#granted. being born connected is more dramatic and also this is literally gothic fiction | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daisywords · 7 months

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started rereading a book that I had mixed feelings about but have also thought about a lot since (and I do like to revisit works that had a particular resonance with me to try and figure out what that captivating something was) and anyway I did read this book the first time when I was probably too young for it (I think my mom was reading it for a book club and I saw it on her nightstand and read the blurb and she told me I probably should wait until I was older to read it) and I remember that sneaking into her room to read it in little snatches. Sitting on the floor of her bathroom in secret with that book. But ANYWAY what I'm trying to say is I remembered being vaguely annoyed with the narrator and I was wondering if that would still be the case reading it as an adult. And the answer is yes. I am finding her insufferable, in fact.

#it's The Thirteenth Tale in case you were wondering #and this gal is annoying for multiple reasons #but to get specific. She was born with a conjoined twin but her twin died and she didn't find out about this until she was ten #and weirdly defines like her whole identity on that #haven't got far enough yet but I remember later in the book they like wax poetic about this inherent sense of ''twin-ness''#and like her always feeling the shadow of her dead twin and stuff #which. ok. vibes I guess.#but hear me out. I was also actually a twin (we think) bc my mom literally had a miscarriage but then was still pregnant with me #which. (1) was not a defining moment to find out about bc I do not even remember her first telling me that #(2) maybe has caused me to wonder more about what it would have been like to grow up as a twin than your average person #but I also think that's probably normal to wonder about a little #and (3) is definitely not something I would base my identity around at all??#granted. being born connected is more dramatic and also this is literally gothic fiction #but still idk she's all like ''oh woe is me I'm half of a whole and I've been lonely forever bc I'm missing my other half''#like. girl me too? but idk I'm normal about it #also the whole ''I only read books all day and I don't talk to anyone and I just work at my dad's bookstore #where I don't actually have to do that much work I just get to read whatever I want and also write when I feel like it''#I HATE YOU #she's just like me if my main character syndrome was indulged and if I was ANNOYING and self-obsessed #what growing up an only child will do to you ig lol #if you've reached the end of my very petty and specific rant. hello.

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