back at their ups and downs.

2008 to 2009

The pair had a whirlwind romance after meeting in March 2008. Wilkinson was ready to move on from being Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend and a member of E!’s Girls Next Door … even though she wanted to start the next chapter of her life at the Playboy Mansion. That’s where the couple tied the knot in the summer of 2009.

Months later they endured their first obstacle as Baskett, then a wide receiver for the Philadelphia Eagles, was released. However, he quickly found a home in Indianapolis, signing with the Colts. Personally, things seemed to be going great, as the couple welcomed their first child together, son Hank IV, in December.

2010

Baskett’s NFL career took a tumble … or rather, fumble. He had a costly mistake in the 2010 Super Bowl, fumbling an onside kick that helped lead the Saints to victory over the Colts. Wilkinson was visibly upset following the game, leaving the stadium in tears. Baskett was released by Indianapolis, but the Eagles picked him up for the 2010-11 season, only to cut him (again) after two games. He was picked up by the Minnesota Vikings, but Wilkinson did not move there with him.

“It’s actually a blessing in disguise,” she explained on the Today show, clarifying they weren’t separated. “We get a chance to know each other all over again and communicate.”

Ultimately, Baskett’s football career ended in Minnesota when his option wasn’t picked up at the end of the season.

The couple was also hit with a personal scandal. Wilkinson’s sex tape with a former high school boyfriend was released, which she called the “hardest time of our lives.”

“It broke my heart because how can you do that when I have a baby?” she said on her solo E! show, Kendra. “I have a kid. I have a husband. It just sucks.”

She added, “It’s hard on [Hank] because it involves another guy, of course, and it’s hard on him because of our son and everything. … He’s like, ‘Kendra, we just have to hold our heads high because, yeah, we’re going to get attacked, but we can’t run. We have to hold hands and walk through this and face this fact.’ It’s going to be really hard. It’s going to probably be the hardest time of our lives.”

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case, as a harder time was around the corner.

2011

In an interview with In Touch, Wilkinson revealed she suffered with postpartum depression after giving birth, which she believed was partly triggered by their move to Indiana.

“I felt devastated, helpless — like I was in a black hole,” she said. “I even thought of harming myself. I just threatened [suicide] a lot.” She also admitted it led to marital problems. “Hank deserved better than me,” she believed, adding, “Hank and I slept in separate bedrooms.”

“There were times when I knew I was about to snap. I’d be like, ‘Hank, go! Go away!’ I didn’t feel right. Hank would take the baby and leave the room,” she recalled, fearing their marriage was over. “I was just mean,” she exclaimed, saying she would blame Baskett for “their unstable home life,” threatening to leave him with Baby Hank if he didn’t find a steady job.

2014

In May, Wilkinson gave birth to their second child, daughter Alijah. However, their baby bliss didn’t last for long. Shortly after welcoming their little girl, the pair’s marriage was rocked by reports that Baskett had an affair with a transgender model while Wilkinson was eight months’ pregnant.

After discovering the headlines to be true, Wilkinson threw their wedding photos in the pool and flushed her wedding ring down the toilet. On an episode of her show Kendra on Top, she even admitted to suicidal thoughts.

“I was at a real low,” she told the camera. “I even questioned my life. If it wasn’t for breastfeeding Alijah, the bond I had with her, I feel like I would have probably ended my life. I felt like I’m not even supposed to be here.”

Wilkinson took her husband back in an attempt to save their marriage.

Kendra Wilkinson steps out without her wedding ring in October 2014. (Photo: D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)

2015

A year after the allegation, Baskett acknowledged the incident, saying he made a mistake. “I messed up,” a teary-eyed Baskett told People in 2015. “And everything through me brought pain upon this family.”

Baskett claimed he was “fondled” through his basketball shorts against his will by the woman after putting himself “in a bad situation,” but that he didn’t participate in a sexual act. “I was this big former football player,” he told the magazine. “I was the alpha male. I could do anything to protect my family, but I couldn’t protect myself.”

Wilkinson added, “Hank was very naive and gullible. He thinks everybody is his friend. That led him to the hell that we’ve lived. … I don’t say the word ‘cheat.’ I can say he was not loyal to me. I don’t care about the act. I care about how he reacted to it and how I was told by the media what happened. That scarred me.”

