#giving myself a pep talk about not writing but instead just watching tv and reading and doing other things i enjoy

[queerdiazs]

december took it out of me because i don't have anything worthwhile to share for any tag games and i'm upset about it but i'm also forcing myself to be okay with it because i wrote so much and it's okay to take a break!!! it's OKAY to calm down for a second!!!

[alexswak]

From Castlevania to Boruto: Spencer Wan Interview

I myself had all sorts of questions after watching Castlevania, and seeing that Spencer Wan was so active on Twitter I thought I might try asking him, what resulted in a long interview. The scene he is best known for is the abstract black-lines-only part of the opening, but he had remarkable participations in many other known projects despite his young age. Other than Castlevania, where he animated, AD’ed and directed episodes even, he also worked on Boruto and Invader Zim among others. My notes are in bold. Conducted on behalf of AnimeTherapy and originally posted on their website.

 First tell me a bit about yourself and how you started with animation.

Spencer: You know, that might be the only question I wasn’t prepared to answer. I’m not great at talking about myself. Okay, I’m 25 years old and I’m from a small town in the Deep South. I got into animation after seeing Norio Matsumoto’s work on Naruto. I used to watch it with my friends in high school and I’d never seen anything like it before.  I’d intended to major in illustration when I got into college, but I ended up swapping to animation at the last second because I couldn’t get his work out of my head. I thought maybe I could learn how to make animation like that at school.

Where did you start your professional career and how?

Spencer: So after I dropped out of school I spent a year sort of just wandering around and doing very little with my life. I was having a hard time finding any sort of work, let alone artistic work. I ended up working in a tire shop for a while, actually. Dana Terrace was the one who dragged me out of that. She’s the creator of the show I’m working on now(The Owl House). I’d helped her with one of her student films when we were in school, and she was doing way better than me as a professional artist. She gave me a sort of a pep talk and told me about this animation studio called Animation Domination High Def that was looking for animators.

It's worth mentioning that there aren't very many studios in the United States that hire traditional(hand-drawn) animators anymore. We were even told in school not to pursue traditional animation as a career because those jobs didn't exist. Anyway, I applied the next day, they had me do an animation test, and few weeks later I moved across the country to work for them.

The work I did there was very different from the work people expect from me now. It was mostly parody cartoons, and we had to animate 2-3 scenes a day so it was hard to make anything look very good. It was a difficult job, and it wasn't what I wanted to be doing with animation, but it taught me how to draw very fast.

An interesting backstory, really. So you stuck with traditional animation because you wanted to create something like what Matsumoto makes?

Spencer: That's how I started anyway, but he was just my first exposure to this sort of animation. When I got older I came across the work of Yutaka Nakamura, Mitsuo Iso, Toshiyuki Inoue, etc. They're all incredible in different ways, but I could feel that they were also drawing on something similar. There's a sort of feeling I used to get looking at the work of a really talented Japanese animator, and I really wanted my work to illicit that same feeling.

It would've been a lot easier to change tracks to storyboarding or design. I had enough technical skill to do it, and there were many more opportunities available, but I stuck with traditional animation because I was chasing that feeling. I knew I couldn't be satisfied as an artist until I understood it.

Alright, now to more specific stuff. How did you get involved in Castlevania?

Spencer: Well after working at ADHD, I ended up moving away from LA because I couldn't find anyone who wanted to hire me for animation. I went back to my hometown and spent a year freelancing for scraps. I actually tried to go to Japan for work at one point, but my visa was rejected because I'm a college dropout. It was around this time that Sam(Samuel Deats), the future director of Castlevania, had been emailing me to try to get me to work for Powerhouse. Actually, I rejected him the first time and tried to get my visa through again…

Obviously that didn't work out, so I told Sam I'd changed my mind and I moved to Texas to work for Powerhouse. He'd been telling me the whole time about this awesome secret project the studio might acquire soon. I completely wrote him off because as a freelancer you hear that sort of thing all the time and it's never as good as it sounds. That project was Castlevania. It ended up getting greenlit after I'd been working at the studio for a couple months. Sam plucked me off the animation team to work on it and I started storyboarding on the first episode. It was actually my first time storyboarding, so naturally I was given the scene where the crowd gets attacked by an army of creatures in an elaborate gothic city.

