#happy belated bday Salem

[wellhellotragic]

36 Questions

Summary: They say all it takes is 36 questions. 36 questions between you and a complete stranger and suddenly you’ll both fall madly in love with each other. 36 agonizingly personal questions that force you to reveal your deepest darkest secrets. Well, that, and 4 minutes of staring into the most devastatingly blue eyes you’ve ever seen.

Rating: Um, mature I guess?

A/N: This was written as a pick-me up for @artistic-writer who had a really awful shitty week. As I’m a procrastinator extraordinaire, it’s now also a very slightly b-day prezzie! I think I missed it by about 2 hours, but technically it’s still today where I am lol. Happy birthday Salem!!!

Thank you @best-left-hook-jones for making this better and for the prompt idea, even if it did come at the dignity of your grad tech!

Also on AO3

                                                 36 Questions

There were many things in life that people could describe Emma Swan as: orphan, foster kid, reformed thief, closed-off, even prickly. But the one thing Emma definitely wasn’t was a coward. She hadn’t back down from Chris Palmer when he’d tried to steal her camera in the ninth grade, and she wouldn’t back down from this either.

“You can always call chicken and take the extra shot.”

Ruby had already been three sheets to the wind when Emma arrived to the White Rabbit after work. Taking a job in the library in the evenings to help pay for bills, also helped give Emma a chance to catch up on her school work during the quiet moments, but it really ate into her social life. Not that she had much of one, but she had a few friends.

The White Rabbit wasn’t anything spectacular by any means. It was an average college dive bar, and a place where people could go to get lost, or really really drunk in most cases. The floor was covered in drink slush and the wallpaper was worn and ripped in places. It smelled stale, and there was always some idiot that would try to hit on her or Ruby.

Luckily, tonight Mary Margaret and David had agreed to tag along. Mary Margaret was already attempting to force water down Ruby’s throat, and David was in protection mode, giving death glares to every man that so much as looked at them.

Having skipped lunch, it only took two drinks for Emma to reach the point of pleasantly buzzed. By that time, Ruby had sobered up enough to function without the use of Mary Margaret to keep her upright. Pleasant conversation had drifted into more mature topics, and then, out of nowhere, the dare had been set.

It had been a long standing tradition in the group. At any point in time, any of them could dare one of the others to do something. They only got one dare per month though, so it wasn’t something to be wasted on a frivolous act. As soon as the words “I dare you” fell from Ruby’s lips, Emma knew she was screwed.

Sure, there was always the chicken option. It meant walking around flapping your arms like a chicken as you clucked for 30 seconds straight. It was a fail safe Belle had built in before she’d left for her foreign exchange program. Either way, humiliation was sure to follow.

“I dare you,” the slurred words paused as her eyes scanned the room, “to kiss that guy over there.”

Emma rolled her eyes, knowing Ruby had probably picked out some chubby co-ed or a frat boy with the IQ of a turtle.

“Wait, which one?” Admittedly, Ruby’s finger wasn’t exactly steady.

“That one. The guy in the black leather jacket.”

Emma’s eyes searched through the crowd of people and, like fate, it was as if the heavens had looked down and parted the masses at that exact moment. There he was; sex and leather. Emma had to force herself to breath. Even without catching his gaze, she could tell he had the most hypnotically blue eyes she’d ever seen before, and his hair was artfully tousled, like he’d just finished fucking someone in the bathroom. She could practically feel his lips on hers already, the burn from his scruff on her cheeks, her neck, her thighs.

It was too good to be true. None of them, Ruby included, ever put forth a dare that didn’t result in total humiliation. Emma watched for a moment, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“Are you in or out?”

The goading was the last push she needed. Throwing back the last of her drink, she stood up, throwing her friend a wink before marching towards tall, dark, and gorgeous. But just as she made it to the end of the bar, the other shoe dropped in the form of a blonde bombshell.

Tinkerbelle Greene. Emma’s only real interaction with Tink was from a photography course she’d taken her sophomore year to avoid the foreign language requirement. The short blonde had been a few years older, and had zero inhibitions. For their end of year projects, each student had to submit three self portraits, something that revealed their true selves. Tink’s had all been nude, something every guy in the course responded to. And now she was sitting next him, vying for the same man she was.