In the same sit-down, Baskett told People he was depressed after his NFL career ended. “The stress and depression was eating away at me,” he exclaimed, saying one of his lowest points came near the end of 2013. “I fell into what happens to a lot of professional athletes who change careers. It hit me, and it hit hard. … My biggest insecurity was looking like a failure. I made it to the NFL, I was a smart kid, I was the A student.”

“I was pregnant during his most depressing time in his life,” Wilkinson added. “Anytime he said, ‘Kendra, I’m not feeling too good,’ I would say, ‘Shut up, I’m pregnant!’ I never gave him the opportunity to come to me with his feelings. … Before football, he was alive. After, he’d walk around in a daze. I’d be like, ‘This is not the same guy I knew.’”

It was when he was trying to buy weed that Baskett claimed the incident with the transgender model occurred. “I put myself in a bad situation,” Baskett says, “whether I was battling depression or not.”

The pair documented their relationship struggles on the third season of the reality show Kendra on Top, as well as on Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars.

Hank Baskett and Kendra Wilkinson arrive at the WE TV celebration of the premieres of Kendra on Top and Driven to Love in March 2016. (Photo: Emma McIntyre/Getty Images)

2017

All is forgiven?

In March, the pair publicly celebrated the anniversary of when they first met with sweet Instagram posts. (Wilkinson’s has since been deleted.) “9 years ago I met the person who would take me all the way to the top and hold me there even during the weakest times. We met that day out on the golf course and knew he was mine,” she wrote alongside a photo of the two. “Even with little bumps in the road, nothing or nobody can be greater or make me feel more successful than [Hank]. Imperfection is where great change and growth happens with us. We are true best friends who f*** good, fight good, golf good, BBQ and drink beer good… Thank you for being there on the golf course that day and being that shy guy. Thank u for my happiness and our children… here’s to eternity.”

Baskett posted a similar photo — which has also been deleted — writing, “In life you’re told to go with your gut. Well, 9 years ago I did just that… Instead of just a day of golf I found a lifetime of love! Things happen for a reason and I’m eternally grateful they did that day! I love you bayba!!”

2018

While they looked like a happy family on social media, Wilkinson revealed things weren’t rosy behind closed doors. In February, she took to Instagram to address a tabloid report that claimed they were faking marriage problems for TV. The since-deleted post read:

“1. How do u fake marital problems? Makes absolutely no sense. 2. Yes we are having issues. 3. My job has been reality TV for 13 years 4. My show was a comedy and light hearted til sad times happened then we had to change my show from comedy to drama. Not what I wanted but was a part of my journey and story. 5. These issues Hank n I are having in our home which we are trying to hard to over come, everyone knows about, including producers and network, friends and family. 6. My job is reality TV and I love my job unfortunately these issues at home are affecting my decisions cuz the last thing I want to do is hurt Hank 7. I hope to get back to the fun Kendra you all know. That’s all I want n aim for. I hate drama!”

Kendra breaks down on Instagram. (Photo: Kendra Wilkinson via Instagram)

Things didn’t turn around in March when Wilkinson shared emotional Instagram Stories about her fragile state. Multiple reports soon surfaced that she was preparing to finally pull the plug on their nearly nine-year marriage.

“They’ve been having a really tough time especially over the last three to six months,” a source close to the Girls Next Door alum revealed to People. “She’s always been someone who wanted to be fully committed, married forever, and was definitely an ‘I’ll never get a divorce’ kind of girl, but she really lost trust in her marriage and she’s realized there’s no turning back.”

On April 6, Wilkinson confirmed their marriage was over, but that there is no ill will.

Today is the last day of my marriage to this beautiful man. I will forever love Hank and be open but for now we have chosen to go our own ways. I’m beyond sad and heartbroken because i did believe in forever, that’s why i said yes but unfortunately too much fear has gotten in the way. We are both amazing parents and our kids will be happy n never know the difference other than seeing mama smile. Sometimes love looks funny. We are told to make sacrifices in life if it’s true love well in this case it’s me. I want to see happy Hank again… i miss that. Marriage was just a piece of paper and a piece of jewelry but our hearts will always be real. U will prob see us together a lot but it’s because there’s no hate. Love wins in this case it’s just looks a little funny. Thank you Hank for a beautiful 8 years of marriage and 2 beautiful kids. I feel so thankful and blessed.

