#god the liveries got me insane

[dead-leavez]

The McLaren Senna liveries for Monaco has me going INSANE but the racing suits LMFAO. LORD.

( Chatter about it below the cut!! )

The sprite cans looking down at me from the top shelf of the fridge:

Whoever chose to put the stripe that low WHO ARE YOU? 😭 it brings the leading line too low and makes the bottom half of the suit look lowhanging LOL. Love the placement of their numbers though.

NOW THE BACK OF THE SUIT ON THE OTHER HAND! OHHHH MY GOD IT LOOKS SO GOOD.

Whoever did this is genius. Collar and back matching, plus more leading lines accentuating the shoulders???? AAAARARARA.

The colour choice was not at all what I was expecting to be honest, but to be fair when I think Senna I think Red, Yellow? White. But the Brazilian flag's colours make a lot of sense (OBVIOUSLY LMFAO.)

And man I love the helmets, ESPECIALLY Lando's. I'll always love his fucking helmets tho, they're just so fucking good, I'm obsessed. And biased a bit but sue me.

[skitskatdacat63]

Vettonso x Similar Helmets

SV Germany 2012 x FA Monaco 2013: Gold & Dark Red

I think a lot about Vettonso and their mutual relationship witn gold. They're both golden boys, they're both seen lit gold by the sunshine on many podiums throughout the years, both have worn golden boots, and as you can see here: both have worn golden helmets. The parallels in these particular helmets makes me feel insane. Both are: gold with dark red accents, both have their birthplace's coat of arms(Bergstraße and Asturias), both have team animal motifs, and both have symbols to represent their two championships(You by now know the signifigance of the ones on Fernando's helmet, but I think the ones on Seb's are actually a callback to his Formula BMW days when he used to put the smiley stickers on his car for every win.)

And did you know both of these helmets were designed by the same helmet design company? Yep, both of these are JMD helmets. I know JMD helmets are/were pretty popular, but still, there's something to me about Fernando commissioning the same designer that Seb has been using since he was a literal child. Parallels, am I right?

SV Japan 2010 x FA Japan 2023: White with Black & Red

Haha I remember @protocolseben and I discussing this a bit back in September when Fernando's helmet dropped. I honestly think Seb is such an innovator and trailblazer in terms of helmet design, and you can see his influence in helmet design as recently as this past season. I'm not sure if he was the first ever driver to don a matte white helmet with red accents as a representation of the Japanese flag, but it certainly envoked him in my mind when I saw Fernando's!!

I think Fernando's is pretty similar to all of Seb's 2010-2012 Japan helmets but I like this one the most so! I think if Seb wasn't restrained by the Red Bull logo, he def wouldv'e put the red circle where Nando put his so I think Fernando did a really good job, even if unintentionally, at emulating Seb's sense of design.

SV Singapore 2012 x FA Singapore 2012: Sparkly!

Like I said in the one above, it's crazy how much Seb influenced helmet design. He was pretty much the pioneer of sparkly helmets for Singapore, right? It drives me absolutely insane that there's actually pictures of them together in such similar designed helmets. It's kinda funny actually that even though they're pretty deep in the championship fight at this point, and Seb just got one up on Fernando; Fernando is wearing a helmet that is a direct influence from Seb!!! Is that not insane???

Also, Fernando trying to be camp with trying the now in vogue sparkly Singapore helmet, and Seb accidentally completely blew him out of the water with his outrageous light up LED constellation helmet. But god yeah....to have pics of them in matching helmets from this era particuarly makes me emotional ;;;

SV Hungary 2021 x FA 2022: Pink with Dark Blue

I really could've picked any of Seb's 2021 helmets, but I thought this one matched the best with Fernando's main 2021 helmet(with the color pallet.) Also one thing, it's crazy how much control BWT has as a sponsor, I don't think I've ever seen another sponsor go so hard at having a chokehold on individuality. I like that we got pink liveries and pink helmets, but I don't think they should have that much control.

I'm almost kinda sad there wasn't any Miami GP in 2021, because I think that was the only unique helmet Fernando had in 2022. But these match pretty well! Pretty in pink!! It's crazy that their parallels in the 2020s are ongoing even before Fernando actually takes over Seb's seat. Thanks BWT I guess?

SV Abu Dhabi 2022 x FA Abu Dhabi 2022: Fernando's Seb Tribute Helmet

AND HERE WE HAVE THE PIÈCE DE RÉSISTANCE!!! The ultimate conclusion, it literally couldn't get better than this!! This is still unbelievable, like how is this an actual thing that happened!? Fernando intentionally branding his helmet, the only symbol of individuality in F1, with his rival's flag colors, HIS FLAG!!!!! Not to mention the literal "Vettono Best Moments" collage he posted alongside it....and the hand-holding....and everything that happened with them at Abu Dhabi 2022....

But god, after years of incidentally making parallel helmet designs, Fernando decided to officially tie the knot of the red string of fate, and make a helmet directly referencing Seb's. I think it's funny because as I said with two of the previously mentioned ones, those Fernando designs are pretty much inspired by Seb's, and here he is openly making one directly inspired by Seb. I don't really have words for how this actually makes me feel because it's just. Yeah. The most open and clear declaration of love and respect and admiration one could ever make. TO ME.

[cctinsleybaxter]

2023 in Books

I need to stop bragging that I’ve got this reading thing all figured out, because man if 2023 wasn’t a year of terrible books. I liked less than half of the 37 I read and nothing quite gripped me in the way it has in years past… but to put it more optimistically I liked a full third of what I read, and the ones I liked best were a fascinating and unexpected silver lining. Without further ado:

Cyrano de Bergerac by Edmond Rostand, trans. Brian Hooker

Tell this all to the world- and then to me. Say very softly that… she loves you not.

