#for the record you can be autistic and also be extremely empathetic!

[triptychofvoids]

Your comic abt the empathy test made me wanna take the test myself and I also scored under 30....the autism won this battle

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not wanting to hang out with my autistic brother?

For context, I (Minor) am also autistic and have EXTREME sensory issues and am very empathetic. My brother (20M) is non-verbal, has very loud stims, and has meltdowns. Not very frequently, but a year or two ago he had them at least once every few months.

Also another note, he is incapable of living by himself and will never move out of our parents house. He is almost in every way dependent on our parents.

AKA I am a lot more “””””high-functioning””””” than him. I hate that term but we are on almost totally different sides of the spectrum basically.

BTW when I say I don’t want to hang out with him, I’m not saying I whine and complain about it to everyone in the general vicinity. ((I have never told anybody about this and keep it to myself.)) But instead I mean that what happens is that I either try to do my best to ignore him or I quietly leave the room.

The first and main reason why I don’t want to hang out with him is that he has extremely loud stims that do not go well with my sensory issues at ALL. He makes loud vocal stims and runs or walks around the area. He usually does this outside or in his room (because he likes to be alone), but whenever he’s in the main room of our house he’ll do it then too.

And our main room is almost always very loud already, which is unavoidable considering 4-6 of us are in the house at a time, plus the house is echoey. (I could be in my room with a closed door and fan all the way on and could still hear people in the main room)

I have already tried to combat this problem with wearing ear plugs, but it just doesn’t work out. 

I don’t want him to stop stimming, I just cannot deal with the loudness. Whenever he is downstairs I usually go back to my room, turn my fan on all the way, and listen to music to avoid it.

The second reason is that when he has meltdowns, he’s even louder (screams/yells) and is “”aggressive”” (he doesn’t have any bad intent he just runs, flips our parents off, punch, kick, etc) usually our parents are able to control the situation, but there have been times in the past where he has harmed me during these meltdowns. I don’t hate him for it at all. But it has installed a fear in me about being around him during/after his meltdowns. 

And for the record, he isn’t a small guy. He’s 6’ft, and at least 40 pounds heavier than me. I am 5’7ft and barely 100 pounds.

And even if this part wasn’t true I still get VERY stressed by his stims + emotions.

I don’t hate him or want him to stop stimming, I just cannot hang out in the same room with him without having sensory overload, being stressed, or sometimes being scared.

I’m probably leaving out some details but. AITA for not wanting to hang out with my autistic brother?

(could you tag this as 1️⃣ so i can find it easier, please?)

What are these acronyms?

[obsoleteozymandias]

Hi! I saw your requests are open so I was wondering if I could get a matchup for Resident Evil, any character if fine with me. Sorry if mines a bit long. Feel free to detail or take your time with it.

Nonbinary, She/They, Bi-oriented demi romantic gray ace

INFP 4w5

In short: A shy, informed of being too empathic, depressed, and autistic college student, studying at the moment radiology, but works as a freelance journalist and occasional host on different podcasts with a focus on bettering society through education. Has a record for chronically getting in over their head, but has emerged a jack of many trades due to that. Comically experienced best example was when I got onto a podcast hosted by experts in a bunch of fields and I just graduated hs but was able to discuss topics ranging from development of ai to causes of cultural polarization, with me and the psychologist bouncing off each other in discussion quite a bit, for a couple hours with them.

Personality: Quiet and shy, only really opening up as I work, see someone needing help, or notice a common interest. I have been called mom by many people due to how deep running my older sibling instincts are. I have a mask of confidence due to often working with people years older to hide a fear of rejection. My work as a journalist has led me to see some of the worst in people, so I can come off a bit tired but I try to use my experiences to help others. I tend to speak with a large degree of candor and I’ll spring off whenever I hear someone say to make a joke or affectionately poke fun at something. I’m also known as the cockroach because of my sheer tenacity to survive situations that would bring a lot of people down. While I don’t seem like the sort to take charge, I will if I see things go downhill with efficiency to make sure everything that needs to be done gets done.

Appearance: 5 foot 6 inches and gonna say this since I saw you know TWST is the fact I basically look like a shorter Malleus with brown eyes and glasses like Azul. I tend to dress in sweater vests, waistcoats, and button ups but I do love my leather jacket. Some days, I’ll look more feminine other days I’ll wear my binder. Additionally, I also sometimes wear a brace on my elbow due to an injury I got due to the amount of desk work I do.

Likes: Coffee, having time for a nap, going down random rabbit holes of research, media analysis, writing, working on my novel, making different drinks and food, punk, and rock.

Dislikes: Bigots, loud crowds, unrealistic expectations, conformity, people that have a simmering anger, and environments that leave people on the edge.