I see. Then can you give me a quick overview of the workflow the staff followed while working on Castlevania? From finished storyboards to finished scenes. I'm interested in the workflow you followed since Castlevania is obviously not your run-of-the-mill project.

Spencer: *laughs* Well in season one it was a constantly changing process. Powerhouse had never handled a TV show before, and so we were sort of creating the process as the show went on. We didn't even manage to standardize our storyboarding process until episode 4. Our background team doubled as our incidental and prop design team, with one of the background artists serving as a part time storyboarder. Sam was the director, but he was also storyboarding and designing all the main characters. His brother Adam, who's meant to be supervising compositor, became our editor. It was all over the place, but it allowed for a lot of experimentation. That's how I came to animate on the show instead of just storyboarding.

I'm getting kind of off topic though- the way it would usually work is that we'd receive an approved script and we'd have a few weeks to storyboard it. We didn't have any revisionists working with us, so if there was a problem, we'd address it ourselves and then Adam would cut together an animatic and add sound. It's worth mentioning that we didn't have any voice acting to work with in season 1, so we sort of had to guess at how the actors would read their lines.

After the animatic was approved we would ship it along with the designs and key backgrounds to MUA Film, our outsourcing studio in Korea. And then in some specific instances we would leave a note telling them to exclude a sequence, because Sam or I had planned to animate it ourselves. After storyboarding was done I jumped right onto animation. We were working with a pencil and paper animation studio, so even though I work digitally, I would have to write x-sheets(equivalent to time sheets in anime) for my work as if I'd drawn it on paper. At some point in the process we decided we wanted to do a much more specific compositing job on the show, and so we had the studio ship us back their cleaned and colored animation, and our in house compositing team would polish it with a mountain of after effects work. A lot of why the show looks so cinematic is because of them.

So I take it this is how it went with the average scene. But your scene in the OP, that got a lot of attention, is clearly exceptional. Can you tell me more about how you came up with this style and scene? Personally I have to admit, it’s one of the best and most striking animation pieces I have seen in a while.

Spencer: Thanks! We really slaved over that opening. It actually wasn't meant to exist- there was no time or budget set aside for it. Sam had done the storyboards for it in his free time and pitched them to the producers. They said we could do it if we could somehow find time for it. I think Sam originally intended to handle the entire thing himself, but when the time came to animate it, I was the only one available. So Sam pulled me into his office and showed me the storyboards, specifically the part at the end. He said something to the effect of, "I know I want this to look like fire. You can do it in whatever style you come up with, as long as it's done quickly." Never in my career had someone put so much trust in me. A lot of people like to compare the sequence to the music video for Take On Me, but when I was trying to come up with the style, the first thing that came to mind was one of Yutaka Nakamura's animations. It's from an anime I watched in high school called Soul Eater where the character goes to draw his sword, and the entire scene turns into this abstract looking sort of river of pencil lines on a red background(this scene). I thought maybe I could do something similar to that. It took me about an hour to realize I couldn't do it the same way, and my imitation of it was coming out far too abstract to tell what was going on. I ended up doing another pass on it, but instead of trying to copy Nakamura's abstract linework, I tightened up the drawings focused on the shadows. I thought I could try to mimic the look of how light shifts around on an ember, and that's where I got the shadows that constantly roll across the characters. The finished result still bears a lot of his influence, but I think I managed to put my own spin on it.

I remember that Soul Eater scene! Now that you mention it, I can definitely see similarities. But the Take on Me? Not really. How much time did you spend on that scene, if I may ask?

Spencer: It was something like two weeks? I don't remember that well anymore. I worked entirely through the last four nights, so it felt longer than that. I remember losing an hour to daylight savings time, and that put me in a really foul mood.

I've never mentioned this before, but it's unfinished. I ran out of time in the end, and so the part with Trevor and Sypha is just my rough first pass. I was devastated when we shipped it that way. At the time I considered it to be my biggest failure as an artist. Ironically it's the piece of work I'm known best for now.

