#her problematic friend has a crush on that guy because he's in fucking sane

[doppelnatur]

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[forestwater87]

Do you happen to have any headcannons for Edward Pikeman/ the woodscouts? Any for the flower scouts? (And I understand if you wanna take time to answer or do separate posts; if you wanna answer it at all).

I haven’t really thought about it, but since Petrol is one of my new Favorite People, I think it’d be fun to sit down and do these guys! Llllet’s go!

1: sexuality headcanon:

Straight. Slimy, sleazy straight boy.

2: otp:

No one. He … needs to learn how to not be quite so creepy first.

3: brotp:

Him and the Woodscouts, definitely. He’s the only one who calls Billy “Snake,” and Petrol is apparently willing to fall in acid for him. They’re the only 3 people in a dying camp, but they seem to be really close-knit and it’s actually hella cute.

4: notp:

Him and Gwen. For one thing, I don’t think he’s a counselor, so there’s no way he’s older than, like, 20 on the very outside. So ew. But also I’ll hear the way he said “Mmmmhmmm” in my nightmares. No, no, Gwen deserves better.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

I think he was the youngest in his family, and that his siblings are all super popular and successful. It makes him throw himself into the Woodscouts, because that’s something he’s fairly good at, and that’s why he’s so eager to win Camp Campbell and improve the quality and numbers of the Woodscouts: to prove to himself that he’s a winner. He’s also ridiculously competitive in general, and a little like a Chihuahua — small, not very threatening, mostly just annoying, but highly confrontational and super delusional about his own abilities.

6: favorite line from this character:

“That’d be immoral.” I love the way you can practically see the italics as he speaks.

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

Uh … I also don’t have great skin?

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

Everything. All of his everything.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Problematic, absolutely.

1: sexuality headcanon:

Demihet, biromantic. No idea where this headcanon came from, but I’m going to cling to it like it makes sense.

2: otp:

He looks like he’d be good with someone like Ered. They could do badass things together and look awesome.

3: brotp:

All the other Woodscouts, again. No idea what he sees in Pikeman, but apparently it’s enough to keep him sticking around.

4: notp:

I see the Woodscouts so much like a family that the idea of any of them together feels vaguely incestuous. No clue why, but it squicks me out in a big way.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

He’s actually relatively popular in school and stuff, but for some reason he tends to gravitate not toward the cool kids, but toward the losers like Pikeman and the Woodscouts in general. It’s not an intentional thing, his affinity for lost causes, but he’s the jock who’ll kick your ass if you’re bullying someone he’s fond of.

I also think he’d tend to be friends with really talkative, outgoing people, because he’s very much the “strong and silent” type. It’s a big part of why people think he’s cool, but really he’s just kinda shy.

6: favorite line from this character:

He … doesn’t have lines.

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

Pretty sure my legs are literally that skinny.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

Never! He’s too awesome!

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

CINNAMON. ROLL.

1: sexuality headcanon:

No sex. Just honor. (And Scouting.) Maybe he’ll grow into a sexuality, but he strikes me as either ace, or just too dedicated to The Cause to be actually interested in romantic or sexual anything.

2: otp:

None.

3: brotp:

WOODSCOUTS!

4: notp:

Any adults.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

He doesn’t need the eyepatch. He just thinks it makes him look cool. Sometimes he’ll switch eyes if one of them gets tired.

6: favorite line from this character:

“I made a vow.” He couldn’t be more Zuko if he tried, Jesus. Dante sure has a Type, doesn’t he?

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

Candy canes are a year-round snack.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

He wants to be cool so badly. The insistence on being called “Snake” (and no one doing it) is really sad.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Neither, really. I don’t have strong feelings in either direction about this kid.

1: sexuality headcanon:

Girls. Not necessarily exclusively, but certainly a preference. She loves girly, feminine things so much and it extends to women; she’s convinced forever when the right (tough, rugged) guy comes along she’ll fall for him and they’ll have a perfect fairytale romance. Eventually … she’ll realize that she likes girliness so much in part because she just likes girls, and she likes being around them.

