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yes-dal456 · 7 years
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49 Tweets That Sum Up Easter For Parents
Easter is less than a week away, and parents are gearing up for egg hunts, creepy bunny photos and serious sugar highs.
As with any holiday, having kids makes Easter extra chaotic ... and extra hilarious too. We scoured Twitter and found 49 funny tweets from parents about celebrating Easter. 
Dad, the Easter Bunny should know that I don't like Rolos but he puts them in my basket every year. Me: (eating a Rolo) Yeah, that's weird.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 28, 2016
Just explained to my kids that sometimes an evil bunny comes and eats kids' Easter candy on the night of Easter.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) March 28, 2016
I forgot to buy Easter eggs for the hunt this morning so I told my kids that this year the bunny hid them REALLY well.
— Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) April 5, 2015
My kids can find 75K plastic eggs hidden outside, but they can't pick up one Lego in the middle of the walkway. #Easter
— Beau Coffron (@lunchboxdad) March 27, 2016
Step 1: Paint Jesus on an Easter Egg. Step 2: Hide the Easter Egg. Step 3: Yell, "You need to find Jesus!" At all the little children.
— Will Rodgers (@WilliamRodgers) March 27, 2016
It's 10:30 at night. Should I tell my kids to give up on the Easter egg hunt or just let them keep looking?
— Darin Loves Bacon (@darinlovesbacon) March 28, 2016
Based on all of the practice my daughters get looking for shoes, Easter eggs don't stand a chance this year.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 27, 2015
Easter tip: Tell your kids you hid an egg with $50 in it in the backyard but you don't remember where. Enjoy a quiet day indoors.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) March 24, 2017
Shoutout to all the parents who wrestled their screaming toddlers into Brunch clothes this #Easter.
— Ana Gasteyer (@AnaGasteyer) March 27, 2016
This is my family after our Easter brunch. I share it b/c NO ONE ASKED THE EASTER BUNNY TO POSE WITH US http://pic.twitter.com/OEFYDmgqag
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) April 5, 2015
Kids really do make the holidays magical and bright. Like, take Easter for example. Did you know vomit comes in pastels, too?
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) March 27, 2016
For real Easter dinner fun, serve rabbit to the kids' table.
— Once Meh, Always Meh (@TheAlexNevil) March 27, 2016
My 8 year old said that he hopes the Easter Egg Hunt is more of a challenge this year so I'm buying a bunch of mouse traps.
— Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) March 17, 2016
The Easter baskets are down to just robin eggs and black jelly beans. This is my official cry for help.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) April 1, 2016
Please let that be chocolate. Please let that be chocolate. Please let that be chocolate. - Every parent on Easter
— Ramblin' Mama (@ramblinma) March 27, 2016
Still waiting for this toddler to find the Easter Eggs that are literally sitting in the grass right in front of them.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 29, 2016
My kid started using air quotes when saying "Easter Bunny," so I started using air quotes when talking about his "Easter candy."
— qwertygirl (@qwertygirl) April 4, 2015
*8 year old walks into kitchen* "Daddy, I have some questions about the Easter bunny." *wife walks into kitchen* *I cartwheel out*
— Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) March 29, 2016
Parenting Tip: Strip down to your skivvies before stealing your kid's easter candy so you can pretend to be sleepwalking if you get caught.
— HammBone (@hammbone84) April 6, 2016
Toddler found two and a half eggs at the Easter egg hunt. Yeah, HALF. No one was messing around during that thing.
— dadpression (@Dadpression) March 27, 2016
Hey, everyone! Look how much Easter I'm having! *Posts all the obnoxious kid and bunny and Easter basket and egg hunt pictures*
— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) March 28, 2016
Do you think Easter is the number 1 holiday for child vehicular barfing?