A post shared by Kendra Wilkinson Baskett (@kendra_wilkinson_baskett) on Apr 6, 2018 at 10:18am PDT

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Kendra Wilkinson confirms Hank Baskett split with emotional Instagram post

#news #splits #hank baskett #breakups #kendra wilkinson #_author:Taryn Ryder #_revsp:wp.yahoo.celebrity.us #couples #divorces #_lmsid:a0Vd000000AE7lXEAT #_uuid:4821bb17-1abf-3f99-91ec-97c028c121c8

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ralphmorgan-blog1 · 7 years

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30 Reasons To Leave Your Hometown Before You Turn 25

Hamza

Moving away from home in my early 20s has helped me become stronger, more aware, and most of all, more thankful. This article is intended to help illustrate how and why I think its a good idea to leave your hometown at a young age.

Ive made some pretty good decisions in my life. I can confidently admit that. Ive done a lot of things in my life that Im happy about. There are a lot of times I can reflect back on and genuinely be glad that I made a certain decision and it led me to where I am now.

For example, Im genuinely glad that I worked hard in school and that I was receptive to my parents when they were telling me education was important. Even though I didnt make straight As and often got into arguments with my parents about my grades (I thought a B was good enough), my good GPA allowed me to get into a good college and actually made me one of the first in my family to graduate with a four-year degree.

Along with that, Im happy about the college I chose and made the friends that I did. I dont know where I would be without a lot of the people in my life, and I owe a lot of that to my 4 years spent at Duquesne University.

However, up to this point, there is nothing I can be more thankful for than the fact that I moved 1,100 miles away right after college. This arguably has taught me more about life, myself, and others than anything else ever has. I wanted to share some of the things Ive learned along the way, which again is the intention of this article.

I am writing this with two people in mind.

Person 1

The person who is currently living in their hometown without a real reason to stay there. Maybe you have considered moving away from home before, but something keeps holding you back. Youre not sure what it is. Maybe its the fear of the unknown, maybe you dont want to be lonely, maybe youre trying to be smart with money (I get it), or maybe its just the simple fact that you like where you are and dont want to leave.

Person 2

The person who actually has moved from home, has had a great experience, and can relate to some of the incredible things that happen as a result of trying something new.

So, coming from somebody who was once Person 1 and now happily can consider himself in the Person 2 category, Ive come up with 30 reasons to illustrate why moving away from home was the best decision of my life to date.

(Disclaimer: Before 25 years old was not meant to be exact. This list is true for many other ages. The main overarching point is that moving somewhere new at a relatively young age is really helpful starting out.)

Here is the list, based on my personal experiences…

1. You will learn what it means to be truly independent.

You will learn what it takes to not rely on others for assistance with every little thing. Youll figure out what to do if your tire pops, when your air conditioner breaks, when you dont know what to cook for yourself without immediately relying on family and people you know. It feels good to figure things out on your own.

2. Conversations are easy and interesting.

People in your new city will find you interesting and ask about where youre from. Youll do the same for them and it will be fun to talk about similarities, differences, and past experiences.

3. You arent tied down with commitments.

If youre going to uproot your life and do something entirely different or risky, you might as well do it before having kids, a family, and multiple established reasons to stick around. When else will you get to do it?

4. You can start completely fresh.

If youre unhappy with your life at home, need a change, or made some mistakes, it can be hard to move forward. If you want to re-brand or re-invent yourself, moving away allows you to start over with a clean slate.

5. Drake was wrong new friends.

There is no such thing as not making new friends. Well there is, but its boring. There are plenty of ways to make new friends in a new city. After moving to Florida and seeing others do the same, I reflect back on how everybodys group of friends is now completely different from what it once was. And nobody has lost their original friends just gained new, great ones. Its always fun when your hometown friends come together with your new friends too, so it helps you look forward to those kinds of meetings as well. On top of that, I met a great girl who I likely wouldnt have met had I not come to Florida.

6. Networking opportunities effortlessly happen.

You will meet people that will change your life from a professional or personal standpoint. Ive met so many people in Florida that have helped me move up professionally as well as helped me develop spiritually. This will effortlessly happen when you move.

7. New skills that wouldnt happen otherwise.

Youll learn new skills by moving away from home. I got golf lessons in Florida, which is something I likely never would have done in my hometown. Also, I now know a ton about data analytics and all sorts of paid media, which may not have happened had I not made the leap.

8. You hear different perspectives.

Gaining new perspectives is a huge part of moving away from home. At home, you only know the perspective of people who had a very similar experience to yours. You all went to the same high school, knew the same people, went to the same places, and had the same favorite teams. You will meet people whose mindsets and backgrounds will inspire you and maybe even teach you something about yourself that you never unlocked before.