Well crap. It was one thing to accept the dare when he was just some random single guy at the bar. She’d never consider the idea that he might already have a girlfriend, or even worse, a wife. Pausing to take stock of the situation, she let her eyes drift to his left hand in search of a wedding ring. Instead, she only found a black glove.

Emma turned back to Ruby, seriously reconsidering, but when Ruby tucked her arms in and started flapping her makeshift wings, Emma’s resolve returned. Stalking up to a bit like a mad woman, she barely managed to acknowledge the absolute rage radiating from Tink as she gripped the lapels of his coat and wrenched him forward.

His lips were softer than she had imagined they would be, and there was a faint trace of rum lingering, until his lips parted at the swipe of her tongue and she nearly drowned in the flavor. She could feel him everywhere, his tongue exploring her mouth, the way one of his hands found purchase on her waist, only after having grazed her ass. The other hand softly tugged on her hair, forcing her head backwards. He stepped closer so that their was no space lingering between their bodies, and had it not been for the catcalls next to them, Emma might have allowed herself to become lost in him.

“Way to go, Emma!”

Hearing her name from a slightly drunk Mary Margaret was all it took to remind her of where she was, and what she was doing. Pulling back, she felt her cheeks redden at the embarrassment of the entertainment they’d just provided the entire bar. Somewhere behind her she heard a huff she was vaguely certain came from Tink, before the sound of high heels retreating started fading away.

“That was-”

Oh God, and he had an accent.

“A one time thing.”

Without any further explanation, Emma pushed lightly against his chest, just enough to disingange herself from his arms, before spinning on her heel and walking back to the table her friends were still sat at.

She didn’t sit back down though. Something felt off. Emma was suddenly dizzy, like her entire world had be spun and turned upside down. She just needed to get home and sleep it off. To pretend like the guy in the black leather jacket didn’t exist, and to somehow forget that a random stranger has just given her the most passionate kiss of her life.

“Ok guys, it’s been real, but I’m out.”

“Really, you do that,” David started as he waved his finger around, “and then just leave like it was nothing?”

“Pretty much.” Emma shrugged, hoping to play off the way her entire body had turned into a puddle at the thought of doing that again. “Besides, I promised Professor Mills that I’d look after her son for a couple of hours in the morning, before Ruby’s thing.”

The ‘thing’ in question was still a mystery to Emma, but when she’d heard that it paid $100 for less than 2 hours of her time, she was in. Plus it helped her friend out with her senior psychology project. A win-win for Emma.

Or it would have been if Emma hadn’t spent the next two hours laying in her bed, unable to sleep with ocean blue eyes running through her mind. Just before she’d left the bar, she’d turned to give her friends a final wave, but instead he’d caught her eye. He’d been watching her, his fingertips resting against his lips, a question in his eyes she couldn’t answer.

In a fit of desperation, Emma took matters into her own hands, quite literally. She could still feel the press of is growing erection against her, and as the vibrations from her toy worked at her core, it was the image of of him above her, pummeling, whispering naughty things in her ear in his lilting accent that finally pushed her over the edge.

Sleep came easily after that.

Looking after Henry was more exhausting than Emma had expected it to be. Granted, with images of blue eyes haunting her dreams, Emma hadn’t slept nearly enough to compete with the energy level of a two year old, but Henry was extra excitable. As it turned out, Henry had found Regina’s secret stash of monthly chocolate and had devoured an entire box of Happy Hippos right before Emma had arrived, and had been running off of pure sugar right up until he crashed five minutes before Regina got home.

Emma didn’t miss the condescending way Regina wished her a good day as she took in the mess in the living room. The day was off to a bang up start and she still had to go be a guinea pig for Ruby.

The psychology building was housed behind the administrative building. Getting in and navigating the maze was easy enough, having spend plenty of afternoons searching for Ruby to grab her share of the grocery money. The lab that Ruby used was on the 3rd floor of the building, with a small window the overlooked the quad behind it. Ruby had explained that they only used the room for certain experiments as many participants often got distracted by everyone milling around outside, and that would ruin the results. For her experiment though, she wanted something with a slightly less clinical feeling.

In the room was a couch with some blankets and a coffee table with unlit candles. All of the other furniture had been removed, and Emma immediately felt her walls begin to rise.

“So,” Emma let the word linger a bit. “What exactly is it that I’m doing here? Because it looks like whatever you have planned is bordering on unethical, or you know, illegal?”

