#fear of being abusive isn't the same as taking pratical steps to ensure you don't repeat that cycle and hurt others.
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not putting the reblog banner on this one bc it would feel disrespectful. anyway big fucking mood, felt in my soul. trying SO HARD not to think abt the drama rn.
#tommy's og art wow#tommy's OG ART wow#my hot take is that the VICTIM deserves support and is 100% valid. that was abusive. but that being said#this doesn't make THE GUY (iykyk) irredeemable forever because people can change; but- THE VICTIM still deserves#support and her experiences were absolutely horrible. no one deserves to be treated like that. my only hope is that 1) she heals#and 2) that THE GUY learns to have healthy relationships and not abuse others- finding other ways to deal with his mental illness.#he's been open about being toxic for awhile now; self awareness IS the first step to change but he seems to be resigned to it#but this behavior ISN'T inevitable. his mental illnesses absolutely make him prone to this#but healing- and becoming someone who wouldn't do this- isn't impossible. it'll always be something he can reach one day if he really tries#but clearly he's not there yet and shouldn't be like...in relationships (/r or /p) until he figures this out. and he needs to figure it out#THE VICTIM has all my love in the world. may she have happiness and healing in the future. this was like rlly awful#and to anyone who struggles with behaviors like that- you still matter and you won't be like this forever. but being afraid isn't enough#fear of being abusive isn't the same as taking pratical steps to ensure you don't repeat that cycle and hurt others.#recognition is the first step#but you have to brainstorm what you can do. how you can practice. how you can get better. and i believe you can. i believe anyone can.#lets hope my tags dont get cut off lol#anyway. yeah
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