#happy national gf day to the love of my life robin mf buckley 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

[beef-bakery]

When Robin Met Rabies

Rating: Robin Buckley x f!Reader - 3.4k words - SFW

Synopsis: Maybe Robin is a bit in over her head when you end up with a raccoon bite

Warnings: rabies, animal bite description, slight arguing, cursing, cleaning of wounds, fluff, cuddling, kisses, banter, no pronouns used for reader but is referred to as a girlfriend

You really hadn't planned for this to happen.

Robin’s shrieks in your ear interrupted your thoughts.

“Will you please just calm down?” You winced. “You're about to blow my eardrums off.”

You really hadn’t planned to get bitten, but who does? You doubted there was anyone in the world who would waltz into the woods holding out a peanut butter coated limb for a hungry and also feral racoon to chomp on - actually, thinking twice about it, you thought that Steve might be just stupid enough to do that. Only if a pretty girl asked him to, of course.

“How can I calm down?” Robin’s voice was breathless as she hiked your arm higher over her neck. She never had been the most athletic. “You might have rabies!”

You rolled your eyes. “I most certainly do not.”

“You don’t know that! We have no idea where that racoon has been.”

“Yeah, but it wasn't foaming at the mouth or anything. Trust me, I’m fine.” You yelped as Robin suddenly stopped and swept you up in a bucket lift, her hands under the back of your knees and around your waist. Hold on, maybe having rabies wasn't so bad. “You're totally overreacting.”

“Frothing at the mouth isn't the only symptom of rabies in racoons,” Robin argued.

“Well please, Encyclopedia Robin, enlighten me.” You shifted in her arms, crossing your own and glaring up at her.

“Well, self mutilation is one, and as far as I could see, that racoon had a decent amount of lacerations-”

“Lacerations? What are you? Some sort of secret surgeon?” You squinted up at her, tweaking her nose.

“Hey, don't do that,” Robin chided, stopping to look down at you before adjusting your position, pulling you higher up to get a better grip. “I don't want rabies.”

“I thought you could only get rabies through a bite,” you said mischievously, a grin slowly growing across your face.

“Don't give me that look.” Robin said, fixing a serious stare onto you. A silly thing, really. Seriousness didn't suit Robin. “I will drop you.”

“No, you won't.”

“I promise, I will.” Making direct eye contact with your girlfriend, you slowly opened your mouth, inching closer to her left shoulder, which was exposed due to the tank top she wore. “Oh, no you don't.”

Before you could blink, Robin had dropped you straight on your ass. “Ow!” You moaned in pain, dropping back on the forest floor.

From where you’d been dropped, you could see that Robin had bolted out of your range. A smart move, as you weren't known to be merciful when taking revenge. However, it seemed that your yelp of pain had brought Robin back, because she was creeping slowly into your line of sight. You quickly closed your eyes, resisting the urge to stick your tongue out to play dead.

As you heard a twig snap, you cracked an eye open to observe Robin tentatively approaching. She said your name once, a nervous lilt in her voice. You groaned again, closing your eye. You heard her kneel down and seized the opportunity, grabbing ahold of her shoulders.

“Gotcha!” you yelled, leaning in close to bite her neck before deciding against it and pressing a kiss against her pressure point.

“Don't scare me like that.” Robin pushed you off, gentler this time.

You stuck your bottom lip out, pouting and giving her puppy dog eyes. You couldn't keep up the facade, cackling once she gave you her serious face again.

“Ah come on, don't be like that.” You pushed yourself up so that you were resting on your palms. “I was just joking.”

“Rabies isn't a joke,” she chided, standing up and offering you a hand. You grabbed onto it, finally on your feet then on nothing at all as Robin hefted you onto her back. “The whole point of me exerting myself-”

“Exerting?” you asked, incredulous. It was out of character for Robin to use such large words, but you supposed that since she was playing doctor, she’d want to fully get into character.

“Yes, exerting,” Robin continued, slightly annoyed. “The whole point was so that you would have to use up less energy. You need to preserve it so that your body can heal.”

“Aww, that's so sweet,” you cooed. “Only, I don't have rabies.” You slipped out of her grip and back onto the forest floor, giving her a hard look. “You worry too much.” You nudged her with your shoulder before continuing your trek back to the car.

“Well, excuse me for not wanting my lovely girlfriend to be subjected to a terrible, terrible disease.” Robin jogged to catch up with you.

“Come on,” you rolled your eyes. “It can't be that bad.”

