#goofy cod tings

[montcumbry-gaytor]

something funny my sister brought to my attention some time ago needs to be brought to everyone's attention because I think it is hilarious

just as a fair warning what's below has SPOILERS and read at your own desire

in call of duty : cold war ( my favorite game ) you get to name the character you play as ( bell ) and it's later revealed that what you've built your character on, isn't even it's real identity, and it's shown that the identity you've given bell, is what Adler and Park gave bell.

Which, is where the funny part comes in, because before I played cold war I was playing super smash bros, and I like playing Kirby, and I play dark Kirby.

so I called Kirby "kroby"

WELL

in a fit of worry on what to name my character, I dubbed bell "Kroby 'Bell' Johnson"

thinking nothing would come of it.

well a few weeks ago I'm still talking about cold war and my sister mentions the best thing she can, and that is

Kroby isn't my bells name, but it's what two, grown people in the military named another grown man working in the Soviet union.

Adler and Park in my bells universe named him ( like geniuses ) Kroby.

I find that fucking hilarious, and I think that makes the fact that he's an oc with a romance with Adler even better.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 4 February 1954

Another two-song week, and we've got a first, possibly - the first song that I think just about everyone could sing at least one line from, regardless of where they're from. I could be wrong about that, of course, or overlooking something we've already heard. But this first song is definitely huge and still well known - though our other contender certainly has an interesting title...

That's Amore - Dean Martin (peaked at No. 2)

This is a big, cheesy slice of pizza quatro formaggio, or possibly a dish of steaming lasagna, but I really like it. Sorry, if you wanted me to have a more sophisticated opinion, it's just warm and sappy, and I love it. It's since become Dean Martin's signature song, and I can't object to that at all.

It was written for a film, The Caddy, which looks like it was a fairly lightweight comedy about a talented golfer afraid of playing in front of crowds who coaches his love interest's brother and ends up going into showbusiness with him. The plot looks thin and to be honest, quite silly, and has absolutely nothing obvious to do with this song.

As you might expect from this, the song is also very silly, from the overdramatic "In Napoli" introduction, which sets the scene almost like Shakespeare's "fair Verona" monologue in Romeo and Juliet, over these dramatic, minor chords.

The chords then immediately give way to something much happier and cod-folksy, with what sound like mandolins or zithers, and some marimbas, later on, and tambourines, and just a fairly upbeat waltz time.

And then the line people know: "When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza / That's amore / When the world seems to shine you've had too much wine / That's amore." D'aww, it's sappy but I love it.

It does then devolve into onomatopoeia, with bells going "ting-a-ling-a-ling" and hearts playing "tippy-tippy-tay, like a gay tarantella", and from there it gets properly nonsensical. Seriously, lines like "When you dance down the street with a cloud at your feet" would make the Surrealists proud.

While this would normally annoy me, I like it here, because it's a song about the way that falling in love makes you all goofy and leaves you in this sort of loved-up daze. So I can forgive some slightly awkward lyrics, because it echoes the awkwardness of just being absolutely besotted with someone.

It turns into a big party, at this point, with a mixec choir of backing singers chipping in, and a wild sequence of slow-downs and pauses. It's rowdy, in a warm, fun way, like a whole restaurant or inn full of Italian peasants are joining in with you, celebrating being in love. I like it.

And we keep going until a lovely, slow, slightly quieter ending. It's got drama from slowing down, but while it gains in intensity right at the end, Dean makes the very sensible decision not to go for the Big Old Ending that I hate so much. It makes the end of the song feel quite modern, in a way, or at least not as desperately outdated as most David Whitfield-type songs.

Dean, throughout, is really milking his Italian-American heritage, with lots of Italian dropped in throughout, and references to Italian cultural traditions and foods, and I think if I were Italian, or even Italian-American, like Dean, I'd probably feel some kind of way about all this. As a non-Italian, I can just enjoy the cultural pastiche. It does feel a bit like it belongs in a playlist with songs like Mambo Italiano and Nel blu dipinto di blu. You'd hear it playing at Frankie and Bennys, in the UK, it's that kind of vibe - not a bad vibe, but not the classiest.

What saves it is probably Dean's delivery, which always sounds like he's about to laugh, but not in a mean-spirited way, just in a good-natured kind of way. It's annoyed me in other songs, where he sounds a bit smug, but it's impossible to sound smug when you're singing this much nonsense, so it works here. Not a song for every occasion, but it's certainly a happy sort of song for the occasions where it does fit.

I should also say that it makes me think of the "When a fish bits your heel / And it looks like an eel / That's a moray" meme. Which is a niche genre of post that I will reblog every single time I see them, so that also wins this song some points, in my eyes. It's also probably a sign of how popular this song still is, the fact that you can make memes indirectly referencing it, and people of all generations absolutely know where the meme is going and get it, still. Huh.

Absolute banger, change my mind.

The Creep - Ken Mackintosh (10)

I thought this would be about a person who was somehow creepy, like a 1950s precursor to the Radiohead song. I was wrong, but in a good way - this song is such a fun find!

It starts, and you realise immediately that this is going to be a jazzy sort of instrumental, as we start with some striking repeated riffs on what sounds like a bass saxophone? We then get into a shuffling rhythm, and that keeps up for the rest of the track. It's a song that absolutely lives and dies on its heavy walking bass that sort of "creeps" up and down the scale.

It feels like it's doing a less menacing version of what the Dragnet theme did, packaging swing-y rhythms with this sort of heavy, cool, riff-driven sound. You would feel pretty great swaggering around to this, or I would at least!

About a minute in, we get a pretty exciting key change upwards that just ramps up the energy of the whole thing, culimating in this freewheeling, happy-sounding trumpet solo, as the trumpeter messes around over bass and some jazz drums. It's good fun, and it keeps being good fun when the rest of the band comes back in. Trumpets are having a bit of a moment, here in early 1954, and I'm really enjoying it!

You could use this track for the end credits of a film. It's instrumental, it's got just the right amount of happy, carefree vibes, it changes the instruments up just enough to keep things interesting, and it doesn't outstay its welcome, either, just stays around long enough to be enojyable.

We end with a brief drum solo - love a drum solo! - and then the song settles back down, creeping off into the distance as it draws to a close. It's a nice, classy end to a nice, classy song. Certainly an overlooked gem.

Well, both of these songs started strong and grew on me. To be honest, I was ready to slate That's Amore, or at least to explain why I didn't like it's brand of pastiche-y Italian schlock, but I just couldn't. It turns out there's a reason it's stood the test of time, even if it's a bit cheesy. And then we have The Creep, which also comes highly recommended, as a lesser known but very enjoyable listen. Still, my favourite has to be the one that proved me wrong.

Favourite song of the bunch: That's Amore