— Jessica Grose (@JessGrose) March 27, 2016
Easter: Hunt for eggs. Day After Easter: Can't go anywhere without seeing and stepping on plastic egg tops and bottoms.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) March 28, 2016
One fun part about Easter is how your kids spend the entire day getting jacked up on candy and then you remember it's a school night.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 28, 2016
We covered our backyard in candy-filled Easter eggs. My 1-year-old picked up zero eggs and one piece of dog poop. Money well spent.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) April 20, 2014
"He can't drink the Easter egg dye." Submitted By: Ashley http://pic.twitter.com/SsRvbqaA4k
— ReasonsMySonIsCrying (@ReasonsMySonCry) March 28, 2016
When did "Easter crafts" become a thing? What happened to the good old days of putting an egg in all the dye colors & watching it turn ugly?
— Danielle Herzog (@martinisandmini) March 22, 2016
Serious question. When does the Easter Bunny come by to pick up all the kids he just loaded up with candy? #parenting
— Beau Coffron (@lunchboxdad) March 28, 2016
FYI: Talking into a half-eaten hollow chocolate bunny makes your voice louder, in case anyone needs their Easter candy to be more obnoxious
— Wendy S. (@maughammom) March 30, 2016
My kids have figured out every hiding spot I have in this house, so I guess I have no choice but to finish this stash of Easter candy now.
— Ash (@cray_at_home_ma) March 29, 2016
How Easter candy is really made http://pic.twitter.com/EuEJpTSIUz
— Kalvin (@KalvinMacleod) March 27, 2016
A cute and scientific thing I tell my kids is that the Easter Bunny's body would flop around for several minutes after decapitation.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) March 28, 2017
Pro Tip: Christmas lights can double as Easter lights if *you* leave them up long enough. *we*
— Six Pack Mom (@Six_Pack_Mom) March 7, 2017
4 yr old son: "That Jesus guy came back from the dead and saw all these people? So then he's a zombie?"#Easter
— Danielle Herzog (@martinisandmini) March 27, 2016
5: here's the thing about chocolate: it's delicious. Me: is that it? 5: yes. Me: ok. 5: and I found an Easter egg from last year & ate it.
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) March 2, 2017
Jesus died on the cross so you could put pictures of your kid's Easter basket on Facebook.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) April 5, 2015
I forgot to post a picture of my kids in their Easter clothes on Facebook yesterday and now DCFS is knocking on my door.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) April 21, 2014
*Morgan Freeman narrates "Alex thought he'd controlled his demons, but as soon as the Cadbury Easter Eggs went on display, it was all over."
— Once Meh, Always Meh (@TheAlexNevil) January 15, 2017
While we were sleeping, did Easter become Halloween Part 2/Mini-Christmas?? (Some of these baskets, man.)
— Nicole Blades (@NicoleBlades) April 21, 2014
Celebrating Easter by being woke up at 5:15am and letting my kid her weight in chocolate before the sun comes up just like the Lord intended
— Tim (@Playing_Dad) March 27, 2016
[Wipes chocolate from face and brushes candy dust from lap.] I hate those cliche tweets about parents eating all their kids Easter candy.
— Kelcey Kintner (@mamabirddiaries) March 28, 2016
Hey Gals, don't forget to check Pinterest today for ideas on upcycling your Easter bonnet into an April Fool's Day chapeau.
— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) March 30, 2016
People who say “Hoppy Easter!” make me feel like Jesus isn’t risen.
— Sammy Rhodes (@sammyrhodes) March 27, 2016
Real text to my husband: "Easter stuff is ready for the attic. But, please, whatever you do, keep the Christmas welcome mat outside okay?"
— Jenna Fischer (@jennafischer) April 13, 2016
Behind every photo of kids coloring eggs is a parent screaming and threatening to take away Easter.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) March 27, 2016
My 8yo son asked for a smart phone for Easter. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Everything about that phrase is ridiculous.
— Lady E (@LadyEdotMe) March 6, 2017
The Easter Bunny doesn't talk, so here are the kids awkwardly looking at each other like, What do we do now? http://pic.twitter.com/iTMDTx2VWe
— Aaron Schmidt (@byaaronschmidt) March 26, 2016
What came first? The tantrum over leaving a giant basket of candy at home, or the egg hunt? #Easter
— dadpression (@Dadpression) March 27, 2016
Bummed Easter is over. Now which candy/gift bestowing mythological creature am I supposed to use to extort good behavior out of my children?
— John Kinnear (@askdadblog) April 21, 2014
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