I read a couple of plays this year for the first time since college and liked them fine, but there’s a reason this has been adapted five million times. Everyone go watch Megamind right now.

Wylding Hall by Elizabeth Hand

Of all the found footage-inspired horror fiction I’ve read this one makes the best case for existing in its chosen medium, as a 70s UK folk rock band are interviewed about the summer they spent recording what would become their final album [thunder crashes.] It reminded me of a Tana French mystery in its language and ability to make space feel lived-in; the character writing is so strong I realized that at some point I had stopped checking the interview headings to know who was speaking. Hand unfortunately distrusts her audience to read between the lines at a few crucial moments (and ruins what would have been a perfect ending and a deeply affecting scare by gilding the lily, or, in this case, photograph), but I love that she went from seemingly by-the-numbers American YA fiction to a meticulously-researched and truly unique horror novella. Puts other writers working in the genre to shame.

A Kiss Before Dying by Ira Levin

Reminiscent of the best kind of TCM suspense thriller (and was adapted into one), but could only exist as a book for the kind of narrative tactics it employs. Levin is brilliant at setting and character; I think any one of his contemporaries would have leaned into archetypes for this sort of story, and he instead distinguishes his proper nouns in subtle, clever ways that lend them the weight a noir needs. Can’t wait to read more of his stuff!

All the Names They Used for God by Anjali Sachdeva

I’d like to know why this anthology got hit with what a friend has termed a pottery barn throw pillow cover + a ‘the tiny things we know to be small’ title, because the eponymous story isn’t even called that! It’s just The Names They Used for God, and is, appropriately, about two women kidnapped by a religious extremist group. High risk-high reward; I think taken at their base premise the stories could have been insufferable and are instead strange, compelling, and fantastical. There’s a methodicalness and, I don't know, lack of whimsy? to them that’s unusual for fantasy, but also an absence of any one goal or moral in the way Le Guin speaks so highly of. It made me feel the way I did reading and adoring Kelly Link in middle school, and Sachdeva has a much different style that I guess works all the better on adults. My favorite was Robert Greenman and the Mermaid.

Seabiscuit: An American Legend by Lauren Hillenbrand

Someone recommended this to me via Tumblr anon over five years ago, so let me start by saying if that was you I’d like to thank you properly! This book rules! It was written in ‘99 so falls prey to a very specific kind of jingoism, but the mechanics of that are interesting in and of themself. Seabiscuit the animal is a lens through which to view turn-of-the-20th-century America written from the precipice of the 21st; his story told through the expertly-researched biographies of his owner, trainer, and jockey. Hillenbrand is not only a good pop nonfiction historian, but has been a sports writer since the 80s and I never imagined the genre could be so thrilling as I did reading her work. Horse racing is insane and no one should be riding these things btw.

The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton

It was one of the great livery-stableman’s most masterly intuitions to have discovered that Americans want to get away from amusement even more quickly than they want to get to it.

Wharton came from old money New York*, was deeply disillusioned with it and pined for rational (i.e., even more insane) social and political scenes, had myriad thoughts about women and gender relations, and held a love for interior design. I learned all of this after reading but it’s apparent on every page; deeply funny and perceptive, fantastic use of language, the moments where it lost me completely nothing if not interesting. What sticks with me the most are a flair for the operatic and an ability to voice both the feeling and consequences of losing oneself to imagined scenarios. Read the pink parasol scene.

*Ancient Money New York; the saying ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ is apocryphally attributed to her father’s side of the family

Owls of the Eastern Ice: A Quest to Find and Save the World's Largest Owl by Jonathan S. Slaght

We’d return to our camp to huddle in the freezing tent and wait for our owls in silence, like suitors agonizing over a phone that never rings.

One of the better pieces of science writing I’ve read in a long time, as Slaght frames rural communities as a quintessential part of ecology rather than a barrier to it. His style is amiable and matter-of-fact (sometimes overly so; the amount of metric GIS directions, help), but he's super engaging and clearly holds just as much compassion for people and history as he does animals and natural landscapes. The Blakiston’s fish owls he’s studying are described as unreal, with hoots so low and quiet it sounds like someone has thrown them under a blanket. You can listen to them here.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

Took my breath away and surprised me in a way a book hasn’t in years. I'd read Clarke’s 2004 novel when I was maybe fourteen and had vaguely positive but mostly neutral memories of it, and Piranesi being sci-fi-fantasy that came recommended by Tiktok had me very dubious. I ended up devouring it in the way I haven’t read books since I was fourteen; more of a mystery than the suspected high fantasy, with characters I would do disservice to in trying to describe in brief. While the mystery isn’t difficult to ‘solve’ (I’d argue the book also skews young!), the story ends in a way that’s both deeply unexpected and in the only way it could have.

Honorable mentions

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas, trans. Peter Washington

[Jigsaw voice] Every man has a devouring passion in his heart as every fruit has its worm.

I spent so much time running my mouth about this one on Tumblr there’s really not much left to say. I think it’s a work of genius that was physically exhausting to read, and I’m sticking it with the honorable mentions mostly because I remember The Three Musketeers being the better book. If you want to read Dumas- and you should- start with that one.