Sypha's scene in the 2nd season is also yours right? Glad to see the same style made it into the show.

Spencer: Adam had wanted to have it in the show for a while, and I really didn’t want to do it. I was so upset about the opening before it aired that I swore I would never draw in that style again. But then the opportunity presented itself and I thought, “Well I guess it would only be for a second or so”. I felt the second time I did it it was a lot less inspired though.

Can't complain myself, it was pretty cool.

Spencer: Well I had more experience the second time *laughs*. I didn’t have to feel around for what the style was.

So moving on. The problem with your Alucard fight scene, that you had problems translating your digital motion guides into paper, you said that also happened for the Cyclops sequences. How widespread was this problem then? Did it only affect your work or the work of other animators as well?

Spencer: It would only affect animations that had large camera movements, that we sent overseas for clean up. It was a problem born from the fact that we don’t really do paper animation in America anymore.

When the camera moves around a lot, the field has to get bigger. You have to use something called panning paper in order for the drawings to maintain a proper size for clean up. But there was no one that I could learn that from. I had to teach everything to myself, and so my first instinct was to make the drawings smaller to fit them on the page. The clean up artists overseas fixed this by scaling the drawings up, but then they had to recreate my spacing from scratch and they didn’t have enough time to do it the same way. The result was that drawings would pop anywhere from a few pixels to a few millimeters out of position all the time. Adam ended up respacing everything, but it wasn’t a perfect match to the original, so drawings tend to pop around. Most people don’t notice it though.

Actually I’ve had a similar issue with other productions where if my spacing gets too tight, there’s a chance a drawing could pop out of place too. I’m still learning how to solve some of those problems.

I see! Shame you found yourself in this situation, but this is a nice segue to another traditional project I want to ask you about, Boruto. You worked on Boruto a few months ago, episode #65 specifically. How did you get involved in this project? You were an interesting case because you are not affiliated with studio LAN like most of other foreign animators in that episode, as far as I know at least.

Spencer Wan: *laughs* I could see why it seemed a little out of nowhere. It's because Chengxi and I had already been talking on twitter for a while. I consider him a close friend. He asked me to animate for him and I agreed. It was as simple as that.

Looking at your original work and the final version in Boruto, I see that it went mostly uncorrected. Why is that? Were you just given a lot of freedom in that episode? Because of Chengxi and your aforementioned good relation with him?

Spencer: Oh, it was nothing like that. I was a lot more concerned with doing the work properly than trying to stand out or show off. Chengxi's storyboards and the model sheets for Boruto were very clear. I followed them to the best of my ability, and my work ended up going uncorrected aside from a light fill being added. I should've anticipated the need for that light fill, actually. I wasn't thinking about how it would look in color.

Boruto is more of a traditional animation(paper) show, right? Didn't you have problems with that this time?  I'm not too knowledgeable when it comes to Boruto specifically, so I don't know how much of its production is digitalized.

Spencer: The process was actually very similar to what I used on Castlevania, only this time there was no complicated camera movement to worry about, and I had Chengxi to help me with parts of the paper process that I didn't fully grasp yet. Some of the other foreign animators helped me out too- namely Guzzu. It was my first time not having to figure it all out on my own, and I was really grateful for that. I feel I learned a lot.

You are right, the nature of this scene is different. I thought maybe it was the Japanese industry being more used to this dual nature of digital and paper. So generally working on Boruto, although a Japanese show, wasn’t different from Castlevania and other shows you worked on before?

Spencer: There are differences in style when it comes to x-sheets. For example, the Korean x-sheets I've written list the layer order completely backward from the Japanese ones used on Boruto. Americans will write "truck out" when they want the camera to pull out, but the Japanese shorthand is apparently T.B for "track back" instead. It's a lot of differences like that, but the idea behind them is mostly the same. It was an adjustment, but not a very big one, and I was told I did an alright job writing them... I hope they weren't just being nice.

I was just watching Castlevania and now that you mentioned him, Chengxi did some animation! Also others such as Hero. Were you the one who invited them this time?

Spencer: I was the one who invited Chengxi. Sam invited the others after I’d left the production.

And you inviting Chengxi and working on #7 was after boruto, I suppose?

