#greensmen

[rantraveruminate]

we’re just like you

I know you are sick of seeing & reading political posts... I'm sick of writing them. I thought I’d chime in after last night’s Golden Globes ceremony, on the back of Meryl Streep outlandishly asking our President elect, and all human beings, to treat each other with dignity and respect. Suddenly there’s been that old drumbeat from those outside of Los Angeles to “shut up and act” and that “Hollywood is out of touch” with the rest of America. Los Angeles is one of the most economically, socially and racially diverse cities in the entire United States, we aren't out of touch with our countries changing demographics, we’re it. The Hispanic family? They live on our block. The Muslim man at the park? He’s our lawyer. The same sex couple with three kids? They’re our neighbors. We are the opposite of “out of touch.” Unless you mean out of touch with the values of 1950? Then yes, we moved on from those… 65 years ago, after the 60’s happened. Sure “Hollywood” is not one of the most diverse industries, but at least it’s aware of the problem and (begrudgingly) is trying. But there’s also this little problem/irony you may not be aware of: not everyone who works in the entertainment industry is rich & famous. In fact most are the complete opposite and are JUST LIKE YOU. The entertainment industry is built on the backs of electricians, grips, carpenters, drivers, caterers, productions assistants, runners, plumbers, seamstresses, launderers, greensmen, secretaries, paper pushers, garbagemen & a million other blue collar jobs I’m not thinking of. The entertainment industry employs hundreds of thousands of people in and around Los Angeles; you couldn’t name or recognize 1% of them. For every patch of grass on a pristine studio lot, there’s a gardener mowing that lawn and watering the flowers. For every kombucha sipping actress tossing her recycled glass bottle away, is a person bagging that garbage and taking it to the dumpsters. 

Perhaps I can share my own story as a way to shed some light on how (un)glamorous working in Hollywood can actually be. My first job in “Hollywood” was as a production assistant on a little independent movie starring a fringy tv star. My job was to do whatever was asked of me and to “never, not under any circumstance sit down, or you will be fired.” (It’s like the golden rule for new PA’s. Never sit. Ever.) My first day was 15 hours at an abandoned prison near downtown LA. I made $120 for 14 hours, or just about $8.50 an hr before taxes. My 2nd night we shot in downtown LA, My job was to “lock up” the sidewalk in the background of the shot. This entailed me politely asking skid row drunks and drug addicts to please not walk in our shot. The movie’s budget did not allow for me to have a police officer for protection, so I was left to fend for myself (update: I didn’t die). I worked about 3 weeks on the movie. On my last day on the project my call time was 7am in downtown LA, 3 company moves, 2 lost AD’s, (1 for a conflict, 1 for a concussion) I found myself elevated from “green” PA to emergency 2nd AD (I had no idea wtf I was doing and was terrified every minute) 26 hours later, with no breaks, I wrapped my first movie. Then drove home a zombie. My total pay for these 2.5 weeks of work: under $1.000. I went on to PA a few other shows but I literally didn't have the stamina to stand for 15-16 hrs a day, drive an hour home, sleep 5 hrs, and come back and do it all again, in the rain, every day. The people who do these jobs are fucking hero’s. My body literally caught pneumonia 3 times in 2 months while working on my next job,  Deadwood. When I worked on Deadwood it happened to be the wettest winter in Los Angeles history. There also happened to be dozens of horses everyday on set, and sometimes I was lucky enough to be the PA assigned to “cue the horse.” This meant, standing beside this perpetually shitting beast and say “now” while the horse dropped 25 pounds of fresh horse pies at my feet for 14 hours. The best thing to come out of that job was like most jobs, the friendships with the people who also worked on the show. Sure I get to tell people “I worked on Deadwood” I usually leave out the almost dying of pneumonia and having to quit in shame parts. This was the end of my days as a PA. (very short career) 

