#first of all a thousand props to Emily who did not break character for a second when Bastian found his wife murdered

[pyrrhiccomedy]

THE WHITE DOOR

He never called her “the woman he loved” until she was dead in his arms. 

Her killer was a a man whom Bastian admired; but Bastian wronged him anyway, and he was savage and exacting in his vengeance. So: Bastian too is savage and exacting, and far less admirable. 

Though revenge provided no abatement of his grief, it was required by the circumstances.

It is not enough by far.

He readies his companions to set out for the continent of Death itself. He knows only one man who has been there, and that man returned blinded, bitter, and heartbroken: but the dark prince loves his wife, and a knife will not keep him from her. Nor will the endless miles of the white countries, nor the threat of mutilation, nor the will of any God.

He expects horror. He will bring it himself.

His wise wife, his fairy wife: he trusts she knows that he is coming.

[gleereviewpodcast]

Marie’s Lists

So I needed to leave the Rachel podcast early, and therefore I didn’t get to give you guys my lists! Therefore, I’m going to post them here for anyone interested. Under the cut. 

What are your 15 (Ranked or Unranked) Worse Songs ?

All of mine are unranked BTW

Smile (the Lily Allen one): I felt like Lea was putting on a weird accent during this one. Maybe it was just the production? Regardless, this was a weird one to me.

Next to Me: We’ve covered it before, but this song was absolutely wrong for Lea’s voice. And Idina’s. It hurts me to say, but true. Should’ve been a Naya/Amber duet. 

A Change Would Do You Good: Ok, first of all, I’m just not a fan of the song. Second, even though I’m not nearly anti-Brody’s voice as Emily, it is pretty clear on this one that he’s not nearly as good as Lea. Not her fault, but still don’t like it.

All That Jazz: Glee can’t do Chicago justice. Watch the movie, people, and you will feel my pain.

A Thousand Miles: Samchel must die. 

Time After Time: STOP RUINING SONGS I LIKE SAMCHEL!

The Way You Look Tonight/You’re Never Fully Dressed Without a Smile: The Way You Look Tonight is a genuinely fantastic standard Frank Sinatra song I adore. If I ever get married, you can bet it’ll be at my wedding. This mash-up RUINED the song for me. I’m not a huge Annie fan, but it ruined this song too. If they had just picked one, I would’ve been good with it. 

Firework: Lea Michele is too good to sing Katy Perry.

Big Girls Don’t Cry: I have never liked this song. I think she sounded better on it than Kurt or Blaine, but this song must die. It’s so annoying.

My Man: Sorry Emily and David. I snooze through it.

Who Are You Now: Why the everloving fuck is Sue singing on this?

Break Free: You guys know, Arianna Grande annoys the crap out of me. And I don’t think this is Lea’s style. 

I’ll Never Fall in Love Again: Yup, the other Samchel song, is also awful.

Barracuda: We all agree on this one. I actually like the original, but whereas they can sometimes give Lea rock songs and I end up loving them (see Creep), this one did not work for me at all. Maybe if they were more creative with the arangement, I could’ve dug it, but this was a miss for me.

I’m the Greatest Star: I just hate this song. 

Which is the worst of them? If we’re talking Lea on it, for me it’s Next to Me. If we’re talking in general, A Thousand Miles. If I could get a Lea only version of it though, that would’ve been ok. I think a lot of my hate is also thinking of the plot around it which makes me want to gag and vomit and die. 

What are your 15 (Ranked or Unranked) Best Songs ?

Don’t Rain On My Parade:  This was Rachel’s hail-Mary moment and if Make You Feel My Love didn’t exist, this would be my favorite Rachel solo. She comes out there with great power in her voice, and makes this song her bitch. I love it. 

O Holy Night: Ok, as much as I hate her winning Winter Showcase with no competition, I have to admit, this is gorgeous. And I hate Christmas music, and the religious songs especially normally do nothing for me. In terms of showing off her vocal power, this song is one of the best for showing it. Claps for this one.

Make You Feel My Love: I sob and cry every time I hear it. It’s another one where she just sounds lovely. 

I Feel Pretty/Unpretty: I basically get a vocal orgasm when I hear them sing on this together. It’s beautiful. I still listen to this one a lot. 