Spencer: Actually it was beforehand! He had to cut his work short to start working on Boruto. He did such a brilliant job regardless. That guy is a genius.

Aha, interesting. That was the last of my questions, I'm very grateful for the chance you gave me and for your amazing, detailed answers!

Spencer: No problem! I hope my answers weren’t too boring. That technical stuff can get dense.

[crowdvscritic]

round up // AUGUST 19

It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? 

Let me assure you—it’s not you, it’s me. You know those times in life when watching and writing about every Best Picture winner in a regular cadence feels impossible? No? That’s just me? Every time I think I’m about to get going on this Best Picture Project again, it seems like life finds another reason for me to spend packing up boxes or suitcases again (or sometimes even just packing more into my tired, little mind). As the trailer for the World War I film 1917 says, “TIME IS THE ENEMY.” The all-caps treatment feels appropriate here, too.

But because my tired, little mind does ache to write about movies, I’ve been inspired to try a new segment—inspired by my very own sister. She’s a writer with a drive and commitment to her travel blog I envy sometimes. (But don’t worry, it’s in more an I’m-proud-of-her kind of way than an Othello kind of way.) Every month over at Round Trip, she rounds up the highlights and new things she’s tried each month. They’re some of my favorite posts to read, so I thought I’d create my own version with a Crowd vs. Critic twist. (But don’t worry—it’s more an imitation-is-the-sincerest-form-of-flattery thing than a Talented Mr. Ripley kind of thing.) Each month I’ll be sharing my favorite crowd-pleasers and my top critic picks. The twist on that? I’m recommending more than just films. These are the new-to-me cultural artifacts I’ve loved in a rough order of when I experienced them, including (but not limited to) a TV show, podcast, lengthy feature article, art exhibit, and music video. Oh, and of course, a few movies I’ve seen or am excited for, too.

August Crowd-Pleasers

Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)

I’m not really a Fast & Furious gal, and this movie is grade-A bonkers. But Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and Jason Statham make stupid one-liners land like nobody else. Seeing Princess Margaret taking control of her life was unexpectedly satisfying, and kudos to this team for knowing this is the kind of movie that should be as indulgent and over-the-top as it wants. Crowd: 10/10 // Critic: 6/10

Minority Report (2002)

Not everything about this Steven Spielberg/Tom Cruise flick gels, and the influence of contemporary blockbusters like The Matrix and Star Wars is excessive. But its take on the surveillance state was prescient, and it’s still a tense thriller. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

Veronica Mars (TV series: 2004-2007, 2019; Movie: 2014)

I’ve been looking for a way to watch this teen detective drama for awhile, and I know why people have been recommended this to me for years. With the new Hulu reboot, the original series is finally available there as well, and I couldn’t stop watching. I’ve given up on other, critically loved shows in an episode or less because I struggle watching violence against women—sorry, The Americans, The Handmaid’s Tale, and Jessica Jones. Veronica Mars somehow handles those storylines with all the seriousness and sensitivity they deserve but without the graphic depictions that make me feel sick. Smart, funny, and addictive, it’s the kind of binge I love, and now I’m just trying to emotionally recover from that new season.

I Feel Pretty (2018)

I’m also not much of an Amy Schumer gal, but this really clicked. If all message movies were this funny and clever, maybe they would have a better chance at making the world a better place. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 6.5/10

The Micheaux Mission

Len and Vince’s thoughtful, funny podcast covering every Black Film ever made took a “Binge Lounge” detour into a retrospective on Black Family Sitcoms this month from the most obvious (The Cosby Show) to the obscure (Julia). Now that I’ve finished Veronica Mars, I might need to revisit the gem that is Everybody Hates Chris.

The King’s Man trailer (2020)

Unclear why the franchise is deviating from the dynamic duo of Taron Egerton and Colin Firth, but color me intrigued.

Rolling Stone’s “Millennial 100”

This beast of a list was published last fall, but I just happened upon it and read all 100 entries. Inevitably, Every Millennial will find something missing on this list (Where is Gilmore Girls? Why do we need to list Taylor Swift’s boyfriends instead of her music?), but it’s a solid summation of the influences on our childhood and adolescence.