2: otp:

Nikki and Sasha is the ship I wish I didn’t love. I do not believe that all antagonistic ships are automatically True Love, but how cute would it be if years later they ran into each other, and Sasha had grown up to be less of a shallow person, and she realizes “oh shit Nikki’s hot” and they become the most badass power couple ever?

3: brotp:

Her friendship with Tabii. She’s so good and supportive even though her friend is legitimately troubled, and her willingness to get dragged along into these crazy schemes is heartwarming, in a weird way.

4: notp:

Don’t have one, adults aside.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

She has OCD, or a similar anxiety-related disorder. She excels so much in the Flower Scouts because everything is based on cleanliness and routine, and being able to meticulously organize everything in her entire life so that it’s aesthetically pleasing and perfect to the last detail is extremely comforting and relaxing to her. This is part of why Nikki upset her so much (and she was the driving force behind getting her out of the Scouts); it went beyond simply “ew, boy things!” and became a genuine source of stress, having her carefully-organized life upturned by this filthy child.

6: favorite line from this character:

“Seriously Tabii, what the fuck?!”

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

I love pink!

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

She’s a bitch. Not sure that’s embarrassment or irritation, but it’s hard to watch sometimes.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Definitely problematic, definitely a fave.

1: sexuality headcanon:

More or less straight; has a huge thing for David. (Yes, I literally ripped this from my fanfic. I don’t even feel bad.) I like the idea that she’s secretly drawn to dorks — not to the extent that Tabii is, but that she’s not as big a fan as the tough and stoic types as the sweet, puppy sunshine boys.

2: otp:

I … don’t have one. But now that I think about it, she and Tabii would be adorable, wouldn’t they? Or wait, what about Neil? That’d be kinda cruel to poor Tabs, but she finds his nerdiness appealing.

3: brotp:

Her and Sasha. They clearly recognize each other as the sane ones in their troop, and bond over a mutual love of pumpkin spice lattes.

4: notp:

Adults. Again. I’m a boring broken record in this regard.

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

The hair isn’t natural. Sasha helped her dye it because she was jealous of her “cool” hair color, and Erin’s mom is gonna be pissed when she comes home with bright blue hair.

6: favorite line from this character:

“She’s the dumb one.”

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

I love Fraaaaance.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

Nothing, really. The Valley Girl shtick is a little obnoxious, but honestly these girls are just too much fun to really be bothered by.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Neither? Both? Not sure.

1: sexuality headcanon:

Straight as an arrow with a thing for assholes.

2: otp:

I … wish I didn’t like her and Neil as much as I do. But it’s kinda cute. Not exactly an OTP, but I’m enjoying seeing where it goes, and as someone who’s had obsessive hopeless crushes like that, I think it’s extremely endearing.

3: brotp:

Her sister scouts love and support her so much! Also her sister is apparently the greatest, despite feeding her very bad information.

4: notp:

Adults. And … well, she’d probably be awful with Neil. Can it be my OTP and nOTP?

5: first headcanon that pops into my head:

Tabii is actually surprisingly good at school, despite not being very smart. She’s excellent at eyeing something and knowing exactly what someone wants her to do, so even if she doesn’t know the information she’s an incredible test-taker.

And she loves English class, and to write poetry in particular. It’s pretty bad poetry at the moment, but by the time she’s in college it’ll be surprisingly good.

6: favorite line from this character:

“He can pee in me anytime …” Or “he’s so hawt!” (I actually use that second one all the time.)

7: one way in which I relate to this character:

Me in 6th grade? I was Tabii. Girls get crushes so much earlier than boys, to speak in generalities. It’s so hard being in the “I wanna kiss your face” stage when they’re still in the “girls are icky” stage.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character:

She’s just so bad at everything. (Also the way she talked to Bonquisha was a little … uncomfortable. Had a little “privileged white girl” feel to it that made me twitch.)

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Look at this cutie and tell me she’s problematic. Just fucking try it.