#ff7 my beloved. no one will get this joke except for me

[greghatecrimes]

note to self: sit down and finish answering yer goddamn ASKS tomorrow

exact same tone as:

[echodrops]

Voltron or Final Fantasy 7?

In my last Voltron post I mentioned that Voltron Legendary Defender is really just Final Fantasy 7 with robot lions, so I wanted to elaborate on some of the comparisons.

Obviously this is mostly facetious; there are still several note-worthy differences between the two series, and if you want to get technical, Voltron certainly existed before Final Fantasy 7. However, it’s pretty obvious that someone on the writing team for Voltron Legendary Defender has been influenced by the plot and characters of Final Fantasy 7.

I mean...

We start out our story with the world in the clutches of an evil dictator, who by all rights, has no logical claim to the parts of the universe he controls, except that he has consolidated access to a seemingly unlimited supply of energy, which gives him military and utilitarian power over the hapless masses. (Also, bonus for their outfit color schemes matching almost exactly.)

The energy that these two scumbags are powering their military forces with is not just any energy, no sir: it’s actually the lifeblood of planets, the force that keeps worlds and everything on them alive.

In one of the most blatant cinematic parallels of all time, they forcefully draw out and refine this energy, using it for various purposes from powering their cities, building massive weapons, to creating armies of typically monstrous super soldiers, usually hopped up hard on the energy drug.

Meanwhile, our evil dictators rule from the thrones of their conspicuously ring-shaped dark fortresses that continue to slowly drain the life and peace from everything in reach.

But everyone knows that any villain worth his salt is backed up by an even more morally bankrupt and terrifying Mad Scientist:

Whose preoccupation with a calamity from another world

and penchant for creating horrific chimeras of flesh and machine

is about to cause everyone to have a very, very, bad day. Now where else have we seen pink glowing eyes, hm...

Of course, evil never reigns without opposition, so we have to have the consistently-out-of-focus-for-the-rest-of-the-series band of well-intentioned extremist rebels:

Although they talk a big game, their biggest accomplishment seems to mostly be getting themselves blown up.

They certainly aren’t responsible for killing their respective evil dictators, for example. Nope, that honor goes to:

The mysterious light-haired pretty boy with weird bangs, cat eyes, a sword, and a big ass chip on his shoulder over his parentage. He seems calm and rational, even sophisticated and princely--but it’s a thin veneer hiding a life-time of trauma and horror, and one wrong reveal about the identity of his mother could tip him over the edge into no-holds-barred madness. A dangerous free agent whose loyalties are questionable and whose existence is inextricably tied to the calamity from another world. He thinks He is among the last of the ancient mystical race of Cetra Alteans, who were eradicated by the creature from the other world, who infiltrated their society by possessing some of their closest allies.

Lotor also has shades of Rufus Shinra: seizes command after his father’s death, possibly still evil but everyone loves him anyway, commands a Quirky Mini Boss Squad:

Featuring in order: the One Who Rushes Into Everything, the Most Competent Right-Hand, the Quiet One, and the Plucky Redhead.

Of course, when the world needs saving from certain doom, a most beloved band of bizarre heroes will arise to answer destiny’s call:

The Stringy Inherited-Sword-Wielding Hero With Wack Hair

It’s a running gag to refer to him as a lone wolf and disinterested in other people, but under his prickly facade is a much softer, confused boy who is struggling hard with identity issues. He’s forced into a leadership role for which he is particularly ill-suited, and even though most people will leave the game/the show with the impression that he really grew into his leadership, the sum total of his accomplishments is actually causing far more trouble than would have occurred if he had just stayed home.

His obsession with finding and defeating light-haired pretty boy causes everyone no small amount of grief and then he ends up siding with said light-haired pretty boy anyway...

Can’t overcome the fact that he is deeply connected to the very thing he must defeat; he has Jenova Galra genes that lead him to question his role in the universe and whether or not he is a monster.

Incurably socially awkward country boy. Let’s mosey!