9. Different weather.

Moving from Pittsburgh to Tampa was shocking because I had never gotten so much Vitamin D in my life. Whether its moving from cloudy to sunny, rainy to dry, sunny to cold, you will find new weather which will lead to new things to do, and possibly even an appreciation for what you had experienced before.

10. Different things to do.

I used to always hang out with my same couple of friends, go to the same couple of bars, hang out at the same houses afterward, on the same days of the week, at the same times. And its always the same people at those bars, every time. I do such a variety of things now and its so much more interesting. Moving away from home may freak you out because your mind is trained that there are only a limited number of things to do. But when you leave, you realize that it is all dependent on your location, your friends, the weather, your job, and many other factors that will likely give you so many more options.

11. Your parents already did their part.

Not to be overly harsh, but if youre still living at your actual house, realize that your parents already did their job in raising you, and that you need to not only give yourself some freedom, but give them some as well. I understand easing into real life, but still living at home long after college is pretty drastic, even if it allows you to stack up money. Moving away from home will be good for you and your parents.

12. Learning to survive with insecurities.

There are times youll feel insecure. Walking into a social situation alone. Walking into a new job. Presenting at a business meeting to people older than you. Barely affording rent. Seeing people in better shape than you. But the beauty of it is that you learn to handle this and use it as motivation to get better. If you never experience being insecure and getting through it, youll have a harder time handling situations later in life.

13. Greater confidence.

From learning to deal with insecurities, you gain confidence. You start to realize after a while that youll get in a groove, start learning more, things will start clicking, and youll get better at things. You will have way more confidence knowing you made it there yourself. One day youll look around and realize wow, I have a nice place, a car I paid for by myself, and a whole group of friends in a new state. Its amazing to look back and realize how much youve grown.

14. You discover new interests.

You dont know what you dont know. Moving to a new place might introduce you to something you didnt know existed. I know people who have experienced moving away from home to different states and ended up going down paths they originally hadnt planned because they found something they were passionate about. Some are pursuing their dream jobs now. What is more fun than that?

15. You learn to trust yourself.

When youre in a new place, you often have no one else to rely on except yourself. Yes, there are people you can ask at work, you can phone a friend or family member at home, but sometimes you have to make big decisions on your own. One thing Ive learned is that I trust myself and my gut decisions more. That gut feeling is something I have a lot more faith in now and I usually know that the decision Im making will make sense.

16. Growing closer to your family.

I appreciate my family so much more when I look at my situation now and realize that I wouldnt have gotten here without them. They instilled me with a mindset that made me confident enough to move 1,100 miles away at age 22. They provided me with enough support to get me started. They helped get me through college. When you realize these things, and you dont see them as often, you make it a point to call them, see them, and get closer to them. It just happens.

17. Youll view your hometown more positively.

Sometimes I go over a year without going back home. But when I do go back home, I really appreciate the little things I thought were awful and boring before. For example, Florida (although beautiful) is very flat, and there are just palm trees and similar views everywhere. Now I go home and I really appreciate the basic things like the hills and different views I dont get here. My girlfriend, who grew up in Florida, has encouraged me to appreciate landscapes and views other than palm trees. When she came back to Pennsylvania with me for the first time, I was shocked as to why she thought it was all so beautiful, but now I understand. Its also nice to keep close with hometown friends and of course, family.

18. More career opportunities.

There are only so many jobs within reasonable traveling distance from you. Lets say you have a marketing degree and you live in a suburb of Pittsburgh, PA. There may be 300 jobs available, with 45 of them being in your experience range, with the maximum salary being $45K for the ones you qualify for. You could move to a different city and there could be 800 jobs available, with 160 of them in your experience range, with the maximum pay being $70K for one you could actually get. You could just be missing out on potentially great career opportunities and more money just because of your location and unwillingness to leave.

19. You reflect more.

Moving away from home teaches you to reflect and be alone with your thoughts, in a positive way. When youre in your hometown and youre constantly surrounded by people you grew up with and family members, you may not get a lot of time alone. Especially at home when your parents are asking you questions left and right. When you move away, you can get a one bedroom place and literally be alone for an entire day if you choose to be. With distractions being everywhere these days, it can be comforting and helpful to just get away and reflect.

20. You learn to manage money.

You have to. Ive lived in one bedroom apartments most of my time in Tampa and believe me it gets expensive. New situations means more things you want to do/try, which means more spending. Not to mention Im a caffeine freak (but trying to get better) so I spend at least $3 per day. Anyway, you learn to manage your money. You even learn how to get in a little bit of debt then get out of it which is always fun.