Jonny Appleseed by Joshua Whitehead

I would’ve liked this more had I read it in my late teens/early 20s, but I still think it’s pretty good and would absolutely recommend to anyone in that age bracket. Things that normally annoy me about philosophical first-person lit fic didn’t matter under the weight of Jon’s narratorial voice. He reminded me a little of Lynda Barry’s Maybonne in his understanding and depictions of community and family; his stream of consciousness letting contradictions sit rather than trying to explain them away (Whitehead also makes sex very prosaic and pretty-sounding while still being frank and gross about it, which is a rare talent!)

The Seeds of Life: From Aristotle to da Vinci, from Sharks' Teeth to Frogs' Pants, the Long and Strange Quest to Discover Where Babies Come From by Edward Dolnik

This one fell in the rankings because the writing isn’t my favorite (think early days Vulture article rather than NYT), but I cannot stop referencing it in conversation. I want to read the whole thing to people and make them understand how truly unfathomable it is not only that every one of us is the product of 1 sperm and 1 egg, but that anyone ever figured out how that process works. When Western Europeans first started using microscopes they studied water; there were gross little bugs in there to watch and enjoy, so when semen was revealed to have its own bugs no one was shocked, but they also weren’t impressed. We would not see one enter an egg until EIGHTEEN SEVENTY-FIVE.  

Killer Dolphin by Ngaio Marsh

The Malaise of First Night Nerves had gripped Peregrine, not tragically and aesthetically by the throat but, as is its habit, shamefully in the guts.

Has made it into my top 5 favorite Inspector Alleyn mysteries. I’m not keen on Marsh’s theater settings (and there are a LOT of them), but a convoluted setup made this one all the more rewarding. The final revelation as to a point of blackmail is visceral and bizarre in a way I haven’t seen from her before.

The Wretched of the Earth by Frantz Fanon

We all have dirty hands; we are all soiling them in the swamps of our country and in the terrifying emptiness of our brains. Every onlooker is either a coward or a traitor.

Best read in conversation with other writers, I wouldn’t recommend Fanon as the end-all-be-all introduction to communist and socialist thinking (the fact that he inadvertently describes what was going wrong with the USSR at time of writing is fascinating), but he explicitly invites that conversation and the value and impact of his work really can’t be overstated. Our points of disagreement tend to be in regard to nationalism, not his condonation of violence.

Persuasion by Jane Austen

Fascinating to see how Austen was thinking about relationships near the end of her short life. I laughed to see the idea of preferring your brother-in-law’s family to your own was back in full force from my own favorite Emma, as well as an eleventh-hour ‘maybe I should ship the villains??’ My biggest issue is that, like Emma, Persuasion is written in third person limited narration, but Anne is fundamentally Good™ so doesn’t need to learn anything about herself or the world; critic Bob Irvine points out that she and her dashing, misogynistic sailor are beset rather than changed by it. That said I love a people being beset by people (concussed temptresses) places (Bath) and things (cars), and Austen's writing style is really firing on all cylinders here.

[theyluvkarolina]

ferraris DID work their asses off!!!! leclerc tbh also deserved driver of the day in my eyes both him and lando should have won it 🥰🥰 he did so well w his tyre management and he looked so happy post race which is such a stark contrast to how he usually looks ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 but omg i had the biggest laugh of the week when max told leclerc that there was a 22 sec gap between him and lando 😭😭 the absolute despair on charles face was INSANEEE...sainz overtake game was ITTTTTT!!! and from p9 to p5 is pretty great! he grilled checo and ate his livery for dinner...love to see it!

checo is honestly not even worth it atp...somebody like alonso who genuinely knows how to race even in a shit car or someone completely new to the scene like lawson would do better than him atp...its just become embarassing to see him and mv1 have the same car yet have 5-9 places between them consistently. leclerc and sainz usually have 2-3 if not just 1 between them and they have such diff driving styles and their shit livery and yet they consistently outperform him in one way or another. even ls2 has done better lap times and crashed less in races than checo....a fucking rookie that was put in f1 too early outperforming u is humiliating. God forgive me for possibly jinxing them, but i think the incoming rookies (doohan, bearman, and antonelli if all goes well in monza next wk) will outdo him in under 10 races next season. its just unbearable to watch. great guy, mid driver at best!

mclaren dominance boring fans...whats new!!! norris is proving to be a better driver than ppl want to admit (esp now that he didnt fucking throw away a pole) and got 2 wins in a single season...ppl can say its the livery but checo has great livery and look at him 🤷‍♀️. not to mention how piastri has got to be one of this centurys most impressive rookies...srsly up there w hamilton and verstappen for me. his 4th place ending was pretty damn good considering how tough the top 5 competition was 🤭 oscar has the potential to be wdc and if ppl paid less attention to shitting on mv1, ln4, or talking shit about next yrs lineups and breaking news they would realize what a damn good generational talent we have on the grid rn!!!

all that shit talk abt the gap is so funny....admit u hate to see a team have good drivers AND livery! f1 fans will never b satisfied i swear 🤓🤓

(why was this rant so long omg 😭😭 guess i really did love this race wkend)

HARD AGREE. I’m so proud of the Ferrari boys. I just know taking that Ferrari is hard. But then I remembered Williams 😓😓

2. NO BECAUSE LOGAN OUT QUALIFYING CHECO MULTIPLE TIMES IN A FUCKING WILLIAMS IS CRAZY (ALONG WITH HOW MUCH EXPERIENCE CHECO HAS). I do think the rookies next year will bring in a good show and I can’t wait for that.

3. I will say it once and I’ll say it again. When it comes to Max and he gives his opinions, it’s funny because it’s “Mad Max” but once it’s Lando it’s him being a baby. This isn’t hate to Max AT ALL (i really do love him) but the double standard is quite insane to me. It just seems to me that Red Bull fans aren’t ready to let go and see the aren’t the top car this season.