August Critic Picks

Paul Gauguin: The Art of Invention at The Saint Louis Art Museum

#NerdAlert: I’m a huge fan of museums. Like, I need to give myself pep talks to remind myself it’s not possible to see everything in one museum in one visit. As members of SLAM, my mom and I were invited to a free, guided tour through a new Gauguin exhibit, which is just another reason to consider supporting your local art museum.

1917 trailer (2019)

Maybe Colin Firth was unavailable for a Kingsman sequel because he and Benedict Cumberbatch were filming this World War I film with a December release prime for Oscar season. Color me intrigued again.

Atlas: Enneagram by Sleeping at Last

I’ve been learning a lot about the Enneagram in the last year, and no personality test (for lack of a more accurate term) has helped me understand how to love others and myself better than this one. I loved the artistry and thoughtfulness behind this album, which brings each type’s longings and fears and strengths and faults into song. (And not just because they’re coming from a fellow 9.) Bonus: There’s an accompanying podcast I’m still digging into.

Roman Holiday on the Big Screen

I caught a screening of one of my favorite Audrey Hepburn movies at the Tivoli Theatre, and she and Gregory Peck were truly larger than life.

Léon: The Professional

This month at ZekeFilm, we watched Natalie Portman movies we’d never seen before. I watched and loved her feature film debut, which came out the year she turned 13. She’s been a knockout from the get-go, and this movie holds up 25 years later. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9/10

Lover by Taylor Swift

When she released Speak Now, I knew I’d buy the next 10 Taylor Swift albums, and Lover might be in the running for my new favorite of her collections. (I’ll have to listen to it 100 more times to be sure, so come find me in about two weeks.) I loved reputation., but her lyrical prowess and synth-y production have met in a magical and mellifluous 18-track opus. The first five tracks are chef’s-kiss perfection, that “Lover” music video is an aesthetic dream. (t’s not every day I hear a song and immediately can hear it still on the radio in 30 years.) I don’t think she gets enough credit for her songs about friends and family, and some of her best are here as well. I’m both in awe and so proud as a decade-plus fan.

Also in August…

On SO IT’S A SHOW? this month, I watched a cult classic movie and a classic TV show with my pal and co-host Kyla Carneiro for our pop culture podcast. Catch our episodes on Ed Wood and The Carol Burnett Show (and how they connect with Gilmore Girls) on our Tumblr.

I watched 1960s crime thriller Midas Run on Kino Lorber’s new Blu-ray for ZekeFilm. It was…not good.

Until next time, follow what films I’m watching in real time on Letterboxd and find more reviews and features at ZekeFilm.

Photo credits: The Micheaux Mission, Rolling Stone, Sleeping at Last, Taylor Swift. Paul Gauguin and Tivoli Theatre my own. All others IMDb.com.

[im-an-eh-sayer]

The Man in the Alley

Jungkook x reader

Words: 3k

Genre: Horror, hero!Jungkook, neighbor!Jungkook

Here @bangtanscript this is what I was writing when I freaked myself out.  Haha I’m a scardy cat, it’s not even scary.  Actually re-reading it, it’s kind of dumb😂  oh well I still hope you like it!!

******

It was dark now, as you had arrived home from work later than usual. You sighed as you changed into your jogging clothes, you hated running at night but you knew yourself well enough to know that if you skipped one night you would stop all together and have to start at the beginning again.

You plugged your headphones into your phones headphone jack and fastened your phone to your arm, grabbing your keys and stepping outside.

As you turned and locked your door you could see your breath against the cold night. It was winter but you were still jogging as the snow had mostly melted and the sidewalks were cleared. You gave yourself a silent pep talk before starting your jog through your neighborhood.

You knew your neighborhood to be a safe one and during the day you loved being outside, but there was something about the night in your neighborhood that always made you feel on edge.

You had been jogging for about 20 minutes before a shiver went down your spine making an unsettling feeling of unease creep into your stomach. Suddenly you were all to aware of the dimly lit streets and the dark houses and businesses around you.