He learned everything he knows from:

The Black-Haired Best Friend with a Scar on His Face

Older, wiser, and in every way more competent than the stringy hero, this guy, complete with noticeable black and purple color scheme, is REAL hero material. He’s been through it all: held captive for year(s) by the mad scientist, “upgraded” and experimented upon with intentions of creating a true Super Soldier, something-something clones everywhere something-something... He has the good attitude and the powerful loyalty necessary to be a shining example of a white knight for the princess and is the standard which stringy hero knows he will never exceed. Stringy hero looks up to this guy more than anyone in the entire world, and this guy would give it all--even his life--to protect the people who mean the most to him. Complete with dramatic mid-series meaningful haircut!

Despite being a fan favorite, the creators spend more time writing this guy out of the series than they do actually using him to his best potential...

Shiro also has some shades of Vincent Valentine: atoner who fears he has become a monstrous tool for the enemy, despite his deep-down incredibly good heart. Some people like to pair him with the Genki Girl.

Mostly seen in the company of:

Princess Last of Her Kind

Don’t let her soft looks and pink color motif fool you! The “princess” is a strong, independent girl who does what she wants, when she wants, up to and including sacrificing herself to save the day when all the other heroes fail at life. As the last of her mystical and mysterious race, she possesses strange magics that allow her to feel the life force of all living beings and tap into the very energy that Shinra the Galra Empire are harvesting. Capable of wielding a staff, her actual greatest strength is her healing magic, which has the power to bring an entire planet back from the brink of death.

Her people were destroyed from within by betrayal at the hands of the calamity, and their sole remaining Plot MacGuffin, the white materia Voltron is the only thing left that can save the world. Despite being technologically advanced beyond all reason, her people were ancient peacekeepers who still, inexplicably, built stone temples.

The Promised Land Oriande is not a faerie tale.

Strongly flower-themed:

Then we have:

The Brilliant Young Rascal

As a character, Pidge isn’t actually a one-for-one to anyone in FF7. Yuffie’s acrobatic stunts and mischievous Genki Girl personality embody one obvious part of Pidge, but Yuffie lacks Pidge’s tech-ish brilliance and competent follow-through. In that regard, Pidge is actually somewhat closer to Red XIII: smart, inquisitive, and usually mature, their deep inner-conflicts, especially regarding the fate of their fathers, reveal their weaknesses and the truth that they’re still young, uncertain people who fear for the future of their world and sometimes feel helpless in the face of the staggering tasks put before them. They are deeply attuned to nature but also raised by someone whose technology is capable of revealing incredible truths about the universe. Both of them are also fish out of water when it comes to befriending new people, and they often feel like they do better on their own than trying to rely on people who aren’t part of their trusted family.

Courage the Cowardly Cat

Although it’s certainly tempting to compare Hunk to Barret, based somewhat on appearance and even, to a certain extent, on personality--Barret is a huge softy underneath who just loves his family and wants to do right in the world--Hunk has much more in common with Cait Sith, the robotic cat/moogle combo who is secretly an alter ego for the brilliant architect Reeve Tuesti. Cowardly and often the butt of jokes from teammates and enemies alike, Cait Sith is frequently underestimated and flies under the radar, allowing him to keep his own secrets even while sticking his nose in just about everyone else’s business. Although he’s not initially sold on the heroes’ goal of saving the world, he soon has a change of heart that makes him into a fast and loyal ally. Despite the fact that he’s made of “fluff,” in the hour of greatest need, it’s Cait Sith who steps up to rescue everyone, essentially single-handedly saving the world.

His creator is an incredible and genius engineer who longs to use his creations to better the lives of common people, but he’s also sarcastic and unafraid to tell it like it is, even if that means he’s telling his own allies where they’ve messed up badly.

His predictions about the future always seem to come true...

The Emotional Backbone of the Party

Don’t get me wrong, both Lance and Tifa are formidable fighters on their own, whose talents shine in different areas of combat than the traditional sword-wielding heroes. But their greatest strengths actually seem to lie in their ability to support their allies. When stringy hero falls into despair and falters in his leadership, it’s this right-hand role who steps up to bear the weight and get the party back on track. The voice of reason and drive, Lance and Tifa are go-getters who won’t let anyone settle for giving less than their best, and they definitely aren’t willing to sit around listening to tired old excuses when they could be out saving the world. Razzle Dazzle time!

They are both influenced strongly by their families and tend to listen to the feelings and struggles of others much more than they are willing to share their own feelings and fears. The others come to rely on them as an emotional crutch, whose central job it is to reassure, validate, and empower the team, sometimes at the cost of their own happiness.