“Oh, really?” Robin raised an eyebrow at you, as if asking you to test her once more. “The mortality rate for humans who contract rabies is 99 percent.”

“Jesus! Where’d all this knowledge come from?” You squinted at her. “If you put this much energy into studying, you’d have straight A’s.”

“Who cares about straight A’s? Good grades can't save you from rabies!” You rolled your eyes as Robin continued. “And as I was saying, it’s painful! You can get muscle spasms, seizures, hallucinations. You name it, it’s probably a symptom of rabies.”

“And yet I haven't experienced any of them.” You argued, beginning to tire of this conversation.

The two of you neared the car and you gave your girlfriend the stink eye as she reached for the driver’s seat door handle at the same time you did.

“I'm driving,” you said.

“No, you’re not.” Robin shot back.

“And why not?” you asked, removing your hand. You knew that Robin couldn't possibly get into the car when the door was locked, and only you had the keys.

“You could have rabies!”

“But I don't!”

“You don't know that!”

“Neither do you!”

This was getting ridiculous. The two of you almost never fought. Bantered, sure, but you had never actually argued, and you sure as hell weren't planning on starting now.

“Robin,” you sighed out, leaning against the car. “Just let me drive.” Robin opened her mouth to speak but you cut her off. “You don't even have your license, and who’s going to drive you home? You can't take my car back to your house.”

“Then I'll just stay with you.” Robin offered. “At least until I know you’re okay.”

You let out a groan. “And just how long does it take for rabies symptoms to appear?”

“Well, it depends. It can take a few days. Or weeks. Or months.”

You threw your arms up in the air in frustration. “Well then, what does it matter?”

“Because it’s deadly!”

“Surely there's someone out there who’s survived it!”

“Last time I checked, the mortality rate was 99%.” Robin reiterated.

“Guess I’ll die, then.” You rolled your eyes and unlocked the car, sitting down. You reached for the door handle and found Robin’s hand resting atop yours. You looked up at her with a haughty look, expecting her to be in full rabies-informant mode, but found only the look of a concerned girlfriend. “Okay, fine.” You relented. “I'll come to you if I experience any symptoms.”

Robin perked up, releasing your hand and shutting the door herself, then opening the passenger door and settling in. “You know,” she said almost timidly, “It’s best to treat rabies before symptoms. After symptoms show, you have about one to two weeks before you die.” You gave her a look, to which she held her arms up defensively. “I’m just sayin’!”

The rest of the ride back to Robin’s house was relatively peaceful. There was no more talk of rabies, and you found yourself once again enjoying your girlfriend’s presence. It was only when you pulled up to her house that Robin cleared her throat ominously.

“Would you like to come inside?” Robin’s question could be perceived as innocent only through its words, for her strained voice showed her true intent.

You side eyed your girlfriend. “Any particular reason for wanting me to come in?”

“Well I just thought it would be nice, y’know? I could make dinner-”

“We both know you can't cook,” you pointed out, folding your arms.

“Okay, then you can cook and we could watch a movie or something…” Robin trailed off, clearly out of ideas. You sighed, rubbing your eyes.

“Look, babe,” you said, “I know you’re worried about me and rabies, but I’m probably fine. I'll call you if anything happens.”

“I just-” You silenced Robin with a single look, her mouth shutting guiltily. “Sorry,” she muttered. “I'm just worried about you.”

You gave her a soft smile, leaning your head against the headrest. “Hey.” You reached over into Robin’s lap to take her hand. “I understand. It’s just that it's been a long day, and I'm sick of all this rabies talk.”

“Okay,” Robin smiled. “I'll see you later.” She leaned over and your eyes fluttered closed in anticipation of a kiss, but you were surprised when her lips met your cheek instead of your lips.

“Sorry,” Robin said guiltily when you gave her a concerned look. “It’s just that rabies transfers through spit.”

You laughed loudly, pulling Robin’s hand to your mouth before pressing a soft kiss against the back of it.

“I love you. Be safe,” you called after your girlfriend. She gave you a thumbs up before blowing you a kiss, her grin brighter than the sun.

You leaned back in your seat, admiring your girlfriend while you waited for her to get inside.

---

The rest of your evening was normal: catching up on homework and having dinner before washing up for bed. It was only when you were in the shower did you start to worry.

The bite hadn't gone away. Instead it’d become somewhat inflamed, the puncture wounds tunneling deeper into the skin than you had thought was possible.

You bit your lip before scrubbing at it furiously. Fuck, shit, fuck. If you were to die from something, like hell would it be rabies, of all things.