Me in a relationship: Very much more of an unspoken affection sort of person, I’ll make small changes to things or add steps in my daily routine to help my partner. I also am a bit cuddly, though only after people gain my trust, as I’m a tad touch starved. Cooking is another thing that I will do, especially with trying to figure out things that bring happy memories and such.

What I look for: Someone who can make me laugh and is willing to listen. Doesn’t cause feeling walking on eggshells constantly. People that care for others and are empathic. Able to deal with some distance at times due to needing time to mentally sort things. Acceptance of flaws and quirks but willing to help each other grow.

Have a good day, night, whichever is applicable to you, and thank you for your time.

Not that it matters because wikis exist, but I feel like I should mention that the last ResE game I played was the original 4 back when I was young. Everything else is just fandom osmosis if I’m being real, so if anyone reads this and is like “yeah Oz you dink it’s obvious” I apologize. 

Hope you enjoy!

== Resident Evil==>

I match you up with…

Rebecca Chambers 

Rebecca is the epitome of caring and empathetic, not to mention extremely intelligent and capable. She’ll keep up with you like few others can. 

As such, she’ll understand when you need space. And she’ll need it herself - she’s a busy gal. 

I imagine this is somewhat of an unspoken relationship - where the things you need to say are communicated with loving looks and gestures, and where it feels like you two may even be psychically connected. 

You also share a passion for activism. She’s been through hell, and so her dedication to making the world a better place is on par with yours. 

When you first meet, she’s the kind of person who you find yourself talking to for hours, completely out of nowhere. She’s easy to like, and what's more, she likes you, and likes hearing what you have to say. 

She’s also someone who you can feel comfortable around given her younger age. 

You both have the same way of behaving due to having to be around those who are alot older than you. 

She’ll be a stable figure in your life when you two start dating (which I imagine would be after a long few years of friendship under which romantic feelings simmer unsaid). She’s there when you need her, and even when you don’t, and she won’t hesitate to step in or help you. 

At the end of the day, it can sometimes feel like it’s you and her against the world. But maybe, together, you two can change that. 

[sorry-to-myself]

Growing Up With An Autistic Parent

Before I go into the main list of pros and cons, I wanna explain the situation. I am officially diagnosed with autism. My dad is not, but when I was diagnosed, he began to admit that he thinks he is. Everyone around him agrees with him on this. He is over 60 years old, so autism was not diagnosed much when he was young and it had a stigma associated around that timeframe. So, he was never (to his knowledge) diagnosed as autistic, but he did have anger issues and other psychological issues he was treated for that may have been related. I am also autistic. No, I do not know if his behaviors influenced mine or if I inherited it or what, and I don’t care either way. I accept my autism and I accept him with his. I am going to be honest about my experiences, though. Another disclaimer, these are my experiences. Every autistic person is different, every family is different, and every parent is unique. Also, for the record, my mother is very much not autistic, but she does have her own set of issues that I am not discussing right now. So, now to get into what it is like…

He will not get hints.

My father does not take hints. This sounds minor, but when you need tampons and just got your period for the first time, you wish you could hint. Also, he doesn’t pick up on hints about when you want to leave a situation or when you are uncomfortable, and it can be difficult to find a way to tell him directly if the situation is social. My dad and I created a code word for this exact reason, which helped a lot when I was younger. Finally, he will not get hints from other people. This is especially hard since I am also autistic, so we both struggle sometimes. This brings me to my next point….

I am often a translator.

My dad has a lot of difficulty with human interaction at times. I tend to have fewer problems in this regard, so I often end up trying to effectively translate for him. When he is sending an email or text, someone often has to help him make sure it isn’t way too curt. He is very honest and also very to-the-point. This can cause problems. Also, he often says the wrong thing at gatherings or in one-on-one interaction. In many cases, he interprets something wrong and never realizes it. Sometimes it is a bit like watching a house burn down, I see it but can’t stop it. I wish I was able to help him more, but I struggle myself, so it is like the blind leading the blind.

He can hurt my feelings.

This is not specific to autistic people, but it is amplified by his autism. For example, if he notices I gained weight, he is likely to just say it in a very matter-of-fact way. The same thing is true with hair, makeup, clothes, work of mine, and a lot of other things. He often thinks he is being helpful or that it is okay to say, but it can be hurtful. I used to think he meant to make me sad, now I realize he legitimately doesn’t realize it. Sometimes I have to remind myself of this.

He has a light switch temper.

I use this analogy because his temper is like a switch. It is either on or off, there is no middle. He will be very calm and then suddenly just have a complete angry meltdown. When he gets angry, it is one of the most terrifying things I have ever seen. When he loses control of his emotions, you wanna be far away. So, as a kid, I became scared of him after seeing that a few times. Sometimes I still have nightmares about that. I do have a similar temper, so I see both sides. But as a kid, that was absolutely terrifying.