My 2nd job was a huge step up. Essentially the same job, but in post production, where the environment was an office and the hours were typically shorter. The pay however, was worse. Under $300 a week after taxes. I was working a full time, highly sought after (entry level) job, yet was living far below the poverty line. At the time my share of the rent and utilities was 1100 a month. Let’s say I wasn’t skinny because I was making healthy choices.  This step up of job entailed me picking up people’s lunches. They were all really nice people...No not really. Most were, but those who weren’t really made the job tough on your faith in humanity and basic decency. I also delivered videotapes to movie studios; the coolest part of that job by far. To this day nothing tops walking across a movie studio lot. It is magical. Oh, and I was tasked with plunging the occasional toilet overflowing with actual human shit. Again, Hollywood is really glamorous. For every movie studio I visited, I easily plunged 10 toilets. The first 10-12 months of the job I was killing it. Arriving early staying late (like you do), and getting everyone their lunches on time and accurately. I took great pride in never making a mistake, and the President of the company would routinely say I was doing a great job. Then came the day I was tasked with disposing of actual human sewage from a burst pipe. I attempted to do this with a few coworkers, but we couldn't stop gagging. We informed the president of the company we couldn’t do it. I’d never seen someone so disappointed in anyone before. “I guess I’ll call a plumber.” From that day forward, I was out of favor.

 A few months later I was given a modest promotion (with a 19 cent raise. let’s get crazy.) I was tasked with doing the inventory of an abandoned warehouse, it just happened to be infested with spiders (I’m arachnophobic.) I then was given another “promotion” to manage these warehouses, this time without a raise, but I got about 100 keys, so I labeled myself The Keymaster. No one but me thought this was funny, nor did anyone care I’d given myself a title. This job came with the perk of not having to clean up the shit when it backed up in any of the 20 toilets that were my domain, but instead involved me picking up the phone and letting the person who had my previous job know: “hey, the toilet overflowed.” This made me feel like a real shithead. But hey, I put in my time and I was kinda done cleaning up actual human shit. Shortly thereafter, I would have an actual promotion where I would earn a living wage, and be given actual responsibility.I was never prouder for the 3 months I had this job. The I lost my job due to the writer’s strike. 

The people I know in this business who are successful (like all businesses really), are the people who work their asses off and willingly metaphorically clean up shit for as many years as needed to get where they eventually end up. The writers, actors, editors, lawyers, grips, drivers, carpenters, plumbers, whatever job. whatever industry. It all starts with hard work, and people in Hollywood are some of the hardest working people I know. They all started at the bottom. Only now a decade later are they making a livable fair wage. And only because of a half century of their respective union’s hard work, are they even earning that. They are still working 14-15 hrs a day, a lot of times away from their families for months at a time. These actors you see on your tv, they are the minority. They are the Bill Gates of SAG. Recent reports suggest as many as HALF of all SAG/AFTRA members live below the poverty line. stats for writers are even more dire. The people who want to work in these fields accept these risks, accept that they may work once and then not for another year, or never again. They accept this with very little complaint publicly. That’s a lot of people scraping by for just a chance at a job. Do you have any idea how hard it is to live in Los Angeles or NYC making minimum wage, or anywhere for that matter? You aren’t living, you’re surviving. Fortunately, our predecessors in Hollywood coordinated strike after strike, and collectively bargained, so that those actors, grips, prop masters, drivers and electricians were paid a fair wage, and given adequate health care. It was the unions of hollywood that did this, NOT the studios offering these things out of the kindness of their hearts. Most of “Hollywood" are union workers JUST LIKE YOU. Drivers, greensmen, electricians, grips. Just trying to do good work, for a fair wage and put a roof over their families heads and food on the table. People in Hollywood work incredibly hard in an insanely competitive industry. The rule of thumb is “never say no” to work. Even if you’ve just worked 90 hrs a week for 6 months straight or haven’t seen your family for more than a few sleepy hours between when you wake up and when your call time is. I have a friend who requires multiple chiropractic appointments a week, has tendinitis in both wrists and elbows. He’s barely 30. I’m sure if you're reading this and you work in a factory, you know someone like this...maybe the someone is you. Thankfully his union provides him health insurance and a fair wage for his labor. He is no different than the steel worker in Pennsylvania, or the woman working the factory line in Detroit, the world just thinks it’s shinier because the reflection from stars are so bright. But that’s another thing. These “stars” they are no different than you or I. They’re human beings with opinions. I’m sure you’d never tell your co worker at the factory or at the office "Hey Nancy, you’re just a paralegal, why don't you shut up and file those legal briefs” as much as you may like to. Of course, Nancy is entitled an opinion. We’re all Americans and we are all entitled to our opinion’s, right or wrong. Liberal or conservative. You have the right to disagree with what Meryl Streep said, you even have a right to tell her to shut up. But you are wrong to say she or other artists shouldn't have political opinions. 