You finished your shower, trying to ignore the throbbing bite on your forearm. It hadn't been throbbing before, had it? Maybe it was a placebo effect of sorts, your brain tricking you. It had to be some sort of result of human evolution, like survival of the fittest. Only the most paranoid humans could survive. There's no way you could have rabies, right? Right?

As the night grew deeper, you found that you couldn't ignore the gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach. You had bandaged the bite, but it most likely wasn't doing much. Bandaging was to prevent infection, and if you did have rabies, you would be countering your body’s natural response by forcing the infection to stay inside. With that thought you ripped off the bandage, wincing as you did.

You tried to sleep, but you found that you couldn't. Finally accepting that you weren't going to get a wink, you sat up in bed, turning on your light and checking the time. It was two am.

Was it too late to call Robin?

Throwing caution to the wind, you threw your legs over the side of the bed, got up and threw a coat over your pajamas. You grabbed your car keys and headed outside, starting the car to get to Robin’s house.

---

Plink. Plink. Plink.

The pebbles you threw at Robin’s window made such a noise, you worried that you’d wake her neighbors up.

“How can someone be this heavy of a sleeper?” you muttered to yourself after throwing an especially large stone, the click echoing through her cul-de-sac.

You saw her curtains move, and a yawning Robin appeared at her window. You waved, dropping the next pebble you had posed to throw.

Robin’s brow furrowed as she opened her window, leaning out ever so slightly and calling out to you. “What are you doing?”

“Uh, I missed you?” You really hadn't thought this far ahead. Up until now, your anxiety had been controlling you, dictating your moves and forcing you to drive to your girlfriend’s house.

Robin leaned back inside her room to check the time. “At two in the morning?” She rubbed her eyes. “What’s this really about?”

“Let me in and I'll tell you,” you called up.

Robin nodded, stifling a yawn and closing the window. It only took her a couple minutes, opening her front door to reveal her own pajama-clad self.

You rushed in, nearly knocking her over with the force you exerted.

“Whoa there Cinderella, the clock struck midnight hours ago.” Robin leaned against the now-closed door.

You gave her the stink eye. “Someone seems to be in a better mood.”

“That's what happens when you give someone time to wake up,” Robin said, before muttering under her breath. “But notmuch.”

“I'm sorry, did you say something?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Nothing, my love,” she said in a falsetto voice. “Now, what is it my dearest desires?” Robin fake bowed, taking your hand and giving it a loud smooch.

“Stop that.” You wiped your hand on her. “That’s disgusting.”

“If you say so. Now do tell, what brings you to my humble abode at such a late hour?” Her eyes widened as her mouth dropped open. “Would it be? You wish to besmirch me?” Robin stifled a fake sob. “I shouldn't! But it is you, is it not? How can I hold myself back? Oh, what will my father think?”

You nudged Robin rather harshly. “Hey, come on.”

“Okay, okay,” Robin held up her hands to show that she was defenseless. “Now really, why did you come over?”

You averted your eyes, instead looking at the floor, made of beautiful dark cherry hardwood planks. You scuffed your shoe, procrastinating telling your girlfriend the real reason you came over.

“Hey, shoes off,” Robin said, pointing to your feet. “I don't want to have to clean up a mess you could've prevented.”

“Right,” you said, happy to busy yourself. You slipped your shoes off as slowly as possible, delaying the inevitable. After a few moments of standing awkwardly, Robin gestured for you to start speaking. “Well… I was kinda… worriedimighthaverabies.”

“What?”

“I was kinda worried I might have rabies,” you muttered, your cheeks beginning to warm.

“What?” You couldn't tell if Robin was torturing you by making you repeat yourself, or if you were actually too quiet.

“I was worried I might have rabies!” you nearly shouted.

Robin flinched back, rubbing her ears. “Jesus, you could wake the whole town with those lungs.”

You huffed out, “Well, maybe everyone would still be asleep if someone could actually hear!”

Robin grinned at you. “Sorry, what was that?”

“Shut up.” You hit Robin’s shoulder with your own as you headed for the stairs. “Coming with?”

Robin rolled her eyes. “It's my house, dumbass. Of course I'm coming.”

And that's how the two of you ended up in Robin’s bathroom, you perched on top of the toilet lid, Robin on the rim of the bathtub, the two of you surrounded by various medical appliances.

Robin held up the instructions included in her first aid kit, tilting her head to the side. “There's nothing in here about treating rabies,” she murmured. You felt your heart sink, but your girlfriend grinned up at you. “Thankfully, you have a master rabies informant sitting in front of you, so don’t worry about a thing.”