“Em, it’s not like that. Geeze, get your head of if the gutt- What is that on your shirt?”

Emma looked down to see brown stains near the hemline of her cream sweater.

“Uh, I think it’s chocolate. Or at least I’m praying that it’s chocolate. Henry was covered in the stuff when I got to the professor’s house.”

“Well you need to change because it looks like someone shat on you. Not exactly conducive to the study.”

“And what exactly is your study? You’ve been pretty mum about the whole thing.”

“Change first!”

Emma looked around, in a sarcastic response. She hadn’t brought any spare clothes with her and unless Ruby had something stashed away, there wasn’t another option. Unfortunately, Emma had failed to consider the Ruby Lucas had zero inhibitions and gave no fucks about her body. Quickly stripping herself of her scarlet colored knit top, the dangled the garment on her finger, daring Emma to protest.

She didn’t. One thing Emma had learned over the two years that they had lived together was how to pick her battles, and judging by Ruby’s wolfish grin, she knew a war was coming. With a huff, Emma grabbed the bottom of her sweater and pulled it off of her body, throwing it at Ruby. Taking the offered top, Emma struggled to figure out how to put it on so that she wouldn’t get tangled in the twisted straps in the back.

“Killian Jones reporting for duty as orde-”

Emma squealed and immediately spun around trying to hide herself from the door, keeping the top pressed again her chest, her chest that was nearly matching in color.

“Oh, I- Uh- I’ll just wait out in the hall.”

Emma was certain the noise she heard was him bumping into the doorway as his footstep hurriedly left the room. She was mortified. Scrabbling, she finally managed to get Ruby’s top on just in time for Ruby to call him back into the room.

And there he was. The man from the night before, in the bar. She man she’d fantasized about, standing 3 feet in front of her. She wasn’t sure how much of an eyeful she’d given him, but judging by the shade of his ears and the way he was nervously scratching behind one of them, he’d seen plenty.

Well fuck.

Neither of them spoke, and Emma couldn’t help but notice the vivid blue of his eyes had been replaced, only the barest hint of sapphire remaining.

“Killian, this is Emma Swan, my roommate.”

Killian stepped forward, hesitantly stretching his hand out to her.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, lass.”

His hand was rough wrapped around hers, obviously used to manual labor.

“And Emma, this is Killian. He’s in my women’s study class and volunteered to help me out.”

Emma almost thought she was going to get away from more embarrassment, but Ruby wasn’t finished yet. “Or you may remember him from last night. He’s the one whose throat you had your tongue down.”

Emma let out a sound resembling a strangled cat, and Killian didn’t seem to have been faring much better and he coughed in surprise.

“So, if you’ll both take a seat on the couch, we can get started.”

“Started with what, exactly, lass? You were a bit hazy on the details before.”

Well at least Emma wasn’t the only one lost right now.

“Sit.”

Ruby was firm this time and both Emma and Killian elected to sit as far apart from each other as possible, which wasn’t as far away as Emma might have hoped. What was once a spacious couch now felt like a loveseat and she could feel his body heat radiating off of him. The scent of leather and sandalwood danced through the air around her. Even now, in the light of day he was still intoxicating, perhaps even more so now that she could properly see him.

Which is why Emma chose to sit facing straight out instead of turning towards him.

Ruby stood in front of them both, holding what looked like a full package of index cards. The top half were pink while the bottom half blue.

“I don’t want to bore you with the details on what we’re measuring here, but the instructions are fairly straight forward. In my hand, I have a set of questions. You ask each other the questions written on the cards and you must answer honestly. There is no skipping questions.”

Ruby finished with a pointed glare at Emma. Splitting the cards in half, she handed them to both Emma and Killian and started walking to the door.

“I’ll be in the next room and I can see and hear you, but please act as normal as possible.”

With that, she was gone, and Emma found herself stumbling over her words as she tried to read the first questions out loud.

“One. ‘Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?’ You’ve got to be kidding me.”

She heard him little chuckle, but continued to avoid meeting his gaze.

“What’s wrong, love? Not a fan of dinner parties?”

The lilt was just a strong as she remembered it, as Emma found herself unconsciously leaning towards him as he spoke, the lust filled fantasies of him jumped back into her brain.

“Love?”

God. How long had she been day dreaming?

“Not your love. And these questions are stupid.”