As you continued to jog on you found that the feeling would not subside. Nervous you lowered the volume of your music, even taking out one of your ear buds to be more aware of your surroundings.

As it was you were to far from your house to turn back, you were better off continuing on your course instead, and so you strengthened your resolve and pushed forward, convincing yourself you were brave. And soon enough you started to believe it.

As you rounded a corner, one of the last on your trek you even began to feel better, convincing yourself you were merely paranoid because of the cold darkness surrounding you. You even slowed your pace to one that was more comfortable determined to finish your jog relaxed.

Finally as you were coming nearer the last street on your route you let out a relived sigh and even chuckled a bit at how much you had worked yourself up over nothing. That is until you rounded the corner coming onto your street and heard the deranged laughter of a man standing farther down the same sidewalk you were running on.

You stopped in your tracks and had to clap a hand over your own mouth to stifle a gasp. You were terrified, the laughter for the man getting louder and more crazy by the second. You were breathing heavily your fear growing with every moment that passed.

You stared at him his back facing you as you tried to tell your legs to run, something about this man wasn’t good, wasn’t right. Soon enough your leg had manged to move and you took a silent step back, and that was when the man went quiet, his laughter stopping.

Slowly, ever so painfully slowly he turned to face you. You wanted to scream when you saw his face, pale white, emotionless and his empty, almost dead eyes staring at you. You wanted to get away, to run to scream to ANYTHING but you just couldn’t, no matter how hard you tried. You could only stare back at him and watch in horror as he slowly cocked his head to the side. A huge, evil smile then spread across his face and he slowly pulled something that shone in the light from his pocket.

“Will you help me?” He asked you cocking his head to the other side. An ear splitting scream finally erupted from your chest as he took a slow deliberate step towards you and then charged off in a full sprint directly towards you, and that was when you finally turned and ran off like a shot in the other direction in an effort to get away from him.

Tears cascaded down your cheeks blurring your vision as you ran, and over your terrified sobs you could hear the footsteps of the deranged man behind you and something, maybe metal dragging across the pavement. You were starting to get tired, and that simply added to your fear, you started to stumble, but always managing to save yourself before falling.

A loud sob escaped you as you heard the man catching up. I’m going to die, you thought to yourself as you rounded another corner. You were on the verge of giving up when hands, two hands reached out from a darkened alleyway one covering your mouth and the other dragging you back into the sinister depths of the alley.

You kicked frantically trying to wriggle out of the alley’s phantom grasp, your sobs almost inaudible beneath the cold hand over your mouth. You could hear the deranged man, still laughing as he ran down the street and you wanted to throw up at the thought of him finding you, at the thought of what he and his friend who had grabbed you had planned.

You were dragged farther and farther into the alley the hope leaking out of your heart as the street you were once on grew farther away from you after every passing moment.

Suddenly the hands on you faltered, the legs that were helping drag you into the abyss of darkness stumbled and that was all you needed. You reared your leg forward and kicked back as hard as you could. Again the hands faltered loosening their grip, this was your chance you struggled as hard as you could to escape, to run, to be free of the darkness that was so desperately dragging you into it. But it was no use. No sooner had the hands faltered after your kick, then they had regained their hold on you this time dragging you behind a dumpster and roughly shoving you against the cold brick wall. There was nowhere to go now. You were stuck between a wall and a man who had no intentions of letting you go.

You started shaking violently with fear as you heard the mans deranged laughter get closer and closer to the alley entrance and you squeezed your eyes shut, listening, waiting to hear him stop running and start down the alley towards you and his accomplice.

But it never happened, instead as the laughter grew louder as the crazy man approached, the alley man pushed into you even more practically flattening you against the wall. And then it happened. The laughter reached the alleyway, and you heard him stop running as he stared into it. You waited for him to walk towards you again but he didn’t, instead he let out another loud roaring laugh that made you tense up and then he continued running, but to your surprise away from you, past the alley continuing down the street you were no longer on.

Suddenly you heard a tense sigh escape the alley man’s mouth and he loosened his grip on you.

“Jesus Y/N!” The alley man whisper shouted at you. “What the fuck are you doing out at a time like this!” You recognized the voice almost immediately and your eyes flew open, once more filling with tears, but this time tears of relief.

