#he belongs in a cringe compilation (affectionate)

[ddarker-dreams]

"kuni... i had a dream about you. about us... you were actually kind of sweet, in it..."

Scaramouche swears he could get drunk on the expression you direct at him now. Wistful with a touch of yearning for something that’d never be fulfilled. It brings out the best of your features, almost giving the appearance that you’re glowing. 

His appreciation could only last so long, until he begins ruminating on your word choice, as he so often does. If there ever were a certification test on all things you, he’d pass with flying colors. A prodigy in the field. He could even host seminars, though he wouldn’t, because he’s the only one who gets to have access to this invaluable information. 

It’s this unparalleled expertise that makes him glare at you. “What? Am I not sweet enough when you’re awake?” 

“Um...” you trail off, blinking rapidly, “Is that... is that a trick question?” 

Alright, well, you didn’t have to sound so genuine. That’s rude. 

He flicks your forehead. “Maybe if you acted a little cuter, I’d dote on you some more. I’m capable of being quite pleasant when the situation calls for it. You just need to work harder to bring my soft side out.” 

You put a finger to your cheek and hum. “Does such a fabled ‘soft side’ really exist? I’m not convinced.” 

“Oh, it most certainly does,” he returns with a smile that feels increasingly strained by the second. “So go ahead. Act cute and earn my esteemed adoration. You should feel privileged to even have the opportunity.” 

The face you make almost hurts his pride. Almost. “No thanks. I think I’d rather get struck by lightning.” 

His eye twitches. “That can be arranged.” 

“See! This is exactly what I mean. The dream version of you is much better, I prefer him by far.” 

Instead of reciprocating your bickering, his breath hitches, and he gnaws on the inside of his cheek. “Do you really?” 

“It’s not even a competition. Wait, hold on... you’re not jealous of yourself, are you? Is that possible?” 

“... Shut up, already. Your voice is getting on my nerves.” 

“Aw, but I need it to bring out your soft side.” 

Your forehead receives yet another flick for this infraction.