“Emma Swan!” Ruby’s voice rang through an intercom somewhere in the room. “The instructions said to answer the questions. The did not say to argue their purpose.”

Felling a mix between annoyed and properly chastised, Emma felt her walls climbing.

“How about I start then, Swan? I’d have to go with my brother.”

“Seriously? You can eat with anyone in the world, even supermodels, and you go with your brother? A man you’ve probably seen everyday of your life?”

She chanced a look at him and saw a storm brewing behind his eyes as he clenched his jaw.

“Aye, your right. I did see him nearly everyday of my life,” he paused for a second, “right up until he died four years ago. I’d give anything to share one last meal with him.”

Fuck.

Not knowing how to respond, Emma decided to press on. She didn’t normally ‘do’ people, and definitely didn’t ‘do’ feelings. Especially not with greek god level strangers that she once managed to jump in a bar, only to make a complete ass of herself twice later on.

“Arthur Koehler.”

“Excuse me?”

“Arthur Koehler. He was one of the pioneers in criminal forensics and actually responsible for catching the guy that kidnapped and killed the Lindbergh baby. He solved the whole case just using a sample of wood, tracking down where the wood had been harvested, milled, and sold even.”

She looked over to see Killian giving her the most quizzical of looks.

“Criminal justice major,” she said, hoping somehow that would explain her fascination with murder.

Killian nodded along before reading out his own card.

“Number two: ‘Would you like to be famous? In what way’?”

The second question was easier, both answering that they’d each be content avoiding the limelight.

The third question had Emma nearly giddy as Killian responded.

Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

He hadn’t actually answered - not with words, anyways - but when his cheeks filled with a beautiful shade of rose, Emma knew immediately that the answer was ‘yes’.

“Oh my god. You totally do that don’t you!”

The questions became easier as they went on. There was an odd sense of comradery in having to spill your guts with a complete stranger, even if looking at him made Emma’s stomach do somersaults. It wasn’t until twenty minutes later that the questions started getting more personal, making Emma uncomfortable. If it weren’t for her loyalty to Ruby, she’d have gotten up and left.

“If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?”

Emma didn’t hesitate. “Body.”

She watched as Killian’s head tilted to the side, obviously surprised by her answer.

“I’m not vain or superficial or anything. It’s just, sometimes it might not feel like the worst thing to forget parts of your life.”

Parts like the ex who tried to frame her for theft, or the guy who cheated on her. Parts like the parents who dumped her on the side of the road. Parts like being bounced around from one hellish foster home to the next.

Killian didn’t seem to need her to explain though. Somehow, he just got it, like he could read her. She was an open book to him. His hand moved to rest over hers, and had Ruby not come in at that precise moment, she probably would have found herself in his lap. She’d allowed herself to get so wrapped up that she forgot where she was, or that she didn’t know him.

She jerked her hand back as Ruby informed them they’d have a five minute break. She took the time to wash her face off in the bathroom and recompose herself.

It wasn’t enough. Immediately after the break, the questions got even harder.

If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

How do you feel about your relationship with your mother.

Emma could sense Killian’s hesitation each time he had to ask her a question, especially after she was forced to tell him about her past in excruciating detail. Each new detail she had to give him felt like a knife to the heart. For his part, he hadn’t had the picture perfect life either. His mother had died of cancer when he was seven, then his father took off in the middle of the night when he was twelve. But through it all, he’d had his brother. Emma hadn’t had anyone.

Ruby gave them another break after the second set of questions, and this time Emma chose not to leave the room. There was something calming about Killian’s presence, and although she’d never see him again after the experiment was over, the irony of it not lost on her, she wasn’t ready to give him up just yet.

So for the five minute break, they sat together side by side, thighs brushed up against each other. On more than one occasion his hand had found its way to her leg in an attempt to soothe her. Emma found herself surprised each time he did it, as she never felt the sense to brush him off like she had so many guys before him. Affection wasn’t something she found comforting in a man usually.

Ruby warned them that the final set of questions would push them even more. They’d have to look even deeper into themselves and reveal stuff they’d both kept hidden deep down.

If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

Emma had never felt so alone in her life. Before, she’d always told herself that if she didn’t let people in, she couldn’t be hurt by them, but as the questions continued, she realized that one day she would die, bitter and alone, and she’d only have herself to blame. It was a hard realization.

She hadn’t even noticed the way she’d drifted into Killian, resting her head on his chest as his arms wrapped around her. At least not until Ruby came in again and gave them the final instructions.