The man fully released you and you turned to look at him, your neighbor Jeon Jungkook. You wasted no time in grabbing hold of him to make sure he was real. To make sure he was actually there and you weren’t dead already. But he was there and he was real, wrapping his arms around your shaking frame. You tried hard to breath choking on your sobs and Jungkook had to replace his hand across your mouth. 

“Shh. He may hear you and come back!” He chided you “hurry let’s go” he said wrapping an arm around your waist to steady you as he guided you deeper into the alley, which you now recognized was the one that led to his house.

With shaky steps you finally managed to make it to Jungkook’s backyard fence and he let go of you reaching up and over it to unhitch the lock.

Quietly he swung open the door and you both stepped into the familiar yard. You only paused a second to wait for Jungkook as he closed the high fence gate shut and replaced the lock. You were still shaking and had tears running down your face but you refused to leave his side, opting to wait for him instead of entering his house alone.

Jungkook made quick work of the gate and was back at your side in no time, once more wrapping an assuring steady arm around your waist as he guided you across his back lawn and up the back porch steps to his door. He took his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door. He opened it and as you were about to step into his house you both heard a sound that made you pause. Loud laughter. You both looked at each other and Jungkook practically shoved you inside following you right away, quickly closing the door and locking it behind him.

Finally inside you broke down, your legs giving out from under you and loud sobs erupting from our chest. Jungkook crouched down beside you rubbing your back as he pulled out his phone and called 911. He explained everything to the dispatcher and agreed to stay on the line until the police arrived.

There was a pause and the room delved into silence only broken by your sobs. Jungkook let out a curse and then started in on you.

“What the fuck were you thinking?!” He practically yelled at you making you flinch. “Don’t you watch the news Y/N?! There was a goddamn citywide alert out for this guy! People were advised to stay inside and lock their doors! Jesus what were you thinking?!” He ripped into you with no remorse, not caring how terrified you still were, all his efforts to comfort you now gone, replaced by his harsh scolding.

“I didn’t know!” You cried “i got home late from work and i went straight out for a run i didn’t even turn on the TV or the radio!” You paused to take in a gulp of air through your sobs. “I’m sorry!” You whimpered looking up at him.

His face softened immediately. “No i’m sorry” he said “you’re absolutely terrified but i just yelled at you! I was just worried about you! If i hadn’t of come home early and seen you run by my house-” he trailed off his hands balling into fists his knuckles turning white. He didn’t continue his sentence instead opting to wrap his arms around you pulling you tight against his chest. “You’re okay now” he said his voice soft, “you’re with me now i’ll protect you”

You couldn’t help yourself, you clutched at his shirt balling the fabric into your fists as you trembled in his tight embrace.

After a few minutes your tears finally slowed and you loosened your grip on his shirt. You sniffled, turning your gaze up to his and opening your mouth to say something. But you stopped before you could get the words out as you heard a knock on the wall coming from outside. And you heard a muffled voice ask

“will you help me?”.

At the sound of the voice coming through the wall from outside you froze, a shuddering breath of terror escaping your lips. Jungkook was quick to pick up his cell and tell the dispatcher who was still on the line that the psycho had found the two of you and was right outside his house.

The man outside knocked again, softly, repeatedly, his knocks getting louder and louder until he was banging on the wall. You whimpered terrified, pressing your hands to your ears like a child in an effort to make yourself not hear the banging.

Suddenly Jungkook grabbed you practically lifting you up off the floor and carrying/dragging you upstairs to his room, where he let you go and closed the door locking it behind him and trying to push a few pieces of furniture in front of it. Suddenly the gravity of the situation dawned on you and you were up on your feet helping to try and push Jungkook’s furniture against his door barricading it. 

He then grabbed your hand and led you into his en-suite leading you to his tub and guiding you to sit down on the edge of it. He then turned away from you a closed the bathroom door, again locking it behind him.

You hadn’t stayed sitting on the edge of the bathroom oh no you had crawled into the corner, your back pressed up against the cold wall. Jungkook joined you wrapping you in his arms again petting your head and talking into the phone telling the 911 dispatcher what was happening.