2016 saw the passing of dozens of American luminaries,  and one of them was Mohammad Ali.  Part of his legacy was his willingness to stand up for what he believed was right, Despite intense and unflinching opposition to those beliefs. Despite people telling him to "shut up and fight". He refused. 50 years later we look back, and through the lens of history, most Americans respect his decision to do so. He helped incite a national dialogue at a time when it was desperately needed, And he did it through non violent protest. When someone has been fortunate enough to be given a platform, they have just as much of right to speak up as anyone else, not less. As much as the guy who cooks the food on set, or the woman who grips, or as much as the union electricians who light these stars. They all have opinions and all can and should express them, enthusiastically and freely, without fear of retribution from The President of the United States. Because this is their AND your right as an American.

[myersbriggands]

Myers Briggands part 5: Green clan information

The green clan is vaguely Buddhist, and the clan consists of INFPs, INFJs, ENFJs and ENFPs. Believe in the kindness of all things and hold love for that kindness. The greens aren’t really governed, but rather they’re lead by the religious leaders. citizens keep the peace amongst themselves and work for each other instead of for currency or a larger purpose. The green clansmen live in small communities of smaller huts. They live in a similar way to early Inuits or indigenous Australians. They tend to not want for much, and all four types mingle freely inside any given village. This is largely because they are a very want-less people. They would rather focus on the joy they give and gain from others, as well as the pursuits of creativity, than they would on material wealth. Even still, because of their creative and empathetic nature, they tend be on good terms with the purple clansmen, who they connect with on an almost spiritual level. This means that purple clansmen will offer their skills, their abilities, their tech, in exchange for companionship and the other, more utility based skills the greens have to offer. On the other end, the greens tend to be on good terms with the blues for much the same reason. Greens are the most passive of all clans, and tend to be totally neutral during most conflict. The purples and blues aren’t particularly happy about this, as any side that the greens chose to help would have absolutely no issue wiping out their opponents, but they respect it anyway. Only the Orange clan seeks to attack the greens directly. In these fights, greens tend to retreat, as they haven’t got the natural firepower in order to repel aggressors. Occasionally, purples will be around and, with the help of an INFJ and INFP, can decimate whole attacking battalions. Even ENFJs can turn the tide, but this is a rare occurrence. Because of their incredible power when coupled with any other type, INFJs are often targeted and killed more often than any other type on the face of the earth. However, most greens will attempt to rehabilitate any orange soldiers that get left behind in attacks. It rarely goes well, but the greens are nothing if not a hopeful people. Greens mostly tend to hunt for food using spears and nets. They wear very little, and the amount of clothing degrades the further into green territory one might venture. They are quite fond of making tattoos, and the inner tribes often tend to be very touchy feely. When two inner greensmen talk, they stand inches from one another, moving their hands around each other in order to stay connected and absorb the conversation with all their senses. It is seen as incredibly rude to not reciprocate these gestures, which purples really struggle with. Outter green villages on the western side of Africa tend to be about 10-40% comprised of other clans and types, but this number diminishes quickly the further in one gets to the continent. It’s not because they’re hostile or anti social, but that the environment is difficult to cope with for most other clans, and the customs are often incredibly bizarre and varied from village to village.

[vontheslate]

Don't ever fuck with the Greens crew