4. OSCAR DEFINITELY HAS WDC POTENTIAL. He’s already been doing fantastic in just his second season. If i ever see him lift the WDC trophy, just know I will be sobbing. With the other rookies, They will perform good. I already know it.

5. YES YES YES. NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS F1 FANS ARE NEVER SATISFIED. Whether it’s the fact we finally have a new race to the WDC, how a car is doing, or even the lineups. I’ve just decided to stay away from other F1 fans that aren’t from tumblr for this reason 😭😭 (ESPECIALLY INSTAGRAM. THE COMMENTS MAKE ME WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT)

ITS OKAY I LOVE A LITTLE YAP SESSION 🩷🩷 ITS SO FUN TO UNDERSTAND OPINIONS FROM OTHER PEOPLE 🥹

[racingliners]

F1 Re-Watch 2013: Round 3 - China

I am FINALLY picking up my 2013 watch through again. This was always going to be a chilled out thing but just have no had the headspace lately bc of various life things constantly kicking me in the teeth 😭

Anyhow, despite still being early on in the season we’re already nearing the end of races I haven’t seen at all, but I obvs still know the main bits of what happened (Fernando winning, Seb and Lewis battling for P3). So, let’s finally jump in!

gonna say it again, the old F1 intro my beloved

also also this was the first race post Multi-21 (I did start this re-watch out of order, if you’re wondering why Malaysia is the first post in my tag) so I assume we’re going to get some spicy comms (or an attempt, since it’s Crofty and Brundle)

also also also, I legit miss Shanghai on the calendar. Maybe it’s nostalgia, but we had some really good races there, it’s a really good track.

aaaaand starting grid: Lewis on pole, Fernando in 3rd, Dan in 7th in a Toro Rosso, Jense in 8th Seb down in 9th... Jev in 15th 😭

(god it feels SO WIERD seeing Rosberg on the grid as a driver, does not compute)

lol Webber starting from the pits bc he ran out of fuel in quali.

oh, this was Lewis’ first pole for Merc 🥹🖤

[Formation Lap]: Helmet watch: I loved how Lewis’ yellow helmet with the red and green accents had a blue, green and amber multichrome visor to match. (Yes these are the important things that we discuss here at racingliners.tumblr.com)

Just F1 culture things: the mad dash of mechanics and engineers running from the grid to the garages.

“Whatever way round it was it was still a [Red Bull] 1-2 in Malaysia” oh we are getting some spicy comms after all 

Helmet watch 2: Seb’s red helmet is v pretty

[Start/Lap 1]: Lewis having a v zoomy start, we love to see it

While Raikkonen got dropped by both Ferraris

Meanwhile cars going three wide in the midfield bc insanity

oh no Force India on Force India violence at the last corner

[Lap 2]: Webber makes his first stop, inch resting

Man, the ever constant of Lewis and Fernando racing against each other

[Lap 3]: Lewis 8 tenths up on Fernando we love to see it

Livery watch: of the many iterations Team Enstone have raced under, the black and gold Lotus livery is very much one of my favourites (Pink Alpine will always be superior though)

[Lap 4]: damn Fernando really caught up with DRS

Seb finally making moves and passes Dan for 8th

[Lap 5]: ...not both Ferrari’s getting past Lewis on the main straight. what the DRS

meanwhile Seb got past Jenson, and passes Rosberg at the hairpin for 7th

[Lap 6]: and one of the Force India’s has a broken rear wing, and Mercedes just did a double stack

This race went from 0 to 100 very quickly

oh shit the Force India’s brakes are now on fire

Team Silverstone’s no good very bad Chinese GP

oh no it was Gutierrez who just ploughed into the back of him. whoops.

[Lap 7]: Alonso pits

I am barely paying attention to tyre compounds with all the demolition derby shit going on

aaaaand Lewis back to being the fastest on track. noice.

cut to Jev v Bottas for P11. ngl it’s very wild watching these races back knowing how some of these guys careers have unfolded a decade later.

(Jev’s a double FE World Champion, so fuck you Marko)

ahem back to racing

also hi Pastor Maldonado

[Lap 8]: Oh my god Hulkenberg is leading the race after all the pit stops and carnage what the fuck

but more importantly Seb P2 and Jenson P3 🥰

in reality Alonso is the net race leader bc everyone in front of him is yet to stop I’m just living in delusion

[Lap 9]: whoops some drivers allegedly used DRS in a yellow flag zone, that was silly

[Lap 10]: ngl, I really miss it when we had a legit mix of possible strategies (in this case a 2-stop vs a 3-stop). Pirelli make better tyres challenge

[Lap 11]: What is a polar bear (Di Resta) doing in Arlington, Texas?! (5th place).

Good for you though Team Silverstone I love you Team Silverstone

Livery watch: the glossy metallic blue with purple accents rbr I MISS YOU

[Lap 12]: of rip not Fernando being 1.6 seconds faster than Seb on his new tyres 😭

anyway now I’m finally paying attention, the soft and mediums were the tyre compounds for this race

[Lap 13]: Seb and Rocky team radio interactions my beloved 🥰

[Lap 14]: How the fuck is Hulkenberg still leading????