Sometimes I end up being the parent in the situation.

He will sometimes not get what to do and lock up. Either that or he begins to exhibit more child-like behaviors and I have to be the one to manage him in the situation. It is easier for me than for most because I understand his mental state and how that feels, but it is also harder since I am challenged myself. Sometimes he refuses to do a necessary thing or freezes up or just doesn’t time things right in his daily life (ex. eating, sleeping, exercise). In that case, I have to watch out for him to make sure it doesn’t get out of control. Also, my mom or I have to pick clothes for him a lot of the time and iron them and prep them and then make sure he has them on right. All of it has forced me to grow up very fast, which I do believe has affected me negatively. It was especially difficult for me to help on my own bad days.

He is a very empathetic person.

My father has a lot of empathy. He doesn’t always handle a situation right, but he does feel empathy. In fact, he cares a lot more than most people. He often goes out of his way to try to demonstrate love. He does hug and say he loves me, but that is more scripted than his other gestures. To him, love is expressed in basic actions. For example, getting a favorite food a lot or playing a game with me. If you can get used to love being shown mostly in that way, it is pretty beautiful.

He is very sensitive.

He gets his feelings hurt easily. He takes comments to heart and gets very upset if someone gets upset with him. This means I have to be careful not to upset him, especially since I struggle with communication as well.

He is one of the smartest people I know.

My dad enjoys learning. He is good at it and he loves it. He remembers things that most people would forget and he thinks in ways that others cannot. He is likely a genius and some of his creations are absolutely amazing.

Special interests become shared.

While I may not love computers or mathematics with the same intensity that my dad does, I am forever getting involved in his special interest. We have learned to code together and programmed robots and disassembled computers. So, although that is not my special interest, it becomes something in my life because I care to know my dad.

I cannot tell when he is yelling.

His voice volume can be very incorrect. Sometimes it sounds like he is yelling even though he has no idea he is. So, it can be a challenge to know when he is upset or when he is actually not trying to be loud. Another downside to this is that I have some sound sensitivity, so it can be painful to me or extremely overwhelming.

He doesn’t try to hint at me.

He does not get hints, so he doesn’t hint at me as often as other people. He also uses fewer metaphors and expressions. This makes it a lot easier for me as an autistic person to communicate with him. Even for people who do not have autism, being around somebody who is honest and clear about his statements can be really refreshing. He is not very sarcastic and he says it like it is, so his advice and comments can be way more helpful than other people’s.

He has illustrated the downsides of autism.

Sometimes his experiences have made me genuinely afraid for myself and my future. Seeing the way that my mother infantilizes him at times and how others treat him when he exhibits autistic behaviors can be really hard for me. I also see how difficult it can be for an autistic person to function on their own. Seeing this example is both good and bad because it did prepare me more for the world and how to get myself and some of my other autistic friends through it, but it also breaks my heart daily to see how he is treated and it scares me.

I often have to repeat things or explain them differently.

Because he processes language more slowly than other people, I often have to say something again or explain it differently. While this isn’t a major problem, it can be frustrating at times or embarrassing. If it is a sensitive topic, it is hard to get the courage to repeat it.

He squeezes too hard.

He never realizes how hard he is squeezing someone. So, he tends to grip too tightly and it kinda hurts. But hey, at least he doesn’t shy away from physical contact.

It is harder to have friends over.

Having friends over can be a challenge. They don’t always understand him very well and can become frustrated or even offended. On the other hand, he also will “borrow” my autistic friends for a while because they are like him. I have very few friends, so this is less of a problem now, but it has been in the past.

He hates change.

This is good and bad. I hate change as well, so a lot of times it helps me that he does not like it. He is less likely to change things suddenly or be spontaneous, unlike my mother. Unfortunately, it can also be a downside. He has a hard time accepting changes in me, like me coming out as lesbian or dying my hair or changing anything else in my life. He is slow to change his ideas and beliefs about the world, which can be hard on me. He also sometimes avoids making changes that he needs to, which can cause problems in everyday life. He is not quick to replace things or modify a schedule.

I feel like he understands me.

He understands my behaviors better than most people. He is often able to give me uniquely helpful guidance about them and make me feel a lot less alone. The fact that he got through his teenage years gives me hope for myself and all the other autistic people I know. I am grateful to have him as my dad and I love him and his autism, and he loves me with mine.