“Alright, Big Words Buckley, what should we do?”

Robin held her hand out expectantly, and you gave her your forearm.

“Did you put a bandage on it?” Robin squinted at your arm.

“Yeah…” You rubbed the back of your head with your free hand.

Robin tutted, running her finger across the leftover residue the bandage left. “You should’ve let it air out.”

“I know, that's why I took it off.”

“Smart.” You looked up to snap back at your girlfriend, but you found there was no sarcasm in her voice. You reddened ever so slightly.

“Did you disinfect it?”

You shook your head. “I washed it with antibacterial soap and body wash, but nothing more than that.”

“We can rinse it with alcohol.” You raised your eyebrows at that, prompting Robin to roll her eyes. “Not that kind of alcohol, like rubbing alcohol.”

“And here I was, thinking I was going to get blasted tonight.”

Robin released your arm, moving to retrieve the rubbing alcohol from underneath the sink.

“This will probably sting,” she said, going back to her place on the bathtub while soaking a cotton pad with alcohol.

“Won't hurt as bad as the bite,” you joked, but you immediately winced once the alcohol made contact. Sure, your wound wasn't open anymore, but it still managed to get in between the somewhat healed skin.

Your sharp inhale prompted Robin to stop pressing the pad to your arm. She looked up at you with concern, an odd look from your usually playful girlfriend.

“It’s fine,” you managed, forcing yourself to exhale slowly.

“Alright.” Robin pressed the pad back down, wiping your arm down once a suitable amount of time passed.

“Anything else, Doc?” you asked lightly, taking her hand into yours.

“Not anything we can do now,” she said, squeezing your hand before leaning over to throw away the pads. Robin got to her feet without removing her hand from yours, pulling you up in a swift move.

“Well well,” you teased, “you’re a regular prince charming.”

Robin shrugged, pulling you in to press a soft kiss against your lips. “What can I say? I’ve wooed my fair share of maidens.”

Robin released you with a grin to wash her hands in the basin. She only looked up at your reflection in the mirror when you wrapped your arms around her waist, pressing your cheek against her shoulderblades.

“Hello there,” she chuckled softly, turning off the tap.

“Hi,” you smiled.

Robin stood up, twisting to face you before placing her wet hands on your cheeks and kissing you loudly.

You laughed and placed your hands on her chest, pushing her away. “Now look at what you’ve done! I'm all wet!”

“Oh, are you now?” Robin gave you a mischievous grin, snaking her hands beneath your shirt.

“Stop!” You tried to wriggle away from your girlfriend, but that only caused her to pull you closer.

At some point you gave up, allowing her to dry her hands on you.

“That doesn't seem to be the most sanitary option,” you warned as she finally pulled away.

“Why not? You just showered, so there's probably not that much sweat or oils on you.”

“Fair,” you agreed.

Robin cocked her head to the side. “Do you wanna stay overnight?”

You smiled in response. “No, dumbass, I want you to send me out into the cold like a forsaken harlot. Yeah, I wanna stay overnight.”

Robin kissed your cheek and took your hand to lead you to her bedroom, even though you already knew the way.

“Might I offer you our humblest chambers,” Robin batted her eyelashes and gestured to the floor. “We don't offer this rug to just anyone.”

“Oh, shut up,” you pushed past your girlfriend, launching yourself onto her bed, bouncing on top of her bed as you landed.

“Make yourself at home, why dontcha?” Robin muttered, but there was a playful spark in her eyes.

Robin made a big show of rearing up and jumping on top of her bed, and by proxy, you.

“Oof.” The air in your lungs whooshed out of you.

“Oh, are you okay?” Robin asked, rolling off of you.

“I'm fine,” you said, rolling onto your side to look at her.

You really could admire her forever. Robin’s mousy brown hair looked almost golden in the moonlight. You held up a hand to bat at her hair.

“Hey,” Robin tucked that strand of hair behind her ear.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” you breathed. Robin’s cheeks tinged pink ever so slightly.

“Don't play with me,” she said, laying down on her back, her eyes to the ceiling.

You propped yourself up, taking her cheek in hand. “I'm serious,” you whispered affectionately. “I'm the luckiest girl in the world.” You leaned in for a kiss, pressing one on her lips, then both her cheeks and nose.

Robin finally laughed, a soft thing, rumbling underneath your forearm. You smiled down at her, finally laying down, your head on her chest, her arms around your waist.

“Goodnight, love,” she whispered.

“Goodnight,” you whispered back, snuggling closer.