Meanwhile Alonso is just cutting through the field like butter fvhaeudhu. He’s up to 4th

[Lap 15]: lol rbr pitted Seb to get him out of Hulkenberg’s dirty air and he pits anyway

but Seb jumps him in the pits!

the devil works hard but RBR mechanics work harder

NOOOOO WEBBER CRASHED INTO JEV

back to back races of Red Bull on Red Bull violence. oof

“How does the car feel?” “Not too bad” HIS FRONT WING HAS BEEN SHREDDED

[Lap 16]: oh not Raikkonen going into the back of Perez

both incidents happened at turn 6, what was in the water in the lake in the paddock?

aaaand cut to a slow moving Webber (and a depressed looking Adrian Newey)

[Lap 17]: Oh shit there goes Webber’s right rear tyre, just... rolling across the track

[Lap 18]: Meanwhile, Jenson is in first so I think we should just stop the race and call it a day

There has been SO MUCH GOING ON

[Lap 19]: “Should they remove the car? It’s not on the racing line” My lord jesus christ IT’S ON THE TRACK CROFTY

Obviously you can’t see me as I’m typing this but I’m looking into the camera like I’m on the office

They haven’t moved the tyre either it’s just sat on the grass run off, that is NOT SAFE MY DUDES

[Lap 20]: Meanwhile Massa and Rosberg pit again

And Seb up into P5 🥰

“Button leads the race” STOP THE COUNT

“Alonso catching Button but he cannot pass him... Jenson Button doing a fine fine job” I love this song

[Lap 21]: ...nvm Fernando took the lead going into turn 1

It was wonderful while it lasted, considering the 2013 McLaren car was painfully average

Rosberg pits again???? I wondered why they cut to a bemused looking Merc pit wall

[Lap 22]: The synchronised Merc and Lotus pit stops *chef’s kiss*

Lewis comes out in 9th but considering the massive pace difference between old and new tyres he should be back on the top 5 pretty soon

[Lap 23]: oop Rosberg retires with a mechanical fault

mild shock, I just about understood when Jenson said over the radio. He didn’t sound like static for once

and Lewis overtakes Dan for 7th

[Lap 24]: Jenson pits for his first stop, and Fernando for his second

...Jenson and Grosjean under investigation for using DRS in a yellow flag zone 🤦‍♀️

Braincells boys, braincells

[Lap 25]: anyway hiiiii Bono

Just Lewis things: collecting fastest laps like pokemon

[Lap 26]: And Fernando moved into P2.

...and now he chases down Seb

man this race is just peak 2010′s F1. Fernando racing Seb and Lewis, Lewis chasing down Jenson (and Jenson’s car not being completely shit for once). Raikkonen just vibing and somehow being faster after he got a broken front wing and nosecone

also while I haven’t had my obligatory “TEEEEED” reaction, he is in the pitlane living his best life.

[Lap 29]: And Lewis passes Jenson on the main straight.

and we have passed half distance!

[Lap 30]: And Fernando takes the lead

“It’s Alonso, Hamilton and Raikkonen for the top 3″ damn Brundle’s third eye was wide open (spoiler alert, that’s our podium just with Lewis and Kimi swapped round)

[Lap 31]: that is a very tragic sight of Raikkonen passing Jenson with his very broken nosecone

[Lap 32]: Seb makes his second stop, but he still has to run the softs

and he’s already moving back up into 6th place

[Lap 33]: ...and now into P5

He is zooming 

[Lap 34]: Oh the old tyre strategy graphic!! I did not know I missed it until I saw it, it’s way easier to follow all the different strategies if they just have all the tyres drivers have ran thus far on screen 😅

[Lap 35]: Not Seb being 2 and a bit seconds faster than Jenson 😭 (a combo of 2 stop vs 3 stop, and it being the 2013 RBR vs the 2013 McLaren)

[Lap 36]: and unsurprisingly Seb passes Jenson for 3rd

The current race order being Fernando, Lewis, Seb, Jenson and Raikkonen

[Lap 38]: And Lewis makes what I think is his final stop

He comes out in 6th, behind Ricciardo

[Lap 39]: So Fernando has to stop again, but he has a decent gap over everyone else. Seb and Jenson who also have to stop again less so

“What’s the situation in the race?!” Ted is me and I am Ted. mainly because I started this after 10pm my time

Lewis once again collecting the fastest lap. Purple really is his colour.

‘Use of DRS in yellow flag zones for cars 1, 2, 7, 17, 19 and 23 will be investigated after the race’ I had to pause bc I couldn’t stop laughing.

That’s an awful lot of paperwork, the stewards are booked and busy bc Jenson and Jev were already on that list

so about a third of the grid potentially doing something very unavoidable. F1 is a Serious Sport™️

[Lap 42]: Anyway, Fernando makes his final stop, and only comes out in 2nd behind Seb.

[Lap 43]: And he once again passes Seb going into turn 1, so just second and third to sort out.

[Lap 44]: Raikkonen passes Jenson for 3rd at the last corner

[Lap 45]: ...and Lewis passes Jenson for 4th a few corners after

seeing your fave driver go from 3rd to 5th vs seeing your other favourite driver get into 4th

[Lap 46]: 10 laps to go

[Lap 47]: “No need to push” “I’m not pushing” Fastest Lap: Fernando Alonso. rguheuraghu

Fernando Alonso certified menace to society

[Lap 48]: Seb (2nd) and Jenson (5th) still haven’t stopped yet, so they’re either leaving it as late as possible, or going to try extending to a two stop. 