But they weren’t always this way, and in fact, in the past, they happened to be a bit shallow and excitable, with a penchant for throwing themselves into situations which were way, way too far out their league and for rarely, if ever, listening to good advice. Head-strong and romantic, they started out as dreamers before the war took its toll.

They definitely had a rocky beginning with their stringy hero--they were not friends--but, by the middle end of the series, have grown and matured as characters into a strong person who not only helps guide the hero but also holds up better in the face of all the trauma and suffering the party experienced.

Even being such a central character, they get a bare minimum amount of dialogue, leading many fans to interpret the character however they see fit, causing both Lance and Tifa to become common stand-ins for the fans themselves.

(Despite both losing their place as the “heart of the party” to the “Princess,” they never become jealous of her.)

And finally:

Coranic The Mechanic

Coran and Cid Highwind don’t have that much in common in terms of personality, except both being extreme dorks with notable accents, but I wonder how much of that is because Voltron is a kids’ show and Cid’s chain-smoking, curse-laden, women-abusing attitude just wouldn’t fly in a place like that. In terms of story role, they fill the exact same niche: the older male mechanic who advises and leads when needed to, despite his advice often seeming eccentric at best to those he’s trying to lead. He’s in charge of flying the ship while the others race off into danger, and if you lay one dirty finger on his baby, he will probably throw you overboard.

Tough as nails, despite all appearances, but also tried, true, and loyal to a fault. Won’t give up, even in the face of insurmountable danger, and gets a big kick out of killing bad guys. Impeccable timing for dramatic last second saves.

PHEW, got ‘em all!

In case you need anything else to convince you that you’re watching an at least partially repackaged story, don’t forget the:

Bizarre Egyptian-themed ancient stone temple where the mystical race of the Cetra Alteans kept the deepest secrets of their magic.

Really unlucky magic rock from space.

Gigantic killer robot beasts.

An overly-drawn-out and somewhat poorly explained clone plot line that just leaves the fans even more confused.

And OF COURSE:  infamously long unskippable summoning sequences.

tl;dr:

If you’re in the game of predicting where Voltron’s future plot might go, you would not be misguided to go play FF7 as fuel for your predictions. And if you’re a Voltron fan who still hasn’t played FF7... What are you even doing with your life? Get out of here!

[zachsgamejournal]

PLAYING: Final Fantasy VII Remake

Previously, I kinda laughed at how much the game stretched certain sections that were quite short in the original. I was not prepared for how much they stretched the space between Bombing Mission 1 and Bombing Mission 2. Still, despite a few awkward "performances", I'm having a great time taking a deeper look at Midgar and FFVII's beloved characters!