Suddenly the banging downstairs stopped, only to be replaced a moment later with the sound of shattering glass, and then laughter filled the air, growing louder as you guessed he made his way up the stairs.

Again you were reduced to a shaking mess of fear on the ground waiting, simply waiting to see if he would somehow manage to get in. If he would somehow manage to get you.

The laughter stopped, again replaced by knocking like the man had done while he was outside. You felt the urge to throw up as bile climbed up your throat, and you heard him ask the question again, even more muffled as he was two rooms away and you knew he must have been screaming it.

“Will you help me?”

You felt Jungkook tense up when the man asked the question and you knew he heard it too. After a moments pause the banging resumed once more constant and getting louder. This continued on for what seemed like hours until you finally heard sirens approaching. You thought the banging would stop now, that the man would run to avoid capture, but it didn’t stop instead it got louder, more frantic, like he was desperate to get in. To come get you.

You heard the splintering of wood and shivered when Jungkook whispered almost in disbelief “he broke the door”.

With a frantic grip you pushed your back even harder into Jungkook’s chest as he was sitting behind you, in an effort to get even farther away from the door as you already were, wishing you could disappear into the wall itself. You gripped Jungkook’s wrist that was around your waist trying to keep your fear in check as you waited in terrified agony for the man to break into the bathroom you were hiding in.

Instead you suddenly heard shouts and running footsteps, and then gunfire from the hallway of Jungkook’s house and after a few minutes the gun fire ceased and an eerie silence filled the house.

Now you heard a different voice shouting that it was safe to come out. Jungkook shifted from behind you but you grabbed his wrist and held him tight.

“What if it’s a trick?” You cried. Jungkook looked at you then started talking into the receiver to the dispatcher again. After a few moments he assured you that it wasn’t and that the police had gotten him. You hesitantly let him go and he walked slowly towards the bathroom door, unlocking it and opening it slowly. 

You stayed crouched in the corner as you saw Jungkook leave the bathroom and you waited for him to tell you everything was okay now. Soon enough you heard voices from the bedroom and Jungkook walked back into the bathroom towards you, a relived smile on his face.

He bent over offering you his hand. With a shaking hand you grabbed onto his and he pulled you up, putting his arms securely around yours as he lead you out of the bathroom, through the bedroom, and eventually out onto his front lawn where he walked you to a waiting ambulance surrounded by police cars their lights flashing.

A blanket was placed around your shoulders and you just sat there clutching onto it blanket as Jungkook stood beside you giving the police his statement.  

Soon enough you had finally calmed down enough to recount what had happened telling the officer everything, your voice shaking. You were then informed that the man had been caught trying break down the bedroom door with a large knife in hand and when he had seen the police he attacked them, causing them to shoot and kill him.

You felt better though you were ashamed to admit it, knowing the man was now dead. You thanked the officer and he left. Then you turned your attentions back on Jungkook who wad getting an injury on his wrist treated.

“Did i do that?” You asked him remembering you tight grip on him in the bathroom. “It’s fine” he said smiling at you “it’s not that bad.” Tears spilled down your cheeks once more and he was on his feet in an instant asking what he had said.

You smiled at him. “Nothing, you didn’t say anything” you said through your tears “thank you so much Jungkook if it weren’t for you-” he cut you off when he brought his warm hand to your cheek, gently brushing your tears away. You smiled at him through your tears and he hugged you. 

“Come on Y/N let’s get you home” he said gently. You nodded and he held your hand as he walked you home a police escort following closely behind you just in case.

As you stood outside your apartment fumbling with your keys you mumbled about being to tense to sleep that night, and Jungkook agreed. You asked him if he was even allowed to go back home since it was the scene of an investigation now and he told you he wasn’t.

“Then just stay here” you said finally unlocking the door, “I’ll make coffee and we can watch a movie or something,” you said looking down. “I could use a cup of coffee” he laughed and you smiled.

“Besides” he said stepping into your apartment behind you “this way I’ll be able to protect you better.” Your smile grew as you showed him to the living room and excused yourself to start the coffee. Finally. Finally you were safe again. Safe with Jungkook by your side.