[Lap 49]: ah nvm Jenson’s race engineer said they were doing one more lap before stopping 😅

also YIKES the soft tyres sucked that much this race if they only want to do 7 laps on it

[Lap 50]: and Jenson finally pits for the soft tyre, he comes out in 7th place

[Lap 51]: Jenson passes Massa for 6th 

and he’s setting purple sectors 🥰

[Lap 52]: Seb makes his third stop for softs, he comes out in 4th

*5 Laps remaining klaxon*

and apparently Jenson’s tyres are already dying 😭

Pirelli you can and will meet my fists

[Lap 53]: meanwhile Lewis is close to Raikkonen, but not close enough to try a pass

[Lap 54]: ✨Seb fastest lap✨

and Di Resta pits which promotes Jenson to 5th

oh jeez the amount of marbles off the racing line, they could legit make a whole set of tyres, the track is literally black where they’ve all gathered

[Lap 55]: Seb closing in on Lewis at a huge rate of knots

last lap spice you say? 👀

[Lap 56]: the gap has gone from 5.2 seconds to 2.0 seconds in about two laps. whew.

A Lewis and Seb battle is the superior battle, you cannot change my mind

although Lewis is caught up in a train of traffic, which is allowing Seb to catch up even more.

[Finish]: Fernando wins, can we cut to Lewis and Seb please

MASSIVE LOCK UP FROM LEWIS

oh jeeeeeez it was a drag race to the line and I think Lewis got him by a front wing end plate. WHEW.

Final Top 5: Alonso, Raikkonen, Lewis, Seb, Jenson

Oh jeez that race was actually really decent! Normally I hate strategy races BUT in this case it made things genuinely interesting bc there was a good split of drivers using the 2-stop or 3-stop, and most importantly it gave us some decent battles and made the results somewhat unpredictable! And the last lap chase of Lewis v Seb was SO GOOD. It literally wasn’t over until the last lap, and it being between Lewis and Seb was just even better, and podium or not Seb had such a great comeback drive from what I think was a brake issue in quali the day before. And that’s before you get into all the stuff going on at the start... WHEW.

Easy 8 out of 10 race, next one is Bahrain!

[monstersandmaw]

Embers - male dragon shifter x reader) Part Two (sfw)

(this is supposed to be going up every Friday, but I was a dumbo yesterday and forgot, so here it is, a day late and with my apologies!)

Here's Chapter Two for you, in which we find out our dragon shifter’s name (pronunciation at the end if you’re curious). And Frankie speaks with a heavy Welsh accent.

I was trying to keep each chapter to under 1000 words, but that didn't work out so well for this one. It's nearly 2000 words. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!!

A phone call from a number you didn’t recognise interrupted your quiet Friday evening, and you answered with some trepidation. Usually it was marketing calls at this hour, and nothing was guaranteed to make you lose your shit quicker than someone phoning up to sell you double glazing or, even worse, to try and scam you out of your life savings.

This time, however, a bright and bubbly voice with a lilting accent asked, “Hiya, I hope I’m not calling at a bad time, but you gave my friend your number in the hopes of finding a flute teacher?”

“Oh my god!” you blurted, nearly dropping the phone. “Yes! I didn’t think he’d actually pass it on. Thanks for calling.”

The laugh that trilled out of the person on the other end was more like a bleating giggle, and it was then that you remembered that the teacher was a faun. “No problem! My name is Frankie, by the way, and I’ve actually got space to take on a new pupil at the moment. If I got it straight it’s your niece?”

“Yeah, she’s six.”

“Ok, if you could maybe tell me a bit about her and what level she’s at, that might help me plan a bit, but we could set up a trial lesson - free of charge - and go from there?”

“Perfect. As for her level, she’s brand new. She’s wanted to play the flute for a long time, but she’s only six and my brother couldn’t really afford lessons until now.” As a single father, a widower, your brother did his absolute best for his little girl, and with no kids of your own, you stepped in to help quite a lot. “She’s bright and a quick learner, though she’s not particularly verbal. She’s always been drawn to music though; I think it’s a half-siren thing…”

“Yeah, that’ll be it!” he chuckled. “As long as she’s going to listen to me, that’s a good place to start from; I don’t need her to recite the Trollbridge Common Dictionary as well. I teach up at Mikaeïl’s house - he lets me use the music room free of charge.”

You frowned in confusion. “Mikaeïl?”

“The red-headed, starched-shirt-wearing, giant nerd-bag you met in the coffee shop,” he grinned and you snorted your tea nearly out of your nose.

“Oh my god.”

“Right? I mean, Kaeïl is an absolute marshmallow on the inside, I promise, but he comes across as a complete arsehole, doesn’t he? Anyway, back to the flute lessons. You let me know some dates when she’ll be free to come over, I’ll give you the address, and we can see how we get along. Texting is better for me as I’m usually teaching during the day.”

“Sounds good,” you said, and began to arrange the rest with Frankie.

Afterwards you did a quick internet search and found him easily enough. He was apparently well known, both as a teacher and a soloist, and he and the quintet did a number of local concerts too. You couldn’t resist zooming in on a few photos which also had Mikaeïl in. God, he had amazing bone structure, but he definitely had one severe case of resting bitch-face for sure. He wasn’t smiling in any of the photos and he looked severe, and untouchable as a hot coal.

Satisfied that Frankie was the genuine article, you called your brother and fixed a date to take her to the address Frankie had given you.

The next Friday, you picked Celia up from school while her dad took the night shift at work. The hours weren’t great, but it meant he got slightly better pay. Plus it meant that you got to have Celia for the night, and that was always fun. She was intelligent and creative, if quiet, and after dinner the two of you usually watched a film together or read if she didn’t feel like watching anything. You knew she missed her siren mother dearly, and her death had almost destroyed your brother. You and he were all the family she had now; her own grandparents had wanted nothing to do with a half-breed human.