This Time: The only song in Dreams Come True I liked! It’s a little cheesey, but as far as original songs go, it’s one of the few that’s pretty good. And I just think Lea sounded good on it, and as a song, it was a good one to wrap up Rachel. 

Rolling in the Deep: the arrangement and her singing with Jon Groff does things to me. 

Mama Mia: Is this an odd choice? Maybe. But if I don’t dance and sing to it loudly (let’s be real I shout to it) I’ll be damned. 

Poker Face: Because I’m a sucker for different arrangements and Idina Menzel.

Listen to Your Heart: Ok, my embarrassing backstory for this song. When I was a young high schooler, I lacked gaydar. I had a crush on a guy who was so gay. He did come out to me as bisexual, and he had a boyfriend, but I had deluded myself into thinking he’d dump his BF and fall in love with me. I’d cry to this song about how i should tell him my feelings (I did eventually and it was awkward as hell). So I like the song in general for that reason. As far as in the show, it reminds me of the giddiness I felt when she got a relationship that didn’t suck.

Hello 12, Hello 13, Hello Love: Gah, more Jon/Leagasming.

The Rose: I actually found this song beautiful. It will show up later in a bad way, but here, it’s in a good way. I think the reason it shows up later in a bad way is because it made me sad because I felt like it would’ve been a good song about her relationship with Finn and it was a shitty audition number.

Defying Gravity: Wicked is magical. 

To Love You More: So I know Emily isn’t a fan. I think it sounds pretty.

Brave: This is mostly because I needed a Pezberry number. Gosh, they sound sexy together. 

Faithfully: Now it’s sad. 

Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart: I just love the original and it’s cute. 

Yesterday: It’s a different arrangement I love. And it makes me sad too. And Yesterday is one of my favorite Beatles’s songs of all time.

What are your 5 (Ranked or Unranked) Worse Performances ?

My Man (Plus every time she’s boring on a stage): This is more of a type of song that she did. . .a lot. She would sing emotionally on a stage, maybe making some faces, but otherwise just walking around and being boring. I obviously don’t expect crazy dancing during this, but just something not boring.

A Thousand Miles: It looked tacky and green screened. It also was my worst nightmare in that it lead to one of the most utterly disgusting moments Glee has ever given me of Sam and Rachel kissing. Ugh.  

The Rose: This is actually a fantastic song, and I recommend you guys looking up the lyrics if you haven’t. This could’ve been an incredibly meaningful song for Rachel. INSTEAD, it was her auditioning for the stupid TV show (ugh) in a goofy way. Ugh.

I’m the Greatest Star: It felt underwhelming after all the build-up to Rachel on Broadway. Also, again, I’m spoiled by Tatiana Maslany. It felt like Lea being over-the-top instead of Rachel playing a character.

It’s All Coming Back to Me: 100% context on this one. Rachel shouldn’t have gotten into NYADA because of this.

What are your 5 (Ranked or Unranked) Best Performances ?

Make you feel my love: Self-explanitory

DROMP: Lea Michele commanded that stage.

Hello 12: The Jon/Lea chemistry was amazing.

Don’t You Want Me Baby: She’s wearing an absurd outfit and drunk and flirting with Blaine. It’s great.

Run Joey Run: This was just hilarious.

Worst 5 Episodes of the series ?

Props: I don’t think I need to go into this one.

Untitled Rachel Berry Project: At this point, we’re meant to be happy she goes to this awful TV show. Nope.

Frenemies: You guys know how I feel about her towards Santana here

Back-Up Plan: My dreams came true! Now I don’t care about it, one month later! Let me abandon everything, right now.

Trio: Just more of the awfulness with her and Santana. And I felt bad for Kurt and Elliot for getting dragged into it all.

Best 5 Episodes of the series ?

Quarterback: Not going to lie, this is all Lea for me. I cry.

Loser Like Me: This was basically Rachel’s redemption for me.

The Break-Up: Her break-up scene with Finn still stands out to me as one of Lea’s better dramatic acting scenes.

Pilot: This was a great set-up, for what should’ve been dealt with more in the show, about her insecurities.

Theatricality: She handles the Shelby stuff very maturely, and I do feel bad for her in this one.