21. You experience the feeling of accomplishment.

This is similar to number 13 (gaining confidence), but with a heavy focus on reflection. It is so nice to look back on your situation, where you came from, and realize how far youve gotten. After 4 years I finally feel established in a new city/state and it is an overwhelming feeling of accomplishment and thankfulness. You will also get new jobs, reach new milestones, and achieve different things.

22. Phones exist.

You can easily call people, see what people are up to on social media, and text. Snapchat is basically real-time. You literally can be 1,100 miles away and know exactly what happened all weekend in your hometown. More often than not, your weekend ends up being more interesting.

23. Traveling exists.

When you move, if you really miss home that bad, or youre just going through a time where you are extra lonely for whatever reason, you can travel. Its never impossible to see people after moving away from home. Depending on where you move to, long weekends can even make sense. Its important to make the most of a long weekend every once in a while. I know people in Florida who travel home for almost every long weekend when theres a holiday on a Monday or Friday.

24. Holidays become more exciting.

Naturally, as you get older, holidays just arent the same as they were when you were younger. However, when you move away to a different city or state, they do get a lot more exciting when you finally get the chance to come home. Holidays such as Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter become times you look forward to more than ever before. They become reunions. They become so much more special because you havent seen people in so long. Similar to number 2 above, you have so much more to talk abut when you do go home.

25. You will inspire others.

One thing Ive found to be rewarding is that other people get inspired by your own experiences. Ive had friends move to Florida because of a visit with me. My brother saw me succeeding by moving away from home and ended up doing the same. I talk to people at home who say theyd love to try something new. Its good to set an example and inspire others.

26. You have the ultimate freedom.

I dont want to get this one confused with having personal independence. What I mean here is that you can make literally whatever decision you want. You can buy a car. You can get a dog. You can pursue a different field of work. You can make huge life decisions without dealing with the pressure of people around you. While typing this, I realized that a dog and a car were my two biggest purchases to date and Ive told my parents after the fact in both cases.

27. You can make huge mistakes.

Along with number 26, you can make massive mistakes and mess up your life temporarily. You can handle getting fired from a job, you can ruin a friendship, you can make a mistake in a social situation, or you can wreck your car. Making huge mistakes is fine because they will always work out and youll come out stronger on the other side. Moving away from home and having the ultimate freedom allows you to make bigger mistakes that allow you to learn bigger and more important lessons.

28. Feel comfortable making drastic changes.

You can shave your head. You can grow a long beard. You can start dressing a little differently. You can paint stripes on your car, or buy a car in a bright flashy color. You can start rooting for Florida State football (youre welcome Kelly). The point is moving from home allows you to feel comfortable reinventing yourself and just trying things out for fun. You may not even do anything drastic, but there is something cool about knowing you can, and you can feel comfortable. When less people know you, this is easier to do without feeling too weird.

29. Your comfort zone will limit you.

Comfort zones are nice to an extent, but they are restricting. If you train yourself to be too comfortable in your 20s, you may try to be too comfortable in your 30s. You might always lean towards whats easier for your entire life. The same way you make coffee or go for a run to set the tone early in the morning, set the tone early in your life by trying something new when youre young and hungry. That pattern just might follow you for your whole life.

30. Your faith will grow.

Ive naturally had faith in higher powers just from being raised in the church and reading the Bible. However, until you actually experience it in a real life way, you have no idea how much your faith can grow. After moving away, I had to figure a lot of things out, and HAD to have faith. Faith grows when you go through difficult experiences that challenge you. All in all, I would consider myself a work in progress from a spiritual standpoint, but after moving away I am exponentially more aware and more appreciative of Gods workings in my life.

30 things? Thats it?

I could keep going Im sure, but Im sure a small percentage of you even made it this far down the page. If you have, and youre somebody who is debating moving away from home for the first time, I hope this has helped you understand from an insider perspective that there are some great things in store for you if you take the leap.

For people who have already made a move, I hope you were able to relate to some of these points and I hope your experience has been as rewarding as mine. Feel free to comment with which ones in my list of 30 resonate the most with you, or if you have any others you would add about moving away from home.

If you dont fit into either one of these categories, maybe you know somebody who is struggling with the idea of moving away from home, or somebody who has done it recently and is having issues. Feel free to share this with them too!