You found Mikaeïl’s place easily enough, and as the enormous gates swung open for you, drove your rather shoddy car along the mile-long gravel driveway through gorgeous parkland and up to a frankly ridiculous mansion on the outskirts of Old Trollbridge. You barely restrained yourself from cursing out loud. The place was insanely beautiful.

Celia had her hands pressed up against the car windows, mouth open. “My teacher lives here?” she asked.

“It’s the house of his friend,” you said, trying to sound unfazed and unaffected by the grandeur. Mikaeïl must be a very wealthy person indeed.

You parked up outside and Celia hopped out, piercing eyes gazing up at the warm, sandstone facade of the building with its many sash windows and ornate architectural details. Her dusky brown wings - small for a siren her age, but then again she was only half-siren - were flexed slightly, as though she planned on flapping up to get a closer look at the carvings above the door, but you took her hand before the thought got any further, and led her to the front door, her brand new flute in your other hand.

It took a while for someone to come to the door, but when it was answered, you were surprised to find that it wasn’t some servant or butler in fancy livery, but it was Mikaeïl himself. You recognised him instantly, and he looked at you from behind his circular, gold-rimmed glasses with the same, piercing gold eyes. Despite the colour, they were cold and unsmiling. Beside him, in complete contrast in every way, stood a very short, slightly stocky figure with the white, woolly lower half of a satyr. He wore a thick, dark green, knitted jumper despite the warmth of the day, and he had massively thick, curling horns that coiled around his ovine ears. His curly hair was cut relatively short, and matched his white legs in colour.

He extended a hand to you as Mikaeïl stepped back silently and disappeared into the shadows, and he bleated, “Hi! I’m Frankie. And you must be Celia,” he added, turning his dark eyes to her. “Nice to meet you. Would you like to come in?”

She nodded shyly, and you ushered her inside in front of you. Frankie’s big cloven hooves clopped loudly on the marble entrance hall, and Celia gasped as she took in the beautiful, sweeping staircase that curled up the cylindrical walls of the drum-like entrance hall that was capped with a coffered dome.

“It’s quite something, isn't it?” Frankie said conspiratorially to her, and she nodded again. “Come on, let me show you guys the music room. It’s got the loveliest piano. This way.”

Mikaeïl had all but vanished.

Nattering constantly, Frankie led you away down a light, airy corridor with gold and cream silk wall hangings and 18th century landscape paintings on one side and a gallery of windows overlooking the gravel driveway on the other, and into an equally beautiful space. Somehow, despite the obvious wealth, the music room was tasteful and bizarrely modest. Yes, that was an original Steinway, and yes, there was a crystal chandelier - relatively small, but still - in the centre of the moulded-plaster ceiling, but the huge windows looked out onto a private terrace and parkland beyond, and it had the feeling of a well-used, well-loved, functional room.

Celia was utterly entranced. Her wide eyes took it all in and you stood there dumbstruck as well.

Eventually, however, you both got over it, and Frankie brought over a very ordinary, metal music stand and parked his behind on the piano stool with a grunt. “Right,” he grinned and she giggled slightly. “Let’s see what we’ve got here.” He pulled out his own flute from its case and showed her how to align the sections of her own correctly.

You sat at one side of the room, but you realised quickly that Celia kept looking over to you before she spoke, so you said, “Celia, I think you might learn better if I wait outside. How would that be?”

She nodded and you knew her well enough to see that she wasn’t worried, and Frankie shot you a smile and a nod. “We’ll be about another half an hour,” he said quietly.

With that, you left, and wandered up the corridor and back into the entrance hall.

You took your time in the corridor, admiring the paintings, and you were just looking up at the ceiling of the entrance hall again, marvelling at the artistry of the whole thing, when someone cleared their throat pointedly from the doorway to your left and you jumped.

“Can I help you?”

It was Mikaeïl. He was dressed in a smart shirt, with a black waistcoat and black trousers today, and his long red hair was tied back in a smooth ponytail that fell halfway down his back. His horns glinted in the low light, looking more like strangely-carved precious gems, flecked with gold, than keratin, and his eyes reflected oddly, like cat’s eyes in the dark.

“I…” you faltered. “I thought it best if I left them to it…” you said stupidly. He seemed to have the effect of draining your IQ to zero with just one look.

“So you took the liberty of roaming the halls of my home instead?” he said in a cold drawl.

“I… I’m not poking around,” you countered hotly, finding your words coming back to you. “I’ve only walked along the corridor!”

A tiny smile twitched at the corner of his lips. “Would you like something to drink?”

His polite question caught you off guard, and you gave him a blank look. “I thought you were going to have your gamekeeper shoot me for trespassing…” you said dryly.

Mikaeïl barked a harsh but amused laugh, the rigid lines of his body softening just a fraction. “Not yet at least,” he said and turned his back on you.

Assuming you were meant to follow, you did. 