[ichorandpride]

Tbh I sat up at night once and went "TFP Soundwave is nonverbal and autistic and nobody can tell me otherwise" and then I went to sleep completely satisfied with my brain for the moment

@shocktrooper-redstreaker @aphobic-soundwave @toothlessloveshiccup @agatharights tagging you guys since you all showed particular interest

but let’s talk about both TFP and G1 Soundwave? because pretty much all versions of Soundwave are strongly represented as autistic but those two are the strongest imo

and before anyone says “AUTISM CANT EXIST IN ROBOTS / CYBERTRONIANS / BLAH BLAH” well here’s a canonically autistic transformer!

Please note that this is mostly from my experience as an autistic person. There are MANY symptoms of autism and not every autistic person has them. Every autistic person is different!

If you want to learn more about autism (though I wouldn’t use these sources to write an autistic character – as with that, I would ask advice from actual autistic people), here  are  some  sources.

Also: remember to never use Autism Speaks as a resource/ref. for anything relating to autism! They literally want autistic people dead via eugenics lmao!

G1 (probably the most autistic imo):

he’s nonverbal. in G1, he’s shown to be almost exclusively nonverbal or reserved with his speech but then laugh and talk with Megatron, a person he’s comfortable with – autistic people (such as myself) can be quite talkative when around people we’re comfortable with.

he’s “socially awkward” - autism literally impedes people in social ability.

doesn’t understand most forms of verbal humor. we autistic people have a hard time detecting sarcasm from literal truth, metaphors, and other forms of humor. this is shown lots when the bots/cons make jokes and he’s entirely unresponsive or deadpan. LITERALLY HE ONLY LAUGHS TWICE IN THE ENTIRE G1 SERIES.Humor needs to be obvious and straight to the point for Soundwave. He laughs at more physical and obvious forms of humor such as when Starscream shoots at the “robotic plant” and his null ray beam bounces back to hit him and make him fall on his ass. Or when he’s kicking Blaster’s ass.Actually those two sources of evidence are the same video just at different times but yeah those are the only two times I can honestly remember that Soundwave’s laughed in canon despite the MANY jokes both the bots and cons have made around him.

he has motor skill difficulty. couldn’t find videos for this one so bear with me here. Soundwave in G1 has shown many times to have difficulty in motor skills. you can argue that it was just bad animation but shut up let us have this.If you watch G1, whenever the cons are making an escape, pay attention to how Soundwave runs in the bg. He’s clumsy and he almost trips a lot. He runs into things that he could easily jump over. HELL HE EVEN TRANSFORMS AT RANDOM SOMETIMES DURING ESCAPES LIKE WHY YOU DO THAT??

He’s monotone. Yeah yeah this is just a “soundwave trait” but lmao listen. Autistic people are terrible with our sense of voice inflections. We’re either too loud or too monotone and “emotionless” with our voices. Do I even have to source “evidence” for this bullshit?

he speaks in extremely specific ways. autistic people, when partially nonverbal (which G1 soundwave is), will speak in very specific ways. most of the time it sounds forced or awkward. usually we’re just trying to make sense of things and how to put words into coherent sentences.Soundwave speaks awkwardly. This is a simple fact.Even in utter panic he still speaks in his peculiar way.

he has huge empathy and emotion issues. autism effects people’s perception of emotions and empathy to the point where an autistic person can be blunt and have little to no sense of empathy or emotions (like Soundwave). it’s where one of the ableist myths that “autistic people are emotionless robots” comes from. (on the contrary, however, people with autism can also be hyper-emotional or hyper-empathetic and feel things to a huge extent - which IDW Soundwave also has going on whenever he lets his empath abilities loose).

TFP:

he’s nonverbal. like do we even need to debate this one. all soundwave’s are nonverbal and rarely speak.

he’s “socially awkward” - autism literally impedes people in social ability.

SPECIAL INTERESTS!!!!! TFP Soundwave is KNOWN to be a genius with anything tech related. You could easily argue that this is a special interest regarding tech things.(Special Interests (SI for short) are more than just having an intense interest in something. SI’s are specific to autism and mean that an autistic person is hyperfixating on something that interests them. This can lead to an autistic person knowing pretty much everything about a single subject (such as Soundwave with tech stuff) )

you could say that he visually stims with the lights on his visor. maybe people think he’s working but really he’s just stimmy. in case you didn’t know, stimming is a repetitive motion or behavior that autistic people (and ADHD people) do in order to relieve stress, focus, etc.

he has an “unusual gait” when walking which is actually one of the common traits of autism. he’s slouched and hunched all the time, only straightening out when Megatron is around (probably to show that he’s paying attention).

hyperfixates. not only on details to the point where he nitpicks what people say and replays recordings to them if he catches something, but also to the point where he hyperfixates on work almost obsessively. you could call this loyalty but my autistic ass calls it autism lmao.

He also has huge empathy and emotion issues, as explained above.

so yeah TLDR Soundwave is hugely represented to be autistic and no one can take autistic soundwave away from me