#he just has a yearning like most people that rears its head more profoundly when he comes into contact with someone who

[recitedemise]

𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗮𝗱𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝗺𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗱𝗶𝗴𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗯𝗹𝗲. Even as a child, Gale struggled to find steadfast friends. He had rambled too much, was a prodigious student among overly envious wizard boys, and honestly, to make sure he kept in the good graces of most, he, with some practice, hammered a mold. He didn't wear a mask, of course, more leaning on concealing his more 'unsavory' quirks, but it was not unlike walking like just half of he was--offering, essentially, the more 'palatable' parts. He was proud, sure, riling his share of more insecure peers, but he was good at magic, obnoxiously good, and in time, people weathered that pride to essentially ride his coattails. As Mystra's chosen, however, that doubled in force. He learned to hide himself, learned he was loved exclusively for magic. He made more friends among those lonely evenings in his tower, growing familiar with the voice of long dead authors and finding, of course, fulfillment in words. In fact, his idea of romance comes largely from words. It's partly why when smitten, he's such traditional ideas. He's not socially inept, mind you, but many of his thoughts come taken from stories, and if asked, he'd admit to having his heart steeped a touch in romanticism--though age, blessedly, has tempered the naive.

With the orb, unfortunately, he learned to quell himself only further. Gale could only feel so much, a terrible weight for a man who longs most to be seen and heard. Again, he'd further stemmed his excitements, his babbling passions and the stars in his eyes, and even despair and heartache were halved or quartered, or else, of course, the orb would burst. Now, he's learned not to be burden, that on top of being something half of himself. Suddenly, Gale being Gale wasn't just halfway a nuisance, but Gale being Gale could be more than inconvenient--Gale of Waterdeep is now plainly catastrophic.

Gale doesn't exactly hate himself, but it's hard for him to think anyone would like him for him. He's so starved to show himself just as he is--and it's partly why he rushes to give himself over completely when the moment's right.