Part Three

—

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It’s pronounced ‘mick-eye-ill’ :)

[ryo-hirakawa]

thoughts on 4h le castellet 2022:

omg tjimen on pole??

iron dames starting p3 in class hell yeah

yifei didn't get a qualy time 🤕

LETS GO

lollo balling with that off track overtake for the lead. he gave it back ofc

the lmp2s starting last already in the gte midpack? and i didn't get to see it?

yellow flag 2 min in good job everybody

the lmp2s starting last already in the lmp3 midpack? and i still didn't get to see it??

ok guys can we fcy this

oh safety car

car 3 in the pits

was lollo meant to give the place back to both tjimen and phil or just tjimen. hm.

car 69 dangling from that crane thingy makes me anxious

green flaggg

ah no tjimen's gone wide

car 14 drive through pen

sarah for the gte lead woo!!!

not car 3 pitting when the pit lane was closed?? tears??

car 66 under investigation too?

car 10 spins

everything happens so much

how did that red car go from first to fifth

lollo and tjimen racing each other in f3 and now in elms makes me kinda fond. the kids are growing up

ouch car 15

safety car again

yifei from p40 to p13 so true

the guy at inter europol eating (guilherme oliveira) sends me

safety car asked to go faster lmao

green flag again lets go

3+2 wide they're insane

gtes and lmp3s mixing this is so dizzying

fassbender spun from third now he gotta pit

the commentator lmao... they're not pros but much quicker than i am

what kind of name is "spirit of race" that reads like a poor fanfic

phil in the pits?? did tjimen pit as well bc lollo is first

CAR 22 PIT STOP GOT FUCKED UP

lollo staying out....strat masterclass incoming?

they're running on sustainable fuel? that's nice i hope it gets introduced to more series

yifei third king shit

car 27 off

good god those tyre ribbons

safety car again...third in an hour godbless

"cool racing"? really?

why. why is there a yellow flag

at this point i can no longer keep up with which cars had trouble lol

car 17 drive through for track limits lmaooo

YIFEI UR SO SEXYYYY

fcy time

some guy filled his race car with diesel instead of petrol and now they won't let him live it down. hilarious

we’re green and ferdi’s in car 9 in the lead

i didn’t even realise car 31 was pro-am. tjimen’s done well to keep it so far ahead

not the comms making fun of ferdi’s longass royal name. tears

lollo interview!

he’s wearing juan’s racesuit 😭

jack fastest so true

the pit crew pissed at the cameraman for getting in the way dfgsbbdgh

jack truly making moves once he hops in car 34

a ferrari driving a porsche this is so fucking funny

oh dear that’s no good for car 37

the top 4 pitting as the race classification pops up. pls

sarah on the longest stint ever fr

comms wtf do you mean bent’s gonna try dovetailing elms and f2. what do you know.

not chat asking comms if there will be an anime car livery. priorities straight.

some guy proposed to this lady called kate im

track limits strike again this time for car 6

“reversed his decision to retire” so another alonso

ah no seb alvarez went off into the gravel

fcy again

uh oh bottom plank on the loose. a car might be dsqed.

kate said yes lmao thanks for the update comms

interesting strats from car 19...

we are green hurrah

why is there an lmp2 in 32nd place rip

happy 100 laps! (for louis at least)

also nico lapierre and yifei sharing a car is such an unexpected crossover but i love it

ayo pietro is here too? somehow missed him when going through the entry list

they changed only the front left tyre on the 37??

“luck is preparation plus opportunity” wise words memo

leaders pitting :fear:

p4 to p7 scrapping like mad

car 19 really went for an interesting choice with 2 silver drivers ngl. its not your usual lmp2 lineup

but they might just have pulled off a strat/petrol saving masterclass here

i miss when car 83 was first in gte :(

YOOO this IS a strat masterclass from car 19 what a perfectly timed pit stop

“young dutchman and not quite young dutchman anymore” damn they killed job

job’s literally only 23 💀 now i feel old...

THE AGE GAP BETWEEN BENT AND JOB IS NINE MONTHS. TEARS

iron lynx changing drivers now?? with 12 min to go??

ah man safety cars and fcys fucked their strat. disasterclass i fear

SPLASH AND DASH TIME

these always drive me insane

it’s been almost 4h but i haven’t figured out which lmp2s are pro-am

last lap!!

so 1 more lap for gtes and 1 and a half more laps for lmp3s...i love confusion

ferdi cam :) congrats prema now time for the rest of these folks

omg car 17 got 13?? gtes fighting too

car 32 holds out to win it by half a car length!!

was that ralf? hi ralf he’s everywhere these days isn’t he

a pity for car 13 esp after leading this long but insane stuff from car 17 and jakobsen they were gaining so much and then took off after the overtake too

YESSS WE GET FERDI AND LOLLO CLIMBING ONTO THE CAR

nicolas was in hospital 3 days ago?? and now he’s won a race! omg i’m so proud of him

THERE IS A SINGAPOREAN IN CAR 66???

car 17 stopped after taking the flag good god if they get dsqed due to lack of fuel...i would d word if i was jakobsen

ah okay it got going again

jakobsen is only 18! he’s impressed me now can they show me how to spell his first name

nicolas looks like he’s gonna cry he’s so happy

omg his teammates crashed the interview they’re so cute...car 32 i like you

louis has won the first race for a debuting elms team twice!

sophia’s taller than bent

ferdi’s jump bsfdgfkgh

HELP DID ONE OF THE CAR 65 GUYS’ CHAMPAGNE JUST EXPLODE

aw bent passed them their extra bottle

they cut off the italian anthem before the little crescendo boo. loved it anyway

nice to know car 31 still gets a trophy after that pole and opening stint

jack gets a win!! also turkish anthem is kind of a bop

wait pro-am doesn’t get points for pole but wasn’t 31 the pole sitters for both standard and pro-am lmp2 entries

why does car 32 have mismatched suits they’re so quirky this sends me

i see paul ricard bucket hats in the audience i want one

rinaldi racing are germans dressed as italians lmao

ehret fled the champagne plsss

teammates jumpscaring interviews i could get used to this

car 17 are so selfie obsessed also malthe just has a bunch of dads

they had a whole ass drive through penalty and won it. mad

michelin man!

i loved this race i might gif some moments if i get the time