Four minutes. They’d have to stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes. No talking. No moving. No looking away. Just four minutes of getting lost in his eyes as she thought back over everything she had told him, and all of the things he shared as well.

He was studying marine engineering so he could build boats after graduation. He had his heart broken by a woman who didn’t tell him she was married until he’d proposed to her. He’d fled England to escape the memories of Milah and Liam. He was kind and loyal. He’d even sang to her in his angelic voice.

And as she stared into his eyes, all she could think about was what it would be like to give him a chance. To wonder if he was worth lowering her walls for. To wonder what could have happened between them if she wasn’t so damn broken inside.

“And that’s it. You guys are done.”

She wasn’t sure what to say or do, so out of instinct the wall rose once more, and Emma left, running away before anyone could stop her. She hadn’t meant to let anyone in, and she was terrified of the fact that she wanted him for something more than just one night. She wanted forever.

When Ruby returned to their apartment, it was hours later. Emma was slightly furious with her for roping her into something she knew was going to be so emotionally draining. They argued for what felt like ages. Emma had kept everything bottled up so tightly for years, that she didn’t know how to close the dam again now that it had been opened. They were barely even on speaking terms when they parted ways to go to bed that night, and when Emma woke again it was late in the morning to an empty apartment.

She had cried herself to sleep and the exhaustion of it all had lingered. Rolling out of bed, she started for the kitchen, but stopped short when she saw an envelope that had been slipped under her door. She didn’t recognize the looped handwriting, but there had only even been one person who called her Swan.

Dear Emma,

Please don’t be too cross with Ruby. This is actually my fault, you see. I’ve noticed you on more than one occasion with the lady Lucas, and having fancied you, I asked her to introduce us. She warned me that your heart would not easily be won, and I fear I may have pushed her too hard as a result. I hadn’t realized the purpose of Ruby’s study until we were half way through it and it was too late to back out. I never meant for any harm to come to you. Please accept my sincerest apologies.

Killian Jones.

It took Emma three days to muster up the courage to find him. Over those three days, thoughts of him had invaded every part of her being. She could still smell him on the top Ruby had loaned her. She could still feel his scruff against her cheek. And worst of all, she could see the way his eyes nearly pooled as she told him about her pathetic past.

It took some searching and some internet stalking, but she had figured out his favorite place was a small little harbor on the outside of town. He’d checked-in to a tiny seaside restaurant about a dozen times the previous month, and posted multiple pictures from the dock outside.

He was sitting alone on a bench overlooking the water. The sun was beginning to set, casting the sky in colors of pink and orange. It was a moment her mind wanted to capture for some reason.

“Mind if I sit?”

If she’d startled him, he gave no indication. He only gesture to the open spot next to him. They sat together, silently taking in the sunset until only the barest hint of a golden halo crested the sky above the water.

“So what was the purpose of the experiment?”

It wasn’t a perfect opening line, but it was safer than blurting out how much she missed him when she hardly even knew him.

“To fall in love.”

There was a pause that seemed to stretch to the end of time.

“It’s this thing I read about in a newspaper. Someone created this list of questions that are so deep and meaningful, that when two strangers answer them to each other, they’re supposed to form a bond. Some people argue that it only causes you to feel affection for the other person, but other believe that you��ll fall in love.”

There was another pause as the last hint of light dipped below the water.

“And did you?”

She felt him stiffen next to her.

“No.” She felt her heart beginning to crack. “No, I promise, I didn’t know that’s what Ruby’s experiment was about until it was too late-”

She cut him off, grabbing his hand in a moment of courage.

“I meant, did you fall in love?”

His tongue came out to wet his bottom lip as he stared out at the water before them.

“I felt affection for you the moment I first saw you. You were amused at something Ruby had said and your laugh was like music to my ears. But I think-” He turned to look her in the eyes. “I think I fell in love you the moment you kissed me. I felt something that I’ll never be able to explain, but I knew, Emma, that I only ever wanted to kiss you from then on out.”

She couldn’t say anything back. She couldn’t tell him that she’d fallen for him over the course of thirty six questions and four minutes. Her walls were still too high, but for the first time ever, she felt ready to start pulling them down, brick by brick. So when she kissed him again, it was to show him all of the things she couldn’t say just yet. It was to show him that she loved him too.