So I’m on the train. Cloud brings up the inviso-cloaks and everyone is perplexed. Careful Cloud...you don’t know these people. The changes to the train's story beats are a little awkward. Barret gives an impassioned speech about Shinra killing the planet to a group of mid-management Shinra Employees. This is more the speech I was expecting back at the reactor--so I can appreciate that the stakes have been communicated. But this scene also points out my disconnect with Japanese storytelling. I’m not sure if it’s meant to be a joke, but the mid-managers are calling Avalanche (our heroes) “terrorists”. Then Barret confronts them, “They’re not terrorists!” screams the 8 foot tall, hulking mass of a man with 14 inch barrelled gaitingun for an arm. Shouldn’t he try to conceal that? The mid-managers comically tremble as they debate with Barret. Maybe this is culturally how the Japanese handle confrontation?? Then we get to a few missteps, to me. Jessie shows Cloud the city map, as in the original. But she doesn’t explain that they’re going under the city. And then there’s no wide shot showing the train descending into the slums. So I don’t feel like they’re really communicating this concept well. After, Cloud makes his thoughtful statement about the poor not being able to leave in the same way that the train they’re on can’t leave it’s tracks. Pretty sure in the original Barret makes a statement about not expecting to hear something like that from Cloud. It’s a small moment the two share that’s not present in the remake. ...Wait, that may have been a different moment... Back in the Slums and the developers captured have done a great job with the train station! Avalanche begins to brag in public about their success--which I was like, “Whoa, just tell everybody?!” But Barret shushes them. Now we start getting into real changes, but first: Holy Shit The SLUMS! For a place built out of trash, they did an amazing job with the Slums. The upper plates of Midgar and pillars that hold them up are ever present, both beautiful and oppressive. I found myself staring upward quite often. They also did a great job making the Slums feel like a lived-in community, with shops, children, and stray animals all over the place. This part of the original game is fairly short but slowly paced. We meet Tifa. She and Cloud reflect on an old promise from their childhood. Barret reveals he has a daughter. Also, the group doesn’t quite have the cash to pay Cloud. Cloud is about to walk out on the group when Tifa uses their childhood promises to rope him into the next mission, which starts after a night’s rest. All of this is within 15 minutes. But Remake: 4 hours later… I’m not sure how much time I spent in this extended part of the game, but I wasn’t rushing. They’ve made some good decisions here. Instead of Tifa and Cloud immediately bonding and putting “everything” on the table within a short period, Tifa and Cloud cooperate on a series of tasks to help Cloud get his due payment. Tifa also offers help and advice to get Cloud more renown within the Slums so that he can continue finding work as a mercenary. I really enjoyed this, because it gives purpose for Cloud being here. He didn’t just happen upon Tifa and join Avalanche with no plan--he’s actually trying to make a home and start a business. It makes Cloud a little more real. It also gives Tifa and Cloud a chance to hang out and reconnect. There’s an interesting moment where Cloud offers to assassinate a few characters, but Tifa doesn’t allow it. She mentions how frightening and different Cloud has become. It’s an interesting moment. Also, when I hit Shinra soldiers with my 300 pound sword over and over, are they just getting knocked out? But most excitingly--this section allowed for side quests. I think there were about 6+ side missions to do. They were simple go here and beat shit up (except for one lost cat hunt). Still, it gave tiny glimpses into the world of the Slums, and this is exactly what I was hoping for: a deeper dive into the city of Midgar. This also introduced how weapon upgrades work. I thought this was gonna be in lieu of collecting weapons since Cloud basically uses the Buster Sword for the entirety of the original game’s Midgar section. But then they immediately gave me a new sword. Also, it’s interesting how this section takes place in the day. While the upper plate still blocks out the sun for the most part, there’s still streaks of light through large openings, and the indirect light coming from the edges of the city. After this, I went to the bar where Tifa did an awkward dance to make Cloud a drink. Speaking of: Awkward Tifa Moments: I like the voice actor for Tifa. She has an interesting texture to her voice that gives some extra character to the performance. But the silly animations they give her...I guess it’s a Japanese thing, I see it in Anime quite a bit, but I can’t connect with it. It’s such a distraction to the performances. Why are people posing?? It made sense in older games when you had make what were basically Lego People communicate a wide range of emotion. But with modern tech, you can tell so much of the story with subtle expressions and movements. It just feels excessive to me. Also, Tifa has huge breasts. That’s just part of FF7. Not trying to body shame, but it seems the camera angle choices are constantly trying to focus on her boobs. Not sure if this is intentional, but her character design is already so sexualized, I don’t see the point in over-emphasizing it by looking directly at her breasts. But maybe that’s not what the camera is focusing on and I’ve just outed myself as a pig. Besides that, it’s been interesting to get to know Tifa in a way the original didn’t allow.

Back in the bar, I’m expected to wait for an Avalanche meeting to end. I started playing the darts minigame. I had planned to go to bed, but each time I played I got a little bit better. Pretty soon, I was nearing Wedge’s high score. After I finally tied him, I knew I could beat him. And I wanted to know what happens when I beat that score!! 40 minutes later, I finally get to 0 in 7 darts. I get a PS trophy. That’s it. I’m not disappointed...but I expected Wedge to come out, bug-eyed, or something. Ah well.

The meeting ends and Barret says he doesn’t need Cloud, so I’m asked to leave. There’s also a weird statement from Cloud suggesting that Tifa either was kicked out or not allowed in Avalanche. I don’t get it...I’m really not sure what Tifa’s role is. In the original game, I think they delayed giving you Tifa for gameplay reasons, but maybe this game is suggesting that Tifa isn’t quite committed to the cause??

I had a lot of fun getting to know the Slums and doing side-quests. I look forward to more diversions as the game progresses. I’ve played this section so much on PS1 that I don’t feel compelled to rush it!